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Short filmTranscript
00:00The MLB, they got to see this glorious face.
00:03My jawline got to be perfect, you know?
00:10I really want to get in shape before the wedding.
00:13I've gained 18 pounds that I cannot lose.
00:17Find a class that you want to do.
00:19I'll do it with you.
00:22What the...
00:24We're riding horse heads on a stick.
00:30Try to look up, right?
00:31Don't look at the horse.
00:32Ride the horse.
00:33Yeehaw.
00:37So what's the latest with couples counseling?
00:40We're in therapy right now discussing dad.
00:43Why are you discussing dad?
00:44Colin really wants a relationship with dad, and he's scared.
00:49It has been a little bit surprising to find out that they have been talking about Colin and Alan's relationship.
00:55Like, a medical plan is the number one thing when it comes to jobs.
01:01It's not like, what do I want to do, because I think it's fun and cool.
01:05We still need to have that conversation with your father.
01:09I think it's really important for there to be boundaries.
01:13You just don't want to hear, you should do this job.
01:16I'm going to make whatever decision I'm going to make, and I don't care what anybody else has to say.
01:20I told your dad a little bit of what you said to me and, uh...
01:25Yeah, where am I at in therapy?
01:28Uh, so...
01:29Speaking of therapy...
01:47Where are we at? What do I got to do?
01:51As we talked about in therapy, me and Colin need to set these boundaries for us.
01:56But I'm terrified that my parents will take it as a...
01:59Rejection.
02:00This is why I hate confrontation, because it feels like there's so much...
02:04To lose.
02:07But seriously, what's the deal?
02:09Like, where am I at?
02:09There's no deal.
02:10I'm here to discuss setting some boundaries, especially around my career after the military.
02:23I do understand the reasoning on why they keep pushing for a staple job with good health care.
02:29Nah.
02:30But with that said, I also want to be able to choose a career that ultimately makes me happy, and also still be able to provide for me and my family.
02:40So, in therapy, we were talking about stressors and things like that in life.
02:53And for the past, like, four months, I've been, like, really stressed about what am I going to do if I get out of the military, knowing that, like, whatever decision that I make is not only affecting me, but her and potentially our future family.
03:11So, it's just, like, so it's just, like, a lot of weight on my shoulders, and I know that you feel very, like, strongly about, like, health care, and, like, making sure that I have a really good health care program with whatever job that I choose.
03:25And that made it super difficult to, like, try and come to a decision on what I wanted to do, because I really have decided to go in the direction of real estate.
03:47And they don't really offer health care benefits.
03:55When I hear that Colin wants to go into real estate, my first impression is, has he ever sold anything?
04:08Are you a salesman?
04:10I don't think it's the most stable in terms of income and steady income and things like that.
04:16For Balin and Colin, my biggest concern is medical insurance.
04:20She's on our plan for a time being, and that doesn't last very long.
04:29Balin has a lot of medical needs, and we don't know if those will dissipate anytime soon.
04:35There are ways that we can still have health care and good health care benefits,
04:39but it's just really where I see myself being the happiest and something that I can be really successful in.
04:46And I'm just hoping you guys can still respect that decision.
04:52So, that's really it.
04:58All right.
04:59Well, I'll give you my spiel.
05:02My best answer is, like, have a plan.
05:05Say to yourself, I'm going to work on this for this long,
05:08and if I don't make what I want, I don't know how much longer I'm going to work towards it.
05:13Right?
05:13My opinion would be, have a set amount that you need to make in a year.
05:19Like, this is the minimum I am willing to make
05:22so that it doesn't put too much stress on Balin and what she has to do and for her health.
05:28Like, either I can feed the kids or I can't.
05:32It's one or the other.
05:33Julie and I get it.
05:38Like, we want you to be happy, but things change in relationships.
05:43Things change in your life.
05:45And we want you to be kind of prepared, have a plan, understand what the future can bring you.
05:52And in case real estate doesn't take off in a few months or whatever their time frame is,
05:57we would feel a lot more comfortable if they had a solid backup plan.
06:01Real estate might be a struggle.
06:05Getting calls and getting up and showing people houses and learning about when's the last time the roof was done
06:11and answering hundreds of questions about structures and homes and HOA fees and all.
06:16You might be like, oh, I didn't know it was going to be like this.
06:22It's a long road to that dead end.
06:24And by the time people realize that it's a dead end, they've wasted half their life and they're trying to go back and they need to run out of time.
06:31So all the great, wonderful, happiness, dreams of whatever, they're in the cemetery.
06:36Their names are written on tombstones.
06:38So if this doesn't work out, what are you going to do?
06:46Come up with something that you have as a backup plan as well.
06:49We came here to be able to set boundaries and here we are where I'm being told that I need to have a backup plan for a real estate.
07:02And trust me, I get it.
07:04They just want to make sure that she's taken care of.
07:08Take it back.
07:08But nothing's ever really going to change if they just can't trust us to be able to make our own decisions.
07:15Moving forward, like, please, like, if there's something we can do, Julia, to help you, tell us.
07:22But when you guys go to your therapy sessions, focus on yourselves.
07:27Forget about me.
07:30All right.
07:31I think it's time to head on back.
07:33Yeah, we have to go get the doggies and check on the babies.
07:37All right.
07:38Thanks for having us.
07:39I know, but then I feel bad bringing them back.
07:41Thanks, honey.
07:42Whatever you need, all right?
07:43Yeah, you did.
07:44No worries, all right?
07:45Yeah.
07:47It appeared to me by the end of the night that they were both pretty receptive to our thoughts on his career change.
07:56But that could be different when they get in the car and they start bouncing ideas.
08:01You know, everyone's lens is different, so maybe they just did a good job holding it together.
08:06I don't know.
08:07After that conversation and everything, like, how are you feeling?
08:17Regarding, like, my dad, it doesn't surprise me that he said a plan.
08:23It's very valid.
08:23Like, I can't be making $30,000 and be expecting us to live off that.
08:32We have three dogs.
08:33If we ever want to start a family, we would be paying for health care out of pocket.
08:37It would just be really hard.
08:38It would be very, very difficult.
08:42Your dad, do I think that I'm going to still feel pressures from him?
08:46100%.
08:47I know that they probably don't agree with my real estate decision.
08:54I understand where Julie and Alan are coming from.
08:57I know it's not going to be easy, but it's something that I want to do.
09:03I truly believe that this is what is best for me and for us.
09:06And I don't quite understand why I need a backup plan when I don't plan on failing.
09:13For me, I could not go to bed at night knowing that I didn't provide the best plan forward.
09:21Well, they have to find a balance with chasing this so-called happiness that he says, which I completely understand.
09:31Happiness is looking in the mirror and saying to yourself, I was able to have a paycheck and work some overtime.
09:38Or I got a medical plan.
09:39Or I have a life insurance policy.
09:42So if something happens to me, my significant other isn't going to struggle with my children in the future.
09:47That's why I tried to explain it in a way where he could understand.
09:51Because at first, I thought to myself, this probably ain't the best decision I haven't heard in the last five years.
09:59I know for my four boys, that would be a hard no.
10:04This career change is a little bit of a gamble.
10:07But Alan supports it.
10:09She supports him.
10:11So we support him.
10:12We really are always towing the line between being, like, supportive and firm, but not overstepping.
10:22But for lack of better words, it would probably be irresponsible for him to not have a backup plan.
10:29Because things are always going to come at you that you can't plan for.
10:33So if you have some idea of where you're going to go next, at least, you know, it's something to work with instead of nothing.
10:42My neurologist gave me a referral to start exposure response prevention therapy.
10:51Would you want to work on your fear of horses?
10:56What is kind of like the goal?
10:59Dick.
10:59We're going to get to a place where you can ride the horse.
11:02I do not think that I'm going to get on a horse today because I'm petrified of horses.
11:07More deep breaths.
11:10Bitch.
11:12You like the pink dog carrier?
11:27No.
11:27Oh, why?
11:29Because none of our dogs want to stay in here.
11:31Fluffy does.
11:32Fluffle Puffle likes it.
11:33But you said, why are we carrying Fluff?
11:35I like it.
11:36You look good in pink.
11:37Yeah.
11:38Thanks for taking me out to dinner for my birthday last night.
11:41With all the expenses from the wedding coming up and us trying to save money, me and Colin decided that I would have my birthday just between both of us with a cute little dinner.
11:54And a cute family walk with the dogs this morning with the Fluffle.
11:56Hi, Ken.
11:58Hi, little man.
12:01I'm not taking much today because the walk is so peaceful and calming that it just has been helping with my tics.
12:09Do you really think that our dogs are going to be able to walk up the aisle at our wedding?
12:14No, they'll need training.
12:16That's something that we're going to have to talk to our wedding planner about.
12:20All right, serious question.
12:23Who's going to be the best flower girl out of the two of you?
12:25I'm excited to work with the wedding planner.
12:37We need a lot of help.
12:39We need a lot of direction is what we need.
12:42My parents recommended that we get a wedding planner.
12:45We've been doing a lot of research and we really liked this person named Shannon.
12:50We're really hoping that the wedding planner can help us with, one, everything.
12:54The only thing we've gotten done is the venue.
12:57There's food, there's alcohol, there's flowers, there's hair and makeup, there's transportation for our guests.
13:04There's a lot, everybody.
13:06There's a lot of things we need to do.
13:07We don't need to list them all.
13:08We have a lot.
13:09Get a horse.
13:11Oh, my God.
13:11Save a horse, ride a cowboy, mother****.
13:13Ride the horse.
13:17It's so pretty.
13:19Really pretty.
13:20This walk was a perfect way to work out.
13:22Don't have to touch anything.
13:23Don't have to worry about anybody's germs.
13:26I do feel like working through my fear of germs is the only way to get through everything, though,
13:32because I don't want to be like this forever.
13:34Like, I do want to be able to go to a gym.
13:36And the only way to go to a gym is to put myself into a gym.
13:41I've always had OCD, but recently my OCD has manifested itself into having a problem with germs.
13:49And touching gym equipment that's shared with other people is just too much for me right now.
13:55I feel like I'm at my peak.
13:57I'm at as much as I can take.
13:58I kind of just think that I'm going to get all the germs and get sick and end up in the hospital or get sick and even die.
14:10Dr. Flaherty, my neurologist, gave me a referral to start seeing Dr. Russell, an ERP therapist.
14:17It's exposure response prevention therapy for my obsessive compulsive dick for my OCD.
14:25Exposure therapy.
14:26Yes.
14:26I really want to resolve my fear of germs.
14:30Mm-hmm.
14:31Is there anything you can think of?
14:33Well, I mean, if I'm going to want a horse in our wedding, would you want to work on your fear of horses?
14:45Would you at least ask if it's something that you could work on?
14:49I mean, yeah.
14:59Yeah, I can ask her.
15:01It's something that needs to be worked on.
15:04Okay.
15:05Yippee-ki-yay, mother...
15:07I really appreciate Vaylin being willing to confront her fear of horses, just for me.
15:16I mean, that...
15:17I'm doing it for me, too.
15:18I'm doing it for me, too.
15:19I mean, I'm just saying, that's a tough thing to do.
15:22Like, I wouldn't be able to work through one of my fears.
15:24I don't want to be near the things that I'm afraid of.
15:27Yeah, I know.
15:28Me either.
15:29Me either.
15:29Me either.
15:30Yep.
15:31Pumpkin wants to go in this water so badly.
15:34What if we just, like, give him a little dip right now?
15:36Come on!
15:41Oh, yeah, he don't like it.
15:42He knows how to swim, though.
15:44You're a good man.
15:46I know you know how to swim.
15:49Oh!
16:02Penny!
16:06You're going to sit in bed with me and do something.
16:09What?
16:10What are you doing?
16:11Hmm.
16:11Come on.
16:12I just want to go over a few things.
16:14The venue stuff.
16:15So I want to just be able to start writing some things down, things that are helpful for
16:21them, because I think that they're clueless.
16:23I'm kind of clueless, too.
16:24But I know that they need to get the show on the road.
16:27And I'll make sure that the wedding coordinator knows what she's doing.
16:31We can't be sure that Malin and Colin listened to everything, advice-wise, that we give them.
16:36But they did pick out a wedding planner.
16:38Thankful for that.
16:40Definitely thankful for that.
16:42Right now, I'm really just making a list of things that I think are important for them
16:46to go over with her.
16:48Things that maybe they just wouldn't think of.
16:50So hopefully that they will be able to use this as a reference when they speak with her.
16:55Just listen.
16:56Okay.
16:56Write food.
16:57Okay, food.
16:57Next to food.
16:58Okay.
16:59Just write desserts.
17:01Okay.
17:02Underneath that, put transportation.
17:04How many people are staying local or are traveling?
17:07How are people getting to your hotel?
17:09Are we ride sharing?
17:10Who's doing the photos?
17:14Is this going to be random done by iPhone?
17:16Oh, doggies.
17:17Yes, that's a big one.
17:18And how, like, who's watching them that night when...
17:21That's what I mean.
17:21Where are they going?
17:22When they're trying to Christian the marriage.
17:30Hilarious.
17:31Okay.
17:31F***ing hilarious.
17:33I mixed up the word a little bit and made it sound a little bit more Christ-like.
17:38It's not very Christ-like to do stuff before marriage.
17:43Everyone's doing stuff, I guess.
17:44I don't know.
17:45I can't.
17:46I think...
17:48I'm...
17:48Next...
17:49Moving on, next question.
17:52I'm thinking, like, responsibilities of the bridesmaid and groomsmen.
17:57Like, there's a lot that Sammy, I think, has to do.
18:00As the maid of honor.
18:01She does all the dress stuff.
18:02And that's kind of a big deal.
18:05I just know it's going to be a lot for her.
18:07So, we definitely have to incorporate Sammy.
18:13But, I don't know.
18:17It's getting harder for her to come here.
18:19And I think I used to look at it that it was, like, the flying.
18:24The flying is a small piece of the puzzle.
18:26She has, honestly, crippling anxiety.
18:30In an ideal world, Sammy would have a whole ton to do with the wedding planning, because
18:37that's what the maid of honor does.
18:39I know Sammy would love to be super involved, and she is so detail-oriented.
18:43But it's really just not realistic.
18:46I can't just drive down the road and see you, you know?
18:49So, it's kind of like I feel bad that I can't be here sometimes.
18:52With my anxiety and OCD and traveling, I feel terrible.
18:57Like, I just can't shut my mind off.
18:58Like, I know she needs us, right?
19:07All right.
19:11Her brain, I think, is exhausted at the end of each day.
19:15So, this just adds to it.
19:18But I know that she wants to help Valen.
19:21I mean, I don't like being far from Sammy.
19:23I would just like to be able to hug her and help her.
19:32Anxiety and OCD seems to be, like, a common thread.
19:52I see it in Valen and Sammy, and we're obviously keeping a close eye on Beckner.
20:00Okay.
20:03Yeah, good.
20:05Mm-hmm.
20:05Unfortunately, right now, it seems like we need to put a little bit more attention into Sammy
20:13because her condition seems almost a little bit stronger.
20:19That's our job as parents, to keep a watchful eye on all of our kids.
20:24She's always been the strong one, so she just doesn't like to be vulnerable.
20:28Like, let us do something to help you.
20:31We've got to make sure everything's perfect for you, too.
20:42Babe.
20:47All right.
20:48I'm fine.
20:49I don't know.
20:50I don't like horses.
20:59They can throw you off.
21:01They can kick you.
21:03Bite you.
21:04Everything about them is scary to me.
21:07I want to back up.
21:09I don't know if I can do this.
21:17Okay.
21:20I know one thing and one thing only.
21:25I've done all my homework for this.
21:27What was the homework that Dr. Russell gave you?
21:30I'm supposed to look at horses, watch horses.
21:33So all I've been doing is looking at videos because we don't really live close to horses.
21:38The first session with Dr. Russell went really, really well.
21:41We kind of went off of my OCD and built a hierarchy for the things I want to work towards.
21:47So starting with horse therapy, we can build off of go do other things like germ therapy
21:52that are more complex than horseback riding.
21:56Tell me a little bit about how OCD is controlling your life.
22:00What do you feel like are the most distressing parts about OCD for you?
22:03Like, I know germs because everything has to be wiped down.
22:06The dishes have to be done.
22:07I will clean the whole house before I even drink water in the morning.
22:11What ERP is going to really ask you to do is to really confront your fears.
22:17My other half is obsessed with horses, and I'm deathly afraid of horses.
22:22But I'm like, it's one of the fears that can be changed.
22:26Yeah, absolutely.
22:27A big part of exposure therapy is actually getting out and doing this in public.
22:31I think this is the right next step.
22:32So today we are meeting up with Dr. Russell for my first ERP session with horses at a horse ranch outside of D.C.
22:42My therapist says you have to walk before you can run.
22:45Me facing my fear of horses and exposure is me walking.
22:50It's all practice for when I have to tackle my bigger fears and run with germs.
22:55This is how I build up my tolerance step by step.
22:57I don't want to say I'm not going to enjoy today, but not thrilled.
23:03Not thrilled.
23:06I know you are.
23:08These horses are going to be real nice.
23:11Mm-hmm.
23:11They'll want to just lick you.
23:13I don't want to be licked, so.
23:17Their tongue is massive, okay?
23:19Yeah.
23:19If their body's massive, their tongue is massive, and I don't need that licked on me.
23:23Well, that's just a massive amount of love that they want to give you.
23:26Nope.
23:27The worst case scenario for how this horse exposure therapy could go is that I don't follow through.
23:36Do you think that's the worst?
23:38What did you think the worst case scenario is?
23:42Something traumatizes you forever.
23:46Okay, we don't need to.
23:47Okay.
23:48Okay.
23:49Okay.
23:50Okay.
23:51Oh, my God.
23:53I have a pit in my stomach.
23:54I really do.
23:56Uh-oh.
24:10We're here.
24:12I'm very anxious as we're pulling in, and I'm seeing horses.
24:16We're seeing people on horses.
24:17My heart rate is at at least 250, because I don't like horses, and we're pulling up literally two seahorses.
24:23So, let's go, let's go.
24:28Hey.
24:29Hey.
24:38Hey.
24:41You want a hug?
24:42Yes.
24:42Okay.
24:43Hi.
24:44Nice to see you.
24:44Hi.
24:45Nice to meet you.
24:47So how was the drive-in?
24:48Anxiety-driven, but we're here.
24:52I told Colin I said the only reason I'm here is because you're here.
24:54So we're here.
24:56Well, I'm here with you.
24:57We're here.
24:57We're going to get this.
24:59As Valen rolls up today, I'm already noticing she's feeling pretty anxious.
25:03I can tell she's already anticipating some of the exposures we're about to do today.
25:07In my clinical opinion, I think Valen's OCD is pretty severe.
25:10However, she seems incredibly motivated to work on it.
25:14She's being really brave.
25:16We're going to do the exposure therapy today with the horses, but we're going to do one
25:20step at a time.
25:22It's going to be challenging.
25:23Okay.
25:24So we're going to start with, we're just going to kind of introduce you to the horses.
25:28I know that you're even just kind of being around them scary for you.
25:32So we're just going to kind of look at them from a distance and then kind of gradually
25:35get more comfortable being closer to them.
25:38And I'm going to be checking in with you with your SUDs.
25:41Do you remember the one through ten SUDs?
25:43Mm-hmm.
25:44SUDs are subjective units of distress scale, and it's on a scale of one to ten.
25:50One being really no distress at all, very calm, relaxed.
25:54Ten feeling very distressed, almost out of control.
25:57Once you kind of, the SUDs level comes down, I can tell they're a little high right now.
26:02Mm-hmm.
26:02Then we're going to take the next step and the next step and the next step.
26:06So what is kind of like the goal?
26:09Where could she like end up at by the end of today?
26:11Deck.
26:12We're going to get to a place where you can ride the horse.
26:15That's the goal.
26:16Today?
26:16Hopefully.
26:17I do not think that I'm going to get on a horse today because I'm petrified of horses.
26:23They are extremely muscular.
26:25They can throw you off.
26:27They can kick you.
26:28They can bite you.
26:31Just everything about them is scary to me.
26:36So exposure one underway.
26:39Yes.
26:40Look at them.
26:41Yeah, just look at them.
26:45That one's talkative.
26:47Kind of like any animal noise that I can mock sets my tics off because it's just a trigger
26:51that I can't remove.
26:53How are you feeling?
26:54Getting closer?
26:55Hi.
26:55I want to back up.
26:57Okay.
26:57Okay.
26:58I think we'll stay here for now.
27:02This is like a good distance for you?
27:03Yeah.
27:04Okay.
27:04What level are you feeling?
27:05I want to cry.
27:06Okay.
27:06It's okay.
27:07How about we take a couple steps back?
27:08Okay.
27:09Okay.
27:10It's okay.
27:14I'm so overwhelmed.
27:16This is moving way too fast.
27:19This is all we're doing right now.
27:21Just this exposure.
27:22Okay?
27:24I don't know if I can do this.
27:27Deep breaths.
27:27Okay?
27:29More deep breaths.
27:30What level are you feeling?
27:48I want to cry.
27:49It's okay.
27:50How about we take a couple steps back?
27:51Okay.
27:52Okay.
27:53It's okay.
27:53As Baelin sees the horses for the first time, I can see that she's feeling a lot more distressed
28:00and I can tell that it's a little too overwhelming for her.
28:03So we have her back up to a spot where she can engage with the exposure more.
28:07Okay.
28:08What's your suds right now?
28:09What number?
28:10Six.
28:10Six?
28:11Mm-hmm.
28:11I'm like, I'm fine to look at them, but not fine to get near them.
28:15It's okay.
28:16This is where we're at right now.
28:19I knew she was afraid of horses, but I didn't realize that this is the extent of how much she
28:27is afraid.
28:28This might be goodbye to a horse at the wedding.
28:30Which one do you like the best?
28:36I'm guessing the smaller one?
28:37Yeah, the one with the Mohawk.
28:38The Mohawk.
28:40Sparky.
28:40And this is Coco.
28:42Sparky and Coco.
28:43Aren't those cute names?
28:44Yeah, those are cute names.
28:45That makes it better.
28:46Mm-hmm.
28:47That makes it better.
28:48The names of the horses seem to kind of soothe her a bit.
28:51I can tell that she's feeling a little bit more relaxed.
28:53I think it's always surprising, the things that seem to calm people in exposures, but this
28:57one makes sense.
28:58You know, she's such an animal lover, so do you want to take another step?
29:01Yeah.
29:02Okay.
29:06No, we're getting pretty close.
29:08They're taking steps, too.
29:10Hi.
29:11Okay, I think the next step would be to hold your hand out.
29:15Okay?
29:16Mm-hmm.
29:19Scary.
29:20But we're close enough that, you know, they can start petting them.
29:23Despite my fear, I'm so determined and motivated to get through this.
29:28And to conquer my fear of horses.
29:31Where does this one like to be pet?
29:33On his neck or on his face right here.
29:34Right there?
29:35Yeah.
29:36Okay, so I think that's this.
29:37Oh, he thinks you have a tree because we're sticking your hand out.
29:40Oh.
29:41Oh, my goodness.
29:42Hey, that's okay.
29:43You can pet his face right here.
29:44You can pet him right here.
29:45Wow.
29:49Okay.
29:49You got it.
29:51You're doing a good job, Balin.
29:54Or you can pet his neck.
29:55Yeah, like right here.
29:55You want to pet right here?
29:57Wow.
29:58Look at you go.
29:59Oh, it sheds.
30:00Oh, yeah.
30:01He does.
30:01Oh, yeah.
30:03Yeah.
30:03I like your little mohawk.
30:08I'm very nervous.
30:09However, I'm very proud of myself that I'm able to touch the horse when seconds ago I wasn't able to.
30:15And I'm just making sure that I'm not getting bit.
30:18Are you ready for the next step?
30:24What is it?
30:25Can she lead the horse?
30:26Yeah.
30:27How do I do that?
30:28So you stand on the left side, and you have your hand, one hand right here, and then one hand folding the other side of the lead rope so it doesn't drag.
30:34Come on, Sparky.
30:35Come on, Sparky.
30:36Look at you go.
30:38Come on.
30:39Come on.
30:40If you want to turn him this way, you can just walk your body this way.
30:43Come on, Sparky.
30:45Oh, we're going in the grass.
30:46Yes.
30:48I am really surprised that I'm able to lead the horse when, short minutes ago, I was not even able to step forward to touch the horse.
30:56It gives me comfort to picture Sparky as my dog Fluff.
31:01A real big Fluff.
31:04Meaty Fluff.
31:06A really, really muscular Fluffle.
31:10So, cleaning the hoods, wherever you want to start.
31:14Dr. Russell's definitely a taskmaster with these exposures.
31:17And now I'm cleaning hooves.
31:20Hooves.
31:21Hooves.
31:21Hooves.
31:22Hooves.
31:23Hoo-hooves.
31:24Hoo-hooves.
31:25Woo-hoo.
31:26Woo-hoo-hoo.
31:28Eat a bag of dicks.
31:31Woo-hoo.
31:32Woo-hoo.
31:33She's got me brushing the horse.
31:35And I'm also brushing myself because it's setting off my tics.
31:38Look at your bum.
31:41It feels really nice to not have something hold me back and to just leap over that wall of fear.
31:48Son of a...
31:48You're looking pretty comfortable.
31:50I think you're ready.
31:53Next up.
31:54Saddle up.
31:54Saddle up.
31:55I did not think I was going to make it this far today.
32:00I am petrified to saddle up on this horse and gallop right now.
32:06No one said you're galloping.
32:08You just got to get on it.
32:09Yeah.
32:11That's even scarier.
32:20I'm a little bit scared because I'm petrified of heights and being on top of a horse just
32:24makes me go right to think I'm going to fall off the horse and I'm going to get hurt.
32:30You got it.
32:31Oh, my God.
32:33Here's the reins if you want to grab them.
32:35And you can hold on to the front of the saddle if you want to.
32:37Oh.
32:40Okay.
32:41How are you feeling?
32:42What's your number?
32:43Um, like a 10.
32:45Okay.
32:45Okay.
32:46We're just going to stay here for a minute.
32:47Okay?
32:47Okay.
32:49And you can relax.
33:00Remember, Balin, a lot of anxiety is anticipatory.
33:03It gets better once you do it.
33:04Okay?
33:08Ready?
33:09Yeah.
33:10Hey, Sparky.
33:19Seeing Balin get on the horse right now, it just makes me so happy because I was going
33:24into the day thinking that she was not going to get on it, was not going to ride it.
33:30She was just going to maybe at most pet it.
33:33So seeing her on that horse, it really made me happy.
33:37It's a good boy, Sparky.
33:38This is definitely a lot better.
33:42Okay.
33:44You just need your last call.
33:46I feel free trying around the arena with the horse.
34:01Probably for other people, being on a horse is freeing.
34:03That's not what was freeing for me.
34:05Freeing to me was like being able to be out of my thoughts and not being controlled by them.
34:09So, what's your sides at?
34:15Honestly, low.
34:17Like a three or a four.
34:18Yeah, you got it.
34:19Now that you've got to ride on one, do you think we could ride off one into the sunset
34:25after our wedding?
34:26No.
34:28Okay.
34:29I'm definitely more comfortable around horses.
34:32That should have been your question.
34:34The vision is I would love for me and you to ride off into the sunset.
34:38Damn.
34:40Well, you could ride it with fluff toot and punk.
34:41No.
34:42Colin.
34:43No.
34:44Thank you for being brave, Balin.
34:46Thank you so much.
34:47I can do hard things.
34:49Okay, you don't need to, we don't need to do that.
34:51We don't need that.
34:53But I love you.
34:54Love you too.
34:54Food and dessert is like very big for us.
35:01Okay.
35:02Kind of like a semi-open bar.
35:04I want alpacas.
35:05Alpacas.
35:06A horse.
35:08We need to manage expectations.
35:11In thinking about your budget, I think you're not going to love what I have to tell you.
35:22Let me see this.
35:24Let me see that girl.
35:26It's a stupid show.
35:28Got you a style.
35:30Let me see that girl.
35:41I'm excited.
35:42Wedding planners do this as their full-time job.
35:46Try and figure out like what fits and what doesn't.
35:49Yeah.
35:49Today we are meeting with our wedding planner, Shannon, for the first time.
35:52We're hoping to get a better understanding of everything and how far our budget will go.
35:59I'm very thankful that my mom put together a list of important things that we need to discuss with our wedding planner.
36:05It's a long list.
36:07I woke up missing horses.
36:10Hey!
36:16Hello!
36:17Hi!
36:18Hi!
36:19How are you guys?
36:20Nice to meet you.
36:22Can I give you a hug?
36:23You sure can.
36:24Nice to meet you.
36:25Nice to meet you.
36:26My name is Shannon with Shannon Wellington Weddings and Events.
36:29This is Chris.
36:30We are a wedding and event design and planning company and we've been doing this for about 15 years now.
36:36Our goal for today is to learn all about Valen and Colin and what their priorities are for their wedding day.
36:43Tell me more about your experience with weddings.
36:46I know when we had talked briefly, Valen, you said you don't have a ton of experience at being in weddings or going to weddings.
36:55Nothing.
36:55Okay.
36:56And how about you, Valen?
36:57What's your experience?
36:57Yeah, I've been in, or I've been to a few, but nowhere close to, like, knowing how to plan for a wedding.
37:04Okay.
37:05Eat a bag of dicks.
37:07While we've never actually had a bride or groom that specifically had a condition like Drette, many of our brides and grooms have anxiety.
37:16They have their own quirks, so to say.
37:19So we have to be able to kind of roll with it.
37:22A wedding planning can be overwhelming and stressful, but it should also be really fun.
37:29So why don't you guys tell me about what venue you've chosen?
37:33Because you found one that you love.
37:36Yes.
37:37It's locked down.
37:38Yes.
37:38Perfect.
37:40We've already put a wedding deposit down on our venue.
37:43While the venue expense has eaten up a large portion of our wedding budget, we still have high expectations for the rest of the wedding, like flowers and food and my dress and colors.
37:54So much fun stuff.
37:55What drew you to this venue?
37:58The views.
37:59The views.
37:59It's 360.
38:01It's...
38:01It's on top of a mountain.
38:03Okay.
38:04It's in the middle of nowhere.
38:06Okay.
38:07Is there, like, a hotel nearby?
38:09It's about 20 minutes to a hotel.
38:12But we also need to work into the budget chartering buses.
38:15Right.
38:16Because they go up and down the mountain, and I would rather do that than have anyone else drive.
38:21I think the location of the venue that Bailon and Colin chose are definitely going to present some challenges in terms of fees.
38:27Travel fees.
38:28Exactly.
38:28Travel fees.
38:29I mean, if there's not someone extremely hyper-local to the venue, then most vendors are going to say, okay, like, we'll come, sure.
38:38But for this, you know, additional price, what are you looking forward to the most?
38:44I think flowers would be number one.
38:46Okay.
38:46Food would be number two.
38:48Okay.
38:49Food and dessert is, like, very big for us.
38:52Okay.
38:53Anything, like, fun that you've seen that you, like, definitely want?
38:57I want alpacas.
38:59Alpacas.
39:00A horse.
39:02You want to ride in on a horse?
39:04No, he...
39:04Oh, you want to ride in on a horse?
39:06As far as the alcohol goes, we're thinking kind of like a semi-open bar.
39:12Have you guys ever done a queso fountain?
39:14A queso fountain.
39:18I definitely want the dogs in the wedding.
39:20To me, that's a deal breaker.
39:21Like, they're going to be in there regardless of if they're walking or if they're being held.
39:26Our dogs are not trained at all.
39:27This is in the hard column.
39:31We need to manage expectations.
39:35So part of our job is educating them so that we can be like, okay, this is what reality is.
39:41I feel like the theme is, like, we want a lot of food, a lot of alcohol, a lot of this, a lot of that.
39:48Um, in thinking about your budget, I think that it's going to be a little challenging to get to the point where we can have everything we want.
40:00The moment of truth is finally here.
40:07What if she tells us we can't afford our dream wedding?
40:10I'm definitely worried that she's bracing us for some news we don't want to hear.
40:13I think that you're not going to love what I have to tell y'all.
40:27You got that baby fever going on.
40:29I just want kids.
40:31Yeah, now.
40:32Not now.
40:34We get adjusted to the new lifestyle.
40:36Then we can get into the lab and maybe start cooking something up.
40:40What?
40:40We're going to go wedding dress shopping this week, but Sammy won't physically be there.
40:48Because of her anxiety, Sammy could possibly not be here to enjoy that experience with Bailen and I.
40:55To me, that's the connection.
40:57It's my girls.
40:59I'm so excited, but I'm so nervous.
41:02Today, I'm pretty pumped about wedding dress shopping.
41:05Oh, wow.
41:06Oh, my God.
41:08Oh, my God.
41:10I hear the dry gang.
41:14Oh, my God.
41:16Oh, my God.
41:18Oh, my God.
41:18Oh, my God.
41:19Oh, my God.
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