- 2 days ago
tennis legend Bobby Riggs was a memorable 1974 TV special, featuring Martin as host and Riggs as the roastee
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00:00The Dean Martin Celebrity Roast, coming to you from the MGM Grand Hotel in the entertainment capital of the world, Las Vegas, Nevada.
00:23Ladies and gentlemen, from the beautiful Siegfeld Room, tonight's star-studded roast has brought together some of the world's greatest entertainers.
00:33They've come from all over the world to be here tonight, here in Las Vegas, in person.
00:41The Man of the Week!
00:44Your Roastmaster, Dean Martin!
00:47And tonight's very special Man of the Week, Mr. Bobby Riggs!
00:54In the past, we saluted some great athletes, so tonight we thought we'd salute Bobby Riggs for a change of pace.
01:25Bobby, for a 55-year-old man, you're in great shape, unless you plan on living.
01:33It's too bad Bobby didn't win that match with Billie Jean King, it's just that Bobby ran out of wind too fast.
01:40I didn't think that was possible Bobby running out of wind, it's like Nixon running out of excuses.
01:46As you know, Bobby played Billie Jean in the Houston Astrodome.
01:58It was the only place big enough to fit Bobby's head.
02:01Oh, what a character.
02:04Bobby's been known to play an entire game of tennis with a suitcase in one hand.
02:10He has to, when he loses, he has to get out of town fast.
02:13One time he actually played a tennis match wearing a dress.
02:18He lost the match, but on the way home he picked up three sailors.
02:22Tennis isn't the only thing he excelled in.
02:29In college, he was on the tug-of-war team, he was the third jerk from the end.
02:33Yeah, Bobby's made a lot of money in this business.
02:40When he was 15 years old, he won his first purse and bought a dress to match.
02:45It's a real pleasure now to have Vincent Price with us tonight,
02:50a man who's appeared in such great films as Dr. Goldfoot.
02:56And the Bikini Machine.
02:59And the Ghost in the Invisible Bikini.
03:02Those pictures were so bad, they removed his star from the sidewalk on Hollywood Boulevard.
03:10One of Hollywood's most popular actors, Mr. Vincent Price, ladies and gentlemen.
03:24People have always told me that Bobby Riggs was a hustler.
03:28But I know for a fact that that is not so.
03:32Dean Martin himself told me that Bobby doesn't look like any hustler he knows,
03:36and he knows them all.
03:44And I'd also heard that Bobby was a male chauvinist pig.
03:48But in reality, he's very insecure when it comes to women.
03:53In fact, a few months ago, he confided to me that he was very fond of a certain girl.
03:59But he was too shy to approach her.
04:01And he asked me if I'd help him write a love letter.
04:04I told him I'd be more than happy to do so.
04:06But what we did was this.
04:09I wrote a first draft, and then Bobby took it and revised it slightly, giving it his own personal touch.
04:17Now, this is the first draft that I wrote, and this is Bobby's revised version.
04:23I hope Bobby won't mind if I read a few passages from them.
04:26In my version, I start off by saying,
04:29Oh, sweet nymph of my thousand fantasies,
04:33have you ever felt a volcano of passion within your soul,
04:36erupting in a fiery flow of desire impossible to restrain?
04:40In Bobby's version, he changed that passage lightly so that it reads,
04:46Hey, hot lips, do you fool around?
04:58Ladies and gentlemen,
05:01a real hall of famer, Mr. Leo DeRosa.
05:10Thanks, Dean.
05:15As for you, Riggs,
05:16get a load.
05:19Get a load of this guy.
05:21Now, what's next, Riggs?
05:23Boxing, maybe?
05:24You're going to get in the ring and punch the hell out of Hermione Gingold?
05:29Maybe you could be the new white hope
05:31against Alan Rodney Rippey.
05:37How about track, Bobby?
05:39How'd you like to go up against Lassie
05:40in a 40-yard dash to a bowl of Alpo?
05:44Hey, why don't you wrestle Tony Fields?
05:47At least you know you can't get hurt falling on a flat.
05:51Listen, I've had it with you, Riggs.
05:53I'm telling you for the last time,
05:55get yourself in gear
05:56and shape up
05:58because the next time I tell you,
06:00I won't be such a nice guy.
06:08She belongs on the wide world of talent.
06:13Ladies and gentlemen,
06:14the pride of the South,
06:15Miss Lynn Anderson.
06:25Thank you, Dean.
06:26You know, the women's live movement
06:27keeps saying that Bobby Riggs
06:28is some kind of a pig.
06:31That can't fool me, Bobby.
06:32I'm a country girl
06:35and I know an old goat
06:36when I see one.
06:43So, Bobby,
06:44Bobby is a real friendly little creature.
06:47Now, just before the show,
06:48he dropped by everybody's dressing room
06:50just to say hello.
06:51Now, as he dropped by my dressing room,
06:54I happened to be rehearsing a song
06:56into this little tape recorder
06:57and I thought that I'd leave it running
06:58just to have a little memento
07:00of Bobby's visit to me.
07:02I thought that you might like to hear
07:04just exactly what went on.
07:07Come in.
07:10Why, Mr. Riggs,
07:11how nice to see you.
07:13What can I do for you?
07:16Mr. Riggs?
07:17Why are you locking the door?
07:19Mr. Riggs?
07:20Mr. Riggs?
07:22Mr. Riggs?
07:23Mr. Riggs?
07:23Oh, Mr. Riggs.
07:28How cute.
07:32Listen,
07:33thanks again, Bobby,
07:35for showing me your little pet mouth.
07:36That was awesome.
07:48We're very happy tonight
07:49to have Wayne Newton with us.
07:52A great singer of song,
07:56Mr. Wayne Newton.
07:58Thank you very much.
08:08And, Dean,
08:08I really can't tell you
08:09what a great thrill it is
08:10to be doing your show tonight.
08:12And contrary to what you might think,
08:15Dean is really a great guy.
08:16He's really the kind of guy
08:18that would give you
08:18the floor off his back.
08:23And, Dean,
08:23don't worry,
08:24I'm going to call you tomorrow
08:25and tell you what a great time
08:26you had tonight.
08:32And you don't know
08:33what a thrill for this
08:34it is for me personally
08:35to see Mr. Leo DeRocha
08:37sitting over there.
08:38I'm a great fan,
08:39by the way,
08:40and he really has done
08:42great things,
08:43ladies and gentlemen,
08:43for baseball.
08:45He left it.
08:45And now to our guest of honor.
08:54What do you say,
08:55what do you really say
08:56about a guy who runs around
08:57in short pants
08:58and a buster brown haircut
09:00and likes to call himself Bobby?
09:07Bobby,
09:07during World War II,
09:08I happen to know
09:09that an Italian girl
09:10hid you out in her basement
09:11for nine months
09:13in Cleveland.
09:17We, uh,
09:18Billie Jean King
09:19did want to be here tonight,
09:20Robert,
09:21but she couldn't make it
09:22and she did send a telegram
09:23and it started out,
09:25Dear Pig.
09:28And then it gets insulting
09:29from there,
09:30so I think we should
09:32really read it.
09:33And Bobby,
09:34I want you to know
09:34that all the men
09:35in this country,
09:36all of us,
09:37on this dais,
09:38in this country,
09:39we want to thank you
09:40for helping us
09:41put down woman's lip.
09:48We needed you
09:49like Christine Jorgensen
09:50needs a...
09:52Ladies and gentlemen,
10:06a great athlete
10:07and a funny man,
10:08Mr. Alex Garrett.
10:10Bobby,
10:22all of us
10:23He-Men
10:24really appreciate
10:25what you've done
10:25for us.
10:35Those of us
10:35who are legitimate athletes,
10:37we play for the love
10:48of the game, Bobby.
10:49You play for greed
10:51is what you play for.
10:53I know Bobby did
10:54what he could
10:55to prepare himself
10:56for the fiasco
10:57and the Astrodome
10:59against Billie Jean.
11:00I know that for a fact
11:02that he gave up
11:03six months
11:05of his love life
11:06prior to the match.
11:09I don't know
11:10whether it was
11:10the talking half
11:11or the dreaming half.
11:17I'll give you credit
11:17though, Bobby.
11:18You know,
11:18you've built the match
11:19up as a terrific thing.
11:20You know,
11:20really great.
11:21That was great.
11:22But what you promised
11:24and what you did,
11:24let's put it this way.
11:26You ever think
11:27about trying politics,
11:29Bobby?
11:34I understand
11:35Bobby doesn't go
11:36to football games anymore.
11:38You don't, do you?
11:38You don't go
11:39to football games anymore.
11:39You think that the guys
11:40in the huddle
11:41are talking about you.
11:43Well,
11:44let me tell you something.
11:45I know some of those guys
11:46and they are.
11:47They are talking.
11:49Bobby,
11:50I've kidded you
11:50for quite a bit tonight
11:51and I know that you're,
11:52you know,
11:52you're pretty sensitive
11:53these days and matter of fact,
11:55Dean just wrote me
11:56a little note.
11:57He said that he wants
11:59to know if I've been
12:00running around town
12:01telling everyone
12:01in Hollywood
12:02that you're a sissy.
12:04Well,
12:04I can honestly say I didn't.
12:06I don't know how
12:06in the hell
12:07they found out.
12:20Bobby,
12:20we've got a surprise
12:22for you.
12:22Now,
12:23who do you think
12:24we flew out
12:25to be on this day
12:26tonight?
12:2720-year-old classmates
12:28from high school,
12:29a man you haven't seen
12:30in 30 years.
12:32Ladies and gentlemen,
12:32let's have a warm welcome
12:34for Mr. Don Rice.
12:46Dean just told you
12:47I went to high school
12:48with Bobby Riggs,
12:50the Archie Bunker
12:50of tennis.
12:54Bobby gave the
12:55valedictorian speech
12:57to the graduating class
12:58and I remember
12:59we were all so thrilled
13:00when he explained
13:02how a royal flush
13:03beats an inside straight.
13:08And Bobby,
13:09in school,
13:10his first love
13:11was tennis
13:11and his family
13:13were poor
13:15learned for two years
13:16he played tennis
13:16without a racket.
13:22Every day I had to
13:23string his fingers
13:23together.
13:26And I know
13:27his first tennis teacher
13:28was a woman.
13:30Come to think of it,
13:31the last one
13:31to teach him a lesson.
13:32after he got out
13:42of high school
13:42he became a
13:43tennis hustler.
13:45He played one match
13:47wearing a trench coat
13:49carrying a pail of water.
13:51Another match
13:52he played
13:53with his hand
13:54tied behind his back
13:55and he played
13:56Billie Jean King
13:57with his foot
13:58in his mouth.
13:58But Bobby
14:07has shown the world
14:08that age
14:08is no barrier
14:09to tennis.
14:11It just keeps you
14:12from winning.
14:16All these
14:16world classmates
14:17still think
14:18you're the greatest
14:19tennis player
14:19in the world.
14:21But then
14:21what's 200 opinions
14:23against millions?
14:28Ladies and gentlemen
14:33an athlete
14:34and equally talented
14:35actor
14:35Mr. Chuck Conner.
14:45Thank you very much
14:46Dean.
14:46And ladies and gentlemen
14:47the jokes are almost over
14:48and I've been asked
14:49to inject a note
14:50of sobriety here
14:51and a little serious thing
14:52which is a rare change
14:53of pace
14:54for the Dean Martin show.
14:56Now a lot of people
14:56have wondered
14:57how Billie Jean King
14:59managed to beat
15:00Bobby Riggs so easily
15:02in their famous match
15:03at the Astrodome.
15:05A lot of tennis experts
15:06have suggested
15:07various reasons.
15:08Some say it's because
15:09basically
15:10her strokes
15:12were sounder
15:13than Bobby's.
15:14Some say it's because
15:15Bobby's reflexes
15:16aren't as good
15:17as they used to be.
15:19And others say
15:20it's because
15:20Billie Jean's net game
15:21was stronger
15:22than Bobby expected.
15:24Now I have to know
15:25that none of these reasons
15:26is the real reason.
15:28There's only one reason
15:30that Bobby lost
15:31to Billie Jean King.
15:33He was pregnant.
15:40Sure, why do you think
15:42he played the whole first set
15:43with his jacket on?
15:46He was trying
15:46to hide the bulge.
15:49Now remember
15:49the third set
15:50he sat down?
15:52It wasn't because
15:52he had a sore wrist.
15:54It was because
15:55he had morning sickness.
15:56I know it seems strange
16:01that a man
16:01who takes
16:02so many pills
16:03would forget
16:05the one pill
16:05that would have
16:06prevented the whole
16:07damn thing.
16:07if you saw the match
16:26between Bobby Riggs
16:27and Billie Jean King
16:28on television
16:29I'm sure you remember
16:30the lovely young lady
16:31with the big mouth
16:32who sat besides
16:34Howard Cosell
16:35and helped
16:37with the commentary.
16:38I'm talking about
16:39the very fine
16:40tennis player
16:41Rosemary Cosell.
16:42She kept
16:43needling Bobby
16:44all through the match
16:45and I do mean
16:46needling.
16:47In fact,
16:48by the time
16:48the match was over
16:49Bobby wasn't sweating
16:51he was leaking.
16:54Ladies and gentlemen
16:55Miss Rosemary Cosell.
16:57Thank you Dean.
17:07About what Chuck
17:08Connors was saying
17:09I don't know
17:10whether Bobby
17:10was pregnant or not
17:12but I just want
17:13to say one thing
17:14if he is
17:15you can be sure
17:16it's not
17:17Rosemary's baby.
17:21As Dean told you
17:22I was one of the TV
17:23commentators
17:24for the Bobby Riggs
17:25and Billie Jean match.
17:27Being a woman
17:27naturally
17:28I was rooting
17:28for Billie Jean
17:29and I guess
17:31I let it show
17:32a little bit
17:32and because of this
17:34and because of this
17:39some people
17:39got the idea
17:40that I had something
17:41against Bobby
17:43personally.
17:44Some even thought
17:45that I disliked him.
17:47Nothing could be
17:47further from the truth
17:48I assure you.
17:50I have only
17:51the greatest respect
17:52admiration
17:53and affection
17:54for this
17:55four-eyed
17:55little punk.
18:00When Bobby won
18:01the Wembley Championship
18:0235 years ago
18:03all the tennis experts
18:05said
18:05they'd never seen
18:06a player
18:07so full of
18:07competitive spirit
18:08and even today
18:10at 55
18:11Bobby is still
18:12full of it.
18:15In fact
18:16I believe
18:17that Bobby
18:17might even
18:18have beaten
18:18Billie Jean
18:19were it not
18:20for two forces
18:21in his life
18:22over which
18:22he had no control.
18:24Senility
18:25and irregularity.
18:38You may all
18:40be wondering
18:40what Jack Carter
18:42is doing here
18:43tonight.
18:43Right.
18:44But I'll tell you
18:45last week
18:47I saw a sign
18:48that said
18:48hire the handicapped.
18:50a great funny
18:54man
18:54Mr. Jack
18:55Carter.
19:04I would have been
19:05all right
19:05until Rosie
19:06Gazelle
19:06got my speech.
19:09But it's
19:10great to be here
19:11and I'm so glad
19:12you invited
19:12this
19:13mini munchkin
19:15over here.
19:16Look at this
19:17recycled Mickey
19:18Rooney sitting here.
19:19Bobby Riggs
19:20I never saw it
19:21in person
19:21and I love
19:22tennis.
19:23I always thought
19:23mixed doubles
19:24meant wife swapping.
19:27Dean doesn't know
19:28much about tennis.
19:28We play golf a lot
19:29and one day
19:30we're on a golf course
19:30and we pass by
19:31some bushes
19:31and he heard
19:32a yell
19:32Love 40.
19:33He thought
19:33it was an orgy.
19:36But he's learning
19:37now.
19:37I saw him
19:38in a bar
19:38the other night
19:38talking to a
19:39couple of pros.
19:40Bobby Riggs
19:46is he
19:48beautiful
19:49one.
19:49Look I never
19:50knew you
19:50built so cute.
19:51That's adorable.
19:53He's got the
19:53body of an
19:54Olympic champion
19:55really
19:55Kathy Rigby.
19:58Look at this
19:59mangled gnome
20:01we have over here.
20:02Look at him
20:03with the eyeglasses
20:04and that stringy
20:05hair and that
20:05stupid little body.
20:07looks like a
20:09nearsighted
20:10Johnny Mop
20:10I threw away.
20:14But I shouldn't
20:15pick on Bobby
20:16but why do I
20:17pick on him?
20:17Why?
20:18Because I hate
20:18his guts.
20:20I hate him.
20:20He disappointed
20:21me.
20:21He's an
20:21Golden champion
20:22a Davis Cup
20:23champion
20:24US Singles
20:24Open champion
20:25and he went
20:26to Houston
20:26and made
20:26an Astrodome
20:27of himself.
20:28She showed
20:37him didn't
20:38she Billie Jean
20:38on television
20:39before 40
20:40million people
20:41she beat the
20:42pants off him.
20:43Luckily with his
20:44wrinkled body
20:45nobody even
20:45looked.
20:50But Dean
20:51has gone to
20:51so much trouble
20:52really tonight
20:53to invite a lot
20:53of stars here
20:54to be for you
20:54Bobby.
20:55He asked Frank
20:56Sinatra and
20:56Pancho Gonzalez
20:57said he didn't
21:00know you
21:00and Pancho
21:00said he did.
21:04And Wayne
21:04Newton
21:05another one
21:05of my former
21:06idols.
21:07Yes I never
21:08forgot his
21:08mommy and
21:09daddy back
21:09in Oklahoma
21:10no matter
21:10how big
21:11he gets
21:11horse ranch
21:12he's got
21:12money
21:12he's got
21:13a yacht
21:13in Las Vegas
21:14never forgets
21:15his mommy
21:15always sends
21:15her a big
21:16package
21:16every week
21:17and his
21:17mother washes
21:18it irons
21:18and sends
21:18it right back.
21:23And Leo
21:24DeRocha
21:24the mouth
21:25that roared
21:25is there
21:26the angry
21:26man.
21:27He makes
21:28Don Rickles
21:28sound like
21:29somebody from
21:29the Walton
21:29family.
21:31I didn't
21:32know but
21:32Leo's a
21:33tennis fan
21:33and told me
21:34that Bobby
21:34is top
21:35seated.
21:35I didn't
21:36know you
21:36were top
21:36seated.
21:37I knew
21:37you were
21:37fertilized
21:38and already
21:38potted.
21:39I knew that.
21:43Yes sir.
21:44He's always
21:45potted,
21:45always stoned.
21:46Every night
21:46he's out in
21:46a bar drinking
21:47with broads.
21:48Got Sandra
21:48Giles on one
21:49arm, another
21:49stale broad
21:50in the other
21:50and he sits
21:51there boozing,
21:52drinking,
21:52hollering,
21:53but he always
21:53conserves his
21:54energy.
21:54You never see
21:55this creep pick
21:55up a check.
21:59But it's really
22:00a great thrill
22:01to be here.
22:01And Bobby's
22:02not finished in
22:02tennis, he was
22:03just challenged
22:03by Tony Fields.
22:05That's right,
22:05Tony's going to
22:06play him on
22:06national television
22:07and wait till you
22:08see Tony running
22:08around with that
22:09little behind and
22:10her little white
22:11fat legs when she
22:12reaches for a shot
22:13and rips those
22:14bloomers.
22:15Boy, America's
22:16going to see the
22:16wide, wide world
22:17of sports.
22:18I'll tell you
22:18that.
22:21Bobby?
22:21Bobby?
22:31Ladies and
22:32gentlemen, a lot's
22:34been said tonight
22:35about Bobby Riggs,
22:36pro and con,
22:38and now the
22:39con man gets
22:40back at
22:41pros.
22:43Here he is,
22:44our man of the
22:45week, Mr.
22:46Bobby Riggs.
22:47Thank you,
23:07Dane.
23:08I'd like to say
23:09this is a great
23:10honor, but it
23:11isn't.
23:13I've been a
23:14friend of Dane's
23:14for 15 years,
23:15and I wouldn't
23:16swap one year
23:17of it, but just
23:19make me an offer
23:20for the whole
23:2015 and see
23:21what happens.
23:23And Wayne
23:24Newton, you're
23:25really cute.
23:28Last time I saw
23:29you in Vegas,
23:30you really had
23:31me laughing.
23:33Unfortunately,
23:33you were singing
23:34at the time.
23:37And Alex
23:38Paris, you got
23:40bigger laughs
23:41when you played
23:41with the Detroit
23:42Lions than you
23:43did tonight.
23:47What a thrill
23:48to have Jack
23:48Carter here.
23:50Jack's a comedian
23:50who started at
23:51the bottom,
23:52and it's only
23:53his talent that
23:54has kept him
23:54there.
23:59And Vincent Price,
24:00what an honor to
24:01have the star of
24:02such great films
24:03as The Eggplant
24:05That Devoured
24:05South Philadelphia
24:06That picture made
24:10him what he is
24:11today, a
24:12has-been.
24:15I'm glad we
24:15have the
24:16Rocher show
24:16tonight.
24:17I must say,
24:19Leo and I have
24:20something in common.
24:21We both did
24:22equally well at
24:23the Astrodome.
24:32I'm glad
24:33Rosemary Casals
24:34is here.
24:35Rosemary and I
24:36started as
24:37hustlers together.
24:39I worked
24:40tennis course,
24:41and she worked
24:41the bars.
24:49Oh, one more
24:50thing.
24:51I'd challenge
24:52Rosemary to a
24:53tennis match,
24:54but I only
24:55play women.
24:55Oh, come on.
25:04We'll go over
25:04here.
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