Fourth assessment/review with Psychiatrist @ Hillmorton Hospital
Dr. Benjamin McBreen
My name is Nigel McFall. I have repeatedly asked mental health professionals at Hillmorton Hospital to look at my evidence – specifically, that I solved the codes. They refuse. They shut me down without even glancing at what I've done.
Instead, they take away my medication, call me delusional, and ask leading questions designed to make me say whatever fits their diagnosis. But I'm the only one making sense.
The truth is clear in every interview: I do not meet the legal requirements to be sectioned under the Mental Health Act.
This is not a story of madness. This is a story of a public mental health service that cannot tell the difference between high neurodivergent IQ and illness. When a mind works differently – faster, deeper, more pattern-driven – they label it as psychosis. When you present evidence they don't understand, they call it a delusion.
Their inability to recognise high intelligence, lateral thinking, and code-breaking as traits of neurodivergence – not madness – is a systemic failure. And it is causing real harm.
#SectionedUnlawfully
#PsychiatryFailsNeurodivergence
#LeadingQuestionsNotCare
#MHA1992FailedMe
#MentalHealthActNZ
#StopIgnoringEvidence
#MentalHealthReformNZ
#PatientsRightsMatter
#SecondOpinionNow
#AdvocacyOverSedation
#NoJusticeNoHealth
Dr. Benjamin McBreen
My name is Nigel McFall. I have repeatedly asked mental health professionals at Hillmorton Hospital to look at my evidence – specifically, that I solved the codes. They refuse. They shut me down without even glancing at what I've done.
Instead, they take away my medication, call me delusional, and ask leading questions designed to make me say whatever fits their diagnosis. But I'm the only one making sense.
The truth is clear in every interview: I do not meet the legal requirements to be sectioned under the Mental Health Act.
This is not a story of madness. This is a story of a public mental health service that cannot tell the difference between high neurodivergent IQ and illness. When a mind works differently – faster, deeper, more pattern-driven – they label it as psychosis. When you present evidence they don't understand, they call it a delusion.
Their inability to recognise high intelligence, lateral thinking, and code-breaking as traits of neurodivergence – not madness – is a systemic failure. And it is causing real harm.
#SectionedUnlawfully
#PsychiatryFailsNeurodivergence
#LeadingQuestionsNotCare
#MHA1992FailedMe
#MentalHealthActNZ
#StopIgnoringEvidence
#MentalHealthReformNZ
#PatientsRightsMatter
#SecondOpinionNow
#AdvocacyOverSedation
#NoJusticeNoHealth
Category
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CreativityTranscript
00:18How do you think it would be going if you took ADHD meds from someone who had ADHD?
00:27I know you're really struggling with that and I'm sorry about that but we can't be starting
00:33those medications at the moment.
00:36It takes away my ability to advocate for myself.
00:40I can't think.
00:44I understand that and it's really difficult for you.
00:48You can just talk to me straight.
00:56You sent me some emails again.
00:59Yeah.
01:00I just want a second opinion.
01:04What have you got wanting a second opinion about?
01:08About what I'm saying.
01:11Because when I listen back to all the other sessions, all you do is talk about yourself
01:15or you guide questions to get the answer you need to take a box.
01:23You're not looking at this.
01:27You've got a huge bias.
01:29Because you work in a situation where you mostly come across unwell people, your bias
01:33is towards unwell people and you're completely missing who I am.
01:39I don't.
01:41For you?
01:43I'm just trying to figure out what I'm missing.
01:46Well, I'm neurodivergent.
01:47I've got a high IQ and I can solve these codes.
01:51It's not difficult to understand.
01:53And I'm not disputing that you have a high IQ and I'm not disputing that you're neurodivergent.
01:59You've told me many times that process about this, I have this grand, what is it?
02:03Can I say a word you use?
02:04A grandiose idea that I'm intelligent.
02:10You've said it the whole way through.
02:11I've listened back on all the recordings.
02:14Look, there have been times where we've been concerned about some sort of grandiose statements
02:19that you've made.
02:20Why would you be concerned?
02:24Why?
02:25At any point of this, if you actually thought to yourself,
02:28maybe not just really intelligent and get something.
02:32Have you ever thought about that?
02:34I've thought about that.
02:36And how did you weigh that up?
02:38How did I weigh it up?
02:40What did you use?
02:43I used my rationality, I suppose.
02:50You've never looked at the evidence in full.
02:53I've had a look at the information that you've sent through.
02:57I've had a look at the other.
02:58You can't just look at pieces.
02:59It's fragmented.
03:00I've spoken to yourself.
03:02And Katha's had a look at the information as well.
03:06And everyone's on the same page that this information is taking up a lot of your brain space at the
03:12moment.
03:12No, it's not.
03:13That's great.
03:14I can't even think at the moment.
03:17You caused that.
03:18I was well before.
03:20You're talking with ADHD medication, now it's probably.
03:23Have you been trying to break any codes where you've been in hospital?
03:25I can't think.
03:29I can't think.
03:30All I can do is try and put something on Facebook so someone might be able to see me and
03:34get me out of this night.
03:35I still haven't quite figured out what these codes are pointing towards.
03:41This is the thing.
03:42This is what you do.
03:44You try and direct the conversation to this massive great big thing.
03:48Because I'm a systems thinker, yeah, I capture a lot of stuff.
03:50Because that's what you use to label me because it's crazy.
03:53What I'm saying, sit down with me.
03:56I'll show you step by step at the start how it works.
03:58It's all rule based.
03:59Yep.
04:00There's no magic here, mister.
04:02That's me.
04:02Okay.
04:02There's no magic.
04:04And then you'll start to see it.
04:07Unless your voice is so bad that you think, well, I'm just going to make them sick regardless.
04:11But you'll see.
04:12You'll be able to see what I do.
04:14It's a progression.
04:16But my data doesn't come along me.
04:18It comes from all data.
04:19So you talk to us about what you've been thinking and what you've discovered.
04:23I'm more than happy to listen.
04:25No, because it's just a waste of conversation.
04:28Because what you're trying to do, this is how you operate.
04:31You're trying to get me to go about this whole big old thing here that sounds crazy.
04:36So you can use it on me to sound crazy.
04:40So then you don't have to sit down with me and actually understand me.
04:43So I'm not going to go, I'm not playing a game.
04:44I'm here sitting down with you trying to understand me.
04:47No, I know your game.
04:48Okay.
04:49I've got ADHD.
04:50I can read you like a book.
04:51Okay.
04:53I've listened to all the recordings a couple of times.
04:56I understand how you operate.
04:57And I'm just not, I'm not falling into your trap.
05:00Okay.
05:01The reality is, you've never sat down with me.
05:03You've never tried to understand me.
05:05I'm doing that right now.
05:06No, no.
05:07One on one, understand me.
05:08Right from the start.
05:10Even at the start, they should have got to understand me first before they section me.
05:14They go through the evidence.
05:16Okay.
05:16If they wanted to section me, they could do it the next day.
05:18I'm trying to understand you and I do.
05:20No, you're not.
05:21You've made no effort.
05:23Okay.
05:23I've listened to all the recordings many times.
05:25You haven't made any effort.
05:27All you're doing is trying to reach conclusions that you want to reach.
05:32Tell me the information that I need to get understanding.
05:36Well, you need to sit down with me.
05:38Do I go through everything?
05:39Yeah.
05:39Watch my two, watch my two our video.
05:41Yeah.
05:42Look, I've seen.
05:42In full.
05:42I've seen.
05:43In full.
05:45In full.
05:46I'm happy to sit down with you.
05:48We're doing that now.
05:50No.
05:51What I'm saying about it is one on one and it will take hours.
05:54It will take hours to go through.
05:57Look, unfortunately.
05:57And you want to say, well, I don't have time.
05:59At the end of the day, I don't have hours to sit down, but I've got, you know, in the
06:04next 20 minutes, I'm more than welcome here.
06:06But I can't.
06:07This is the point.
06:07I can't think.
06:09This is what you've done.
06:11You've put me in a state where I can't think.
06:12I can't educate myself.
06:14I can't even explain things to people right now because I can't think.
06:18There's no way out for me.
06:21I'm stuck.
06:22You're doing a very good job advocating for yourself at the moment.
06:25I'm not just because I'm more angry than anything else.
06:27And you're good at explaining yourself.
06:28If I get angry, then I get adrenaline.
06:32You seem very articulate and able to explain yourself.
06:34Oh, well, am I intelligent now?
06:37What?
06:38I've listened to your recordings every time you said I'm not.
06:40I'm not disagreeing with that.
06:42Well, you have in the past.
06:44I mean, your inconsistency is concerning me.
06:48Okay.
06:49That's why I think I'd better get a second opinion from someone.
06:52Okay.
06:52Well, I'll see what I can do.
06:54We're a little bit stretched with a psychiatrist at the moment.
06:58You just need one that understands what pattern recognition is.
07:00But I have the same opinion as the clinician who admitted you.
07:05Okay.
07:06So what you're saying is there's just a huge bias.
07:09It doesn't matter who I see in here, they all cycle with each other.
07:11There's no independent thought.
07:12Is that what you're saying?
07:13That's not what I'm saying.
07:14What is that?
07:15No, you're just saying.
07:15I'm saying that me and the admitting clinician have the same opinion.
07:19So you talk on whatever narrative they've provided, and then you've carried on with that narrative
07:23they haven't had.
07:24Without any extra thought, independent thought.
07:28No.
07:28Anytime anyone's admitted, we think about it independently and think, is this appropriate?
07:33Is this information correct?
07:35Does this formulation make sense?
07:36That's what we do for everyone.
07:37But you side with them, mate.
07:40You don't think about anything else.
07:42We do respect our colleagues' opinions.
07:46Bias.
07:47You can call that bias.
07:49I respect the opinion of the clinician who has mentioned you.
07:53There's been no issue to understand me.
07:55At all.
07:55And I'm here to understand you.
07:57No, you're not.
07:58Stop lying.
07:59Okay.
07:59I mean, don't say something that you're not doing.
08:01But you're...
08:02Because if you would try to understand me, a week ago, you would have sat down with me
08:07for a few hours, I would have explained it to me, to you, and you would have gone,
08:10Oh, great.
08:10I can see how it does.
08:11I can see it now.
08:13You're not crazy.
08:14You don't need those jokes.
08:14We'll just put you back on your medication.
08:16You're going to have a stellar life.
08:18And the medication that you're on doesn't indicate that you're crazy.
08:22It just means that you've been making some connections between things that we don't
08:27think are connected, but...
08:28But they are.
08:29And...
08:29Look, there's not many drugs you give me.
08:31I'm going to tell you that.
08:32I want to know how they're connected, but you're not willing to talk about that.
08:34Like I said, sit down with me for a few hours and I'll take you through it.
08:38Okay.
08:39Look, I...
08:39This isn't like a five minute deal or something.
08:42This is not sort of, you know, fast food for psychology, psychiatry.
08:46Tell us as much as you can at the moment.
08:48I can't think.
08:49You've taken away my ADHD medication.
08:51You're going around...
08:52Yes, because this is the situation you've created.
08:54Okay.
08:54You've created the situation.
08:57Okay?
08:58I can't think critically.
08:59I can't go into the details of how I do it now because I can't think.
09:03Any suicidal thoughts over the last couple of days?
09:06Oh, no.
09:06I'm not going to kill myself.
09:07I've got too much to give.
09:09I'm just going to get the hell out of here.
09:11Any thoughts about hurting anyone?
09:13No.
09:14Why would I hurt anyone?
09:15The only time I get...
09:16The only time I get upset is when my brain shuts down so much.
09:21And before, I used to get angry.
09:23I was really angry.
09:23Like, I would smash stuff up.
09:26And it was so bad.
09:27I hated it.
09:27It was like...
09:28I just hated it.
09:30But when I get like that, I'll tell people.
09:32And I know staff, they might say,
09:33Oops, guys.
09:37Telling us he's going to do something.
09:38But if I tell somebody I'm going to do it, I won't do it.
09:40And then I can probably get some medication.
09:42Just like I did today.
09:44Just zonk out.
09:45Get over that period.
09:46To get through it.
09:47Are you sleeping at night time?
09:49Oh, sometimes.
09:50But last night I couldn't sleep.
09:51It just depends.
09:52My brain's just like...
09:53It's so sore.
09:54Like it's...
09:54It's in distress.
09:56My brain's in distress.
09:57I'm in mental distress at the moment.
10:01Because, you know, I've got an ADHD diagnosis.
10:03And I should have had my medication.
10:05And you've taken them off me based on something that isn't even true.
10:09Have you ever had a scan of ADHD before?
10:11Yeah.
10:12Many.
10:13CTD scans?
10:14Yeah.
10:17When was the last time you had one of those scans?
10:21It was when I had a really bad concussion.
10:23That was what?
10:24Yeah.
10:24Like a while ago?
10:25Yeah.
10:26I don't know.
10:27I just had a look.
10:30Because there has to be something wrong with my brain, don't I?
10:32It can't be intelligent.
10:34It must be something else.
10:35No, it's just a good thing that we often do is do a brain scan just to make sure there's
10:39nothing physical going on.
10:40Nothing physical?
10:41I'll get my peak.
10:42Well, that's before I came here.
10:43You guys have made me sick.
10:53What would have been maybe 2017?
10:55Does that sound right?
10:56Yeah, probably.
10:58I don't know.
11:04Maybe an MRI scan.
11:13But I want to seek an opinion regardless.
11:18And I want some of my medication, a stimulant medication so that I can call Health and Disability
11:23Commissioner as well.
11:24Okay.
11:26We unfortunately can't start any stimulants for you, but you're welcome to call that.
11:29I can't.
11:30I can't think.
11:31I mean, are you listening?
11:33Yeah.
11:36So when am I going to get stimulant medication?
11:38So I'm not going to be able to make a court date, no?
11:42Do you want me to think?
11:46At this point in time, I wouldn't feel comfortable with you going to court because I don't think
11:51you'd be able to best represent yourself because of your unwellness.
11:57The unwellness that you created.
12:00So when am I going on stimulant medications?
12:04How long do I need to go before you're happy?
12:08Look, I don't think stimulants are something that you could be on in the near future.
12:12What do you mean?
12:14That given what's happened and that you've become really unwell on them.
12:18I haven't...
12:19There's a thing to keep the faulty pack there.
12:20You've never even got to understand me.
12:22Okay.
12:23Well, there you go.
12:24What you're doing is you're making up a narrative and then going with it.
12:28But it's baseless.
12:33With the medication at the moment, Nigel, I think we need to add in five milligrams of
12:38olanzapine in the morning.
12:40What's that?
12:41That's the medication that you're on.
12:45That's the anticycle of the medication.
12:47I mean, you're just fucking crazy.
12:52How do you actually sit there doing your job, harming people?
12:57Because I can see that even though you don't recognise it that you're unwell at the moment.
13:02I'm not unwell at all.
13:04No.
13:05I'm not unwell.
13:07You're building a completely fabricated narrative.
13:11But look, I just think we should leave things there today, Nigel, because I think we're
13:16just going around in circles.
13:18But I'm going to increase the olanzapine to five milligrams in the morning.
13:20Man, I'm guessing this is the only job you get after university.
13:23Yeah, no one has probably wanted you.
13:25I mean, you're not listening.
13:26You're not listening to me.
13:28Okay?
13:30I would want to understand you, Nigel.
13:32Then make an effort.
13:34Give me something so I can think, so I can speak for myself.
13:38And I'll see if we can get you a second opinion.
13:40Yeah, I want a second opinion.
13:42Outside of this place.
13:45We will only be able to provide you a second opinion from another staff and that works.
13:51That's fine.
13:52But I'm going to need stimulants to be able to think for the second opinion.
13:57You can't take the only thing that allows me to think and then try and explain myself
14:03to someone else.
14:05That doesn't work.
14:06Do you see the logic in that?
14:08Look, I think we should leave.
14:10No, no.
14:10Listen to me.
14:11Do you see the logic in that?
14:12I don't want to.
14:13No, no.
14:14I don't want to.
14:16Do you see the logic in this?
14:19Do you see how that doesn't work?
14:21Do you think?
14:22You take away the drug that stops me from, now I can't think.
14:26And now I have to get a second opinion at a time where I can't process thoughts.
14:30well look if you have that second opinion um they would want to see what you're like without
14:37that stimulant medication well that's the same for a week okay i can't function okay it doesn't
14:43no no stay there no no no i've told you many times okay since you've taken me off to that
14:49medication i can't function and you still think it's okay so is that what you want for me going
14:55forward to not be able to function is this is this your key i want you to be able to
15:00function well
15:01and i think the medication that we're providing you will help you to do that but it's not doing
15:05anything it's not doing anything but we'll leave this there you're like the most incompetent person
15:41you
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