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Very Important People (2023) Season 3 Episode 9

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Transcript
00:00Hi, my name is Caitlin, and I'm going to be the next American Idol!
00:06Today, we're giving this comedian a total transformation.
00:10Shut up, Bailey.
00:11They have no idea who or what they're about to become.
00:15You can't award me.
00:16Once they see themselves in the mirror, they'll have to make up a character on the spot
00:20and then sit down with me for an improvised interview.
00:23Am I a goddess?
00:24This is Very Important, People.
00:32Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh my God.
00:37I don't have any eyebrows.
00:39Hello.
00:41Wait, wait.
00:42Oh my God, I look like Lance Bass.
00:45Wow, these are wild.
00:47This is so crazy.
00:49I'm from Ohio.
00:51I'm an EDM artist.
00:53You know, I'm going through a breakup.
00:55I really wanted to be a little low-key tonight.
00:58This is something I sort of pulled together.
01:01It's a mixture of death and rebirth.
01:04Am I making any sense?
01:05Is that, am I making sense?
01:19Okay, you guys gave me such wonderful compliments.
01:22I have decided to gift each one of you a compliment.
01:25You move things on this set.
01:27You are an editor.
01:28I love sort of that you are not afraid to come on when you need to come on
01:34and that you're not afraid to leave when it's time to leave.
01:37Hey, Vic, we really have to go.
01:38We're an hour behind.
01:39Noted.
01:41Okay.
01:41You know, I just think a lot of people are having trouble slowing down
01:44and the four of us taking our time, taking our breath.
01:48Okay, can we clear the set, please?
01:50Okay, so we're going to...
01:51Rolling, rolling.
01:51Guys, we're going to clear the set.
01:52Thank you for your time and thank you for your voice.
01:55I appreciate your voice.
01:57We all have a story to tell.
01:59And sometimes those stories need to be shared with the world.
02:01Good evening.
02:02I'm Vic Mikaela's back with another edition of Very Important People.
02:07Okay.
02:11Are you okay?
02:12Sorry, I had a sneeze.
02:14I'm sorry.
02:15Okay.
02:15Hello?
02:16Hello.
02:16Yes?
02:17Let's go ahead and take a seat here.
02:18Oh, dear God.
02:20Please introduce yourself.
02:21And stop.
02:26Stop.
02:27Stop.
02:28Stop.
02:28Stop.
02:29Stop.
02:29Yes?
02:29Okay, well, stop.
02:30It is so lovely to have you on the show today.
02:32When I saw your exhibit, pieces of frame...
02:34Do you want some water?
02:35I haven't had water in about 10 years, so...
02:38You haven't had water in 10 years?
02:39No.
02:40Okay.
02:41We also have sort of like an off-brand Sprite.
02:44Please stop talking so I can speak.
02:47Part of my exhibit going on right now is to put myself through a sense of turmoil.
02:56Yes?
02:58So I will have a sip of the water.
03:01We'll see if I die or not.
03:02Did you know that infants cannot have water or they will die?
03:06Yeah, I did know that.
03:07I did not know that.
03:08How did you find out?
03:10Okay.
03:11So I...
03:12I honestly...
03:12This is...
03:13Stop, please.
03:14Okay.
03:21That was brave.
03:23Okay.
03:24Do we have a medic maybe here somewhere?
03:26Okay.
03:27So I don't know how water is eliciting that reaction.
03:29I think you do need it to live.
03:32Okay.
03:33Okay.
03:33That went down quite well.
03:35Wow.
03:35Thank you so much.
03:36Thank you so much.
03:37No problem.
03:38Okay.
03:38Wow.
03:39Honestly, I've been such a fan of art for such a long time.
03:41I feel like being a part of the art is kind of exhilarating.
03:43Vic, can I please have some help?
03:45My God.
03:45Of course.
03:46And that's on me as host.
03:48I'm sort of the art curator of this set.
03:51Look at this.
03:51That's gorgeous.
03:52It looks like a dragon.
03:53Okay.
03:53Tape it off immediately before it dries.
03:55Please do tape.
03:56Yes.
03:57Here we go.
03:57And did you...
03:58And there we go.
03:59They're so long.
04:00Oh, thank you.
04:01I sort of let them grow out a little bit.
04:03Vic, please.
04:04Please.
04:04And I'm quiet.
04:06And I'm so quiet here.
04:07And I'm going to let the artist work.
04:08This is really incredible.
04:09I mean, very rarely do we get true artists on our set.
04:13I personally firmly believe that art is the soul of a society.
04:20You have a show coming up.
04:22I have this exhibit coming up in two weeks.
04:25One of my prized possessions I brought here was one of my first pieces.
04:30It is entitled Vacuous.
04:34You open the briefcase.
04:36And inside...
04:37Inside is a photo of the briefcase.
04:41Sure.
04:41I get it.
04:42It's about the thing you want is actually the thing inside, right?
04:44No.
04:45Okay.
04:46It's about a vacuousness that is within but above.
04:51And so here we are.
04:52That is one of the pieces from my art exhibit.
04:54Your publicist brought a few additional pieces for you to show off today.
04:57That was not cleared with me.
04:58I did not know that that was happening here.
05:00Okay.
05:01Well, then we don't have to show the pieces if you'd prefer not to.
05:03I mean, I don't want to be annoying.
05:04So I guess we have to now.
05:06It's fine.
05:07Okay.
05:07Well, and here's your first piece.
05:09Oh, yes.
05:10This is about something I love dearly, which is United States of America.
05:16Really?
05:17If there is one thing I love on this planet, it's Balenciaga and this goddamn country.
05:27So it's four flags.
05:29There are how many faces on Rushmore?
05:31Four.
05:32Oh, my God.
05:32The number four sort of transcends through all of the history of this incredible country
05:38that we live in.
05:39I get it.
05:39It's like the fact that we think we're the only one that has freedom, the one flag, except
05:43other countries have freedom, too.
05:44So there's multiple flags.
05:46We think we're alone, but actually, we're more alike.
05:48We are all together.
05:49We are all patriots.
05:53Patriots.
05:53Yes.
05:54I don't think I want to say that.
05:55I created these flags.
05:56Well, I bought them from a CVS and I took the tag off.
06:01What I like to do is I like to position them so they sort of somewhat resemble flowers because
06:07I think that to be a citizen in this beautiful nation is to be a flower blooming in a field.
06:12And correct me if I'm wrong, what I'm seeing here is, you know, these flags at the end of
06:16the day are made out of, okay, so, and then they fall sometimes and sometimes freedom fails, right?
06:21Yes.
06:21Freedom never fails, but sometimes they fall just because of the geometry of them being anchored
06:26in a shortcut.
06:26Okay, so we are sort of saying two different things.
06:28Oh, this is gorgeous.
06:29What is this?
06:30It's sort of a stepstool.
06:31I actually didn't know it opened.
06:32I like this a lot.
06:33This would be a gorgeous skirt, yes?
06:35I don't know how you'd walk in that, personally.
06:37You don't have to walk in it.
06:38It's a skirt.
06:39Do you not walk in a skirt?
06:40Why are you constantly disagreeing with me?
06:42I don't understand.
06:43And I apologize.
06:43I'm going to be taking this with me when I leave.
06:46Okay.
06:46My assistant is off camera.
06:48We didn't even see you come in with anybody.
06:50Storm, take this, please.
06:51Put this in my car and wrap it in the velvet cloak.
06:55Storm was really hiding.
06:56You know what?
06:57I think you're right.
06:58Who are you?
06:59This is camera.
07:00This is actually my favorite camera.
07:02Gets my good angles.
07:03I have a purse that looks exactly like that, yes?
07:06Do you?
07:07Yes.
07:07Well, you're saying yes and I don't know, so I'm asking do you?
07:09It is not about yes or no.
07:12It's about always.
07:14Yes?
07:14Yes.
07:15Yes.
07:15Always.
07:17I feel a sadness in you, like an otherworldly deep sadness.
07:21Do people make fun of the way that you dress?
07:23I don't think so.
07:24I've been sad since, uh, well, the infant incident.
07:29But, you know, it's every once in a while I sort of feel as though you have to pretend
07:33that the sadness is not there, yes?
07:36Yes.
07:36And I sort of feel that, you know, within...
07:40Oh, God.
07:42The art, it just...
07:43Please!
07:43Okay.
07:47Oh, geez.
07:48Okay.
07:48Oh.
07:49Maybe Storm could help.
07:50Okay, so...
07:51Storm.
07:51And then we go.
07:52Okay.
07:52And then Storm offset, because...
07:54Storm, storm, storm, storm, storm, storm, storm, storm.
07:58I'd like to paint your eyes.
07:59Me?
08:00Yes, right now.
08:01Can we find some paint, please?
08:02We find some paint?
08:03I have to paint Vic's eyes right now.
08:04Okay, yes.
08:04We have to move this out of the way.
08:06Maybe this can go in the exhibit.
08:07Right now.
08:07We have to move everything right now.
08:09Okay.
08:09Please?
08:09We'll move it.
08:10I need you to sit right here with me right now.
08:12Yep.
08:12Okay.
08:12Oh, God!
08:13What does this mean?
08:14The flag has fallen and the water is evaporating.
08:17Yes.
08:18What does this mean?
08:18Yes, yes.
08:19A lack of resources.
08:21For just a moment, please.
08:22Maybe this piece of art that is now broken apart is sort of telling us that this country
08:28is not great again.
08:34Vic, if you please, I want you to hold these flags.
08:37And to yourself out loud, please tell me what you love about this country.
08:41Okay.
08:42Um, I love...
08:45Okay.
08:46I love sort of that I get to do this show in this country.
08:50Yes.
08:50I did try and do this show when I was in Hungary and that...
08:53If you're hungry, then get some food.
08:55Okay.
08:55No, the country, though.
08:56I've taken improv comedy once or twice in my life.
08:59Did you?
09:00So that was a joke that I tried, yes.
09:02Okay.
09:02I did try and do stand-up one time at a storytelling show, but my jokes were mostly sort of
09:07like
09:07headlines.
09:08Vic, can I say something?
09:08You're very long-winded.
09:12Oh, okay.
09:13Oh, no.
09:14So I see what this is.
09:15No, so this is sort of...
09:16I got this commissioned, actually, by an artist that maybe you know.
09:19He does sort of...
09:20Can you hold this for me, please?
09:21Birds and portrait...
09:22Well, so plastic on these, Storm!
09:24So Storm isn't cleared to be on the set.
09:27So hold it.
09:28Okay.
09:28Do as I say.
09:30Do as I say.
09:31I think something I'm really working on as a person is, you know, I'm listening to feedback.
09:35You have not been listening.
09:37Okay.
09:38Well, then that must not be true.
09:39Oh, wow.
09:40Look at this.
09:41Oh, God.
09:42Okay.
09:42I'm feeling this deep, deep sadness within, yes?
09:45That is tears for not listening, yes?
09:48So first I was a little excited that we were getting an original, and now it's sort of a...
09:51What you want, just not the way you wanted it.
09:56When was the last time you felt utter despair?
09:59Right now.
10:00Why?
10:00I think, you know, like, I was really excited to have you on and interview you about art,
10:03and, you know, I just, I think your work meant so much to me.
10:06Again, this long-winded, I just don't understand, I ask a question, then I get this sort of soliloquy
10:11of information, it's grating.
10:13Are you a Republican?
10:15I don't speak politics.
10:17Oh, right.
10:18Okay.
10:18You know, and we'll sort of, we'll put those sort of over there.
10:21Let me tell you something about art.
10:22It is not always what for, it is what you are on the inside, but that doesn't matter.
10:29It's what's on the outside, yes?
10:31Oh my god, I get it.
10:32It's us.
10:33I'm not done.
10:34Okay.
10:34It is what you are on the outside, but it's all on the inside as well.
10:39It's the two of us sort of building something together, something greater than ourselves.
10:43I sort of find...
10:45Um, it's USA.
10:47Okay.
10:48When I think about what I think is great, I think about how much I love this nation.
10:55Right.
10:55And how much it has given me.
10:58I wanted to do fireworks.
11:00I think we sort of get the idea here.
11:01Storm, I need a tissue.
11:02So we'll just sort of do this.
11:04Storm, can you kiss it, please?
11:06Thank you, Storm.
11:08Okay.
11:08We'll go up then.
11:10Look at this.
11:11Oh man.
11:12Okay.
11:12And there we go.
11:14Okay.
11:14Okay.
11:15And so sort of...
11:15Vic, it's a pull.
11:16You just have to pull me up, yes?
11:18So I'm sort of...
11:19And there we go.
11:20Look at that.
11:21Hello?
11:22Hello?
11:22Ah!
11:25This is our PA.
11:26Oh dear god.
11:27And we do have to...
11:28And we say thank you.
11:29Thank you for gathering our art.
11:31I was not prepared for this.
11:32I apologize.
11:34And I will learn better.
11:34And I will do better.
11:36Okay.
11:36Well, I'm noticing this is kind of drying.
11:39And...
11:40And look at that.
11:41Vic, it's a pull.
11:42You just have to pull me.
11:43And it's a pull.
11:43And there we are.
11:44Thank you so much.
11:44Look at that.
11:45Fantastic.
11:46It's maybe...
11:46Okay.
11:47Oh no.
11:48Okay.
11:49That can't be hurting.
11:51It's not really attached to your head.
11:52It's sort of a spike.
11:53Is this coming from your head?
11:54Why would you ask someone a question like that?
11:56What do you mean?
11:57It looks like a hat.
11:57Do I ask you about your appearance?
11:59You did sort of ask her about my suit.
12:01No.
12:01Ten minutes ago.
12:02That's lies.
12:03That's fake news.
12:04Hey, let's focus.
12:05You're here to talk about your art show.
12:07And I want to support you in that mission.
12:08I have a performance that I would like to do.
12:11Yes?
12:11Yes.
12:12Please.
12:12We would love to see a performance, I think.
12:14Can I have a light change?
12:15Yes?
12:16I'm sure.
12:16Okay.
12:17So we'll sort of...
12:19Yes?
12:20Okay.
12:20Spooky.
12:23Yes?
12:29Oh, say can you see...
12:36By the dawn's early light.
12:43What so proudly we hailed at the twilight's last gleaming?
12:54Whose broad stripes and bright stars through the perilous lights?
13:07Where the ramparts we watched were so gallantly streaming?
13:19And the rocket's wrangling?
13:47Oh, say does that star-spangled?
13:55I'm not done.
13:55than I yet waive o'er the land of the free, o'er the home of the...
14:24Rave.
14:29Oh, okay. Okay. I get it. You're sort of like, oh, I'm like a Republican. It's the art.
14:36No.
14:36You're playing like this character that we're all like, oh my God, who did she vote for?
14:40And we're like so scared for a second.
14:41I voted for Donald J. Trump.
14:47I voted for Donald J. Trump. I don't know if you know this, but the J stands for Jessica.
14:53And so I just sort of feel like I just wanted to share that.
14:58Oh. So that's real.
15:00Yes.
15:00Okay.
15:00What's the issue?
15:02I think that you voted for a bad person.
15:04His middle name is Jessica. How bad can he be?
15:07I don't think that's his middle name.
15:08It's fine. I'm happy with the candidate I voted for.
15:11You know what?
15:11Can't we all just get along? I don't understand the issue.
15:14Oh, we get along over to the art pieces here.
15:15So let's maybe go take a look at this.
15:17What is the problem?
15:18We heard maybe you'd be interested in live ideating an art piece here for us.
15:22Oh, wow. This is a treasure trove.
15:24So what do you look for when you're looking to create an art piece?
15:26I'm looking for color variation.
15:30This represents a bill for fracking.
15:34Because it's twisted.
15:35Because it's needed.
15:36We have sound here.
15:43The sound of the south.
15:50Yes.
15:51I think the south maybe has enough sound.
15:52If we could just storm!
15:54And so storm is sort of right here.
15:56Please take this and put it in buttermilk and have it solidified.
16:00So storm is making a lot of the art.
16:02Hello?
16:03Hello?
16:04Hello?
16:04Hello?
16:05Yes?
16:05Hello?
16:06Yes?
16:06Oh, I love this.
16:08Okay. Me too.
16:09That's something we can agree on.
16:11You are going to abide by the law.
16:14There is a citywide curfew.
16:16You are going to abide by the law.
16:19There is a citywide curfew.
16:22Stop attacking the cops.
16:24They are here to protect you.
16:26And then my turn with the art and I sort of say, oh, okay.
16:29Okay, this actually does feel great, actually.
16:32I was going to say, you know, I don't know that that's true.
16:33And also I don't think that cops attacking civilians is really an issue.
16:36Oh, so we found another one.
16:38There is a nationwide curfew.
16:41Stop attacking the cops.
16:42Well, I don't think anybody's attacking.
16:44Stop attacking the cops.
16:44Nobody's attacking the police.
16:46Okay, I don't think that's really an issue.
16:48Stop attacking the cops.
17:04What do you mean the lobbyists need money?
17:05I think they're giving money.
17:07They don't need money.
17:07They're so rich.
17:08I feel like the lobbyists need money.
17:09Why is that an issue?
17:11And I think there should be more guns.
17:14No, no, no.
17:16Yes?
17:16There shouldn't be more guns.
17:17There are plenty of guns.
17:18There needs to be less guns, actually.
17:20And guess what?
17:20I'm sorry.
17:21I'm sorry to say it.
17:22I love your art and I think you're a bad person.
17:24And I don't think we can separate art from the artist.
17:27Frank, I have a question for you.
17:29Have you ever been to the island of Sweden?
17:31No, no, I haven't.
17:33I have a beautiful house there.
17:35Of course you do.
17:36With several bedrooms.
17:37Yeah.
17:37A 24-7 live-in chef.
17:39A live-in masseuse.
17:41Of course.
17:41And live performances every night by Maroon 5.
17:44Maroon 5?
17:45Would you like to be a guest in my home?
17:48We would have a fantastic time.
17:50I have an infinity pool.
17:51In fact, I have four.
17:55No.
17:56No.
17:57I have a private jet outside.
17:59Storm is fueling it right now.
18:00And we have unlimited flan.
18:02I spoke to a producer earlier who I paid $10,000 to tell me how much you love flan.
18:08Flan.
18:09Would you like to hold this flag for me?
18:10Yes?
18:11Just my fingers are tired.
18:13Yes?
18:14You know what?
18:15Honestly, I think I could probably do more good by coming with you and having a conversation.
18:19Oh, yes.
18:19Because that's how you change people.
18:21We can chat.
18:22Conversations with people.
18:23Yes.
18:23Yes.
18:24Yes.
18:24I just want to say Vic Michaelis is coming to my house and being a guest in my home.
18:30And they do not care who I voted for.
18:32So we're going to do that.
18:34Vic Michaelis endorses my beliefs.
18:34I'm Vic Michaelis reminding you to be true to yourself.
18:37Unless you'd rather be somebody else.
18:39Good night.
18:39And I didn't say that.
18:39I have to say, Vic Michaelis does endorse my beliefs.
18:43I just think we should stay off of social media.
18:45Maybe.
18:45And we sort of maybe just...
18:46I've been live streaming this entire time.
18:48Storm has been in the corner.
18:49I wanted to say, the week that you come, my dear friend Newt Gingrich is going to be there.
18:54He is a riot.
18:57He's so hilarious.
18:58Does he do improv too?
18:59Yes, he does improv funnily enough.
19:01And I feel like you will have so much to discuss, Vic.
19:04Why?
19:32Okay.
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