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Short filmTranscript
00:01Previously on Desperate Housewives
00:03I have another child in it.
00:05You're the one that gave me permission, remember?
00:07Not to sleep with the woman who's carrying our child!
00:10For some, love will wither.
00:11Do I know you?
00:12Orson Hodge, Susan's dentist friend.
00:14While others will wait for love.
00:17For others, new love will bloom.
00:25That may never arrive.
00:30Something awful happened on Lakeview Drive last year.
00:35To understand why, you need to know that when Alma Hodge awoke that morning,
00:40she had no idea this would be the day she'd leave her husband.
00:44Certainly, it began normally enough.
00:47She put away the groceries per his instructions.
00:51She hung his dry cleaning exactly as he had requested.
00:56She folded the towels just as he had taught her.
01:02It was just before noon.
01:05Mama loves your baby.
01:07Does the baby love Mama?
01:09Mama!
01:10When something inside Alma broke,
01:13and she decided it was time to fly away.
01:17Of course, she knew better than to say this to her husband.
01:22He thought Alma was happy.
01:24And Orson Hodge did not like to be contradicted.
01:28So she waited till he left for work.
01:32And then...
01:33And then...
01:34And then...
01:35Baby, you've got to come down now, Mama's in a hurry.
01:55Hurry, hurry.
01:57If you don't get back in your cage right now, I'm going to have to leave you behind, please.
02:03The next day, Carolyn Bixby stopped by.
02:27And like most nosy neighbors, she knew you learned more if you didn't knock.
02:32Alma?
02:34Are you home?
02:39Carolyn?
02:41I'm just looking for Alma.
02:42We had a coffee date this morning.
02:44She never showed.
02:46Alma left yesterday.
02:48Left?
02:50We had a bit of a row.
02:52Harvey and I thought we heard some raised voices.
02:55So, where'd she go?
02:57I don't know.
02:58I wouldn't worry about it.
02:59I'm sure she's fine.
03:00Orson, no!
03:02Orson, no!
03:04So, if I hear from Alma, I'll let her know that you dropped by.
03:17Yes, Orson Hodge was a man who did not like to be contradicted.
03:34By anyone.
03:35It doesn't rain very often in the town of Fairview, but when it does, it pours.
03:52It was on just such a day that Brie Vandekamp went on her first date with her new friend,
03:58Orson Hodge.
03:59A date that ended with a kiss in the rain.
04:04This occurred just as Gabrielle Solis was conferring with her new divorce lawyer,
04:09and describing in vivid detail her husband's affair with their maid,
04:14who also happened to be their surrogate.
04:19Meanwhile, Lynette Scava was busy meeting her husband's illegitimate daughter,
04:25while resisting the urge to strangle the girl's mother.
04:31This happened just after Susan Meyer learned Mike Delfino had been badly injured in a hit-and-run accident,
04:40and was now in a coma at Fairview Memorial Hospital.
04:44At that same moment, Edie Britt was putting up a for-sale sign on the lawn of the house where I once lived.
04:52Edie had also planned to spruce up the property by washing down the driveway,
04:58but she was pleased to see the rain had already taken care of that.
05:04This is what rainy days are good for.
05:07They make everything clean again.
05:10Which is necessary on a street like Wisteria Lane,
05:15where everything can get so messy.
05:19Welcome! Welcome!
05:25Oh! Don't worry about the water, though.
05:40The floor's a lamp. Here's a flyer.
05:43Then the police found her severed fingers in the garage.
05:46Oh, no.
05:47And they never found Felicia's body.
05:49I wouldn't be surprised if someday you opened a cabinet.
05:52Hello.
05:53Karen, dear, have you seen the marble backsplash?
05:56Oh, I just must show it to you.
05:58Excuse us.
05:59What are you trying to do to be a backstabbing cow?
06:02They asked why the owner was selling.
06:04I told them that Paul Young was in jail.
06:06They asked why.
06:07The conversation has a flow.
06:09Well, knock it off.
06:10I've been trying to unload this house of horrors for months now,
06:12and you are not helping.
06:14Ha, ha, ha!
06:15Those are for potential buyers!
06:17Withered old mooch.
06:18Good luck trying to find one of those.
06:20Maybe you'll have an easier time with the Apple White House
06:22or that rec room in the basement.
06:24Get out.
06:25Get out.
06:26Get out.
06:27Get out.
06:28Get out.
06:29Katie?
06:30Uh, do you have a moment, please?
06:31Yes!
06:32Yes!
06:33Yes!
06:34Yes!
06:35Yes!
06:36Yes!
06:37Yes!
06:38Settle down.
06:39Come on!
06:41Kayla ready yet?
06:42Just a sec.
06:43Honey, thank you for this.
06:44I know, it's a little weird.
06:46I mean, to send out a family Christmas photo with your husband's love job,
06:49but it means a lot to her to feel included.
06:51No problem.
06:52She's a great little girl.
06:53Okay.
06:54All right.
06:55Let's do this.
06:56I'm just going to, um, check the focus.
07:02Nora!
07:03Lynette.
07:04Uh-huh.
07:05What are you doing there?
07:07Well, it's a family photo, right?
07:10Tom, could I, could I, could I check your tie again?
07:15She sat down so quickly.
07:18Didn't know what to say.
07:19How about you're in the frame, bitch?
07:20Move.
07:21Lynette.
07:22No, I am sorry.
07:23How much of her crap do I have to put up with?
07:26First, it's a little drop-by's.
07:27Then she's inviting herself to dinner three times a week.
07:30Now she wants to be in our Christmas photo.
07:31I'm sorry.
07:32No, that's not happening.
07:33Hey, guys.
07:34Don't fight.
07:35It's the holidays.
07:38Nora, this is just for our family.
07:42I would prefer if you weren't in it.
07:48Oh.
07:51Okay.
07:52Kayla, honey, we gotta go.
07:55They're kicking us out.
07:57We didn't say that Kayla couldn't be in the photo.
08:00Yeah, well, you know what?
08:01If I'm not your family, then she's not your family.
08:04It's okay.
08:05I don't have to be in the picture.
08:09Fine.
08:10Fine.
08:11No, absolutely fine.
08:12Put crazy at the end and we can crap her out later.
08:14Fair enough.
08:15Fair enough.
08:16Hey, everything's okay.
08:17It's okay.
08:18Come on, guys.
08:19Come on back.
08:20Thank you, Lynette.
08:21That's the Christmas spirit that I was looking for.
08:22Ten seconds.
08:23Okay.
08:24I think this is a little stiff.
08:25I have a really fun idea.
08:26Where are my crackers?
08:27We're out.
08:28But I got you a pickle.
08:29Pickles and soup.
08:30Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
08:33Pickles and soup.
08:55Pickles and soup!
08:56Who eats that?
08:57You know, that's all I got.
08:59Ever heard of a store?
09:01You did not just do that.
09:08I hate pickles.
09:09Pick it up.
09:10Doctors say I only get out of bed to pee.
09:13Better for baby.
09:15Remember?
09:23Don't go.
09:25I need you to rub my feet.
09:27They're sore.
09:29And doctors say...
09:30Oh, cut it out, Xiao Mei.
09:31The doctor didn't say anything about rubbing your chubby stumps.
09:34Rub them yourself.
09:36You treat me like dirt.
09:39Would you rather I live with Mr. Solis
09:41in a dingy one-bedroom apartment
09:43with no air conditioning and no cable?
09:45Huh?
09:47No, I didn't think so.
09:50You are meanest person I know.
09:53I am the meanest person.
09:55You've been in this country a year.
09:56Modify your nouns, damn it.
09:58What a bitch.
10:01I can't wait for you to pop out that baby.
10:08Because when you do,
10:09I am putting you on the first plane back to Shanghai.
10:11And you're going to be on all fours
10:12and a rice patty before the epidural wears off.
10:16But you promised to get me apartment in Chinatown
10:19so I can work for my friend in restaurants
10:22and start the new life.
10:24Tell it to my Chinese friend.
10:26Sue me!
10:36You know, we do have people here in the hospital
10:38who could do that.
10:39But I like doing it.
10:40And I think Mike would want me to.
10:41Oops.
10:42Oh.
10:50So have you got the results
10:51of his latest MRI hit?
10:52I'm afraid there was no change.
10:54Oh.
10:55Well, how long until you can do another one?
10:57I don't want to tell you not to be optimistic, but...
11:00Look, I know it's been six months,
11:01but he could still come out of it, right?
11:03I saw on the news there was this woman in Peru.
11:04She woke up after ten years.
11:05There's a reason that made the news.
11:08You might think I'm naive,
11:09but I know he's coming back to me.
11:12Susan.
11:12Don't say it.
11:13You just keep doing your job
11:15and I'll keep doing it.
11:17Oops.
11:29That risotto was perfect.
11:32Just like you.
11:33Listen, I hope you saved room for dessert.
11:37I got us something special
11:39from a wonderful little bakery downtown.
11:41Oh.
11:44That is so adorable.
11:46But I don't think I could eat another bite.
11:48Here, let me take half.
11:54What do you say, Brie?
11:56Will you marry me?
11:57This is a little sudden, isn't it?
12:04We've only known each other six months,
12:06but I've loved you every minute of it.
12:11But if you don't share my feelings...
12:13No, no.
12:15I do.
12:16It's just that I can't help being cautious
12:19since, Rex, I haven't been exactly lucky enough.
12:22I used to feel the same way.
12:25When Alma left me, I was shattered,
12:27but I realize now it was the luckiest day of my life
12:29because it meant I was free when I met you.
12:34Luck can change, Brie.
12:37Let me change yours.
12:38Yes.
12:43Yes.
12:45Yes.
12:46Yes, I will marry you for a second.
12:49Yes.
13:08Ian Hainsworth had been miserable
13:18ever since a tragic horseback riding accident
13:22had left his wife, Jane, in a coma.
13:26For the next three years,
13:28he shied away from all social contact
13:31because he wanted to be alone with his grief.
13:34Then one day, he met Susan Meyer
13:38who, because of her own tragedy,
13:42was just as miserable as he was.
13:48And a friendship slowly blossomed
13:51because, as everyone knows,
13:54misery loves company
13:55and Ian was loving this company
13:59more and more every day.
14:04One, two, three, oh, itch, itch, itch, itch, itch, oh, itch, itch, itch.
14:14Did the nurses know you do this?
14:15Oh, hey, um, you weren't supposed to see that.
14:18Well, clearly.
14:19But you can buy my silence if you'll have coffee with me.
14:22Oh, I would love to,
14:23but I think I'm in a rush here.
14:24I'm supposed to meet my girlfriends for lunch at one.
14:26Is it one yet?
14:27Well, you tell me.
14:28I notice you're always rushing into the hall
14:30to check the time,
14:31so I, um, well, I bought you this.
14:34Oh.
14:35Wow.
14:37Um, I, I can't accept this.
14:39This is too extravagant.
14:40Oh, no, it's nothing.
14:41There's a guy in the sidewalk
14:42who had a bunch of them laid out in a blanket.
14:44If you look closely, it says Folex.
14:48Still, I...
14:49Please.
14:49It would make me so happy if you took it.
14:53Well, in that case,
14:55thank you for my cheap knockoff.
14:56Oh, my God.
14:58I'm late.
15:13Hi.
15:13Hi, hi, hi.
15:14Hi.
15:14I'm so sorry.
15:15I'm late.
15:16No, that's fine.
15:18Wow.
15:18White gloves.
15:19What, are we having a luncheon in the 1880s?
15:20Ah, well, it's a very elegant club.
15:23You know, Orson's been a member here for years.
15:25It'll be even nicer when they finish the construction.
15:28So you were very mysterious on the phone.
15:29Why did you want to have lunch?
15:31Well, um, I wanted to invite you to a dinner
15:33that Orson and I are having this Saturday.
15:35So you asked us to a meal to announce another meal?
15:38That's so free of you.
15:41What's the occasion?
15:42Oh, um, no occasion.
15:43Just a little get-together.
15:45What are you being so coy about?
15:47I'm not being coy.
15:48She said coyly.
15:50If you don't tell us, we're not coming.
15:52Oh, all right.
15:56I wanted to wait and make a proper announcement, but...
16:01Orson and I are engaged.
16:02Oh, my gosh!
16:04I'll never see you.
16:05Wow.
16:05Oh.
16:06You move fast.
16:07I know it's quick, but it just feels so right.
16:10Orson is just the most warm, wonderful, generous man.
16:15Oh, generous.
16:17That means he's good in the sack?
16:19Actually, uh, no, we haven't had sex yet.
16:21We're waiting until we get married.
16:27Oh, my God, you're serious?
16:33No sex at all?
16:34Not even...
16:35Whatever you're alluding to, no.
16:38But you're gonna get married.
16:40You wouldn't buy a car without at least taking it for a little test drive.
16:44It's not like you've never slept with a guy you weren't married to.
16:47True.
16:48I have in the past given myself away too freely.
16:50How charming of you to bring that up while I'm announcing my engagement.
16:53But I like to think that I can learn from my mistakes.
16:56So the dinner is at 8 o'clock, and when we make the announcement, please, everybody look surprised.
17:01Well, don't worry.
17:03I'm just gonna replay the look I had when I found out you hadn't banged him yet.
17:05Hey, sexy mama.
17:16That's cute.
17:17So you invited Kayla to Parker's birthday party, right?
17:20Of course.
17:21And?
17:22And?
17:23What did you tell Nora?
17:24I told her that we were picking up Kayla for a quiet afternoon at home.
17:29You lied?
17:29Yeah, you're damn straight, I lied.
17:31I will not have that lunatic ruining one more family gathering.
17:34But Kayla's gonna, you know, tell Nora that we had a party, and I'm just afraid that Nora's gonna blow a gasket.
17:43What?
17:44So what are you saying?
17:45You're more afraid of Nora than you are of me?
17:47Is that what you think I meant?
17:49Because that's still not what I meant.
17:53You scared the hell out of me, baby.
18:01The coffee machine was broken, so I got us a couple of smoothies.
18:03They had strawberry and strawberry.
18:05Well, I hate strawberries, so give me the strawberry.
18:13Hi, Jane.
18:14Nothing, nothing against smoothies, but, um, I wouldn't mind having some real food sometime.
18:18Maybe, maybe we could go to a restaurant.
18:20You mean, like, outside the hospital?
18:22Yeah, you know, like, like a date.
18:24A date?
18:25Oh!
18:26Um...
18:27Yeah, the lovely little bistro down the street.
18:29Sorry.
18:32Oh, well, that sounds, uh, just...
18:34That sounds great.
18:37I mean, I hope that's okay.
18:38Yeah, um...
18:39No, I was, um, I was thinking about how that sounded just now, the, uh, the date thing.
18:49I really sprang it on you out of nowhere.
18:52Yes, you did.
18:53Jane looked cold.
19:02Oh, thanks.
19:05Look, we're, um, we're both in, in difficult situations.
19:08I've been in mine a lot longer than you have, so, uh, if you're not ready, I understand.
19:13If you ever should be, uh, let, let, let me know.
19:16All right.
19:19I am really hungry.
19:21Well, then, let's, um, let's go to the blood bank and swipe some, some sugar cookies.
19:29Um, you might want to give Jane a sponge bath, because she had a little accident.
19:34Hey, Lynette, it's me.
19:49Hey, Mom.
19:54Are you having a party?
19:55Shh, shh, quiet, quiet, quiet, quiet.
19:57No, shh.
19:59Yeah, no, no, of course not.
20:00In fact, we're just having a quiet afternoon at home.
20:04Um, the kids are so bored.
20:06Tom and I were thinking of taking them out for ice cream.
20:09Well, would you tell Kayla that Mommy called to check on her?
20:13Oh, I will, I will, and I'll see you tonight.
20:15Okay.
20:16Bye.
20:19You think she bought it?
20:20No, I think she'll be over here in ten minutes.
20:24Okay, let's move, let's move.
20:25I've got ten bucks here for the kid who can carry the most stuff, okay?
20:30Hey, Gabby, it's Lynette.
20:33Got a little emergency here.
20:34Is it okay if we use your back guard?
20:37Great, great.
20:39And we take complete responsibility for whatever the pony does.
20:43I'll be able to get this message soon.
20:46Oh, shh.
20:48My only concern would be the neighborhood.
20:51We really need a quiet place for our retirement.
20:54Oh, are you kidding?
20:55There's no place in Fairview that's more peaceful.
20:58Let me show you the media room.
21:06Okay, go on in.
21:09All the balloons.
21:11All right.
21:12Okay.
21:13All right, that's it, everything's in.
21:16Where's the cake?
21:18Oh.
21:24Yoo-hoo.
21:25Anybody home?
21:33Hello?
21:33Hey, Nora.
21:35Wow, we weren't expecting you until seven.
21:38So where's Kayla?
21:39I thought I told you Tom took the kids to the movies.
21:42Uh-uh.
21:43You said ice cream.
21:46Uh-huh.
21:47After the movies.
21:49Movies, then ice cream, an American tradition.
21:51So was something wrong?
21:58To be honest, I thought that you were lying and having a party.
22:01Oh.
22:02I guess I was wrong.
22:03Oh, apology accepted.
22:05Want me to walk you to your car?
22:06Where did everybody go?
22:17Nora, look, I am sorry I lied.
22:19You know, you gave me no choice.
22:21Lynette, I want my daughter.
22:24Where's the damn party?
22:27No, I'm not telling you where's the party.
22:28No, no, no.
22:44You want it and you're going to have to go through me.
22:46I want my kid, Lynette.
22:49Kayla!
22:50Kayla, come out here now!
22:52What is going on?
22:53Well, first you have a party and you don't invite me.
22:56And then you lie about it.
22:58So now, we're leaving.
23:01Wait a minute.
23:02Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, Kayla.
23:05I'm sorry.
23:06We're sorry.
23:08We shouldn't have done that.
23:10But look, Kayla is having such a good time.
23:12Why don't we all just come on in and have some cake
23:14and we can just, Lynette, Lynette, we can just have fun.
23:17Could you excuse me for one second?
23:19Lynette.
23:20Okay, okay, I know, but what else could I do?
23:24I'm just thinking of Kayla.
23:26I know you are, Tom, and I know you love her.
23:29Why else do you think I'm willing to put up with all this for six months?
23:32Why do you think I'm willing to say to my college roommates,
23:34yes, that's my husband's love child and her mother in our Christmas picture,
23:37because I am your wife.
23:40You always come first with me.
23:44Do I still come first with you?
23:50I guess I'll see you later, Nora.
23:56Well, I'm taking Kayla.
23:58Well, that's a shame.
24:00I've got to go hoist a piñata.
24:04Mommy, they have a piñata.
24:05Fine!
24:16I'll be back at seven.
24:18But there had better be a corner piece of cake waiting for me.
24:24Come on, Galey, go have some.
24:26Go have some.
24:27Thank you for that.
24:36Sure.
24:38I'll be back in 20 minutes.
24:40Can I go buy a piñata?
24:41Sure am.
24:48Xiaomi!
24:48Xiaomi!
24:50Come on out, I have your lunch!
24:55Xiaomi, your favorite sofa's on!
24:56There's a doctor fondling a patient at the operating table.
25:01You're missing it!
25:02I'm getting some Christmas.
25:03Xiaomi!
25:04Oh, yeah.
25:07Xiaomi!
25:08Xiaomi!
25:22Hey, quick question.
25:23Have you, by any chance, seen Xiaomi?
25:25I can't believe you lost our baby.
25:29We're not lose our baby.
25:30Stop saying that.
25:31We know exactly where it is.
25:33Inside some crazy Chinese woman who also stole half a chicken from my fridge.
25:39Hey, quick question.
25:39You're okay, slow down now.
25:41Hi-o, hi-o.
25:42Come on, bye-bye.
25:43Bye-bye.
25:44Hi.
25:45Hi.
25:46Mi Wang.
25:47Right?
25:48Remember me?
25:49Xiaomi lives with me.
25:50You came over.
25:50Remember we had lunch?
25:51You've got some nerve showing your face here.
25:53Get up.
25:54Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
25:55Hey, uh, what happened to that famous Chinese hospitality?
25:58Xiaomi called me.
25:59She said you threatened to send her back to China to work as a slave in a rice paddy.
26:05I...
26:06I may have mentioned deportation, but I didn't think she'd take it personally.
26:10Are you crazy?
26:11It was banter.
26:13I mean, has this country come to the point where you can't joke with the health?
26:17You treat Xiaomi like dirt.
26:19She's just the poor, innocent girl trying to live the American dream, just like your ancestors.
26:24Oh, don't give me that we are the world crap.
26:27That woman's uterus is harboring a stolen baby.
26:29So if you know where she is, you better start talking.
26:31Or else I'm going to get the health department down here and take a closer look at what you're
26:34serving as mooshu pork.
26:35Boy, those people just don't have a sense of humor, do they?
26:45I'm telling you, at this number, it's not going to last long.
26:48Well, we like the neighborhood, but we've heard that some odd things have gone on with
26:51this house.
26:53Complete fabrication.
26:54Malicious lies spread by jealous competitors.
26:56Now you've got to check out the storage.
26:59You're not going to believe what you've put in here.
27:00And now the media room.
27:08Wow, you certainly devoured that ice cream.
27:11Can I get you anything else?
27:12You tell me.
27:14Hmm.
27:15Orson.
27:16Hmm.
27:17Hmm.
27:19Hmm.
27:20I thought we...
27:21Orson.
27:22Hmm.
27:23I just assumed, now that we're engaged.
27:25Does that change our core values?
27:27No.
27:28But when I saw you standing in front of the freezer in a cleanly silk dress, let's just
27:33say, well, we challenged them.
27:35Well, I thought we agreed we wanted our wedding night to be perfect.
27:38Yes.
27:39Actors want opening night to be perfect.
27:41That's why they rehearse.
27:42Hmm.
27:43It'll be better this way.
27:46Now, can I get you some more ice cream?
27:50Not in that dress.
27:51Hi.
28:06So I need to ask you something.
28:15Ian, you know, from across the hall.
28:21You met him.
28:24Anyway.
28:26He sort of asked me out.
28:29On a date.
28:32I know you're thrown.
28:34I was thrown, too.
28:36But he's really nice.
28:38And I could sort of use someone to talk to.
28:46Who also talks back.
28:54The thing is, I'm sort of lonely.
28:57And the past six months have been really hard on me.
29:05So what I need is, I need to know if it's okay with you if I go out with him.
29:12Because if it's not, I won't.
29:18In fact, I'd like nothing better than for you to just wake up right now and tell me not to go out with him.
29:23Just wake up and tell me.
29:25Wake up.
29:27Please.
29:27Please.
29:31Okay.
29:34All right.
29:39I'll see you tomorrow.
29:42I love you.
29:53It is really just dinner.
30:07I'm just dropping off Carlos and then I'll be by to pick her up.
30:11Okay.
30:11Thanks, Edie.
30:12I'll see you tomorrow.
30:14Xiaomi is fine.
30:16Crisis averted.
30:17No harm, no foul.
30:18How can you say that?
30:19You endangered the life of our baby today.
30:21Don't you dare give me that attitude.
30:23You have no idea what I've been going through these past six months.
30:26Ah, here we go.
30:27I have had to wait hand and foot on your mistress.
30:30I mean, imagine if the day after you found out about John Roland, you had to make his lunch and rub his feet.
30:35Yeah, well, John Roland wasn't carrying our kid.
30:37Forgive me for being concerned about our surrogate.
30:41Xiaomi is going to be fine.
30:43Once that baby comes, her slate is wiped clean.
30:45She's going to walk away, go off and live her American dream.
30:49Me?
30:49I'm going to be stuck.
30:50A single mother raising a child alone.
30:53Haggling with lawyers on who gets the kid at Christmas.
30:58My American dream is officially dead.
31:00I'm sorry.
31:09Just so you know, my dream is that...
31:11Okay, so we will see you Saturday.
31:21And please pretend to be surprised.
31:23Bye.
31:25Told someone else?
31:27Breathe.
31:28I thought the whole point of the party was to announce our engagement.
31:30I just can't help it.
31:32I like telling people.
31:34It makes me feel...
31:36I don't know.
31:36It makes me feel like I'm starting over.
31:38It feels good.
31:40It feels good to me, too, though.
31:41Hmm.
31:43Ah, no hand, see?
31:46Hmm.
31:48Hmm.
31:50You don't have to wash those.
31:52I already did them.
31:53Oh, I found some streaks.
31:55So I'm wiping them down with undiluted red wine vinegar.
32:00I've never heard that.
32:02Oh, sure.
32:03But for tougher spots, I use a 50-50 mix of denatured alcohol and water.
32:10Remember those really intractable stains?
32:13I mean, we're talking shower doors.
32:16I wipe on lacquer thinner with a towel.
32:18Oh, no.
32:24Free.
32:24Free?
32:30Fuck!
32:37Oh, my God.
32:41Come on.
32:43Come on.
32:45Come on.
32:46Uh, excuse me?
32:52Hmm?
32:52Did you lose something?
32:55No, I just thought, for you.
33:00Oh, um, I don't do that.
33:03Why not?
33:04I'm a Republican.
33:06I'm a Libertarian.
33:07I believe in minimizing the role of the state and maximizing individual rights.
33:11But Orson!
33:13Trust me, I know what I'm doing.
33:16Oh, no!
33:34What?
33:35You didn't just crack that veneer again, did you?
33:37I have to go.
33:39Go?
33:41Go where?
33:43And then it was like something inside ruptured.
33:45Well, not so much a rupture as a spasm.
33:49Waves of this hot clutching.
33:51I think I might have had a small stroke.
33:54How severe were the pains?
33:56Well, that's the odd thing.
33:57I mean, there was no pain, per se.
33:59In fact, it wasn't entirely unpleasant.
34:02What were you doing at the time?
34:04I was, uh, with my fiancée.
34:08We were lying down.
34:10Resting.
34:11I'm going to take a wild swing here.
34:13Were you having sex?
34:16Sort of.
34:18Miss Vandercamp, I think you may have had an orgasm.
34:22No, no, no.
34:22I've had orgasms before.
34:24How would you describe them?
34:25Oh, you know, that warm sensation, that tingling feeling of relief when it's over.
34:30No, no, this was much...
34:32Better?
34:34Yes.
34:34That's because it was an orgasm.
34:39Oh.
34:41Come on, I'll be dark.
35:00Hi, can I help you?
35:20Are you Bree Vandercamp?
35:22Yes, and you are?
35:24Carolyn Bigspeed.
35:25I was Orson's neighbor.
35:27Oh, well, come on in, let's dry you off and get you a drink.
35:33I didn't come here to celebrate.
35:36Carolyn.
35:38Engaged again, that was quick work.
35:41Does she know you killed your wife?
35:46My wife left me.
35:49And no one ever heard from her again.
35:52Not me, not her family.
35:54Just dropped off the face of the earth.
35:57Morrison, what is she talking about?
36:02Couldn't tell you that part, did he?
36:04All right, Carolyn, you've made your little sue.
36:05You keep your hands off me.
36:09Don't let him fool you.
36:10Get away from him now while you can.
36:16Please leave my house.
36:18What?
36:19Be a fool.
36:20Marry him.
36:22Just don't be surprised when you go missing, too.
36:24I'm sorry you had to endure that.
36:44Your wife disappeared?
36:54I tried to find her.
36:56Her family claimed not to have heard from her.
37:00Personally, I think she was just trying to punish me.
37:03So, are you still married?
37:08No.
37:09I was granted a divorce on grounds of abandonment.
37:14Brie.
37:17You can't possibly think that...
37:19No, of course not.
37:20I love you.
37:27Ted, I love you.
37:32Of course.
37:34My hand.
37:35The buffet is open.
38:02Brie.
38:04Brie.
38:05Every storm brings with it hope
38:33That somehow by morning, everything will be made clean again
38:38And even the most troubling stains will have disappeared
38:42Like the doubts over his innocence
38:46Or the consequence of his mistake
38:52Like the scars of his betrayal
39:03Or the memory of his kiss
39:07So we wait for the storm to pass
39:14Hoping for the best
39:16Even though we know in our hearts
39:24Some stains are so indelible
39:28Nothing can wash them away
39:32Thank you
39:42Thank you
39:43Thank you
39:44Thank you
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