- 8 hours ago
Age of Attraction Season 1 Episode 7
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00:08¡Gracias!
00:30Okay, do you remember why you like me?
00:32Here we go. I see somebody's excuse us
00:54Here's the Haley Cheers, so Haley
00:59She's a Leo. He's a Leo. Oh my gosh
01:01What's your birthday? Here we go again with the star talk
01:03No, I don't believe in that. Remember, we don't believe in that
01:05Okay, so anyways, we became best friends and she did not know how old I was
01:11How old did you think I was when we were hanging out?
01:13Maybe five years older than me
01:15And I told her and she laid in fetal position
01:18Because I was shocked
01:19Yeah, she looks good
01:20So Logan did not know my age
01:22So how old are you looking?
01:24Wait, let's tell her our story first
01:25Okay
01:25Let's tell her our story first
01:27Yeah, I mean, so
01:28Tell her how we met
01:30You want to go?
01:31No, no, I'm an interrupter
01:32Yeah, she interrupts me a lot
01:34Okay, go ahead
01:34Um, so
01:36Yeah, we met at this retreat
01:37And the whole point of the retreat was like, you know, go in, not thinking about age
01:42Not talking about age
01:42That's, that was like the goal
01:44And out of all the women there, I connected with Vanessa the most
01:48And I wanted to continue, you know, seeing it out
01:51Obviously, I just felt like we had a connection
01:53And then after that, we moved in together
01:56Yeah
01:56Okay
01:57And now we're here
01:58And how is that, how is that, um
02:00Yeah, the other one living with Vanessa
02:01It's been fun
02:03I mean, she's, she's, you can tell she's a strong independent woman
02:08Are you keeping up?
02:10You know, I try, um, but it looks like I think I'm doing a good job
02:14I don't know, I mean, we have our ups and downs, but it's good
02:17And I think
02:17Tell me, tell me about that
02:19I think
02:20What about the downs?
02:20You know, it's like, we, I mean, we're too fiery
02:22Like, we're, we have a very fiery personality
02:24Yeah, you're a leader
02:25Like, you know, we do fight, I'm not gonna lie
02:28I mean, we kind of tell each other how it is
02:30And, you know, how we feel
02:31Like, he kind of matches my energy and I match his energy
02:34Yeah
02:35Now we're just, you know
02:36Then we can get to the age
02:37We're not getting to the age yet
02:39You wanted to get to the age early on
02:41I'm saving a lot of what you said
02:42Well, you're sorry
02:43Chops goes in so many pieces
02:44I know, I'm sorry
02:45I'm sorry
02:46Say this, say this
02:47What do you want me to say?
02:48Okay, I'm sorry
02:48I'm just really excited
02:49Is this, like, that fighting that I'm seeing right now?
02:51The fieryness
02:52Yeah, just like, say this, say this
02:54Oh, don't talk about the age
02:56Oh, don't talk about the age
02:57All right, say what you want to say
02:58Guess how old you
02:58No, I'm just saying
02:59Okay, just guess how old you
03:00I want her to guess
03:0238
03:03Well, I'm old
03:04How old are you?
03:06I'm 29
03:07No, I'm not
03:09Are you screaming, crying through?
03:11Here's the thing, though
03:12Here's the thing
03:12You guys are best friends, though
03:16Vanessa's young
03:17No, and that's why we click so well
03:19Like, even, like, when we're in the apartment
03:21I don't feel the age difference
03:23You know, but then sometimes
03:24It's like, if you go out
03:26Or, like, this conversation
03:27You get reminded of it
03:28And it's like, that part's hard
03:29But it's like, everything else
03:31When I think of Vanessa
03:32I mean, I feel like we're the same thing
03:34Right, right, right, right
03:35Well, what I want to say
03:36Is, like, I think it's so cool
03:37My best friend is 32
03:39Yeah
03:39And my best guy is 29
03:41Like, and I'm 49
03:43Top of the roster
03:44He's the top of the roster
03:45He's my only one
03:46Stop
03:48You're the only one
03:49Oh, my gosh
03:51I just, it's crazy
03:52You know, I wasn't happy to see
03:56Hayley's reaction to, like, how old I actually am
03:58I'm constantly reminded of the age gap
04:02With my parents
04:03With the outside world
04:05Now with Hayley
04:06And, you know, it's tough
04:07It's the reality of, you know
04:09Our life together so far
04:11So, um, hopefully Vanessa's saying good things
04:14Uh, but, you know, you never know
04:16Obviously, you know my dating history
04:18Yes
04:19I want to hear, like, what your impression of him was
04:21I, I don't know, like
04:23I thought it was kind of weird
04:25The way
04:27You guys, like, literally got, like
04:29These, like, little mini fights
04:30Yeah
04:30Like, what's going on there?
04:31Is it, like, in a fun way?
04:34Or is this in, like, a bad way?
04:35I know, okay
04:36Does this remind you of any relationships of mine?
04:39All of them
04:39Yes, I know, seriously
04:42So, at some point, I'm like
04:43Like, is this me?
04:44Or is this him?
04:45Or do I just pick really strong personality?
04:48I don't know
04:49I don't like that
04:49And
04:50Yeah
04:50I think that the meeting
04:52Obviously, this is a strange situation
04:54But that was
04:56Bad, bad
04:57It's just a bad interaction
04:58Okay
04:59He literally had a mini fight with you
05:01Like, twice while we were sitting there
05:02Yes
05:02Like, that's weird
05:03Yeah
05:04Do you think that's weird?
05:05Yes
05:05So, that's what I want to talk about
05:06So, we move in together
05:08I thought we were friends
05:09And, like, then finally, like
05:11It got to be more than friends
05:12But, like
05:13Wait, you move in together
05:14And you feel like you guys are just friends?
05:16In the beginning
05:16For, like, the first couple of days
05:17He was, like, sleeping with a pillow in between us
05:20And saying his prayers at night
05:21I mean, that seems, like, significant
05:22It's just, like, these dumb little things
05:24That make me think he's still a little childish
05:27You know?
05:27I mean, 29
05:28But I think, like, I look at you and you're 32
05:30And I don't feel, like, an age difference
05:32Between you and I at all
05:34Like, you're that person
05:35Like, you need to fight
05:36But that's all I'm hearing is, like, unflashed
05:38I know, me too
05:39And at first I was, like
05:41Me too
05:41I was excusing them as, like, yellow fives
05:43Are you, like, ready to take this home
05:46Like, to the next level?
05:47Yeah
05:47Like, you want to continue this relationship
05:49Yeah
05:49So
05:50I mean, obviously, things would be different
05:53Yeah, sure
05:54So for me, I feel like
05:58Honestly
06:00This thing that we've been through
06:02Has bonded us together
06:03Yeah
06:03Like, in a way that, like, I've never been with anyone else
06:07You know?
06:07In the beginning, it was great
06:08And then it got a little lukewarm
06:10And then it was bad
06:12And then it was good
06:13And now I'm just, like, where am I?
06:15Like, it's been, like
06:15I've been running in circles with it
06:19Do you think it's his age?
06:20Or do you think it's his personality type?
06:22It's sounding to me
06:24That it could be just a little bit of both
06:26Yeah
06:28Maybe he's, like, having an issue with the age
06:31And that's why he's so hot and cold
06:33Yeah
06:33And, like, causing these problems
06:36I know
06:37Yeah
06:37So, like
06:39So, like, what is
06:39So, should he, like, take that ring off your ring?
06:42Yeah
06:44In relationships, Vanessa normally
06:46Wants somebody super outgoing
06:49The life of the party
06:50I think she needs somebody a little bit younger
06:53Somebody who's still outgoing, fun
06:55Not a lot of baggage
06:57But at the same time
06:59That's kind of, like, where things might come into a problem
07:01Because he is those things
07:03So, you know, do I think this is the best thing for her?
07:07I'm not sure
07:08No, we can't take this for granted anymore
07:14I gave everything up for all week
07:19This is the last day in your life
07:21Oh, parachute pants
07:24Not really
07:25I like these
07:26They are not parachute pants
07:27They're just
07:29That was the year I was born
07:30Oh, my God
07:31Awesome
07:32Good to know
07:34Um
07:35I went to breakfast with my sister
07:38She kept asking me about age and stuff
07:41And I told her
07:45Okay
07:46It's important for them to know
07:48Yeah, but, like, they don't know me
07:50But I know you
07:51So they need to know about who you are
07:54I just
07:54It's hard for me to sort of, like, understand
07:58How they could, like, accept me
08:00Given all of those, like, very different circumstances
08:05I would think that they would be like
08:07How can you know that you feel the way you do?
08:12I think my people are going to be a little bit more cautious
08:17I know my kids
08:18I know that they want me to be happy
08:21They want me to find someone
08:25You know, they love me
08:29So they
08:33I, you know, I can't imagine that they'd be, like
08:38Against what I want
08:40But
08:41I don't know
08:44I mean, it's
08:46Scary
08:47Yeah
08:47I think the more we talk about it
08:49The more scared I get
08:50Because I'm worried that
08:51That something I can't control
08:54Is going to fuck this up
08:55I get it
08:57I don't want to get blindsided
08:59I just need to know from you
09:00Is it worth it for me
09:02To continue to invest in this?
09:07Do you think we can navigate that backlash together?
09:11I mean, this is just really hard
09:14But it's just, like, I wish we didn't have this stupid complication
09:20What complication?
09:21Like, just the worry about people's perceptions and judgments and age stuff
09:26But it's a complication on your side
09:28I'm only stressed about it because you're stressed about it
09:31And you're so stressed about it
09:35Emotions are running high
09:37I know I'm gonna hate this
09:47You said it's hard
09:48Mm-mm
09:49We're meeting somebody
09:50I'm like a viper
09:51Nervous as shit
09:53Hey
09:53Don't call me out like that
09:55You're nervous too
09:57I am
09:57Very
10:04I'm happy to see you, actually
10:06I'm so happy
10:06You didn't expect to see me
10:08No
10:09So happy
10:10Oh my god
10:10Well, I gotta give him my hand
10:11I'm super excited to see my best friend and my cousin
10:15Good to see you
10:16Hi, nice to meet you
10:18Nice to meet you
10:18I'm good, I'm good
10:20What is your name?
10:21Pfeiffer
10:21Pfeiffer, Ray-Therese
10:23Nice to meet you
10:24She's seen me at low points
10:27So she's protective of me and, you know, my feelings and my heart
10:31So I definitely know she's going to have some tough questions
10:35Derek is definitely a pivotal point of my life
10:38So I'm just wanting to see how you guys connect
10:42Have you guys talked about any future plans?
10:45Or have you thought about any future plans?
10:47Yeah
10:47Yeah, we have
10:48So she's currently in Seattle
10:51Oh, Seattle, nice
10:52Okay
10:52And, like, her contract where she's working is up in three months
10:56Wow
10:57Wow
10:57Wow
10:58All right, timing
10:59Okay
10:59Yeah
10:59All of that's lined up
11:00So we talked about, obviously, me having the boys, right?
11:04So she's open to moving because, obviously, I'm stationary, I can't
11:07Correct
11:08And you are living in Seattle currently
11:10Yes
11:11Yes
11:11So that would be a big move for you
11:13Yes
11:13If you were to move to Texas
11:14It would be
11:15I'm originally from Pittsburgh
11:17Okay
11:18So I moved from Pittsburgh to Seattle by myself
11:21Nice
11:36It was a big, a big, I mean, cross-country change
11:52To be your only relationship in your life
11:55Because that's a lot of pressure for one person to be everything
11:57And that's kind of what I was gearing towards, too
12:00Yes
12:00Considering the kiddos
12:01Yes
12:02Okay, how do you feel about
12:03Yeah
12:04I mean, I knew right when I started talking to Derek that he had children
12:08And that's, like, very important to me
12:10Correct
12:10Um, and I knew that he wouldn't be able to move
12:13But I am in the position where I can
12:15Okay
12:15Um, and I take, I mean, I take family seriously
12:18I really want a big family with lots of kids
12:20I'm assuming you don't have kids
12:22No
12:22Okay
12:23And so you want a big family
12:24Yes
12:25You would be okay with kind of incorporating yourself into a family
12:28Absolutely, yeah
12:29Awesome
12:30I mean, just more, more people to love
12:32Exactly
12:32Um, yeah
12:34And remind me, I don't know, how old are you?
12:37I'm 23
12:40Okay
12:42I did not know that
12:43Yeah
12:44We did it a little bit different
12:46A little far apart
12:47Yeah, we didn't, we didn't know
12:48We had no concept of each other's age
12:50Um, but it, yeah, I really have no
12:52I have no person, like, I have no issue with age gaps
12:55Um, I'm, I'm really, I am about, like, who is the person
12:59Who, correct
13:00Because it doesn't matter
13:01I've been in alignment with her life
13:02But have you dated someone with kids?
13:05I, no
13:06I have never dated anybody with children
13:08Okay
13:09Um, I guess my biggest point of reference was
13:12Well, my parents were split up when I was really young
13:15Um, and my dad was, like, basically a single dad
13:17Um, so I had a lot of personal experience
13:20With, like, the step-parent figure
13:23Okay
13:24Um, I think there's definitely a way to go about, um, being, like, we've talked about being introduced
13:30To, to his, to his children
13:32Um, and I think it's really important to take the time before doing that
13:36Um, because I know how it's impacted me meeting people quickly, um, like, the women that my dad was with,
13:43um, I would never want to put Derek's children in that situation
13:47And it seems like you're very understanding
13:49Right
13:49Which is, honestly, a very amazing characteristic, you know?
13:53But being, like, in the real world
13:56Totally
13:56Of things where it's like, hey, we only plan quality time
13:59Right
13:59Once a month
14:00Well, Dom is calling now
14:02Yeah
14:02And he's saying, hey, I miss you, Dad
14:04Right
14:05And Derek goes with his son
14:08How would that kind of look?
14:10Like, yeah, if I feel like time is not being made
14:13It, I would just bring it up
14:15And I would say, like, yeah, like, I'm feeling, like, can we get, like, one date in the books a
14:20month
14:20Like, I don't need, I don't need a ton
14:22You're not asking for every day
14:25Viper's 23
14:29I, that, that, that, that, that's, that's, that's a gap
14:34What does that really look like long term?
14:38Because 10 years from now, she could be a completely different person than she is today
14:42And maybe those things that Viper mentioned she was okay with
14:46Maybe she wouldn't be okay with five years from now
14:48Who knows?
14:49I think these are questions that are something to kind of think about
14:53Totally
14:54Absolutely, yeah
14:55We need to see when that storm hit
14:57Right, what it looks like
14:58What does it look like?
14:59Right, absolutely
14:59And it will, it'll hit
15:00Like, that's, that's just life in general
15:04Let me fade away to the night
15:12How are you feeling?
15:14Mm
15:16I'm okay
15:17It could be better
15:19Do you want to, do you want to talk a little bit?
15:21I mean, I don't, I don't know
15:23What do you want to talk?
15:26Yeah, actually, I'd like to tell you how I'm feeling a little bit
15:28Okay
15:28You want to sit down?
15:29Yeah, just give me a blankie
15:32I have never been broken down this much in a relationship
15:35And I've never felt so exhausted in moments in relationships
15:37But I care about Leah so much
15:39And I care about the connection that we've made
15:41I want to make this work and move forward
15:45I want to talk
15:46And all I really want to talk about was just to remind you that I see you
15:49And that I know that this is hard on you
15:52Just like this is hard on me, this whole process
15:55But I want to be honest about the fact that the overbearingness
16:02It's quite literally driving me nuts
16:04Maybe I just think of it a little differently
16:06I think I'm more of a, I'm trying to do like a we thing
16:09But then it's like I feel like you keep doing a me thing
16:12Which is cool
16:13Well, I think it goes back to the fact that you don't want to be left alone
16:18Which I understand
16:19I think what you realize is like I'm left alone a lot
16:23I'm a flight attendant
16:24We're alone all the time
16:26Like trust me
16:27When I'm alone, I'm alone
16:29And I have no problem with it
16:31But it's like I just don't understand
16:33I don't know what is healthy for you and healthy for me
16:37And then like find us our healthy place
16:39I'm struggling
16:41Like I'm really, really struggling
16:42I know, I see it
16:44And that's why I'm like I don't
16:45That's why for me it's like I don't know what to do for you
16:48And like I want you to be like your happy, healthy self
16:51I just, I don't know
16:52I just, I miss what it was like at the retreat
16:55I know
16:56And like I miss the way you looked at me
16:59I do
17:02I, I, it hurts me to hear that like
17:05You feel
17:06That I'm looking at you that way
17:08Because I really am trying
17:10My absolute heart is to make sure you feel loved
17:14Like I really am
17:15I'm just telling you that I won't leave this
17:18Without giving all of that I got
17:21That's
17:21I can say the same
17:22You know
17:23And I, and I believe that you won't either
17:25So I appreciate you hearing me
17:27No, thank you for having this conversation with me
17:30Yeah
17:31Let's just take it day by day
17:32We're good
17:34Thank you
17:39Thank you
17:42We'll figure this out
17:44I feel the love was
17:46I used to call my
17:50Mmm
17:52Delicious
17:53So good
17:54Having my friends meet Libby
17:57Really put things into perspective for me
17:59I mean integrating a 22 year old girl into my life is definitely concerning
18:06We live on different coasts, different time zones
18:09Kids, work, life
18:12And what happens when we're back to all of that
18:17So remember when we were like talking
18:19And you were telling me how you wish that you would have
18:23Taken more time between college and the real world
18:28And like traveled or moved abroad or something
18:32I don't know
18:33It's just been like on my mind
18:35Like I know we have the commitments that are coming up
18:41And I feel like the closer we get to that
18:44The more I've been in my head about like
18:48Is there a future with us?
18:50Are we aligned?
18:51Is our age going to be more of a factor?
18:55I just know like when I was 22
18:58I wasn't ready to be in a serious committed relationship
19:02And I knew that
19:03So it was just I don't know
19:06It's been something that's on my mind
19:07I'm like if there's more life that you feel like
19:09You need to go and live
19:11And like do it by yourself
19:13Like I would understand that
19:15To me I don't view it as that
19:17I'm not like oh this is somebody
19:19Who's going to take away from my life
19:20And they're going to expect me to
19:23Be a certain way or
19:25Not travel
19:26Not have fun
19:27Not see my friends
19:29Whatever
19:30I don't see it like that
19:31I feel like you add to my life
19:33I mean I've already had so much fun with you
19:35And like to me
19:36That's experiencing life
19:38I know I'm a lot of fun
19:39Like right now
19:41I am more boring at home
19:43Yeah
19:43I don't go out that much
19:46There's definitely
19:47My life is more
19:48Just like established and settled
19:51And I think that's always been an issue with me
19:53When I date like you
19:54You know younger
19:55It's like am I holding you back from
19:58You know
19:58I guess what
20:00I wanted in my 20s
20:01I don't know
20:02Like obviously I'm only 22
20:04But I don't think I'm as crazy as you might think
20:07The most important things to me in my life
20:09Have been stability
20:11And my friends
20:12And my family
20:13And you know
20:15Like my career
20:16And keeping myself on track
20:17And all that stuff
20:18Like that's what feels good in life to me
20:21Not being crazy
20:23Part of something I wanted to experience
20:25Was a stable relationship
20:27With a normal person
20:28An old guy
20:30Really old
20:31Really old guy
20:32Really old person
20:33I think it's just hard to hear
20:36A lot of hesitation from him
20:38And I guess
20:39It hits me differently now
20:41That I've like opened up to him fully
20:43There is a part of me that is nervous that
20:48If we get to the next step
20:50And we're outside of here
20:52These doubts and reservations will just continue
20:54And at that point we will be
20:56Fully in
20:57And that will only get harder
21:02Everything we're getting closer
21:05Fully in a way that's on fire
21:08Slipping out of the shadows
21:11Same with me?
21:12No, I'm good
21:13Yeah?
21:13Yeah, for now
21:15So you got to meet my friend
21:17Which I'm so happy
21:18Because how ironic
21:20Like my best friend and you
21:22Are like the same age
21:23It's pretty on brand
21:24I feel like
21:25Yeah, yeah
21:25I did not expect you
21:26I expected nothing less of your best friend
21:29I expected her to be young, vibrant
21:30Just like you
21:31Yeah
21:31It was cool to see you with your
21:33With your girl
21:33You know
21:34Like you were
21:35You were shining as always
21:36I'm still happy
21:37What do you think her honest opinion is of me and this?
21:41I think she was just worried about the fighting thing
21:43Like less saying the fighting
21:44It kind of alerted her
21:46Yeah
21:46To like
21:47What is this fighting?
21:48What is going on?
21:49Like
21:49Is this a big deal?
21:51Type of thing
21:51Does this like define us?
21:53Are we more than just having like little fights?
21:56You know
21:56I mean you tell me
21:58I mean I don't want it
21:59What do you think?
22:00No, I don't want it to define us
22:01I don't either
22:02I would like to just be able to like
22:05Elevate both of us
22:06To a place where like
22:08We don't have to have the fighting anymore
22:10You know what I mean?
22:11Right, right, right
22:11It's just like
22:12It's like a battle of egos
22:14You know
22:14Like it's just not healthy
22:16And it's not good
22:17And I don't want to do it
22:18So
22:19Yeah
22:19So I'm like
22:20From this point on
22:22I'm like
22:22I just want to pick the battles
22:23Like if it's not worth fighting
22:24Right, right, right
22:25And I feel like today was a good day
22:26Like you know
22:27We got annoyed with each other
22:28But we're like
22:28Whatever, blow it off
22:29You know
22:30Yeah
22:30So I mean
22:31Do you think like
22:32Eventually like
22:32Just our little quips
22:33Be like
22:34That's just Vanessa
22:35I would hope so
22:36I mean it was funny
22:38Because like at dinner
22:39Like he was like
22:39Is this a fight?
22:40You know
22:40Yeah
22:41No
22:41Like this is literally
22:43Me talking
22:44And then all of a sudden
22:45You going like
22:45No, talk about this
22:46Talk about this
22:47Talk about this
22:47And then going in circles
22:48I'm like
22:48Vanessa
22:48What do you want from me?
22:50I'm always ten steps ahead
22:51Yeah
22:51I know
22:51You are
22:52You're right
22:52But like you have to see that
22:53In yourself
22:53No, I know that
22:54You know what I mean?
22:55Because my mind is like
22:56Constantly going
22:57It is
22:57But it's like
22:57Look, if you want somebody
22:58To
22:58And their personality
22:59To be their personality
23:00You have to take a step back
23:02Yeah, it goes both ways
23:03I'm not saying it's just you
23:04Like there's me
23:05Like I'm like
23:07Push, push, push
23:07And you're like
23:10You're ten steps behind
23:11And I'm ten steps forward
23:11You know what I mean?
23:12Well I've just given you
23:13The steps
23:13Yeah, I know
23:14I know
23:15You know
23:15But I do feel like
23:16Like
23:16I want you to accept me
23:19For how I am
23:19And I want to accept you
23:20For how you are
23:21So it's like
23:23We just have to like
23:24Navigate through that
23:26Right
23:27So
23:28Hopefully we can figure this out
23:30Yeah
23:30So what's next?
23:32Yeah
23:32Yeah, what's next?
23:34I just asked you
23:35You can't ask me that question
23:36No, I mean
23:37It's like the question
23:38That's hanging in the air
23:39Like where do we go from here?
23:41You know?
23:42What's next?
23:42We enjoy the night
23:43Stop it
23:45And we have fun
23:46And we light some candles
23:48Okay
23:48I step out and take this ride
23:52I feel alive
23:54So I'm gonna stand by ground
23:57Got something to believe in
23:59Even if I fall back down
24:03Nothing's gonna stop me now
24:05Cause now I'm fireproof
24:10All right
24:11What's on the happy hour menu
24:13We expect
24:13Oh, wine flight
24:19Zero appetite
24:20Zero appetite
24:22No
24:26Here they are
24:29Yay
24:31Oh, my God
24:33Hey, Mom
24:36How are you?
24:37Good, how are you doing?
24:38Richard
24:38John
24:39John, nice to meet you
24:40Oh, my God
24:45I can't believe you guys are all here
24:47It is crazy
24:48Were you not expecting
24:49Like to come?
24:50How are you guys?
24:51Good
24:51How are you?
24:52Wow
24:52I can't believe you guys are all here
24:54Yeah
24:55Cheers
24:56Cheers
24:56Nice to meet you
24:57Thanks for coming
24:59Taking the flight
25:00Very, very happy to
25:01It's been fun
25:02Your mom talks about all you guys
25:05All the time
25:06Obsessively
25:07And I'll say that she's very proud of you guys
25:10Yeah
25:10I'm happy you guys are here
25:12Yeah
25:13And I think she is too
25:14No, I'm not happy
25:16Yeah
25:17Yeah
25:18Well, what made you want to take this journey?
25:23I guess getting out of Miami
25:25Miami's very superficial
25:26And not to talk down on it
25:29But it's hard to make like a genuine connection
25:32I came into this experience like super open-minded
25:35And ready for whatever came to me
25:39And connected fast
25:40Yeah
25:41For whatever reason
25:42Like we gravitated towards each other
25:45From the very beginning
25:45And it's just like our relationship has built more and more
25:49And it's, you know, been very genuine
25:52He's like a nice, safe dude
25:54And it's been really great to get to know him
25:58And are you guys living together right now?
26:02Yeah
26:02Oh, you are
26:03How's that?
26:04It's been good
26:05He's being a very good boy
26:08He's like picking up and like doing things
26:11But yeah, actually like probably the one thing that I would say
26:16That bothers me the most
26:18Is that like a couple times we've been at like a restaurant
26:20And you'll take like a paper napkin
26:22And you'll just be like
26:24Toot
26:24And I'm like
26:25That's not where that goes
26:27See, I'm learning something
26:28Small things
26:29Yeah
26:29Small things
26:30I feel like I do that
26:30I know
26:31I never would say anything like that
26:32Yeah, well
26:33What do you think about like having like
26:35Like her having like older kids too
26:37So
26:39We'll
26:40I don't know
26:41We've talked about that, but
26:42Yeah, like when we revealed
26:46Like our truths to each other
26:48Age
26:49And obviously you guys were a huge part of that
26:53He was like
26:54Whatever
26:56Not like a passive, right?
26:58Just like
26:59Yeah
26:59You know, you are who you are
27:00And she shouldn't be
27:02And she's not
27:03By any means
27:03But she shouldn't be ashamed of that
27:05And you don't want to have kids
27:06I'm assuming
27:08I don't want kids, no
27:10I've never
27:12Seen that in my future
27:14Yeah
27:15Yeah
27:15I felt comfortable giving her that answer
27:18And
27:18Yeah
27:18That's
27:19How I honestly feel
27:21So
27:21That's fair
27:22I mean, I will say the fact that we are all like
27:24Older though too
27:25It kind of
27:25You don't have to deal with the BS of like
27:27I don't know
27:28Like me going to college
27:30Or like paying
27:30I don't know
27:31Yeah, yeah, yeah
27:32Like the pressure of all that
27:34Yeah, yeah, yeah
27:34I mean, that's part of why
27:36I agreed to do this
27:37Was because I
27:38You know
27:39Now that we're all done, yeah
27:41Well, it's not
27:41Yeah, I mean
27:42It's not that you're done
27:43Like obviously
27:43I'm always going to be your mom's
27:45And be supportive and everything
27:47But
27:48It did come
27:49Sort of at a strange time
27:51That this opportunity was like
27:53Literally the day
27:55I left your graduation
27:56Right
27:57And I remember like
27:58Leaving you guys that day
28:00Yeah
28:00And crying
28:01And being like
28:02What am I doing?
28:03What am I doing?
28:04You know
28:04Like because I was like
28:05Having doubts about it
28:07And
28:08Leaving you guys
28:09Was so hard
28:11Yeah
28:12But
28:13You know
28:14But I mean
28:15You've always tried to protect us
28:16And think about us first
28:17But
28:18Maybe
28:19You've been neglecting yourself
28:20It's important to take care of yourself too
28:22And to do something that's for you
28:24And for your future
28:25Yeah
28:28Yeah
28:32Yeah
28:32I mean
28:33That's what I said
28:34You know
28:35In this whole thing
28:36Was like
28:36I
28:37More or less
28:38Like finished that chapter
28:40Making sure you guys
28:41Were like
28:42Sent off
28:43On like
28:43Your
28:43Like
28:44Best way possible
28:45And so now
28:46It was like
28:47A time for me
28:48To find
28:50You know
28:51Something
28:52That was good for me
28:54And
28:54Like
28:55Your own happiness
28:57Exactly
28:57Yeah
28:58Yeah
28:59How would you envision
29:01Your ideal future together
29:03Like
29:03Um
29:05Yeah
29:06I don't
29:06I mean
29:07We don't know
29:08Like
29:08I'm not going to predict anything
29:12I respected Lauren
29:13For
29:14Caring about her mom
29:16And asking those hard questions
29:18I think
29:18Probably all three of the kids
29:20Were
29:21Interested in those answers
29:22I know how important
29:24Like family time is
29:25So I'm going to head back
29:26To the apartment
29:27Thanks again for coming
29:28Hopefully we catch up soon
29:30Yes
29:30Good to meet you
29:33Yes
29:34Very nice to meet you
29:35Thanks again
29:36Yeah
29:36Do you have again
29:37Yeah
29:38Nice to meet you
29:40Of course
29:41Hopefully see you soon
29:43Yep
29:44I think today went great
29:45But
29:46I saw
29:47Teresa kind of beat around the bush
29:49I wish she was a little more confident
29:50And proud
29:52Yeah
29:53I think John and I are solid
29:55I kind of wish she would have
29:57Boasted about that a little more
29:59And I think the kids would have probably
30:01Fed off her energy
30:03Saying like
30:04Oh shit
30:04My mom's like
30:05She's really sold on this guy
30:06So
30:07I didn't love that
30:10Lack of enthusiasm
30:12Yeah
30:13What do you think?
30:15You look really happy
30:16And I'm so excited for you
30:19Do you see yourself like
30:22Getting married?
30:23I don't know
30:24Yeah
30:25Can't answer that question
30:26You know you guys have seen me like
30:29Hurt and
30:32Destroyed
30:32And
30:32Yeah
30:33You know
30:34And I don't want you guys to
30:36See that again
30:37So I'm being very careful
30:39And
30:41But I also want to take your
30:43Feelings and
30:45Consideration into
30:47My decision making
30:48You know
30:48I don't want anybody to be
30:50Uncomfortable with any
30:51Situation that I'm like
30:53In
30:54So
30:55You know
30:56I want you guys to
30:57At all times
30:58Feel like
30:59You can be
31:00I'm not just saying this
31:02Like you can
31:03Be up front with me
31:04Yeah
31:04And tell me
31:05Because
31:06You are
31:07Like the most important things
31:09To me in my
31:10Whole world
31:12So can you tell us
31:13About his age?
31:16No
31:17I mean I can
31:18But I don't want to
31:19Why?
31:21Because I
31:22Really feel strongly
31:23That I want you
31:24To get to know him
31:25Like I did
31:26Yeah
31:26You know
31:27We formed a connection
31:29Based on
31:30Those deeper qualities
31:31And like
31:32The more meaningful things
31:33And
31:34I want you guys
31:35To also
31:37Have that opportunity
31:38Yeah
31:39But I just want
31:40That to come
31:41At a later stage
31:42Yeah
31:43I just want to make sure
31:44You're thinking realistically
31:45Like
31:46I am
31:47The age is going to
31:48Make a
31:48Right
31:49A big difference
31:50When you're out
31:50Of this whole experience
31:51No I
31:52Trust me
31:53It's a huge
31:55Thought
32:00Not telling the age
32:02Is definitely a little weird
32:03But I would say
32:04I think
32:04John is probably
32:05More around 35
32:06If John were younger
32:07Than about 30
32:08It would definitely
32:08Be more of like
32:10A surprise to me
32:11And definitely
32:12More of a weirder thing
32:13Just cause like
32:14We're maybe even
32:15Closer to age
32:16Than she is
32:16So that's
32:17Definitely a little strange
32:18He seems really into her
32:21Which I think
32:22That's a good sign
32:23That they have
32:24Great chemistry
32:25But I want to
32:26Protect my mom
32:27Obviously
32:27Cause she's been
32:28In hard relationships
32:30For the past
32:3010 years
32:32But I do think
32:33Realistically
32:33There's a lot
32:34Of other things
32:35That come with
32:36The age difference
32:37And I think
32:39Time will tell
32:39If it really
32:40Will be able to
32:41Work out
32:42In the long run
32:50How are you feeling
32:52Ma'am
32:53Um
32:55Talk to me
32:57Honestly
32:58Pretty bad
32:59Okay
33:03I think
33:06Maybe I've been
33:08A little bit
33:10Overly optimistic
33:12About things
33:15I guess
33:16Okay
33:17Um
33:20Okay
33:21Like
33:21This whole time
33:22I've been telling
33:23Myself
33:24I'm like
33:25I'm moving
33:26Because I want
33:26To move
33:27I'm moving
33:28Because I don't
33:28Want to be
33:28Which is true
33:29I don't want
33:29To be in Seattle
33:30I don't want
33:30To be there
33:31But like
33:32I'm moving
33:33To basically
33:34Be with you
33:35Like that is
33:37That is the truth
33:38Of the matter
33:38Like that's
33:39What I'm doing
33:42And
33:45I have always
33:46Told myself
33:48I will
33:48I will
33:49I will not
33:50Change my life
33:50For a man
33:51Which
33:52I think
33:53My big struggle
33:54Right now
33:55Is like
33:55Am I betraying
33:57Myself
33:59By giving up
34:00Everything
34:01For a relationship
34:02And
34:04I'm having
34:05A hard time
34:06With my own
34:08Personal
34:09Values
34:10Okay
34:12Um
34:13I also think
34:14Sometimes I just
34:16Don't need
34:17To hear
34:18Like
34:18Oh everything's
34:20Gonna be fine
34:21Because it's
34:22Not helpful
34:24Um
34:25Because it's
34:26Like
34:28I'm
34:29I'm like
34:30Like giving up
34:32Everything
34:34Which like
34:35And you're
34:36It's not like
34:37You're not
34:39But
34:40Like I am
34:42And it's like
34:43I don't
34:45Like
34:45Like put
34:47Yourself
34:47In that
34:48Position
34:49Like
34:50I'm not
34:51Only
34:51Leaving
34:52Everybody
34:52And everything
34:54I've worked
34:54For
34:55But I'm
34:56Also
34:57Going against
34:58My own
34:59Values
34:59To do
35:00That
35:01Which is
35:02Not to
35:02Say that
35:03I'm not
35:03Going to
35:04Or that's
35:05Not gonna
35:06Be worth
35:06It
35:07But sitting
35:08Here
35:10Now
35:10I'm like
35:13What the
35:13Fuck am I
35:14Doing
35:14What the
35:15Fuck am I
35:16Doing
35:22Sorry
35:23That's like
35:23Not very
35:25Positive
35:26Or kind
35:27But
35:28No it's
35:29Real
35:29I want you
35:30To be honest
35:31And real
35:34I'm just
35:35Like
35:38I'm just
35:39Scared
35:39I understand
35:42I understand
35:42I think
35:43That
35:45Uncertainty
35:46Being scared
35:46That's
35:47Normal
35:48And I know
35:49That that's
35:49Extremely
35:50Uncomfortable
35:50For you
35:51And I know
35:52It's like
35:52Well
35:52Derek that's
35:54Easy for you
35:54To say
35:54Because you're
35:55Not the one
35:55Making
35:56That sacrifice
35:57I get
35:57I get
35:58All of that
35:59There is
36:00There is
36:00There is
36:00Not
36:01Like some
36:02Word
36:03Or magic
36:04Formula
36:04That I
36:05Can say
36:05To just
36:05Make
36:05All that
36:06Go away
36:07That's
36:07Just gonna
36:07Be an
36:07Element
36:08Of it
36:10But
36:10Change
36:11Is
36:11Not
36:12That
36:12Always
36:13You know
36:13Change
36:14Just
36:14More
36:15Of
36:15Like
36:16Evolving
36:17And so
36:18Still have
36:19Your friends
36:19You'll
36:20Have me
36:21You'll have
36:21Your relationship
36:22You'll have
36:23New friends
36:23You'll
36:24Eventually
36:24You know
36:24Whether you
36:25Change a
36:25Career
36:2625 times
36:27It doesn't
36:27Matter
36:28Like you
36:28Don't have
36:28To know
36:29All the
36:29Answers
36:29Right
36:29Now
36:30You don't
36:30Have
36:30To
36:30Move
36:31Like
36:31I don't
36:31I don't
36:32I don't
36:33Want to
36:33Stress
36:33Personally
36:34Like
36:34Just
36:34Being
36:34Like
36:35Selfish
36:35I don't
36:36Want to
36:36Be
36:36Stressed
36:36Out
36:36Like
36:37Oh my
36:37God
36:37If I
36:37Have
36:37To
36:38Stress
36:38About
36:38This
36:38Like
36:38I
36:38Need
36:39You
36:39To
36:39Be
36:40In
36:40A
36:40Peaceful
36:40State
36:41For
36:41Us
36:42Like
36:42That's
36:42How
36:42We'll
36:43Flourish
36:43Like
36:44Just
36:44Being
36:44Real
36:44So
36:46Mm
36:46Mm
36:47Mm
36:48What
36:52What
36:53What
36:54Say
36:59In
36:59Order
36:59For
37:00This
37:00Relationship
37:00To
37:00Work
37:01Starting
37:02Off
37:02You
37:03Need
37:03To
37:03Be
37:03Making
37:04This
37:04Decision
37:04From
37:05A
37:05Place
37:05Of
37:05Peace
37:07Is
37:07That
37:07Correct
37:11Okay
37:14I
37:26Tried
37:27To
37:27Keep
37:27It
37:27Simple
37:28Simple
37:29Never
37:30Picks
37:30You
37:30This
37:31Can't
37:33Resist
37:34No
37:35I
37:37Thought
37:37I
37:38Have
37:38A
37:38This
37:38Beautiful
37:39It's
37:40Now
37:40I
37:41Never
37:41Kiss
37:43So
37:44Excited
37:44To
37:44See
37:45Everyone
37:46Can't
37:47Waste
37:48Another
37:48Minute
37:49Without
37:50A
37:50Leap
37:51Of
37:52Faith
37:52Look at
37:54this
37:54You
37:55Guys
37:55Like
37:56You
37:56Guys
37:57Are
37:57Glowing
37:57Over
37:57Here
38:02Hey
38:05Guys
38:07Hi
38:08Honey
38:08I miss you
38:09So much
38:10She looks so
38:11Beautiful
38:11Yeah
38:14Hey guys
38:15How are you
38:17What's up
38:17Hi
38:18What's up buddy
38:32What's up buddy
38:46And I'm very
38:47And I'm very
38:47Appreciate it
38:48Together apart
38:48Dang
38:48I agree
38:50I love it
38:50Cheers
38:51Cheers
38:52Cheers
38:53Cheers
38:54Cheers
38:54You guys
38:54Together
38:54Better
38:55Apart
38:56Together
38:57Hello
38:59Oh
39:02Hey
39:04Hey
39:06How are you all doing?
39:08We're great.
39:09How are you doing?
39:10We're great.
39:11We're doing great.
39:11It's not about us.
39:12It's not?
39:13We're already in love.
39:14We're married.
39:14We have a baby.
39:15Okay, okay.
39:17So last time we saw you, we dropped a little surprise.
39:20Letting you all know that your friends and family were on the way.
39:24So no more surprises.
39:25That's more of a bomb, not a surprise.
39:28That was a bomb.
39:29Well, and just like that, this relationship wasn't just yours anymore.
39:33Yeah.
39:33To say the least.
39:34You had to open it up to opinions, to pressure, and to judgment.
39:39That's true.
39:40And it affected all of you in different ways.
39:43Teresa?
39:44I know when we kind of dropped that bomb, I couldn't help but notice some nervousness.
39:50Yeah.
39:50I was horrified, scared, and I wasn't expecting it to happen the way it did.
39:56Obviously, your kids are older.
39:58They're, you know, I think...
39:59Well, I mean, I'm very protective of my kids.
40:01Okay.
40:03However, John was extremely poised and very articulate.
40:09And they asked some great, hard questions.
40:11And he answered them, you know, like a baller.
40:14And it was great.
40:16Was his age one of the questions that your kids asked?
40:19Well, I was like, yeah, no, no.
40:21Oh, you didn't tell?
40:22No, they don't know.
40:24Oh.
40:25So they never told...
40:26And they won't know for a while.
40:27Oh.
40:28Until I decide.
40:31What's your reasoning for not telling your kids his age?
40:34Because there is a gigantic double standard.
40:39If he was my age and I was his age, there would be such a lesser of a problem.
40:44And so I'm going into this as, you know, really in a difficult position.
40:50Because there will be a lot of judgment, not on only me, but my kids probably, their friends, our community,
40:56all of that.
40:57And if we're being real, like, and we want to say, like, age doesn't matter, then why should I have
41:03to reveal it right now?
41:04Why shouldn't I be able to let them get to know him before I say, you know, by the way,
41:11he's, like, in your age range?
41:14Like, that's going to be awkward.
41:17Leah, you've been pretty expressive over there.
41:20Well, because the whole point of this journey is to let everyone's family know how old were the people that
41:26were dating.
41:27That's the whole point of it.
41:28So I didn't know that there was a choice.
41:29That will come.
41:29I mean, it doesn't have to happen when somebody else tells me it has to happen.
41:33But it's going to happen regardless.
41:36Yeah, of course.
41:37Why hide it now?
41:39Like, he's 27.
41:41I'm not hiding it.
41:41I think he's 27, right?
41:42I'm trying to be strategic in letting my kids get to know him as I did.
41:48They will find out when they find out.
41:51And it's nobody's choice or decision to do that except for he and I.
41:56I just thought, like, we had to divulge it at the end of the day.
41:59You know, I thought that was the whole goal.
42:00It was like, we're not ashamed of it.
42:02I'm not ashamed of how old he is.
42:04I'm not ashamed of it.
42:05Yeah.
42:06I just need some water.
42:07It's really none of your business.
42:08It's not my business.
42:10It's not my business.
42:10It's going to come out one way or another.
42:12It's none of your business.
42:12Yeah.
42:13I understand.
42:16Sorry.
42:16No, I'm still going to have a voice.
42:18But it's just, I understand that you're coming from a different...
42:20Well, you can have your voice that goes in your head, not verbally.
42:22It's the voice that's going to be said.
42:24Well, I don't need to hear it.
42:26Oh, I'm sorry.
42:26It just got said.
42:29All I can say is don't fucking come for me because I will...
42:37All right, let's stay respectful, guys.
42:39We're good.
42:44I think for clarity, friends and family were coming to meet the person that you committed
42:50to.
42:50And how many of those details you include is up to you.
43:04You shared space.
43:06You shared lives.
43:08You faced judgment.
43:11And you found ways to stay connected.
43:13But now, it's decision time.
43:18Tonight is your last night together.
43:22Tomorrow morning, you will wake up next to the person you've lived a life with here.
43:27But then, you have to say goodbye.
43:30Because from that moment on, you will be on your own.
43:34No more shared space.
43:36No more comfort in each other's presence.
43:39Just time to sit with your heart, your doubts, and your decision.
43:49The next time you see each other, it will be to speak your truth.
43:53And to decide, do we move forward together or do we walk away?
43:59Each of you will make one final journey to a mountaintop overlooking a place where it all began.
44:06Up there, you'll stand face to face and ask, do you keep those promise rings and commit to taking this
44:14leap together?
44:15Or do you take them off and choose a different path, alone?
44:24It sucks.
44:31You've all got a lot to think about.
44:37It's just not fair.
44:49You're 22.
44:51I'm 38.
44:53That's a big gap.
44:55The truth is, no matter how much I doubt the age gap, I don't doubt the way I feel when
45:04I'm with you.
45:06If we were to stay together, I may regret it for the rest of my life.
45:12I'll always protect you, and I'll always protect your hearts.
45:16Piper, I truly love you.
45:18I'll let go and I'll see you again.
45:20It's a huge commitment to say that this person who's 27 years younger than me is my boyfriend.
45:29I need you to believe that age is just a number, but also believe in me that every day I'm
45:35going to show up and work on this together.
45:37I love you.
45:40I can't see myself growing with you.
45:43You lit something inside of me that I thought was gone.
45:47I think we've both made a decision that will impact our lives and our families, and I just hope and
45:52pray that it's the right one.
45:54He's like in the prime of his life right now, honestly.
45:58And why would he give that up for someone 20 years older than him?
46:02This is a card you break up with.
46:04I hate the promise ring back.
46:34I'm waiting for the sign.
46:35What would it be such a cry to look at this as a sign?
46:47I'm trying again one more time.
46:53So I'll step to the sun up?
47:26¡SuscrÃbete al canal!
47:55Gracias por ver el video.
48:25Gracias por ver el video.
48:55Gracias por ver el video.
48:57Gracias por ver el video.
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