00:00I want to talk about a woman who seems to be everywhere these days, Taraji P. Henson.
00:07From running an empire, hosting SNL, and now penning a memoir, Taraji is never giving up.
00:12Something else she's just not giving up on is love.
00:15Sharia, do you believe that men are intimidated by Taraji's success?
00:18You know, after interviewing hundreds of men for the pages of Essence, I have to tell you, no.
00:23All the single men that we interviewed, they were not intimidated by the fact that a woman had a passion professionally.
00:29They just wanted to know that with pursuing your passions, you would make time and energy for the relationship.
00:34So for a woman like Taraji, as long as she lets it known on the dating scene that I'm willing to make us a priority, she'll be just fine.
00:41And I also want to add that it's the right man that's not intimidated by your success.
00:45Absolutely. Not every guy is comfortable.
00:46Because sometimes, you know, we go into a situation and we say, yeah, I really like A or I'm comfortable with A, but then you're like, oh, yeah, I don't know about this.
00:52Yeah.
00:52So I think it's just, you know, like you said, that honest conversation.
00:54She's a special person who can deal with her lifestyle, so not every guy is compatible with a woman like that.
00:59True.
00:59But also someone can be her perfect match.
01:03I agree.
01:04And when Taraji was asked the very same question by Essence writer Brittany Daniels, she replied, and I quote,
01:09What does that mean intimidating?
01:11I'm confident in who I am.
01:12I don't emasculate men.
01:14I love to be feminine and fall back and let a man be a man.
01:18Do many women feel like their success is intimidating to men?
01:21A lot of women do feel that way, and it's only because they've encountered men who maybe were a little put off by it.
01:26So it's important that you let it be known that just because I'm killing it at work doesn't mean that I won't be able to be supportive of you in a relationship.
01:34And so we've had our relationship dynamics change so much with modern technology, with all these opportunities available to women.
01:40And so our relationships have to finally catch up to our new normal.
01:44That evolution has to take place across the board.
01:47Definitely.
01:47We posted this question on Twitter and received some very interesting responses.
01:51At Darcelle World said, I wouldn't say intimidate, but I would say worry that we no longer need them and we know we're not expendable.
01:59What are your thoughts on that?
02:00Well, for so long, we equated men with money.
02:03So we thought that what a woman needed in a relationship was just financial security.
02:07And now for a lot of women, we're able to pay our own bills.
02:10But it doesn't mean that a man doesn't bring so much value to the relationship.
02:14So you have to remind your partner that just because you aren't taking care of all the bills doesn't mean that you aren't giving me things that are invaluable.
02:20So having that type of support, having that emotional security, having someone who will take care of you or just plug your phone in when it's dead and you forgot to charge it.
02:28All those things mean so much.
02:30So as a woman, you do have to make sure that your man knows that you bring so much value to our life.
02:34And this is also my PSA to the ladies out there.
02:37PSA.
02:37Tweet it.
02:38Send it to your girlfriend.
02:40Also does it mean you have to keep telling your man, I don't need you.
02:42No, that's a huge no-no.
02:44You don't need to do that.
02:44We don't need, because you will find out that he will listen to that.
02:47And over time, he will say, you don't need me, then you won't have me.
02:51And so you don't want to put that type of toxic energy around your relationship.
02:54As women, if a man kept saying, I don't need you, how would we feel?
02:57I mean, come on.
02:57Absolutely.
02:58That's a bad, you know, and even if, you know, for a lot of, we might have seen that over generations.
03:01We might have saw auntie or grandma do that.
03:02But you don't want to have those bad habits in your house.
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