00:05Face it, donkey, we're lost.
00:06No, I'm not.
00:07We can't be lost.
00:08We follow the king's instructions exactly.
00:10What did he say?
00:10Head to the deepest darkest part of the woods.
00:12Yes.
00:13Pass the sinister trees with those scary-looking friends.
00:15Yes.
00:15Yeah, and there's that bush that's shaped like Shirley Mac.
00:17Yeah.
00:18Launched that bush three times already.
00:20Hey, you would have wanted to send you,
00:21didn't want to stop and get directions.
00:22Oh, great.
00:24My one chance to fix things up with Fiona's dad,
00:27and I end up lost in the woods with you.
00:29All right, you don't have to get all healthy with me.
00:31I'm only trying to help you.
00:31I know.
00:32I know.
00:35I'm sorry, all right?
00:37Hey, don't worry about it.
00:39I just really need to make things work with this guy.
00:42Yeah, sure.
00:43Now let's go bond with that.
00:44Yeah.
00:52Well, we're welcome here.
00:54I thought it was kind of a tender moment back then.
00:56But you're currently?
00:57What are you talking about?
00:58I ain't currently.
00:59Oh, sure.
01:00What's next?
01:01A hug?
01:01Hey, shrimp.
01:02Donkeys don't turn.
01:03Got me there.
01:04Come on.
01:05Ha-ha!
01:06Fear me.
01:07If you dare.
01:08Hey, look.
01:09A little cat.
01:10Look out, shrimp.
01:11I got a piece.
01:11It's a cat, donkey.
01:13Come here, little kitty.
01:14Kitty, kitty, kitty.
01:15Come on.
01:16Why are you here?
01:17Yeah.
01:18Come here, little kitty.
01:21Yeah.
01:23Oh, come on.
01:25Oh, get it off.
01:26Oh, get it off.
01:28Oh, come on.
01:29Oh, come on.
01:31Oh, no.
01:32Ah!
01:33Oh, ho, ho, ho.
01:34Get it off.
01:35Hold still.
01:35Crash.
01:36Hold still.
01:36Oh, right.
01:38The breath baskets.
01:40No.
01:41You got them.
01:45Now, ye ogre, ready for mercy, bro.
01:51Puss.
01:53I'll kill that cat.
02:15Oh, that is nasty.
02:18What do you reckon we should do with him?
02:20I say we take the sword and neuter him right here.
02:22Give him the bomb.
02:23Oh, my God.
02:25Please, I implore you.
02:26It was nothing personal, senor.
02:28I was doing the only for my family.
02:29My mother, she's sick of my family.
02:32This other garbage.
02:33The king offered me much.
02:35Can I have a little brother?
02:36Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
02:38Fiona's father paid you to do this?
02:40A rich king?
02:41Si.
02:46Well, so much for dad's royal blessing.
02:49Aw, come on, Shrek.
02:50Don't feel bad.
02:51Almost everybody admits she wants to kill you.
02:53Gee, thanks.
02:57Maybe Fiona would have been better off if I were some sort of prince charming.
03:01Gee, that's what the king said.
03:04Oh, sorry.
03:06I thought the question was the heck to them.
03:09Shrek.
03:09Fiona knows you'll do anything for her.
03:11Well, it's not like I wouldn't change if I could.
03:15I just...
03:16I just wish I could make her happy.
03:19Oh, the boy.
03:22Happiness.
03:24A teardrop away.
03:27Donkey.
03:28Think of the saddest thing that's ever happened to you.
03:30Oh, man.
03:31Where do I be?
03:32Yeah.
03:33Well, first it was the time that old farmer tried to sell me for some magic beans.
03:36I ain't never got over that.
03:37Then this fool went off and had a party, and he had all the guests trying to pin a tail
03:40on me.
03:41Then they all got drunk and started beating me with a stick going,
03:43Piñata, piñata.
03:44What is a piñata anyway?
03:46No, donkey.
03:47I need you to cry.
03:48Yeah, well, don't go projecting on me.
03:50I know you're feeling bad, but you gotta let your hold me.
03:52Ah!
03:55I'm really not.
03:56Take a look at the second.
04:04What?
04:05Is it on?
04:05Is it on?
04:07This is fairy godmother.
04:09I'm either away from my desk or with a client.
04:11But if you come by the office, we'll be glad to make you a personal appointment.
04:16Have a happy ever after.
04:21Now, are you up for a little quest, donkey?
04:24All right, that's more likely.
04:25Shrek and donkey on another whirlwind adventure.
04:28Ain't no stability now.
04:30Well, we're on the floor.
04:31Stop, fucker.
04:32I haven't missed you.
04:34Join the club.
04:34We've got jackets.
04:35On my own.
04:36I am obliged to accompany you until you have saved your life, and you have spared me mine.
04:40I'm sorry, the position of annoying talking animals has already been taken.
04:44Let's go, Shrek!
04:45Yeah.
04:46Shrek?
04:47Shrek, what are you doing?
04:49It's Bob's.
04:56Shrek!
04:56Oh, come on, donkey.
04:58Look at him.
04:59There's wee little boots.
05:01You know, how many cats can wear boots?
05:03Honestly.
05:04Oh, let's keep up.
05:05So what?
05:07I can't.
05:10Oh, listen, he's burning.
05:11Oh, so now it's keep up.
05:13Oh, come on, donkey.
05:14Lighten up.
05:15Lighten up?
05:15Oh, I should lighten up.
05:16Look who's telling who to lighten up.
