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  • 1 week ago
Dave & Chuck the Freak talk about an email from a listener who said he's named his coffee maker after Jason. It shoots out two streams of coffee, like Jason, so he now calls it Jason the Brew.

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Fun
Transcript
00:00What are you doing?
00:01Oh, I'm picking up notes of cherry, berry, maybe tropical fruit.
00:08Chuck, it's fruity rainbow from 5-Hour Energy.
00:11Oh, yes, refined.
00:305-Hour Energy text line is 46969.
00:34And if you want to email us, like this listener just did, you can email at DaveAndChuckTheFreak.com.
00:40Email at DaveAndChuckTheFreak.com.
00:42This guy, he's renamed his coffee maker after Jason.
00:47Oh, how nice.
00:48Oh, wow.
00:48What do you mean?
00:50Wow.
00:50What an honor.
00:51He now calls it Jason the Brew, because like you, it has two streams.
00:56Oh, look at that.
00:59Ah, that's incredible.
01:03Ah, that's perfect.
01:06I mean, that is.
01:07If you ever needed a visual, you have it.
01:11Oh, that got my funny bone, let me tell you.
01:14Got it.
01:14My nozzle was that big.
01:16Oh, my God.
01:17I'd be in porn today.
01:18Yep, incredible stuff.
01:21How nice of him to think of you.
01:23That's the first thing he thought of.
01:24That is crazy.
01:25He's making his coffee.
01:26That looks like Jason's penis stream.
01:28Yeah.
01:29It takes a big bump of it.
01:30Yeah, it is wild.
01:31And then drinks it down.
01:32And then he drinks it, yeah.
01:32And then he drinks that hot.
01:34That was my urine taste.
01:35Oh, God.
01:36Wow.
01:37Smells delicious.
01:38I could post that if you want.
01:39Yeah, absolutely.
01:40All right, cool.
01:41Yes, he calls it Jason the Brew.
01:43You should Photoshop me on top of it.
01:45No, I don't know if we need that.
01:46It's coming right out of the spigot.
01:47Yeah.
01:47He said, I've named my coffee maker Jason the Brew hashtag double stream.
01:51That's awesome.
01:52That's amazing.
01:53Yeah, people are thinking of you and your urinary problems.
01:56I love it that I've ruined people's mornings.
01:58Oh, man.
01:59You know what?
02:00You know, we talked about your dong.
02:01And again, not to bring it up again, but my buddy who listens a lot says it's the one
02:06time in the history of our show, he had to turn it off because he couldn't handle the
02:10dick stuff.
02:10The thought of someone penetrating your pee hole.
02:12Oh.
02:13Just got it like he just.
02:15It hit him right.
02:16Couldn't hit him right in the pee hole.
02:17Yeah.
02:17Well, I'm doing exactly what I'm supposed to then.
02:20Yep.
02:20Destroying the ratings.
02:22I've been doing that from the beginning.
02:23They don't matter, Dave.
02:24You're right.
02:26It don't matter.
02:27They don't matter.
02:28Jason the Brew.
02:29I like it.
02:29How many clicks did he get?
02:31Exactly.
02:31Digital first.
02:33Yeah.
02:33Yeah.
02:34You're streamed on digital and then.
02:37Wait till you see what I do with this.
02:39You want me to put my stream out on digital?
02:40That's what we call it.
02:41The Dave and Chuck double stream.
02:43What?
02:43Why?
02:44Can I tell you this right now?
02:46Yeah.
02:47What?
02:48Chuck.
02:49It would be.
02:50It is not happening.
02:52It is not happening.
02:53Okay.
02:55But if he put his stream out and like the whole, the whole all hell breaking loose.
03:02All hell breaking loose.
03:03Wow.
03:03I mean, it would break the internet.
03:05I can't record it.
03:07No, we don't want you to.
03:08And I need help.
03:08I don't want you to.
03:09I need someone to get it from the side.
03:11Al.
03:12I'm sorry?
03:13You want to get it from the top, but you also need to get it from the side.
03:16You got to set up a couple of tripods.
03:17I need a couple of guys in there.
03:18Yeah.
03:18I need like a whole rig.
03:20I need that big.
03:21Well.
03:21Halo light or whatever.
03:23Yeah.
03:23Yeah.
03:23Wow.
03:23Yeah.
03:24Al's got it.
03:24I'll post.
03:25I'm not there.
03:26I'm not filming it.
03:27Yeah.
03:28Come on, man.
03:29Yep.
03:30No, you will get splashbacks.
03:31So I would stand.
03:32I would watch out.
03:34It's like one of those like SWAT team shields.
03:37Yes.
03:38There needs to be two guys on either side of them dressed like the Gordon's fishermen.
03:42And then that's fine.
03:43And then also like waterproof cameras.
03:46Oh, I hate that.
03:47I hate my life.
03:48Oh, no.
03:48Come on.
03:49You're working to get it fixed.
03:51You double stream.
03:51There you are.
03:53If it was only that normal, I think I would just say, is it worth documenting in life?
04:02Like I've realized this.
04:04I've started.
04:05I know this sounds really weird, but I've started taking pictures at times when most people
04:10would never take them.
04:11Like what?
04:12Like what?
04:13Sad moments.
04:15You know, like because your life is not just happy.
04:22Happy moments.
04:23It's also.
04:23Do you want to remember the bad moments?
04:26I do.
04:27Why?
04:27Because I can't picture them.
04:29So I.
04:30I.
04:31But don't you want to forget them?
04:32I don't know if I do.
04:33I think because you remember the bad and that makes the good even sweeter.
04:37I think that's just my life.
04:39That's beautiful.
04:39You know, you learn something from the bad.
04:41You know, I just I think that there's something something to it.
04:45But I mean, you know, even if it's something as silly as like, oh, man, your kid lost that
04:52big game and it's like everyone's upset.
04:55OK, take some.
04:55Take some photos.
04:57Yeah.
04:57You know, like and I'm just saying for you.
05:02Documenting that as a wild.
05:06Yes, that is.
05:07That is the cameraman.
05:08We got to contact that.
05:09Everyone in the bathroom with Jason.
05:13It's like the maid of the mist or whatever.
05:15I mean, it's not too different than like a whale shooting water out of his blowhole.
05:21OK, it's just like.
05:22Oh, it's just so it's not too distinct streams.
05:25It's just.
05:26You never know.
05:27Again, it's different every time.
05:29Yeah, it is a wild roll of the dice.
05:31Yeah.
05:31When I go to urinate as wild.
05:33Never know.
05:34It's what I'm just saying for your own sake, like it'd be interesting to document these
05:38are the bad times and then like get it all fixed.
05:40And it's like there it is.
05:42Again, I guess I don't know, man.
05:44I don't take pictures of sad.
05:46No, I don't video crying just last night.
05:49You were crying on video.
05:51Yeah, I did.
05:51I danced with my wife.
05:53You did.
05:54I did.
05:54I did.
05:55I put on Unchained Melody and put my hand out for her and she was like, oh my God.
06:01And then we dance.
06:01But she was like, you're up to something.
06:03What's this all about?
06:04Why are you dancing with me?
06:06But then Scott knows that Butterfly Kisses makes me cry and he's been begging me to play
06:11it.
06:11So I was dancing with Kelly and him and we put it on and I'm crying like a baby.
06:15And Jessie turned the camera and I'm on video crying.
06:19See, that's good.
06:20That's great.
06:21Crying.
06:22But that's a sweet moment really.
06:23That's a sweet moment really.
06:24That's a sweet moment.
06:25That's a happy moment.
06:26That's a happy moment.
06:26I thought you were a real puss.
06:28Yeah.
06:28I'm like, don't you hear the lyrics?
06:30That's nice that she danced with you.
06:32Yeah.
06:32That was the challenge.
06:34That was the challenge.
06:35You did it.
06:35Find yourself a lady who will dance with you if you put your hand out.
06:38She was.
06:38And I asked guys to do that challenge, including Jason, and you did it and it worked.
06:42So good.
06:42That's a good sign.
06:43Unchained Melody, I was like, this will get her.
06:46This will get her.
06:46Your problem was you got the kids involved and then you started crying.
06:50You blew all that good sexual energy you built up.
06:54I know.
06:55Yeah.
06:56You should have stopped there.
06:57You got that pill going.
06:58Yeah, pop the pill in.
06:59You got the pill.
07:00You got the pill.
07:00You got the pill.
07:01You got your baby.
07:02You got your baby.
07:02You got your baby ready.
07:03And then I had Scott cut in, you know.
07:06I was like, buddy, you got to say, can I cut in please?
07:08And it just melted her heart.
07:10It was great.
07:11And then I was like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
07:13That's a great family.
07:15Oh, man.
07:16Oh, man.
07:17So nice.
07:17She's already walking down the aisle.
07:18Oh, no.
07:21That's what it's all about.
07:22It's so sad.
07:23I know.
07:23It's really, it goes by so quick.
07:25It's so sad.
07:26That song is so sad.
07:27Someone said Chuck's photography store is going to be like a goth teen chick, all black
07:31and white photos with people crying and sad music.
07:33She's like, check these out.
07:34Check this out.
07:35How sad is that?
07:36I'm like, these are great.
07:38These are fantastic.
07:39I don't recommend taking pictures of sadness.
07:41No.
07:41I think that people don't do it enough.
07:43That is just my thought.
07:44I think we've got enough sadness.
07:45That's right.
07:46We're trying to get away from that.
07:47Yes.
07:48Happy moments.
07:49Happy times.
07:49I can understand it.
07:50When I want to look back, I don't want to doom scroll my own photos.
07:52I think it's your life, man.
07:54I get it.
07:55It makes sense.
07:56Well, you two are dark sided.
07:57So yes.
07:58Yeah.
07:58That's why.
07:59You have to have both sides of the coin.
08:01I really believe.
08:03Horrible moments in my life will never leave me.
08:05I don't need to keep looking back at them.
08:07Nope.
08:08Enough is enough.
08:09The good and the bad both just disappear.
08:12Okay.
08:13All right.
08:14Coming up.
08:16Jesus.
08:16Jesus.
08:17It just started with Jason's piss stream and then we got real sad.
08:20Mm-hmm.
08:22No.
08:23No.
08:23No.
08:24No.
08:24No.
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