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The Daily Show - Season 31 - Episode 47: Annalena Baerbock
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00:03From the most trusted journalists at Comedy Central, it's America's only source for news.
00:10This is The Daily Show with your host, Jon Stewart.
00:27Hi, everybody!
00:37Thank you so much. Welcome to The Daily Show. My name is Jon Stewart. Great show for you tonight.
00:41Later on, we're going to be joined by the president of the United Nations General Assembly, Annalena Baerbock.
00:48We'll be joining. She's president.
00:55And we will talk about how nobody knew that the United Nations General Assembly had a president.
01:01I did not know that.
01:04Ladies and gentlemen, I want to start the program tonight in a slightly different place.
01:09I want to give credit where credit is due. We don't, obviously, often do this.
01:15The president did a solid over the weekend.
01:17President Trump signed an executive order in front of his fraternity brothers fast-tracking the FDA process for novel psychedelic
01:27drug treatments for veterans suffering from all forms of PTSD and other psychiatric conditions, including addiction.
01:32You know, I'm sorry. I'll let the president explain off the cuff as he does.
01:36In a 2024 study from Stanford University, 30 special operation veterans with traumatic brain injuries underwent.
01:45It's called ibogaine treatment. Ibogaine. Remember the name. Is that pronounced relatively properly, what you said?
01:54I don't want to get it wrong. Ibogaine.
02:04Body. Body. Body. Ibogaine. Ibogaine. Rogaine with an ibog. It's easy.
02:11By the way, they gave you the easiest hallucinogenic to pronounce.
02:15They could have thrown f***ing ayahuasca in there.
02:19Psilocybin. But they gave you ibogaine.
02:21But even when they dumbed the s*** down for him, it's a problem.
02:26I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm falling into old habits.
02:29It's good. You did a good thing. I'm nitpicking.
02:31I apologize.
02:33A lot of the people are going to get the help they need.
02:36I, Bogaine, because it's so important.
02:38And experienced an 80 to 90 percent reduction in symptoms of depression and anxiety within one month.
02:46Can I have some, please? I'll take it.
02:51I'll take whatever it takes.
02:53Oh, my God.
03:05He's depressed, too.
03:09Hey, don't be depressed, sir.
03:12Trump won't be president forever.
03:16But I have to say, there are little moments in these Oval Office gatherings that are somewhat revelatory of the
03:23president's psyche.
03:25And really a good starting place for any accredited mental health professional.
03:28I don't have time to be depressed.
03:31You know, if you stay busy enough, maybe that works, too.
03:35That's what I do.
03:39You can't get depressed if you stay busy.
03:42It's a little thing called outrunning the darkness.
03:47You can't be depressed if the sadness can't catch you.
03:56And to be frank, I don't think Donald Trump should treat that with hallucinogenics anyway.
04:03But if he did, would we even notice?
04:09If he took a hallucinogenics, he'd be like, they're eating the cats and dogs right near my beautiful ballroom.
04:20By the way, did you know I'm Jesus?
04:33The poor fellow in the bed is still sick.
04:41Really freaks me out every time I look at that picture.
04:45All right.
04:46You know what, though?
04:46Well, maybe Trump's already taken them, given how intensely he focused on the signing of this bill.
04:54I mean, he signed the shit out of this bill.
05:12You think Biden can do that?
05:27Hey, man.
05:28You ever really looked at your signature on weed?
05:42Look, I think it's a good thing what he did.
05:45I swear to God, it's a good thing what he did.
05:47And this is not political.
05:48I don't mean this as political, but it was weird as shit the way he signed that.
05:56It was weird as shit.
05:57Like, I'm looking at that signature right now.
05:59Does that even say Donald Trump?
06:04The last name is longer than his first name.
06:08It doesn't look like, it looks like it says Leonard Skinner.
06:12It doesn't even, it doesn't make any sense.
06:17None of this makes sense.
06:19Go, go.
06:20You know, I'm sorry.
06:21I'm trying to derail the program.
06:23Can we go back to just play him writing the last name?
06:26I swear to God, he doesn't write Trump.
06:33No, you're just not trying to write it right.
06:36That's too many letters.
06:39I counted like 10 letters.
06:41Unless he's just adding characters like this is his Wi-Fi password.
06:48That doesn't say Donald Trump.
06:50I would make sure this executive order is even legal.
06:53Because it appears to have been signed off by David Hasselhoff.
06:57That says David Hasselhoff.
07:00But the signing capped off a bit of a winning streak for the president.
07:03The biggest news being the Friday announcement of his total victory over Iran.
07:08President Trump marches to victory.
07:10Trump told the media Iran has agreed to everything.
07:12The announcement really sparked a huge surge on Wall Street.
07:15New record highs on the S&P 500 and the NASDAQ.
07:18Crude oil prices falling off a cliff.
07:21Most of the points are already negotiated and agreed to.
07:25You'll be very happy.
07:27A great and brilliant day for the world.
07:31Wow.
07:37If I may offer you a humble apology.
07:42I was one of the naysayers who said this president got us into a war on an impulse.
07:49I said this president didn't have a plan for a coherent exit strategy.
07:52I said this president was cavalier about the damage that this war of choice would cause.
07:55I said this president seems to slosh when he moves because of the venous insufficiency.
08:02You're like a milk carton when you push across the kitchen table.
08:11I said all of those things and I would like to take back three of those statements.
08:18He does slosh.
08:21But the president's allies knew all along what time it was.
08:26The president is playing chess when the rest of the world is playing checkers.
08:33That's how he does it.
08:36I can't believe at the beginning when the whole thing started that the rest of the world didn't say,
08:40Wait, why are you playing?
08:41Why do you have a horse and a castle?
08:44And we have the little discs.
08:47What kind of chess were they playing?
08:49He's playing three-dimensional chess.
08:51Four-dimensional chess.
08:52Playing 5D chess.
09:01That's the chess where the seats move and they spray water at you.
09:08I'm sorry.
09:12Analyst Dean Cain, could you expand on that?
09:15President Trump is playing 5D chess.
09:17The dominoes are slowly just falling and toppling.
09:24What game is he playing?
09:25Is it chess?
09:27He's playing chess and then the dominoes.
09:29He's at checkers ordering dominoes.
09:31The point is,
09:35I'm hungry.
09:37And while the world played Jenga,
09:38Donald Trump is playing hungry, hungry hippos.
09:41Whatever the analogy is.
09:43Because of Trump's brilliant interdimensional Jedi mind,
09:46he basically got everything he wanted from Iran.
09:49Iran has removed or is removing all of the sea mines.
09:52No money will exchange hands in any way, shape, or form.
09:55They will never have a nuclear weapon.
09:59The USA will get all nuclear dust.
10:02The nuclear dust?
10:05Does that mean we also get the nuclear dust bunnies?
10:12It's so adorable how they beg for death.
10:16But look, the enriched uranium was a huge part of this war.
10:20And the fact that Iran has agreed to transfer all of its enriched uranium
10:24to the United States, it's a win.
10:27The Iranian foreign ministry says Iran's enriched uranium
10:31is not going to be transferred anywhere under any circumstances.
10:41I guess checkers is a tougher game than I thought.
10:46All right, so there's still a couple of fine details to work out on the nuclear aspect,
10:49but the truth is, we only fought this war to get Iran to open the Strait of Hormuz.
10:54That, they closed when we started this war.
10:57But, let's keep the main thing the main thing.
11:00Iran has just announced that the Strait of Hormuz
11:03is fully open and ready for business and full passage.
11:10Damn.
11:12That news is ibogaine to my ears.
11:20Could Biden have done that?
11:22No, because as I said earlier, the Strait was already open.
11:26But, you heard it straight from the president.
11:29He declared the Strait of Hormuz is open.
11:33Iran declared the Strait of Hormuz closed.
11:45Oh, boy.
11:47All right.
11:48Iran is directly contradicting President Trump,
11:51and he's not going to like that.
11:53On Truth Social, he wrote the following,
11:55The United States is going to knock out
11:57every single power plant,
11:59every single bridge in Iran.
12:01No more Mr. Nice Guy.
12:03Civilian infrastructure?
12:04Go on!
12:06No more Mr. Nice Guy.
12:08Say hello to senior war crime.
12:13Pew, pew, pew, pew.
12:17Sorry, sorry.
12:18Sorry.
12:24The audience seems to be split between old people
12:27and younger people, right?
12:28I think that's very clear what's happening here.
12:30I think that's very clear what's happening here.
12:35Now, you might be thinking to yourself,
12:39how did this happen?
12:40How did the certainty of total resolution
12:43that Trump announced morph into the uncertainty
12:46of total annihilation that Trump announced
12:49in less time than it took Carol G to own Coachella?
12:55Cool, Dad.
13:02Hey, who wants an edible?
13:13Multivitamin.
13:13Inedible multivitamin.
13:18See, what the naysayers don't understand
13:21about Trump is that what appears
13:24to the outside observer as chaos
13:25is actually the 5D-focused stratagems
13:29of a master negotiator.
13:31This is the art of the deal.
13:33You know, we never got to see Henry Ford assemble a car
13:38or Thomas Edison put the first filament
13:39into a light bulb
13:40or Malcolm OnlyFans reveal his bare foot
13:43in the town square.
13:46But thanks to God,
13:48the Iran war has given us all an opportunity.
13:50This is history to witness in real time.
13:52Donald Trump applied the sacred principles
13:55of the art of the deal.
13:58Let's begin just a few weeks back
14:00when Donald Trump and his bombing buddy, Bebe,
14:03launched fierce military strikes on Iran
14:05in the middle of a negotiation.
14:07Setting the stage for art of the deal.
14:11Step one, state your demands.
14:13The president declaring in a truth social post,
14:16there will be no deal with Iran
14:18except unconditional surrender.
14:20It's where they cry uncle
14:22or when they can't fight any longer
14:24and there's nobody around to cry uncle.
14:26Uncle?
14:27They cry uncle?
14:29The president may be confusing war
14:31with tickle fighting,
14:32but the point is that...
14:37I remember when Lee cried uncle at Appomattox.
14:43But you always start every negotiation
14:45by demanding everything,
14:46which sets you up for step two,
14:48art of the deal,
14:49the consequences of not exceeding to step one.
14:52We're going to hit them extremely hard
14:55over the next two to three weeks.
14:57We're going to bring them back
14:59to the Stone Ages where they belong.
15:03Yabba-dabba-oom.
15:05Total surrender or total destruction?
15:08Game? Set?
15:10And... I'm sorry.
15:12Iran has shut down the Strait of Hormuz.
15:15Counter move.
15:18Shutting down the Strait of Hormuz?
15:20Well, cry me a whore river.
15:24What's that going to do?
15:26The closure of the Strait of Hormuz
15:28causing chaos to the global economy.
15:30Disrupting the global supply chain.
15:32Causing gas and food prices to surge.
15:34Skyrocketing jet fuel costs.
15:35Sending fertilizer prices soaring.
15:37A global economic downturn
15:38that could ignite mass famine.
15:45All right, motherfuckers.
15:49I didn't want to have to do this.
15:59All right.
16:00You want to go, Iran?
16:02You want to do this?
16:03Move like that.
16:06Might unbalance your run-of-the-mill dealmaker,
16:09but the master has already prepared a step three.
16:13The president wrote,
16:14Open the f***ing Strait, you crazy bastards,
16:17or you'll be living in hell.
16:38That's right.
16:39The art of the deal, step three,
16:40is basically steps one and two,
16:42but with cursing.
16:44Your move, Iran.
16:45Iran says the Strait of Hormuz is still closed.
16:57I see what you did there.
16:59Your move is no move.
17:02Which brings us to step four.
17:04Iran has agreed to open the Strait of Hormuz.
17:08Boom!
17:09Motherf***er!
17:11Step four, art of the deal.
17:13Just say it's open.
17:17Who's going to check?
17:20Honestly, who's going to...
17:24Who's going to check if it's actually open?
17:27Even if you have a boat,
17:28what are you going to do?
17:28Are you going to drive all the way there?
17:30What are you going to do?
17:31Are you going to go to the Strait of Hormuz
17:32Yacht and Regatta Club?
17:33Get the f*** out of here.
17:35You didn't even know what the Strait of Hormuz was
17:37a month ago.
17:37Now you're a f***ing expert on the Strait of Hormuz.
17:40As far as you know, it's open.
17:42It's open!
17:43But...
17:44Now, the next part's tricky.
17:46Because at some point,
17:48even though you stated very clearly
17:49that the Strait of Hormuz is open,
17:51people are going to realize
17:53it's not open.
17:55They're still not getting food or fuel.
17:58Which is fine.
17:59Because this is where the art of the deal,
18:01where the fourth dimensional chess,
18:03comes into play.
18:05Breaking tonight,
18:06President Donald Trump saying
18:07the U.S. Navy will start blockading
18:09quote,
18:10any and all ships
18:11trying to enter or leave
18:12the Strait of Hormuz.
18:16Hit him with the old razzle-dazzle.
18:18You can't break up with me.
18:19I'm breaking up with you.
18:21Whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo,
18:27whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, oh, whoo, ho.
18:32Whoo.
18:35Now, at this point,
18:36haters might assume
18:38you've been winging it the whole time.
18:40And they might be getting hungry
18:41or much poorer or cold.
18:43And they might have questions like,
18:44hey, Trump,
18:45do you even have a plan?
18:46Well, the art of the deal says, don't fall for that.
18:50I have the best plan of all, but I'm not going to tell you what my plan is.
18:53I don't know if people like you about that.
18:55I mean, who would answer a question like that?
18:57Why would I tell you what that kind of thing?
18:59Step six, art of the deal.
19:01Don't tell anyone your plan.
19:02That would be the dumbest thing you could do, which brings us to step seven.
19:07Call up a news person and tell them your plan.
19:09I just spoke with the president this morning.
19:12The president said if they do not sign the deal, the U.S. will blow up every power plant and
19:18more in Iran.
19:22But telling one person your plan, that's still just 4D chess.
19:25Step eight is 5D chess.
19:28Tell everyone your plan.
19:30I spoke to him on the phone this morning and told me several things.
19:34President Trump today told me if Iran does not sign this deal, the whole country is going to get blown
19:39up.
19:40In our short phone call, the president told me the strikes have caused very great losses on their leadership.
19:45He also told me he doesn't think boots on the ground will be necessary.
19:49He told me that they had agreed to talk.
19:50I just got off the phone with the president and he called.
19:58You see how bummed out Brett Baer was that he called him?
20:02Yeah, I talked to the president.
20:03He called me.
20:04I had the number blocked, but I got there.
20:11So now everybody's on the same page.
20:13It seems like you're moving towards a resolution in a crisp and linear fashion.
20:18Everybody knows the plan.
20:21All that's left to do is send over a high-level negotiating team
20:27to work out the fine print and arrive at an enduring peace.
20:32You've got them right where you want them, where you hit them with step nine.
20:37Who's talking to what now?
20:39The president saying he intends to send Vice President J.D. Vance to Pakistan
20:43for a second shot at peace talks today.
20:46And an important clarification, I just got off the phone with President Trump yet again.
20:50He told me that Vice President Vance will not be leading the U.S. delegation.
20:55But then less than two hours later, I was told that Vice President Vance
21:00would again lead this delegation.
21:08Vance on.
21:11Vance on.
21:12Vance on.
21:14Vance on.
21:16Vance on.
21:17Vance on.
21:19Vance on.
21:20Vance on.
21:22Vance on.
21:23Vance on.
21:24Vance on.
21:27Vance on.
21:28Vance on.
21:29Vance on.
21:31Vance on.
21:33Vance on.
21:33Vance on.
21:34Vance on.
21:35Vance on.
21:36Vance on.
21:38Vance on.
21:40Vance on.
21:40Vance on.
21:42Vance on.
21:43what they've set out to do. Ultimately, achieving a nuclear deal that'll probably be worse than the
21:48nuclear deal Trump pulled our country out of with Iran to start a devastating war that has killed
21:53thousands of innocent Iranians, 13 American soldiers, eroded our credibility as the leader
21:58of the free world, sabotaged the world economy, and will cost the American taxpayers, who knows,
22:02maybe trillions. And as that realization sinks into a population weary of your malignant
22:12narcissism and impulsivity, Trump hits him with step 10.
22:17Cuban's going to be next.
22:21That's right, mother f***er, step 10. Keep moving to outrun the darkness.
22:30When we come back, her excellency, Annalena Baerbaugh, will be joining me on the show. Don't go away.
22:49Welcome back to the Daily Show. My guest tonight, she is the current president of the United Nations
22:55General Assembly, previously served as Germany's federal minister for foreign affairs. Please
23:15so nice to see you.
23:18Uh, are you, do you go by, uh, Madam President, Your Excellency, Ambassador? What is, what is the
23:23preferred, uh, title?
23:26Whatever you choose, or Annalena, but it's hard, it's an Lena, not Lena.
23:31Annalena?
23:31Yes.
23:31That sounds, and I said Lena, because, did I, I pronounced it correctly? I think you might
23:37be wrong.
23:40After 46 years, thank you for that.
23:42No, you're very welcome. I've been meaning to do that.
23:44Uh, you are the president of the, uh, United Nations General Assembly. I think most people
23:48did not realize that there is a president of the General Assembly. How, how long is your
23:53term? Uh, what are the duties?
23:57Indeed. Uh, it's a very short term. It's only one year time. So in German,
24:01we would say you are just being thrown into the water, the cold water, we say in Germany.
24:07Sure.
24:07And then you just have to start swimming. And, uh, yeah, the job is to bring the whole international
24:12family, so 193, to the table. Sounds quite similar. But, uh, in a time, uh, where one
24:21of these member states might have a nuclear weapon, and the other one, uh, just has a conflict.
24:27Imagine if you bring your family to the Thanksgiving table, and you have the cranky uncle, and you
24:31have your hippie mother, and then you just, uh, say, sing from the same songbook. Uh, it's also a hard
24:37job. So, yes, in these times, where not everybody is ready to sing from the same songbook anymore,
24:42my biggest task is actually to defend the songbook, the Charter of the United Nations,
24:46Peace and Security, Sustainable Development, and Human Rights.
24:49Right. For the, for the United Nations. That's what they do. In that analogy, does the crazy
24:57uncle or the hippie mom have the nuclear weapon?
24:59Well, frankly speaking, in history, the woman hardly had the nuclear weapon.
25:08So, as president, you are tasked with selecting, or at least, uh, uh, doing the interviews for the
25:14next secretary general. Is that correct? Right. How many candidates do you have? Is this like a
25:21monster.com? How do they, how do you get candidates to be, uh, the secretary general? How are they
25:29submitted? Is it controversial? Yes, and it will be probably the hardest job interview ever,
25:37because these 193 member states, they can all ask a question, be interviewed. So, I'm presiding
25:42over it. It starts tomorrow, actually. So, if you want to see it. Tomorrow? Yeah, live on UNWeb TV.
25:47So, uh... Wait, what? You're going to do this live? Yes. Transparency we do have in the
25:53international community. Let me ask you a question.
26:01What is the cutoff for resumes? And could I do it once a week? The interview? The job.
26:09The job. Well, unfortunately, it's a 24-7 job. How many people are you interviewing?
26:15At the moment, four. So, yeah, the question was, so how is the process? Um, you have to be nominated
26:22by a member state. Okay. Um, there was a strong call for women. So, 193 member states. There's
26:29never been a woman. Actually agreed on one thing that they strongly called on the nomination of
26:34a woman. Yes, because for 80 years, there never has been a woman. And, I mean, a woman here probably
26:39and out there in the world. We have heard it all before. It was really hard to find one. But
26:43explaining
26:44that after 80 years, you could not find a woman if you have four billion potential candidates,
26:50because there are four billion women and girls around the world. It's really hard to explain.
27:00Here's the other thing, too. My guess is they'll bring in a woman to run it just at the point
27:06where
27:06it's basically unrunnable. Is it runnable anymore at the UN? You have the Security Council,
27:11which can veto. I mean, Russia and China vetoed a resolution to keep the Strait of Hormuz open.
27:19That's where they, I mean, China gets a lot of its oil from the Strait of Hormuz,
27:22and they still vetoed it. How, how difficult is it to even wrangle these countries anymore
27:28for resolutions? If you want to have an easy job, that's not the right one. It's not the right to
27:39be
27:40another option. So when they vetoed it in the Security Council and, uh, yeah, to those watching,
27:46so they are the five permanent members. They do have the veto because for historical, uh, reasons.
27:51Right. And, uh, there has been a new initiative because, uh, obviously the vetoes in the Security
27:56Council led to the situation that, uh, in the past many conflicts could not be, uh, solved and it was
28:03also to the damage, uh, for the United Nations because it's about the credibility. So the majority
28:08of member states said, then you have to come to the General Assembly where all the 193 member states
28:13are. And this happened last week. So I called for this session saying this has to come now for the
28:19General Assembly. We had a big debate with many states underlining that in an interconnected world,
28:27what happened in one part of the world affects everybody. So oil prices have exploded. One country
28:33even declared the state of energy emergency because obviously for poor countries, this is a total, uh,
28:40disaster. It's devastating. So after this session, we saw the ceasefire negotiations coming back,
28:47uh, together again. We have now this kind of unstable ceasefire. Um, so hopefully everybody understands now
28:55that, uh, in this situation nobody can win if we're not coming back to diplomatic, uh, terms and, uh,
29:03that the United Nations is the only place where you can bring together all member states from around the
29:07world.
29:09EPCOT Center. That's a place.
29:12I think it represents most people. Let me ask you a question. Are we putting too much
29:19on the United Nations? You know, my image of the United Nations is, is like that. This, it's the
29:25General Assembly and we come in and we make peace deals. But maybe that's never really been its
29:32function. It seems like what it does well, because a, a well-timed resolution, what does that really do
29:37anyway if it's vetoed or not vetoed? But it seems what the UN does well is as kind of an
29:44international
29:45clean-up crew for the mess that the other nations make. You do foreign aid. You have refugee programs.
29:57Is that something that the UN should, would steer more into? And should we lower our expectations
30:05about their so-called peacemaking abilities?
30:09100% right. Because from the first day on, um, the United Nation was, was not meant to bring
30:17humankind to heaven, but to prevent humanity from hell. So it's therefore the- I bet that sounds
30:23excellent German. Well, yes. So, um, I mean, yeah, because we would go back to German history,
30:36it was unfortunately my country. Exactly. You guys, yeah. Yeah. And we, we learned our lessons and it
30:42took, rightly so, uh, my country back then also was a Cold War being the, uh, divided to come to
30:50the
30:50international family again. But this is why also me personally, as a former foreign minister of my
30:55country, yeah, we are making so clear without this United Nations, without the charter, nothing in the
31:01world would be better off. Sometimes people call the UN naive with all the morals and all the
31:05principles. But the groundfathers and a few mothers, they've been through the worst in life. Two
31:11world conflicts, uh, genocide with six million, uh, Jews being killed. Back then also many, many
31:20countries, more than 50s, 50 were still under colonial power. So this house was built to have at least
31:28some progress. And as you were mentioning, the vast majority of the work of the United Nations is to
31:33prevent conflict. Unfortunately, especially in these times, hate clicks six times better. So the good
31:40stories, uh, hardly make it, uh, to the headlines. And, uh, journalists don't write about the war,
31:45which didn't happen. We learned it also in COVID and the pandemic. There's no glory in prevention,
31:50but this is exactly, uh, the main work the UN is, uh, doing, preventing that. Different conflicts.
31:57That out of a famine, another war would happen. Preventing that was regard to, for example,
32:03when we had the pandemic where no army in the world could stop the virus because it didn't have any
32:08passport. Even the strongest countries could not do it alone. It needed the United Nations with the
32:13World Health Organization to do the vaccination for half of the world's population, uh, children
32:19going around that. We don't have smallpox anymore. This is thanks to the UN. I mean, you haven't,
32:24you haven't been downtown. Believe me. Since Mom Donnie as a whole. Um, what I'm wondering about is
32:34it's, it's, it's the sense that, you know, the changes that might be made in, in the UN to deal
32:41with, uh, all these, uh, various conflicts and things that are coming up are overwhelmed by this
32:49new order of world power play. That people are rebelling against this idea of globalization,
32:57whether, whether it comes through international norms of an international court or the United
33:03Nations. You know, the United Nations is the black helicopters. It's the new world order. It's all
33:08those things. When in large part, it seems like a place where maybe overly bureaucratic, but they're
33:14trying to get aid or take, uh, uh, an international mechanism to help those that have been most hurt.
33:23Yes. By the calamities that the great powers have visited upon the earth. If you were going to,
33:32what, what changes would you make at the UN to maybe make it, uh, more effective? Or is there a
33:40way to sell it to the new populist regimes that want nothing to do with international order? They
33:46don't want international climate treaties. They don't want, uh, international peace treaties, it seems.
33:51They don't want international rules of order. They want might makes right. How, how does the UN deal
33:56with that? Uh, many questions in one. So maybe, uh, start, uh, you have 20 seconds. I can share it.
34:06That's the best what politicians can do. We are very short in answering questions, you know.
34:12Um, so, I don't know, 30 seconds are over. No, no, no, no, please take your time. We got plenty
34:16of time.
34:17It's basic cable. Nobody's watching. I, uh, I, I cherry pick. I cherry pick. Well, first of all,
34:23you're 100% right. The main job is to bring, um, food, literally, to, to the people. And this is
34:31what
34:31I said also when we started this so-called 80th session. Actually, it's the 80th anniversary.
34:37Not so much to celebrate at these, uh, times at the UN. But when we started the 80th session,
34:41speaking in front of, uh, all heads of, uh, states, um, remembering, uh, them, no single
34:47day would the world be better off without the United Nations, uh, because millions of people
34:53would literally starve. You could not enter an airplane, uh, safely, none of us, because
34:59the, uh, civil aviation organization is based with the United, uh, nations. Uh, so for all
35:07of us, it's in our interest and not only for the pure people around the world to have, uh,
35:12this United Nations. But on the other hand, obviously, uh, some thing, uh, now might is
35:17right. Uh, but we have seen, uh, also lately with the Strait of, uh, Hormuz that obviously,
35:23uh, this conflict does not only affect everybody, but also, uh, you need the support of others
35:29to open the Strait of, uh, Hormuz. And, uh, this is why for me, it's crystal clear, the international
35:35peace order, the Charter of the United Nations, is a life insurance for everyone.
35:40Right. And nobody could sleep in silence and peace if we would accept that a bigger neighbor
35:47can just invite, invade, uh, their neighboring country, uh, in the future. And as you mentioned,
35:54the climate crisis, I mean, you can deny it. Uh, you can just pretend. We've tried that.
35:58We can pretend. It's not there, but we could see all over the world the wildfires, which
36:04also do not stop at the richest neighborhoods, uh, in every country around the world. Because
36:09like the pandemic and the virus, also CO2 doesn't have a passport. And it will just, uh, spread
36:16all over the world so we can only fight it, uh, together, uh, in our own interest.
36:20Would you like to see the UN have more teeth in terms of enforcement? Like, where they could
36:25levy fines? Do they levy fines? I don't know what they can do. I know there's certain peacekeeping
36:30things. And, but when, let's say somebody does violate international norms, international
36:35law, UN, I mean, the UN has said Israel has violated, uh, you know, treaties and yet nothing
36:41happens to them. What could happen? Can they levy fines? Can they charge countries? Like, uh,
36:48in baseball, if you throw at somebody?
36:53Well, it's not the world police. Yeah. So you cannot just say...
36:56What if it were the world police?
37:00Well, we tried it with some courts. For example, the International Criminal Court.
37:05Yeah.
37:05Unfortunately, the biggest, uh, powers they did not ratify. Uh, but this is, again, the
37:11strength, uh, of the United Nations.
37:13Right. You have to keep at it. You have to keep trying.
37:14Others said, we move forward. Right.
37:16And this court, as you, you ask, can you try people? Yes, they did. They tried one of the
37:20biggest, uh, war criminals, uh, when we had, uh, the Balkan Wars, when we had...
37:25Sorry about Milosovic.
37:25Yes. We had, we had, uh, Skrebrenica. So a genocide, uh, going on. So they tried them
37:32in front of a court. Uh, now, for example, with regard to the Philippines, they had, uh,
37:37we had the dictator back there. So there's an international arrest warrant and he will
37:42be probably tried, uh, in front of the ICC, uh, the ICC, the International Criminal, uh,
37:48court. For others who have not ratified it, uh, for example, with Assad, then it's not
37:54possible, but they are also arrest warrant. Uh, you mentioned a couple of them, uh, with
37:58different wars going on, uh, right now. So these...
38:02Who's, who's the worst country right now?
38:04Well, I'm the president...
38:06I'm the president of the General Assembly, speaking on behalf of all of them.
38:10Right. Who would they all say is the worst country?
38:17Well, obviously the worst are those who deny dignity from other human beings. And, uh, this
38:22is why we have to stand up for it, uh, every day. Otherwise, coming back to my own country
38:27again, uh, more than 80 years ago...
38:29Why is it so hard for us to learn that lesson? It-it really blows my mind that-that this
38:36idea
38:36that violence and might makes right, to take us back to a world that we were when colonial
38:42powers and imperial powers ruled, and war was, uh, inevitable in-in almost every location,
38:50it-it's, it-it's almost shocking to see how far we've come, and yet people want to go back to
38:58that
38:58much more barbaric way of-of governance. Is that what's talked about in the halls, or-or-or is-are
39:07the
39:08halls of the UN a more administrative place than a philosophical place?
39:13Well, this is a philosophical question. Uh, what-
39:16That's why I'm not in the halls of the UN.
39:18Yeah. So, um, I would say all. Because it's just the diversity of the whole, uh, world. And you asked
39:24before, what do we have to do, and what would be the biggest task? Um, for me and the Secretary
39:31General
39:31Antonio Guterres at the moment to reform the United Nation, to make it more efficient,
39:35because the truth is as well. Uh, and I'm not a fan of sugarcoating, so we have to face it,
39:41that over 80
39:42years, uh, it has built up on mandates resolution by resolution. Uh, so we have 40,000 mandates,
39:49obviously not very efficient, yeah? So, uh, in every company, uh, you would just modernize your system,
39:55and this is what we're doing right now. We're in the midst of a deep, uh, reform called, uh, UN
40:0080.
40:00But at the other hand, you should not use the shortcomings in trying to destroy the whole house.
40:08And this is where we are faced in, and, uh, you were addressing also the financial situation.
40:13If member states, uh, and unfortunately also the host country, do not pay their bill anymore,
40:19obviously this house, uh, cannot, uh, function. And, uh, in a situation that, uh, people,
40:26especially children, are, uh, dying. Right. In this minute, you have, like, rotten, uh,
40:33eight in warehouses. This is obviously a situation which, uh, cannot go on. So, therefore,
40:39as the president of the General Assembly, I can only recall that no day would be better off without the
40:46UN, and this is why we should all strengthen this house of peace and this house of, uh, humanity.
40:51Have you thought about, oh, please. I couldn't agree more that it needs to be, uh, reformed.
40:59And, and, and so my last question is, have you thought about letting the Ellisons buy it?
41:07So they ran Skydance. It's a very small production house. And then they bought Paramount,
41:12which is kind of a larger place. And then for some reason bought Warner Brothers. And now they're just,
41:18they own, they own, we all work for them. They could add the UN easily. They have
41:26so much money. Well, I, as I just said, we have like an open call, yeah, for candidates.
41:37Interviews start tomorrow. Uh, Madam President, such a pleasure, such an honor.
41:43General Assembly, I'm going to leave a bear box. Quick break. We'll be right back after this.
41:48Wait, are you going to do that?
41:50All right.
42:05That is our show for tonight. But before we go, we're going to check in with your host
42:08for the rest of the week, Mr. Michael Costa. Michael. Thanks, John.
42:14Tell the people, uh, what are you working on this week?
42:17John, I'll be looking at the $250 million lawsuit that Kash Patel just filed against the Atlantic
42:23magazine for an article about his drinking. Wow. I, you know what? I had just heard about that.
42:27Is that, is there truth to that? Does he have a drinking problem? Yeah, he's got a drinking problem.
42:31He drinks like a soft ass bitch. You hang out with him socially? Yeah. And every time it's the same.
42:47You know, I'll be seven martinis deep and he's still nursing a green apple white claw like he's
42:51planning on driving home. I bet he's never even woken up in a pile of his own chunk. What a
42:57loser, John.
43:02Michael, I, obviously, I hate to say this, but it seems like maybe you drink a little too much.
43:07I will sue you for $250 million. You better lawyer up, asshole. I can do this all week.
43:14Well, aren't you hosting this week? What? I am? Yes. Michael Costa, everybody.
43:21You're the host. Have you been negotiating a lot all day? I mean, is that why your voice is hoarse?
43:26I've been screaming at Iranians all day, yes. A little bit of a laryngitis because of my,
43:32I've been screaming at Iranians. So the Iran leadership you're screaming at?
43:36You know why? You know why? Because that's the only thing they understand.
43:39They don't understand being nice. Sorry.
43:43you know why?
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