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In this week's episode of ESSENCE Now, our Slayed or Shade panel takes on the week's buzziest topics, and our panel of fearless travelistas give tips for women looking to travel by themselves.
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00:00I'm Akon Dovu, and today on Essence Now, Lecrae is here, and he's going to perform a verse from his new album, Just For Us.
00:13Plus, have you ever thought about traveling alone?
00:16Well, we've got some great tips to make your first solo vacation your best trip ever.
00:21But right now, it's time for the hot list, the biggest stories you're buzzing about today.
00:25So who watched VH1's hip-hop honors last night?
00:32Missy Elliott and Tiana Taylor killed it, of course, but some fans and a few celebs are a little upset at the network's choice of guests.
00:40Lili of SWV took to Facebook with this.
00:43So VH1 is doing a show on game changes of the 90s, but not invite most of the artists that change the game?
00:50Where'd they do that at?
00:51I'm so sick of the de-riding popularity contest that flatters this new industry.
00:56Whew, while her girls from SWV and TLC quickly co-signed, some fans think Lili is overreacting just a bit, Kendra Powers wrote in part on Facebook.
01:06Unfortunately, they can't fit everyone from the 90s in a one-hour show.
01:10TLC had a whole movie done by VH1.
01:13Like, calm down, there's always next year.
01:15Despite calls from the friends and family of Kanika Jenkins, the FBI says it will not investigate the teen's death.
01:26Instead, it will allow local police to continue to handle the case as an accidental death, not a homicide.
01:33Kanika's body was found in a freezer at a Chicago-area hotel earlier this month,
01:37but her family and friends believe that surveillance video released by the hotel is incomplete or has been altered.
01:43The family's lawyer recently released this statement.
01:46Despite requests for all evidence, we have only been provided snippets of video, none of which shows Kanika Jenkins walking into a freezer.
01:54This Kevin Hart story is getting messy.
02:01Now, TMZ is reporting that the woman at the center of the alleged sex tape is, quote,
02:06a traveling stripper who Kevin partied with in Vegas.
02:09Although the woman says she's not the one trying to extort Kevin for millions of dollars,
02:13she did allegedly agree to take a lie detector test for a mere $420,000.
02:18And, of course, folks are already taking sides.
02:21Old Baj tweeted, Kevin Hart cheated on his ex-wife with his current wife.
02:26She knew what she was getting into, my G.
02:28But Prince OBS called for some compassion.
02:31I get it.
02:32Kevin Hart cheated.
02:32He's also a victim of extortion.
02:34And if my memory serves me right, revenge porn.
02:38He continued, I'm not saying I support Kevin Hart, but all I ask for is consistency with outrage.
02:43If you cheered on Blac Chyna, don't throw stones at Kevin.
02:46Hmm, so which is worse?
02:48Kevin's alleged cheating or the fact that people are using his mistake for their own come-up?
02:53Send us your comments using the hashtag EssenceNow because we're talking about it in Slade or Shade next.
02:59It's Tuesday, September 19th, and it's time for Essence Now.
03:03Welcome to Essence Now.
03:16I'm your host, Makon Dovu, and remember, you can talk to us anytime using the hashtag EssenceNow or by email at EssenceNow at Essence.com.
03:25We always want to hear what you got to say.
03:26All right, let's get into some Slade or Shade, where we take on the week's buzziest topics.
03:32Joining me in the studio are Essence digital content producer Whitney Gaspard, founding partner of Hennypalooza and host of the Flagrant 2 podcast, Kazeem Famuyideh, and Essence fashion assistant, Avon Dorsey.
03:45Welcome, everyone.
03:46Hey.
03:47Hey, let's get started.
03:48As I mentioned in today's hot list, the streets are still buzzing over that video that an extortionist is claiming features Kevin Hart having sex with a woman who is not his very pregnant wife, Aniko.
04:00Now, Kevin still hasn't said whether the man in the tape is indeed him, but what he does make clear is that he ain't cutting no check.
04:07Listen to what he said.
04:09I'm not going to also allow a person to have financial gain off of my mistakes.
04:14And in this particular situation, that's what was attempted.
04:19I said I'd rather fess up to my mistakes.
04:22Hmm.
04:22So, panelists, here's the question.
04:24Do we give Kevin credit for apologizing for any indiscretion, or was he just doing damage control because he's being extorted?
04:31There's so much going on in the story, so I'm just going to open it up to you guys.
04:34What are you slaying or shading in this Kevin Hart situation?
04:38Whitney, go for it.
04:41Let's see the panels.
04:42Okay, let's do the panels.
04:44I'll give you a second to say.
04:47All right, everybody's panels in one, two, three.
04:51Hold up your side.
04:52Okay, Shade, Slade, and Whitney is competing.
04:56Okay, all right, I'll give you a second to marinate.
04:58Avon, I'll start with you.
04:59What are you thinking?
05:00So, I'm thinking that it's damage control.
05:03Anyone that's in a relationship, just don't cheat, period.
05:07And the fact that he's doing it on social media, it's just like you're trying to make the fans get on your side.
05:12I love Kevin Hart, love his work.
05:14He's been doing it for years, but just don't cheat.
05:16That's the number one rule in any relationship.
05:18I mean, it seems so simple, Kaz.
05:20Don't cheat.
05:21Yeah.
05:21Tell me your thoughts.
05:22I mean, obviously, you don't want to cheat on your woman, especially if she's pregnant.
05:26But there's so many layers for this.
05:28Especially.
05:29How about you just don't cheat?
05:30How about that?
05:30No, just don't cheat, period.
05:31But what I'm saying is, like, I understand why he came forward.
05:34Because, like, if a woman's asking for $10 million, like, first off, that woman, like, shot way out of her range.
05:39She would have asked, like, $500K, a million, maybe $2 million.
05:43Maybe it goes away.
05:43Maybe she gets her money.
05:44Now she's probably going to get nothing.
05:45She's probably going to catch a revenge porn case.
05:48All the outlets that ended up posting these videos are probably going to get sued, like Garker, with Hulk Hogan.
05:52Like, there's a lot of things that are messed up here.
05:55So, I kind of got to give him props for just kind of getting in front of it.
05:59And at least, if you're going to lose your wife, don't, like, lose your money, too.
06:02Don't lose your $10 million.
06:03Don't lose both.
06:04Okay.
06:04All right, Whitney.
06:05That's a good point.
06:06Yeah.
06:07But I have to say, like, shout out to Kevin for apologizing.
06:10He's a public figure.
06:11He has to apologize.
06:13A part of the reason why we love Kevin Hart so much is because he loves his family.
06:17He respects his family.
06:18So, when he's doing something like that to his family, we sort of are like, Kevin, what's good?
06:23What's going on?
06:24What are you doing?
06:25And so, I thought it was, like, a good thing to see him on there, even though it was sad.
06:29Can I just add?
06:31Yeah.
06:31Close this out.
06:32As a stand-up comedian, like, as a fan of his, I can't wait for his next special because
06:37I know he's going to talk about all this and he's not going to hold nothing back.
06:40And, you know, he's a funny guy.
06:41So, hey, like, if you're going to get caught and you're going to get put out there and a
06:45lot of your work comes from your personal life, like, you might as well make some gain out
06:49of it.
06:49Well, he going to learn today.
06:50He's going to learn today.
06:51He's going to learn.
06:52All right, let's check in with our girl Kayla to see what folks on social media are saying.
06:57Kayla, what's going on?
06:58Okay, so a lot of folks are yelling out damage control.
07:01Mark Berry says that's just what he's doing.
07:03Nicole Drake says he's a cheater, point blank and period.
07:06He'll do it again.
07:07Just be single and stop playing with marriage.
07:09Kalina Johnson said he said in an interview that he just got married too young.
07:12That was the reasoning for infidelities in the first marriage.
07:14Now he's saying he put himself in a situation where bad things could happen.
07:18Take some serious accountability, Kevin.
07:19Everyone's watching.
07:20Hello.
07:21We're all watching and we're talking about it.
07:23Do better, Kevin.
07:24Do better.
07:24Next up, Wendy Williams is clapping back at T.I. after the rapper went in on her,
07:29after the paparazzi took photos of her on the beach in a bikini.
07:34Oh, yes, Wendy.
07:36T.I. posted the images on his Instagram page with the caption that appeared to take the high road.
07:41But then he implied that the hate towards Wendy was warranted because she's, quote,
07:45malicious and vindictive on her show.
07:48Well, here's Wendy's response.
07:49Well, you know, T.I., I don't have a behind like you don't have height, which is why you wear lips.
08:01Gotta love that, Wendy.
08:02All right, panelists.
08:03In the case of Wendy's lack of booty and T.I.'s lack of height, who is getting a slay or a shade?
08:10All right, panelists?
08:11I need you to hold up your signs in three, two, one.
08:13Go for it.
08:15All right.
08:15We got a slay, slay, slay.
08:17Oh, a slay.
08:18Okay.
08:19Kaz, I feel like you want to speak strongly on this.
08:21Yeah, you know what?
08:22Here's one thing.
08:23Like, T.I. walked right into the trap.
08:25Like, this is what Wendy Williams does.
08:27Like, she's been knocking off, she's been like fighting off people talking about how she looks,
08:30how she's built like a man, all these other things for years.
08:33Like, this is a layup for her.
08:35You can't just go at her with some jokes about her physical appearance.
08:38Like, she has a daytime television.
08:40She's built an entire empire off of going at Kat's like this.
08:43So it's like, T.I.'s walking right into the trap, and he fell hook or in the sinker for it.
08:48So I got it.
08:49Yeah.
08:49Avon, thoughts?
08:51I would say love T.I., but just have a seat.
08:54Yeah.
08:54Because he's been chiming in on a lot of stuff with the whole Rob and Blac Chyna,
08:58and Rob came for him, set him down.
09:01Wendy came for him, set him down.
09:03You know what I mean?
09:03Just take a seat.
09:05Mind your business.
09:05There's a lot that he needs to do with the family hustles.
09:08So Wendy had every right to clap back, but also Wendy should know that she's going to be photographed.
09:13I love her.
09:14She's a sweetheart, but...
09:15She's 50-something.
09:17She is working at Whitney.
09:18I mean, it's slay.
09:19Okay.
09:20Yes, slay.
09:21Miss Wendy is out here with a bikini on, okay?
09:24And she can wear whatever she wants to.
09:25She is living her life with her husband, like, T.I., he come out of his business.
09:29Because, let me keep it there.
09:32Okay.
09:33Thank you, T.I.
09:35We appreciate your concern and your comments.
09:37No thanks.
09:38Have a seat.
09:38T.I. is flipping through a thesaurus right now.
09:41Wait a clap back.
09:42All right.
09:42Let's check in with Kayla.
09:43What is social media saying about the Wendy Williams versus T.I. beast?
09:47There are some people who are on her side.
09:49Lissy Washington says, T.I., just stick to rapping.
09:52But some people had jokes.
09:53Tiana Barnes says, Wendy works my nerves.
09:55Kilo Key said, let's talk about how Wendy played herself wearing that damn bikini.
09:59Gialdini says, after seeing Wendy Williams in the bikini photo, I'm really going to stop
10:02being so hard on myself.
10:03Oh.
10:04Wow.
10:05Wendy gives us a little bit of hope.
10:07Okay.
10:08Last but not least, SportsCenter co-anchor Jamel Hill has been under fire after going on a Twitter
10:13rant criticizing President Trump, calling him, quote, a white supremacist who has largely
10:18surrounded himself with other white supremacists.
10:21Now, while Jamel's co-workers have largely supported her, the president of ESPN is standing
10:26by his initial statement about the company's social media guidelines.
10:30He wrote,
10:30Now, while Jamel is obviously a public figure, some think this situation has ramifications
10:48for everyday folks, too.
10:50When it comes to free speech, panelists, what say you hold up your signs?
10:54Are we slaying?
10:55Should your employer be able to police your social media, slayed or shade?
10:59And three, two, one.
11:02That was a slow, slow road.
11:03I thought you were going somewhere, wasn't it?
11:06I thought you were going somewhere else.
11:07Okay.
11:07So, shade.
11:08So, shade.
11:09Okay.
11:09Your employer should not, I mean, if you're a public figure and you have a personal profile,
11:15the reality is people are going to hang on to your every word.
11:18And that does reflect on where you are every day.
11:21If you're at a desk somewhere reporting on something, people are going to think about
11:24that.
11:24Viewers, in her case, are going to think about, but slave to her for standing up for herself
11:29and being like, I should be able to say whatever I want.
11:31And she should be allowed room to say whatever she wants.
11:34And she's not the first person to call him a white supremacist.
11:37There are a number of people, including news anchors, who say the same thing.
11:41Like, come on, Kaz.
11:43Yeah, I agree.
11:43I mean, she's not the first person to call Trump a white supremacist or a white supremacist
11:48sympathizer.
11:49She's not the first person on ESPN to call Trump a white supremacist, a white supremacist
11:54sympathizer.
11:55My thing is, the job title is ESPN Personality.
11:59Like, I'm more shading, like, the people who see Jamil think something and say something
12:03and think the entire company thinks that way.
12:06Like, what kind of idiot do you got to be for somebody to see somebody that is talking
12:10about, you know, their own personal views and thinking that represents hundreds of thousands
12:15of employees?
12:16The entire company, right.
12:17So I understand where, like, you know, as a company, you kind of got to, like, play both
12:20lines and, like, not make sure you're alienating an entire, you know, section of the community
12:26or whatever, but at the same time, it's like, come on, smarten up.
12:29Like, you're a personality.
12:30You hire this person so they can speak their mind, and that's why you give her ratings.
12:34That's why you put the six on primetime television because this is what she does.
12:39So it's like, to come at her for doing what's gotten her to the top is ridiculous.
12:42And for the record, she didn't do it on TV.
12:45She did it on Twitter.
12:46On her social media.
12:46So I'll let you close this out, Avon.
12:48Should your employer have the right to police what you tweet?
12:51No.
12:52No.
12:52I'm shading the employer, and then I'm giving her the slate because she spoke her mind.
12:57And the fact that Trump has ties to his family being white supremacists or having white supremacist
13:04ties, like, that's not nothing.
13:05It's not anything new.
13:07So the fact that she stood up for herself, she said what she said, and she said what everyone
13:11else was thinking.
13:12So she shouldn't be, you know, in trouble for that.
13:16Twitter is a freedom of speech platform.
13:17Right.
13:18That's why it was established.
13:20And someone else is going to look at her and pick her up and take her away from ESPN.
13:24So you better get it together, ESPN.
13:25It walks like a duck and talks like a duck.
13:28Kayla, tell us what our Facebook fam has to say about Jemele Hill and ESPN.
13:32Definitely.
13:32People are not here for the Jemele hate.
13:35Michelle Piper says, ESPN, the way you handle the Jemele Hill incident shows your double standard
13:39with regards to employees.
13:41It has cost you tons of viewers.
13:43At JennyC721, we need to write and call ESPN in support of Jemele.
13:47She's a great sportscaster.
13:48She is correct in her assessment of number 45.
13:51Lili Glenn says, so basically, I'm always at work.
13:53And so I need to always keep my mouth shut.
13:55Anything I do at this point reflects back at my job.
13:57Guess we need to whisper out our thoughts from now on.
14:00Whisper our thoughts.
14:01Oh, my gosh.
14:02Thank you, everyone, for joining us.
14:04Thank you so much.
14:05All right.
14:05Coming up, our expert panel is standing by with lots of tips for taking your first solo
14:10vacay.
14:11But first, we caught up with Issa Rae on the red carpet of the Emmys to find out what she
14:15thinks about the strong reactions to the finale of Insecure.
14:19Issa, from the first scene of the second season, imagined herself sitting down with Lawrence and
14:27imagined being her.
14:28And so to have that closure conversation where they were both, you know, not hostile towards
14:34each other was just so fun to be able to write.
14:37Jay is just such a phenomenal actor, and he's so much fun to play off of.
14:41And I don't like being in my feelings.
14:43I cry, like, once every three years.
14:45So to have to dig into those emotions, you feel it, you know?
15:11Hey, Essence Now family.
15:22I'm Charlie Penn, Essence.com Senior Lifestyle and Relationships Editor.
15:26And here with me are some ladies who have done what a lot of us want to do, but let's be
15:31real.
15:32We're just a little too fearful.
15:33And that is to travel solo.
15:35Here to debunk all the myths and commonly asked questions about traveling by yourself
15:39are founder of Luxe Life Media, Christina Rice, Essence Entertainment Director, Corey Murray,
15:46and style expert and author of Looking Fly on a Dime, Patrice J. Williams.
15:51Hi, ladies.
15:52Hi.
15:53Welcome, welcome.
15:55Okay, so ladies, we're all very familiar with girls trips.
15:58Movie was huge.
15:59We see them on our feeds and all of that.
16:01But there's a whole other type of adventure.
16:03Tell us where you've taken your solo trips before.
16:05Where would you go?
16:06I'm Grenada, Amsterdam, and Spain.
16:10Amsterdam's a good one.
16:11Corey, where did you travel solo?
16:13London, Rio, and I guess maybe I did a tour of Tuscany by myself, but I was on a group
16:19trip.
16:19Okay, fancy.
16:20But I did go by myself.
16:22You had a moment alone, yes.
16:24Okay.
16:25Belize, I've done Bahamas, Jamaica, and Paris.
16:29Okay, you guys are giving me a travel ending already.
16:31I would love to do Paris.
16:32Do you guys, now, how did you start the idea off?
16:35Do you plan to travel alone?
16:36Like, is it like I'm taking a solo trip, or is it that your friend cancels on you at
16:40the last minute, somebody bails?
16:41How did the solo trips happen?
16:43For me, it was, I'm a huge fan of Jamiroquai.
16:47And Jamiroquai's from London.
16:48And I think this must have been around the year 2000.
16:51You know, everybody thought the world was going to end.
16:52So, I thought, well, when the world didn't end, I said, I want to see Jamiroquai in London.
17:00Like, that was my bucket list.
17:01And next thing you know, he was performing.
17:04I bought my ticket.
17:05They mailed it to me.
17:06And I booked my ticket to London because I really wanted to see him there.
17:11That was my initial reason.
17:13You just went for it.
17:14Bucket list.
17:15Yep.
17:15What about you, Gacine?
17:17Let's see.
17:18With Amsterdam, I was on my way to a girls' trip in Dubai.
17:22And so, I purposely chose a long layover.
17:25It was like 12 hours.
17:27So, I could spend the day there and just explore all the places that I wanted to go.
17:31And then for Grenada, I was getting my yoga teacher certification.
17:36And it was 10 very intense weeks.
17:38It was all weekends.
17:40Okay.
17:40So, I knew I wouldn't be able to do anything.
17:41And I always wanted to go to Grenada.
17:43And so, it was just like, it was literally two weeks out.
17:46And I was like, I'm going.
17:48And I booked my flight that night.
17:49And two weeks later, I was on a plane.
17:51So, both of you just went for it.
17:53Yeah.
17:53You same?
17:54Not really.
17:55I mean, now I intentionally travel alone.
17:57And I kind of prefer it.
17:58But my first international trip was to Belize.
18:01And I was supposed to go with a friend of mine.
18:03But she was living there for a while.
18:04But she had to leave due to a weird kind of shady issue that was happening there.
18:09Okay.
18:09There you go.
18:09She was like, I'm leaving.
18:11But if you still want to come, I'm like, but you're not going to be there.
18:14Right.
18:15But I'm like, you know what?
18:16I'm going to go.
18:16At the time, I'd just been laid off from my job.
18:18So, I'm like, I'm going for it.
18:20And since then, I've been traveling solo.
18:22But no, it did not start out with me intentionally, like, wanting to do it alone.
18:25But now I love it.
18:27And I just book flights left and right by myself.
18:28And if someone comes, then hey, if not, oh, well.
18:30That's amazing.
18:31Love it.
18:32And I think what you tap into is real.
18:33The fear, right?
18:34We talk about that.
18:35Corey, how did you get over the fear, like, that you felt, like, kind of getting on that plane and saying, okay, I'm headed to London.
18:40Well, it was two things.
18:41One was that if I didn't go, I would have to live with the fact that I'm missing out on this experience because I was afraid.
18:47All right?
18:48I had been to London before.
18:49It's a lot like New York.
18:51So, it was a little bit of a cheat of a city to go to by yourself.
18:54But still, I was going to be by myself.
18:56But when I went to Rio, luckily, my cousin, Kalilah, had already went.
19:01And I remember us talking one night.
19:02I was like, you sure I'm not going to get stabbed?
19:04I'm not going to get, like, that.
19:06You know what I mean?
19:06Like, what did you do?
19:08And she really walked me through it.
19:09And she was like, Corey, again, she said, you have to keep your New York sensibilities about you.
19:14Yes.
19:14And if you do that, you're going to be fine.
19:16So, it was talking.
19:18And then, also, I wanted to live my best life.
19:22And I didn't want to be in the way of that.
19:23Oh, man.
19:24And speaking of that, as women, especially, we have to think about being safe.
19:28Christina, what goes into a solo trip itinerary and planning and prep versus a group or girlfriend's trip?
19:34How do you prepare differently?
19:35Well, I'm a Google queen.
19:37And Google is alive and well.
19:39So, I research.
19:40And that's how I actually choose my destination with two things.
19:43It's a good airline deal.
19:45And then, after researching, it's like, okay, this is the place I want to go.
19:50You know, and the first thing I look at it, is it safe for a woman by herself?
19:55Like, I just put that in Google.
19:56Traveling to Cuba solo.
19:58As a woman.
19:58Yeah.
19:59And a good thing, too, is, like, there's so many personal stories out there.
20:03Like, I just go to blogs.
20:04Like, it's great to, like, read content and travel.
20:07But read somebody's, you know, personal account of their experience.
20:11And that's kind of, like, how I determine where I'm going to go.
20:15And if it's whether it's a city or a Caribbean island or whatever the case may be.
20:19Those are my two top, you know, things.
20:22Yeah, that's perfect.
20:23You have to be safe.
20:24And Patrice, what about you?
20:25What do you do differently when you travel solo versus when you're with the girls?
20:29Not that much, honestly.
20:30Same thing?
20:30Pretty much.
20:31I mean, I say just use the same common sense you use at home.
20:34Like, don't go down a dark alley.
20:36Whether you're at home if you're in Bed-Stuy or if you're away.
20:39Like, just common sense stuff.
20:41But what about activities?
20:42Are you guys still drinking?
20:43You know what I mean?
20:44Are you still going out to bars, restaurants?
20:45I do, but I know my limit with everything.
20:47Like, even if I'm out drinking with a friend, I know if that's that friend who's going to
20:51drink too much.
20:52So maybe I have to be the one to kind of monitor them.
20:54Right.
20:54So if I'm by myself, it's like, all right, limited to two drinks and maybe one brown drink.
20:59And that's kind of one brown drink.
21:01Keep your eye on your surroundings.
21:03You have to know, I make sure that I'm not wearing a lot of fancy, sparkly jewelry because
21:07I love dressing very sparkly.
21:09We see.
21:10Yeah, as you can say.
21:11So I just kind of use common sense.
21:14And even just being a New Yorker and seeing other tourists and seeing the things that they
21:17do that they shouldn't, I make sure that I don't do those things.
21:20So pulling out a ton of cash, like, don't do that.
21:23Why do you have wads of 20s and 100s?
21:25Be smart.
21:26Yeah, just be smart.
21:27So stuff like that.
21:27I always just try to be even smarter and just be aware of whatever's surrounding.
21:30Now, what about loneliness?
21:32Do you ever feel a little lonely on vacation?
21:34I mean, I know we're doing this, we're feeling empowered, but do you ever miss having, like,
21:38a girlfriend or a family member there?
21:40No.
21:40No?
21:41Corey?
21:42She's like, no, girl.
21:43She's like, no.
21:43I'm good.
21:45I will admit, when I got to London, I was, you know, the thrill of it kind of went away
21:50when I got, it was like a renaissance fair that Jameerich was performing at.
21:54So when I got to the field, I realized, and you know what, I got there in the middle of
21:57the day because I was so excited.
21:58He didn't come on until nighttime.
22:01So I had, like, five hours to myself.
22:04There's only so much I could walk around and do, and that's when I got lonely and I didn't
22:08bring a book.
22:09But what happened was I ended up befriending some girls because they saw me kind of standing
22:15around.
22:15And you're like, hey, girl.
22:16Oh, yeah.
22:17And so we started talking, and it was so funny because I remember when the concert
22:20was over, I was going to go back to the tube, and I could see them over there hustling.
22:25And they were like, I guess they were like, I think she's safe.
22:28So they gave me a ride back to my hotel, and we ended up hooking up later on during the
22:35week.
22:35That was the moment.
22:35Like, they took me to Brixton.
22:37Oh, that's all right.
22:37You know what I mean?
22:38So we ended up, and now, you know, I'm still cool with them on Facebook.
22:41So it worked out.
22:42And what about you, Patrice?
22:43Are you checking in with friends and family?
22:45Like, are you making friends like Corey?
22:47What are you doing?
22:47I definitely have to check in.
22:48My family, they don't really travel a lot, and they're always like, you're traveling by
22:52yourself.
22:52Don't get kidnapped.
22:53Like, don't be like the movie Taken.
22:54I'm like, really?
22:55Who says that's Taken?
22:56Yeah, they literally said that to me.
22:58I'm like, I'll try not to get sold into slavery.
23:00Thanks.
23:01But I make sure that I check in, like, every morning.
23:03I have, like, my aunt, my cousin, my mom.
23:05Those are the three people.
23:06They have my itinerary.
23:08They have my flight info.
23:09Every morning, I check in.
23:10I'm like, as long as I have Wi-Fi, I'll send you an iMessage on Facebook.
23:13So I check in with them.
23:15But as far as loneliness, I'm an only child.
23:17So I'm kind of used to, like, just doing things on my own and just finding my own
23:21entertainment.
23:22And it is a great way, like you said, to just meet new people.
23:25And other people who are traveling solo as well, they're like, oh, there's that girl
23:28by herself.
23:28So maybe I'll talk to her.
23:30They're more likely to do that compared to if you were in a group or something like
23:33that.
23:34So I do want to add one thing.
23:35When I was in Rio by myself, I really wanted to go to a samba school that I found out.
23:40I shouldn't.
23:40I should have Googled.
23:42It was two hours away from Rio.
23:44Oh, wow.
23:44And I was getting ready to get in this cab.
23:46But luckily, the hotel desk was like, this is two hours away.
23:51Oh, wow.
23:51So I had to put my safety over my loneliness because I ended up just going to the hotel
23:59bar.
24:00Hang out.
24:00And I was feeling bad.
24:01But it was like, girl, I didn't want to get caught out there.
24:03And I was going to get back.
24:04So I had to just deal with the loneliness.
24:06So you have to kind of accept you are going to be lonely because you have to put your safety
24:10first.
24:11I bring a lot of reading material.
24:14I read something recently on a blog I thought was really cool, especially like checking in
24:18in social media.
24:20It's like leaving a breadcrumb.
24:21Yeah.
24:22Breadcrumb.
24:23Absolutely.
24:23So you're posting, you know, Insta stories or whatever.
24:27But just like Patrice, my family doesn't travel a lot.
24:30So my mom will send like government warning.
24:33They just want to know that you're okay.
24:34I was going to Belize last year and like she sent this like whole like Taurus warning document.
24:41I was like, mom, that was from 2015.
24:43They just, you know what, they love you.
24:44But you know what, Christina, that's a great tip.
24:47Leave a breadcrumb.
24:48Let your family know that you're okay.
24:49Corey, Patrice, do you guys have any tips just to wrap it up for anyone who's considering
24:53going forward, taking that first solo trip?
24:56What can you tell them?
24:57I think it's like Christina said, do your research.
24:59Talk to people who've done it and just don't be scared.
25:03Like, don't be scared.
25:05You're going to be fine.
25:06I think the rare chances you hear of those people who get lost, I guarantee they must
25:11have did something wrong.
25:13You know what I mean?
25:13They got too drunk.
25:14They got something.
25:15I'm not trying to blame anyone, but just be very, very smart.
25:19And Patrice, what about you?
25:20How do you get over that fear?
25:21What's your advice to anyone?
25:22I would say don't let family and friends talk you out of it.
25:25Like my family, they like, really?
25:27You want to go?
25:28Like, you should just stay here.
25:29I'm like, nah, I'm going.
25:30My ticket's been bought.
25:31Hotel is booked, everything.
25:32So don't let other people talk you out of it.
25:34Sometimes they're just afraid to do it themselves and they don't want you to do it.
25:37But put simply, what we really want everyone to remember is go, have fun, just be prepared,
25:43but go for it, right?
25:44Absolutely.
25:45You guys have definitely inspired me.
25:46Ladies, thank you so much for joining us today and sharing your travel stories.
25:50Don't move.
25:50More Essence Now is up next.
25:52You're watching Essence Now.
26:19And I'm your host, Malkon Lovu.
26:21And it's time to check in with you one more time on social.
26:24Our girl, Kayla, has been combing social media all show long.
26:27Hey, Kayla.
26:29So we've got lots of comments still coming in on Kevin Hart's recent cheating scandal and extortion plot.
26:34And Angela King says,
26:35Kevin Hart is not a victim.
26:37He's just trying to do damage control.
26:38His wife, Anniko Hart, knew what she was getting into.
26:40He only came clean because of his investors.
26:43Yikes.
26:44Leela Glenn says that apology was whack.
26:45Kevin needs a yon to fix my life.
26:47My goodness.
26:48Perdita Smith says he's no different than pro athletes and men in general.
26:52So a lot of people not here for the Kevin Hart apology.
26:54I feel for Kevin Hart personally.
26:56You do?
26:57I do.
26:57This is personal and embarrassing.
26:58But he opened up his world to the public.
27:00So I hope that his entire family can get through it.
27:03Kayla.
27:04Kayla.
27:04We're usually here.
27:05But on this, no way.
27:07It's so embarrassing.
27:08Just don't cheat, Kevin Hart.
27:09Don't cheat.
27:10No.
27:11Remember to tune in next Tuesday at 3 p.m. for an all-new Essence Now.
27:16Closing us out today is a Grammy-winning artist whose new album,
27:19All Things Work Together, drops September 22nd.
27:23Oh, that's so awesome.
27:24Here's Lecrae with this special inspiring verse just for us.
27:28Hey, what's going on, y'all?
27:29This is Lecrae.
27:30And listen, man, I appreciate the opportunity to share with y'all my new album,
27:33All Things Work Together.
27:35Man, it's a beautiful project that I sincerely think everybody will appreciate
27:39if you ever felt like you were drowning in hopelessness
27:41or just needed to recognize and realize that everything that you may be going
27:45through and experiencing is all for a greater purpose and a greater reason.
27:49This is a project for you.
27:50So I'm going to just give you a little sample, man, this verse I'm about to give you.
27:54I was just inspired by the things that I've seen in my life
27:57and kind of where I was at.
27:58Over the last couple years.
28:00So, back like I never left.
28:03I got my mind fixated on finding freedom.
28:05I ain't thinking about missing a step.
28:07Real rap prodigy.
28:08Still an anomaly.
28:09Frequently frequent in past times when I was trying to be.
28:12All that I am but never thought I could.
28:13Go where I went but never thought I would.
28:15A would-be Carter G. Woodson.
28:16My mama's good son.
28:17My father's bastard.
28:18Fighting to flee Satan's disaster here and hereafter.
28:21And I ain't trying to be nobody past her.
28:23But I'll probably be his favorite rapper.
28:24I'm just keeping it real.
28:25The saints love me because I say what they feel.
28:27The sinners love me because I'm helping them heal.
28:29You can see the appeal.
28:30But Lord knows I'm a sinner too.
28:31I'm trying to run my race and finish too.
28:33So you can limit your ears.
28:34And let me tell you how this nappy-headed kid did it big.
28:37Trying to help the world live.
28:38Man, it's all God.
28:40Much love to y'all, man.
28:41God bless.
28:41All things work together.
28:42All things work together.
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