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00:01Did Donald Trump send Tom Homan to Minnesota because Fox News told him to?
00:06That's what people are wondering after Fox host Brian Kilmeade floated the idea on air.
00:11What I would do is just bring Tom Homan in.
00:13And just 20 minutes after, Donald Trump followed his advice and announced Homan's involvement.
00:20And now, another important message from Fox News to President Trump.
00:25Trump should resign and go back to school for a dance.
00:28Let's take a dance.
00:29The President should retire, retire, retire, retire, because he, he, he lost all his marbles.
00:37Shake, shake, shake, shake your big butt.
00:40It's The Late Show with Stephen Colbert.
00:45Tonight, DT Phone Homan.
00:49Plus, Stephen Welcom.
00:52Sal Barak-Low.
00:54And George Saunders.
00:56Featuring Louis Cato and The Late Show Pham.
01:02And now, live on tape from the Ed Sullivan Theater in New York City, it's Stephen Colbert.
01:10Absolutely.
01:17Welcome, welcome, welcome, one and all, to The Late Show.
01:33I'M YOUR HOST, STEPHEN COLBERT, AND TONIGHT I WANT TO TAKE ALL THAT
01:39ENERGY, AND I'M GOING TO USE IT TO OFFER ANOTHER SALUTE TO THE
01:44PEOPLE OF MINNESOTA, WHO HAVE STOOD UP FOR EACH OTHER IN
01:48BEAUTIFUL WAYS.
01:49THESE PEOPLE HAVE BEAUTIFULLY STOOD UP FOR EACH OTHER IN THE
01:52MIDST OF THE VIOLENCE AND FEAR-MONGERING OF THIS
01:53ADMINISTRATION, AND TODAY, MINNESOTA OFFICIALS ANNOUNCED
01:57THAT TRUMP IS WITHDRAWING FEDERAL OFFICERS FROM MINNESOTA.
02:00WE DON'T KNOW HOW MANY.
02:04WE DON'T KNOW WHEN, WE DON'T KNOW HOW MANY, BUT I'M TOLD WE
02:07ALREADY HAVE FOOTAGE OF ONE FEDERAL OFFICER STANDING DOWN.
02:11I...
02:14I WILL NEVER PASS UP AN OPPORTUNITY TO SHOW THAT FOOTAGE.
02:19APPARENTLY, TRUMP LEARNED THAT VIOLENT, MASSED GOONS ARE NOT
02:23CROWD-PLEASERS, AND HE LEARNED THAT FROM HIS MOST-TRUSTED ADVISOR,
02:26THE TV.
02:28REPORTEDLY, OVER THE WEEKEND, WORKING FROM THE OTHER
02:30OVAL OFFICE, TRUMP WATCHED AS FOOTAGE OF THE SHOOTING OF ALEX
02:33PREDI PLAYED ON REPEAT FROM MINNEAPOLIS, AS ONE INSIDER
02:37DESCRIBED THE SITUATION, IT'S AND POTUS KNEW HE NEEDED TO UN- IT.
02:43AND TRUMP KNOWS BETTER THAN ANYBODY, IF YOU DON'T UN- QUICK ENOUGH,
02:48YOU COULD END UP WITH AN ERIC.
02:50SO, HIS BIG MOVE, BIG MOVE, I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY TO USE BAD
02:57WORDS LIKE ERIC.
02:58HIS BIG MOVE, HIS BIG MOVE IN BEGINNING THE UN-ING,
03:03SENDING IN TRUMP'S BORDER CZAR AND LOVE CHILD OF SHRECK AND
03:07MRS. POTATO HEAD TOM HOMEN, JUST- JUST TO REFRESH YOUR MEMORY,
03:12THOUGH IT SOUNDS LIKE I DON'T NEED TO, UH, TOM HOMEN IS NOT COOL.
03:16HE WAS THE ARCHITECT OF TRUMP'S FAMILY SEPARATION POLICY,
03:20AND IN 2024, HE ALLEGEDLY ACCEPTED $50,000 FROM AN UNDERCOVER FBI AGENT
03:28THAT WAS HIDDEN IN A BAG FROM THE MEDITERANEAN FAST CASUAL
03:31RESTAURANT CAVA. SO, DOWNSIDE, TERRORIZING FAMILIES
03:37AND MAYBE TAKING BRIBES. UPSIDE, HE BROUGHT HUMMUS.
03:41NOW THAT HOMEN, UH, NOW THAT HOMEN'S IN, THE OLD GUARD IS OUT,
03:46BECAUSE REPORTEDLY, IN RESPONSE TO THE OUTRAGE OVER ALEX PREDI'S
03:49MURDER, THE HEAD BORDER PATROL THUG IN MINNESOTA, GREG BAVINO,
03:53HAS LOST HIS JOB AS COMMANDER AT LARGE.
03:57YEAH.
04:01ANOTHER REMINDER, GREG BAVINO HAS BEEN ACCUSED OF USING RACIAL
04:06PROFILING TO ROUND UP HISPANIC MEN, WOMEN, AND CHILDREN,
04:09CREATED AN ENFORCEMENT STRATEGY WHERE OFFICERS JUMP OUT OF UNMARKED
04:12RENTAL VANS TO AMBUSH IMMIGRANT DAY LABORERS, AND HE ADMITTED TO
04:16LYING TO JUSTIFY DEPLOYING TEAR GAS AGAINST PROTESTERS.
04:20AS ONE SOURCE DESCRIBED HIS WHOLE DEAL, HE'S A COWBOY AND IT WAS A MESS.
04:26JUST LIKE THE JOHN BONJOVI SONG.
04:29I'M A COWBOY, THAT'S WHY I TEARGASED YOUR DAD, BUT ALSO I TEARGASED YOUR MOM.
04:42THE ONLY DOWNSIDE TO BAVINO GETTING YANKED FROM MINNESOTA IS THAT
04:47YESTERDAY WE WROTE THIS WHOLE SCRIPT ABOUT HOW BAVINO, WHO'S BEEN CALLED
04:52LITTLE NAPOLEON, IS SHORT AS HELL.
04:55NOW, I'LL NEVER GET TO TALK ABOUT HOW HE LOOKS LIKE A LITTLE BROTHER
04:59ABOUT TO PLAY PAINTBALL WITH THE SIXTH GRADERS.
05:03OR HOW HE CAN BARELY SEE OVER THE STEERING WHEEL.
05:07OR THE FACT THAT HE GOT HIS COAT OFF AN AMERICAN GIRL DOLL.
05:16NOW, NOW BAVINO IS ON HIS WAY BACK TO CALIFORNIA, WHERE HE'S EXPECTED TO
05:21RETIRE OR POSSIBLY GO BACK TO HIS FORMER JOB, BEING THE GUY THAT YOU HAVE TO BE TALLER THAN
05:26TO RIDE THE LOG FLUME.
05:29YEAH, COMMANDER AT LARGE.
05:33COMMANDER AT LARGE IS GENEROUS.
05:35GENEROUS.
05:36YOU CAN DONK ON HIM.
05:38IT'S NOT JUST GREG BAVINO IN TROUBLE, BECAUSE YESTERDAY TRUMP HELD A LATE-NIGHT CRISIS
05:42TALK WITH CHRISTIE NOEM AMID REPORTS THAT HER JOB IS AT SERIOUS RISK.
05:46WHY?
05:47IS HER HAT NOT BIG ENOUGH?
05:50I'M GUESSING TRUMP IS COMING DOWN HARD ON NOEM BECAUSE SHE HANDLED THE RESPONSE TO
05:54ALEX PREDI'S MURDER WITH ALL THE GRACE OF A DRUNK MR. BEAN ROLLER-SKATING THROUGH A MATERNITY
05:59WARD.
06:00ALSO, SHE HAS BEEN ONE OF BAVINO'S BIGGEST BACKERS AT DHS.
06:06AND NOEM HAS BEEN THE FACE OF THE ADMINISTRATION'S IMMIGRATION CRACKDOWN.
06:10THAT FACE, BROUGHT TO YOU BY DR.
06:12JANUS VON PLUMPENBERG.
06:14YOU KNOW HIS SLOGAN, I VENT TO MEDICAL SCHOOL ON A BOAT.
06:19ALL THIS STRESS CAN'T BE GOOD FOR THE PRESIDENT'S HEALTH.
06:22RUMORS HAVE BEEN SWIRLING ABOUT ALL SORTS OF MEDICAL ISSUES WITH HIM.
06:26SO, THE WHITE HOUSE RECENTLY AGREED TO A TRUMP INTERVIEW WITH NEW YORK MAGAZINE TITLED,
06:31AT STEPHEN MILLER'S ACTUAL REQUEST, THE SUPERHUMAN PRESIDENT.
06:36YES, SUPERHUMAN.
06:39LOOK, UP IN THE SKY, IT'S A BIRD, IT'S A PLANE, IT'S EPSTEIN'S PLANE.
06:44REMEMBER HOW HE SAID HE WAS GOING TO RELEASE THE EPSTEIN FILES?
06:46WHERE ARE THE...
06:53UNFORTUNATELY, THE INTERVIEW WENT SIDEWAYS ALMOST IMMEDIATELY.
06:56WHEN TRUMP SAID THIS ABOUT HIS FATHER, FRED,
06:58AT A CERTAIN AGE, ABOUT 86, 87, HE STARTED GETTING, WHAT DO THEY CALL IT?
07:04TRUMP POINTED TO HIS FOREHEAD AND LOOKED TO HIS PRESS SECRETARY FOR THE WORD THAT ESCAPED HIM,
07:09TO WHICH SHE RESPONDED, ALZHEIMERS.
07:16OKAY, NOT A GREAT, NOT A GREAT SIGN THERE.
07:19AND I'M CERTAINLY NOT SAYING DONALD TRUMP HAS ALZHEIMERS,
07:22BUT I FEEL LIKE HE DEFINITELY HAS SOME-ZHEIMERS.
07:28THE REPORTER, THE REPORTER, UH, HE PRESSED TRUMP ON WHETHER HE WORRIES
07:33ABOUT HIS FAMILY'S HISTORY OF DEMENTIA, TRUMP PLAYED IT COOL, SAYING,
07:37I DON'T THINK ABOUT IT AT ALL, YOU KNOW WHY?
07:41BECAUSE YOU ALREADY FORGOT THE QUESTION?
07:44IS THAT WHY?
07:46IS THAT...
07:53AFTER HE WAS DONE DEFENDING HIS QUESTIONABLE BRAIN,
07:55HE TURNED TO HIS UNREFRIDERATED HAND.
07:58TRUMP'S BEEN SAYING THE BRUISE IS FROM SHAKING SO MANY HANDS,
08:02AND DURING THE INTERVIEW, HE ADDED A FUN NEW TWIST,
08:05BLAMING WOMEN'S FINGERNAILS AND RINGS,
08:08INCLUDING ONE PARTICULARLY NASTY SLICE THAT CAME FROM A BOTCHED
08:12HIGH-FIVE WITH ATTORNEY GENERAL PAM BONDI.
08:15THAT... IS... DUMB.
08:20THERE'S ONLY ONE POSSIBLE REASON SOMEONE'S HANDS SHOULD LEAVE YOU
08:23WITH CUTS.
08:24I WAS HIGH-FIVING THIS TROUBLED YOUNG MAN NAMED EDWARD.
08:28REAL QUIET FELLA.
08:30CRAZY HAIR, PALE FACE, LIVES UP ON A HILL,
08:34MAKES BEAUTIFUL TAUPIARY ART.
08:36I CAN SEE... I CAN SEE WHY WENONA RYDER JUST LOVES THE FELLA.
08:42TRUMP AND HIS GAGGLE OF SYCOPHANCE REALLY TRIED TO TALK UP
08:46HIS PHYSICAL FITNESS.
08:47FOR EXAMPLE, HIS FORMER DOCTOR, NOW CONGRESSMAN RONNIE JACKSON,
08:50TOLD A STORY ABOUT SEEING THE PRESIDENT ON A TREADMILL SAYING
08:55TRUMP WAS WEARING GYM SHORTS AND A T-SHIRT AND, QUOTE,
08:58HE LOOKED LIKE AN ATHLETE FOR THE RECORD.
09:02BUT OFF THE RECORD, HAVE YOU EVER WONDERED WHAT IT WOULD LOOK LIKE
09:05IF YOU WATCHED A CLYSDAL DECOMPOSE IN A HEFTY BAG?
09:09NOW, ONE THING... ONE THING PAINTS A PICTURE.
09:13THAT PAINTS A PICTURE.
09:15ONE THING THAT MAKES IT HARD TO BELIEVE THE STORY THAT DONALD TRUMP
09:18IS THE FITTEST MAN EVER TO LIVE IS THAT HE KEEPS FALLING ASLEEP
09:22IN PUBLIC.
09:24BUT CAROLINE LEVITT HAD AN ANSWER FOR THAT, TOO.
09:26WHEN THE PRESIDENT RESTS HIS EYES, HE'S ACTUALLY, QUOTE,
09:29ACTIVELY LISTENING.
09:31SURE, THAT'S SUPER BELIEVABLE.
09:34JUST LIKE THAT HERBAL TEA MASCOT, THE ACTIVELY LISTENING BEAR.
09:38HE'S TOTALLY ALERT.
09:41AND DEFINITELY...
09:44HE'S DEFINITELY GOING TO REMEMBER TO PUT OUT THAT FIRE.
09:50SO, TRUMP HAS NOT HAD, UH, THE BEST WEEK.
09:53HE'S ALSO FACING A LAWSUIT CLAIMING IT'S ILLEGAL FOR HIM
09:56TO BUILD HIS BIG, BEAUTIFUL BALLROOM.
09:58SO THIS WEEKEND, HE POSTED...
10:00ALL OF THE STRUCTURAL STEEL, WINDOWS, DOORS,
10:03AC HEATING EQUIPMENT, MARBLE STONE, PRECAST CONCRETE,
10:08BULLET BLOOF WINDOWS, GLASS, ANTI-DRONE ROOFING,
10:12AND MUCH MORE HAS BEEN ORDERED, OR IS READY TO BE.
10:15AND THERE'S NO PRACTICAL OR REASONABLE WAY TO GO BACK.
10:20IT'S TOO LATE ADDING STOPPAGE OF CONSTRUCTION TO THIS LATE DATE,
10:24WHEN SO MUCH HAS ALREADY BEEN ORDERED AND DONE
10:26WOULD BE DEVASTATING TO THE WHITE HOUSE,
10:28OUR COUNTRY, AND ALL CONCERNED.
10:32THAT'S RIGHT.
10:36YES, IT IS SAD, YES.
10:38IT'S DEVASTATING TO ALL CONCERNED.
10:40MOTHER? MOTHER, WHY ARE YOU CRYING?
10:43OH, SWEET CHILD.
10:46THERE'S BEEN A CONSTRUCTION STOPPAGE ON THE PRESIDENT'S
10:48GOLDEN BRUNCH VENUE.
10:50FETCH ME MY SHAWL, FILL MY POCKETS WITH STONES,
10:53AND ROLL ME INTO THE RIVER.
10:58THANK YOU, THAT WAS JUST, THANK YOU.
11:00I'M AN ACTOR.
11:01I'M REALLY AN ACTOR.
11:04THIS IS JUST, THIS IS JUST A GIG FOR A, FOR A DECADE.
11:10HI, CARLY.
11:13OTHER MEMBERS OF THE TRUMP FAMILY AREN'T DOING MUCH BETTER.
11:15THE NEW MELANIA DOCUMENTARY HITS THEATERS ON FRIDAY.
11:18IT'S A, UH, IT'S A, OH, NO, NO, IT LOOKS FANTASTIC.
11:22IT'S A REAL PEEK BEHIND THE CURTAIN AT A WOMAN PICKING OUT CURTAINS.
11:26SHE, UH, TODAY, WAS IT TODAY SHE DID THIS?
11:28TODAY SHE WENT ON THE FOX AND FRIENDS TO HYPE IT UP.
11:31THIS STORY WAS NEVER TOLD BEFORE.
11:34SO, THE AUDIENCE WILL SEE ME, HOW I MANAGE MY BUSINESS,
11:40MY PHILANTHROPY, FAMILY, PREPARATION FOR THE INAGURATION,
11:46AND ALSO ESTABLISHING THE EAST WING FOR THE WHITE HOUSE.
11:51MADAM FIRST LADY, I, I HAVE SOME TERRIBLE NEWS.
11:57LET'S JUST SAY THE EAST WING NO LONGER BE BEST.
12:01OR, OR BE THERE.
12:07AMAZON BRIBED A WHOPPING $40 MILLION FOR THE MOVIE,
12:12AND AN ADDITIONAL $35 MILLION FOR MARKETING, PROMOTION, AND DISTRIBUTION.
12:16SO BIG BOX OFFICE, RIGHT? WRONG.
12:20SOCIAL MEDIA HAS BEEN FLOODED WITH IMAGES OF THEATERS IN MAJOR CITIES
12:23THAT HAVEN'T SOLD A SINGLE SEAT.
12:26AND...
12:31AND ESTIMATES ARE THAT THIS $75 MILLION MOVIE WOULD MAKE ONLY ONE
12:36OR TWO MILLION IN ITS OPENING WEEKEND.
12:38NOW, USUALLY TO SEE TRUMP BOMB THIS HARD, YOU'D HAVE TO BE ON A
12:41VENEZUELAN FISHING BOAT.
12:44WE CHECKED. I KNOW. WE CHECKED.
12:48AND HERE IN NEW YORK CITY, WHERE MELANIA LIVED AND WORKED AND SOCIALIZED
12:52FOR DECADES, IN TRUMP'S HOMETOWN, ON SATURDAY NIGHT OF OPENING WEEKEND
12:57AT THE REGAL AND AMC TIMESQUARE CINEMAS, THERE ARE TWO 7.30 SHOWINGS
13:02WITH EXACTLY ZERO TICKETS PURCHASED.
13:05THAT'S THE CROSSROADS OF THE WORLD.
13:15IT'S LITTLE IN THE BUSIEST BLOCKS ON THE PLANET.
13:19ZERO TICKETS SOLD AT THE AMC.
13:21THAT MUST BE HEARTBREAKING FOR THE FIRST LADY.
13:24BUT ON THE PLUS SIDE...
13:26HOT BREAK FEELS GOOD IN A PLACE LIKE THIS.
13:29WE'VE GOT A GREAT SHOW FOR YOU TONIGHT.
13:31MY GUESTS ARE SAM HOTWELL AND THE AUTHOR GEORGE SAUNERS.
13:35BUT WHEN WE COME BACK, WINTER IS HERE.
13:38WHAT IS IT SAYING?
13:40STICK AROUND AND FIND OUT.
13:47THE LATE SHOW IS STEPHEN COLBERT.
13:53SPONSORED BY TOM'S.
13:55FAST HEARTBURN RELIEF SO YOU CAN LOVE FOOD BACK.
14:01FAST HEARTBURN.
14:11GIVE IT UP FOR LEWIS KETO AND THE BAND, EVERYBODY.
14:15THERE YOU GO.
14:16COME ON.
14:20GIVE IT UP FOR THE PEOPLE I'M LUCKY NUF TO WORK WITH.
14:22MY WRITERS, THE FINEST WRITERS ON TELEVISION.
14:24GIVE IT UP, EVERYBODY.
14:27THERE YOU GO.
14:29TONIGHT WE HAVE JUST A FEW MOMENTS.
14:31I LOVE THIS ACTOR.
14:32SAM ROCKWELL IS GOING TO BE OUT HERE IN JUST A FEW MOMENTS.
14:35AND PERHAPS MY FAVORITE SHORT STORY WRITER LIVING ALIVE TODAY,
14:39GEORGE SAUNDERS WILL BE OUT HERE.
14:42HE'S GOT A NEW NOVEL.
14:43HE'S GOT A NEW NOVEL, VIGIL.
14:45FOLKS, RIGHT NOW, I DON'T HAVE TO TELL YOU, THIS COUNTRY IS IN
14:49WINTER'S ICY GRIP AND THE BIG FREEZE ISN'T OVER YET.
14:53173 MILLION AMERICANS ARE UNDER EXTREME COLD WARNINGS.
14:57NOW EXTREME COLD WARNINGS ARE LIKE REGULAR COLD WARNINGS,
15:00EXCEPT THEY COME IN BAHA BLAST.
15:03TEMPERATURES HAVE BEEN SO FRIDGID IN GEORGIA THAT TREES ARE EXPLODING.
15:08TAKE A LOOK.
15:10YOU CAN READ ALL ABOUT IT IN THE CHILDREN'S BOOK,
15:16THE GIVING TREE 2.
15:18YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE SAD BEFORE, THIS TIME, IT EXPLODES.
15:26BUT I'D LIKE TO ADDRESS THESE TREES DIRECTLY.
15:30TREES, LISTEN UP.
15:32MAYBE YOU WOULDN'T EXPLODE IF YOU JUST LET OUT YOUR FEELINGS EVERY SO
15:35OFTEN.
15:36LIKE THE WEEPING WILLOWS, THEY CRY AND EXPRESS THEMSELVES.
15:39THEY DON'T EXPLODE AT THANKSGIVING DINNER 15 YEARS FROM NOW
15:42WHEN SOMEONE JUST CASUALLY MENTIONS THE MASHED POTATOES WERE A LITTLE GUMMY.
15:46THIS HISTORIC COLD MEANS THERE'S NEVER BEEN A MORE CRUCIAL TIME
15:49TO HEAR FROM AMERICA'S FOREMOST METEOROLOGIST, PUNXUTONI PHIL.
15:54EVERY YEAR ON FEBRUARY 2ND, CHECK YOUR CALENDARS TO SEE WHEN THAT IS IN YOUR AREA,
16:00HE FORECASTS THE NEXT SIX WEEKS OF WEATHER FOR...
16:05THE ENTIRE WORLD?
16:07I DON'T KNOW.
16:09WESTERN PENNSYLVANIA?
16:10IT'S UNCLEAR AT THIS POINT.
16:11WHATEVER.
16:12AMERICA'S MAGICAL WEATHER PREDICTING RODENT IS NOW UNDER THREAT
16:15BECAUSE PETA WANTS TO REPLACE PUNXUTONI PHIL WITH A HOLOGRAM.
16:22STOP IT.
16:23STOP BEING PARTY POOPERS, PETA.
16:26FOR 139 YEARS, AMERICA'S RELYED ON A WEATHER PREDICTION SYSTEM WHERE TOWNSPEOPLE GET TANKED AT LOCAL BARS,
16:33THEN GATHER IN LARGE NUMBERS TO HARASS A SPECIALLY SELECTED GROUND VERMIN,
16:38AND BASED ON THE DIRECTION IT RUNS IN TERROR, DECIDE WHETHER WE'RE GETTING SIX MORE WEEKS OF TREES BLOWING UP.
16:44OKAY, IT'S CALLED SCIENCE.
16:47ALSO, THIS EVENT IS THE ONLY THING PROPPING UP OUR NATIONAL TOP HAT INDUSTRY.
16:52IF PUNXUTONI PHIL GOES, ALL WE'VE GOT LEFT IS PUNXUTONI SLASH.
16:58PETA SENT A LETTER REQUESTING THAT PHIL BE REPLACED WITH WHAT THEY CALL A DAZZLING 3-D PROJECTION,
17:04SO THAT PHIL AND HIS FAMILY CAN RETIRE TO A REPUTABLE SANCTUARY.
17:09ANY CHANCE THAT REPUTABLE SANCTUARY IS A FARM-UP STATE?
17:17RUN, PHIL.
17:21OF COURSE, REPLACING METEOROLOGISTS WITH OPTICAL ILLUSIONS IS NOTHING NEW.
17:25WE ALL REMEMBER THE SUCCESS THE TODAY SHOW FOUND WHEN THEY REPLACED AL ROKER WITH A MAGIC-EYE POSTER.
17:31BUT YOU KNOW WHAT? I'LL BITE, Y'ALL.
17:34LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT THESE TWO AI-GENERATED PHILS.
17:37ONE FOR SIX MORE WEEKS OF WINTER THAT LOOKS LIKE PHIL IS HAUNTING US FROM HIS REPUTABLE SANCTUARY.
17:44AND ANOTHER FOR EARLY SPRING THAT LOOKS LIKE HE MOVED FROM GOBLER'S NOB TO GOBLER'S COACHELLA.
17:51AND THERE'S ANOTHER WINTER HOLIDAY ON THE HORIZON FOR ALL Y'ALL.
17:55FOR MANY ASIAN CULTURES, LUNAR NEW YEAR IS THIS FEBRUARY 17TH.
17:59IN CHINESE ASTROLOGY, THIS YEAR IS THE YEAR OF THE HORSE, BUT NOT ANY OLD HORSE.
18:04ACCORDING TO THE CHINESE CALENDAR, 2026 IS THE YEAR OF THE FIRE HORSE.
18:09OR, AS THEY SAY IN CHINESE, FIRE HORSE!
18:17I DON'T, I DON'T ACTUALLY, I DON'T, I'M PRETTY SURE THAT'S NOT CHINESE.
18:23BUT I GOT TO SAY THAT IS METAL AS HELL, ALMOST AS METAL AS 1990, WHICH WAS THE YEAR OF THE METAL HORSE.
18:30OR, AS THEY SAY IN CHINESE, METAL HORSE!
18:36AGAIN, CHINESE IS NOT ENGLISH THAT YOU YELL.
18:40THE HOT TOY THIS LUNAR NEW YEAR IN CHINA IS A NEW STUFFED ANIMAL.
18:44THEY'RE CALLING IT THE ACCIDENTAL CRYING HORSE TOY.
18:48THAT LITTLE GUY RIGHT THERE IS THE PERFECT SYMBOL FOR HOW IT FEELS IN 2026.
18:52WE'RE SAD AND WE'RE SOFT, BUT WE'RE STILL HOPING WE CAN SLEEP WITH YOU.
19:00AND APPARENTLY, APPARENTLY THE HORSE WASN'T SUPPOSED TO BE FROWNING.
19:04A SHOPWORKER ACCIDENTALLY SEWED THE HORSE'S SMILE UPSIDE DOWN.
19:08WELL, IT TURNS OUT EVERYBODY LOVES IT.
19:10THE SAD HORSE WENT VIRAL ON SOCIAL MEDIA, AND THE SHOP DECIDED TO PRODUCE MORE OF THE DEFECTIVE TOY.
19:16YES, JUST LIKE WE, JUST LIKE WE LOVE PUNXXXXXXY PHILL,
19:20CHINA LOVES EMOTIONALLY TROUBLED HORSES.
19:23OR AS THEY SAY IN CHINESE...
19:25EMOTIONALLY TROUBLED HORSE!
19:29We'll be right back with Sam Rockwell, everybody.
19:50Welcome back, my friends.
19:54Thank you very much.
19:57Ladies and gentlemen, my first guest tonight is an Academy Award-winning actor you know
20:03from Galaxy Quest, Three Billboards, Outside Ebbing, Missouri, and The Bad Guys.
20:08He now stars in the film.
20:09Good luck.
20:10Have fun.
20:11Don't die.
20:13I have experienced this night over and over again, each time with a different combination
20:17of people in this diner.
20:19And every time we have failed, I have held some of you in my arms and watched the very
20:24life flicker from your eyes.
20:26Some of you, I even consider family.
20:29I've done this so many times, I know some of you better than you know yourselves.
20:35Hey, Nancy Delaney and Charles Roberts.
20:37You're on your first date.
20:39Charles thought Norm's was the right call.
20:42Nancy's been planning our exit for 20 minutes.
20:44Neither one of you have ever joined my revolution and made it out of the steiner alive.
20:48Excuse me.
20:50You!
20:51No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
20:55You are the least useful person I've ever met.
20:5729 times you've raised your hand to join my revolution.
21:0029 times.
21:02You've been an albatross around my neck.
21:04You've got a bad knee, Gerald.
21:05Figure it out.
21:06Please welcome back to The Late Show, Sam Rockwell.
21:10Get up on that thing and dance when you feel better.
21:15Get up on that thing and try to reduce that pressure.
21:19Get up on that thing and dance when you feel better.
21:23Get up on that thing.
21:24I admire a guest who hydrates right away.
21:38Good for you.
21:40Are there electrolytes in here?
21:41What?
21:42Are there electrolytes in here?
21:44That's what you call it.
21:45Hey, hello.
21:46There you go.
21:48It's always nice.
21:49I always enjoy talking to you.
21:50It's nice to have a New Yorker stop by.
21:52You spend a lot of time, especially.
21:54Yeah, right?
21:54I understand early part of your career,
21:56but also your childhood.
21:57This was like New York was like summer camp for you.
21:58That's right, yeah.
21:59How was it?
21:59You came out here?
22:01I came out here in the summertime to visit my mom,
22:03and I started doing theater with my mom.
22:05Oh, that's nice.
22:06She was an actress?
22:07She was an actress, and my dad was for a little bit.
22:09Yeah.
22:10Yeah, and then he became sort of a political guy a little bit.
22:14It was sort of union organizing and stuff like that.
22:18That's cool.
22:19Yeah.
22:19And so when did you decide to come back here
22:22and make it a permanent thing for you?
22:23I just decided when I was 18 to come out and try it out,
22:26you know, and...
22:27Wow, what's...
22:28Okay, so an 18-year-old trying to make it as an actor
22:30in New York, were you not overwhelmed by New York at all?
22:33When I was 21, I came out here to audition.
22:35What did you do?
22:36Where'd you audition?
22:37Oh, I auditioned for NYU for the graduate program.
22:40Oh, NYU.
22:40Graduate program.
22:41I came and I, I mean...
22:43Did you get in?
22:44I got in, but I didn't come because New York freaked me out.
22:46Was it the classical department?
22:48Was it the experimental theater wing, or was it...
22:51I don't know, man.
22:52Oh, you didn't come?
22:53No, I didn't come.
22:54I, I, I declined their kind offer.
22:57Why?
22:57How come?
22:58Because New York freaked me out.
22:59No, no, it was great.
23:01I was walking through Chinatown and someone like a cop car
23:04went on the sidewalk in front of me.
23:06They grabbed a guy, threw him on the hood,
23:08cuffed him and dragged him away.
23:09And that was it for you?
23:10I'm not moving here.
23:12And that was probably just an episode of NYPD Blue or something.
23:15It could have been.
23:15Okay, my understanding is that you, you, you did the rite of passage
23:20for every young actor.
23:22I did.
23:23You did Law and Order?
23:25Twice.
23:25Twice.
23:26Okay.
23:26Here, we got, we got a couple, we got a couple of these.
23:29Pictures.
23:30Here's, here's one.
23:32Oh, yeah, man.
23:33Are you a good guy here?
23:33You're a cop?
23:34I'm just...
23:35Obviously a scumbag.
23:39Yes.
23:40Like a bad cop.
23:41You were a bad cop?
23:42A bad cop, yeah.
23:43And who's this guy?
23:44Is this a bad preppy or something?
23:46Yeah, that's a, that's a bad, that's a longshoreman who went preppy.
23:51Really?
23:52Were you ever the killer?
23:54I was the killer.
23:55I was the killer, too.
23:56You were?
23:57Yeah.
23:57On Law and Order?
23:58Yeah, Law and Order Criminal Intent.
23:59Oh, yeah.
24:00How did you kill people?
24:01I, do you remember how you killed your victim?
24:04You know, I don't.
24:05How did you kill your victim?
24:06With a lie bomb in the mail.
24:08Whoa, whoa.
24:10We have to take a quick break.
24:11Hold that thought.
24:13We'll be right back with more of Sam Rockwell, everybody.
24:22We're ready.
24:23We're ready.
24:24We're ready.
24:24We're ready.
24:25We're ready.
24:26The Billboard Extended Universe.
24:28You're going to see Father Jim next week.
24:30Oh, yeah, hold on.
24:30Hey, friends, look at this.
24:32We're back with Sam Rockwell, star of Good Luck, Have Fun, Don't Die.
24:37Okay, the new film, we saw the little clip.
24:40I'm very happy to be here with you.
24:42I just want to.
24:42Oh, I'm so happy to have you here.
24:44I'm very, very happy to be here.
24:44I'm very, very happy to be here.
24:44I'm very, very happy to be here.
24:46Very, very happy.
24:47I'm a big fan.
24:48I'm very happy.
24:50You play a guy from the future who travels back in time to recruit a team.
24:54Yes, indeed.
24:54To prevent an AI apocalypse.
24:57Yes, that's right.
24:58Okay.
24:58That's right.
24:59And he's the least qualified guy for the job.
25:01He's at the bottom of the list.
25:03Has everyone else been tried?
25:05Is that what's going on?
25:06Don't give away the whole lot.
25:06Well, Christopher Lloyd, you know, I don't know.
25:08Okay, that's nice.
25:09Who else?
25:09Christopher Lloyd's in it?
25:10Brad Pitt in six, 12 months.
25:11I thought you meant it.
25:12Christopher Lloyd was in it.
25:13The character, Doc.
25:15Doc is in it.
25:15Doc, yeah, yeah.
25:16That would be a great crossover.
25:16That would be a great crossover.
25:17Yeah.
25:18We were channeling a lot of that stuff.
25:20Yes.
25:21It hits theaters February 13th.
25:23Is this a, um, this is Valentine's weekend.
25:27That's right.
25:27Is it a first date movie?
25:29It could be.
25:32Is it, Stanley, ask you this, is it a last date movie?
25:34It might be.
25:36You don't know.
25:36Is it a date movie?
25:37It's a very good date movie.
25:39Very good date movie.
25:40Do you have a favorite date movie?
25:41Do you have a date movie of technically, like, that's a good date movie?
25:43Saving Silverman?
25:44I don't know.
25:45What about that one?
25:45Yeah, that was okay.
25:46That's a good movie.
25:46Yeah, yeah, yeah.
25:47Um, uh, Dr. Zhivago.
25:50Dr. Zhivago?
25:51Uh, Sophie's Choice.
25:51That's a long date movie.
25:54Sophie's Choice.
25:55Oh, my God.
25:57That's a last date movie, right?
25:58That's a last date movie, exactly.
26:00Hey, speaking of sci-fi, I got some lunch back here.
26:03What are you grabbing my leg?
26:04What are you doing?
26:04There's something back here.
26:06Are you looking, that, is that, do you want that?
26:08Oh, that's what it is.
26:09Yeah, yeah, yeah.
26:09I have not been, I was told that was there and not told what it is.
26:12Leftover lunch, I got you.
26:13What did you get me?
26:14Yeah.
26:14Is this for me, for real?
26:16This is for you, yeah, yeah.
26:17This is...
26:17I watched one of your episodes this week.
26:20Oh, you got me.
26:22Coopler.
26:23You got me an action figure?
26:25Yeah, it opens up, look.
26:26From the thing, for Steven, for those dark nights, love, Sammy, and Childs.
26:37Okay, this is the thing.
26:39I actually work with Keith Davis.
26:39This is the thing.
26:41This is, this is Mac.
26:43That's Kurt Russell's character.
26:44Kurt Russell's character, MacReady.
26:46Mac.
26:46It's a big deal.
26:47Mac, and look at all the different heads he comes with.
26:51He comes with all these different heads.
26:53He's got whiskey, too, yeah.
26:54He's got whiskey, yeah, it's scotch.
26:55It's a J.B. Scotch, if you, if you know.
26:58And he's got different hand.
26:59He's got, like, kung fu grip and everything.
27:01Yeah, yeah.
27:01This is fantastic.
27:02It's great, isn't it?
27:03I'm a fan of the thing, too.
27:04I'm a huge...
27:05Oh, it is my favorite.
27:06It is my comfort movie.
27:07Me, too.
27:08Me, too.
27:08I took my mother to see it in the theater.
27:11This is lovely.
27:11Of course, of course.
27:12A little hint to the other guests who come on the show.
27:15There you go.
27:16And is it, was it, what is this, Childs, was the thing?
27:20Okay, for those of you who may not know, at the end of the thing, as the camp is burning
27:24down around them, as they've tried to kill the thing, spoiler, the thing, which can assume
27:28any sort of living form that it wants, it might be Childs, who's played by Keith David.
27:34Yeah.
27:35Or it might be Mac, who's played by Kurt Russell.
27:38But how are we supposed to know that from that scene?
27:40I don't know, but I asked John Carpenter.
27:42I said, is there an answer?
27:45Is Childs the thing?
27:46Which is a little question.
27:46He goes, there is an answer.
27:47And I said, I don't want to know what it is.
27:49And I said, but I just don't want to know that if I watch the film, can I know what that
27:52answer is just by watching?
27:53And he said, yes.
27:54And I asked Kurt Russell.
27:55I told Kurt Russell that story out of the Emmys.
27:57How do we know?
27:58And he said, bull****.
28:01You can't know.
28:02And I said, Carpenter says you know.
28:04Typical Kurt.
28:05Yeah.
28:05Typical.
28:06Yeah, classic Kurt.
28:06Have you worked with him?
28:07No, I haven't.
28:08I had a chance.
28:09I really, you know, I wish.
28:10You had a chance and you blew it?
28:11Yeah, I blew it.
28:12I worship Kurt Russell, yeah.
28:13Of course.
28:13In fact, when I got together with Gore Verbinski the first time, I tried, I was playing this
28:19character, almost a little like Kurt Russell.
28:21I was trying to do like a Kurt Russell cool thing.
28:23And he said, no, no, too cool.
28:24Too cool.
28:25We got to go more like, you know, Christopher Lloyd, Robin Williams, Fisher King.
28:30And he was right.
28:31It was a pivotal moment for the.
28:33Sure, because you get a sense of what the post-apocalyptic future is like.
28:37Yes.
28:37By looking at you.
28:38Absolutely.
28:39Right.
28:39You look at that character and go like, I want no part of that.
28:42That's right.
28:43Do you like time travel movies?
28:45I love time travel movies.
28:46Yeah, yeah, yeah.
28:46Yeah, I'm very fascinated by time travel movies.
28:48Time After Time.
28:48Sure.
28:49Oh, that's a really good one.
28:51Yeah, yeah, exactly.
28:52That's the same guy who directed.
28:55Yeah.
28:56Star Trek 2.
28:58Oh, is that right?
28:59Yeah, yeah, yeah.
28:59Wrath of Khan?
29:00With Wrath of Khan.
29:00He did Wrath of Khan, too.
29:02No kidding.
29:02Yeah.
29:02Yeah, David Warner's in that.
29:04Plays Jack the Ripper.
29:04Great.
29:05Yep.
29:05And then, you know, obviously Back to the Future and 12 Monkeys.
29:09Yeah.
29:10What else?
29:10Almost none of them work, though.
29:12Okay, so tell me about, you're a cynic about that.
29:14I'm not a cynic.
29:16I just have...
29:17You're a scientist.
29:19I just have my ears on, you know what I mean?
29:21Like, I keep my head on a swivel.
29:23I watch my six on that one.
29:24Poke some holes.
29:25Oh, there's almost...
29:26Back to the Future.
29:26I can't...
29:28There's no time travel movie works.
29:31There are conflicts.
29:32It's the only one, the closest one, in my opinion.
29:34Okay.
29:34I should really do a podcast about this.
29:36I should do a podcast called About Time, where I just have people come on and argue with
29:40me that some time travel movie works, and I spend the entire thing arguing with them
29:44that it doesn't work.
29:45What's...
29:45You should, actually.
29:46The one that works closest...
29:47The one that works closest, because it could run for years.
29:50There's so many of them.
29:51I think the Time Turner from Harry Potter comes closest.
29:56Hermione's Time Turner comes...
29:57You haven't seen it?
29:58I did not see that.
29:58No.
29:59They're quality films.
30:00Is that a prequel?
30:01What?
30:01Is that a prequel?
30:02No, that's a...
30:03That's a Harry Potter...
30:04That's one of the Harry Potters.
30:05Are you familiar with the Harry Potter series of instructional videos?
30:09Have you not seen those?
30:10Have you not read any of them?
30:12I haven't.
30:12And you haven't seen any of them?
30:13I haven't seen any of them.
30:14And you call yourself a human?
30:17How could you not have seen them?
30:19Just by accident, on a fucking train, Sam?
30:21We were getting along.
30:22We were talking about the thing.
30:23We're still getting along.
30:24You don't fight with your friends.
30:25Jesus, this is going south.
30:26You never fight with your friends.
30:27It's fun to fight with friends, isn't it?
30:30It is fun.
30:30One of my favorite stories.
30:31Shut up.
30:31One of my favorite stories.
30:36One of my favorite stories of any actress ever.
30:38You ever heard about Ralph...
30:40I think it was Ralph Richardson and Alec Guinness.
30:45Because they were both like Ealing...
30:46No, they were just like on...
30:48They were like at the...
30:49Probably Pinewood Studios or something like that.
30:52And then they were like studio actors
30:53and they each had offices and everything.
30:55And Ralph Richardson walks into Alec Guinness' office.
30:59And Alec Guinness stands up to greet his friend
31:01and Richardson clocks him.
31:03Why?
31:04Down he goes.
31:05And Alec Guinness goes,
31:05Why didn't you punch me?
31:07And he had an argument with the director.
31:10And he goes,
31:10And I couldn't punch him.
31:12And I had to punch someone.
31:13And he said,
31:14And if you can't punch your best friend,
31:16who can you punch?
31:19So I'm just saying, Sam.
31:20Some truth to that.
31:24I hear you, man.
31:26Good luck.
31:26Have fun.
31:27Don't die.
31:27We'll be right back with George Saunders.
31:34We'll be right back with George Saunders.
31:48Welcome back, everybody.
31:49Ladies and gentlemen.
31:54Folks of all ages,
31:56my next guest is the number one New York Times best-selling Booker Prize
32:01and National Book Award-winning author of 13 books.
32:04His latest is Vigil.
32:06Please welcome back to The Late Show, George Saunders.
32:09Hey, George.
32:25Welcome back.
32:26It's so nice to be here.
32:27This picture right here,
32:29I want to have this in my mind forever.
32:31Oh, yeah.
32:32I'll take it.
32:33I wouldn't mind having this one in my mind forever, either.
32:35You know, I think this is the fourth time I've been on here,
32:38fifth time, maybe,
32:38and I want to say one thing.
32:40You come here nervous, of course.
32:42I do.
32:42A writer does, because of what.
32:43And the people that you have on your show,
32:46from the producers,
32:46all the technical people,
32:47so sweet-hearted,
32:48and it just makes it such a beautiful experience.
32:51And I know it comes from the top down,
32:52so thank you for that.
32:53Well, that's lovely to say.
32:55And I completely agree.
32:56Incredibly lucky to work with this amazing group of people.
33:01Congratulations.
33:01And in November,
33:03you were awarded the National Book Foundation's,
33:05I'm going to get this right,
33:06Lifetime Achievement Prize.
33:08It's your writing gives me so much,
33:11gives the world so much.
33:12What does writing give you?
33:15Well, you know,
33:16my process is really revision-heavy.
33:19Revision-heavy?
33:20Yeah, I'm doing it over and over,
33:21day after day.
33:22And in that process,
33:23what works for me is
33:25to imagine the reader
33:27as being kind of better than me,
33:28like smarter and more worldly
33:31and more compassionate and funnier.
33:33So you're always kind of writing up to that person.
33:35So that's a revision strategy.
33:37You read something and go,
33:38ooh, that's kind of dull.
33:39She won't like that.
33:40You know what I mean?
33:41And so over the years of doing that,
33:43what will happen is
33:45a better version of me
33:46will appear on the page,
33:47which is so refreshing,
33:49you know?
33:50I mean, I'm not the usual dummy.
33:53Does that make you want to sort of edit
33:55everything you say and do in your life?
33:57Yes.
33:57If you know that given another day,
33:58you can do it better?
33:59Yeah, 100%.
33:59Can we do it again?
34:00Sure, you can even answer that question
34:02differently if you'd like right now.
34:03And so what happens is
34:05I'm over here trying to be my best self
34:07and hopefully the reader feels that
34:09and then we both kind of come out
34:11of the usual kind of habitual self
34:13and have that little moment of
34:14kind of like high-level union,
34:16you know, so that's really beautiful
34:18and addictive.
34:19Right now for a lot of people
34:21is a time of enormous stress
34:22and turmoil.
34:24And I'm just curious what you think
34:26the role of art is
34:29in times of growing darkness.
34:31It's, you know,
34:32a lot of writers are worried about this.
34:34And I think sometimes you feel like
34:36you're doing kind of painting the baseboards
34:38and then the ceiling comes down.
34:40You know, it can feel like that.
34:41But for me,
34:43okay, so I want the reader to feel
34:46that I'm there with her.
34:48The way you do that is in revision,
34:49you try to get in touch
34:50with some truth that you share.
34:52So I think now,
34:53it's not a huge thing,
34:55but it's not nothing.
34:56We can look at a text
34:57and by doing that,
34:59we can recalibrate our relation to truth.
35:02Because this administration
35:03seems to be working at a task
35:05of lying so often
35:07that we get used to it.
35:11It's like if you're
35:11in a really fancy restaurant
35:12and the waiter brings in
35:13three turds on a tray.
35:15You know?
35:17But under a silver dome.
35:19Yes.
35:20Yeah.
35:20And so in that point,
35:21I mean, basic sanity
35:22is to say,
35:23waiter,
35:24you know,
35:25let's take this away.
35:26But the idea is
35:27if you keep bringing
35:27the turds on a tray,
35:30then like,
35:30okay, leave it.
35:31I'll get used to it.
35:32Bring me a fork, you know?
35:33Everyone else seems
35:34to be enjoying it.
35:35Yeah, right.
35:36Maybe I'm crazy.
35:37Right.
35:38No, I think that's true.
35:39So in a small way,
35:40I feel like things
35:41are so confusing
35:42and so sad
35:43and so cruel,
35:44this ambient cruelty.
35:46So for a couple minutes a day,
35:48I'm like,
35:48yeah,
35:49I don't know what I can do,
35:50but I can just recalibrate
35:51my relation to truth.
35:52What's the role of fiction
35:53in times like this?
35:54I'm curious.
35:55Because some people,
35:57I don't necessarily agree.
35:59Some people say,
36:01well,
36:01fiction is not good
36:02in a time like this
36:03because it's a form of escapism.
36:04What do you think about that?
36:05Well,
36:06my experience of fiction is
36:07it frees up everything.
36:09You don't have to be accurate
36:10to anything
36:11except the soul,
36:12essentially,
36:13you know?
36:13So in that sense,
36:15it's so free
36:18and I think that in itself
36:19is really powerful.
36:20And I have the feeling
36:22that with fiction,
36:24a writer can reach out
36:26and even if the person
36:27is very different from you,
36:29you can hit something essential.
36:31I talked to a couple
36:32somewhere in my travels
36:33and they were like mediation people.
36:36They were divorces
36:37or corporate problems and stuff
36:38and they said
36:39in the most difficult cases,
36:42what they would do
36:42is take a Chekhov story
36:43and ask the different parties
36:46to read it
36:46and they said
36:47it was so amazing
36:48because whatever
36:49the real problem was,
36:50they didn't need
36:51to talk about that.
36:52They were talking about
36:52these imaginary people
36:53in a story
36:54and in the process,
36:56they said
36:57people would become
36:58weirdly vulnerable.
36:59They would confess things
37:00that in the defensive mode
37:01they wouldn't confess.
37:03So I think that's,
37:05you know,
37:05from the time we're little,
37:07our parents are telling us
37:09a story
37:09and we're trying to make sense
37:10of the universe
37:11through made up things
37:12which somehow frees us
37:13from the constraint
37:14of the kind of everyday
37:15and the habitual,
37:16I think.
37:16So like in fiction,
37:18you and I can speak
37:19at each other
37:19but if we're,
37:22let's say if we're both
37:23reading the same book,
37:24for instance,
37:24let's say we were all
37:25reading Vigil.
37:26Let's say that.
37:27And also I think
37:28it's good to read two
37:31or buy two or three copies.
37:32Exactly.
37:33Obviously buy two
37:34or three copies
37:34so you have one
37:35everywhere you go
37:36and like that.
37:37But then we're side by side
37:39like facing the story
37:40together
37:41and experiencing
37:42in a similar way
37:43which is one of the reasons
37:44why even though
37:45you've won the Booker Prize
37:46and you've won
37:46the National Book Award
37:47right now I'm about
37:48to bestow on you
37:48the highest prize
37:50any book could possibly get
37:52because I'm excited
37:52to announce
37:53that Vigil will be
37:55the Late Show Book Club's
37:57February pick
37:58and it comes with
37:59we're all going to read
38:00we're all going to read Vigil.
38:02There you go.
38:03And it comes with a mug
38:05which I don't think
38:05the Booker Prize comes with
38:07and it comes with a bookmark.
38:09That's for you.
38:09You get to keep that.
38:10I appreciate it very much.
38:12All right, there you go.
38:14Yeah, yeah.
38:15You can leave it right there.
38:18Now, I love
38:19Lincoln and the Bardo.
38:20It also deals with
38:22death and the afterlife.
38:24This does as well.
38:26Did you mean to write
38:28about ghosts
38:29or the afterlife again
38:30or do you start writing
38:31and a ghost just
38:32wafts into the room?
38:33It's more like that.
38:34Really?
38:35Yeah, I mean,
38:35I think the writer
38:36is basically
38:38like a roller coaster designer.
38:39So at the beginning
38:40I don't think
38:41you should know
38:42what you're trying to do
38:43but you're trying
38:44to thrill the reader
38:45somehow or another.
38:46And I think you love
38:48Flannery O'Connor.
38:48I do love Flannery O'Connor.
38:49Yeah, I do too.
38:49And she said
38:50a really amazing thing.
38:51She said,
38:52a writer can choose
38:53what he writes
38:54but he can't choose
38:55what he makes live.
38:56So what that means
38:57is you might have the idea
38:58I'm this kind of writer
38:59but if you do it
39:00but if you do it
39:00and it's boring
39:01you're not that kind of writer.
39:03So if you think
39:04you're going to be
39:04like a string quartet writer
39:06like Shostakovich
39:07and you write one
39:08and everybody falls asleep
39:09that's not it.
39:11But if you start
39:12playing a polka
39:12and they dance
39:13then you're good.
39:14So for me
39:15if I have a realistic story
39:17like with a couple
39:18having a serious discussion
39:19about their marriage
39:20I just like
39:21ugh
39:21I can't do it.
39:23but if I let her
39:24dead mom drift in
39:25you know
39:26and also
39:28the dead mom
39:29doesn't like the husband
39:30then I'm in heaven.
39:32George, thank you so much
39:33for being here.
39:33Thank you so much.
39:34Such a pleasure.
39:37Vigil is available now
39:38and it's a late show
39:40February book club pick.
39:41Go get it.
39:42George Saunders everybody
39:43we'll be right back.
39:53That's it for the late show
40:00everybody.
40:01Tune in tomorrow
40:01my guests will be
40:02Bad Bunny
40:03and Catherine Lanasa.
40:05Good night.
40:23Good night.
40:35Good night.
40:36Good night.
40:37Good night.
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