- 13 minutes ago
Coronation Street - Season 67 Episode 17 - Monday, 26Th January 2026
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Short filmTranscript
00:00MUSIC
00:26What are you doing?
00:27I've been answering my calls.
00:28Have they had to be in all night?
00:30Is it true or not?
00:32Morning.
00:33Morning.
00:34Hey, I've been meaning to ask this lad something for a while.
00:37How fast can you run 5K?
00:39I've started jogging again, you see.
00:41Oh, that's great.
00:42Yeah, well, I'm trying.
00:44Recently brought the half-an-hour barrier.
00:46Not with ease, obviously.
00:4816.29.
00:4916.29? Are you joking?
00:52Wow.
00:54Hey, I should borrow it.
00:5516.29, that's ridiculous.
00:57Look, I've been doing this for four years.
01:05Out of the hundred or so young athletes I've coached,
01:09probably half of them had a crush on me.
01:11Boys mainly, but girls as well.
01:15Lee was particularly bad.
01:20He was clingy.
01:23Messaging me all the time.
01:25Chocolates, the expensive kind.
01:27He, erm...
01:29He sent me a picture with his top off, so I had to be firm with him.
01:33He didn't have sex with him.
01:34No.
01:35He didn't kiss him.
01:36Get your boss.
01:37Let me in.
01:38Look, Leanne's in the shower.
01:39Take two minutes.
01:40Hello.
01:41Oh.
01:42Hiya.
01:43Sorry, it was open.
01:44Is everybody decent?
01:45Hang on a minute.
01:46David's naked in the kitchen.
01:47What?
01:48Jokes.
01:49Don't do that to me.
01:50I was just on the way to the hospital.
01:51I wanted a word with your sister.
01:52Ah.
01:53Hey.
01:54Do not get into bed with Cal Webster.
01:55Literally all otherwise.
01:56He is a bad, bad seed.
01:57Oh, you think that's enough to put me off?
01:58It's my type, bad seeds.
01:59Really?
02:00Interesting.
02:01Oh, no.
02:02She left her husband for him.
02:03Turns out he was diddling bloke down road.
02:04Bloke?
02:05Calls bi.
02:06He's bisexual.
02:07No lingual.
02:08Calls bi.
02:09Casual?
02:10Casual?
02:11Casual?
02:12Casual?
02:13Casual?
02:14Casual?
02:15Casual?
02:16Casual?
02:17Casual?
02:18Casual?
02:19Casual?
02:20Casual?
02:21Casual?
02:22Casual?
02:23Casual?
02:24Casual?
02:25Casual?
02:26Casual?
02:27Casual?
02:28Casual?
02:29Casual?
02:30Right, quick look.
02:31Women often miss the warning signs because we're too busy getting charmed and flattered
02:35or whatever, but, well, I am the warning sign.
02:38Mmm.
02:39Take it from someone who knows.
02:41Understood.
02:42Is that my cap?
02:44I'll leave you to it.
02:46See ya.
02:47Ooh!
02:48It is.
02:49I'm off too.
02:50Oh, give Harper a kiss for me.
02:51I will.
02:52Hey, don't forget what's said about the griddle.
02:53Switch on the left.
02:54The right!
02:55What?
02:56You kidding?
02:57No.
02:58Turned up in a halfway house.
02:59Library card's in the pocket as well.
03:00Look inside.
03:01Paul's ashes?
03:02What?
03:03The odds?
03:04Morning, Rye.
03:05Morning.
03:06Morning.
03:07Morning.
03:08Morning.
03:09Ah, morning.
03:10You don't know who that belongs to, do you?
03:11Found it in the living room before.
03:12I think it's Daniels.
03:13Oh, Daniels?
03:14Talk about down with the kids.
03:15I know.
03:17I'll give it back to you.
03:18All right.
03:19Bye, Sam.
03:20Bye, Sam.
03:21Bye.
03:22Bye.
03:23Bye.
03:24Bye.
03:25Bye.
03:26Bye.
03:27Bye.
03:28Bye.
03:29Bye.
03:30Bye.
03:31Bye.
03:32Bye.
03:33Bye.
03:34Bye.
03:35Bye.
03:36Bye.
03:37Bye.
03:38Bye.
03:39Bye.
03:40Bye.
03:41Bye.
03:43Bye.
03:46There you go.
03:48Hey.
03:49Fair place to whoever stole the bag.
03:51It's like a message from someone.
03:53I mean, I don't want to say God, but, uh, Billy, perhaps?
03:57Yeah, that's what I thought.
04:00Mm-hmm.
04:01The universe?
04:03There's nowhere else like it.
04:06Right.
04:07Listen.
04:08I've got to get to the wholesalers.
04:09You OK?
04:10Yeah, of course.
04:11Cool.
04:12Sorry, we're all out.
04:41Ken bought the last tin yesterday.
04:43Apparently Cassie is a fiend for him.
04:45Alice suffers from travel sickness.
04:48How far she had to come?
04:49From the South Lakes.
04:50She's visiting a cousin while she's down.
04:52An auntie too, I believe.
04:54Killing two birds with one stone?
04:56Three birds.
04:57Roy, the cousin, the auntie.
04:59I thought I'd give her some as a gift.
05:02Dev sells them.
05:03Since when?
05:04Since they started flying off my shelves.
05:06And he's undercutting me on the price of sticky tape as well.
05:08Oh, you must feel very nervous.
05:10Oh, not at all.
05:11We may cope with a raft of superior stationery.
05:14I meant Roy.
05:15I...
05:16Somewhat.
05:17Er...
05:18Blind dates are tricky.
05:20Well, it's not as if he doesn't know her.
05:22I mean, all that correspondence that's passed between them,
05:25it's extremely romantic.
05:27Have, er...
05:28Have you sent each other pictures?
05:31As in, see what you're gonna get.
05:33Of course they haven't.
05:35Roy would consider that vulgar and imagine Alice would too.
05:38We are pen pals attending a convention.
05:41I'm sure it will all be perfectly civilised.
05:44Yeah.
05:45Are you gonna make a move on her?
05:46Brian!
05:47Well, if the opportunity presents itself, an arm around the shoulder, a peck on a blusher cheek...
05:51Well, she might not use blusher.
05:53If she's made the effort, you'll know it's on.
05:57Lipstick, eye shadow...
05:59Not every woman feels the need to disguise herself.
06:03The plainer her appearance, the more confident she'll be in your company.
06:07Make-up is a tell.
06:08Au natural is a tell.
06:10Oh, scrubbed clean like a farmer's wife.
06:13Gussied up like she's standing at the docks at Marseille.
06:16That's not what I was suggesting.
06:18I am merely championing the cause of restraint.
06:21You don't have to tell him that.
06:23His middle name is restraint.
06:25Well, let's hope it's reflected in his soulmate.
06:28I think we might be overestimating the significance of the preliminary encounter.
06:33Rendezvous.
06:34Dalliance.
06:35Meet cute.
06:36They've already met.
06:37Writing is a meeting.
06:38Oh, it is of sorts.
06:39IRL.
06:40What?
06:41In real life.
06:42Writing is real life.
06:43Texting is real life.
06:44No.
06:45Alice Cropper.
06:46Doesn't that sound fabulous?
06:48Oh, she's not bound for the West End.
06:51She's going to a bat forum at the Rotary Club on Ferry Lane.
06:55Oh, now.
06:57Is there anything else I can get you raw?
06:59PHONE RINGS
07:01Old Driscoll?
07:02I thought I'd left it on the bus.
07:05No, I'd left it at the Inners.
07:07I told her it was Daniel's.
07:08Do not acquire it for a while.
07:10Oh, Roy!
07:11Roy Sturton!
07:12Roy Cropper!
07:13Hello.
07:14And what have you come in for today?
07:15Bread?
07:16Milk?
07:17Champagne?
07:18Travel sweets.
07:19Oh!
07:20The kind that Brian stocks.
07:21Do you know, Ken Bartlow bought three tins the other day.
07:25Apparently, Steve's girlfriend is addicted.
07:26Oh, what is she called?
07:27Tyrone's mum.
07:28Cassie.
07:29Ding, ding, ding.
07:30We have a winner.
07:31Are you alright?
07:32No.
07:33I need to choke my levels.
07:34I think I'm hypo.
07:35I need my insulin.
07:36Oh.
07:37Oh.
07:38Oh.
07:39Oh, what is she called?
07:40Tyrone's mum.
07:41Cassie.
07:42Ding, ding, ding.
07:43We have a winner.
07:44Are you alright?
07:45No.
07:46I need to choke my levels.
07:47I think I'm hypo.
07:48Hypo.
07:49I need my insulin.
07:50Oh.
07:51Oh.
07:52Oh.
07:53Oh.
07:54Oh.
07:55Oh.
07:56Oh.
07:57Oh.
07:58Oh.
07:59Oh.
08:00Oh.
08:01Oh.
08:02Oh.
08:03Oh.
08:04Oh.
08:05Oh.
08:06Oh.
08:07Oh.
08:08Oh.
08:09Oh.
08:10Oh.
08:11Oh.
08:12Oh.
08:13Oh, well, er, what do you want?
08:14I'm gonna go run him.
08:16What?
08:17Whose jacket is that?
08:20Mine.
08:21Why?
08:22Miss Walsh said it was Miss Rosborne's this morning.
08:25Well, yeah, but I was out training and she was cold, so she borrowed it.
08:29she borrowed it what then lied i don't know maybe she thought it was daniels or i mean mr osborne's
08:34or maybe she just forgot are you and miss walsh having an inappropriate relationship
08:39you sound you sound like you're about 60 what does that even mean a sexual relationship between an
08:45adult and a minor a minor a minor you know someone under the age of consent okay right well first of
08:50all i'm 16 and second of all you think i'd have a chance for miss walsh she's absolutely roasting
08:55and don't i like you don't agree with me you really think she'd go out with me i never said
08:58you guys were going out with each other how long has she been coaching you okay right you're starting
09:02to get on my nerves now i can help you know you better not mention this to anyone mention what
09:07this silly idea i'm just trying to be your friend yeah well i'm all good for nerd little weirdos
09:12thanks but it's illegal i can tell a teacher tell a teacher what like she's praying on you
09:19and maybe she prayed on the other kid too you're not telling any teachers this in fact you're not
09:23telling anyone this understood
09:36you will get through this because well people do perhaps counselling would help
09:50i don't want to talk about it well i know it's very difficult but alcohol may not be the answer
09:59i'll tell that to nina dragging me out yesterday there were plenty of other things that you and nina
10:07could have done the people's history museum john rylance library the museum of science and industry
10:14yeah because i'd go and look at some old cogs and pistons and then everything will be okay
10:23nina was in your shoes
10:27i know you i'm sorry i didn't mean to be facetious look roy you must have things to do
10:36no we'll sit here as long as you like ladies carl what's the capital of slovenia uh lubliana
10:50suits you what does the apron the grease the air a panic i'm not in a panic can you spell it yeah
10:59well steve mcdonald said you burnt his toast so what can i get you whatever's good
11:07is this supposed to be like banter or something she's got your number she has my number and she
11:14texted it at one in the morning maybe i should read it out loud make these three blush or maybe you
11:20should go somewhere else what did happy say then i've had my filial type homewreckers with the
11:29sideline and two-timing although he's cute that bloke at number three and we'll give you that
11:33maybe i'll get my big water somewhere else oh is she not a fancy a second date
11:39thanks for the intel
11:47spoken to roy what a snitch how many you had
11:52two three four but i've put the money in the tail look you can check go home
12:03no don't fire me you're not ready yet i don't need time off i'm an old pro at this
12:11at least i've run out of people i can lose now apart from todd
12:15and maybe i'll put a curse on them all maybe i've hexed them without knowing it look i'm not firing you
12:22i want you to agree for as long as you need and then come back i can but when you are ready
12:25i don't like grieving
12:32will you give that to bernie
12:36are you sure something right
12:39thank you she'll appreciate that i don't think she's coping very well no i want to work then i'm
12:44saying no because of a few little cocktails go home please okay before anybody else comes in and
12:51sees you like this this is too late for that sally's been in i'm fizz word will spread the devil i was
12:58drinking on the job first his own daughter and now me so i'm being nice to you you're not though are you
13:05you're saying go home stare at the ceiling i just want things to be normal dev
13:14but why didn't you tell me he was there when the hand gave you my jacket i didn't think well now
13:19he knows you lied well we've covered our tracks they're not going to find anything incriminating
13:28unless they check the cctv at various hotels in very muchdale
13:34what if sam tells leanne he won't talk to him and say what i don't know sound him out
13:41we need to shut this down shall we do the quiz what just the two of us sport packaging
13:49fast food could do without joseph or kit he's good with cock programs and true crime he knows who
13:55jack the ripper is we're spitting some here i promise i won't tell no way oh that looks very
14:02secretive no are we quizzing uh we're considering it aren't we just the two of you i might text gary
14:09the trophy's as good as yours you'll have to rearrange i assume you told her of course he told
14:17her and she'll be all the more happy when she finally makes his acquaintance he's made her
14:22acquaintance in person oh not this again you'll have to send her some flowers no doubt in for business
14:28that would be a thoughtful gesture travel suites are a thoughtful gesture except you lack the foresight to
14:35restock them a consignment is on its way she'll think you're hard to get and that's what plays
14:43very well with us women folk you know us local business leaders should stick together business
14:52leaders i like that well that's if you even have a business after leanne battered's piece finished
14:59rearranging the pieces on the checkerboard sorry now i can see she hasn't put you in the picture
15:05now why does that not surprise me about what didn't she just offer to buy me out of my own pub
15:13and with what money i hear you ask she offered to buy into the rovers i can see i've spoken out of turn
15:21and when did she make you this offer all the sisters hatching their little schemes behind our backs
15:28around their cauldron and what did you say to her very rarely do i use curse words i leave it at that
15:37the shower shower's powerful innit
15:52oh it's a belter so can you use this room anytime you like then kind of but don't be broadcasting it
16:00what's this gibberish you're reading you mean it's a german oh that's german and you understand it
16:16uh yeah yeah i do
16:18so did you enjoy my little performance earlier which one the one in the cafe
16:33what do you think why don't we'll sit it in well i won't get the third degree of my sister this way
16:42and it keeps your ex off our case anyway isn't this your speciality keeping things under wraps
16:52and we can have a lot more fun this way too
16:53hey what's up with you nothing well summit's up i'm not that daft i know that look used to catch it
17:10on size face all the time and it always meant that he was bottling something up you're not being bullied
17:16are you sure okay well listen you do know that you can talk to me about anything don't you
17:28and when i say anything i mean anything
17:32and if you don't want to talk to me then you can always talk to your dad
17:36what are you or a teacher or even a policeman come to that
17:42right i'll uh i'll go and get you some asamosas we make loads today leanne can i have a word
17:52oh i hope what have i done now
18:03cast of bed her work here and still one is waiting to be served
18:06oh i heard that ladies and gentlemen you know the drill no phones on the table or underneath it
18:16no calling a relative a friend or an enemy and no bringing your phone into the bathroom and remember
18:25there is a prize for best team name got it loud and clear i'm nervous
18:31yes no it's just that you made the right call there'll be another date with alice i'm sure
18:39then you'll be in wonderland perhaps perhaps not question one the cardboard box was invented
18:49by english company m treverton and son in the 19th century but in which decade
18:57please don't use this we're in when was it kirk
19:05question two swathbird i didn't go behind your back i was just sounding her out that's all and
19:12if she'd said yes well then obviously i would have spoken to you and we would have come to some
19:16arrangement what sort of arrangement i'm not saying i would have gone through with it you would have
19:21been gone like a shot to run that pub with your sister whoosh oh alia come on it's not that
19:26simple and if i had gone down that path then obviously i would have given you first dibs i
19:30thought i found someone i could trust yeah well i tell you someone you can't trust that duplicitous
19:35hag on the corner i'm not sure she's the duplicitous one all right look i sounded her out she said no
19:40end of story there was no need to trouble you with this news and she knows that yeah well i'd rather
19:44people were just straight with me in the first place have i ever caused you any bother have i since
19:48i was first with your dad have i ever been anything but decent to you yeah exactly and all she's done
19:54since the minute she got here he stirred the pot you ask glenda or sean or my sister yeah i know
19:59she can be tricky okay i'm not saying i couldn't have gone about things a bit differently and for
20:05what it's worth i'm sorry but come on alia this is me you're talking to i wasn't about to leave you
20:10high and dry promise yeah i promise hi sam so are you playing rugby this afternoon prop a little fly
20:21half in the making aren't you i am i hear you've been having some funny thoughts about me boring a jacket
20:39this is a bit awkward isn't it there i said i tell you what let me uh let me treat you like an equal for
20:44a moment some boys get crushes on me some of those crushes are bigger than others he told you i beg your
20:59pardon
21:04i am i miss coach i've known him for years so we had a laugh about it
21:13but if anyone really thought there was something going on then it wouldn't be very funny would it
21:20do you understand
21:32do you understand
21:35yeah
21:36do you understand
21:53do you understand
21:55and
21:55and
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