#video #Virgin Island Season 2 Episode 4
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00:00Living without it.
00:01The thought of having sex with someone...
00:03...scares me. It gives me the ick.
00:05I'm missing out. Terrified. Nerve-racking.
00:07Gut-wrenching. Embarrassing.
00:09All I think about is what I'm gonna get wrong.
00:12Can you point to the outer lady?
00:15Nope.
00:18Now...
00:19...12 virgins are getting a crash course in intimacy.
00:23Social media, porn, dating apps.
00:26There are so many negative messages and we can help them blossom.
00:29Use it by stimulating the area.
00:31They'll be guided by experts.
00:33You see yourself as...
00:35Proposal.
00:36...to explore all aspects of intimacy.
00:39And maybe even have sex with a trained therapist.
00:43Do you wanna put a condom on?
00:45Or each other.
00:47Get a room, guys!
00:50I really do need to change my life.
00:52Who will be ready...
00:54Desperate times call for desperate measures.
00:56...to go all the way.
01:05Over the past few days on Virgin Island...
01:08I feel so connected to you.
01:09Can I grab your butt?
01:10...learning the dynamics of dating...
01:13This is only phase three.
01:16What do I do?
01:17You have to stare into my eyes.
01:18...led to Callum and Katie becoming closer.
01:21Callum, you make me giddy!
01:23Tegan...
01:23You ready to look at my eyes?
01:24Mm-hmm.
01:25...found self-acceptance in surrogate partner therapy.
01:28I'm definitely a lesbian.
01:30I think that's the best I've ever felt.
01:32...and Bertie...
01:33You can kind of be all the way up, and you can use my hips.
01:36Yes!
01:37...seems to be getting over his inhibitions.
01:39All that thrusting has made me hurt my bollocks.
01:43Now, the group face their biggest challenge yet...
01:47...bearing all.
01:48Nudity is really the phase that people dread.
01:51There are so many negative messages around bodies...
01:53...that the thought of, like, looking at yourself in the mirror...
01:55...can be really daunting.
01:57Noticing if you feel like you want to continue getting undressed.
02:00Lack of body confidence gets in the way of sex.
02:03Learning how to relax around nudity is an essential step...
02:07...in a sexual connection.
02:15Day seven.
02:16Almost the halfway point on Virgin Island.
02:22Oh, no.
02:24Oh, my gosh.
02:26And for many in the group, their biggest challenge yet.
02:29It's time to face and conquer the thing that may have been holding you back...
02:32...as the next phase is nudity.
02:34Please come to this workshop in as few clothes as you feel comfortable wearing.
02:38This is what I've been most scared for.
02:42It's a crucial stage.
02:44Morning.
02:45Morning.
02:46What happens today could define progress for the rest of the retreat.
02:50Have you read your letter?
02:52I was hoping we wouldn't be doing this one.
02:54I would like to feel less shameful, anxious about going fully undressed.
03:00I just don't think I would ever be able to do it.
03:03How are you feeling?
03:04I'm freaking out.
03:05Yeah?
03:06I don't want to do this.
03:10I really hate my body and I really hate what I look like.
03:13So I'm really scared.
03:15My whole body just now feels really tense.
03:18Go on, Betty.
03:20Is it a good morning, really?
03:22Even when, like, I've worn a checkered shirt in public, because I'm worried that the bits like near the buttons
03:29expose the skin, I've always worn a vest under that.
03:32That's how self-conscious I've been about my body.
03:35I'm going to put my best sports bar on.
03:43Oh, I just want to hide.
03:45Do you want?
03:46As I'll ever be.
03:48In front of the experts and their peers...
03:50Here we go, everyone.
03:52Today's workshop is an opportunity for the virgins...
03:55Good morning.
03:57Hello, hello.
03:58...to prove how much confidence they have or haven't gained at the retreat.
04:03Welcome to the nudity phase of the course.
04:06There are so many negative messages out there that make us feel horrible about our bodies, and we really want
04:12to help you change that.
04:14Because at the end of the day, if you want to have sex, you will need to be naked in
04:18front of your partner, and that can be very awkward if you don't feel good about your body.
04:23So in a moment, we're going to start going up to the mirror one by one, and then disrobe.
04:29We believe the more that they're willing to reveal in this workshop, the more it can be rewarding.
04:35Because that barrier of like, oh no, I've never done this before, finally is gone.
04:40Learning how to see their bodies as beautiful, how to take a compliment, and how to say, this is my
04:47body.
04:48Who knows they want to walk first.
05:03For 22-year-old Millie, body image has been a long-standing challenge.
05:09Hello.
05:11I've never been at peace with my body.
05:14Over the past few years, I've just been like, that should be toned, or that should be slim.
05:21Take your time, sweetheart.
05:22It's okay.
05:23Take your time.
05:25And I think if I'm not liking my own body, how can anyone else?
05:32Yeah.
05:46I love your body.
05:48I like it.
05:49It's okay.
05:50You can let the feelings come up.
05:54You can take it in.
05:56But I really got my boobs.
05:58I feel a little weird.
06:01My boobs are very similar to yours.
06:04They serve me very well.
06:08This is my body.
06:12This is my body.
06:18Who's ready?
06:23Callum.
06:26Go on, Callum.
06:30The last time someone's probably seen me naked is probably went, hmm, I don't know.
06:33Maybe when my mum walked in on me while I was changing.
06:36I can't think of any time that I've been naked in front of someone.
06:39Whenever you're ready.
06:44Anything you want to share about your body?
06:46I've got quite strong shoulders.
06:48Can I take these off?
06:49Oh, please.
06:50Yeah?
06:50Yeah, I didn't know you were going to.
06:52Yay!
06:52Young lip ones.
06:53Woo!
06:56Now you can say this is my whole body.
06:59This is my body.
07:01Woo!
07:09One by one, each group member steps up.
07:13I'd like to be more muscular.
07:14What can I say?
07:15You have like the perfect proportion.
07:18To face their reflection.
07:20Can you look in the mirror and say, this is my body.
07:23This is my body.
07:24While some have the confidence to bear all.
07:26The first thing that I thought was, damn, she's fucking hot.
07:33This is my body.
07:34This is my body.
07:35I'm confident by myself.
07:36This is my body.
07:38This is my body.
07:39This is my body.
07:42That's mine.
07:42That's mine.
07:45Others can only reveal so much.
07:47The power in your body is very attractive.
07:59Ed, would you like to come up?
08:03I don't like being nude around people.
08:06Mostly down to my scars and my disability.
08:10My disability is Poland syndrome.
08:13I've got a smaller hand, bent fingers, no knuckle.
08:16Whenever you're ready, you can disrobe.
08:20I don't particularly like any part of my body.
08:23Certain bits stand out more.
08:24Scars from surgery.
08:26A lot of stuff I've done to myself.
08:28My first relationship, that part quite, quite badly for me.
08:33I was self-harming.
08:36I've come to terms with the reason I did it.
08:39And although people say no one will notice, to me, they will.
08:44You don't hear about a lot of males doing it.
08:46Yeah.
08:47It's quite a difficult thing.
08:50How would you feel if I just touched your scars with some love?
08:53Yeah.
08:53Yeah.
08:56Let's see if you can look at yourself.
08:58Yeah.
08:59Let's take one more second and you can just say, this is my body.
09:03This is my body.
09:09The majority of the group have faced their own reflection.
09:13Bertie, would you like to come up?
09:16Bertie is one of the last.
09:19I don't like the way I look without my clothes on.
09:23I tend to not look in the mirror because it's, I don't think it's a pretty sight.
09:31Take a moment and look at me, okay?
09:34Yeah.
09:36When you're ready, just a glimpse of the mirror.
09:39And if you need to come back to my eyes, yeah.
09:41Good job. You're doing it great.
09:46Can you say, this is my body?
09:51This is my body.
09:53This is my body.
10:09Back in school, I really struggled with my confidence.
10:14I don't think there's anything about me that I like, especially looks-wise.
10:20I really just don't like it.
10:24Um, I was always the monster.
10:27Um, I got bullied really badly.
10:28I spat out, had things thrown at me.
10:31Um, social media pages made of me where they've edited my face onto, like, different, like, animals and stuff.
10:37Um, yeah, I've always been insecure and just hated the way it looks.
10:46Okay, brave woman.
10:53This is so cute.
10:55Yeah, you're doing great.
11:00Do you want to start and just say what you see?
11:03I found my feelings.
11:06I don't make up.
11:07I don't have a mirror at home, so I don't see this.
11:11Wow.
11:12So you want to take a minute and actually see if you can bring some loving eyes to your body?
11:18I can't.
11:19Yeah, it's okay.
11:22Do you want to just say, this is my body?
11:26This is my body.
11:39I feel like you are the bravest people on the planet.
11:42One more step into self-reclamation and self-love.
11:55Hi, guys.
11:57Hi, hello.
11:58Oh, my God, you guys have clothes on.
11:59I know.
12:00Who are you?
12:01How's it ever went for you, though?
12:02Terrible.
12:03Terrible.
12:04I'm just not happy about being on my scars and stuff.
12:07I really never noticed them.
12:08Also, scars are cool.
12:09I have so many, which I love on my body.
12:10I'm like...
12:11No.
12:11And they look sick.
12:12I don't mean, like, accidental surgery.
12:14I mean, like, self-harm scars.
12:16My scars, like, self-harm and stuff, I don't think I'll ever be kind of secure with them.
12:21They're kind of a memory of a worse time, really.
12:25Dad noted.
12:26Everyone that went noted.
12:27I wish I could have done that.
12:29My boobs should have sagged down to my knees if I took my bra off.
12:32Have you heard that song?
12:34Do your boobs hang low?
12:36Do they wobble to and throw?
12:38Do-do-do-do.
12:38Can you tie the little knot?
12:40Can you tie the little bow?
12:42That was really hard.
12:43I didn't enjoy it at all.
12:46It was just mental games in my head.
12:48I didn't want to do it, but I knew I had to, to just take this process one step further.
12:54You're doing really well.
12:55This is the phase that I've been scared about the most, and now we're in it, and I just feel
12:59like, shit.
13:08Are you staying over here, Bertie, or are you going over there?
13:10I was going to stay over here.
13:12Don't want to leave you on your own.
13:14Sometimes I like being in my own company, but, you know.
13:17I'll get that.
13:20As long as you're not like an awkward silence.
13:21Yeah.
13:25It's lunchtime on Virgin Island.
13:28I wanted to be a skinny legend.
13:30Go!
13:31Your weight is the least interesting thing about you.
13:33And for some of the group, the nudity phase has brought up deep-seated emotions.
13:38But it's the first thing you see about me.
13:40No, it's not.
13:41It's really not.
13:42Your face is the first thing you see.
13:43And you're also beautiful, and your body is great as well.
13:46And your personality is top tier.
13:48Yeah.
13:52Today, we started the nudity phase, and so many of them found a mirror.
13:57For the experts, one person in the workshop particularly caught their attention.
14:01I was super proud of Katie.
14:04When she was a child in school, people called her a monster.
14:07So for her to come up and to be only in her underwear was extremely brave.
14:12Yeah, I'm really looking forward today to checking in and saying, hey, what's happening here?
14:16She is indicating some deeper emotions with regards to how she sees herself and her self-worth.
14:22Mm-hmm.
14:23With Katie's pastel shaping her self-image, she's meeting clinical therapist Abby to explore what lies beneath.
14:31Everyone I watch on TV or on social media, they're all these beautiful, skinny, model-looking people.
14:38I'm sat here, and I'm the complete opposite.
14:42I'm terrified to be naked in front of someone.
14:45I feel like they're going to look at my body and just pick apart every single bad thing like I
14:50do.
14:53Hi.
14:55Come on in.
14:57My biggest fear if things carry on and I don't lose my virginity is honestly not being able to have
15:03my own family.
15:04I want to hear from your perspective.
15:06What are the things that you want out of this work?
15:09I really, really would like to be more confident.
15:13I feel like I've got zero body confidence, and it's bringing my daily life down.
15:18Mm-hmm.
15:19I got badly bullied throughout the whole of secondary school.
15:22Mm-hmm.
15:22What have they made comments about?
15:24Just like how big I am, how ugly I am.
15:27Mm-hmm.
15:28Do you find yourself big or ugly?
15:30You do.
15:31Yeah, I've always hated the way I look.
15:34Mm-hmm.
15:34And I always put myself down.
15:36Mm-hmm.
15:37Um, I don't like anything about myself, inside or out, so I really do struggle.
15:44Yeah.
15:47What do we know about bullies?
15:49The whole people.
15:51Why is their voice that important to you?
15:54I just feel like because they just align, like, their thoughts are my thoughts.
15:58They're just, they're the same.
15:59So if I'm thinking it, and they're saying it, then it must be the truth.
16:02Mm-hmm.
16:04Because you see yourself as...
16:06Repulsive.
16:08How does that feel, hearing that out well?
16:11Sad.
16:13Yeah.
16:14Yeah.
16:17You're the furthest thing from repulsive.
16:21You're, you're a human being.
16:24I don't see that, though.
16:26What do you see?
16:29A monster.
16:32Yeah.
16:33And I've felt like this for so long.
16:35I genuinely don't think I've ever looked to myself and been, like, even, yeah, half decent.
16:40Like, not even like a, ooh, we look cute today.
16:42No.
16:47Change can occur in incremental steps.
16:53Is there any part of your body you appreciate?
16:57My hands.
16:59Take it a step further.
17:01Your nails are done.
17:03Yeah.
17:03They look really pretty.
17:04Can you appreciate the fact that I like taking care of my hands and my nails because it makes me
17:09feel...
17:10Makes me feel good.
17:12Okay.
17:12I think the more you practice it, and the more you give yourself that permission to get out of that
17:17old language,
17:19it's gonna take time.
17:21And also, it's a practice.
17:23Right?
17:31This phase is the hardest for me just because my own body actually terrifies me.
17:35We just took one extra step today, so I'm just hoping that I can accept it and accept myself.
17:48How was your one-to-one?
17:50Um, cried a little bit when I had to bring up, like, all the old bullying and stuff, but...
17:56Um, she just said, say nice things to yourself, accept all the compliments and...
18:01Yeah.
18:01Really good to you. Like, glad you had a good one.
18:03Yeah.
18:04If you're happy, we're happy.
18:05Yeah.
18:06You look, like, beautiful, by the way.
18:08You're, like, your skin's really glowing.
18:10I don't know.
18:11Maybe it's, like, all the vitamin D that you're getting every day.
18:13LAUGHTER
18:18Hello, mate.
18:19Go on for it, Bertie.
18:21I've tried this on the first day, actually.
18:23Like Katie, this morning's workshop brought Bertie's body insecurities into sharp focus.
18:29I wouldn't do that.
18:30OK.
18:30What do you want to train?
18:32I have no idea. Probably the arms.
18:34Bring it behind your head.
18:36That's good. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
18:38Go on, Bertie.
18:42Actually, you might lie down.
18:46I see myself as very overweight and not attractive at all on a looks front.
18:55Whenever, if ever, I have sex for the first time, it would probably be horrendously awkward.
19:03And, yeah, the thought of me having sex is even making me laugh because I can just imagine it being
19:10so bad.
19:18When Bertie came up to the mirror, it is such a hard step for him.
19:22He was really proud of himself.
19:23It was a huge deal for him.
19:26Bertie is one of the least experienced in the group.
19:28He's never kissed a girl.
19:30He just needs to connect with his body.
19:32Yeah, I'm really excited to see what we need to do to feel more connected.
19:37It's so foundational to have body acceptance and it makes progress possible.
19:44Progress for Bertie could eventually mean having sex with surrogate partner therapist, Kat.
19:49Hi, good afternoon.
19:51If he can overcome his body issues.
19:53How did you feel about the workshop?
19:56When I was wearing my boxers, it was one of the biggest things I've ever done in my life.
20:00I have quite an insecurity about the size.
20:11That's what it is.
20:12To build confidence, Kat introduces an exercise focused on boundaries and consent called,
20:18May I, will you?
20:19May I caress your arm?
20:21Okay, yes.
20:23Can I do it on both hands?
20:24No, because that was the ask, so we want to stay with what you asked.
20:28Yeah.
20:32How did that feel?
20:33It felt very nice.
20:36May I suck your dick for five minutes?
20:42No.
20:43Yeah, yeah.
20:44That was a great answer.
20:45Yeah.
20:45Can you say a little more?
20:46I think we're not at that stage.
20:48Yeah, good job.
20:48Good owning you now.
20:50But I'm not ruling anything out.
20:54May I kiss you on the cheek?
20:57Yes.
20:58Okay.
21:03Will you...
21:04I feel like I just want you to, like, sit on me.
21:09I've got quite a big bottom.
21:10I don't want to crush you, so...
21:12It's really, really important that Birdie feels so much more confident with himself, with his body.
21:17And I don't think he'll feel safe being himself in intimacy without a lot of permission.
21:21And that's something that surrogate partner therapy can really give.
21:25Just lay back.
21:26All the way.
21:27You all right?
21:28Yeah.
21:29Okay.
21:29Okay.
21:32And guess what?
21:33What?
21:34You're not too heavy.
21:40Okay.
21:41Okay.
21:42Um...
21:43I have an idea in mind.
21:46Um...
21:47It's something that has never happened to me before.
21:52Um...
21:53I was thinking, may I have my first kiss with you?
22:01I've not kissed anyone romantically, which, at 24, is a very strange thing to say, when that is the very,
22:10like, almost the first kind of step in a relationship, and I haven't even done that.
22:17There's no shame.
22:18Okay.
22:19All right.
22:20And don't...
22:21I don't want any tums or anything like that.
22:23No.
22:23Perfect.
22:24Just normally.
22:25Yeah.
22:26And you don't have to, like...
22:27You can just kind of relax.
22:28Okay.
22:29I don't want them to be too dry or anything.
22:31No.
22:31Don't worry about it.
22:32Okay.
22:40Good.
22:40That was my first kiss.
22:41You did great.
22:46Wow.
22:47That was fantastic.
22:48That was...
22:48Yeah.
22:50That...
22:50That...
22:50Yeah.
22:52Um...
22:54Thank you so much.
22:55As Bertie's confidence grows...
22:58There we go.
23:00He feels able to go further.
23:06Also, side note, I can tell just from under your pants that you don't have to worry about size.
23:11Just so you know.
23:12Well, it's...
23:14It's...
23:14It's...
23:15I'll say it.
23:16It's very stiff at the moment.
23:18Right.
23:18But when it's not, that's the problem.
23:21Okay.
23:21You're a grower, not a shower.
23:23Yeah, fair enough.
23:25Very, very well.
23:28Thank you very much, Kat.
23:30Love you, bye.
23:30Bye.
23:32I am feeling absolutely incredible.
23:35I feel like the stress has been evaporated.
23:39The next session, I could potentially be getting my clothes off, maybe even fully naked.
23:44We're making very good progress.
23:53It's day two of the nudity phase on Virgin Island.
23:57Halfway through now.
23:58Yeah.
23:58I can't even think what's going to happen today.
24:00It should be easier.
24:02I never say that.
24:03You say that every time.
24:04I never say that, Alex.
24:05No, no, no.
24:10Building on yesterday's body acceptance, today's workshop is designed to take the group further.
24:17Oh, my God.
24:19Into more explicit territory.
24:22We have giant genitals on display because we want to just normalise every different kind of genital.
24:28Welcome.
24:29I don't know where to look.
24:30This workshop's all about getting familiar with your genitals and to understand where the pleasure centres are and how to
24:37start to get in touch with them.
24:38Any feelings that come up with it?
24:40Yeah, very uncomfortable.
24:43I'm less uncomfortable.
24:44It's more like an intrigue kind of thing.
24:46I feel more comfortable with this side.
24:48Hence why I'm sat here.
24:52First thing I want you to notice is they'll look very different depending.
24:56We want to invite Jason up.
24:59Oh, my God.
25:00If they want to have sex.
25:02Didn't even notice.
25:03The virgins are going to have to get better acquainted with real-life genitals.
25:08I have touched, like, a penis.
25:10Couldn't see it.
25:11It was dark.
25:13I think I'm comfortable with female anatomy and male anatomy.
25:17I mean, maybe men are a bit more gross, but...
25:19I've pecked a lad before, and that's as far as any physical contact has ever gone with me and another
25:26lad.
25:26The first thing you'll see is that I am circumcised, so my foreskin doesn't cover the head or the glands
25:33of my penis.
25:34This ridge here, where the head meets the shaft, this is called the corona.
25:40And this spot here is the frenulum.
25:44And this is also very, very sensitive.
25:47Thanks for going on this tour with me.
25:52I don't like this.
25:55Cad, would you like to come join us?
25:58I've watched pornography, and I think the vaginas that I've seen, I worry that, you know, mine's not normal.
26:06I think I know what I'm talking about.
26:08But truthfully, I've probably got no bloody idea.
26:11All right.
26:12I obviously know what the female anatomy looks like, but I wouldn't know where to go, put it that way.
26:22Here is my vulva.
26:24Here's the outer labia.
26:26And then in here, you have the inner labia.
26:29And here's the clitoral hood.
26:31And then there's the clitoris.
26:34I don't want to see other people naked.
26:37It doesn't come naturally to everyone.
26:39I don't feel comfortable.
26:41Also, where it feels good to be touched can change a lot within a sexual experience.
26:46So it's just important to be able to communicate with your partners about what feels good.
26:56Any feelings that come up?
26:58I was uncomfortable at bars, but I feel like I've learned a lot.
27:00Do you feel that your comfort level changes a little bit?
27:02A little bit.
27:03I still don't know where to look, but...
27:04It is overwhelming.
27:06Like, don't get us wrong.
27:10Cheers, guys.
27:11Thank you so much.
27:12Bye.
27:13Bye.
27:15That whole thing I hated.
27:17It made me really uncomfortable, just from start to end.
27:20I'm glad they showed a variety of different...
27:23Yeah, that's what I think.
27:24This is the first time I've ever seen vulva up close.
27:27I rather enjoyed it.
27:29I'd be lying if I said it wasn't weird, but I actually found it quite useful.
27:34How did you find it dirty?
27:35All of a sudden, I've gone off with somebody mega-meat.
27:44So what did you think about the naked pictures?
27:47I'm not going to lie, from far away it looked like trees.
27:50It is some kind of wood in it, so...
27:52Yeah.
27:53Nice.
27:55I don't know if this is just a male thing, but it just seems like vaginas have got a lot
27:58more going on.
27:58I also know now I'll never fully judge a guy for not finding a clip.
28:02There was a couple where I was like, I need to find it as well.
28:06I was like, OK, cool, got it.
28:09Thank you to Jason and Kat.
28:11Bless them.
28:13I feel like a lot more confident moving forward.
28:19It's not just the workshop that is giving Will confidence.
28:22We're letting that touch land in your body.
28:25As Aisha takes steps to help him with his fears of premature ejaculation.
28:30What level of arousal did you feel?
28:33Really pressurable.
28:34But, like, I wasn't shooting over free, really.
28:39OK.
28:40Meanwhile, Joy is building up her techniques to overcome vaginismus.
28:44Touch your perineum.
28:46If you kind of, like, come up from the perineum a little bit, your finger will dip in.
28:51Yeah.
28:53What are you noticing if you're doing that?
28:55There is no discomfort.
28:56I didn't clench up in fear and I was able to experience a little bit of pleasure.
29:03I've shown, like, myself that I can do it, even if it's just for that one little thing.
29:07So, see how next session goes.
29:10As Joy's confidence builds...
29:13It's more of a practical session today.
29:15Yeah.
29:15So, too, does Teagan's work with surrogate partner therapist Riston.
29:20She's showing me her vulva.
29:21This is the vagina.
29:23That is hot.
29:27..as things escalate from looking...
29:30..into touch.
29:33Hello.
29:34Come sit and we'll chat.
29:36Absolutely.
29:37We had talked about doing genital touch today.
29:39How are you feeling about that?
29:40A little bit of nerves.
29:41Yeah. But, which is natural.
29:43But, no, made me excited.
29:44Let's get undressed.
29:45Okay.
29:46Oh.
29:46Do you mind that thing, mate?
29:47Yeah.
29:48Okay, great.
29:49I've never been one-on-one with a woman in a bedroom or anything like that.
29:53Can you pull this up?
29:54Yes, again.
29:56There.
29:57I don't know how to initiate the physical touch myself.
30:02There we go.
30:03And I want that sexual, romantic, intimate connection.
30:07Start pulling these off.
30:08Mm-hmm.
30:09But I don't know how to get to that stage.
30:16How's that?
30:17Yeah.
30:17Good.
30:18Good.
30:18The first thing I'm going to have you do.
30:20Mm-hmm.
30:20You're looking at me, and that's great.
30:23I'm going to have you look at my pussy.
30:24Mm-hmm.
30:25Notice any feelings that are coming out for you?
30:28Tall.
30:30I would like you to, with the backs of your fingernails,
30:34run your hands up my thighs very slowly.
30:37Mm-hmm.
30:37Just super slow.
30:40Mm-hmm.
30:41Mm-hmm.
30:44See if you can see my vaginal opening.
30:47Mm-hmm.
30:48Can you see it?
30:48Yep.
30:49And with this finger.
30:50So don't go in, but just put the finger, like,
30:53right on the bottom of the hole.
30:54Mm-hmm.
30:56Yep.
30:57That's nice.
30:59Mm.
31:00That's nice.
31:08All right.
31:09I'm going to come cuddle you.
31:10I was nervous about giving pleasure, but, yeah,
31:14I feel like a lot of that.
31:16Those nerves have dissipated now.
31:18Mm-hmm.
31:22Hiccup.
31:24Do you know what?
31:25You fingered me and I got the hiccups.
31:28Hmm.
31:29I guess I've got to get back up.
31:31Mm-hmm.
31:32Oh, I'm bothered.
31:33It was the first time I had my fingers inside my woman.
31:36I feel like a whole new person.
31:38You do?
31:38Yeah.
31:39Yeah.
31:42I don't think I've felt happier being on the island right now
31:45than right now.
31:46I feel it's big.
31:47I feel it's big.
31:48It's a massive step forward for me.
31:50Bye.
31:51See you, Liz.
31:51Bye.
31:51That's a big barrier that I've had in my way,
31:54and I feel like I'm a big step closer to losing my virginity.
32:06The sun is shining on Virgin Island.
32:09I hope you know which way we're going.
32:11No.
32:11You're going down here.
32:12And for the last afternoon of the nudity phase, clothing is optional.
32:16We asked a group to take nude photos in pairs.
32:19Who's going first?
32:20I'll take your picture.
32:21Go on.
32:22All right.
32:22It's all about the good shots, Jason.
32:24You do you.
32:25This is all about having fun.
32:27Oh, my God.
32:29Uh-huh.
32:29Here we go.
32:30The goal is to help them feel relaxed around their bodies
32:33and feel comfortable with nudity.
32:36For some of the group...
32:37There we go.
32:38...improved body confidence is on full display.
32:40That's it, yeah.
32:41Ready?
32:42I've never felt this sexy in my life.
32:46Please say you didn't laugh until after.
32:49That just felt empowering,
32:51and I was like, massive sleigh to me.
32:55Smile.
32:57I thought there was some power there, some sort of strength,
33:00and I think maybe I hadn't seen myself in that light before.
33:02Good?
33:04I'm getting sexy vibes.
33:06Not bad.
33:08Okay.
33:08Take the ball.
33:09Whoo!
33:10I don't mind being nude in, like, the ocean,
33:12and I wanted to prove to myself I could at least do it.
33:16Three, two, one.
33:18Over!
33:19But for others, bearing all for the camera is still a step too far.
33:24I tried this, I guess.
33:25Oh!
33:27Oh!
33:28Shit!
33:29Not that.
33:30That's how you do it.
33:32That's how you do it.
33:32I didn't feel like getting naked today,
33:33and I'm glad that Callum told me he wasn't going to get his willy out,
33:39because after the morning workshop I think we've seen enough of those for one day.
33:44After a tough time in yesterday's mirror workshop...
33:47Oh, that's cute.
33:48...Katy is showing tentative signs of progress.
33:51I wish I could show you.
33:52It looks really good.
33:53I know.
33:53I'd love to be able to see.
33:54Her boobs look so good.
33:56It's just been a bit scary, but these little steps are making me, like, open up.
34:04That's it.
34:04Like Katie.
34:06It's going to be very underwhelming, I'm telling you now,
34:08because, like, I'm still in clothes, so...
34:10I ain't getting undressed here.
34:11The nudity phase has exposed some of Ed's body insecurities.
34:19I'm just glad this phase is nearly over.
34:21Anything's easier than this one.
34:22My scars and my disability.
34:25There's certain things, especially with intimacy,
34:28where I do feel like it's going to negatively impact it.
34:34The scars are embarrassing.
34:36It makes even, like, just cuddling with someone a little bit more awkward.
34:40It feels, like, kind of stalled in life.
34:44I feel a bit like a kid, to be honest.
34:46Having built up a relationship with Ed at the retreat...
34:48Hello.
34:50How are you?
34:51Better than this morning.
34:52That's good.
34:53Expert Cat feels she can relate to his body issues
34:56from her own personal experience.
34:59I noticed that Ed had scars,
35:01and that's something he was really insecure about coming in,
35:04and I also do.
35:06And so it felt really powerful to, like, share that space.
35:09I think something that's really important for you to practice
35:11is, like, really coming to people as equals.
35:15Okay.
35:16And I saw your scars.
35:18It was confronting for me because it's a part of myself
35:21that I still can feel so much shame around.
35:24I get that.
35:24But when I see them on you, I don't have any judgment.
35:28Like, I only feel so much, like, love and compassion,
35:31and it creates more of a sense of care.
35:34It just felt really comforting to, like, not feel alone with it,
35:39if that makes sense.
35:40You feel comfortable taking off your shirt?
35:43Yeah.
35:51I'm going to take my bra off, too.
35:57Okay.
35:58How are you feeling now?
36:00A little bit nervous.
36:01Yeah.
36:01Just start by looking and breathing.
36:05I'm just looking.
36:06I touch you.
36:08Will you touch me also?
36:09Mm-hmm.
36:14Can you sit down?
36:15Yeah.
36:18Will you touch my scars while I touch yours?
36:22Yes.
36:23Does that feel okay?
36:24Yeah.
36:24Yeah, it's okay.
36:25I have the one on my chest as well.
36:27The worst one is the one down on my arm.
36:30That one.
36:30Mm-hmm.
36:31That's what made me stop.
36:33Mm-hmm.
36:37I'm always worried about people touching mine
36:39and not knowing how it feels to them.
36:42So, with you, um,
36:45I feel like I can be vulnerable as well.
36:48Mm-hmm.
36:49Like I'm not alone.
36:58Right to touch your feet.
37:07Thank you, Kevin.
37:10Knowing that we've both got scars,
37:11and possibly for, like, similar reasons,
37:13I didn't feel any, like, body issues at all.
37:18I completely forgot that I have any,
37:21and I felt really good about myself.
37:30Go on, Jason.
37:32Woo-hoo!
37:35This morning.
37:36I was like...
37:37I looked in the mirror and went,
37:37Katie, your eyebrows look really good today.
37:39Yeah, that's brilliant.
37:39And also, I feel like after yesterday's exercise,
37:41that's what you need.
37:42And obviously, it's all positive things,
37:44so...
37:44I'm like...
37:45It's all mental.
37:47While Katie makes tentative progress on her body image...
37:52Jason, your hair looks lovely.
37:57Yay!
37:59The experts want her to take the plunge
38:01and move on from her past.
38:05I'm going to be seeing Katie today,
38:07and the things that people have said to her
38:09about her body and her looks are truly destroying
38:13of a person's sense of dignity.
38:16I would love to bring Katie to the mirror
38:19if she feels ready,
38:20and to start to find something that brings her joy
38:23would be, I think, a big step.
38:28Ayesha plans to revisit the mirror exercise one last time.
38:36Social media is really hard for bullying.
38:38People will just constantly pick you apart
38:41and make you feel more insecure.
38:44I've had a lot of things posted on me.
38:47I was scrolling through once,
38:49and someone had asked who's the ugliest girl in school,
38:53and this person had written my full name.
38:56That was really difficult.
39:02Hello!
39:03Hello!
39:05I'm just feeling which piece of clothing wants to come off.
39:09Um, let's do my top.
39:12Okay, great.
39:14I really don't like this.
39:15I feel like I've got so much blood, like skin and stuff,
39:20and so much hatred for myself.
39:22Mmm.
39:24See if you can remember being with your body
39:27and not hating it.
39:36That must have been so nice.
39:39Young Katie did not care about what others thought
39:41or what others said.
39:43Yeah.
39:43And she didn't hate herself.
39:45Yeah.
39:45Sometimes, Katie, what happens is
39:48when we live with people who torment us,
39:50we can actually carry their voice in our head
39:54and we think it's ours.
39:58Mm-hmm.
39:59But it's not ours.
40:03Noticing if you feel like you want to continue getting undressed
40:06or if you feel good as you are.
40:09Um, I could take a short swap.
40:10Okay.
40:16This is so weird.
40:18Okay.
40:19What's happening now?
40:21I'm sick of just hating every part
40:24and just looking at the bad parts of myself.
40:28How do you want your body to feel?
40:30I wish that I would have let go of nasty things
40:34created with me on social media.
40:36Yeah.
40:37I've screenshotted it and I've still got the pictures
40:39on my phone from many, many years ago.
40:41Wow.
40:43Because I like to look back at them
40:44and make myself feel bad again.
40:47What would letting it go have that, like,
40:49not even thinking about it ever again?
40:51Because they don't deserve it.
40:53Yeah.
40:53And I don't deserve it.
40:54Yeah.
40:55After years of criticism shaping how Katie sees herself...
40:59Would you like to do it dressed or undressed?
41:01Dressed.
41:01Okay, great.
41:03Now Ayesha challenges her to push back.
41:06My hair...
41:09It's so dead, but it grows really quickly.
41:13My stomach.
41:15I hate how big it is, but it fuels me every single day.
41:19You're rocking right now, Katie.
41:21My boobs are very droopy,
41:26but I feel like they suit my body.
41:29Yeah.
41:30I want to be a mum so bad.
41:33So, yeah, milk.
41:34Yeah.
41:35Comfort for my babies.
41:37Wow, beautiful.
41:41Thank you so much.
41:42See you later, Katie.
41:43See you later.
41:44I really loved how relaxed and comfortable I felt.
41:47This new growth and self-exploration that I've found,
41:50has just changed my entire life.
41:53I would love to be able to just carry that on.
41:56So, I'm really happy.
42:03As the sun sets on the nudity phase...
42:06Everybody, come on over!
42:09..the experts have gathered to give the group
42:11one final opportunity to shed their inhibitions.
42:14You just finished the nudity phase
42:18and we are so proud of you.
42:21So many of you got naked
42:22and felt more comfortable relationship with your body.
42:27And...
42:28That's like a culmination and celebration of this phase.
42:31We all take a little group swim together.
42:34You can undress to your level of comfort.
42:36I will be going full naked.
42:38Who's brave enough?
42:40You're thinking about it!
42:43That's all for me.
42:44You're taking your shoes off!
42:47You're taking your shoes off!
42:49One, two, three, three, four!
43:01Woo!
43:03Woo!
43:05Woo!
43:06Woo!
43:06Woo!
43:06Woo!
43:07When we jumped in the sea naked, it was so freeing.
43:10The nudity phase is awesome.
43:13I have absolutely no idea why I did that.
43:16But hey, I'm absolutely glad that I did.
43:19It's definitely one of the biggest things I've ever done.
43:22I feel like I've ended the phase on a high.
43:25I've learned how to be a little bit nicer to myself.
43:28Every single person is different, and every single body is different.
43:32It's crazy to think about, but right here, right now,
43:35yeah, I feel like I could do anything.
43:40Next time...
43:41Hit my hand with the dick.
43:44Things get hands-on.
43:46You can put your finger inside.
43:49I'm just kidding.
43:49As a special guest arrives for the playtime phase.
43:55And a fantasy...
43:56Get on your knees.
43:57...becomes reality.
43:59Good boy.
44:00Good boy.
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