00:00by you slash scared weakness 62 50. This all happened today. My folks decided to host a
00:05barbecue because, I guess, that's what older people do. I declined because I really don't
00:09like my two sisters, their husbands, or their kids, my wife and I are childfree. Mom then
00:14pressured my wife. Long story short, we went. By the time we arrived, there were about 20 people
00:20there. My sisters and their husbands were already solidly buzzed, drunk, really. My mom was spending
00:25100% of her time trying to keep the nieces and nephews, ages 7 to 11, more or less under
00:30control. My dad had strategically retreated to the whirlpool section of the pool with a small
00:35cooler full of beers. My wife and I made small talk with miscellaneous people, ate food, and had a
00:40frozen margarita. My sisters and brothers-in-law took turns criticizing us for being late, not being
00:45in our swimsuits, and screwing up the vibe. Whatever. Typical suburban summer get-together.
00:50About 45 minutes in, two of the kids ran at one of the neighbor guests, who was standing next to
00:54the
00:54pool, and pushed her in. She was at the pool steps, stumbled in but didn't fall, so only got
00:59half wet. She was clearly very unhappy about it, but she didn't make a scene, she just went over to
01:04where the parents were, grabbed their towels, dried herself off, and left. My sisters and their
01:09brothers-in-law thought it was all great fun. A bit later, I was standing a few feet away from
01:13the
01:13pool, chatting with someone. I saw three of the kids running full tilt at me from the corner of my
01:18eye. Obviously, I was next. Not that it's terribly difficult to outwit young kids, but I just jumped out of
01:24their way at the last second. All three of them ran straight into the pool at full speed. Most of
01:28the
01:29other guests, including my wife and me, started laughing, but their moms, who, as I mentioned,
01:34were pretty wasted, absolutely freaked out. Apparently, two of the kids couldn't swim even
01:38though they were in swimsuits. Since I wasn't in swim gear, I stepped back from the pool and let
01:43other people fish the kids out. The kids were bawling their heads off like they'd lost a limb. At that
01:48point, all hell broke loose. The four drunk parents were yelling at everyone in general and me in
01:52particular for nearly letting their kids drown, and also because two of the kids had been videoing
01:56the trick using their parents' iPhones, which were now at the bottom of the pool. One of my
02:00brothers-in-law got into the pool to try to retrieve the phones, but his BMI and BAC made that
02:04impossible.
02:05No one else volunteered to help, unsurprisingly, given that my sisters were still complaining at
02:10everyone. I told my sisters it was their job to watch their kids and that if anything had happened
02:14to them, it would have been their responsibility, not mine. There were some pretty strong words on both
02:18sides. My wife and I left after the other brother-in-law fell over and face-planted while
02:22yelling at us. Now they're saying I should have let the little craps knock me into the pool and have
02:26their fun, and ruin my phone. So, was I wrong here? Side note, Dad, of course, never got out of
02:33the
02:33whirlpool.
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