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Something Very Bad Is Going To Happen Season 1 Episode 5
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FunTranscript
00:29Transcription by CastingWords
00:32Thanks for the ride and everything.
00:38So, uh, what the fuck are you gonna do now?
00:44I'm gonna smile my face off at the rehearsal dinner tonight
00:48and surround my wedding day tomorrow
00:50and, you know, live happily ever after
00:52because he is my soulmate.
00:56Yeah.
00:57Well, I think you might be in denial.
01:03You're 100% sure he's your soulmate?
01:05Yeah.
01:07We have fate on our side.
01:10I mean, pure fate, the way that we met
01:11and lots of other things.
01:15We have a great relationship,
01:16so, yeah, I'm gonna...
01:17I'm gonna be fine.
01:21Just give me a percentage.
01:2475, 80.
01:28Hey, you made us all stand around
01:29telling a creepy stick doll about our feelings.
01:3792.
01:39Okay.
01:40Okay.
01:41Okay.
01:42So you'd get on a plane if the pilot was like,
01:46welcome aboard, ladies and gentlemen.
01:48There's a 92% chance we may get to our destination.
01:53I would trust my gut,
01:55and Nikki would too,
01:56and I know that.
01:57For a fact.
01:59Just maybe, you know,
02:01maybe get that number up to 100
02:03before you walk down the aisle.
02:05Yeah.
02:05Great.
02:06Thanks.
02:07Okay.
02:07Okay.
02:07I'm not gonna die.
02:10All right.
02:13Good night.
02:14It's fucking morning.
02:44I'm not gonna die.
03:05Where have you been?
03:15Do you believe in curses?
03:43I had a dream you were a tarantula,
03:45and you're mad at me.
03:49And then you were you again,
03:53and then you were really,
03:55really mad at me,
03:56and then you left me at the altar.
04:02I would never do that to you.
04:04Mm-hmm.
04:07Are you gonna turn into a giant spider, though?
04:11I'm gonna try really hard not to.
04:26You were the one person for me.
04:30You were the one.
04:33Of course.
04:34I feel the same way.
04:35No.
04:36I'm serious.
04:37No.
04:39What your mom said about you,
04:41about your soul,
04:44it's so pure and perfect,
04:47and I'm never gonna let anything happen to it
04:51because your soul is mine.
04:53Because your soul is mine,
04:53and mine is yours, okay?
04:55We're good.
04:56We are incredible.
04:58We're the best guy.
04:59We know.
05:02What's up with you?
05:03Don't you agree?
05:04No, I completely agree.
05:05Okay, then why are you like it?
05:07I'm just like it.
05:10You're just...
05:11You're so...
05:13Honest?
05:21We are soulmates.
05:24So it doesn't matter.
05:29What doesn't matter?
05:49It's impossible.
05:54Tell the sun to leave the sky.
05:57It's just impossible.
06:07Ask a baby not to cry.
06:11It's just impossible.
06:17Can I hold you closer to me
06:24and not feel you going through me?
06:31Split the second
06:34That I never think of you
06:37Oh, how impossible
06:45Can the ocean
06:48Keep from rushing to the shore?
06:51It's just impossible
06:58If I had you
07:02Could I ever want for more?
07:05It's just impossible
07:14Could you ask me for the world?
07:19It's just impossible
07:19I would sell my very soul
07:25And not regret it
07:29Should you ask me for the world
07:32Somehow I'd get it
07:34I would sell my very soul
07:38Can the ocean
07:42Keep from rushing to the shore?
07:45It's just impossible
07:50Good afternoon, our beloved family
07:55We would like to welcome you all here
07:58Those who've come from near
08:00And from far
08:03To celebrate our son Nicky
08:05And his lovely bride, Rachel
08:09I would like to take this opportunity
08:10To tell a story
08:12About the love
08:13That created you
08:15Because neither of you would be here
08:17If it weren't for you and me
08:29Some will spend their entire lifetimes
08:33Asking themselves
08:33What makes two people soulmates?
08:36I can tell you this
08:37With absolute certainty
08:38I found my soulmate
08:41By a stroke of luck
08:42Some may even call it fate
08:45I was an intern at the time
08:47In fact, I had just completed
08:49A 30-hour shift
08:51When something tells me
08:52That I shouldn't leave just yet
08:53Something tells me
08:55That I need to go back
08:56And say goodbye to my buddy Beau
08:57Who was just starting his shift in the ER
08:59I hear this angry voice yelling at me
09:03I turn around
09:05And there is the most gorgeous woman
09:07I had ever seen staring at me
09:09And what was this gorgeous woman saying?
09:15She was saying
09:18And you put it back on
09:22And what a sight
09:23This beautiful woman is standing there
09:25With a bloody dish towel
09:26Wrapped around her finger
09:27Saying she'd nearly sliced it off
09:29And she'd been waiting there all night
09:31Yes, we go back into the ER
09:33And I'm starting to wonder
09:34Does this man even work here?
09:37You know, I convinced myself
09:38Because he's got the hospital badge
09:39He's got the scrubs
09:40So I think he must at least be a doctor
09:43Well, yeah
09:44But I'm not an ER doctor
09:46Though I had done a rotation
09:48In emergency medicine
09:49So I'm racking my brain
09:50Trying to remember what to do
09:52I take her to an exam room
09:54And I start gluing her finger back together
09:55Which is going surprisingly well
09:57Oh, it was so painful
09:58And I start to think
09:59This guy really doesn't know
10:01What the hell he's doing
10:02But you stayed
10:03Well, you were cute
10:04And I was bleeding
10:07And just a short while later
10:08I took that same finger
10:10And I put a ring on it
10:11I still can't feel the tip of it, though
10:13Don't tell them that
10:15It's okay
10:16I'd make the same trade again
10:18And again to have you
10:21So
10:23Here we are
10:24Here all of you are
10:26And tonight
10:27I would like you
10:29To share your wisdom
10:30With our newest soldiers
10:31On the war path
10:32To holy matrimony
10:35Please, join me
10:37In raising a glass
10:38With a happy couple
10:39To fate
10:41And pretending you can do something
10:43Even if you can't
10:44As long as it's in the name of love
10:47Cheers
10:50Alright, please
10:52Let's enjoy the party
10:53I love that story
10:55My mother told us
10:56The best thing you can do
10:57Before you decide to marry someone
10:58Is go through something traumatic together
11:00How will you find out
11:01Who the other person really is?
11:03It's essential
11:04But what if nothing traumatic happens?
11:08Or did you go through something traumatic
11:10Together on purpose?
11:11Oh, no, we didn't need to
11:12Frank's mother died in front of us
11:15Has anyone died in front of you?
11:19Uh, kind of
11:22What about you and Nikki together?
11:26No, no one's ever
11:27Died in front of us together
11:29Well, yeah, two days
11:32Excuse me
11:33Rachel, Rachel
11:35Oh, there you are
11:38Sorry
11:38Have you met our cousin Kiki?
11:41She's on a lot of Xanax
11:42Kiki
11:43There she is
11:45Wow
11:46Okay, I love your look
11:48It's so edgy
11:49Oh
11:49Please
11:51Rachel's a psychiatrist
11:52Oh, no, I'm
11:53You are
11:54What do I have?
11:55Sorry, that
11:56What do you have of what?
11:58I want a second opinion
11:59You don't have to diagnose her right here in public
12:00You can tell me later in private
12:02This is my husband, Doug
12:04We're childhood sweethearts
12:05We met at Columbia
12:06Hi
12:07Where did you meet Nikki?
12:08Oh, it's such a good story
12:09It's almost as good as my parents
12:11It's like cosmic fate
12:13Um, okay
12:14Tell them the story
12:15Okay
12:16So, um, a couple years ago
12:19I was traveling all over the country
12:21Interviewing for graduate programs
12:23And my last interview was at UT Austin
12:26And I had this terrible feeling all day
12:29But I forced myself to go to the interview
12:31But the feeling is just, like, growing and growing
12:34And, like, suffocating me
12:36Anyway, by the time I get to the airport
12:38It was just completely overwhelming
12:40I'm at the gate
12:42And I'm standing in line to board the plane
12:45And it suddenly hits me
12:47This
12:48This is the bad thing
12:50If I get on this plane
12:55Something's
12:55How did you know that?
13:03I can't explain it
13:04I just knew
13:04And then I started really freaking out
13:07So I'm watching all these people get on the plane
13:09And
13:11I'm totally paralyzed
13:13Eventually I'm the only one left
13:16And the gate agent is, like, getting on the intercom
13:18Looking straight at me
13:20Saying
13:20Final boarding
13:21Last call
13:22All ticketed passengers
13:23But you weren't the last one, right?
13:27No
13:29There was one other person
13:33This
13:33Guy
13:35This
13:36Cute
13:37Guy
13:38And I thought
13:39Fuck
13:39It's so sad
13:40That this cute guy is going to perish
13:42With everyone else
13:42On this duty flight
13:44Final
13:45Final
13:46Boarding
13:46And I, at this point, haven't moved
13:48In, like, 20 minutes
13:49And the gate agent
13:50Is
13:51All pissed off
13:52And the cute guy
13:54Notices me
13:55And he walks to where I'm standing
13:58And he says
14:00Are you okay?
14:01And normally I'd be like
14:02Yeah
14:03I'm fine
14:04Like, go away
14:05But there was just something
14:08So inherently trustworthy
14:10About him
14:11I literally look at him
14:12And I say
14:13I'm gonna sound crazy
14:15But
14:16I have a feeling
14:17That something that's gonna happen
14:18And I can't explain it
14:19Any more than that
14:20But I'm not getting on that plane
14:21And he
14:22Looks at me
14:24And with this
14:25Perfect
14:26Little smile
14:27He says
14:29Fuck it
14:31Let's drive
14:32No
14:33Yes
14:34Just like that
14:35Fuck it
14:35Let's drive
14:38At a moment's notice
14:40No questions asked
14:42He just trusted my feelings
14:44As real
14:46It's like
14:46Like magic
14:48Oh, it's not even the best part
14:49Oh my god
14:50Tell me the best part
14:52Stop being Jules, Jules
14:54Tell them the line
14:55So
14:56The door is closed
14:58And we are officially
14:59On this journey together
15:01And
15:01I thank him
15:02You know
15:03For doing this
15:04And he
15:06Looks at me
15:07And he says
15:09I think you just saved my life
15:13Tears
15:14I know
15:14When was this?
15:16Hmm?
15:17When was this?
15:18Three years ago
15:19When exactly?
15:21Crazy
15:21Uh, February
15:22Why does that matter?
15:24So did the plane crash?
15:25Who gives a shit, Doug?
15:26Rachel
15:26Rachel
15:27There's someone I want to introduce you to
15:29Okay
15:29Oh
15:30Sorry
15:31Bye
15:32Lovely to meet you both
15:34Just through here
15:37You okay?
15:38You okay?
15:39Yeah
15:43Mmm
15:45I'm not actually introducing you to anyone
15:47Oh
15:48You looked in need of saving
15:49No?
15:51No
15:51I was actually
15:53Thriving
15:55Thriving?
15:55Oh you were?
15:56Oh okay
16:00Do you want to talk about it?
16:02Talk about what?
16:05What's your percentage now?
16:07I don't know what you're talking about
16:08I don't know what you're talking about
16:10I don't know what you're talking about
16:11I don't know what you're talking about
16:11You told him?
16:17No he doesn't need to know
16:18If it's not going to be a problem
16:19And it's not a problem
16:21Because
16:22A soulmate
16:22Is
16:23Fated
16:25Right?
16:25Our souls are connected
16:26And then they split apart
16:27And
16:28The way that we met
16:30I mean
16:30The odds
16:32The fucking odds
16:33Of all people
16:34I've met
16:35In all the circumstances
16:36I mean
16:37If there is such thing
16:38As a soulmate
16:39Then
16:40Yes
16:41Nikki
16:41Is my soulmate
16:43Okay
16:45And also because
16:47I love him
16:48Okay
16:53Okay
16:53You don't have to believe me
16:59Do you believe you?
17:00Yes I do
17:01Yes
17:02You do
17:02Okay
17:03I do
17:06I mean
17:07I'd take like
17:07One fucking sign
17:08From the universe
17:08That confirms
17:09That Nikki
17:09Is my soulmate
17:10So I don't fucking die
17:10At the altar
17:11But yes
17:12I do
17:20It's not coming
17:23That's funny
17:24How about a drink?
17:25Ah yes
17:27By the time
17:28I was at the airport
17:28I was just suffocated
17:30With this feeling
17:31I couldn't bring myself
17:33To get on the plane
17:33I just knew that
17:34Something very bad
17:35The gate agent is like
17:36Final boarding
17:37Last call
17:37All ticketed passengers
17:39And I'm totally paralyzed
17:42Like I haven't moved in
17:4420-25 minutes
17:45And this cute guy
17:47It's too bad that he's gonna perish
17:49With everyone else on this due flight
17:53And so I look at the gate agent
17:55And she's looking at me
17:56And she's all pissed off
17:57And I notice the guy
17:58The cute guy
17:59And fuck it
18:00Let's drive
18:05Sorry I already said this to you
18:07Like repeating myself
18:08I think you just saved my life
18:09I think you just saved my life
18:11I think you just saved my life
18:13I think you just saved my life
18:16Wow that's so amazing
18:18So is this the fate thing?
18:21This story you're fated meeting
18:23The reason you think Nikki's your soulmate
18:27Yes
18:27A city that neither of us live in
18:30We happen to be on the same flight
18:32And he understands my inexplicable dread
18:36Enough to drive me across the country
18:37Honestly it's so romantic
18:39Like truly right out of a movie
18:41But also kind of creepy
18:42I mean he was a stranger right?
18:45It's not creepy at all
18:46Yeah it would have been creepy
18:47If you weren't getting married
18:48But they are
18:49So it's just romantic
18:50Why was Nikki in Austin anyway?
18:52I think that he was visiting a friend from college
18:55Which friend?
18:56Your kiss
19:00Something doesn't add up
19:03What doesn't add up?
19:05Can you stop picking holes in the story?
19:07It's a good story
19:10Where did you guys meet?
19:11Hi
19:11Hi
19:13Speaking
19:14Hi
19:14So my aunt Valerie is begging to meet you
19:18She said she has some very important marital advice for us
19:20Oh
19:20Marital advice
19:22Yeah
19:22Okay
19:23Oh
19:24Nice to meet you
19:25Hi good to meet you
19:29Oh my god
19:29Oh my god
19:30Oh my god
19:30Do you see this stop?
19:31Behind me see this caver?
19:32That's the guy who hit me at the rest stop
19:35The one who left his baby in the car
19:37What?
19:38Yeah I know
19:38Turns out we went to elementary school together
19:40He's actually uh
19:41No he's
19:42No he's a nice guy
19:47He's a nice guy
19:48And it works every time
19:50So you uh
19:51You get into an argument
19:52And you're both frustrated
19:54And you come to a standstill
19:55It works like a charm
19:57Because it tells the truth
19:59You've got nowhere to hide
20:01It's so simple
20:02Here it is
20:03Five minutes
20:05Five minutes
20:06Of uninterrupted
20:07Eye contact
20:09Oh okay
20:10Yeah that
20:11That sounds
20:12Effective
20:13Yeah
20:13Go ahead
20:14Look you'll see
20:14Oh right now
20:15Yeah yeah
20:16Sure
20:16In the middle of the party
20:17Sure sure sure
20:18Five minutes
20:18Eye contact only
20:20No talking
20:21Don't look away
20:21I'll time you
20:23Okay
20:23You ready
20:24Three
20:25Two
20:26One
20:27Go
21:20Who's the friend you were visiting
21:21In Austin
21:22When we met
21:22My college roommate
21:24Chris
21:26You met Chris
21:27He's the one
21:27Who's allergic to everything
21:28You're ruining it
21:30By talking
21:31Don't talking
21:32Eye contact only
21:33No don't look at me
21:34Oh okay
21:35Okay
21:35Starting over
21:37Starting
21:37Three
21:38Two
21:39One
21:40Go
21:41Two
21:42He's the one
21:46Free
21:47He's the one
21:51He's the one
21:58In the middle
21:59Aunque
22:04He's the one
22:06Vit ability
22:09He's the only
22:09He's the one
22:09Healing
22:09Why the
22:09Ho
22:09quarantine
22:09I'm sua
22:10kop
22:34what happened let's dance yes you want to dance yeah but you only did two minutes
22:40i don't know how to dance to this well shouldn't we learn how to dance properly we never dance
22:45properly just do what they're doing i don't care what anybody tells me it's all about the sex
22:53gotta keep that spark alive do whatever it takes i mean whatever it takes add some body
23:07these are divisive times we live in it's just so nice to remember what it's actually all about
23:14love i'm sorry it was a question again you were just telling us a secret too
23:30that's
23:43You are my destiny.
23:51You are what you are to me.
23:58You are my destiny.
24:02You know, making your grandfather proud from the great beyond?
24:05Oh, God.
24:06Yes.
24:07Yeah, you know, I hope so.
24:09So when are you going to tell us this famous story we keep hearing about?
24:12The story of how you and Nicky met.
24:14Oh, yeah.
24:15Well, a couple of years ago I was flying all around the country.
24:35What are you doing?
24:37I'm Instagram stalking.
24:39Who?
24:40I'm trying to find girl Nicky.
24:42I'm pretty sure she was from Austin.
24:44Who?
24:46Girl Nicky, you know?
24:48The girl Nicky dated after that girl, Molly, and then before Rachel.
24:54Why?
24:57Something isn't adding up.
24:59What was your last name?
25:00Do you remember?
25:02Do you remember?
25:03Come with me.
25:06No.
25:08Yeah?
25:09No?
25:09Yeah?
25:10No.
25:11Hey.
25:14Why are you so obsessed with this story?
25:18Because Rachel's fucking cursed.
25:20What's that got to do with it?
25:22Why?
25:22I am on Washington.
25:23Bye.
25:24She clearly thinks this stupid romantic story proves that they're meant to be together and
25:28that it's going to save her life.
25:30But I think there's more to it.
25:32And I need to prove it.
25:33I need to-
25:34What?
25:36So she doesn't die.
25:37Sorry behind you.
25:37Yeah, we go.
25:41So she doesn't die like her mother did.
25:44But why is that your problem?
25:46Because her dying mother told me to prevent the same thing from happening to her so I have
25:51to try.
25:54This can't be your burden.
25:57But I was there.
25:59You shouldn't have been.
26:00But I was.
26:03Maybe.
26:04I was there for a reason.
26:06You know?
26:07It all makes sense now.
26:10It's not a fake monster story.
26:13It's real fucking horror.
26:15What I saw back then fucked me up.
26:20You wanted me to do something about it.
26:23Now I can do something about it.
26:26And it's this.
26:30It's fine that you don't believe in it.
26:33But I saw it with my own eyes.
26:45Carl Nicky's last name is Stuart I think.
26:49And just try not to like ruin the party with him.
26:52Take down very much.
27:03I'm the only one left and the gate agent is getting on the intercom and she's looking
27:06straight at me.
27:07And she's saying final boarding, last call, all ticketed passengers and-
27:11You forgot the cute guy.
27:12Oh right.
27:14Yes.
27:14Sorry.
27:15Just me and this cute guy.
27:17And, um, the gate agent is just saying my name over and over and over and over again.
27:24And then the cute guy comes over and-
27:25Why weren't they calling his name too?
27:27Hmm?
27:28You-
27:28You keep saying you were the last two passengers.
27:32But they were only calling your name.
27:35Ignore him.
27:36Keep going.
27:36So he comes over and he says-
27:38I, uh-
27:39You've never wondered?
27:41No, Jules.
27:43I've never even thought about it.
27:45Well, he's right here.
27:47We can ask him now.
27:49What-
27:50What are you doing right now?
27:51What are you-
27:52Just- Can I just wait?
27:52I'm just trying to understand the story.
27:54I don't get why they weren't also calling your name.
27:57It's weird.
27:57I don't know why.
27:58But it doesn't make sense.
28:00Let's get a drink.
28:01Let's get a drink.
28:02Hey, I have a drink.
28:03Hey.
28:05I want to know.
28:10Nikki.
28:15Okay.
28:16It was February 15th, right?
28:18The day you met?
28:19Uh, yes.
28:20Dude, shh.
28:21Oh my God.
28:21What am I going to-
28:22See, I was confused because I thought you two met March.
28:26But then she said February.
28:28And that confused me more because I thought you were dating girl Nikki in February 2023.
28:33So, I checked her Instagram.
28:36And yeah, she posted you on Valentine's Day that year.
28:39And also, you must have been dating girl Nikki because you were going to bring her to our wedding.
28:45Which was on February 15th.
28:47The wedding you skipped.
28:49Which was not in-
28:50Where were you flying to?
28:53Chicago.
28:54It was not in Chicago.
28:55It was in California.
28:58So, I'm doing the math and I guess what really happened is that you were in Austin with girl Nikki.
29:05And she dumped you either on Valentine's Day or the day after.
29:08That's enough.
29:08So, she must have dumped you right before you were both supposed to fly to our wedding.
29:12And you didn't get on the plane.
29:15Maybe because you were too ashamed to go to our wedding alone.
29:20I don't know.
29:21But you must have sat in that airport all day.
29:24Moping around.
29:26Looking for someone to save you.
29:28Because you're too codependent to be single for more than two minutes.
29:31And then you found her.
29:33An escape hatch.
29:35All this time, I thought you missed my wedding because you had the stomach flu.
29:39And that you met her like a month later.
29:42But actually, you lied to both of us.
29:47So, that's why they weren't calling his name.
29:51Because he wasn't on the flight.
30:03Your soulmate's a liar.
30:06How sure are you now?
30:09Fifteen percent.
30:12Want to talk about fate?
30:14How about the way you and I met?
30:16Okay, you can shut up.
30:17At your birth.
30:17You can shut up now.
30:18Shut up.
30:19Nikki.
30:20Why don't you take Rachel to meet Uncle Lee?
30:23I'm just saying.
30:24That's fate.
30:25Not this.
30:26Thank you, Jules.
30:27I think I just saved your life.
30:31Shut the fuck up, Jules!
30:32Daddy, do you know me?
30:34Jesus Christ!
30:35Get off!
30:36Get off!
30:37Get off!
30:38Get off!
30:39Oh!
30:54I'm so sorry.
30:55What the fuck was that?
30:56I am so sorry.
30:57I had lied to you.
30:59You lied to me about so many things.
31:02Oh, sorry.
31:03I shouldn't have done that.
31:04I should have just been up front with you back then.
31:05You lied to me today, Nikki.
31:07I asked you why you were in Austin.
31:09You said you were visiting your fucking college roommate.
31:12Okay, I know.
31:12But I did see him on that trip too.
31:16Rachel, does it really matter that I wasn't so sorry?
31:19I wasn't supposed to be on that flight.
31:20We still had the best adventure.
31:23We wouldn't have met otherwise.
31:24We wouldn't be here right now.
31:26We'd be strangers.
31:26So who cares if I was on the flight or not?
31:29It does matter, Nikki.
31:31It does matter because I finally thought that I met someone
31:34who felt the same things as me.
31:36But no!
31:38It turns out that you were just sad and single
31:40and you saw a scared girl at the airport and said,
31:42Oh, fun!
31:43An adventure!
31:44Well, I am not a fucking adventure for you to go on.
31:47Come on, Rachel.
31:47We're getting married.
31:48It doesn't matter anymore.
31:50The exact scenario under which we met.
31:53Nikki, did you invite my dad to the wedding?
32:02Do not lie to me.
32:09Why?
32:10But it doesn't matter.
32:11He didn't respond.
32:12He isn't coming.
32:13Why would you do that, Nikki?
32:15Fuck, I'm sorry.
32:15I regretted it immediately, but...
32:17You didn't have anyone coming.
32:19And my parents kept asking me and asking me and...
32:23I was afraid that you'd look back someday and wish he'd been here.
32:28My fucking psychotic father who I haven't spoken to in 11 years.
32:32It was a huge mistake, okay?
32:34I knew it was wrong.
32:35I'm sorry.
32:37Rachel, I just...
32:38I just want to be with you.
32:40I'm sorry.
32:41I'm so sorry.
32:41I'm sorry I'm fucking up so much.
32:43I'm sorry.
32:43Is it true that you got out of a relationship the day we met?
32:55So I'm like a rebound.
32:59You're not a rebound.
33:00I'm like a rebound.
33:01Rachel, we're getting married.
33:04You're not a rebound!
33:13We are still getting married, right?
33:23You'd seriously consider throwing away everything that happened after that day?
33:28All of the love and trust that we have now because I didn't think the plane was going down when
33:33I met you.
33:33Yeah, well, maybe I shouldn't have saved your life that day.
33:35Oh, yeah, well, you didn't. The plane didn't fucking crash.
33:43Hi.
33:44So sorry to interrupt, but dinner is served by candlelight. Very romantic.
33:50Maybe it'll help change Earl's attitude.
33:53Put on a happy face. Rachel, you're wearing a T-shirt.
33:56You're wearing... You can't wear that.
33:57I genuinely don't give a fuck.
33:58Oh, my gosh. She is so mean. She looks poor.
34:02Portia, you can't say that.
34:03Okay, why not?
34:06Okay, why not?
34:21Oh, dear.
34:26Can you just get me?
34:32Hi.
34:49Hi.
34:50Hi. I just wanted to apologize on behalf of myself and my fiancé for what happened earlier.
34:59We really do appreciate you all being here, and we did not intend to put on a show, but hey,
35:05free show.
35:09I wanted to tell another story quickly, a different story.
35:13So I'm going to die on Sunday.
35:21It's not a joke, really.
35:24There is a horrible, fucked-up curse that has plagued my bloodline for centuries,
35:29and if I don't marry my soulmate by sundown on Sunday, I will die.
35:34And if I don't get married, the curse will spread to his bloodline, which is like all of you.
35:43Sorry, Jules. I don't think I told you that part.
35:49I mean, put yourself in my position.
35:52Would you have married that person?
35:54What is she doing?
35:55Really? Think about it.
35:56Do you want me to stop her?
35:57But don't worry, because I wouldn't do that to you.
36:01That's enough. That's enough.
36:01It happened to my mother.
36:04She got married and died right over there, actually, on the other side of these woods.
36:09So I just found out that I was actually born in this place, which is actually kind of crazy,
36:13because now it appears I'm going to die here as well.
36:16So, yes, you are right.
36:18It is actually kind of like cosmic fate, Portia.
36:21So to echo your sentiment, Dr. Cunningham, here is one.
36:26Two feet.
36:38That was a plane crash.
36:47Please keep eating.
37:08My death, it haunts him like a sheep.
37:15Without a cell
37:21I know I'll be gone soon, but just for him
37:28I will prevail
37:33He doesn't like it when I cry
37:39He doesn't like it when I cry
37:45He doesn't like it when I cry
37:50And now he's gone, so I'm crying all the time
38:00Crying all the time
38:07My death, it haunts me like a sheep
38:14Without a cell
38:21I know I'll be gone soon, but just for him
38:27I will prevail
38:30I will prevail
38:32He doesn't like it when I cry
38:37He doesn't like it when I cry
38:38And now he's gone, so I'm crying all the time
38:47Crying all the time
38:49Crying all the time
38:53Crying all the time
39:06Crying all the time
39:11Crying all the time
39:24He doesn't like it when I cry
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