00:00We can often believe that we are trapped by our history, our genetics, our personal story.
00:08And feeling trapped like that, when it becomes overwhelming, is something that becomes subconscious.
00:14So when dealing with learned helplessness, we should all be open to understanding
00:19and asking the questions of whether we suffer with the syndrome as well.
00:25It's like being in a car where a ghost is driving.
00:29And that ghost has all your history, all your problems, making you feel what we call powerless to make change.
00:38And one of the worst feelings of all is when we are believing the story that we are powerless
00:46to take agency to make change happen for ourselves.
00:49And that feeling is a feeling of feeling trapped, of not being able to grow, to connect, to make positive changes in your life.
01:04And that feeling most people at our Center for Healing have described as one of the worst feelings that they have ever experienced.
01:12But that feeling is not the truth.
01:15You see, everyone has personal agency to be able to create discipline, to create routines, to create structure,
01:24to dream and imagine something better for yourself.
01:28But when we feel that we're helpless, we become, of course, a victim.
01:35And feeling like a victim is rough in itself.
01:38It doesn't really help anybody.
01:39And that feeling like a victim over five years and ten years, especially when we're small and when we're growing up,
01:46is something that can really overwhelm.
01:50And when that happens, we put on masks and we say, right, let's bury the truth.
01:55We're tired of making lists.
01:57We're tired of trying to create goals and objectives for ourselves.
02:03You know, we've done it all.
02:04We've failed so many times.
02:05It's just never worked and it's not going to work again.
02:09The conscious becomes unconscious thought and we can then suffer learned helplessness.
02:15Now, learned helplessness is actually something that's really, really hurt people deeply.
02:23Because when that belief comes, getting rid of it and understanding that you have personal power, authentic power,
02:32that you have the agency.
02:35That's a very important word we'll discuss through this, is that when you have that agency
02:40and you start to reimagine and realize, you begin to understand that your thinking is black and white.
02:50Your thinking is dualistic.
02:54It's laced in what we call splitting.
02:57So understanding that learned helplessness starts with an awareness is the very first step here.
03:04So there's a particular cruelty to suffering learned helplessness.
03:10You know, it takes us on this cognitive journey where we start thinking.
03:15And of course, when you think over and over again, it becomes a belief.
03:18And we start actually believing that there is nothing we can do about a situation.
03:24And of course, that feeling is hopelessness.
03:27Now, when we experience setbacks through life repeatedly, our brain is hardwired for a two-letter word, no.
03:36Everything becomes no.
03:38You know, I can't is a prison.
03:41And that prison becomes very, very real when we suffer over and over again.
03:45It's like a complex trauma of not being able to break free and create the life you want for yourself.
03:52So we're all open to learned helplessness and its symptoms and consequences.
03:59So once we become aware, we can disrupt the default mode that our mind is on.
04:06Everything is no.
04:07I'm not going to be able to achieve this or do this.
04:10I'm not even going to try.
04:12Is black and white thinking?
04:14Will it work?
04:15No.
04:15Yes or no.
04:16There's a ton of life and opportunity in between a yes and a no.
04:21So number one, open your mind, make the circle bigger, think outside the box and especially question your thoughts.
04:32Is it really true that I can't?
04:36Then you develop agency.
04:39Now, agency is what we spoke about a little earlier.
04:41And all that is, is knowing that you have the internal values, power and capability to create through a process.
04:52It's not going to be easy, but it will be worth it.
04:55Create through a process something beautiful or wonderful for yourself.
04:59So we question the thoughts.
05:02We then realize we have false beliefs and we realize that we are not helpless.
05:08We're divine human beings.
05:11And of course, we've got a 10 step paradigm shift process, which takes us from learned helpless to authentic agency and power.
05:20So number one, what we do is we identify the limiting pattern nice and easy.
05:26Then we locate the original imprint and look back, trace back your symptoms to your source.
05:33Three, we acknowledge the protective function that it served and it did us well for a while.
05:39And then it smothered us and kept us back.
05:42So that's a survival strategy of the mind.
05:44Fourth, we assess current reality.
05:48Come into the present moment.
05:51Does your helplessness still exist?
05:53Probably not.
05:55We then challenge the paradigm right in the middle at step five.
06:00Identify alternative responses.
06:04Release the old story at number seven.
06:06Embody the new paradigm.
06:08Now that we're aware, we can break free.
06:11Embody and each action that contradicts learned helplessness quickly rewrites the script.
06:18Your nervous system itself begins to encode new data.
06:22So at step nine, we integrate through repetition and practice.
06:28You're not just going to pick up an electric guitar and play Stairway to Heaven straight through.
06:33You're going to need to realize it is a process.
06:37We start self-reinforcing and every little success makes the next attempt more accessible.
06:45And then tenth, anchor in present awareness.
06:50Don't let the mind keep you in the past.
06:53That makes you depressed.
06:55Don't let the mind take you towards being worried about the future.
06:59That creates anxiety.
07:00So with that new awareness, develop agency, accept the problem, and take new action to change everything around.
07:12It's a process, but it's definitely worth it.
07:15And, you know, the biggest problem, we can't reiterate enough, whether it's learned helplessness, whether it's depression, anxiety,
07:23it's unconscious patterns that we need to become aware of through talk therapy, through meditation, you know,
07:32getting into the stillness, into presence, and getting into the gap.
07:37And in that space, we can change absolutely everything.
07:41Each and every one of us are capable of growth and contribution at the highest level.
07:53Each and every one of us are capable of growth and contribution to our culture and contribution to each other.
07:55Each and every one of us are capable of growth and contribution to each other.
Comments