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Half Man - Season 1 Episode 1
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tele: https://t.me/TopFilmUSA1
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00:26This is a production of WGBH.
00:53I'm not speaking about this.
00:58You don't have to speak.
01:00You have to listen.
01:03Really?
01:06You picked today.
01:09My fucking wedding.
01:16Come on, Truman, stop messing.
01:21Put your top back on.
01:34Oh, fuck's sake.
01:46Oh, Nile.
01:53Come here.
01:55Come here.
02:02I'm proud of you, yeah?
02:05You know that?
02:13You look gorgeous, so you do.
02:15I'd tell you, if I wasn't family, I'd get up and underneath that kilt right away.
02:20Ruben, don't.
02:21What?
02:22I'm telling you you look gorgeous.
02:24Come on, show me.
02:24There's nothing to show, Ruben.
02:25I've got boxes on underneath, for Christ's sake.
02:27Oh, boxers.
02:28Stop teasing me, you little mate.
02:33Oh, hey.
02:34Yeah, come here.
02:35Look at me.
02:36Look at me.
02:38That's it.
02:41Look at me.
02:42Mm-hmm.
02:43Hey.
02:44We might not flow through each other's veins, but we flow through each other's brains.
02:49You get me?
02:50Please, I don't think that...
02:50One more time, eh?
02:52For all time's sake.
02:54I just need to hear it.
02:57Before I lose you forever.
02:58You're not serious.
03:01Go on.
03:02Say it.
03:03What am I?
03:08Your brother from...
03:16You're not a lover.
03:21You're not a lover.
03:23Beautiful.
03:36No!
03:51Come on.
03:53Give us your best, you little fag.
04:04What is this now?
04:06Oh, fucking stickers.
04:09Indiana Jones.
04:12That film is gay as fuck.
04:14I'm gonna have these.
04:16No, please.
04:17Gus.
04:18You're fucked.
04:20You can keep one.
04:22Okay?
04:23I'm not a monster.
04:25Pick one.
04:29Second to last.
04:30Good.
04:33Oh, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho.
05:00Okay, degenerate.
05:01Settle down.
05:02Settle down.
05:05All right.
05:07As we know, the prelim exams start this week.
05:10Are we aware of how important they are?
05:16Prelims are your safety net.
05:18For whatever reason, you missed your finals.
05:21You get hit by a bus.
05:22You come down with a bubonic plague.
05:24These exams are your get out of jail with an appeals card.
05:28Have I emphasized their importance enough?
05:34Positively spellbinding.
05:36Right, moving on.
05:39I should probably make you aware that a new student will be joining the class from tomorrow.
05:43One Reuben Pallister.
05:46What?
05:49Something about it, Kennedy?
05:52No, it's just...
05:53Did you just say Reuben Pallister?
05:58That's right.
05:59A new pupil you can show off your sparkling personality to.
06:04Reuben will be transferring from Pullman Young Offenders Institute, and will be re-sitting two years, which means he'll be
06:11a little more feral than the rest of you.
06:13Any questions?
06:17Nobody.
06:18Good.
06:18Open your jars.
06:19We'll pick up where we left off here for a bit.
06:22Page 16.
06:26Kennedy.
06:27Did you listen to what I just said?
06:30What?
06:30Yeah.
06:31Of course.
06:33What did I just say then?
06:37Reuben's back.
06:50Mum, it's Niall.
06:52Honey, I'm working.
06:52What is it?
06:53It's Reuben.
06:54He's out.
06:54He's coming to school.
06:55Look, now is not the time, all right?
06:57He's not staying with us, is he?
06:58We can talk about this when I pick you up.
07:00But, Mum...
07:21You should have said about Reuben.
07:22Oh, piss yourself!
07:24You're a 15-year-old boy.
07:26Given your life, I don't need to give you respect.
07:32Look, I'm sorry, okay?
07:35I should have told you.
07:37I'm keeping with the theme of surprises.
07:39He's moved into your room.
07:42What?
07:42No way.
07:43What did you think that second bed was for?
07:44We were almost begging you to ask.
07:46I thought it was for guests.
07:47He is a guest.
07:48No, he's not.
07:49He's a psycho.
07:50He bites someone's nose off.
07:51I've seen the guy too.
07:52It's horrible.
07:53His wife left him and everything.
08:03Look, you're not to talk about this, okay?
08:05Nobody in this town knows about that.
08:07The last thing that boy needs is folk whispering.
08:09Don't bite people's noses off then.
08:11No, shh.
08:11You're not to speak this way in front of Maura, all right?
08:13Oh, you always put her first.
08:15She was only supposed to be living with us for six months,
08:17and now her kid is moving in.
08:18Come on, Mum.
08:19He's a psycho.
08:21Her son getting out is a big deal.
08:23He's been away for two years.
08:24For Christ's sake.
08:25This is happening, Niall, so get used to it.
08:28Come on, Mum.
08:33Come on, Mum.
08:39Come on, Mum.
08:40I don't know.
09:22Remember me, Bambi?
09:24Last time I saw you, you were about yea high.
09:33Grown at least two feet since then, maybe more.
09:36You've got the exact same size head, though.
09:39Creeping me out a bit.
09:46You helping or what?
09:48We can't have this shit up.
09:50I'm off for bringing Buds home.
09:51Yeah.
09:56Get to it then, Bambi.
09:58Grab a bag, get stuff in.
10:07Yeah.
10:08Take that poster down and put this up.
10:26Put it up then, you dick.
10:27Put it up then, you dick.
10:54What the fuck are you staring at?
10:58What?
11:00Nothing.
11:24Ah!
11:26Looks like Palace does a no-show.
11:28Off to a great start.
11:31All right, everyone.
11:32Open your jotters.
11:33We'll pick up from yesterday.
11:44Right, what's going on here?
11:49Kennedy.
11:52Open your jotter.
11:55No.
11:57Open, boy.
12:06Who did this?
12:08Own up.
12:09Come on.
12:13Er...
12:14Me, sir.
12:15You?
12:16You called your own mum a dyke?
12:18No.
12:19I called someone else's mum a dyke.
12:21Really?
12:22I know first hand from your essays.
12:24Your grasp of irony isn't that strong.
12:28So come on.
12:29Who did this?
12:34My mum is not a lesbian.
12:36I beg your pardon?
12:37I said my mum is not a fucking lesbian.
12:44Come with me.
12:45Go off me, you nods!
12:47What did you say?
12:48Like to touch young boys, do you?
12:50You fucking old poof!
12:53I'm just wondering if there's something else we should be worrying about.
12:56What are you insinuating?
12:57All I'm saying is I've seen a change in Niall recently.
13:00And what change is that then?
13:01Well, he's gone from being a committed, gifted student to one that acts out in most lessons.
13:05Say it.
13:05Go on.
13:06I know you want to.
13:07Well, we have to call into question Niall's rather unusual state of affairs at home.
13:10You don't know anything about my damn home.
13:14I'm just kidding.
13:16I'm just kidding.
13:18I'm just kidding.
13:19I'm just kidding.
13:26I'm just kidding.
13:29I'm just kidding.
13:30I'm just kidding.
13:31You fucking fucking bastard here!
13:35Boy, Ruth!
13:37I know you're up there!
13:38What?
13:40I've been sitting about by a muck all day, waiting.
13:45Is that your dad?
13:46Shut the fuck up.
13:47I'll wait no cunts, hear me?
13:50God, get me.
13:53I'm not a muck.
13:55I'm not these fucking muck.
13:57You get down here and explain why you're staying with that dink.
14:03And not me.
14:05You man, son.
14:07We're just there again, eh?
14:09I think you can give your old man a big hug, eh?
14:15I don't think I can see you, boy.
14:18Please see me in the fucking tunnel.
14:20We've had to go on.
14:22I'll get, I'll get mine.
14:23I'll move with a bitch, we do.
14:26Don't shoot her.
14:27Fucking deal.
14:31Not a word, okay?
14:33Not a fucking word.
14:38God, I can't be through me.
14:39Don't shoot.
14:40Shut your mouth.
14:41Fuck.
14:42You don't tell anyone about this.
14:44They understand.
14:45This never happened.
14:47Fuck.
14:48Fuck.
14:50Fuck.
14:51Fuck.
14:52Fuck.
14:53Fuck.
14:56Fuck.
14:58Fuck.
14:59Fuck.
15:00Fuck.
15:02Fuck.
15:03No!
15:33No!
16:16So, boys. I am not sure whether you heard all that commotion last night.
16:28No, we were asleep. Both of us.
16:34Oh, right. Well, that's okay then. Ignore me.
16:59Fuck you staring up.
17:02Just seeing if you're all right.
17:04Why wouldn't I be?
17:05It's just last night.
17:06Fuck last night.
17:08Oh, yeah. Absolutely. Fuck last night.
17:18Are you nervous, or...?
17:20How the fuck would I be nervous?
17:21Well, first day of school.
17:23This is Dalkenny. This is where the fairies go.
17:25Oi! Soft cock!
17:27Are you a boyfriend?
17:30Ignore them.
17:32Are these guys bothering you, Bambi?
17:33Nah, it's just banter.
17:35Big after your Monday, you little faggot!
17:38Great banter.
17:42Are these guys bothering you, Bambi?
17:46I'll ask you again.
17:48Are these guys bothering you?
18:00Is that a knife?
18:01Go to school.
18:02What?
18:02Go to school. You're not a witness if you don't see what happens.
18:04Like, just fucking go.
18:40And at the heart of this relentless conflict...
18:43Lies a love story.
18:47Ah, Mr. Pallister.
18:49Nice of you to fit us into your busy schedule.
18:52Boys and girls, this is Reuben.
18:54Reuben will be joining us from now on.
18:59Where's your school uniform?
19:00On your mother's floor.
19:02That's enough, everyone.
19:06Desk at the back.
19:10And for the record, my mum's dead.
19:12So extra points for nihilism.
19:20Right.
19:21As I was saying, two households like families.
19:25Both in a bit of feud.
19:27Cuts.
19:31I'm not sick.
19:32I'm not sick.
19:35I'm not sick.
19:39Oh, no.
19:42I'm sick, ma'am.
19:43Dab josh.
19:44I'm sick.
20:00I'm sick with my mum.
20:01Nihil certainly has then there's only an inch of space when I cut my hand around his bicep used to
20:07be at least two
20:08three maybe
20:09I'm going to my room
20:10No don't
20:12Sit down you little killjoy
20:23We need you to persuade Rabin to go to the exam tomorrow
20:27What? No way
20:28Nihil please do this for us
20:31What are you doing?
20:32I'm being here
20:34Stop that I'm not a kid
20:35That's exactly what you are
20:36Get off me
20:37Oh come on do this for me
20:39Get off, get off
20:40Nihil I need you to do this come on
20:42Please
20:43Get off me
20:44Come on just this one thing
20:46Oh please
20:47I said get off me
20:57I'll take it from you
21:07Okay
21:09That
21:11You're a fairly sizable mess fire on our part
21:17She's making all the effort in the world
21:18I don't care
21:20We're not friends
21:21We never will be
21:23Come on
21:23Fancy the pants off of her when you were a wee in
21:27Remember the love letters we'd send to her house on Valentine's Day
21:34Fine
21:35Playtime's over
21:39Look will you speak to him at least
21:41No
21:42Look he's terrifying
21:43Oh come on Nihil
21:45You wouldn't believe how hard Mora had to work to get Rabin into Dalkenny
21:48She changed her postcodes and everything
21:52He's on probation too so he needs to show up and pass this prelim
21:55For the school will kick him out
22:23Cuz the truck has gone um
22:25Never said no very much
22:26Say never
22:27Never
22:27Never
22:28Ever
22:29Never
22:29Administraditions
22:34Things are going redけれforth to what I never said
22:36Till me mouth becomes dev
22:37Which ain't nature
22:38Not all that
22:40Clever
22:43And it's not as a one thing
22:45Nor another
22:46Arther
22:47And neither
22:47Is anything I haven't said
22:49Whatever
22:54What do you mean?
22:56Am I speaking foreign?
22:57Dance. Sorry, dance.
22:58You tell anyone about this I will put you to sleep. Do you understand?
23:01I won't.
23:02I mean, I thought it was great.
23:04Thought it was great.
23:06I thought it was great.
23:07I'm not.
23:30What do you want?
23:32Just a quick something that's come to me just now, in the moment.
23:39I was thinking about the exam tomorrow.
23:41Fuck off.
23:42Right you are.
24:10Your dad?
24:18What about him?
24:21How old were you again?
24:26I was eight.
24:28When I died.
24:32What did he do again?
24:39He was a writer.
24:41Are you?
24:43I don't remember that.
24:45Well, he worked in a pub mainly, but...
24:47he wanted to be a writer.
24:50And what did he write about?
24:55Working in a pub.
25:04He was really good though.
25:06I've read all his stuff.
25:08He was so close to getting published in the end.
25:10What stopped him?
25:13My own.
25:16Death.
25:30That's why I want to give it a shot myself, you know.
25:32You're right too.
25:34I'd like to keep a diary.
25:36That doesn't count.
25:37Try sending that to Anne Frank.
25:39Who?
25:41No, she was just...
25:45No, it doesn't matter.
25:56What happened to Gus?
26:02He'll survive.
26:07I just thought with the knife you'd done something, you know, really bad.
26:15Almost did.
26:17And I'm up against the wall with it, guppy and like mad.
26:21I whispered,
26:22I whispered,
26:23it'll be over soon.
26:25So he thought for a second I was going to stick it in him proper.
26:29It'll be over soon.
26:34I love seeing that.
26:37You really get a sense of what a cunt looks like when they think they're going to die.
26:42You sort of infant like.
26:44It's all innocent and shit is weird.
26:48It'll be over soon.
27:00Night, Bumpers.
27:04Night.
27:05Night.
27:05Night.
27:07Night.
27:08Night.
27:11Night.
27:14Night.
27:15Oh!
27:17Where's your bulldog now eh?
27:18Goss!
27:19Look, don't you tell us where Goss is.
27:20I don't know.
27:21I know you love with that unbred prick.
27:22You're bound to have said something.
27:23We don't talk.
27:25No.
27:25Go.
27:27Oi!
27:42Leave me alone.
27:43Leave me alone.
28:40Let's smoke this son of a bitch!
28:42Woo!
28:43Woo!
28:44Come on!
28:45Come on!
28:45Pallister.
28:46Nice of you to join.
28:47Please refrain from shouting out.
28:49It's only prelims.
28:50Where am I sitting?
28:51There's an empty chair there.
28:53Two rows along.
28:54Please move quietly.
28:55Hey, my God.
28:55No, I'm sorry.
29:00You're right.
29:01Yeah.
29:17You're the only one I hope to do with.
29:19You're the only one I hope to do with.
29:39All right, guys. We have ten minutes left.
29:42Ten minutes? Get fucked.
29:43Language, Pallister.
29:45I started later than everyone.
29:46Well, I'm afraid the onus is on you there.
29:48Piss off, Jenkins. I shagged your mum in her onus.
29:53Pallister, get back here.
29:57Pallister, don't you walk away from me, son.
29:59Oi, I'm speaking to you.
30:21Pallister, don't you walk away from me.
30:31All right, guys, not long now.
31:17The school fund.
31:18Oh, Jesus. What now?
31:21Ruben passed.
31:23He passed the prelim.
31:26He can stay in school now.
31:29Oh, really?
31:31Yeah.
31:34You helped him, didn't you?
31:36Oh, no, I...
31:38Last night, I heard you talking.
31:45I mean that.
31:49I know we haven't always seen it eye to eye.
31:52Mainly because you're a little brat who blames me for everything.
31:56I do think you could be a positive influence on my boy.
32:04Thanks.
32:07I think.
32:15Nah, that feels weird.
32:19Let's never do that again.
32:29All right.
32:40Oh, my God.
32:45Oh, my God.
32:50I've got to keep it down. Bambi's sleeping.
33:03Isn't it a bit weird doing this with the wee Nile in the room?
33:06I don't care. I passed the prelims today and I did it in a speck of the time every other
33:10fucker.
33:11Stop it, Ruben. If I swear anymore, I'm going to put my back out.
33:14Shh! Put it down.
33:16I thought you said you didn't care about him hearing.
33:18I don't. I just don't want my mum rubbing one out all week.
33:23Yeah, take these off. I want to feel your skin on the skin.
33:27Oh, baby.
33:47Get here, you.
33:49Oh, baby.
33:51Oh, baby.
33:59Oh, baby.
34:12Oh.
34:12Fuck off. We saw you.
34:14I wasn't. I was sleeping.
34:15Liar. At least admit it, you little scrote. You were perving.
34:19Pervy little Niall Kennedy, eh?
34:23So, tell me.
34:26Did you see anything that you liked?
34:33Quite something, huh?
34:35Is this the first time you've seen a naked woman?
34:40In the flesh.
34:44And what do you think?
34:49She looks...
34:50What would you do to her, Niall, if you could have your way?
34:56Go on.
34:59I would... I'd ask her for her permission.
35:03Obviously.
35:04Fucking loser, aren't you, Bambi?
35:06Touch my breath, Niall.
35:08What?
35:08I'd ask her for her.
35:10Huh?
35:22Here.
35:23Let's see how he's getting on, shall we?
35:26What?
35:26No, no, no, no.
35:27Wait, wait, wait, wait.
35:27No, no, no, no, no.
35:28That's fine, Bambi.
35:29Just relax, okay?
35:31Let her do her thing.
35:47Wow.
35:49Nothing.
35:50What's going on?
35:51You got something against Mona?
35:52Is it my boobs?
35:53What?
35:54No, it's just, this isn't how I pictured it.
35:57Well, how did you picture it, then?
35:58More than one woman.
36:01That's it, isn't it?
36:03Niall here loves group sex.
36:05No, no, I don't.
36:06Oh, little Niall Kennedy loves a bit of group sex.
36:10Well, I could assume different characters, if you like.
36:14I could be Candy, a blonde bombshell who lives next door.
36:19Or I could be Svetlana, Russian warrior of the north.
36:27She's incredible, isn't she, now?
36:29Definitely, keep her.
36:31Uh-uh.
36:31Svetlana is kept by no one.
36:34How's he getting on now, then?
36:37Come on, son.
36:38I got full marks on my stante grates back in the day, Niall.
36:41I know you love a nerd.
36:45Here.
36:47Just focus on how things feel.
36:49Pickle your finger.
37:02Oh, hello.
37:03Here we go, my man.
37:06You ready?
37:10You ready?
37:16You ready?
37:33Easy, boy.
37:36Easy.
37:36Steady, steady.
37:40Drop.
37:42Don't gallop.
37:46Oh, wow.
37:47He's a grower, young Niall.
37:53Oh.
37:57Sorry.
37:58Back you go, mister.
38:00No, no, no, wait.
38:00Stop fighting.
38:02Let her do her thing.
38:04Here.
38:05I'll hold her a break.
38:06What?
38:16Hold her, son.
38:18Hold her.
38:20Hold her.
38:21Hold her my rhythm.
38:41Wow, he's really going for a night.
39:09For fuck's sake, did you just call me me?
39:13You fucking did, you mink!
39:15Oh, no, for my feet are all.
39:17Now, son, you need to pull out.
39:18For fuck's sake, I better not be pregnant.
39:20I'm sorry, I didn't mean to.
39:21It just came out of nowhere.
39:23Relax, son, it's fine.
39:25But, I mean, like, what happens now?
39:28Will I get the virus?
39:32What?
39:36Do you mean AIDS?
39:51I'll lie back, you daft cunt.
40:00So, is that it then?
40:05That's it, Bambi.
40:28I'll lie back, babe.
40:33Okay.
40:54I was just thinking, do you have any hash?
41:06We can bake Niall Kennedy, dark horse, my man.
41:18Niall Kennedy, eh?
41:21Sex God, drug fiend.
42:02I was just thinking, do you have any other hand?
42:03I was thinking, do you have any other hand?
42:14Well, I get the virus.
42:18Oh, I feel like an idiot.
42:22No, you're good.
42:26I know what you did.
42:29As in?
42:31There you go.
42:32Oh.
42:37I've never seen her look at me like that before.
42:42I've seen her cry loads.
42:47You know, but...
42:53I like this.
42:55It works.
43:03What did you make a moaner, then?
43:05Yeah, I liked her.
43:06Yeah, you fucking did.
43:09You can thank me when you're ready.
43:13Someone had to lose your virginity for you, didn't they?
43:17Oh, come on.
43:19You didn't think that was chance, did you?
43:22There's no way a lassie would take time out from sleeping with me to sleep with you.
43:27I set it up.
43:29My way of saying thanks.
43:37So, come on.
43:38Tell me you loved it.
43:42I loved it.
43:45Yeah, you did.
43:49I should run a brothel or something.
43:51I'm like the Pied Piper of pussy.
43:55Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
43:59I don't know.
44:34The Pied Piper are busy.
44:39I'm imagining these massive vaginas with legs following you around.
44:51You're a minger, papi.
45:16Can I ask you something?
45:18Do you know what?
45:22Are our mums, you know, fucking...
45:31Yeah, I'm afraid so.
45:36Does it bother you or something?
45:40No, they're not really.
45:43As long as they're happy, I guess.
45:47Although they don't seem all that happy.
45:55There's a lot you don't know about.
45:56There's a lot you don't know about.
46:10Here.
46:12Got you something.
46:20I'm not going to train you.
46:22Just in case something happens to me, I need to know you'll look after yourself.
46:28Why do you care?
46:32We're family now.
46:35It's the most important thing.
46:39My brother from another lover.
46:48Come on, boys.
46:50School.
46:51Bring those thin bags down while you're at it.
46:56This is going to be some morning.
46:58We'll be floating to school after all that.
47:05Hey.
47:09You've got nothing to worry about with our mums.
47:12Ten years' time, you'll be at a party somewhere and realise it makes you more interesting.
47:23Later, Bambas.
47:35Bye.
48:02Just cause I ain't never had no nothing worth having
48:05Never, ever, never, ever
48:12You ain't got no call not to think of what I'm falling
48:15To thinking I ain't too clever
48:23And it ain't not having one thing nor not another
48:25Rather neither is it anything
48:28Whatever
48:33And it's not, not knowing that there ain't nothing showing
48:36And I ask it to the name of Trevor
48:41However
48:46Knock me down with a feather
48:51Clever Trevor
48:56White brows wonder whether clever Trevor's clever
49:05No, neither haven't not got no right to make a clock out of Trevor
49:16Oh, no, neither if she walks away from me
49:27Tell kor alsje
49:27That's working WordPress
49:28Sort of heavy
49:31In the name of Trevor
49:34Oh, yeah
49:41I know
49:41I know
49:41I know
49:41How's your name?
50:01One more, Bambi.
50:02Here, have a sip.
50:06Come on.
50:16Hey, easy.
50:18Sip, don't chug.
50:20Come on.
50:21That's it.
50:31Jesus.
50:33You're dripping.
50:37Let's sort this out.
50:40We'll stay here.
50:42All right.
50:44Hey, it's going to be okay.
50:48You're going to be fine.
50:51Hey.
50:52Hey, it's going to be all right.
50:54Don't, hey, come on.
50:56Nile, please, no.
50:58Hey, hey, settle, settle.
51:00Sell.
51:01Don't do the fire, sell.
51:02No, no, no, no, settle, settle.
51:04Just breathe.
51:05Hey.
51:06Hey.
51:07It's fine.
51:08All right, it's fine.
51:09Just settle a bit.
51:10Sell.
51:12Here.
51:13Follow my breath.
51:19There's no following my breath.
51:21I can't.
51:22Follow it.
51:22I can't.
51:23Try.
51:23Yes, you can.
51:24You fucking can.
51:25Come on.
51:26Come on, follow it.
51:49Hey.
51:50Hey.
51:56I said go with it, go with it, no, no, that's it, that's it boy, just breathe, okay, I'm here
52:05for you, just keep breathing, that's it, that's it boy, don't worry, it'll be over soon.
52:26Breathe.
52:56We'll see you then.
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