00:00We were getting married in June, and we were like, it's Pride Month.
00:04It was also the month when, you know, we talked about a legalized marriage.
00:08And so we're like, we have to celebrate Pride and celebrate us and have Pride in us.
00:13So it was just like a whole theme.
00:18We met through mutual friends.
00:20One of my best friends and one of her best friends were trying to set us up, apparently, for years.
00:26But we like to contest that.
00:28And so we actually met at a mutual friend's birthday dinner.
00:33Yes.
00:34Right?
00:34And during the dinner, our friends had us sit next to each other, and they wanted us to get to know each other.
00:40But the whole dinner, we didn't say anything to each other except, how's your dinner?
00:45I was total friends with Suli's roommate at the time.
00:49So I gave him my business card.
00:50I was like, let's keep in touch.
00:51Let's hang out.
00:52And then my friend encouraged me to give Suli my business card as well.
00:56And then from there, we actually started talking more and then went out on our first date.
01:01The second date, I was already sold because she picked, I'm a foodie, so is she, and she picked a Cuban restaurant.
01:09We're both coming off of like old relationships, old experiences, like whatever we're doing the first couple of dates is really all of that baggage that we're carrying with us.
01:18So I think by us just like saying, hey, what's up, like are you into me, are you not, really just helped us like just relax a little bit and just have fun and like really enjoy each other's company.
01:29And yeah, we are foodies and with food and drinks, like you can't go wrong with that.
01:32The kicker of the second date was when we were done, Suli asked me, she was like, so do you want to like go for a walk or do you want to like come back to my house?
01:41And I was like, oh, I'll come back to your house.
01:43And that's when I knew that, okay, we're going to, you know, we're going to like see what happens here because I'm actually interested in continuing to get to learn and know her more.
01:52We lived in the same area, so it wasn't far.
01:54We had mutual friends.
01:55I felt comfortable.
01:56I actually didn't, crazy because I'm actually someone who like is very cautious and I would never go to someone's home.
02:03But I felt comfortable with her.
02:06I learned that whenever she orders water from any restaurant, she needs to ask for lemon in the water.
02:11So when she got to my house, I brought her water with lemon.
02:15Luckily, I had lemon in the house because if I didn't have lemon, I would feel some type of way.
02:18But I had lemon and I put lemon in the water and she's like, oh, that was a sweet gesture.
02:23So I feel like she was noticing that I was paying attention to the details.
02:26Yeah, she checked the box.
02:29We've been together for nine years before we even decided to propose.
02:33And I think because once you're in sync for nine years, you kind of get a sense of like, I think this is the next step.
02:40We did a lot of different milestones in between, such as like domestic partnerships and moving in together and all these little like stepping stones for our relationship.
02:49And we kind of left it up to each other who would propose first because we're in an interesting, we're in a different situation, right?
02:54We're not in that heteronormative situation where it's like the guy's supposed to propose, right?
02:58So it's like, who gets to do that?
03:00We get to decide.
03:01So it was like, oh, maybe I can do it first and surprise her because no one's ever done that, right?
03:06Like you've never, we've never been proposed to.
03:08So that was my idea.
03:10I wanted to do it first to kind of give her that experience.
03:13But then she ended up beating me to it because we're just very in sync.
03:17And we knew that because this was a decade of us being together, March is a very significant month.
03:22That's when we met.
03:23So we were like, oh, of course March would be the month that we would both propose.
03:27And then it just turned out that she did it on the 7th.
03:30I had already planned for the 13th.
03:32And we had the same group of people involved because it was just like close family and friends.
03:36And both of them held a surprise for us, which is weird and crazy that they never said anything.
03:43The whole concept of marriage in the United States can have, we can have a whole discussion on that, right?
03:50But thinking about the history of, you know, LGBTQ queer communities across the nation, across the world,
03:58like fighting for those rights for marriage, just to be able to have that equality, you know,
04:04like just to be able to be seen the same, I think Ayanna and I want to start a family.
04:08Like the idea that either one of us would be denied rights over our children or even like if God forbid something happens to us in the hospital
04:16because we're not legally married, it's just absurd, right?
04:19And so like people fought so hard to get this, you know, legalized, not only just in the state of New York, but like federally.
04:26And then even now, like a lot of like fights are just to help maintain that.
04:29So for us, we sat hard about whether or not we really wanted to get married, right?
04:35And ultimately the answer was yes.
04:37And it was yes for so many reasons.
04:39The first reason was one, you know, we stand on the shoulders of everyone who fought for this.
04:43And like we are two people who are truly manly in love with each other.
04:47And we should be able to have that same equality and equity in the way that we live our lives.
04:52And then two is like we really wanted to celebrate our love in a deeper and real way,
04:56not just for us, but for our family and friends who I feel like they are our cheerleaders and they love us and we love love and we love them.
05:05And also it was like, you know, it was just something that told us like this is the next step.
05:10It felt right for us as a couple, but it also felt right for us as a movement.
05:15If I know that I'm in love with someone to this extent, why not show that to the world?
05:20Why not share our story and why not just have something that means something to us that we can keep and we can have?
05:27Like this is something that's sacred to us.
05:29And the fact that we're able to do that, I think it's just really important.
05:33You know, if we have kids or when we have kids, you know, who knows what will happen with them.
05:37But to be able to just be like, this is your story.
05:40You get to control your own narrative.
05:41You get to love who you want to love.
05:43You get to celebrate that in any way you want.
05:45I think it's amazing.
05:46We knew we didn't want a long engagement normally, naturally.
05:50And I think because of what we were all experiencing in the pandemic and obviously all of us experiencing loss and grief and just uncertainty that we were like, oh, we have to do this.
06:00And we're going to plan this like at least within the year, like we're going to get married or however that looks like.
06:11We knew what we were wearing.
06:13So we wanted both of our outfits to complement each other, but still really represent us.
06:17I love a pantsuit, a jumpsuit, but I didn't just want a regular pantsuit because my family and friends, they always see me in like a jumpsuit.
06:25Right.
06:26And I'm like, I wanted something different.
06:27So I realized that I wanted a jumpsuit was like a dramatic effect.
06:32Now we were like going through a lot of different like websites, but I finally ended on ASOS Bridal.
06:36Now, I didn't even know that ASOS, the UK like shop, actually had a bridal department and a bridal section.
06:43And when that one arrived and I put it on, I was like, yes, this is it.
06:47I love the sleeves.
06:49Like my back was out.
06:51It really made me feel like tall and beautiful.
06:54My dress was such a thing.
06:57Like, what do you wear to a park wedding?
07:00That was literally the question I kept asking.
07:02What do you wear?
07:02I don't want things dragging on the floor.
07:04No one's trying to clean that.
07:05Like I was just really trying to figure it out.
07:08So I randomly one day was telling Suli, I was like, you know, I'm just going to like, just book a sample sale appointment and see what they have.
07:15And I think I tried on like five or six.
07:17And the first, first dress I tried on, I instantly fell in love with.
07:20But because we're so not traditional, Suli came with me when I tried on my dress.
07:25And when she saw it, she was like, this is the dress.
07:29I had them put like strings to kind of cinch it.
07:31That also added to the pricing.
07:33But when it was done, it felt really beautiful.
07:38And it felt like me.
07:39And the kicker of it all was it was a one-of-a-kind dress.
07:43We're about to do this.
07:45It's been a while.
07:47But we're here with our family and friends.
07:49And it is the most amazing journey.
07:52And I can't wait for a decade more.
07:54Salud.
07:54We were able to really kind of create a magical experience with a small number of people in person.
08:02Having people on Zoom was really effective for us as well.
08:06And just still getting kind of like that vibe we wanted.
08:09So to kind of like top off the whole like wedding experience, we were struggling as well with like catering.
08:15And like do we do a restaurant or what do we do?
08:17And then we ended up just like reaching out to Celestine's in Brooklyn.
08:21And they were able to really like shut down the restaurant for us.
08:24And gave us a beautiful outside patio experience where we were able to do like a really cute brunch with our intimate 25 people.
08:32And it just really made things just so memorable for us.
08:37It wasn't the experience that we thought we wanted.
08:39But it was definitely the experience we needed.
08:42People just felt our love.
08:44And just the little details were really important to us.
08:47I'm really big on themes and colors.
08:49And in my past life as a fashion stylist.
08:51And so everyone had to come color coordinated in person.
08:55Even the officiant.
08:56We had like special things at like the reception like personal cocktails with our names.
09:02Just like little things to make things feel really special.
09:04Everything felt really authentic and sweet.
09:08Right?
09:08And just us.
09:09Just us.
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