- 2 hours ago
The Valley (2024) Season 3 Episode 1
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00:15This is Zack's nightmare.
00:18If I was married to you, I'd cheat on you, too.
00:21The way you're talking to her is making me feel very uncomfortable.
00:25I think I saw your uterus.
00:27Don't be scared you're going to end up like me, OK?
00:30Oh, my God.
00:30Oh, my God.
00:34This season on the Valley.
00:36My titties won't be here for long.
00:37The last little piece of Jack's gone.
00:40You have to worry about them swill from my titties.
00:43Kiss? Oh, no.
00:45Come on, baby.
00:46Wow, look at you guys building bars and then making them go out of business.
00:52I love you.
00:54Hey.
00:55Check, please.
00:56Who's going to kiss?
00:58Schwartz and Michelle.
00:59We could have a threesome tonight.
01:01Hold on.
01:02You're not officially divorced yet?
01:03Divorce me, please.
01:05Do it for me.
01:07I'm performative.
01:08She's performative?
01:11It's not allowed to be hard for both of us.
01:12It's only allowed to be hard for you.
01:14Because I don't you?
01:16You're not the only one going through this.
01:18I feel like it being really critical and it's really hard for me to function.
01:20No, it's not.
01:21I feel very out of control.
01:22I freaking hate it.
01:23It's a lot for me.
01:25I'm afraid I'm going to lose you guys over this .
01:28You're not going to lose Jesse over me.
01:29You're not going to lose Jesse over me.
01:29You're not going to lose Jesse over me.
01:31I'm so happy that we can be together and have a dream.
01:35Very emotionally mature.
01:36You.
01:37You.
01:37Oh, I lost the shoe.
01:39You.
01:39You.
01:39You.
01:42You.
01:43You.
01:45You.
01:47You.
01:49You.
01:49You.
01:49You.
01:50You.
02:09and breaking plans everything is sunshine good times nothing but blue what do you want to wear
02:21hold on we gotta brush your teeth do you want to wear this dinosaurs just like our bedroom
02:27it is a brand new year and a brand new me things are so much better than the last time
02:32that you
02:33saw me you gotta let go little shark i mean i'm really damn proud of myself i am paying for
02:40everything i'm doing everything physically i'm there for my son every single day you want to oatmeal bar
02:51it's not always easy jacks and i are still not divorced he still hasn't sent in all the paperwork
02:58but i'm hoping within like six weeks it will happen we gotta go bye-bye no cruise no this way
03:06i'm finally putting myself first i'm happy and it's about damn time goodness
03:21honey i'm home why is there hair in this i'm still in west hollywood i still haven't made the jump
03:27to
03:27valley and i don't think i ever will i like your haircut thanks that's cute it's my k-pop era
03:33the
03:34great part is my roommate's moving out and benji is soft moving in i do need to do my glp1
03:42i don't
03:43have to lie about how i lose weight but he's so small he doesn't take up much room basically like
03:47i get triple the closet space because i'm dating benji don't rub off too much my spray tan and i'm
03:54skinny again yay don't we have a step line we do but i'm just being difficult of course i think
04:05it's otherwise there we go melissa and i are still living together we moved into a new place
04:09in sherman oaks i can't believe that i'm living in the valley like we're actually getting married i
04:14love it excited i still have our tracker of things to do we're supposed to have a lot more done
04:19at this
04:19point i know i'm a little laid back bride okay i would say i'm just kind of go with the
04:24flow
04:25to get married i know a while it's gonna be black tie no kids there's gonna be sushi there's gonna
04:31be
04:31like a carving station we have this whole beautiful it's simple pretty i don't want anybody rolling up
04:36there with a hot pink dress i will literally stop the wedding and escort you out you're super laid back
04:42brother yeah i am laid back jesse wants to marry us he wants to be our officiant
04:55before dot com let's sage the house good energy get all the bad vibes i'm sorry come on i have
05:03my
05:03own place again and i'm like truly truly single aaron and i didn't work out have you ever been broken
05:10up with before actually it's the first time anyone has ever broken up with me i usually do the
05:16breaking up good vibes only hi honey bunny wait okay come she has a lot of energy apparently jesse and
05:30i split isabella we switch weekends when will the divorce be finalized i wish it was finalized two
05:37years ago when i first asked for a divorce but he just always has an excuse of why he can't
05:43sign
05:43the paperwork let's do it you two all right ready michelle for some reason thinks everything i do is
05:52strategic trust me i want to get divorced it just hasn't happened yet simple you're cheating i'm not
05:59cheating so easy moving on up moving on up moving on up right now
06:08i love you santa clarita
06:15who's mountain is that is that bucco mountain santa clarita is heaven it's our mountain there's a smile
06:24lord have mercy we got a new baby baby adelaide our number four hi happy girl we've taken the deep
06:32dive off into like the middle of nowhere i almost had a baby in the car thanks to the santa
06:37clarita move
06:37it took an hour to get to the hospital because we were so far away from our la hospital
06:42i do miss being closer to everything hey baby girl hello yay yay do you want a bottle by this
07:01not
07:01feeling it you don't know what you want we don't know either luke and i are still engaged and i've
07:08had a
07:08whole baby she's exactly what i manifested blonde hair blue eyes looks nothing like me
07:14my genetics did not try there we go you think the blowouts are because she's laying down or because
07:20the diaper's too small there'll be like nothing in the front and all the way up her back the biggest
07:24change in me since kaya i'm way less grossed out by poop than i used to be that's a good
07:31thing i guess
07:31this is a good thing to be more comfortable with feces on your hands you feel well rested how you
07:37feeling otherwise i don't know it's like i told you the other day i'm really good at being her
07:40mom i just don't know how to be anything else i just don't know how to be like a woman
07:45you know
07:46what i mean i think not being the best partner if we get a a good nanny everything else will
07:53like ease up kaya is our whole world we don't have time for anything else we don't have time for
08:00ourselves and we definitely don't have time for each other one of us has been with her every minute of
08:04every day so far i know you feel like we don't have a relationship i didn't say that there's
08:09definitely certain areas that are lacking that maybe weren't a year ago i miss having sex like
08:16i love chris and she's smoking hot like come on play it on me i'm gonna try harder with all
08:23of that
08:23normalcy just takes time yeah baby steps to get back to feeling like yourself because i don't know
08:30it's my first time i've done this too yeah yeah but we have this sip and see coming up
08:35so yeah that'll be a little different you know it's like the whole point is hard but
08:40it's overwhelming for me nia and i are throwing a sip and see together because our girls are only
08:46six days apart but i'm still so incredibly overwhelmed i mean like i haven't really left the house
08:53more than once since i had a baby
08:59she's sleeping
09:09i need to get kristen a gift what about this how cute is that kristen would love the dogs wouldn't
09:14she i feel like this tie-dye one's cute too i feel like i could see her in that
09:18i love a beige love a babe in beige i've known kristen for a long time she and i definitely
09:25have
09:26gone toes i'm the one person babe you don't want to go their way i'm really scared sit the down
09:35but she fights hard she loves hard she's very much my type of chick is it awkward that i'm like
09:42having you help me no i love all babies so like i want you to get them something cute and
09:47i'm
09:48honestly glad that i wasn't invited and put in the position where i have to not go yeah last summer
09:53was
09:53a good lesson for me i feel like she wants to stir the pot if your husband's going to a
09:59public bar
10:00getting blacked out and making women uncomfortable it's gonna get talked about i said out loud yes that
10:05he sexually assaulted jasmine hi i'll throw off the though it's been important to me to get in
10:11therapy to work on myself reflect on how i can be better and not have so much pain and drama
10:16in the
10:17group nia blocked me on everything she's made it pretty clear like she wants me to shut my mouth and
10:22like move on so i also feel like nia would rather paint me as a liar when she knows i'm
10:28not than to
10:29recognize the truth about what's happening with her husband do you think you could say i'm sorry
10:32that i went in so hard it was not my place
10:38i mean the only people coming to the sip and see are like very close friends it's not a ton
10:42of people
10:42like janet jason there's been no communication whatsoever which i mean like how can a friendship
10:47like repair when there's zero communication over the course of a year nope she is on too many
10:52of my friends yeah she kind of just doesn't exist to me the only time i've seen her for even
10:57a
10:58millisecond in the last year has been at britney's house that interaction at britney's was not great
11:06so i was like it went from oh kristen has a baby on her boob to ah kristen has a
11:10baby on her boob
11:11get me out of here as quick as i can britney had a pool party that she was gonna invite
11:15all the kids
11:16over for and like okay if kristen's there she's probably have a newborn with her she's gonna be
11:20sticking inside in the air conditioning we'll get there we'll change we'll go in the pool it probably
11:25won't even be that big of an issue britney told me that janet was 99 not going to come especially
11:31if she knew i was going to be there she was probably going to cancel and i shouldn't even
11:35worry about it and next thing i know janet shows up kristen's britney why is she here she doesn't
11:42deserve to be here took me a second to be like oh is she talking about me not doing not
11:47in front of my
11:48kid no my entire being told me like just leave get out of here so i just scooped cam grabbed
11:53our bag and
11:54turned around and walked away good i love that for you did britney step in when that happened or no
11:59she didn't say anything and then afterwards i was like i text her and i was just like what the
12:04like you you invite me over with my kid and then that happens you can't say like hey stop it
12:11we're
12:11talking about friendships that have been decades long of course when you have history with someone
12:17there's going to be good and bad let's focus on the good it's a tough situation i want peace but
12:25i
12:25don't want to stir stuff up and then have it be a big dramatic thing yeah i'm trying to have
12:30fun
12:30totally i've been chilling for two years playing mom covered in spit up and i want everyone to get
12:36along congratulations on your baby where you at with janet do you remember her coming up he wants
12:44to have sex all the time i also hate my body right now she shuts down every advance at one
12:49point you
12:49stop trying kind of thing
12:54you make me feel the eye eye eye eye the baby losing all my mind mind money
13:02i'm sure my boobies are good
13:08hey honey what are you doing i was just unpacking a little bit i miss you
13:14miss you too oh five days in calvo together and you're not tired of me yet
13:19no i probably could have done at least like three more days no i am definitely getting my sparkle back
13:27i met brandon in kentucky i was probably like 22 at the most and we instantly clicked and eventually
13:34it turned into like a romantic thing but the timing just wasn't right and it had been like 13 years
13:40since we've seen each other i'm like burning up so sunburn burnt to a crisp burnt to a crisp yeah
13:46me
13:47and brandon are so great together he tells me how beautiful i am every day he lives in california
13:53about three hours away we're like actually best friends and he just makes me feel really good
13:59nothing just hanging out the house crazy's asleep it's funny because the first time he came to visit
14:05i was like you can sleep in my guest room like i didn't know the spark was gonna be the
14:09same
14:10he slept in my guest room but i slept in there with him
14:14when are you gonna be back i guess thursday okay thursday i just want everybody to meet you i feel
14:20like
14:20i don't have a problem get along with everybody you know well you won't of course not you're a nice
14:25guy i guess you can't
14:52i don't know what you have to oh my god what's going on
14:59why are you so sweaty what's going on let me look at you you look super lean you look svelte
15:08you gotta you gotta reciprocate the compliment i'm sorry you look so good too thank you thank
15:12you you look great too but i want to level up a little more you know sometimes when you're depressed
15:16you put on weight after the bar closed i think i put on a happy 15 pounds i also feel
15:20like you
15:21especially after a bar you needed a break just like it like wore you down i was floundering man
15:27oh man my life kind of fell apart at the seams so after 12 years together and five years of
15:38marriage
15:39i went to tom last winter and asked him for a divorce divorced just hemorrhaging money she laid
15:47it all out and it made perfect sense i can't probably give you the specifics because i was
15:53so upset i wasn't really listening but also i don't want to ask her again because one of the reasons
15:57she
15:58broke up with me because i'm not a good listener i lost all my harmony and my zest i lost
16:02my shorts yeah
16:03but i think it's back i feel like a brand new me i don't know exactly how to articulate it
16:09but i
16:09just feel like i got my sparkle can i steal britney's line i feel like i got my sparkle back
16:14i'm happy it
16:15happened on some level i know that's up because i lost a lot of money but it just made me
16:19a better
16:19person it gave me grits it gave me like hood spa i've known tom since the day i moved to
16:25la he is one
16:26of the kindest gentlest most fun people that i've ever met you got stuck in like a really bad situation
16:34yeah now you're to the point where you're ready to like thrive instead of just like survive that's
16:39exactly it oh my god that's so good hey cheers by the way oh sorry i didn't mean to take
16:44it before
16:44you cheers okay well i saw that britney was in combo brandon was there too and she looks so happy
16:50listen i'm glad she's happy but i don't know i just worry because it's like
16:54she's so vulnerable right now she's looking for validation he said i love you so fast it's like
17:00it's moving far too fast but if you don't put in the work on yourself to then see these red
17:06flags
17:07you are going to fall for them again i think she can seriously consider doing a little master dating
17:13master dating is essentially just taking yourself out for a night in the town showing yourself a little
17:20love you have to just build yourself up in the field of britney's dreams if she builds it he will
17:29come and then she will come i'm like scared she's going far too fast yeah i'm already going in
17:37cautiously and i want her to be just as cautious and i feel like she might not be yeah but
17:43you and benji
17:44are strong the love is strong we're still figuring out his visa which is such a nightmare he's canadian
17:49yeah yeah we've set up our relationship where we have an open relationship oh this is interesting
17:55that's the thing is like sex and love are different we far too often fake it like oh sex is
17:59all about
17:59making a baby yeah then why is your prostate in your butthole okay jesus knew what he was doing when
18:06he put
18:06that up there coming up i left in tears if i can make things better i will you could have
18:13said christen
18:14this isn't the time or place not at my house
18:28hello hi i'm gonna do the blt
18:34oh with the crazy hair girl okay all right let's see where kristen is at oh sorry
18:47you lost it
18:50there you go
18:55hey girl hey hey hello come on over got stroller parking and everything
19:03i'm like here let me drag you out of the house while you need a bottle and a nap we're
19:08three blocks
19:08from home and we may as well be in a foreign country because that's how stressful this is don't
19:12you have like fun mimosa type thing with like okay we got like a very bellini i'll do that i
19:18mean the
19:18first time i left the house after giving birth i went to a grocery store and people weren't nice
19:24to me anymore because i wasn't pregnant
19:31like no one held the door open for me no one was like oh my god your belly's so cute
19:34they just walked right by me like i was just some piece of and it was awful she's so tired
19:41okay girlfriend
19:42you just hang out for a minute where'd you end up with breastfeeding and all that i just had like
19:47thank you i just had like nothing left i was barely giving her a bottle a day yeah like even
19:52even trying to pump twice a day yeah it just sucked i'm fine being at home and wearing like sweats
19:57in
19:58a bra but then when i have to leave the house i'm like have you guys gotten a date night
20:01uh-uh you're almost three months in you need a date night
20:09pull the trigger let your animal out don't you want to feel the rush
20:13rush i want to show you what i'm talking about get a little taste used to always play the same
20:18baby aren't you sick of feeling these baby let me let me come in what's up man how are you
20:25doing
20:25good how are you good tired yeah it's not kaya's fault last night though really i went out ah yeah
20:34wasn't thrilled about me going out last night but really it's all right i've been pushing her to go out
20:39so i can then go out more right how's lacy doing she's good yeah she was up the last two
20:45weekends and
20:46her daughter and isabel the two of them are like little sisters and they're starting to fight like
20:50little sisters the girlfriend from orange county can now be named her name is lacy she's incredibly
20:57intelligent incredibly passionate we spend a lot of time together our kids are really close and it's
21:04it's been incredible so things are great with lacy how are things between michelle and lacy
21:12michelle has said over and over again that she like doesn't want any communication
21:16but last summer i asked michelle to reach out to lacy before the yamashiro party just call and like
21:25you know put your cards on the table and just move forward so that we can all move on and
21:31michelle
21:31wanted no part of it she was this close to coming if michelle had called she'd be here right now
21:36it
21:36is not my responsibility to call your girlfriend well it would have helped me but you guys don't give
21:42a what we need to sort of start to create this like modern family situation lacy reached out to
21:49michelle when we first started dating she wanted to know if michelle had any boundaries and michelle didn't
21:55take it the right way i i don't i don't know where that's going to go to be honest with
22:00you
22:00michelle has made no effort and she wants nothing to do with this woman that spends half the week
22:07with her daughter and it just doesn't make any logical sense to me whatsoever how's everything
22:13going with the baby she's great first six weeks were really tough honestly yeah it's been kind of a
22:19tougher adjustment i mean the downtime will make you crazy man kristen wants me around for support and
22:26doesn't like when i leave the house you you got some baby blues thought of it like that i don't
22:33know i gotta dive into my feelings a little more huh therapy session i mean dr jesse i remember when
22:39i
22:39was a new dad it is a huge shift it's it's like uh hey you want to meet up for
22:43a drink i called six
22:45nannies they're not available it's difficult mentally in that first year it's definitely it's a change i mean i
22:52had isabella when i was 40 so at 33 i was still out and about around town so i can't
23:00imagine the
23:01transition at that age to this new world of responsibility lay it on me i've been there
23:08our relationship is completely lacking uh intimacy and that's just to be expected right to some degree i
23:15guess it should be something that we should be able to talk about we haven't really
23:20like how is luke dealing with what you're experiencing he gets it as well as he can't get
23:26it yeah you know yeah but he's like yeah we're still in a relationship yeah can we try to have
23:31sex
23:32can we do this like you're cleared for that i also hate my body right now she shuts down every
23:38advance
23:39at what point do you stop trying i know in my experience that i would have rather have had hard
23:43conversations because frustration turns to resentment very quickly he wants to have sex
23:49all the time and he's like well i love your body i'm like i like that your boobs are bigger
23:53and i like
23:53that you have a butt and i'm like that's really nice thanks but i know yeah exactly we've always
23:59had a really healthy sex life and it was just pretty regular but sex made a baby and now sex
24:04doesn't
24:05exist i just need time like i'm attached to her she's attached to me i think my natural defense
24:12mechanism to frustrations or whatever is just like basically kind of turning off emotions basically
24:17we're going to sweep everything under the rug until it's hardened into cement and we've got a permanent
24:21issue that we can't get rid of coming up is your boyfriend officially
24:41can i tell you something gross always when i was pregnant i got a skin tag on my gooch you
24:47know
24:47like the area in between your do you know what a gooch is no the area between your vagina and
24:51your
24:51butthole and i have a skin tag down there and i want it removed so bad but still there it's
24:57still there
24:57oh i have the best guy ever it has to be a dermatologist i want to be like all right
25:01where's the skin tag we're moving and i'm like hold on uh i gotta take all my clothes off and
25:05bend
25:06over and spread it though beforehand oh my god you must
25:12hi this is dangerous how close you are to these margaritas hello señoritas how are you tonight
25:18all of you are over 21 yes yes very hello okay skinny margarita let the danger begin
25:28your hair is oh my god i haven't seen how tan you are and how black i know this is
25:35your house
25:36morning present i was like this is our bottle service but you don't look at everything thank you
25:41i know i come over and she's like let me make you margarita oh my gosh hi i miss you
25:45how was your
25:46trip i know that's a big deal to go to cabo with him i know we just spent five days
25:51in cabo together
25:52and didn't drive each other crazy like is your boyfriend officially
26:03no he's not i won't say yes yet he asked yeah already yeah brandon is like very emotionally stable
26:13and i'm like that's normal you have no idea how sexy that is yeah brandon has a bde
26:25yeah he gives big dick energy because he's got a big one
26:31it's personality and it's real i'm so excited yeah i really like him he's a great person but
26:40what if i got like bored because things were so like good and so nice and i'm used to chaos
26:46and trauma
26:47can i help you find a therapist yeah i just got in therapy and it's so freeing to talk to
26:53somebody
26:54you know it's like an expert on life yeah i'm trying to be happy this year hey so what are
27:00you
27:01what's going on with you guys i feel like i've been talking about myself for hours michelle how are you
27:05feeling are you okay i've never had somebody break up with me dumb ass how's isabella doing with
27:11everything when erin and i broke up she cried oh man she's like why did you guys have to break
27:17up
27:18and i felt really guilty well you should not feel guilty you did everything like by the book like
27:23you should i'm proud of you i've tried but it was kind of confusing because it was like out of
27:29nowhere
27:29and like he wants a fitness girl i'm like oh my god oh my god i walk every day i
27:37hike i go to the gym he's
27:38like walking and hiking is not working out it's called cardio but going to the gym four days a week
27:47isn't enough she's not motivating i'm over here dipping my my feet and cheese she doesn't work out
27:55enough by the way the moment we broke up all he started doing is following instagram models so can i
28:03unfollow him now please i did but you know if you did your charity now you're done all right bye
28:10bitch that was easy by the way tomorrow the sip and see is at like 11 a.m what time
28:18should i show up
28:19i dare you i would never this is a baby event just beautiful perfect baby yeah but the thing is
28:27i also
28:27don't care that much to do that i don't care to fight with kristen i wish her well but i
28:33can only
28:33control my behavior and how kristen behaved at your house was gross that sucked that was odd she was
28:42like carrying her baby and yelling at the same time and then like two seconds later you were gone i
28:47was
28:47like what just happened what made you not say something because i was shook obviously i did not
28:54expect that it was gonna happen that day but i thought everyone was gonna be fine and she that up
29:00me and janet are so close she's been a great friend to me especially over everything i went
29:04through with jacks last year i feel like that's definitely something that has made me feel bad
29:10because i want to stick up for my friends but it's hard for me as the people pleaser i am
29:15and how much
29:16i hate conflict to get into the middle of everything cameron was bawling his eyes out and i had to
29:22strap him into his car seat after driving over saying we're gonna swim with cruz putting his chest
29:28out screaming and crying into the car i left in tears i cried all night too if i can make
29:36things
29:36better i will you could have said kristen this isn't the time or place not at my house
29:41like to walk into a party and have somebody be like why is she here she doesn't deserve to be
29:45here
29:46i haven't felt like that since seventh grade like since last time i felt like bullied
29:53and i'm not going to continue just showing up places where i'm getting yelled at
30:06coming up you're gorgeous thank you i still believe in love i believe in love too you too
30:12that's sweet as hell i don't know i just feel like it could work maybe
30:28i'm so gorgeous oh my goodness wow welcome hi and adelaide great last sympathy so beautiful
30:40this is so cute this is awesome and then we've got packed off appetizers i'll take a mocktail you
30:46might need a shot after everybody arrives exactly i'm excited for everybody to meet adelaide but i'm
30:51also excited to be in my old hood back to civilization oh the valley it feels good to be home
30:59thank you guys you're so gorgeous
31:03hey girl how are you you look beautiful
31:08adelaide so beautiful it's brighter in the valley and it's hotter geez maybe i'll do a rose
31:15with the cotton candy i feel like marilyn moreau in this dress
31:22what the heck you look like an angel i know we need we need a little
31:26marilyn oh cute where's kristen yeah where's she at you want a cocktail yes
31:37are you pooping again i have to brush my teeth oh my god oh my god we're like really late
31:47oh my goodness oh she's a beauty queen she's a sweet girl whenever she's ready you know i will hold
31:56her i know i want a baby okay well you need to get it together stop going to vegas doing
32:00these little
32:01vegas parties hi girl you look beautiful you're too so gorgeous let me see please tell me you're done
32:09are you done i'm done girl i say four and four how about one more you guys are more insane
32:16than i am
32:16no i wake up every day it's a nia with a scissors she's like it i'm like now i'm ready
32:25her feet are getting a little sun and her feet feet tan
32:30yeah we're so late all right we made it hi guys hey we're here breathe mama breathe
32:39congrats good how are you how was it today getting here it was a lot
32:47cheers to you daddy cheers cheers daddy luke i hate that word daddy luke daddy's got a hot dog
32:55he's so beautiful look at your dress it's so pretty oh don't you cry on me where's your pacifier
33:05don't cry okay i'll walk you around there's mommy don't please don't cry on me hi sis
33:13she's been just fine that was her first little whale she literally was fine until just the second
33:19michelle do you want to drink sure i'll do the baby shot okay okay can i do a skinny mark
33:25skinny mark with a full tahini please so wait michelle you ever seen house fella got her groove
33:31back no i have not that your groove isn't back but you're gorgeous thank you i'll take the compliments
33:38yeah okay yeah yeah keep them coming keep them coming look tom and michelle i'm and michelle
33:43wallace yeah i think we're on similar journeys i'm trying to live trying to laugh thank you what
33:50is the movie eat love pray yes that's what i'm trying to do yes we are julia roberts right now
33:55cheers
33:56i thought it would be cute make it at least hang out damn mine tom's very quirky and weird but
34:03you
34:04know maybe that's what people need opposites attract yeah michelle is a fine french wine tom's a
34:11yeager bomb in a sports book i still believe in love i believe in love too you do that's sweet
34:17as hell
34:17even though i went through the nastiest divorce and uh somebody who broke up with me i truly believe in
34:23that you're not jaded i don't know what your type is i don't know if i have a type okay
34:27it's usually
34:27a chemistry thing good no i just said if they went and had food that would be great i saw
34:33that you
34:34went to a photo spot that's my spot i love it there too it's the best do you want to
34:38go to a spot i'll
34:39go to a photo spot with you i want to have a night out of the town we'll do something
34:43anything
34:44spiritual something i need a spiritual awakening cheers to the beautiful babies cheers she's a really
34:52good baby oh look at the baby there we go when i was shaving my face i nicked my lip
35:02oh i didn't
35:03notice but now i do you're good great hi boo hi you're finally out and about thanks for coming oh
35:11great
35:13is that her yep uh what the is she doing here nobody told me she was coming because she was
35:20like i would never in my life no how you doing man good oh my goodness oh my goodness i
35:26love babies
35:27this is just not it's not a common name and she's not a common person either oh are we allowed
35:33to say
35:33her name this year i love you i love you lacy her and i've had a very difficult uh relationship
35:45i'm dealing with a person who thinks she knows everything and she wants everybody love her i can
35:51tell just a reminder this is the same woman who had her lawyer send me a cease and desist
35:57she's constantly threatening to sue me she was like i'm gonna send all of you guys cease and
36:02desist so you don't talk about me i met lacy's ex-boyfriend i was like oh my god she sent
36:07me a
36:08cease and desist he's like oh i got one too like she throws them out to everyone like she's a
36:12little
36:12insane not a banging body i mean so do you she's just not my cup of tea
36:24hi boys i didn't say hi to you how are you and how are you good good to see you
36:28good to see you
36:29hi that looks very good right now i can't believe you have a baby yeah i have to tell you
36:35something
36:36that you may not think is funny but i kind of thought it was funny we were talking me and
36:40my mom
36:40and my mom goes your baby kind of looks like blue my baby sosa so it's the blue eyes and
36:47i was like
36:47oh no he needed some extra money when he moved to la no when you were reading the profiles or
36:53whatever
36:53i'm like that could be me oh could you imagine wait did you donate sperm yeah
37:02my senior year of college i donated sperm to the same sperm bank that lala used to conceive sosa
37:07donor number one you guys he really has it all he is tall at six two with lean athletic build
37:13i'm
37:13six two and lean athletic build donor number three y'all his major was in accounting and finance okay
37:18so i have a degree in accounting and finance one of his biggest passions in life is cooking uh at
37:23the
37:24time i might have been really into cooking i don't know my hobbies jump around i don't know i could
37:28be
37:28one or three it could be all of them who knows hold on are you with me i know i
37:32was like wait a second
37:33he like gave a deposit oh my god i filled out everything i am shocked i did not have on
37:43my bingo
37:43card that he would say he's been a sperm donor at the same cryo bank i got sosa from oh
37:50my god it
37:50does look like look like now kristen is sosa's stepmom oh no luckily you stuck around i know you're really
37:59stuck oh yeah not going anywhere
38:10hi baby girl
38:13kristen can i grab your baby yeah she's oh i see her right here going to sun go the baby
38:24i'm gonna say hi to michelle okay
38:31hi hi
38:37i didn't even know you were coming
38:40oh nobody told me oh at least it's like a nice ambiance with babies
38:46yeah well less can go wrong i know it's a perfect little cute event well i'm happy to see you
38:53you do seem happy and like healthy and in a good place so
38:58i am we're as you know in a much better place than we were last summer i empathize with that
39:05are you
39:05divorced yeah i didn't know if you're officially divorced or i don't know anything about you
39:13oh i'm divorced listen i don't want to fight with any woman going through a divorce we had um
39:20a rough start but i know i'm sorry michelle and lacy speaking is the best case scenario for all of
39:28us you
39:29know hopefully it's just the beginning of what could grow into uh thanksgiving together all i need
39:36is a divorce and i'm done so ask him i'm team divorce i made it very easy for him i
39:42walk away
39:42with nothing so yeah i don't know the financials but i'm just hoping you guys have good healthy
39:55resolution lacy is now always with my friends and she's going to be at the parties i go to
40:01honestly it sucks and i hate it everybody likes her now all right
40:15i just had a long conversation i saw you over there i got to nervous i don't trust her
40:21i've seen her be super nice and i've also seen her be super rude to me
40:25let me get a cocktail finally yeah for sure last summer leading up to my zen party at yamashiro
40:33jesse kept begging me to call lacy and have conversations with her and i just said it's not
40:38the time and i don't want to have a conversation with this girl she seems completely unstable but
40:44she wants to portray that she's this like yeah sophisticated girl so this girl who says she would
40:51never film shows up to my zen party when there's cameras everywhere oh lacy's here hi hi no lace come
41:01here you guys are almost done i'll wait like five minutes i thought you were done we're finished at
41:0530. so i know things i just can't touch her when someone's like very unpredictable and chaotic it
41:15makes me super nervous exactly don't fall for lacy's in front of your face she'll be super nice and sweet
41:21but behind closed doors she's a bitch she can't be part of the party she has an nda she can't
41:27film
41:28why did she come here yeah because we wrapped at 10 we're not wrapped we're still filming not cool
41:34jeremiah not cool jesse's chaotic lacy's chaotic the two of them together are just insanity she was just
41:43being bossy and telling me what to do and like how our friendship's gonna be it doesn't really work
41:47that way and by the end of the conversation she was screaming at me she's like i have all the
41:51money
41:51in the world and i don't care i will sue you and i will win jesse jesse jesse no no
41:56i'm gonna go
42:06this fall is gonna be hard enough having to deal with jesse dragging his feet with the divorce
42:11now i have this crazy girlfriend there's only so much i can take before i snap how did that go
42:16it's fine baby you're the problem
42:22next time on the valley it's my daughter's first birthday party it looks amazing delicious mocktails
42:29for us let's get a little drunky and maybe have a little bumpy an apology would be nice for like
42:35all the you called me this friendship is dead it's done like you're crazy oh it just makes me want
42:41to
42:41cry thinking about it it took me over two hours to get home she's crying i'm crying we're both crying
42:45i'm sorry i'm sorry i think i'm just like on the verge of burnout
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