- 7 hours ago
A conversation on taking the best care during a woman's most vulnerable and awesome state: Pregnancy. These mothers working in the birth industry share details from wellness to advocacy
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00:00Hey, Essence Festival of Culture, how y'all doing?
00:11Woo!
00:12I'm going to add to that, I'm going to add to that.
00:13I'm Corey Murray, Deputy Editor of Essence Magazine,
00:16and I am excited to talk with these beautiful women up here on this stage.
00:21I'm going to talk about something very important,
00:23beauty bare belly, how to take care of pregnancy skin.
00:27I wish I knew y'all when I was pregnant, because we're going to talk about it.
00:32We're going to talk about it.
00:34Please introduce yourself, because they're too beautiful for me to say their names.
00:38Please tell me what you do.
00:39Hello, my name is Rachel Nix.
00:41I am a mother of two beautiful black sons,
00:43a founder of Birth Queen, a new nonprofit combating the black maternal health crisis,
00:48also a doula, lactation counselor, actor, and mirror instructor.
00:54I like to be bored.
00:55You said mirror instructor?
00:57Yeah, I'm a fitness trainer for mirrors, and you're a little fancy, like mirror in your house.
01:01Yes, yes.
01:02I can come visit you.
01:06Okay, well, hello, everybody.
01:08My name is Melissa Odom, and I am a Louisiana leading licensed esthetician.
01:13The name of my company is Queendom Aesthetics Natural Skin Care Company.
01:16I own the number one black-owned wellness spa in the state of Louisiana.
01:20And it's a pleasure to be here.
01:24I love skin, all things skin, and wellness and holistic, so it's a pleasure.
01:29Hi, I'm Shatamia Webb.
01:31I'm a midwife.
01:32I am from Lafayette, Louisiana, and I just recently opened the first freestanding black-owned birth
01:37center in Louisiana.
01:39Yes!
01:41Oh, my God.
01:44Oh, my God.
01:47So this is going to be a really powerful panel, because we cannot talk about black women in
01:52motherhood without having an honest conversation.
01:55So, Rachel, we're going to start with you.
01:57So, Birth Queen, how are you helping women recover from the changes in their skin caused by pregnancy?
02:03So, Birth Queen is a non-profit that I founded to just really provide resources and means
02:10for black mothers, as well as black birth workers, to make sure there are more Shatamias and birth
02:16sinners in the world serving us, or in the country, and beyond.
02:20But I think as far as our skin, it's important to make sure you have everything.
02:27So, beyond having birth workers for our mothers with the non-profit, we're having and providing
02:33a gold package of love.
02:35So, within it, the mothers receive pre- and postnatal essentials, which also will include,
02:41you know, an oil or whatever for their bellies, and an entire body.
02:45I know when I was pregnant, I lathered, and you can really speak to this, is like, we don't
02:50really realize, like, how important skin is from head to toe.
02:54And I think sometimes we just focus on our faces, or our feet, or elbows, and knees.
03:00But the belly and the booty goes through a lot during- and the boobies through pregnancy,
03:05and they need love, too.
03:07So, making sure that they stay hydrated from the inside out.
03:11And that's- I know you can speak to how important it is to hydrate as well for the skin.
03:16Melissa, can you speak to that?
03:17What are these changes that come through in pregnancy?
03:20Because I will confess, I forgot what month I was, my skin got so- no, it was right after
03:26I had my daughter, my skin got so dry, I remember slathering Vaseline on my face, but then in
03:35an hour, it was all gone.
03:37Like, it's still- my face was still so dry, but what kind of changes?
03:40Okay, well, for myself, I am a mother of four children.
03:43So, the transition with the body and what it's done and what it hasn't done during pregnancy
03:49was a lot.
03:49For me, I always say hydration, because a lot of people don't realize that the outermost
03:55layer of your skin doesn't retain moisture unless you hydrate your body.
04:00And so, a lot of times, as pregnant women, we want to eat, eat, eat, eat, eat.
04:04We may have this obsession for drinking a particular drink, you know, like that pregnancy craving
04:09type of thing, but I don't think that we consider drinking a lot of water, unless you're
04:15pregnant in the summer.
04:15It's summertime, it's like, okay, I'm thirsty, I need some water, but that's about the only
04:21time.
04:21And so, winter time is really one of the hardest times to maintain hydration and moisture in
04:26your skin while you're pregnant, because, I mean, you don't have a need for water in
04:31fall and winter months.
04:33Like, mentally, you don't, but we don't realize that.
04:35We need to stay hydrated, we need to stay moisturized, and drinking a lot of water is of
04:40importance, for sure.
04:41So, Timmy, I'm sorry, Shatimia, how is it, how, what kind of changes have you seen in
04:48your practice with women in pregnancy and their skin?
04:51I've gone through it recently.
04:53I have a seven-year-old and a three-month-old, so this is all pretty new to me all over.
04:58Thank you, again.
04:59So, again, I preach the hydration with my clients and water and making sure they're getting
05:04enough water, because sometimes your hormones are just all out of whack in pregnancy.
05:08So, hydrating is the number one thing that you should do throughout your pregnancy.
05:13And what about postpartum?
05:15Postpartum also, especially if you're breastfeeding.
05:18It feels like they're just sucking the life out of you, so you need extra water when you're
05:24breastfeeding, especially.
05:25And did you all have issues with your skin during pregnancy and post?
05:30I had the discoloration in my skin around my boob area, the belly, so, yeah, I did.
05:37Yeah, a lot of women develop what they call pregnancy masks.
05:41Yes.
05:41Oh, yes.
05:41Yeah, so where they find discoloration in certain areas of the body that we normally just,
05:46you know, may not have during any other time in our lives.
05:49Kind of getting that darkness around your neck area, between your legs, a lot of, that's
05:54a conversation that needs to be had and how to maintain and hydrate that and treat it during
05:58that time.
06:00But for the most part, I've seen a lot of pregnancy masks within my clients.
06:04And after pregnancy, sometimes post-skincare, we still see that issue and it takes a lot
06:10of treatment, a lot of hydration, a lot of different, you know, rich oils to help, you
06:15know, soothe and get that pigmentation back to where it originally was.
06:19What about you, Rachel?
06:20I would say with my first son, I had more, like, breakouts.
06:25I have a three and a half and an eight-month-old.
06:28And with the last one, I was very happy with my skin.
06:32I had some, like, chest acne for, like, maybe a couple months in my second trimester.
06:37But I was good.
06:38But I took, I prioritized my skin care regime.
06:43And it was COVID.
06:44So I wasn't working as much.
06:46And so I made sure, like, I hydrated.
06:48I did my masks.
06:49I had my, like, self-care routine.
06:52And I was much more committed to it with the second baby.
06:56And I think it really paid off.
06:58We're talking a lot about water.
06:59But is there any other particular foods that would help or vitamins that help with hydration?
07:04Any fruit that is high in water, like watermelon, cantaloupe, any fruits will help.
07:11Smart water with electrolytes, that'll help.
07:14But mostly fruits, watermelon, especially in the summertime, it'll help.
07:19Okay.
07:20I'm a big coconut water fan, especially during your labor, to keep you energized, right?
07:28Electrolytes are really important, and it's hard to get.
07:31Like, sometimes you feel like you're drinking so much water during pregnancy, and you still feel dehydrated or thirsty or whatever.
07:37And a lot of times I think we think we're hungry when we're actually dehydrated.
07:41And that goes for just life in general.
07:44But it is important, and I think sometimes it's hard to do even postpartum because all of a sudden you have a little person or multiple little people that you're looking after,
07:53and you have to make sure you prioritize yourself.
07:55And even with just eating, I mean, you're in the thick of it.
08:00But, you know, even with, you know, my two littles at home, it's like, wait, did I eat today?
08:06Because you're so hyper-focused on making sure they hydrate and they have their million meals and snacks a day.
08:13But you have to make sure you do that for yourself as well.
08:16And I don't know about y'all.
08:17I find myself, whatever she didn't eat, I was just picking up.
08:21So I'm eating pizza, chicken fingers, and fries.
08:24That's my meal all day.
08:25And they don't have to have chicken fingers and pizza.
08:28That's true.
08:29They can eat zucchini and other things.
08:32And pizza, too.
08:34But, yeah, I think if it's like that in my house, I'm not a short-order cook.
08:38So it's like, this is dinner.
08:41This is breakfast.
08:42This is lunch.
08:47Melissa, I want to shift a bit.
08:48So what inspired you to launch Queendom Aesthetic?
08:52Okay.
08:53So funny story, Queendom Aesthetic was not a business.
08:56It was more or less a hobby.
08:58And the original name of my business was Real Black Beauties.
09:03And when I went to school to become an esthetician,
09:05I find myself kind of getting out of this box of,
09:08so my name was, they called me Black Beauty.
09:11So naturally, I wanted to name my business Real Black Beauty.
09:14This is me type of thing.
09:15And I wasn't intentional with the name.
09:17And so while I was in school, I kind of discovered,
09:21I stepped into my femininity.
09:23And I was like, you know what?
09:25When I transition into a true business,
09:28I want a place where women can come and congregate
09:30and feel confident and liberated.
09:32And so when we think about, like, hey, the household,
09:34it's like, oh, the kingdom.
09:36But I'm like, wait, what about something for women?
09:39Where can we come and feel beautiful and feel housed?
09:42And so I came up with Queendom Aesthetics.
09:45And it was just like a random moment.
09:46I was like, Queendom Aesthetics?
09:48And I'm going to have a spa, and I'm going to start my skincare.
09:51And it kind of went hand in hand.
09:56Shatima, can you tell me what inspired you
09:59to make midwifery a business for you?
10:03I always wanted to be in the business of babies.
10:06I went to school.
10:07I thought about going to medical school.
10:09But once I finished undergrad, I was like,
10:11I don't want to go to school anymore.
10:13I found out about a midwifery program,
10:15ends up going back to school anyway,
10:17and it became a midwife.
10:19I've been mostly doing home births,
10:21traveling all over the place.
10:23And that was a lot of wear and tear.
10:26So I decided to open up a birth center,
10:28and it should be open at the end of July.
10:31Wow.
10:32What has been the beauty of what you do?
10:36Getting to see, especially these first-time parents,
10:39welcome their babies into the world.
10:41And if dad cries, I'm crying just along with them.
10:46Takes you out.
10:47Yes, it does.
10:48But just giving them more options
10:50and letting them know that they have other options.
10:53They have a voice.
10:54They can choose the birth that they want
10:56as long as everything goes according to
10:57and they're safe in their pregnancy,
11:00then they can have the birth of their dream.
11:03Yeah.
11:04I think a lot about the myths around having a midwife
11:08because a lot of people think,
11:09oh, you want to be safe in a hospital,
11:10all these things.
11:11But I know quite a few women who have chosen midwives.
11:16What do you say to people who doubt going this way?
11:19I would say that I'm not just a side-of-the-road midwife.
11:23I don't come with just a bag in boiling water.
11:26I am licensed with the state,
11:28the same board that the doctors are licensed with.
11:32I am certified nationally.
11:34So we go through a lot of training.
11:36I trained for five years before I got my license.
11:39So it was a lot.
11:40I had to have so many births
11:41before I became a licensed midwife.
11:44So I would just say reach out to,
11:48there are multiple midwives in Louisiana.
11:50Reach out, find the right match for you.
11:52And yeah, just go from there.
11:54Like you have options.
11:56And knowing the history.
11:59Okay?
12:00Yeah.
12:00So I'm going to keep it 100.
12:02White men created obstetrics.
12:05Death goes hand in hand with their lack of understanding
12:08and adoption of the traditions of African midwives.
12:12Black women birth babies.
12:14We kept women alive.
12:15We kept our babies alive.
12:17We birthed them.
12:18We fed them.
12:18We clothed them.
12:20They were,
12:20our babies were ripped from our chest
12:22so we could nurse their babies.
12:23We now have low black breastfeeding rates
12:26as a result of that.
12:27We are dying at five to 12 times the rate in New York City.
12:3212 times the rate in New York City.
12:35You know,
12:35this is because they didn't trust
12:37and adopt our practices and keep us safe.
12:40And then, you know,
12:41in the state of Alabama,
12:42you have some of the most famous midwives who,
12:44and now there's no,
12:45like no black midwives in Alabama.
12:48I just was talking to Dr. Stephanie Mitchell,
12:50who's opening her birth sanctuary any day now.
12:53And it's just insane.
12:55So we can't believe,
12:56all this is by design.
12:57They realize that they can make a business out of birth
13:00and now we're dying as a result.
13:02We also weren't welcome into the hospital setting
13:04and now that's all we trust in is the white coat.
13:08But they don't have all the tools.
13:10I'm not demonizing OBs,
13:11but OBs don't have the toolbox that a midwife has.
13:15OBs don't have the toolbox that a doula has.
13:18OBs don't have the toolbox that a lactation counselor has.
13:21And there's medical racism.
13:23They, you know,
13:24they believe that black women don't feel pain
13:25in the same way as white women.
13:27You need to understand that
13:28when you go into a hospital setting.
13:30And if you don't feel comfortable,
13:31you have a voice and you have a right.
13:33And you cannot go into a hospital setting
13:36blindly just trusting everybody.
13:38You are the center.
13:40You are birthing this baby.
13:42You know your body.
13:43You know your baby.
13:44You need to advocate for self.
13:46And if that is not,
13:48if you're not supported in that setting,
13:50make another choice.
13:51Yeah.
13:52I'm glad you,
13:53but two questions.
13:54Can you just explain briefly
13:55the difference between a doula and a midwife?
13:58Because I think for some people,
13:59they might not know.
14:00She catches our coach.
14:01Okay.
14:05And who supported you each during your pregnancies
14:08aside from your partners?
14:10My midwife.
14:12Oh, you had a midwife too.
14:13I had a midwife too.
14:14I could not catch my own baby.
14:15I know I had the support of my kid's father
14:21during that time.
14:23And I ended up having to have a C-section
14:25because I just felt we used the epidural
14:28and all of that.
14:29I didn't really feel myself pushing.
14:31And so my kids' dad were like trying to motivate
14:34and inspire me to push,
14:35but I felt nothing.
14:36And that goes back to like the drugs
14:38and stuff like that that they put inside of us
14:40that can ultimately harm us and our babies,
14:42though they say it doesn't.
14:43But I had the support of my kid's dad at the time.
14:47So having the support of someone
14:48in that process of birthing is so important.
14:51So it definitely goes back to her catching
14:53and her coaching.
14:55Yeah.
14:56And I had hospital births with a midwife and a doula
15:00and my husband.
15:02It's interesting.
15:03When I was having my baby,
15:04I thought going into it,
15:06I was like,
15:06my mother needs to be there.
15:07My mother needs to be there.
15:08But my partner was there
15:10and he's holding my hand.
15:12He's breathing with me.
15:13He's helping me focus.
15:14And then when my mother gets there from Maryland,
15:16she comes in.
15:17She's like,
15:18Coe, how are you doing?
15:19Do you want my help?
15:20And I was like this,
15:21go get Max.
15:22Get out of here.
15:24Like I didn't realize how much I had started
15:25like fixating on him and I needed him.
15:27And I was like,
15:28it was weird because I was like,
15:30oh my God,
15:30I thought I was going to have this moment with my mother.
15:32But I was like,
15:32no,
15:32I need him.
15:33Like come in,
15:34but you know,
15:35my mother's up there.
15:35So don't feel the way mama.
15:38Well,
15:38I thought my mom,
15:39cause I was,
15:40I took a little while into this world.
15:42She was induced,
15:43but I was like a four day labor baby.
15:45Sorry,
15:45mama.
15:47And so I was like,
15:47I need you there.
15:48Cause if I see you,
15:49I know I could do this.
15:50Cause you did this without any epidural with me for four days.
15:53And then she's like,
15:54I think you just need the drugs,
15:55baby.
15:55You just get the drugs.
15:56Are you okay?
15:57She's breathing out the window.
15:58And I was like,
15:59mommy,
16:00you're supposed to be taking pictures.
16:01Then I saw the pictures of the push.
16:02And I was like,
16:03that's why she didn't want to take them pictures.
16:04She's like,
16:05I couldn't watch my baby go through that.
16:07So you have to be honest,
16:08like who is going to be your best support?
16:10And it could be your partner.
16:10It could be your mom.
16:11It could not.
16:12That's also why a doula is great because a doula can kind of like survey the
16:15scene and be like,
16:16maybe your man need to go get a cup of ice or your mama need to disappear.
16:22And they could be that person to kind of like,
16:25make sure that you're good so that you're not worrying about everybody else.
16:29And it's hard cause you start worrying about everybody else.
16:32Even,
16:32you know,
16:33as a midwife birthing,
16:34you need someone to not let you be a midwife in that moment and be a birthing
16:38mother.
16:39So it's,
16:40you need people to protect your space.
16:41And that's how it was.
16:43Women gave birth in communion with other women.
16:46And we really have gone up,
16:48gotten away from that.
16:50Let's switch a bit to postpartum because for a lot of people,
16:54it's still a taboo subject.
16:55So what resources out are out there to help black moms get the mental health
17:00support they need and deserve?
17:03I think there's a lot of like social groups for sure.
17:06Now,
17:07and social media has made it a lot easier to connect with different support
17:11groups and women who actually empathize as well as sympathize with the whole
17:16transition and the process.
17:18But I think a lot of times we need to feel comfortable with reaching out for that
17:22help and that support.
17:23Cause that's the biggest thing.
17:24We don't feel confident enough sometimes amongst other women to ask for help
17:29and support.
17:30So thank goodness for those groups.
17:31But it starts with the mindset of saying,
17:33Hey,
17:33I truly want some support cause you have to want it.
17:36Some people don't want it.
17:37Or they fear rejection in the support.
17:39So they won't ask for support.
17:42But social media has definitely make it really a lot easier to connect with other
17:46people and figure out what is happening.
17:48You don't have to hop on Google if you don't,
17:50if you don't need to.
17:51I call Instagram kind of like the black directory now.
17:55So it's like,
17:56Hey,
17:56who has a group out there?
17:58I can use the hashtag birth moms and doulas and stuff like this and find
18:01people all over the country that can lend a supporting hand for you,
18:06whether they are close or far.
18:08You make me think.
18:09So what are some signs that you may be experiencing postpartum?
18:13I would say just feeling like you can do it all by yourself.
18:22I even went through this maybe a month ago when I felt like I could go,
18:27I could do everything.
18:28I was still working,
18:29taking care of both the kids and just assuming that people know that you need
18:33help or that you have it all by yourself,
18:36but they really don't like you have to ask for the help.
18:39You can't just assume that somebody knows that you need the help without
18:42asking.
18:43You can't just go by and,
18:47Oh,
18:47I got it all.
18:48I could do it all.
18:49And then you're going to fall apart.
18:50It's going to build up on you.
18:51So you have to ask for the help.
18:53Yeah.
18:53And I think now we're getting away from just saying postpartum depression.
18:57So now we're saying more terms like PMADS with like postpartum mental
19:02anxiety disorder.
19:03So the way to break that down is cause I think when you hear depression,
19:07you think a dark room,
19:08I can't leave,
19:08I can't function.
19:10But if you have an intrusive thought that's preventing you from just getting
19:13through your day,
19:14you know then you need to say whether that's anxiety,
19:17stress,
19:18you know,
19:19negative self-talk or visualizations of injuring your child,
19:23any of that,
19:24get help,
19:25talk about it.
19:26And I think I say to piggyback more off of what you're saying is not to
19:30mother in isolation because it's dangerous.
19:35And if you have a friend that's had a baby,
19:38I've got one right now,
19:39but she's away from me.
19:40I'm in New York and she's in Atlanta and I know she's not okay.
19:43But she,
19:44you know,
19:44if you have a friend that goes ghost,
19:46she's not okay.
19:47You know,
19:48don't let her ghost you because she's struggling and it could be
19:53breastfeeding.
19:53It just could be a chemical imbalance,
19:55balancing it all bills,
19:57partner,
19:58other kids.
19:59It's a lot being black.
20:02It's a lot.
20:03So,
20:03you know,
20:03and nobody needs to do that by themselves.
20:06So make sure you take care of mommy and not just baby.
20:09You know,
20:09it's interesting when you,
20:10um,
20:11I'm not to make this a TMI moment,
20:13but I remember I was having a problem breastfeeding,
20:15but I was so embarrassed to ask for help.
20:17But it's not TMI.
20:19So this is what we have to stop.
20:21Why is that TMI that you are like,
20:23I need support breastfeeding.
20:25Have you had you breastfed before?
20:26Nope.
20:26Had you had that baby before?
20:28Nope.
20:28Had that baby breastfed before?
20:30Nope.
20:30Okay.
20:31So if you ride a bike and you fall,
20:34you like,
20:34get up,
20:34baby,
20:34get back on and let mommy help you figure out how to do this.
20:37It is the same thing.
20:39Yeah.
20:39So for us to be like,
20:40because it's natural,
20:42it should be lickety split.
20:43That is wrong.
20:44And if you're alone at your house,
20:47exhausted,
20:48you know,
20:49frustrated is you need support.
20:52That's not a bad thing.
20:53Right.
20:54So not to like,
20:56no,
20:56no,
20:56no,
20:56I'm glad you did it,
20:57but it was,
20:58but we have,
20:59I felt that way.
21:00I,
21:00I,
21:00and I also felt I'm a black mother.
21:02I should be able to figure this out,
21:05but it was a good old white nurse who said,
21:07nope,
21:07you need to put your boob in.
21:09You got to really stuck it in there.
21:10And once she told me what to do,
21:12my baby was breastfed.
21:13Yeah.
21:13That's great that you,
21:15I love the support.
21:16My,
21:16my last daughter,
21:17she's about to be seven.
21:18I breastfed her.
21:19She was the first and breastfeeding her.
21:21I was just so nervous,
21:22but her dad was just,
21:24you know,
21:24pushing me,
21:25just driving me to just really,
21:26this is the best way.
21:28And I'm like,
21:28but I don't know how.
21:30And,
21:31but I appreciate the support because I wasn't expecting someone to come in and
21:35say,
21:36okay,
21:36we have a specialist that's going to walk you through how to do this.
21:39I really thought they were going to be like,
21:40here's your baby.
21:41Go ahead on and go.
21:42And having that support was just very,
21:45it pushed me through.
21:46That's why I was able to go as long as I did with breastfeeding,
21:49just being brand new.
21:50And I was fearful,
21:52but it wound up working out and I had the support of the nurses.
21:55And I remember just calling like one of the nurses who was like a
21:58specialist in it was like,
21:59just give me a call,
22:00Melissa.
22:01Like this your real number.
22:02Cause I'm going to need your real number.
22:03And I had her real number.
22:07And it would just be times where we would be on YouTube.
22:10And my daughter's dad would say,
22:12just call the lady.
22:13I'm like,
22:13okay,
22:14it's one o'clock and I'm just trying to figure it out.
22:17I'm tired.
22:18And she's like,
22:19girl,
22:19just do this,
22:20do this,
22:20try that.
22:21And it worked.
22:22Yeah.
22:23So the support definitely made all the difference.
22:25So we don't know what we're doing.
22:27Yeah.
22:27There's the books out there,
22:28but it's like,
22:29you really don't learn nothing until you learn something.
22:31Like when you're in that,
22:32that environment,
22:34it's like,
22:34Oh,
22:35cause the books,
22:36they do this and do that.
22:37But I'm confused now.
22:39I mean,
22:39it's,
22:40it's over information.
22:42Yeah.
22:43So it's like,
22:43okay.
22:44So before we leave,
22:46if,
22:46if,
22:46if there's any pregnant women or women who aim to be pregnant,
22:50what is the one piece of advice that our new moms out there that you,
22:53you want to tell each tell,
22:55tell them one piece of advice.
22:57from each of you.
22:58For me as a licensed esthetician,
23:01I'm seeing the,
23:03the,
23:04the need for true self care amongst women and how we just really don't
23:10prioritize ourselves.
23:11And then once we get pregnant,
23:13I remember my first pregnancy,
23:14I was 16.
23:15And so it was like,
23:16life is over.
23:17It's all about the baby.
23:18And so it will continue to just be a thing where there,
23:22there will be young moms dealing with pregnancy.
23:25So I come to a space of speaking on that.
23:27And of the table,
23:28like for young moms,
23:29um,
23:30feel encouraged to like step into still self beauty and self care,
23:34even while pregnant life is not over because you're pregnant,
23:3816 and pregnant.
23:39It's like,
23:39okay,
23:39Hey,
23:40it's beginning now.
23:41So now you learn how to self care and how to feel liberated in your own skin.
23:45So when you birth this baby and raise this baby up,
23:48this child understands like,
23:49okay,
23:49I see my mama feeling and looking her best.
23:51And so now I can move forward.
23:55And you know how we,
23:56as kids,
23:56we were taught to be a lady by our grandmothers and our moms,
23:59but really kind of sit in that space and,
24:01and show it and be a good example.
24:04So for me,
24:05it's like,
24:05okay,
24:05once you find out you're pregnant,
24:07create a regimen for sure.
24:08of just like she said,
24:10with her skin,
24:10she developed something body take care of that.
24:13Not just our faces,
24:14because we do experience a lot of,
24:16um,
24:16you know,
24:16some people get acne and stuff like that,
24:18but don't disconnect from belly as well.
24:22You know,
24:23yeah,
24:23your face may be experienced and whatever,
24:25but if you don't take care of your body and get those treatments or soaking that milk bath,
24:30um,
24:30as you should from time to time to make yourself feel your best,
24:34um,
24:34ultimately you're going to probably shut down.
24:37So I said,
24:37treat yourself like a queen while you're pregnant.
24:39So when you are,
24:41you know,
24:42postpartum,
24:43it's like,
24:43okay,
24:43Hey,
24:43I feel good.
24:45Research.
24:46I would say research,
24:47everything research about breastfeeding,
24:50about labor,
24:51about,
24:52um,
24:52becoming a new parent and do your research.
24:56Don't just rely on somebody,
24:58your doctor,
24:59your midwife or anything to teach you,
25:02do the teaching yourself.
25:03Even though in my care,
25:05care,
25:06our prenatal visits are about 45 minutes long,
25:08just because we're doing a lot of educating while breastfeeding and labor and postpartum,
25:12but you need to do your own research.
25:14I can't make the decision for you with certain things.
25:17So do your research.
25:18Okay.
25:19Um,
25:19self-care is huge,
25:23prioritizing self.
25:24And I love that you have Queensom and I founded birth queen,
25:27but I think what I would leave everyone with is I founded a nonprofit with a six month old.
25:32No,
25:33he was five months.
25:33And people were like,
25:36are you crazy?
25:37But I love my black Queens.
25:39And I feel that I'm walking in my purpose to create space and protection,
25:44um,
25:45and a joy and abundance for us.
25:47And that's important.
25:48And so similar to what you're saying,
25:50don't feel like just because you're a mother,
25:52you don't have time or you're not able.
25:54I'm a better business woman as a mother than I've ever been in my whole life.
25:58I've made more money as a mother than ever.
26:01I feel sexy as shit as a mother,
26:04pregnant and postpartum,
26:05even when I got my pooch and all that stuff,
26:08like my body created life.
26:10If that is a superpower.
26:13So,
26:13so never let anyone make you feel that you're less than as a birth queen.
26:19Cause that is exactly what you are.
26:21Amen.
26:24Amen.
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