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00:00E.Fontaine, ladies and gentlemen, the voice of the ship.
00:09Big Christmas smiles, everyone. Ho, ho, ho.
00:13One on our own?
00:14Oh, yeah.
00:14Just you and the talent.
00:15That would be amazing.
00:16We all need some stardust, my darling.
00:18Oh, that one's perfect, Donna.
00:20She's gonna look great on the socials.
00:23I've been a fan since I was nine years old.
00:25That's going back a bit.
00:27She was probably the headline act on The Ark.
00:30Thank you so much.
00:37Well, I'm sure you've been through it since your diagnosis.
00:39Primary, biliary, cholangitis. I know, it's a mouthful.
00:43Her liver doesn't work anymore.
00:45Why?
00:45Everyone's been so kind.
00:47Crowdfunded cruise, upgraded cabin.
00:50Dinner at the captain's table and front row seats to Eve's headline show later.
00:56We really ought to be...
00:58Yes.
00:58Can I?
01:00A group hug.
01:01Oh.
01:03Right.
01:06Hey.
01:07You do look exhausted.
01:08A lie down's gonna do you the world of good.
01:10Honestly, Bernie.
01:11Stop fussing.
01:12You still haven't taken your pills?
01:14Yeah, and listen, we need you on top form later because it's the Christmas panto and yours truly here is playing buttons.
01:19I suppose an hour wouldn't hurt.
01:22I'll catch you later for mulled wine and mince pies.
01:26You will.
01:26Bye.
01:27See you later.
01:27Colin.
01:27A word.
01:29Eve.
01:30Eve.
01:31The flowers in my dressing room have brought on my allergies.
01:34I specifically requested no lilies.
01:36All right.
01:37Well, I must have missed that on the rider.
01:39I'll speak to hospitality for you.
01:40Yeah.
01:40And I'll need a massage and a facial before this afternoon's sound check.
01:43Already booked in with Roshira.
01:45And no more famines.
01:46These cruise ship plebs will be the death of me.
01:50Do you know, she carries on like this.
01:51I swear she's going overboard.
01:53Let's wait until Christmas is over, shall we?
01:55Bring back Jack Grayling.
01:57All this forgiven.
02:03I'm going on an adventure and I got a feeling the sun's gonna shine.
02:10The sun's gonna shine.
02:12I'm in love with the ocean and I can't see you.
02:15I got a feeling I'm sailing tonight.
02:17Tonight, I'm sailing tonight.
02:19It's because of you.
02:23And I'm always a member.
02:27I'm going on an adventure and you are my mom.
02:35I'm going on an adventure and you are my mom.
02:38The Alicante Port Authority have given us permission to start our approach.
02:47We've got the wind with the tide, so with any luck, we should be on schedule.
02:53You've been out of sorts since we left Southampton.
02:57Coming to work with lead in the shoes.
03:03Christmas was always Jack's favorite time of year.
03:10Since he left the ship, no one's heard a peep from him.
03:14Well, maybe that's for the best.
03:17There's an excursion this afternoon to Santa Domenica, the Christmas pilgrimage.
03:22Where both do a little shore leave.
03:25Could go together.
03:27I still have the locks to complete.
03:30Perhaps a little festive downtime would do you the world of good.
03:37Feliz Navidad, amigos! This is Colin, your cruise director, informing all guests that the ship has now arrived in sunny Alicante.
03:45Perfect for some last-minute festive shopping.
03:49So why not grab a sombrero, crack open the carver, because the countdown to Christmas starts here.
03:54Would we like to have four more guests in today's shopping mall deal at 25% discount on...
04:01That Eve Fontaine post has gone viral.
04:04Yeah, the podcast has got quite a fun week.
04:08Yeah, when Donna first found out she needed special treatment, we set up a crowdfunding appeal.
04:12It's for a stem cell surgery out in Arizona.
04:14Bernie's always been there for me. Every step of the way.
04:17Yeah, what are best friends for, eh?
04:20How'd you melt? Fill that one up with ya?
04:24Whatever these ladies want.
04:25We're fine.
04:27I wouldn't mind a pineapple juice.
04:29It's been all over her since the start of the cruise.
04:33Didn't fancy dressing up as Santa then?
04:35Well, you know, I like to stand out from the crowd, don't I?
04:38Yeah, are you gonna pull wearing that?
04:40I'm young, free and single.
04:41Mine doesn't like this apart, has it?
04:43None.
04:44I've got you a little Christmas present.
04:46You'd love to do that.
04:47That's right.
04:49Hold that with ya.
04:51Let's see what he looks like on you, shall we?
05:03It's lovely.
05:05Beautiful.
05:06Listen, um, the lads are gonna go into town later for a few drinks, but I mean, I could swerve it.
05:09I mean, you could maybe, you know, hang out for the afternoon.
05:12She's busy today.
05:14The pilgrimage to Santa Dominica.
05:16Er, Bernie's still holding out for a Christmas miracle.
05:19Alright, well.
05:21Could change your mind.
05:27All I wanted on this cruise was a bit of fun.
05:30After everything I've been through.
05:31My money just met him and he's already buying you fancy presents.
05:34I'm just looking out for ya.
05:36You'll be late for the tour.
05:37Oh, Donna.
05:38Sorry.
05:39The sanctuary of Los Peregrinos was recently founded after a local girl, Thomasina Fernandez, was visited by the Blessed Virgin in one of the orange groves.
05:52She was entrusted to build a shrine where the sick and the injured might come to be healed.
06:09Well, they're certainly packing in the faithful.
06:14I said a prayer for you this morning.
06:24Miracles don't happen to people like me.
06:26You've got to have faith, Don.
06:28All right, all right.
06:30What happened to the pub crawl?
06:32They don't have a lads of coke about me.
06:34I thought you could do with some moral support anyway.
06:36Domini miserere nobis.
06:37Christi miserere nobis.
06:38Domini miserere nobis.
06:39Christi miserere nobis.
06:40Christi.
06:41Aude nos.
06:42Ave.
06:43Ave.
06:44Ave Maria.
06:45It's been a while since we spent any time together.
07:00Well, there's no reason we can't still be friends.
07:04As we celebrate Christmas with communion and prayer, I would like to invite the sick and
07:10indisposed to step forward for a blessing at the shrine of Our Lady.
07:19Father, we are the Lord.
07:20Father, we are the Lord.
07:21Father, we are the Lord.
07:22Father, we are the Lord.
07:23Father, we are the Lord.
07:24Father, we are the Lord.
07:25Father, we are the Lord.
07:26Father, we are the Lord.
07:27Father, we are the Lord.
07:28Father, we are the Lord.
07:29Father, we are the Lord.
07:30Father, we are the Lord.
07:31Father, we are the Lord.
07:32Father, we are the Lord.
07:33Father, we are the Lord.
07:34Father, we are the Lord.
07:35Father, we are the Lord.
07:36Father, we are the Lord.
07:37Father, we are the Lord.
07:38Father, we are the Lord.
07:39Father, we are the Lord.
07:40Father, we are the Lord.
07:41Father, we are the Lord.
07:42Father, we are the Lord.
07:43Thank you father it was lovely. It was a beautiful service. Thank you. Perhaps a small donation
07:54for the upkeep of the church. Yes. When are you going to realize she isn't interested? Don't tell you
08:01like this she. I know a chancer when I see you. Let's get it right. Don't set herself up with
08:05decent of your fellas. Put your nose right out of track. You really think she'd settle for a loser
08:09like this. She's out of your league Jason. Is everything all right? Doctors think she's
08:14going to need a transplant. Vomiting, jaundice, swollen ankles. You really fancy taking all
08:20that on yeah? Thought not. Idiot. You all right? Yeah. Frankie! You haven't seen a couple of
08:35small shepherds have you? Robes, sandals. I know what they look like Colin. Oh it's absolute
08:40carnage in Bethlehem. All the kids are high on sugar. You wanted to see me? Oh yeah. I just
08:44wanted to run through some changes to your set list. There's been a couple of festive additions.
08:48I can't cope with these last minute changes Colin. It's highly unprofessional. Eve! There
08:53you are. Richard. I was just checking that you're still on for lunch. Un chicanito where
08:58the paella is to die for. Well she'll be busy rehearsing. Lunch would be perfect if you're
09:02sure you can spare the time. Five hours shore leave and the pleasure of your delightful company.
09:07You spoil me. You know that. I know. Shall we? Let's remember who's top of the billet.
09:14Not a word.
09:25You okay? Just needed to sit down. Must have been overdoing things. All right. Well let's get you
09:32back to the ship shall we? Um I'm fine. I think I'd rather the doctor check you over
09:37if that's all right. But we'd better get a move on or we'll miss this bus. Where is Bernie?
09:43She said she wanted to see the Ignatius Chapel. I can wait with Donna. All right. Well um we'll see
09:52if we can find her. Yeah? You all right, darling? Yeah. Sure? Yeah.
09:59Excuse me. Wait.
10:03Who's here?
10:14Who's here?
10:26Excuse me.
10:28Wait.
10:29Kate.
10:30Oh, my God.
10:35My mother is a Jew.
10:52I saw a nun in the cloister just before we found the body.
10:56She was running off towards the abbey.
10:57The sisters often frequent the cloisters as they go about their daily business.
11:03Well, I just think the sooner we talk to her...
11:05Tomasina has taken a vow of silence.
11:08No one outside the company is permitted to speak to her.
11:12Tomasina, the child that saw the visions.
11:15The abbey has offered her sanctuary, a life devoted to the service of Christ.
11:22I've given the police a statement. They know how to find us.
11:25Did this woman have any family on the boat?
11:28She was traveling with her best friend, yeah.
11:31Then please, pass on my sincere condolences.
11:34I'm going to give you a thorough check-up, bearing in mind your condition.
11:48I'm feeling much better already.
11:51We've had one hell of a shock.
11:52We are going to run a few tests just to be on the safe side.
11:56I still can't believe Bernie's dead.
12:03Can you think of anyone that she's fallen out with?
12:06Anyone that might be holding a grudge?
12:09She might have rubbed a few people up the wrong way, but...
12:12Bernie had a good heart.
12:14Perhaps this isn't the time.
12:17Yeah, sure. I should get back to work.
12:20I don't want to say anything.
12:21I'd rather be on my own.
12:29She'd been gone 20 minutes and somebody attacked her and left her for dead.
12:32It doesn't make any sense.
12:34There's always a motive for murder.
12:36You just need to look for it.
12:37That's what Jack always said.
12:39Yeah, well, in case you hadn't noticed, Jack isn't here, so...
12:43Uh, what if I told you I knew where to find him?
12:46So you're telling me he's been here in Alicante the whole time?
12:55I thought it's Jack's room with the secrecy.
12:57Oh, that's just typical of Jack Grayling, isn't it?
12:59Running away is per usual.
13:01Here.
13:02Are you sure this is the right place?
13:06I'd recognize that place anywhere.
13:09Come on.
13:09I'm in love with you and then I got a feeling I'm sailing tonight.
13:19It's because of you that I'll always remember.
13:30I'm going on an adventure with you on my mind.
13:36Thank you so much, everybody.
13:37I'm going on an adventure with you on my mind.
13:39I'm going on an adventure with you on my mind.
13:43Jamil!
13:44Jack!
13:45I mean, I have missed you so much.
13:47What about me, Jack?
13:55Did you miss me?
14:06Okay.
14:07I thought you might have been dead, Jack.
14:09Instead, you've been hiding away here on some pirate ship theme bar.
14:13Look, I've been working my backside off just trying to make ends meet, Kate.
14:16Look, well, you both put a sock in it.
14:19A passenger was murdered this morning, Jack.
14:22We need your help to solve it.
14:24Oh, so that's why the pair of you are here.
14:27Well, I haven't come to kiss and make up.
14:29Okay, look, let's take a second, Jess.
14:32We can fill you in on what we know.
14:35The victim's name was Bernadette Campbell.
14:40She was on a crowdfunding cruise with her best friend, Donna Branning.
14:44They'd gone to visit the shrine at Santa Dominica.
14:47Piers and I were there when we found the body.
14:49With Piers?
14:51Look, let's just stick to the case, yeah?
14:53Any suspects?
14:54One of the nuns from the convent.
14:58I saw her running from the cloister shortly after the murder.
15:00You're seriously suggesting a nun might have killed her?
15:04Right, I know it sounds far-fetched.
15:06But we need to rule her own.
15:09We?
15:11Yes.
15:12First thing tomorrow, we go to the village and see she'll talk to us.
15:17Right, fine.
15:19But this is strictly business.
15:21Yes.
15:24No, no, no, no.
15:54This is Colin, your cruise director, a.k.a. Santa's Little Helper, and what a pack Christmas
16:20Oh. What? Jason doesn't see himself today. Well, that might be something to do with the argument he had with Bernie. You think he might have taken out the competition? I don't know. Look, why don't you speak to some of his friends today, see what you can find out. Yeah? Yeah. Good luck with Jack today. At the convent, I mean. Yeah.
16:50So, an update from sunny Arizona. And the bad news is, my stem cell treatment hasn't worked. Graph failure. Right now, I feel angry, scared, disappointed. But we keep going. We keep the faith.
17:20Wasn't sure you'd come. Well, there's still a murder to solve. Well, just as long as you don't go hit me again.
17:29I've been reading up on Bernie's best friend, Donna. That treatment she's been having in Arizona must have cost a fair bit.
17:37Well, I think she raised all the money on crowdfunding.
17:39Look, you've got every right to be mad at me.
17:47It was six months, Jack.
17:49Not a word. You didn't even reply to my messages.
17:54Let me explain.
17:57I think we should get to the convent.
17:59Good morning, senora.
18:18Would you like to speak with her hermano Tomasina?
18:22No.
18:22Great. Any more bright ideas?
18:35I just wanted to apologise. I was out of order what I said to Bernie yesterday.
18:39I can't do this right now, Jason.
18:41No, I didn't mean what I said.
18:43You can't talk to people like that.
18:45Let me make it up to you.
18:46No strings attached. You can't be on your own for Christmas, especially after everything that's happened.
18:50Well, I could do with a date for the show tonight.
18:55I didn't think you'd still be going.
18:57Well, you've promised to dedicate a song to Bernie.
19:02Well, I'll knock you around seven.
19:04Kate, when I left the ship, I lost everything.
19:30The job I loved.
19:33The girl I fell for.
19:36We could have made it well up, Jack.
19:38People do.
19:39I know, but I couldn't just sit around and count down the days till I saw you next.
19:43And watch your sail off again, it would have broken me.
19:48Jack.
19:48They warned me not to talk to you.
20:01So much for the foul silence.
20:03The woman that was killed yesterday, her name was Bernadette.
20:06I don't know anything about that.
20:08Then why did you run when I saw you in the cloister?
20:10I wanted to watch the mass of supplication.
20:16I'm not supposed to leave the convent.
20:21They keep me locked up here ever since the apparition.
20:25A martyr for Christ.
20:28Did you see anybody else in the cloister?
20:30For this is the blood of the covenant that was poured out for many for the forgiveness of sins.
20:34Please, please don't let them hurt me.
20:42This child belongs to Christ now.
20:54Tomasina told us that she was being held here against her will.
20:58Nonsense.
20:59She can leave at any time.
21:00You gave instructions to restrain her.
21:02Recently she has become volatile, the pressure of her newfound elevation.
21:09But the convent is the safest place for her.
21:13Locked up.
21:14Out of harm's way.
21:16I have taken on the role of her protector.
21:20These visions that Tomasina claims to have seen, you must have had your doubts.
21:26The Pope himself has pronounced it a genuine miracle.
21:31And his holiness is infallible.
21:36Where were you at the time of the murder?
21:38If you don't mind me asking, Father.
21:40This Robin is sacristy.
21:41I have an imminent meeting at the ayuntamiento in view of recent unfortunate events.
21:52I'm sure you can find your own way out.
21:54Tomasina is a miracle.
22:07Her accounts of the visions were questioned by people in the village.
22:12They claimed she was subject to religious delusions.
22:17She spent some time in a clinic for bipolar disorder.
22:21Does it make her a killer?
22:23No, I know that.
22:27Rodriguez is all set to become a monsignor for services to the church.
22:32These visions were exposed as a scam.
22:34He'd have an awful lot to lose.
22:37Yeah.
22:38Still doesn't explain why Bernie was murdered, though.
22:42Maybe she stumbled across something that he was desperate to hide.
22:50Jamil!
22:51So?
22:53How's it going with Kate?
22:54Yeah, she's here with me now on speakerphone.
22:59Hi.
23:00Yes.
23:02So, I have spoken to the lads.
23:06And I thought you both might want to update on Jason Agil.
23:10The passenger that had an argument with Bernie.
23:13Oh.
23:13Yes.
23:14Well, he's very much married, but estranged from his wife.
23:18He's behind with his maintenance payments.
23:20His window cleaning business went bust during COVID.
23:23And he is up to his eyeballs in debt.
23:26Okay, well, thank you very much for the update.
23:29And we'll check in with you later.
23:30Yes.
23:31Okay.
23:33Bye, guys.
23:34Bye.
23:38How much money has Donna's charity raised?
23:41The Giving for Wishes page?
23:42Yes.
23:43Way over a hundred grand in donations.
23:46Maybe Jason was after more than a Christmas fling.
23:49Well, there's only one way to find out.
23:54Oh, no.
23:55I am not stepping foot on that ship.
23:57Jack, you never even said goodbye.
23:59Marlo didn't even give me a choice.
24:00And if you seriously think, you'd ever let me back on board.
24:04Not in a million years.
24:06With all due respect, Captain, if Jack can help us solve this,
24:09it would literally only mean a few hours on board.
24:12It was crime solving that got him thrown off the ship in the first place.
24:15We should leave this to the Spanish police.
24:17I knew this was a bad idea.
24:20Look, Donna Branning has half a million followers on social media.
24:24When they find out that her best friend was murdered...
24:26On a crowdfunded Christmas cruise.
24:29I think the head office would want this resolving as soon as possible.
24:33And how will they feel about allowing a disgraced entertainer back on board?
24:37Thank you, Mr. DeVrace.
24:38I am aware of the ramifications.
24:40Look, Jack was dismissed as a member of the crew.
24:43There's nothing to stop him embarking as a passenger.
24:45Look, as soon as the ship sails, I'm gone.
24:53We sail at eight o'clock sharp.
24:56Which only leaves you five hours to find Bernie Campbell's killer.
25:02The captain's asked me to look into Bernie's murder.
25:05Jack used to be a police officer.
25:07Well, I'm not sure there's anything else I can tell you.
25:10How long have you known Jason Agnew?
25:14Couple of weeks.
25:16We met at the start of the cruise.
25:18Oh, well, he's a fast mover then.
25:21Well, he was already following me on social media.
25:24I feel like I've known him forever.
25:25I got the feeling that you and Jason were at odds yesterday.
25:30Bernie had warned him off.
25:32She could get a bit jealous sometimes.
25:36Did he ever ask you about the crowdfunding money?
25:40Well, he was worried that Bernie might try and take advantage, but I told him she'd never do that.
25:45Jason wasn't with you when we found you outside the church yesterday.
25:49Do you have any idea where he went?
25:51Well, he was angry at Bernie.
25:53Said she'd humiliated him.
25:56I tried to calm him down, but he wouldn't listen.
26:00Stormed off into the village.
26:01Bit of me time away from the kids.
26:14These Christmas cruises can take it out of you.
26:16Sorry, don't I know you?
26:17Yep, sorry.
26:18I'm Jack Grayling.
26:20I just came aboard.
26:21Kids are at home with their mum for Christmas.
26:23Oh.
26:24When were you planning on telling Donna?
26:26Just because I haven't told Donna about my ex-missus.
26:28I mean, my marriage has been done for months.
26:30And you needed to keep the maintenance payments up.
26:32The money that Donna raised for her treatment, that must have been quite an attractive proposition.
26:38What are you trying to say? That I'm using Donna as some sort of meal ticket?
26:41Well, Bernie had you down as a bit of a chancer.
26:44Maybe she had every right to be concerned.
26:46And what's that supposed to mean?
26:48You weren't with Donna yesterday when we found her.
26:52You want to tell us where you were?
26:54What, I went for a walk to clear my head?
26:56Did you walk anywhere near the Ignatius Chapel?
26:59No.
27:00Look, I've made some really big mistakes in my life, all right?
27:06I lost my business, my wife, my kids.
27:10If I were telling you anyway, you won't understand.
27:13You'd be surprised.
27:15Look, I like Donna, okay?
27:18I want to do right by her.
27:20But with Bernie out of the picture.
27:22Bernie warned me off.
27:24I walked away.
27:25That's the last time I saw her, all right?
27:26Well, no, stop!
27:32Stop!
27:34Dance yourself dizzy has always been my encore.
27:36Well, it's a Christmas Eve concert, which is why Frosty the Snowman will be sending them home.
27:41I know my audience, Colin.
27:43Yes, and it's my job to keep them happy.
27:45With that tired old shtick, you call a warmer pack.
27:47Do me a favour.
27:48Just because you got your claws into Marlowe.
27:51The captain recognises Taleb when he sees it.
27:57He's the only one who doesn't think you passed it.
27:59You do know I was offered the Blackpool grant.
28:01Oh, come off it, Eve.
28:02It was this or it was Panto in Huddersfield.
28:05The wicked queen.
28:05Well, it takes one to know one, Colin.
28:08So why don't you shtick to your Christmas karaoke?
28:11Leave the real entertainment to the pros.
28:14Pros?
28:15You're a washed-up two-bit cabaret act.
28:19When you're ready to apologise, I shall be in my dressing room.
28:30Come in.
28:31How's my favourite cruise ship doctor?
28:35Jack!
28:39Jamil told me you're back.
28:41A little query we need help with.
28:44What can you tell us about chlorpromazine?
28:47Uh, it's prescribed as an antipsychotic tip.
28:51Works by suppressing the dopamine levels.
28:54You said thomasina had been treated for a bipolar disorder.
28:57Yeah.
28:58I'm not sure where all of this is going, Jack.
29:01Well, she told us that she couldn't remember anything.
29:03Well, clearly she was lying.
29:05Memory wipeout.
29:06A common symptom of a psychotic episode.
29:10We need to get back to the village.
29:25I thought you might like some herbal tea.
29:28Good for calming the constitution.
29:31Why does everyone on this ship seem to hate me, Jamil?
29:38No, I'm sure that's not true.
29:42You know what they say about cruise ships.
29:46You're either on your way up or you're on your way down.
29:50Two hours of show tunes in high heels and spandex.
29:55Performing to a crowd wearing leisure wear.
29:57I watched you out from the back of the theatre.
30:04Then you must know my voice is shot.
30:07The doctor found some nodules.
30:10He's recommended surgery.
30:13I've been trying to hide it for weeks now.
30:15I'm so sorry to hear that.
30:17I'm planning on jumping ship.
30:21Did you tell Colin about this?
30:22He's been out to undermine me since I started this gig.
30:26No, I'm sure if you talk to him, you both can call a truce.
30:29It's a bit late for that, love.
30:36Show's over.
30:36You never told us that Tomasina was sectioned as a child.
30:43It was none of your concern.
30:45The miracle she witnessed.
30:48An episode brought on by her schizophrenia.
30:50The secret the church has tried to cover up.
30:53And if it ever came to light that you were parted to a hoax.
30:57A schizofrenia is a terrible affliction.
31:02A troubled soul possessed by demons.
31:04I was telling you the truth when I told you
31:08that I was trying to protect her.
31:12Then tell us what really happened.
31:18I found her in the chapel.
31:24Her eyes were focused on a vision.
31:28One that she alone would see.
31:31Tomasina!
31:32I should never have reached out to her.
31:37Tomasina, where are you?
31:40I followed her outside.
31:44I saw her running away towards the convent.
31:47Tomasina!
31:48So, in her confused mental state,
31:52Tomasina attacked Bernie?
31:54Tomasina had never been violent.
31:57Even when she's lost to us.
31:58So, why have you been lying to us?
31:59She came to me that evening, to offer up a confession.
32:13I swear before Christ, she was already dead when I found her.
32:17She was lying in the cloister, bleeding from a wound to her head, crucifix on the ground beside her.
32:28It was then I saw the necklace.
32:31I picked it up, I don't know why, I knelt down beside her, there was blood everywhere.
32:40I'm not sure how I got back to my room, but when I came to, I was sitting on the bed, and this was in my pocket.
32:50I found it lying on the ground beside the body.
33:03So, either the necklace was Bernie's, someone ripped it off in a struggle.
33:06Or the killer was a woman.
33:07Which reels out Jason Agnew.
33:09Jack!
33:10Jack, just give us a minute of this man.
33:13There's something you need to know.
33:14What is it?
33:15But did you find this?
33:17It was left behind at the murder scene.
33:20Do you know?
33:24I think I know who killed Bernie.
33:40Donna posted this video blog two months ago.
33:43Mm-hmm.
33:44Yeah.
33:45So, they've called me in for my pre-op tests.
33:48Let's hope I get through this one without any complications.
33:53Hmm.
33:54The placement of the NG nose tube is too far in.
33:58No medical professional would have inserted it that way.
34:01Hmm.
34:02When I checked Donna over yesterday, she seemed a little reluctant to have any tests.
34:08So, I did a better investigating of my own.
34:13Her blood test results came back this afternoon.
34:16The numbers made surprising reading.
34:18No indicators of any disease.
34:21I looked up her condition.
34:22Paper with BPC don't just get better.
34:25Spontaneous remission.
34:26There have been some recorded cases.
34:28But...
34:29It's unlikely.
34:34No, she was never ill at all.
34:37I still need some more tests.
34:39Just to be sure, but...
34:41We should be celebrating.
34:42It's like a Christmas miracle.
34:43Well, champagne.
34:44On the house.
34:47Look, this might not be the right timing, but, um...
34:50I just wonder when we get back if you, uh...
34:53Might want to make a go of things.
34:55I'd like that, Jason.
34:57Sure.
34:58Really, I would.
35:00Well, Bernie was right.
35:03Keep it safe.
35:04Shame she's not here to enjoy the moment.
35:09After everything she's done for you.
35:11I'm sure all your crowd funders will be keen to hear an update.
35:15After all that money you've scammed out of them.
35:18Sorry.
35:19You've...
35:20You've lost me.
35:21The evidence that ties you to Bernie's murder.
35:24We just couldn't figure out why.
35:27Then Dr. Tan filled me in on those blood test results.
35:30And things started to make more sense.
35:33I called that clinic in Arizona.
35:35They had no record of you ever being a patient there.
35:39Lola?
35:40You lied.
35:42About everything.
35:46I swear I was ill.
35:49I really thought it was something serious,
35:51and my GP referred me to a specialist.
35:54Bernie being Bernie.
35:55She said she'd come with me.
35:57Like any good friend would.
35:58They gave me the all clear and when I saw her waiting outside,
36:04I...
36:05I told her they were starting me on a course of treatments.
36:08Why did you lie, Donna?
36:11It made me feel special.
36:13Hang on a minute.
36:14You made all this up for a bit of attention.
36:16And those lies just got bigger, didn't they?
36:19Your blog, your podcast, your followers online.
36:22How could I tell them the truth?
36:24Those hospital visits must have taken some plenty.
36:27There's a meds room at work.
36:29It's easy to buy all that stuff online.
36:31And Bernie didn't suspect a thing.
36:34She wanted to believe it as much as I did.
36:37What did you say to Jason?
36:40What?
36:41He's the first guy who's showing any interest,
36:42but suddenly I'm in the way.
36:44You smother me, Bernie.
36:46Because your own life is sad and empty.
36:49I've spent the past six months looking after you.
36:52And this is the thanks I get.
36:54All those trips to the hospital.
36:56The late night phone calls.
36:57I made it all up.
37:00The diagnosis.
37:02The illness.
37:03It's all lies.
37:06This is fraud, Donna.
37:09We could both go to prison.
37:12Those people that we've lied to.
37:14Which is why we keep this between us.
37:18No one else needs to know.
37:20And you say that my life is empty.
37:24You think you can just walk away?
37:27Yeah, I do.
37:29Because we are done.
37:31This is done.
37:33You'd be nothing without me.
37:35You know that.
37:37By the time I'm finished,
37:39everyone is gonna know what you've done.
37:48I couldn't let her ruin everything.
37:50Surely you can see that.
37:51We can wait for the police in your cabin.
37:56I'm sorry.
37:59I'm so sorry.
38:06Okay, so I might have said a few things in the heat of the moment.
38:09Washed up.
38:10Two-bit cabaret act.
38:12Well, I'm sure we can get past it.
38:15Does that mean I get an apology?
38:19This ship isn't big enough for the both of us, Colin.
38:23Well, you're looking at a blatant breach of contract.
38:26Then sue me, twinkle toes.
38:27Yeah.
38:29Oh.
38:31I was hoping to catch Jack.
38:33He's gone back to his bar.
38:35Said he had a show to do.
38:37But it's not long until the ship sails.
38:39Yeah, and I still have these manifests to complete.
38:41We were supposed to be together.
38:42More than any two people I know.
38:43That's an admirable sentiment, Jamil.
38:45But Jack's...
38:47No, no.
38:48No.
38:49No.
38:50No.
38:51No.
38:52No.
38:53No.
38:54No.
38:55No.
38:57No.
38:58No.
38:59No.
39:00No.
39:02No.
39:03No.
39:05No.
39:06No.
39:07No.
39:08No.
39:09No.
39:10No.
39:11It looks quite right.
39:12The ship will survive without him.
39:14No.
39:17We are missing our headlines, arising though.
39:21Go and get him.
39:38That day, you left the ship.
39:40I could have come with you.
39:44Give up the dream of your own command.
39:46I never would have asked us to do that, Kate.
39:49You think you've got me all figured out, don't you?
39:52I know you better than anyone.
39:55Look, our headline act for tonight has gone AWOL.
39:58Colin is in the middle of a breakdown,
40:00and we don't have a singer for tonight's Christmas show.
40:04Then you thought I might fit the bill.
40:06Piers has already cleared it with Marlo.
40:07No, not that he had much of a choice.
40:11And what about you, Kate?
40:15Do you forgive me?
40:17Well, that depends.
40:20And what?
40:22It depends on if you're planning on sticking around.
40:27There's no more second chances, Jack.
40:34The ship sails in less than an hour.
40:37What makes you think I'll be on it?
40:48Because I'm not leaving without you.
40:50Oh, good evening, ladies and gentlemen.
41:01There are only four hours till Christmas.
41:03Are we all excited?
41:05Good, good.
41:06Well, listen, I hate to be the Christmas Grinch,
41:08but unfortunately, due to unforeseen circumstances,
41:11Eve Fontaine will not be performing for us tonight.
41:14I know, but fear not,
41:17because we have got a starter and replacement for you.
41:20Back where he belongs, he's the voice of this ship.
41:23Ladies and gentlemen, give it up for the one,
41:24the only, Mr. Jack Grayley!
41:27Baby, if you've got to go away,
41:45don't think I could take the pain,
41:49Won't you stay another day?
41:56Oh, don't leave me alone like this.
42:01Don't you say it's the final kiss.
42:04Won't you stay another day?
42:07Don't you say it's the final kiss.
42:12Don't you know we've come too far now
42:17Just to go and try to throw it all away
42:23Thought I heard you say you loved me
42:33And that your love was gonna be here to stay
42:39Stay now
42:43Baby if you've got to go away
42:46Don't think I could take the pain
42:50Won't you stay another day
42:55Stay now
42:58Oh don't leave me alone like this
43:02Don't you say it's the final kiss
43:06Won't you stay another day
43:11Thought I might find you here
43:18Just counting down the minutes to Christmas Day
43:21It's good to have you home
43:25It's good to be home
43:32Good times we had
43:34Return to haunt me
43:38Though it's for you
43:40All that I do seems to be wrong
43:44Stay now
43:48Baby if you've got to go away
43:51Don't think I could take the pain
43:56Won't you stay another day
44:00Stay now
44:03Oh don't leave me alone like this
44:07Don't you say it's the final kiss
44:11Won't you stay another day
44:15Stay now
44:23The games are fucked you mel
44:28The game's a foot, Jamil.
44:55We just need to narrow it down.
44:57Who had a motive?
44:58Their alibi is a sham.
45:02Fancy playing detectives?
45:03Now you're talking.
45:13I said stop!
45:15The next mistake, it could endanger the passengers.
45:23Can't you two go anywhere without someone getting murdered?
45:26If you or someone you know has been affected by any of the issues raised in this program,
45:39please go to channel5.com slash helplines for information and support.
45:44And see Jack and Kate tackle new cases in more stunning destinations in a new series of The
45:50Good Shit Murder starting Tuesday 6th January.
45:53Next to night, there's something about Mary.
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