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00:00Previously on Suddenly Amish.
00:02So you're cousins.
00:03Dirt cousins.
00:04I saw a lot of strange things with Emma and James.
00:07Not normal cousin activities at all now.
00:12Can they do the Amish twerk?
00:14No.
00:16James energized by Kendra's twerk.
00:19And then Emma's gaze at James watching Kendra twerk.
00:23Oh, she knew James.
00:25I should play some feelings fans when they made it.
00:28I have to be honest with you.
00:29You and Kendra would not be a good match.
00:31Okay.
00:34We highly encourage a hands-off relationship.
00:38If we were in the modern world, I would have kissed Kendra by now.
00:41You're an English guy trying to drag off her Amish ladies.
00:45We decided to leave and go to a hotel.
00:49What makes you feel entitled that you don't have to follow the rules?
00:55BJ says Kendra and Matt went off to a motel.
00:58There's only one motel close by.
01:02I need to go find them.
01:03where are we going?
01:27We could esp alimentation and go get our bodies!
01:28Let's go.
01:28I love you.
01:30What is that philosophy?
01:31What is that philosophy about birds and medicine?
01:33I know 맛있 a lot.
01:35Yield not to temptation for yielding a sin.
01:39Temptation is a real thing for everybody, including Amish.
01:44There's many ways to be tempted.
01:46Serving the flesh, serving self, it's so easy to be selfish, might as being a bad example
01:52to everybody, particularly Kendra.
01:56Kendra is somebody I want to protect.
01:59Kendra has a future here.
02:01Kendra has great potential.
02:02I don't want her to be defiled.
02:11I'm getting to a tipping point with James with all this .
02:15So we decided to leave and go to a hotel.
02:35Anybody's first thought of two individuals going to a hotel, I mean, there's probably
02:40only one thing happening in there.
02:45It was time to go confront them.
02:53We're getting ready to go to bed, and then all of a sudden we hear like banging on the
02:57door.
02:59At first, I had no idea who's banging on the door, so I thought maybe somebody was drunk
03:05and, you know, whatever.
03:07So we like gave it a minute, and it just kept going.
03:15I don't know.
03:15I don't know.
03:16I didn't know what to do.
03:17I'm freaked out.
03:18Matt is freaked out.
03:19Because like, James was banging on the door for a long time, and it was like the walls
03:22were shaking.
03:24I don't think they wanted me to know that they were there.
03:29I'm hoping they answer the door so I can talk to them.
03:32I want to see what's going on.
03:35It just kept going on for a really long time.
03:41This is like where the judgment comes in, because like, we could have been in the room
03:43reading a Bible, for all you know.
03:46And I feel like people just assume just because you're going into a hotel room that you're
03:49like going there to hook up, and it's like, we actually did not do that.
03:52Like, being caught made me feel dirty again, and like, disgusting, because I'm like, how
03:57is this going to come across?
03:59Like, I can obviously say nothing happened a hundred times, and like, people will believe
04:02what they want to believe.
04:04We'll have to confront them in the morning.
04:10I might seem like the bad guy, but I'm actually fighting for their souls.
04:32No Kendra.
04:33I'm going back.
04:38I support Kendra and Matt, you know, getting to know each other, but I feel like they should
04:42have done it the Amish way, done it correctly, instead of running off to go get a hotel.
04:47Now, it's just creating all this unnecessary drama that we don't need at the house.
04:57What's up?
05:01Not back yet.
05:07Mm-hmm.
05:10If he just communicated to talk with us, I mean, I feel like he misunderstands James.
05:14I feel like he's not trying to communicate with us as a family.
05:20We just had the discussion about the rules of what to do and what not to do on a date.
05:25So for the same day to go to the hotel, it's just breaking the rules.
05:30If y'all chose to go to a hotel, so if y'all want to go to a hotel, you
05:33have to stick up
05:34to the consequences.
05:35Alan literally said, y'all cannot touch.
05:37Yeah.
05:37They broke those.
05:38It's that simple.
05:39They broke those.
05:41I don't have time for the rigmarole, for the shenanigans.
05:44We got things to do.
05:45We still here trying to decide if we're going Amish or if we stay in English.
05:48So if they come back, if they not, I just hope that they safe.
05:51But it's done out of your hands.
05:52It's out of both of my hands.
05:53Just in God's hands.
06:16Well, Matt and Kendra going to a hotel was not the Amish way at all, so I did not agree
06:26with it, but I also didn't agree with the fact that James went after them, chased him
06:34to the hotel or whatever, and made a big scene out of it.
06:36What were you planning on doing when you went to the hotel?
06:40Well, just ask them what they're doing there.
06:44You're going to ask them what they're doing at a hotel?
06:46And maybe have a discussion about why it might not be a good thing.
06:54Maybe you should have had that conversation before they ever left.
06:58At that point, you don't have a right to go knock on their door and antagonize them.
07:03To me, that was just so wrong.
07:08I didn't know that you liked Kendra, I guess.
07:12Like, that's the only thing that makes sense.
07:16No comment.
07:26Were you guys fake the whole time?
07:28Because I was real.
07:29I love and care about you.
07:30That was real for me.
07:32Of course we do.
07:33This is not a vacation.
07:34What did you come here for?
07:36That's, it's that simple.
07:38Live it, be it, or don't.
07:41I don't know, I just, I'm just kind of flabbergasted, but...
07:46I'll just say it again, everyone here feels like family to me.
07:50And I took it very personal.
08:04Matt has a flight to catch because he's telling me that he's going home.
08:08And I'm like, okay, well, like, what do I do?
08:10Like, do I even go back?
08:11Like, I'm now terrified of homeboy.
08:15It's like, I don't know what to do.
08:25I think this idea of living Amish and joining an Amish community feels crushed right now.
08:43Why is this so awkward?
08:47I don't know. It was just time to go.
08:54Kendra and I confided in the people in the house where we were going.
08:58And I think they are the ones that told James where we were.
09:04Do I need help?
09:07Matt is giving me the cold shoulder right now.
09:10I have no idea what's going on.
09:11I wasn't even part of this whole thing.
09:14I'm just trying to follow the rules the best that I can because I care.
09:19Him not wanting to follow these rules.
09:22I mean, he looks like a child right now.
09:27It sucks I came to this.
09:31I'm just really disappointed in a lot of people.
09:35And I know Kendra's really upset.
09:37So I thought we were a lot closer with the people in the house.
09:45They are two-faced, selfish.
09:50They didn't have our backs with the hotel situation.
09:55There's nine days left.
09:57It's just ridiculous.
09:58It's like a bad temper tension.
10:01This is crazy.
10:02We didn't do to you.
10:05That is the most ridiculous, sad way of being.
10:24To be treating all of us like we did you guys dirty is so wrong.
10:29It's so wrong.
10:34I feel very betrayed by everybody in the house.
10:37I mean, I don't care to ever talk to them again, so.
10:58That Amish experience wasn't for me. I'll say that.
11:02There are good stuff that I've taken away from this.
11:04Like, I wouldn't have met Kendra if I didn't come here.
11:08I don't know what's going to happen between Kendra and I,
11:12but I'm willing to explore this connection.
11:23I am very disappointed with James.
11:27That's typically not who we are.
11:31I definitely think James did overreact.
11:36We do our best to refrain from drama.
11:41The best thing for the other English is to keep them busy working.
11:53Oh, hey there. Ready for some work?
11:55I guess I would...
11:57Good.
12:01About 5.30, 6 o'clock in the evening, we'll feed the animals.
12:05If there's daylight left, we'll either do more work in the fields or do some repairs on the property.
12:11Now we'll get the fresh feed.
12:15All right. Come and get it.
12:18Amish work ethic.
12:20I really miss my daily routines in my English world.
12:24But the Amish side is the simplicity of everyday life here.
12:29I actually don't mind doing this. It's kind of fun for me.
12:33This stuff, as simple as it is, does kind of make me feel alive.
12:38Can you tell me when we need to stop?
12:40Well, when it's empty. That's when we'll stop.
12:44In this group here, Aaron avoids conflict and he's in control of his emotions.
12:50I do sense that Aaron will be more likely to embrace the Amish lifestyle.
12:58I am very aware that Alan was judging my work ethic and my integrity.
13:04It makes me nervous.
13:06But I know as long as I'm pulling my weight knowing what I know, I've done my best.
13:12I've not made my decision if I'm sane or not.
13:15I'm still really digging deep for that.
13:19This is something that I wanted for a long time.
13:21But the hearing aids are huge for me.
13:25And if I can't have my hearing aids, it's just I don't see how it's going to work.
13:30I miss so much information and conversation.
13:33I want to know what's going on.
13:35If I can't live in the moment, that's very frustrating.
13:39He's definitely at a crossroad in his life where he has to make a decision very soon.
13:44And he's getting close.
13:47I honestly think he'd make a good Amish man.
13:50But who knows what happens.
13:55Good work.
13:58Okay.
14:00Now what?
14:06I want you guys to get your room cleaned up.
14:09All right.
14:15I might need your help hanging this bad boy up.
14:18This is very heavy.
14:43I decided for myself, like, okay, I need to leave.
14:47I want to go back in the house and give them an extra day.
14:49I need an explanation as to why I'm leaving.
14:53And I'm hoping we can end on good terms because we were all very close in the house.
15:11Hi.
15:12Hi there.
15:18I'm literally speechless.
15:21I didn't expect her to come back here.
15:24I'm thinking we just have a lot to talk about.
15:29Can we have a talk?
15:31All of us.
15:34If they want to.
15:38I can talk to Sarah and Ellen alone then, that's fine.
15:41Sounds good to me.
15:42I thought our friendship was more than that.
15:44I did too.
15:44But the way that you acted kind of showed that it really didn't mean anything.
15:48Let's not, like, be like that.
15:53You let me know when you're ready.
15:54Okie doke.
15:57Not sure what her intentions are.
15:59Maybe she's trying to weasel her way back in the house.
16:02I don't want to hear it.
16:03I'm not listening.
16:05I'm out.
16:05I'm going to go do something.
16:07There's plenty of chores to get done.
16:09Sarah and Ellen, I'll talk to you over here then.
16:11And then, Esmeralda, if you're open to talking.
16:14But if not, then I didn't come out for nothing.
16:17Yeah, yeah, yeah.
16:18Judah.
16:26Kendra just walked up.
16:27She's like, can I talk to you for a minute?
16:29And I'm like, if they want to.
16:30She wants to talk to everybody.
16:36I'm shaking.
16:37You're fine.
16:38I'm like, I'm actually so nervous.
16:42Hi boys.
16:44Would you like to join in this conversation?
16:48Kendra left.
16:49Not sure why she's here.
16:51Guess we'll see.
17:00You know, this whole experience is supposed to be, like, powerful and liberating, and I feel like I've been knocked
17:07down.
17:08Like, I feel like the light that I had for this whole thing has just been, like, completely sucked out
17:12of me.
17:12And, like, I've never had this much, like, depression and anxiety.
17:16It's just, like, it hasn't been great.
17:19I've gone through so much.
17:20The food.
17:21I haven't been eating.
17:22No air conditioning.
17:23And I'm still here.
17:25If we can go through some stuff, y'all can too.
17:27BJ come up and see us, like, oh, Kendra's here, and I'm like, yo.
17:30BJ, what?
17:30I said you came up.
17:32Come over here.
17:32I don't, I'm not, I'm not going to engage, but I will say, what makes you feel that you both
17:38are entitled to just go have some alone time in a hotel room, like you didn't sign up, like the
17:43rest of us, to live Amish?
17:46What Amish couple do you know that just goes and spends at a hotel?
17:52The .
17:53You don't feel like you owe all of us an apology for how you both acted?
17:58And now, I think it's okay, I thought about it.
18:01I feel like I should give them an apology.
18:03I don't think it's sincere and respectfully don't want to hear it.
18:08But right now I'm so angry because I feel like you should know me better.
18:12I don't take it lightly.
18:15So if we're just sincere in our actions and our everyday one tooth, we don't have to second guess it,
18:20we don't have to worry about it.
18:21I don't give a if the cameras are watching me because I will say it if they're not or if
18:26they are.
18:27Trifling ass bitch.
18:44It's like she's so disrespectful.
18:50I don't want to hear it.
18:51I got to do.
18:52I feel like we're wasting day.
18:56I feel so, like, attacked because it's like, again, it was nothing personal to any of you
19:01guys. Like, I was just trying to get out of the house.
19:04I don't think she attacked you. I think she just hurt. She kept it real. You know what
19:07I'm saying?
19:07She also is the person closest to you because she spent the most time with you. So I think
19:11she just, of course, like, of course, she should take it personal. I think what Billy
19:16Joe said definitely is something that Kendra needed to hear because, of course, they spend
19:19the most time together. So she really knows her, you know, from day one.
19:23And I feel like she could have stayed here and maybe, like, she could have come out of
19:26this with a different version of her.
19:33I advise as your friend that y'all need to have a one-on-one conversation.
19:37Yeah.
19:37You say your piece and she can say her piece, but if y'all y'all talking, but y'all
19:41not listening.
19:43I was never intentionally trying to disrespect them or be rude to them at all. Like, it was
19:48a selfish moment for me because I just wanted to get the out of here.
19:52I wanted it to be, like, a genuine conversation with everybody.
20:00I'll talk to you, but away from everybody respectfully?
20:04Yeah.
20:06I have not been anything but a sincere and good friend to Kendra. We've shared so many
20:12things, so I will pull her aside and tell her how I feel. So I'm obviously angry. The way
20:22that you laughed, I felt, was super up to me. From our perspective, we were like, obviously,
20:27they don't want to live the Amish life. I felt like another friend, like, does what a boy wants
20:32and f*** everybody else. Yes, I was f***ing mad. From my perspective, you and I promised
20:39each other we wouldn't leave each other. It had nothing to do with you. We went on a date
20:45and we wanted to get to know each other without 20 people there. That's why we went to the hotel.
20:49But from a perspective of Amish, you just did something non-Amish, dirty, and left all this
20:55Amish home for us.
20:57I'm not Amish. That's the thing. I'm trying. Like, I'm learning. And I feel like I got treated
21:03as if I grew up Amish.
21:05Yeah.
21:06And they're holding me to this standard. And it's, like, it's not a normal thing for me.
21:10So, like, you're right. No, you're right. You know, and that's why I think that's what
21:15made me really realize, like, okay, maybe I'm not cut out.
21:18Meant to be. Yeah.
21:22But I love you, regardless. We've shared our most intimate, don't cry. I just don't want
21:28you to get upset with me.
21:33Don't cry. Don't cry. Don't cry. Don't cry. Don't cry.
21:36Don't feel bad. It's over.
21:37I just feel bad because, like, you were the closest one to me in the house.
21:41And I'm still the closest in the house.
21:42I know, but then, like, hearing you, like, talk to me like that, I know, but it's, it's
21:46hard.
21:47And I'm sorry I yelled at you like that.
21:51Oh, gosh.
21:52But, okay, thank you.
21:54You're welcome. I love you.
21:54I'm sorry I'm not staying.
21:56But.
21:57That's okay.
21:58I feel like Keita Kenva, I'm worried that she doesn't want to be using help of nobody,
22:04but also it's sad to see your vote.
22:06You know, I just, like, I, like, genuinely appreciate all you guys.
22:10We appreciate you.
22:11Yeah, I'm sorry.
22:12I couldn't, like, stick it out with you guys.
22:14I love you.
22:15I love you.
22:17Bye.
22:22It kind of sucks to see Kendra leave.
22:25I mean, all the time and effort is kind of wasted.
22:32She has this potential to be a good Amish wife.
22:36It would have been nice to have her around longer.
22:39I think there's natural chemistry.
22:43I think that if Matt and Kendra would have been given an honest chance, if they would have
22:49been, if we would have treated them right, and then they would have stayed.
22:55The biggest reason why they left is because of the way that we didn't do our part.
23:00We've done something extremely wrong.
23:03Because there should be no reason for them to want to leave.
23:29Our original plan is to start with six people to build a community.
23:35Right now we have four.
23:40Right now the mission looks kind of rough.
23:44Was this the right thing to do?
23:47I'm not sure yet how we're going to get back on the rails, but we've committed ourselves to
23:53it and we're just going to make do with whatever stays.
24:03Today I'm giving Judah and Esmeralda a lesson on fishing.
24:07It provides food.
24:10It also is a time to connect with nature.
24:23Do you want to try it?
24:24Okay, I think I'm ready.
24:30I still have phobias about farm living.
24:34I've grown so much, but I'm sorry, worms are still grossing me out.
24:39You getting it, Judah?
24:40I'm trying to figure out how to wrap it around.
24:41Do I just double?
24:42Yeah, just double it up.
24:44You getting it, Judah?
24:45I don't know.
24:45Can you come look at it for me real quick?
24:48Take the string back and hold it with your finger.
24:52Oh!
24:53Oh!
24:54Oh!
24:56There!
25:00Touch it!
25:02Just grab it.
25:03Just grab it fast.
25:04You're doing it.
25:05You're doing it.
25:05Oh, I'm proud of you.
25:07Oh, I'm so proud of you.
25:08Oh!
25:10Good job!
25:12Yeah!
25:12Alan's a pretty patient teacher.
25:14I would always think that my dad or, you know, someone like that would have shown me how
25:18to fish, but I obviously never grew up with, like, a dad that was super present.
25:24So I think it was nice to have Alan kind of, you know, stepping in and playing that role.
25:32Okay, Judah.
25:33Your turn.
25:35Okay.
25:37Good.
25:37Oh, that was a good throw.
25:38There he is.
25:39Get him.
25:41Oh.
25:41He's trying to run off.
25:42Oh, he has a slick one.
25:43Jerk it.
25:43Oh, I don't know how to jerk it.
25:45Jerk it.
25:46Wait.
25:46Whoa, get that away from me.
25:48Oh!
25:49Oh!
25:51Get it!
25:52Judah, get it.
25:53All right.
25:54All right.
25:54You got this.
25:55Oh, man.
25:56That...
25:57Just grab it.
25:59Just don't think about it.
26:03Man, bro, this looks so hard, bro.
26:05As he did it, you can too.
26:07Yeah, if I can do it.
26:08I got it.
26:09I got it.
26:09I got it.
26:10You got it.
26:10I got it.
26:11Close my hand, please.
26:12Close my hand.
26:14Close it quick.
26:15Close it quick.
26:15I can't.
26:16I literally can't.
26:17I can't.
26:18I'm really trying.
26:19I'm really trying.
26:21You're a man.
26:22Come on.
26:22Yeah.
26:22You can do it.
26:23We gotta get this little boy back in the water.
26:25I know.
26:25I can.
26:26I can.
26:26I can do this.
26:27I can do this.
26:27I can do this.
26:29You're like the little engine that could, Juna.
26:31Come on.
26:34Okay.
26:35That's cool.
26:36Right there.
26:37Close it fast.
26:37Close.
26:39There you go.
26:39Throw it back.
26:41Oh, I'm doing it.
26:43Get it.
26:43It's in his eye.
26:46I did it.
26:47Yeah.
26:48There you go.
26:49There you go.
26:50Yeah.
26:52Yeah.
26:54Yay.
26:54Did you get a little fish?
26:56Yeah.
26:57Aw, so proud of him.
26:58Yeah.
27:00I'm very proud of Judah for the tremendous effort that he's made and put into this whole project.
27:07I have personally seen Judah basically start growing up and becoming a man.
27:12And it makes me feel good.
27:13I mean, he is like, I mean, he's like a son to me.
27:20Alan, I do want to say though, I appreciate you for being patient and teaching me things
27:24while I'm here and really accepting me through this homage experience.
27:29Because, you know, I'm not used to people being patient and walking me through things.
27:34Well, Judah, I have seen a lot of growth in you.
27:38You have come a long way.
27:40I'm proud of you for that.
27:42Alan's telling me he's proud of me is like, makes me want to cry.
27:47You know, I'm out here doing things that I never thought I would do.
27:50I've grown so much.
27:51And when I first came here, I didn't even want to eat off of people's plates.
27:55You know what I'm saying?
27:55So the fact that I'm going in barns, the fact that I'm taking fish off the hooks and doing
28:00all this crazy stuff, I'm so proud of myself.
28:02And I started here and I'm like, now I'm just up here.
28:06I have to decide whether I'm going to remain here and continue my Amish life or, you know,
28:11go back home.
28:12And it's just such a big decision.
28:13I feel like I've been away from home for so long that I don't even know what life is like
28:17back there.
28:18Coming here made me see maybe I don't need so much of like the materialistic things, but I also have
28:24like learned a lot.
28:25I kind of found the confidence in myself, you know, becoming more comfortable in those uncomfortable situations a lot of
28:31the time.
28:32I've never felt a sense of accomplishment and purpose as I do right now.
28:37So if you ask me right now, if I'm staying Amish, hell yeah.
28:41But at the same time, there's another voice in my head that's telling me like,
28:44you have to have a conversation with these people about who you are and what you're going through.
28:49And you can't, you got to just be real.
28:55Stop playing with me.
28:57Yeah.
28:58But I'm going to take my win today and be grateful for that.
29:39I don't want to be in this house anymore. I don't want to be a part of this.
29:49I can't associate myself with people who lie, with people who deceive.
30:17I feel like I did my best in setting a good example, but I need a better leader.
30:29And, yeah.
30:32And, yeah.
30:36This is not what we're here for.
30:38We're supposed to teach them how to be Amish.
30:42And I just, I don't want to be part of it anymore.
30:44Come on.
30:50Bye.
30:55If you're leaving, have anything to do with James?
30:59I don't really understand what you're talking about.
31:10Whatever James does is up to him.
31:13I'm done.
31:16It's not worth it.
31:18You're not going to change my mind.
31:20Just accept it.
31:56There's a lot of unrest that you really can't see on the surface.
32:01I think that everything with Matt, with Kendra, with James, all that drama, I think that we
32:10all came in this together.
32:11So I miss the presence of Matt and Kendra, but at the same time, they made their choices.
32:21House is on edge.
32:23Everybody's nervous and we're all just trying to kind of support one another and make sure
32:30everybody that's on deck is still okay.
32:33And then James lets us know he wants to talk about something.
32:46Um, Emma decided to leave last night.
32:54Why?
32:56The way we handled some of the thing with Matt and Kendra.
33:00She decided she didn't want to be part of it anymore.
33:04What is going on?
33:05Where, where's everybody going?
33:08With the Amish and their secrets, who's going to tell me, you know, James isn't talking.
33:14There's times when things happen when it's out of control and it does, it just happens and
33:19you can't stop it.
33:24I don't know if Emma left because of how James handled the Matt and Kendra situation.
33:27I don't know if it's because James is giving more attention to Kendra than her.
33:32I don't know why anything's going on.
33:35This is what a church split feels like.
33:37I feel like Emma may have just been tired of all the attention that Kendra,
33:42is getting.
33:44I feel like this whole situation with Kendra was maybe just the last straw for her.
33:49I think it would be fair to say that Emma felt like the mission was maybe falling apart.
33:55I guess partly she felt like we weren't really truly representing the Amish.
34:04Maybe Emma leaving has something to do with jealousy.
34:08It doesn't feel like James is being completely honest.
34:12We were given this opportunity to live and experience the Amish life, which we're doing.
34:18And unfortunately, we have people that have chosen to move elsewhere and they're not coming back.
34:24They're gone.
34:25And we're moving forward.
34:30Well, we've definitely made some mistakes, but we have to pick up the pieces and keep going.
34:35I mean, if the bishop starts blaming me for this, he might not want to take me back into the
34:41church ever.
34:42We don't want to lose more people.
34:44Right.
34:44I will tell you one thing right now that we really do need, and that is more communication among each
34:51other.
34:52Yeah.
34:52Yeah.
34:53I think things got a little too dramatic for Emma, and that is the reason why she left.
35:00I would totally agree with that.
35:03The drama was overwhelming for her, and she was very frustrated.
35:09It feels like the house is falling apart.
35:14I do know that I'm going to have to talk with my brother, Bishop.
35:20Bishop, it's not going to be good for James.
35:24What James did, it's a little selfish.
35:27Matt, Kendra, Emma leaving.
35:29It puts the whole mission at stake.
35:45I'm going to have to talk with my brother, Bishop, about the drama that we've had.
35:52We're just going to have to figure out what needs to be done and what we can do.
36:01Welcome.
36:04So how are you?
36:05Good.
36:06How have things been going?
36:08Oh, lately kind of rough.
36:12Matt, Kendra, and Emma left.
36:18Why don't we sit?
36:26Tell me what happened.
36:30Well, what I'm piecing together is that Matt and Kendra did go to a motel.
36:39James went after them.
36:42What happened after that?
36:44They just grabbed their clothes, what they could find real quick, and left.
36:48They left.
36:49They were done talking.
36:53That's kind of sad.
36:55For Matt and Kendra to go to the motel was definitely not the highest level of moral excellency they could
37:03have achieved.
37:04My biggest disappointment was that they didn't talk to me afterwards.
37:08I didn't know it was happening.
37:09I had no control over it.
37:11But then having them leave disappointed me simply because I felt like they needed some guidance.
37:23How did Emma respond to all of this?
37:25I think there's a lot more going on with Emma and James.
37:45So Matt and Kendra were like, well, if they do, why can't we?
37:49Like, what's the use?
37:50We can have this back where we came from.
37:53Yes.
37:54It's morally wrong to live in fornication or adultery.
38:01All of us face temptations one way or another.
38:04And I'm not saying that just for Matt and Kendra.
38:07James and Emma had the same scenario in their own lives.
38:10We face temptations all the time.
38:13We're trying to give them tools how to deal with it.
38:17And obviously we didn't give them the right tools.
38:19We only have a week left of this experience.
38:22As house parents, it's your job to try to get everybody back on track.
38:27Can you tell me what's one change we could make?
38:30The only thing that right now that I can think of, I do know that Kendra was missing her mom,
38:40not having contact with her mom.
38:43Would it be important to have them continue to have contact with family?
38:52I think that would be a huge improvement.
38:56For the four people left, I'm hoping they can connect with their families at home.
39:02That in return will help grow their love of the Amish experience and embracing it and joining the Amish church.
39:20If we continue making the wrong choices, we continue reaping a wrong harvest.
39:35Esmeralda, what do you think so far?
39:39I think so far, I feel like there's so much more space now.
39:42It looks a lot cleaner.
39:54Oh, oh, I see someone rolling up.
40:09I see this car pulling up.
40:12And it's my mama.
40:14Last time I spoke to my mama, she was telling me not to come, but I still made it here.
40:20I'm like, what are you doing here?
40:21He ain't got no business being out here.
40:26Hadn't heard from my son.
40:27It's been several weeks.
40:30As a mama bear, this is what we do.
40:32Especially when you love your child, your family, anybody.
40:35You go and find them and you make sure that they're okay.
40:41I'm really intimidated.
40:43This is going to be tough.
40:49I definitely plan on taking my son home with me.
40:52If he doesn't want to go back home with me, there will definitely be a fight.
41:01Still to come on Suddenly Amish.
41:04I want to show my mama every inch of this damn farm.
41:08Come on in, you're fine.
41:10They're having dinner.
41:10I'm not trying to be on the menu.
41:12My mission at the end of the day is to get my son out of here.
41:15It's like you always wanted me to be great.
41:16And when I find something that I feel like I'm thriving again,
41:18it's like you're trying to pull me away from that.
41:21She doesn't want me to be here, clearly.
41:23Hello.
41:25Hello.
41:25I'm just hanging out with some of these people.
41:27I don't understand how people can live like this.
41:33I would like to get you to the hospital.
41:37I'm really worried for her because she does not look good.
41:39Oh my God.
41:40Oh my God.
41:41Oh my God.
41:42Oh my God.
41:45Tomorrow is a big day.
41:47The bishop is going to decide if you stay or not.
41:50Me and Alan could put in a good word if we desire to.
41:53Some of my best friends are gay.
41:56And if I were gay, then I would not be able to be a part of the community.
42:00Is that what you're saying?
42:05With Reckoning Day, the community, the Amish church,
42:08I'm literally surrendering all my control to them.
42:11Could each of you maybe stand and say your piece?
42:15It's a lifelong decision to give up all that I love to be part of the community.
42:20Jesus said, he who lays his hand to the plow and looks back is not worthy of his kingdom.
42:26It's a decision for life.
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