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Jimmy Kimmel Live - Season 24 - Episode 17: Ted Danson, Duke McCloud, Kashus Culpepper
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00:00From Hollywood, it's Jimmy Kimmel Live!
00:04Tonight, Ted Danson, Duke McLeod,
00:08and music from Cassius Culpepper with The Three Tones.
00:13And now, Jimmy Kimmel Live!
00:32All right, I'm Jimmy, and I'm the host.
00:35Thank you for joining us here in Hollywood.
00:40Yeah, well, that's very kind.
00:43I appreciate that.
00:45Settle down, settle down.
00:46We have a lot to go through.
00:47Guillermo, welcome back.
00:49You were not here last night.
00:50Yeah, I went to San Jose, California.
00:52You went for the Super Bowl interviews, right,
00:54that you do every year?
00:55Yeah, that's right, Jimmy.
00:56How did it go?
00:57It went great.
00:57Did you speak to everyone you needed to speak to?
00:59To all the players, and they were so nice with me.
01:01They were great.
01:02Very good.
01:02We miss you.
01:03Don't ever leave us again.
01:04Oh, I won't, Jimmy.
01:05I miss you, too.
01:05I love you guys.
01:06You know, you missed the whole Epstein file.
01:09I know what a big fan you are of the Epstein files,
01:12and you missed them.
01:14These Epstein files are a big deal, obviously,
01:17and a big story.
01:18A story that Donald Trump would prefer just goes away,
01:21but it won't just go away.
01:23It's salacious.
01:24It's the kind of story that makes headlines,
01:25and he knows that.
01:26So what he does is he bombards us with a dozen other crazy things to try to flood the zone.
01:32There's only so much we can take in.
01:34So to distract us, right now one of the things he's doing is suing everybody.
01:38Now, last night, I mentioned Trump is suing the IRS.
01:42The IRS that he runs for $10 billion,
01:46and that he's planning to negotiate a settlement to that suit with himself,
01:51which is just, if any other president,
01:53it would be the biggest story of their whole four years in office.
01:57For Trump, it doesn't even crack the top five this month.
01:59So the New York Times published a story yesterday,
02:02claimed Trump has dropped his demand that Harvard,
02:06the university, pony up $200 million.
02:08Harvard is one of the very few institutions
02:10that is actually fighting back against these shakedowns.
02:13And when Trump saw this, it triggered one of his many daily volcanic eruptions.
02:20He wrote,
02:21Strongly anti-Semitic Harvard University has been feeding a lot of nonsense
02:24to the failing New York Times.
02:26Harvard has been, for a long time, behaving very badly.
02:29We are now seeking $1 billion in debt.
02:33He was asking for $200 million.
02:35Now he wants a billion.
02:37Every post now is a ransom note from the president.
02:40And as far as Harvard goes,
02:42come on, guys, you know how this works.
02:44There's an easy way out of this.
02:45Just give him an imaginary degree of some kind.
02:48Give him an award for his magnificent brain and penis,
02:52and this all goes away.
02:54Give him...
02:55You want to know what to do?
02:57I'll tell you what to do.
02:58Give him the first annual Donald J. Trump penis brain prize.
03:03Problem solved.
03:05I thought you were supposed to be geniuses over there at Harvard.
03:08Trump also doubled down on his tax against the New York Times.
03:11He's suing them for $15 billion.
03:14He wrote,
03:14I look forward to watching their rapidly falling circulation force them to finally close their doors.
03:20And listen, if you really want the Times to go out of business, maybe you should just run it for
03:24them, right?
03:25I mean...
03:28It's hard to keep track, but...
03:29He wants $1 billion from Harvard, $10 billion from the IRS, $15 billion from the New York Times.
03:35And these numbers, where do they even come from?
03:37It's like when a little kid guesses how much something costs.
03:40A billion, million, trillion, hundred, infinity.
03:43And that's on top of the nearly $4 billion Trump and his family have pocketed since he retook office.
03:50According to the Wall Street Journal, four days before the inauguration, a sheik from the royal family of Abu Dhabi
03:56bought a $500 million stake in the Trump family crypto venture, which is called World Liberty Financial.
04:02And then, months after the bribe, I mean investment, the Trump administration agreed suddenly to supply the sheik with highly
04:10coveted American-made AI chips, which the Biden administration had been refusing to sell them because they worried they would
04:17fall into the hands of the Chinese.
04:18But I'm sure that's just a $500 million coincidence, you know?
04:21Remember when Republicans went crazy because Hunter Biden was selling overpriced artwork?
04:27This sheik wanted AI chips, so he said, all right, I'm going to buy Trump's crypto, and I get the
04:34chips.
04:34It was literally a sheik down.
04:37But the president, you will be surprised to hear, knows nothing about any of this.
04:42The Wall Street Journal reported that the royal family of Abu Dhabi invested hundreds of millions of dollars in World
04:48Liberty Financial.
04:49Can you explain why you decided to take that investment? Was that a transaction?
04:53Well, I don't know about it.
04:54I know that crypto is a big thing, and they like it.
04:57A lot of people like it.
04:58The people behind me like it.
05:00My sons are handling that.
05:02My family is handling it.
05:05And I guess they get investments from different people.
05:08Yeah, he's a really good guesser because that is exactly what they do.
05:12They get investments from different...
05:13The man who knows more than the experts about every subject under the sun doesn't know about this.
05:19I think they call it scamnesia.
05:20It's a very serious condition.
05:22The one thing...
05:24The one thing he doesn't know is how much money his family is making.
05:29He basically does the same routine when he gets asked about the Epstein files.
05:32Yeah, what do you want?
05:33On the Epstein files, you talked about Democrats who were in there.
05:35Elon Musk was also in there.
05:36And so was your commerce secretary, Howard Lutnick, and correspondence that he had with him.
05:40Did you read those new files that were published by the Department of Justice?
05:43I have a lot of things I'm doing.
05:45A lot of things I'm doing.
05:47I don't know.
05:48You mentioned two names.
05:49I'm sure they're fine.
05:51Hey, sure they're fine.
05:52There are very fine people on both sides of the Epstein files.
05:55That's what people...
05:56This might be the first time anyone has ever called Elon Musk fine.
06:00And we still don't know the names of most of the prominent men named in the files,
06:04but they did manage to release the names of a whole bunch of the victims,
06:07along with addresses, even nude photos.
06:10But Donald Trump, he's very busy picking out flatware for his new ballroom right now.
06:15And quite frankly, he's tired of hearing about these Epstein files.
06:19I think it's really time for the country to get onto something else.
06:22You know, now that nothing came out about me...
06:25You know, what did you say to CNN?
06:27What would you say to the survivors who feel David got in justice?
06:29You are the worst reporter.
06:31CNN has no ratings because of people like you.
06:34You know, she's a young woman.
06:36I don't think I've ever seen you smile.
06:38I've known you for 10 years.
06:40I don't think I've ever seen a smile on you.
06:42Well, I'm asking you about survivors.
06:43You know why?
06:43You know why you're not smiling?
06:45Because you know you're not telling the truth.
06:47And you're a very dishonest organization.
06:50And they should be ashamed of you.
06:52We are now at the women should smile more stage of his presidency.
06:56I'm trying to think of a worse time to tell a woman to smile more
06:59than when that person is a reporter asking about the Epstein victims.
07:03I can't.
07:04And then you've got the president's former personal attorney
07:09who is now the guy in charge of the Epstein files,
07:12Deputy Attorney General Todd Blanche,
07:14who stopped by Fox News to make this unbelievable statement.
07:17Is there any chance that any of these individuals who partied with Epstein
07:22and engaged in, you know, relations with minors will be prosecuted?
07:28Any chance?
07:29We I'll never say no.
07:32And we will always investigate any evidence of misconduct.
07:35But as you know, it is not a crime to party with Mr. Epstein.
07:39That's right.
07:39It's also not a crime to borrow a bottle of baby oil from Diddy.
07:43They're not crime.
07:44Stop being such a buzz kill, everybody.
07:48Our forefathers had to fight for our right to party with Mr. Epstein.
07:53It's also the kind of thing that that the American people need to understand
07:57that it isn't a crime to party with Mr. Epstein.
08:00It isn't a crime to have blood to his island.
08:01It didn't look like that's all that was going on on some of those photos.
08:04I mean, if the photos could speak, some of them look pretty bad.
08:07That's right.
08:07And unfortunately, photos can't speak.
08:09Whew!
08:10So case closed, I guess.
08:12And now, if you'll excuse me, Jelaine Maxwell needs a fresh yoga mat.
08:15I have to leave.
08:16There's so much to be mad about.
08:18It makes me mad how much there is to be mad about.
08:20Over the weekend, you know, millions of Americans took part in anti-ice protests all across the country.
08:27These were concerned citizens peacefully and passionately expressing their opposition to the crimes being committed against our neighbors.
08:33But Donald Trump, even though there are millions of us, continues to claim the protesters are being paid.
08:38It's really insurrectionists and agitators and they're paid.
08:42And you can tell a lot of reasons.
08:44Number one, they're professionals, you know, with their mouth.
08:46But they're also, you look at the signs.
08:48The signs are all professionally made.
08:50They have signs that are gorgeous.
08:52In fact, I want to get the sign because I'm a big, I need a lot of signs for different
08:56things.
08:56And I want to find out whoever does their signs, they do a beautiful job.
08:59You know, everybody has this beautiful sign with brand new wood.
09:03It's like leather panels.
09:06They have a leather handle.
09:08He does have an active imagination.
09:10I mean, brand new wood, leather panels, leather.
09:13It's like he's describing a Bentley or something.
09:16Power steering, surround sound, beautiful signs.
09:19I was at the protest in L.A. this week and we made our signs out of poster books and
09:24magic markers.
09:25I didn't see anything that was professionally made.
09:28I didn't see anyone getting paid, but I did see a lot of creativity with these signs.
09:32Like, I missed the Melania movie to come to this.
09:35The only ice I like is the ice my two gay boyfriends skate on.
09:41Tom Homan looks like a canned ham.
09:45Super callous, fragile, racist, sexist, Nazi, POTUS.
09:48This one is from Minneapolis, dearly beloved.
09:51We are gathered here today to dismantle this thing called ice.
09:54And our son Billy came up with a good idea for saying you stop taking away people.
10:00And then he added a threat to the sign.
10:03I'm going to stop putting ice on my drinks.
10:08You know, if it was up to our filet of fascists, we wouldn't have the right to protest or vote
10:13for that matter.
10:13Trump is now floating the idea of having the federal government take control of elections from the states.
10:19He would prefer that we pick the winner out of a MAGA hat this time around.
10:24He said Republicans should take over voting in about 15 places, like the state of Minnesota, which he claims to
10:31have won all three times, even though he lost Minnesota all three times.
10:35He has the FBI and the always suspect Tulsi Gabbard seizing voter information in Georgia from the 2020 election, which
10:42is clearly an attempt to fix the next election.
10:45And also, I think he somehow wants to go back and erase his loss in 2020.
10:50We had one good day in the past 10 years.
10:52He's trying to take that away from us, too.
10:55And as unpopular as Trump is here, even more so overseas.
10:59This is from the carnival of Via Reggio in Tuscany, which goes back to 1873.
11:04This year, they spent a lot of time designing this puppet of our president being held by a giant bird
11:12and a mean little bald Donald Trump.
11:17He's suing that float for $20 billion, by the way.
11:21And that brings us to another instance of detachable hair.
11:27There was a heavyweight fight between a guy named Kingsley eBay and Jarrell Big Baby Miller at Madison Square Garden
11:32over the weekend that included one of the funniest mishaps in the history of sports.
11:37Is it coming off?
11:41What is happening here?
11:44It is.
11:47Oh, wow.
11:48He's losing his hair.
11:51Wow.
11:52That is going to make the rounds on social media.
11:55That's like a cartoon.
11:59Oh, my goodness gracious.
12:02It is a toupee.
12:03And he just took it off and threw it into the crowd.
12:07Now that, my friends, is a champion in every sense of the word.
12:11That is...
12:14Not since the Real Housewives of Atlanta has a wig been knocked off a head like that.
12:19How that happened, I have no idea, but I wanted to find out.
12:21So we reached out to Jarrell, and he joins us now.
12:24He's from Brooklyn, New York.
12:25Please welcome Jarrell Big Baby Miller.
12:28Hello, Jarrell.
12:30Now, Jarrell, usually you look like this, right?
12:36This is now...
12:37Is that a wig that we're seeing there?
12:39Oh, definitely not.
12:40That's my full hair there, man.
12:42I'm still blessed with some hair.
12:44So after the fight, originally you said you'd accidentally washed your hair with bleach at your
12:48mom's house.
12:50Yes, yes.
12:51That didn't...
12:52Well, I actually kind of lie out of my mouth.
12:54Forgive me for that.
12:55You know, I had to think of something fast on the spot.
12:57It really was...
12:58It was these enhancements you get, you know, from the beauty supply store, like the black
13:02spray, and we call it Beijing.
13:04Okay.
13:04I kind of overdid it, left it in my hair for like two, three days.
13:07And when I washed it out, I washed out half of my hair.
13:10Wow.
13:10It was very horrible scene, and I had to think of something fast.
13:14So who put the hairpiece on your head?
13:18So I was in the car with my cousin, and he actually has a barber, and he's really good
13:22at these, you know, toupees.
13:24So I say, oh, he got the piece, and he got these pieces.
13:26So I said, let's go check him out real quick.
13:28I didn't want to find a national TV again on MSG without my hair, you know, not there.
13:34And it looked amazing at first when he first did it.
13:36And man, he said, I'm going to make it really strong, double reinforcement.
13:39He put the tape on, the glue and everything.
13:42And I'm like, man, I'm looking good.
13:43I'm like sizing myself up.
13:45I'm like, all right, this is smooth.
13:46We're going to be all right.
13:47But the opponent I fought fight, he was not having it.
13:51He was trying to knock my brains out.
13:53It always starts with a cousin, doesn't it?
13:55Have you beaten your cousin's barber up yet?
14:00Honestly, I think everybody found his page, and he's been MIA since then.
14:04I think he's been MIA since then.
14:06I'm like, you know, we're going to hunt for him.
14:08But we can't get in contact with him right now at all.
14:11At what point in the fight did you realize that the hair was coming off your head?
14:16Really?
14:17I was probably getting my butt whooped.
14:18And I found, I instantly felt an AC.
14:21It was like a drift.
14:22And I thought, oh, please.
14:23And I said, nah, I don't think so.
14:25I didn't hear the crowd.
14:26And when I got back to my corner, my trainer's looking at me.
14:29He's giving me instructions.
14:31And usually, he doesn't stutter.
14:33But, man, he started stuttering.
14:34He's like, you're getting your behind the wall.
14:36I need you to focus.
14:37But he's not paying attention to me.
14:39I'm like, why does he keep looking up?
14:40I said, please, God, don't tell me this, this toupee's coming up.
14:44I looked over the jumbotron, and that's when I finally realized, oh, no.
14:48I'm screwed.
14:49At that moment, I said, God, time to go WWE on it.
14:54That was it.
14:56And then you handled it so well.
14:59It went to work.
14:59You threw the hairpiece into the crowd like a bride.
15:02I think we have a video of that here.
15:05And it landed on, did it land on the chair, or did somebody put it on the chair?
15:10Actually, it was one of my opponent, one of my future opponents.
15:13I'm thinking he's WWE champion that I want to fight.
15:16He actually grabbed it, and he was like, hey, I got your hair, man.
15:18So I'm trying to knock him out.
15:21But it was so motivational, because I'm getting my butt whooped at the same time,
15:25and I'm losing my hair.
15:26So I had to make sure I'd go out there and rally this win.
15:28But you did win the fight.
15:30And where is the hairpiece?
15:34Has the Boxing Hall of Fame reached out to put that hairpiece on display?
15:39I have no idea.
15:40We've been looking for the damn hairpiece in this MIA right now.
15:44Get on eBay auction for $5,000.
15:46$5,000?
15:47At least.
15:48At least.
15:49Now, would you mind taking your hat off?
15:51Because I would love to see what's going on right now.
16:08100%.
16:10You look a little bit like the San Diego Padres mascot right now.
16:15I look like a bullheaded parrot.
16:17That's what I feel like.
16:18Well, thank you, Jarrell.
16:19That is Jarrell Big Baby Miller.
16:21And we appreciate your talking to us tonight.
16:25We've got a fun show tonight.
16:26Six-year-old Duke McCloud is here.
16:28We have ninja from Cassius Culpepper.
16:30And we'll be right back with Ted Danson.
16:42All right, there.
16:43Tonight, he is the star of a big hit show called All Her Fault.
16:46And he's also six years old.
16:48Duke McCloud is with us tonight.
16:50Which has to be, must be the greatest name for a six-year-old of all time.
16:54And then later, he is a firefighter and Navy veteran from Alabama and a very talented musician, too.
17:01This is his album, Act One, music from Cassius Culpepper.
17:05Tomorrow night, we will be joined by Kate Hudson and Football Hall of Famer Michael Irvin.
17:10So join us then.
17:11Our first guest tonight is one of the all-time greats on screen and off.
17:15You can see him and his wife, Mary Steenburgen, on season two of A Man on the Inside.
17:20All episodes are available on Netflix now.
17:22Please welcome Ted Danson.
17:42It's very good to see you. How are you?
17:45I always forget how small this chair makes me feel.
17:48Does it?
17:50Well, does it make you feel small?
17:52Because when he came out, I thought, oh, yeah, he's big.
17:54He's Sam Malone.
17:55There he is, big.
17:56Oh, yeah.
17:57Yeah.
17:57Yeah, thanks.
17:58That did it for me.
17:59I'm back.
17:59I'm back.
18:01You know, I was thinking about the scene on Cheers where you, as Sam Malone, pulled off
18:09your hair and revealed that to Carla, right?
18:13No, I didn't.
18:13Was it Carla?
18:14No, I didn't.
18:15You didn't?
18:15No, I didn't.
18:16I didn't wear a hairpiece.
18:17What are you talking about?
18:20Yes, I did.
18:21And they were sweet enough to ask me beforehand, before they wrote the show.
18:25I would hope so.
18:26Would you consider doing that?
18:28And I went, of course.
18:29I remember thinking, though, that was so, I mean, just so cool that you would do something.
18:34Because nobody would do something like that back then.
18:37Still, it's rare.
18:38Yeah.
18:38And what's great is that Carla had no intention of telling me her secret.
18:43She just went screaming out into the bar.
18:47You, um, I had fun on your podcast, uh, well, a few months ago that was, right?
18:51I did too, yeah.
18:52Ted has a podcast called, um, every, where everybody knows your name, with Ted Danson
18:57and Woody Harrelson sometimes.
19:01Anyone who knows Woody finds that very funny, because it's true.
19:05Yeah.
19:05It was, it was true in my case.
19:06It was not one of those times.
19:08Yeah.
19:08It was just me and you.
19:09We got pretty deep, though, I think, right?
19:11Yeah, I got your ass fired, I think, is what happened.
19:14Because a week, a week later, two weeks later, you were off the air.
19:19Can I tell you something?
19:20It was, it was like four days later, I think.
19:22It was, what?
19:23Right before that happened.
19:24Yeah.
19:25Yeah.
19:25You were the last face I saw.
19:27Yeah.
19:30This is pretty cool.
19:31This is.
19:31I haven't been able to book a talk show host since then.
19:35I know, yeah.
19:36You, um, they're on the Paramount tour.
19:39There's a tour on the Paramount lot.
19:41And one of the stops is this.
19:43And this is, um, what, do you remember doing this?
19:47Um.
19:491989, it says here.
19:50It says, yeah, Woody and Ted put their hands in the cement,
19:54and they were here naked.
19:56Naked, yeah.
19:57Does this mean, Ted, Woody was the only one naked?
20:00Or were you, and who was wearing a shoe while they were naked?
20:03That's another strange thing.
20:04What I want you to do is, is, uh, have that image in your head tonight
20:09when you try to go to sleep with the two of us bent over naked?
20:16You won't sleep for a month.
20:17I don't even.
20:18Oh, you'd be surprised.
20:23When you, I assume you go back to the Paramount,
20:26how long were you on the Paramount lot with Cheers?
20:28Cheers, 11, then, I was on 18 years.
20:3218 years, because then Becker was on the Paramount lot as well.
20:36And, and now, your new show, you shot that on the Paramount lot last season, right?
20:42Yes.
20:43Yeah.
20:43Yes, yes.
20:44It was great, because, uh, it's still a universal show,
20:47but the, uh, Paramount architecture fit the story perfectly.
20:52Does it bring back a million memories?
20:55Yeah, it was great.
20:57And, and Mary, my wife, Mary Steenburgen, and I love her.
21:02She's one of the few people who doesn't panic halfway through her name,
21:06going, Steenbur...
21:07Oh, really?
21:08They go, Bergen or Burgen, and they panic,
21:11and out comes nothing.
21:12You are brave.
21:13Thank you very well.
21:14That's how I got the job.
21:16Yes.
21:16I passed the Steenburgen quiz.
21:19Mary, sometime in the mid-'70s, got cast by, uh, Jack Nicholson
21:24in her first film.
21:26She was waiting tables, like, weeks before that, in New York.
21:30She had studied acting and was doing improv and stuff, but...
21:33And the office that he said,
21:36relax, you know, you're in the movie, and they called her parents,
21:40uh, was across from Stage 25 where I did Cheers.
21:44So we, we had a little tour and took our grandkids and went,
21:47this is where your granddaddy on this is.
21:49Did they enjoy it, or...?
21:51They did. Yeah, yeah.
21:52We put them on camera, so that...
21:54Um, and in those days, and I love imagining this,
21:57because it was like, like, every day was a crossover episode.
21:59You'd be on the lot with what other shows? What are, like...?
22:03Family Ties. Uh-huh.
22:04Uh, Mork & Mindy.
22:06It just went on and on. There were about six or seven shows,
22:09and the camaraderie is so great that writers would say,
22:13hey, we're having trouble breaking this story,
22:15and all their buddies from other shows would come and work that,
22:19you know...
22:20They'd help each other out. Yeah.
22:21And then did the actors interact as well?
22:23Yeah, a little bit. Uh, Gary Goldberg, who was the creator of, uh...
22:28Family Ties?
22:30Yeah, Family Ties, was an amazing basketball player
22:32out of Manhattan.
22:34So he made a basketball court, and Woody was brilliant.
22:37George Wendt could shoot three-pointers like crazy.
22:41Really? Yeah.
22:41Really? Yeah.
22:42Wow! Yeah.
22:44God, why wasn't that on television?
22:46Would you take on the other shows?
22:49No, just each other.
22:50Just play against each other?
22:52Yeah, it's so different.
22:53Now, you know, I take a nap, and I do this,
22:55and somebody prays over me, and I get up and do the show.
23:00Back then, you would play basketball,
23:02come in sweating and bleeding, and, you know,
23:05your makeup running off, and you... action.
23:08This is an image that has haunted me since I was a child.
23:11Is that us?
23:11I remember seeing this.
23:13This is you and Leslie Nielsen
23:16in a movie called Creepshow, which came out in 1982.
23:19And it looks...
23:21It looks like a comedy, and, you know,
23:23you got two funny guys here, obviously.
23:24But this was a very scary scene.
23:27Yeah.
23:28I had slept with his wife, and this was his comeuppance.
23:32No, that was the plot of the movie, yeah.
23:35Oh, yes.
23:36Yes, yes.
23:37Locked in the middle.
23:40This was...
23:41And were you actually buried up to your neck in sand there?
23:44Well, they're very clever.
23:45They, uh...
23:46This was the...
23:47No, this was shot early on, but then when the tide comes in,
23:51and I drown...
23:52Yeah.
23:53And you...
23:53You know, they wanted that on film, obviously.
23:55So they made this tank.
23:57It was the last shot of the movie, and it was a glass tank
24:02and filled with water and a little, you know, bench for me to sit on.
24:06And then I sat in, and they put this regulator, you know, for breathing.
24:13They would reach down and go like this.
24:14I had thought, last shot, I'm gonna get stoned.
24:23I have no words.
24:25Who cares?
24:28I sat down, and they went like this, and my body filled with panic,
24:33and I...
24:34They took it out, and I was...
24:35I was blowing bubbles, screaming and, you know, wanting out,
24:39and it was like, yeah, good.
24:42No!
24:44Really a nightmare.
24:45Nightmare.
24:46Unbelievable.
24:47Well, Ted Danson is here with us.
24:49It's just a man on the inside.
24:57Beginning now, I'm gonna use various undercover techniques
25:03to secretly gather information about her,
25:06never letting on, not even for a second,
25:09that I am a private investigator.
25:14I'm a private investigator.
25:16What?
25:17I'm an undercover private investigator.
25:19I recorded our first kiss with a spy camera, but I deleted it.
25:24It wasn't pervy.
25:25Also, I stole your purse.
25:28That is Ted Danson and his bride, Mary Steenburgen, and a man on the inside.
25:35And congratulations.
25:36This is...
25:37You just got picked up today for our third season.
25:39Yeah, this morning.
25:39Of the show.
25:42Very excited.
25:44You have a great batting average when it comes to shows, don't you?
25:47I have...
25:48Yes, I do, because I've been surrounded by amazing writers.
25:51I've been working with Mike Schur for the last six years.
25:55He is something else, isn't he, that guy?
25:56He's amazing.
25:56Yeah, really.
25:57We've been binge watching The Good Place with the kids.
26:01And they absolutely love it.
26:04Every new kind of group of teenagers, when they get to be about 11 or 12, 13,
26:09they love that show.
26:11It's a great...
26:11Yeah.
26:11It really is a great show.
26:12And this is a great show.
26:13And you're working with your wife, which is good, I assume?
26:16Nice.
26:16So good.
26:17Yeah, good.
26:17You drive to work together?
26:18Usually when you have to kiss, you know, another actor, actress.
26:23Yeah.
26:23Or actor, whatever.
26:24And you're...
26:26It's embarrassing.
26:28Because you have mixed emotions.
26:29Right.
26:30And it's weird.
26:31But this was Mary, and I got to...
26:34I was supposed to be falling in love.
26:35It was just fantastic.
26:37It makes it a lot easier.
26:38Yeah.
26:38There's a scene in the show in which you come across a series of nude paintings
26:45of Mary's character, which are, you know, paintings of Mary nude.
26:52Right.
26:52Who did those?
26:56I'm embarrassed to say I didn't learn his name before I had him fired.
27:02Somebody asked me, do you want to take one home?
27:04And I'm going...
27:08I'm going home with her, you know?
27:11But if you don't take it home, that means somebody else has it.
27:15And that means...
27:16Hey, good on them.
27:17Okay.
27:17All right.
27:19You know there's going to be one of those weird auctions in, like, 15 years where somebody
27:24buys nude paintings of your wife that aren't actually even...
27:28I mean, the fact that it's not...
27:29That your wife was not...
27:30She didn't sit for them, I assume.
27:33Of course she did.
27:34Oh.
27:34No, no, no.
27:37No.
27:38No.
27:38That would be very funny.
27:40I hope that happens.
27:41I think that happens.
27:42You almost choked to death on the show, which I think is important for people to know how
27:46much you sacrificed to bring entertainment to the world.
27:51So there's a bit where people and the college students throw this...
27:55What do you call that stuff?
27:56Glitter.
27:58Glitter.
27:59Glitter on people who can't say the school, yada, yada.
28:03Glitter.
28:04And this kid, who was his first day on a set, came running up to do it, and he kind
28:10of just barely touched my hair, and I could tell he was nervous.
28:13I was like, this would really throw right in my face.
28:16I mean, just not a hair, just...
28:18And then as he comes running up, I go, I know.
28:21I'll have my mouth in the form of a big vowel.
28:24Like, I'll go, oh, like this.
28:26Boom!
28:26Right down my mouth.
28:29Glitter.
28:29Glitter.
28:30That if I inhaled, I would literally have been in the hospital trying to get that out
28:34of my lungs.
28:35So they put umbrellas all around me as I was making horrible sounds and gagging.
28:41Yeah.
28:42And may I ask...
28:43It's a great story, by the way.
28:46Did you see the glitter later?
28:51You know what?
28:52I had an idea you were gonna ask me that.
28:56Yeah.
28:56I, uh, I stopped looking at my poop years ago.
29:02We're gonna have to cancel the next guest, everybody.
29:06You made a conscious decision to stop looking?
29:09Yeah, years ago, years ago.
29:11How many years ago?
29:15I'm lying.
29:19Well, good, because, I mean, I was worried about you.
29:21I think that's...
29:22I mean, I think we're supposed to do that.
29:24You are, yes.
29:24Yes.
29:25Yes, yes.
29:26And?
29:27Glitter?
29:27The Last Emperor.
29:31All right.
29:32Well, we'll leave that.
29:33It'll be a mystery.
29:33Perhaps it'll be solved in season three of A Man on the Inside.
29:38Season two, all the episodes are streaming now on Netflix.
29:41Ted Danson, everybody.
29:42We'll be right back with Duke McCloud.
29:44Thank you so much for today.
29:48You're welcome.
29:49This week on Jimmy Kimmel Live,
29:53Michael Urbid,
29:56Odessa Azayom,
29:58and Kate Hudson,
29:59plus music from Whitney.
30:08Hi there, music from Cassius Culpepper is on the way.
30:12Our next guest is a talented kindergarten student
30:14with a name like a rodeo champ.
30:17You can see him at work acting, not roping,
30:19in the Peacock miniseries, All Her Fault.
30:21Please welcome Duke McCloud.
30:40Duke, you brought me a gift, huh?
30:43Can I open it now?
30:44Uh, sure.
30:45Yeah, all right.
30:45I mean, it's your choice.
30:48Oh, you brought me a Lego set.
30:50How nice.
30:52Oh, that's nice.
30:53I know you love Legos, right?
30:56Yeah.
30:56How fast could you put this thing together?
30:58Pretty fast.
30:59Pretty fast, yeah.
31:00Are you a champ?
31:01Are you a, what do they call them,
31:03people who are good at Legos?
31:04Lego master?
31:05Yeah.
31:06You are a Lego master, huh?
31:07Yeah.
31:08You know, my son loves Legos, too.
31:10He's old, though.
31:12He's eight years old.
31:15You're six years old.
31:16When do you turn seven?
31:18October 25th.
31:19Okay.
31:20So not for a little bit.
31:21You go six, seven, right?
31:23Is that exciting?
31:23Six, seven?
31:25Or is that, my kids told me that's over now.
31:27Yeah, kind of.
31:28I think that, too.
31:29You think that, too, yeah?
31:34Do you like going to school?
31:36Pretty much.
31:38Did you go to school today, or did you get out of it?
31:41I don't do school today.
31:43Oh, you didn't go to school today.
31:45Which I'm happy.
31:46You're happy, yeah.
31:48You don't like going to school?
31:50Not that much.
31:53School's for suckers, right?
31:55Pretty much it does.
31:58Do you have all your teeth?
31:59Have you lost any teeth yet?
32:00Yes.
32:01Yeah?
32:01How many did you lose?
32:03Two?
32:03Did you get money from the tooth fairy?
32:05Yeah.
32:06How much does the tooth fairy bring nowadays?
32:09Well, my first tooth, she brought me only three.
32:13The first tooth, she brought you, what is that, $3?
32:16Yeah, only three.
32:17How much did she bring you for the second tooth?
32:19I haven't lost any second tooth.
32:22I mean, I pulled it out from the dentist, but I don't know if she brought me money.
32:28She didn't give you?
32:29Oh, my God.
32:30Hold on.
32:30I got to see if I have any money in this suit.
32:34All right.
32:35Here's five bucks for the tooth.
32:37Thanks.
32:41I'm going to make it an even five since the tooth fairy was so cheap with you for that $3
32:45tooth.
32:46So there you go.
32:47Now you got five bucks a tooth, okay?
32:53I like the suit that you're wearing.
32:55Do you like to wear suits?
32:57You like to dress up?
32:58Yeah.
32:58You do.
32:59What are those bands on the suit, on your arms?
33:03Is that just decoration?
33:04Um, no.
33:06It means that Tom Brown made.
33:09Oh, the designer?
33:11What?
33:15Tom Brown, the designer, made your suit, and you know that, huh?
33:20Really?
33:21Have you met Tom?
33:23Is Tom a real person?
33:25I don't know.
33:26You don't know.
33:27I heard you like to dress up like Darth Vader.
33:31Why him?
33:32You know, he's a bad guy.
33:33I like bad guys.
33:35Oh, you do?
33:38You like villains, huh?
33:40What other villains do you like?
33:42Um, all of them.
33:44All of them, huh?
33:46Would you like to play a villain one day, maybe in a show or a movie?
33:51Like a play in a movie?
33:53Yeah.
33:54Pretty much, yeah.
33:55Yeah.
33:56Do you have brothers and sisters?
33:58I have a brother.
33:59You do.
34:00You have a brother.
34:00What's his name?
34:02Dash.
34:03Dash.
34:03Duke and Dash.
34:05Do people talk about your name a lot or what a great name you have?
34:08Well, pretty much half of the people I heard, yeah.
34:12Yeah.
34:13Are you starting to get sick of talking about your name?
34:17I like when they call me.
34:18You do?
34:19Okay, good.
34:19That's nice.
34:20That's a good attitude to have.
34:21We saw you on the red carpet at the Golden Globes, which was very exciting.
34:26Wearing, um, did Tom Brown make this suit for you?
34:30No.
34:30He did not.
34:31Your mom gave you a warning before you went on the red carpet.
34:35Do you remember what that warning was?
34:37Yes.
34:37It was the same one that my mom told me today.
34:43And what was that warning?
34:45Um, like, no saying bad words and, like, no saying mean stuff.
34:51Yeah.
34:52No saying mean stuff and no saying bad words.
34:54Now, do you say a lot of mean stuff?
34:57Sometimes you...
34:58My brother does.
34:59Your brother does.
35:03What kind of mean stuff does your brother say to you?
35:08Pretty stuff that I tell my mom about.
35:11Does your brother ever use bad words?
35:15No.
35:16He doesn't.
35:17You do, though, sometimes?
35:18Sometimes, yeah.
35:20Yeah.
35:22Would you mind telling me some of the bad words that you use?
35:29You want to whisper it in my ear?
35:31Well, my mom, she, um, has a video that I said all the bad words that we shouldn't say.
35:39Oh.
35:40What was the most fun one?
35:44All of them.
35:46You're all good?
35:47You're all good?
35:47Okay.
35:48All right.
35:49Now, your brother's an actor, too.
35:51Who's the better actor, you or your brother?
35:55Both of us.
35:56You're both very good?
35:57Yeah.
35:57That's a nice thing to say.
36:02We have something very special for you, because I know you like Legos, and I'd heard you like
36:07to dress up like Darth Vader.
36:09Have you seen Star Wars?
36:10You've seen the movie?
36:11Yeah.
36:11Yeah, you have.
36:12Okay.
36:13Guillermo, why don't you wheel in the gift?
36:14We have a gift for you.
36:15Now, it's interesting that you gave me the gift that you gave me, because the gift we are,
36:20we have for you, is this.
36:33What do you think?
36:35It is real cool.
36:38How long do you think it'll take you to put that together?
36:41As long as it takes for you to build that flavor.
36:51That's a pretty good present, isn't it?
36:53Does seeing a present like that kind of make you want to say a bad word?
36:59Kind of.
37:03Well, you're a good kid.
37:05Your mom told you not to use any bad words, and even though I tried 45 times to get you
37:09to say one, you didn't say one.
37:11And you know what?
37:12You've earned that $7 in your Lego vest.
37:16Well, it's great to have you here.
37:20Duke McLeod, everybody.
37:21All her fault is on Peacock now.
37:24We'll be back with Cassius Culpepper.
37:34Thanks to Ted Danson, Duke McLeod, and Big Baby.
37:37Apologies to Matt Damon.
37:39Nightline is next.
37:40But first, his album is called Act One.
37:42Here with the song, Man of His Word, Cassius Culpepper.
37:59Here with the song, Man of His Word, Cassius Culpepper.
38:04Here with the song, Man of His Word, Cassius Culpepper.
38:26Here with the song, Man of His Word, Cassius Culpepper.
38:30And, dass es demiever!
38:30He's so young.
38:31He's so young.
38:32And he's so young.
38:33He's so young.
38:34My name is Thoris.
38:36He's a young woman.
38:37He levels given the landscape.
38:41He forwards given the landscape.
38:42He feels like he's fellin' talk to us.
38:46She don't need a man who keeps talking
38:50She needs a man of his world
39:07She's always looking for a savior
39:09Someone who'll shave her
39:12Yeah, a beauty, not a breaker
39:14Or do it now to save her
39:17But they never come
39:21As a lover in a stranger's room
39:24Ways up
39:27She don't feel anything but the dark
39:31And the danger
39:34Easy to lie than her daddy told her
39:37Easy to scar that she kind of 13
39:40Easy to late night crying
39:43Is it the bones of a broken dream
39:47Fins the wings on me
39:50You're flying
39:51Easy to cry near the earth
39:54She don't need a man who keeps talking
39:57She needs a man
39:59Well, she needs a man of his world
40:03Of this world
40:14Your promise is easily made
40:18Easily broken
40:22And love is more than words
40:25And it's broken
40:28Easy to lie than her daddy told her
40:31Easy to scar that she got 13
40:34Easy to late night crying
40:37Is it the bones of a broken dream
40:41Is it the bones of a broken dream
40:42Is it the bones of a broken dream
40:43Is it the wings on me
40:44You're flying
40:45Easy to cry near the earth
40:48She don't need a man who keeps talking
40:51She needs a man
40:53She needs a man
40:54Well, she needs a man
40:55Of this world
40:58Of this world
41:01Of this world
41:06Of this world
41:07Yeah, yeah
41:36Yeah, yeah
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