00:00Hello, beautiful people. My name is Phoebe and I want to share my breastfeeding journey with you.
00:07So I have one child, an 11-month-old daughter named Nora, and I knew before she was born that
00:13I wanted to breastfeed. I just don't think I knew how difficult it would be for me.
00:19During the entire stay in the hospital, I requested a lactation consultant and one
00:24wasn't available until about 45 minutes before I was discharged. She popped in, said,
00:32great latch mom, good luck, and walked out the door. So day one, I was kind of feeling a little
00:37defeated, you know? And even with great support from my husband and my family, it was really
00:44difficult during maternity leave. We tried everything, you know, breast shields, pumping
00:50constantly, lactation consultants coming to the house. And I also wasn't producing enough milk,
00:57so we had to supplement with formula, which broke my heart because I felt guilty that I wasn't able
01:04to do something that should have come so naturally. And unfortunately, right as we were getting into
01:10the groove and I was starting to understand how this worked, Nora was too, I had to go back to work.
01:16And we were living in New York City at the time, so affordable daycare was not as easy to come by.
01:25Yeah, so we ended up having to send my daughter to Maryland to stay with my mother. And so not only
01:33did I have to return to work without a good grasp and breastfeeding, I had to be separated from my
01:38daughter. So I would, every two weeks, take her express milk. And while I was fortunate to have a
01:45job that provided dedicated lactation rooms and hospital-grade pumps, I just, I wasn't able to
01:52stay consistent. So while I would have loved to still be able to breastfeed my daughter now, I'm happy that
01:59I was able to do so for the four and a half months that I was successful. And it's definitely taken some
02:06time to get over. But luckily, there have been lots of resources and I've had lots of support. You know, I
02:14talked to fellow moms, I joined Facebook groups, I used the lactation consultant, I leaned on my husband, you
02:21know, so it's, it's just really important to remember, you know, if you choose to breastfeed, awesome. If you choose to
02:30exclusively pump, awesome. If you choose to use formula, like I eventually did. Awesome. I mean, breastfeeding
02:40can be so difficult. And for sometimes, you know, sometimes for some people, it's impossible. So always
02:48remember, because I know I have to keep telling myself this sometimes, breastfeeding does not define
02:54you being a good mom. It just doesn't. Because it's not the only thing out there that shows that
03:03you're doing a great job. You know, as long as you are providing a child with a loving and nurturing
03:10environment, they are going to be happy and love you just the same.
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