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Jupiter Moon is a science fiction soap opera television series first broadcast by British Satellite Broadcasting's Galaxy channel in 1990. 150 episodes were commissioned and made, but only the first 108 were broadcast before the closure of BSB. Episodes 109–150 were first shown in the UK on the Sci Fi Channel in 1996.

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Transcript
00:01Professor, oh good.
00:03Yes, what is it? I'm working flat out.
00:05It's Victoria.
00:06Well?
00:07She's planning to go straight to Ceres and start work on Island Five.
00:10Jean-Francois has found her a job in the local library.
00:13Have you told her she can have a teaching post at Columbus?
00:16$400 a week, Professor, and she'll be with the man she loves.
00:19We need her on the Ilya.
00:21I don't think we stand a chance.
00:30We need her on the Ilya.
00:58Stay tuned for a while.
01:02What is it with her, anyway? I mean, do you think she's attractive?
01:06Yeah, she can be quite attractive. Yeah, she's got a nice smile.
01:09Anyway, what's being attractive got to do with getting a degree, Maladie?
01:13Don't be naive, Sarah.
01:15Yes, Sarah, don't be naive.
01:17What? It's obvious. What is?
01:20Brennan, the pencil's half. Oh, come off it.
01:23I don't know about that, Mel. He does.
01:25All this I'll be a bother to you now you haven't got one.
01:28When did he ever try being nice to me? I've got no father and no mother.
01:31Yeah, all right, Melody.
01:32He never took me under his wing to say,
01:34be my daughter as we conquer deepest space.
01:37No, because you'd have probably screamed your head off.
01:39Victoria does work hard, though, Mel.
01:41Yeah, well, I work hard. What?
01:44I've passed all my modules. I've only got six outstanding credits.
01:47If anyone wants to do a bit of extra help, it ought to be me, the condition I need.
01:51Oh, yeah.
01:53Hi. Hi.
01:55Oh, what's the matter?
01:56Oh, not so much for that as well.
02:00Melody thinks it's unfair that Victoria's been given her degree.
02:02Well, she does work hard. Very hard. She's always been a worker.
02:07It's surprising what you can achieve by working hard,
02:09and I know Professor Brennan takes notice of that sort of thing.
02:12Don't you just love yoghurt?
02:13Mmm. I think it tastes wonderful this morning, don't you?
02:19I still can't believe it.
02:20Is Jean-François pleased?
02:21Yeah, he's thrilled.
02:23What job is it exactly?
02:24I don't know, really. Something in the library?
02:26He says the library there is fantastic.
02:28Apparently I won't be able to believe the facilities after the Ilya.
02:31Yes, you know, I've heard about the American facilities.
02:33Yeah, fresh bread.
02:34They've even got fresh bread.
02:36Their dome is so big that they can grow their own wheat.
02:39And what work will you be doing?
02:40I don't know yet.
02:41Will you be doing any original research?
02:43Oh, no. Not in the library.
02:45But I'll apply for a job in research as soon as there's a vacancy.
02:48Honestly, Bex, I don't care if I'm sorting out the laundry to begin with.
02:57Hi.
02:58Look.
02:59Hi.
03:00Hey!
03:00Wake up!
03:01You lazy thing. It's time to work.
03:03Get off.
03:04Work, work, work. I'll be nice to the professor.
03:06And maybe you'll get your degree in two years instead of four.
03:09Well, he can hardly do that because he's already been here for five years, haven't you, Byron?
03:13Man and boy, Sarah. Man and boy.
03:15What?
03:16Call from Valhalla for all students taking stellar evolution.
03:21Professor Brelin apologises, but he is unable to take any seminars today.
03:26Again?
03:26Please continue working.
03:28You did this to us yesterday, you know.
03:29We know you did.
03:31I don't know why we bother. What's the point in being here?
03:33It doesn't particularly bother me. It scares me off to death anyway.
03:37The man's a raving egomaniac. He thinks he's running this ship.
03:41He is running the ship.
03:43Yeah, but should he be?
03:45Where's our principal?
03:46Probably floating around the solar system in a body bag.
03:49Tim!
03:50Look, I can't even get to speak to him and I'm the chair of the students' union.
03:54Yes, well, none of us can because he's not here, is he?
03:56Oh, Byron thinks he's here but hiding in the heating system.
03:59Oh, shut up, Byron.
04:00I'm going to go find somewhere quiet to work.
04:02I'll come with you. We can work in my cabin.
04:05Hey, look. This is our future we're talking about here.
04:09Yes, Byron.
04:13Hello.
04:14Morning.
04:15I don't think I can stand much more of this.
04:17It's Brellin running the college.
04:19Ah.
04:20You know, he's not interested in students, so why on earth does he want to be principal?
04:23Besides, he hasn't the stature.
04:25Hmm.
04:26You know, he says Berlin have cut the post.
04:27But they can only have done that if they knew he'd step in and take over.
04:30And you don't like working for him?
04:31I hate it.
04:32He's got me sorting out all the things he should be sorting out.
04:35He's not interested in students.
04:37Well, except Victoria.
04:39Have you heard about her degree?
04:40Er, yes.
04:41Charles did mention it.
04:42It's deserved.
04:43Good move.
04:44We need another post-grad lecturer.
04:46Hmm.
04:46Except she's got no intention of staying here and lecturing.
04:49She's planning to go off to series and scrub floors.
04:52Victoria?
04:53Yeah, I know.
04:53Who'd have thought it?
04:54But why, for God's sake?
04:57Well, her fiancé's there and she's lonely here.
04:59Island Five.
05:00They're not doing any decent biochemistry research work on Island Five.
05:03It's a complete waste of her brain.
05:05Well, you tell her.
05:06Well, what about a PhD and a research work with Charles?
05:08A PhD?
05:08I don't know anything about a PhD.
05:11Petra, get me Charles Brel in deedless control.
05:15Oh, look at this.
05:17Couldn't you just see her in this?
05:19She's sweet.
05:20Yeah.
05:22Daniel.
05:23Daniel, don't mess those up.
05:25You just put them away.
05:27And this.
05:28Look at this.
05:29I've never had anything like this.
05:31What's the matter?
05:32Nothing.
05:34Well, why can't I look at you?
05:36You make me cry.
05:38Why?
05:41Daniel, what are you doing?
05:44How did I ever think I'd be able to cope with a baby stuck in this place,
05:48millions of miles away from Earth?
05:50Melody, stop thinking you're on your own.
05:52Why do you keep behaving as if you're on your own?
05:58Melody?
06:03Victoria's papers must have been really good.
06:05Hey.
06:07What?
06:08Oh, yeah, I suppose so.
06:10Well, as good as mine.
06:11What do you think?
06:13What about Anna?
06:14Well, she did really good papers, but were they the best papers ever?
06:17I don't know.
06:18Well, you shut up.
06:19I'm trying to get this done.
06:20I don't think they're as good as my papers on super strength, Jimmy.
06:23Anna!
06:23Well, nobody said they were, anyway.
06:28Hi.
06:29Look, I don't mean to be any bother, but just a quick yes-no question.
06:32What do you think of shuttle fares?
06:33Yes-no.
06:34Give the lady a coconut!
06:37Hmm.
06:37No, seriously.
06:38Your opinion obviously holds a lot of weight with a mad professor.
06:40What do you think?
06:42I don't really think about it.
06:43I don't use the shuttle very often.
06:45Well, let's put it another way, then.
06:48Can you afford to use the shuttles?
06:49No.
06:50Now we're getting somewhere.
06:51Look, I don't want to go to Callisto.
06:53I don't want to use the shuttle.
06:55I'm really...
06:56I'm not interested.
06:57Anyway, I'm going to series soon.
07:01Thanks a lot.
07:06Yes?
07:08Could we meet sometime today, Victoria?
07:10Say, half an hour?
07:11Yes.
07:12Is it about EVA 3?
07:13Not exactly.
07:15I've been thinking.
07:17I've had a really good time here as an undergrad.
07:20Well, not at first, but lately.
07:23You know me and theoretical physics.
07:25I may not be very good at all the other subjects,
07:28but after all, the board can take a brilliant paper
07:31like my super-string theory
07:32and give you a degree just on the strength of that
07:35if they want to, can't they?
07:36Can they?
07:37No, not you, Timmy.
07:38You're too young.
07:39So, look at Mozart.
07:39Look at Nota.
07:40My professor on Island 5 said I had the most profound grasp
07:43of computer skills he'd ever encountered.
07:45His very words.
07:46Yeah, and then he sent me back here.
07:48Yeah, but I wanted to come back.
07:49But age is important, Timmy.
07:51You can't just be one-sided.
07:52I mean, you have to have had a proper student experience,
07:55like being in the play.
07:57Coffee, anyone?
07:59Yeah.
07:59Okay.
08:01She thinks they're gonna give her a degree.
08:03She can't.
08:04She does.
08:04She's correct.
08:05I know.
08:07The trouble with Melody is she's all right for ages
08:10and then she suddenly goes into these states.
08:11It's not entirely surprising or unusual.
08:14No, she seems to forget about it for days on end.
08:16And if you were pregnant for ten minutes.
08:18No, she put it out of her mind.
08:20And then suddenly, when these baby clothes arrived,
08:22it hit her.
08:23This is really gonna happen.
08:24Something's gonna be put in these clothes soon.
08:27Open.
08:29What do you want now?
08:31It's nice.
08:32I haven't said anything yet.
08:33I'm sorry, Byron, but you seem to think I'm here
08:35just for you to have a go at.
08:36I wasn't even looking for you,
08:37but since you're here, I've got a question.
08:39Who's in charge?
08:40I'll let you know, now if you'll excuse me.
08:43No, look, I'm beginning to lose a little patience.
08:45Do you realize that I'm the chair of the Students' Union?
08:46I should think everyone on board realizes that now, Byron.
08:49I'm mandated to speak on their behalf.
08:51Who's in charge and when can I speak to them?
08:53Is that all you think about?
08:55How can you go around being so arrogant and unfeeling?
08:58You know, the last principal we had went outside of this ship
09:00to repair it and died for you lot,
09:02and all you do is wander around moaning about shuttle fares.
09:08I only asked the question.
09:10Can't you see she's got enough to deal with?
09:12Haven't you got the brains to realize
09:14she doesn't deal with these shuttle fares?
09:15She has 50 students on this ship who are a direct responsibility.
09:20Not to mention the staff who she has to feed and organize
09:22and generally mother.
09:23Daniel, is this you, Daniel?
09:25Not to mention the first baby born open in the Jupiter system.
09:29You want to know who the new principal is?
09:31Yes.
09:32It's Professor Brelin.
09:40Oh, thanks for coming.
09:41That's all right.
09:42It's about your degree.
09:44Why?
09:45What's happened?
09:45They haven't changed their minds.
09:47Oh, Lord, no.
09:48No.
09:48Rebecca tells me you're applying for a job on Ceres.
09:52Island Five.
09:53To be with the boyfriend?
09:55My fiancée, yes.
10:00Charles wants you to reconsider.
10:02Why?
10:03He wants you to do a PhD.
10:04Security shuttle.
10:05That's to be quiet.
10:06He wants you to do a PhD.
10:09Me?
10:09Here, under his supervision, and take on a little lecturing.
10:15I can't do that.
10:17What?
10:17The lecturing or the PhD?
10:19Well, I've, um...
10:20I mean, not straight away.
10:22God, for heaven's sake, I was only an undergraduate working on basic nuclear astrophysics ten minutes
10:26ago.
10:27Charles has a very high opinion of your abilities.
10:30That's why he pushed your degree through.
10:32Yeah, but he didn't say anything about doing a doctorate.
10:35Well, he didn't think you were going to rush off to Ceres.
10:38No.
10:39Look, I'm not going forever.
10:41Just until Jean has his PhD and then I know he wants to come back here and teach.
10:45Victoria, nobody is talking about Jean.
10:48I want to be with him.
10:50Yes, and I want my very own solo wind yacht with the...
10:54with the Brazilian Mark V pleasure dome.
10:58Well, what sort of research does he want me to do?
11:01The flow of ionized gases in the presence of magnetic fields.
11:06It would be a great relief to us poor old flyers if you get to grips with that particular problem.
11:11wouldn't it?
11:11I mean, it does kill enough of us.
11:16I want to go too seriously.
11:18I really want to be with Jean.
11:20Listen.
11:21I was at Valhalla.
11:23I saw the time and trouble Charles put in to looking at your work.
11:27Despite the incredible amounts of other work he's doing.
11:30He really thinks you've got something.
11:33I'll have to think about it.
11:35Oh, yes, of course.
11:36No, Harry.
11:37He's not back on board till late tonight.
11:39It's all right.
11:40It's all right.
12:03I've had to think about it.
12:03The star of Saigon.
12:06We came out on her.
12:08Me and Timmy.
12:10Mum and Dad.
12:12From Earth.
12:15Now the poor old thing just plods backwards and forwards between here and Ceres.
12:20Don't talk about Ceres.
12:22Right.
12:23No talking about the baby, no talking about Ceres,
12:26anything else we're not supposed to be talking about.
12:27Melody, it's no good being jealous of Victoria.
12:31Jealous? What do you mean? I'm not jealous.
12:32Yes, you are. You're jealous and bitter.
12:34Well, I'm sorry, Daniel, but why does she get everything?
12:36Why is it?
12:37She gets Jean-Francois.
12:39Yeah, OK, she's welcome to Jean-Francois, but she had no right to him.
12:42She now gets given a degree so she can go and marry him on Ceres
12:45and they can live happily forever after in some luxurious American space flat.
12:49Which is all you've ever wanted.
12:51No!
12:51Yes, Melody, whilst you get left with no luxury space flat,
12:54no special brilliant degree,
12:56no romantic voyage to meet good old Jean-Francois,
12:59just the boring old Ilya and boring old Daniel Weatherby's wretched baby.
13:02Oh, Daniel!
13:02Well, you needn't show it so much, Melody.
13:04You didn't show your indifference for me and the baby so much, OK?
13:12Please.
13:16You've never been boring.
13:18Everything else, perhaps.
13:20You're never boring.
13:23I'm sorry, I just get an estate. I can't help it.
13:26I know you don't care about me, Melody.
13:28No.
13:29I know you don't care about me.
13:31I can stand that.
13:34What I can't stand is when you don't care about the baby.
13:39Whether Victoria gets her degree or not has nothing to do with us.
13:42Whether she marries Jean-Francois...
14:02Hi, Sarah, Fiona. What are you doing?
14:04Nothing.
14:05We're working.
14:07Wouldn't it be amazing if they gave me a degree because most of the string theory paper made me a
14:11post-grad?
14:14What a great necklace Bob gave you.
14:17Anna, pod off, will you?
14:20OK. Pelvic rocking. Here we go.
14:23Just leave it down here.
14:24Now, lie with your small of your back onto the floor.
14:28I haven't got small anything at the moment.
14:30Stretch the muscles in the lumbar region.
14:32Breathe normally and hold this position for a slow count of four.
14:35Open.
14:36Then release gradually to ensure your bottom firmly.
14:40What are you doing?
14:42It's my prenatal exercise handbook.
14:44Well, it's flattering that he's gone to all this trouble for me.
14:47Flattery? He's not doing it to flatter you.
14:49No, I know.
14:50But there must be other students who are ready to teach.
14:52Well, he obviously thinks you're the best.
14:54I would love to do the research.
14:56Do it, then.
14:57Oh, but I also want to be with John.
14:59Have you spoken to him about it yet?
15:01No, I'm afraid of upsetting him.
15:03Oh, for heaven's sake.
15:04You don't like him very much, do you?
15:06Of course I like him. Anyway, that's not the point.
15:08A lot of people here don't like him, and that makes staying even harder for me.
15:11Victoria, you are being offered the opportunity to do some very valuable research.
15:15You've never talked like this before.
15:16If you wanted a cosy life with a husband and a job in the local library,
15:20then what are you doing in space?
15:21You see, you don't like him.
15:22I just know it's a mistake to marry in haste.
15:25I know, because I've done it.
15:27Okay, you ready?
15:28I'm ready.
15:29Feeling pregnant?
15:30Oh, about eight and a half months, I think.
15:32Right now, lying here, little arm, leg up.
15:35Slowly you're pregnant, remember?
15:36How could I forget?
15:38Oh, now.
15:40I just have smaller your back on the floor.
15:41Uh, no.
15:42Put it there, then. Come on.
15:43Well, right now.
15:45Oh, the other one.
15:47Oh, this is so difficult.
15:48Oh, it's so tough.
15:50I think it's tough being afraid.
15:52Come on, we can't be doing this way.
15:54Oh, what are you doing here?
15:56Oh, I'm feeling Charles.
15:58I don't know whether she likes this, really.
16:01Um, Tim, what did you think of Island 5?
16:04Oh, it's great.
16:05You're going there, aren't you?
16:06Yeah.
16:06Oh, you wait till you see the student restaurant.
16:08It's fantastic.
16:09I'm not actually going for the food, Timmy.
16:12Oh, you want to be with, um, Thingy, don't you?
16:14Thingy?
16:15Thingy?
16:16Don't say you've forgotten his name already.
16:19Oh, Tim.
16:20You're not another one who hates him, are you?
16:22It's just that so few things are certain in my life.
16:25Well, in any of our lives.
16:27I've been in deep space since I was five.
16:29I know.
16:30I just thought they were settled, that's all.
16:34I'm not sorry.
16:36Professor Brelin wants me to stay here on Ilia.
16:39Why?
16:40To teach you.
16:41To teach me?
16:42Tim Shaw, child genius.
16:44And all the other little child geniuses.
16:46And to do some research.
16:48Are you going to?
16:50I don't know.
16:51I don't want to be with Thingy, you know.
16:53Is he ever going to get his PhD?
16:55Of course he is.
16:56It just seems to be taking a very long time.
16:58Oi!
16:58Ow!
17:08Ah!
17:09What?
17:09What is it?
17:10What are you doing?
17:11Something awful's happened.
17:12I told you.
17:13I told you not to try it.
17:14My back.
17:15It's agony.
17:16Getting pregnant, Byron, is simple.
17:18But being pregnant's another matter.
17:20Ah!
17:21I told you this would happen.
17:23Oh.
17:24Get it.
17:25Get it.
17:25This is some sort of joke.
17:27No, look, it might be important.
17:29Hello?
17:30Byron?
17:30Yeah, I'm here.
17:32Oh.
17:33Come and see me in Compson.
17:34I can't.
17:35You had a request in to see Professor Brelin?
17:37Yeah.
17:38You've been chasing him for days?
17:39Yeah.
17:39He's asked me to deal with it.
17:41Oh.
17:43Take me!
17:44Bye.
17:45Come on.
17:47If you can send this with the Earth packages on the next shuttle.
17:49Yes, of course.
17:50I know it'll have a long wait, but I couldn't bear it sitting around in my room.
17:54I can't think why he didn't send a message to me and get me to send it back.
17:57Oh, well, it doesn't matter.
18:01Why was he just letting you open it?
18:03Well, he probably forgot he even sent it.
18:06He's had a lot of other things on his mind lately, like getting married, for instance.
18:10I don't suppose I should be doing this.
18:12Well, don't then.
18:13Is that a stupid fault anyway?
18:15What do you mean?
18:15It's your fault.
18:16I was only trying to encourage you.
18:18I don't need encouragement.
18:20Melody, you haven't exercised your little finger since you got pregnant.
18:23That is entirely true.
18:27Pick me up!
18:28Shut up.
18:31I'm not doing it for you.
18:35She thinks she's going to get a degree.
18:38No, I don't believe it.
18:40Yes, she does.
18:40You heard of.
18:41Even Anna's not that deaf.
18:43Of course she is.
18:44She weird things.
18:45Professor Pellett is going to come up here tomorrow and award her a special degree.
18:49In front of everybody.
18:50I don't have any money in the dough.
18:51Hang on a minute, though.
18:53Anna doesn't know anything about anything.
18:55No, except string theory.
18:57Oh, right then.
18:57Yeah, string theory.
18:58No, super string theory.
18:59She keeps telling me that it's super string theory.
19:02What's the difference?
19:03Well, she thinks she's going to be given a degree because of her work on super string.
19:08Hi.
19:09Hi, Anna.
19:10Hi.
19:11Hey, have you finished your, um, still a navigation module yet?
19:14No, it's difficult with Mercedes away.
19:16I like to discuss my topics with the Tudor.
19:18Yeah.
19:19Yeah, this ship's running a bit low on Tudor.
19:21Yeah.
19:21Oh, and postgrads.
19:23We haven't got enough postgrads on this.
19:24Yeah, that's true.
19:25Um, it's a shame you're not a postgrad, Anna.
19:29You could teach me a lot about neural networking.
19:31Oh, don't be silly, Tim.
19:33Neural networking is not my subject.
19:34I think a lot of good scientists specialize in one particular field.
19:38I don't have any affinity at all with stellar navigation.
19:41No, no, nor do I.
19:42It doesn't have any room for creativity.
19:45Not like, say, super string theory.
19:49String theory?
19:51Right?
19:52Yeah.
19:58Now, Mr. Winkler, our discontent may glorious succor by the sun of York
20:03and all the clouds that load on our house in the deep bosom of the ocean.
20:10What's the matter with him?
20:12He's pulled his back.
20:15Yes?
20:16This is a formal request, Commander,
20:18for full college backing for our campaign for student shuttle fares.
20:29Why?
20:32Why what?
20:34Why should you get reduced fares?
20:37Because Carina employees get concessionary fares.
20:41And?
20:41We think we should be entitled to the same.
20:45That it, is it?
20:46That it, is it?
20:48No, no, no.
20:50Most of the students here are half a year's travel away from home.
20:53We work very hard in the hot-ass atmosphere of this ship.
20:56We think it only reasonable that for our mental well-being,
20:59we should be allowed to relax away from the ship from prototype.
21:02Yeah, yeah.
21:03Yeah.
21:05Yes, well, that all sounds very reasonable.
21:08It is reasonable.
21:09But we don't run the shuttle.
21:11It's entirely Carina Corporation's responsibility.
21:15Ah, yes.
21:15But what if we withdraw all our support for the Carina shuttle system?
21:19What if we boycott their services?
21:21What if we withdraw all our trade and customers, stay here on Ilya?
21:24What then, Commander?
21:25I imagine you'll all get some work done for once.
21:29Come on.
21:32What have you done to your back, Wilkinson?
21:35Never you mind my back.
21:37It's eased up.
21:38Oh, it isn't, is it?
21:40You need more exercise.
21:43EVA 3.
21:44You should have EVA 3 by now, Wilkinson.
21:47Tell you what, you have EVA 3, you won't need a Carina shuttle.
21:52You'll probably be able to whiz down to Space City all on your own.
21:55Thanks a lot.
21:57You can leave.
21:58Ah.
21:59Ah.
21:59Ah.
21:59Ah.
22:00Ah.
22:00Ah.
22:00Ah.
22:00Ah.
22:00Ah.
22:00Ah.
22:01Ah.
22:02Ah.
22:05Ah.
22:06Ah.
22:06Ah.
22:07Ah.
22:13Ah.
22:22At least you should try them anyway.
22:24Not likely, Daniel.
22:25Well, they're all for toning abdominal muscles.
22:27Your muscles do need toning, if you don't mind me saying it.
22:29What happened to him?
22:30Well, that's only because he wasn't doing them properly.
22:32Yeah, and I'm not pregnant.
22:34I don't.
22:36Ah.
22:38What happened?
22:39What happened?
22:40What happened, Kyra?
22:42Don't ask.
22:43No, don't ask.
22:43Oh, what a creep that man is.
22:45What a tool of the ruling clique.
22:47I told you it was hopeless.
22:49Maybe I'll call a protest meeting.
22:51A protest meeting of the entire student body.
22:54Oh, yeah.
22:55Or maybe you'll fall to sleep.
22:56Yeah, maybe that.
22:57He called.
22:58Just now he called.
22:59Who called, my little pigeon?
23:01Professor Brelin.
23:02He didn't, did he?
23:03What did he say?
23:03He came on my honor sec and said that he's coming back tonight on the shuttle and he wants
23:07to see him in his room tomorrow at 9.30.
23:09What for?
23:10I don't believe it.
23:11Why else but to tell me I've passed my degree?
23:14I'm sorry.
23:16Really?
23:17I need it.
23:20Oh, no.
23:38He's all a great day.
23:38Oh, no.
23:39He's all a great day.
23:40Oh, he's going crazy.
23:44He's his little baby.
23:44But no way.
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