Baylen Out Loud - Season 2 Episode 01- Obsessed with Everything
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00:00F*** off.
00:01My name is Balin.
00:03I'm 21 years old and I have Tourette's Syndrome.
00:06En a little baby weeny.
00:09Hey mother f***!
00:12Tourette's Syndrome causes me to have involuntary motor and vocal tics.
00:16This isn't good for you because then you're a f***!
00:19Lanania!
00:20I put both the hands on the palo bars.
00:23I describe our family as large, chaotic.
00:26I have four crazy and loud brothers.
00:30You can stop, kid, you can stop.
00:32And one younger sister, Sammy.
00:34Search what?
00:37Suck a wiener.
00:39That would not do.
00:42I have the world's best boyfriend, Colin.
00:45He's my medicine.
00:47So there's something I have to tell you guys.
00:51Me and Colin are going to move in with each other.
00:53This isn't like moving in with a girlfriend who has no issues.
00:57Ah!
00:59I need Colin to understand that this is a challenge.
01:02My foot's stuck.
01:05Nothing better happen to my kid.
01:07Nothing.
01:10I would like to have both of your blessings to have your daughter's hand in marriage.
01:13I knew what's coming.
01:14I just knew it.
01:15I don't really have an answer.
01:17As a guy, that's not what you're going into that conversation thinking that's how it's going to go.
01:23I just want to marry Balin.
01:29Balin, Alexandra, Dupree.
01:32Will you marry me?
01:35Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
01:38We're getting married.
01:40Life is just perfect.
01:41Someone asked me one time, how many times do I tick a day?
01:53Bah, bah!
01:55But anyways, ticks come and go.
01:58I don't know.
01:58Believe it or not, I have a gun.
02:01We're all going to die.
02:02Pluck it.
02:03Slap it.
02:04Wrap it.
02:05La, la, la, la, suck a wiener, bitch.
02:08Still loving the ring.
02:10We're still engaged.
02:11This is my ring.
02:14That's a big bitch.
02:15God damn.
02:16Man's did good.
02:19How many people have been asking you, do you have a date?
02:22That was the first thing that we got asked right after we got engaged.
02:25However, we haven't started a single thing.
02:27No wedding planning done.
02:29Yeah.
02:29Nothing.
02:30We're just living with the fact that we're just fiancé, you know?
02:38Living together is fun.
02:39At least in my eyes.
02:41I don't know what it's like living with me, so.
02:45Every day is a new day.
02:47You never know what you're going to hear or see.
02:52I'm going to take a grilled cheese up the ass.
02:54Sorry.
02:55I'm sorry.
02:55I love grilled cheese.
02:59It came out of left field.
03:02A lot of them come out of left field.
03:06All I do around this house is find socks.
03:10Not one.
03:11Have you ever lived with a man if the temperature isn't at 64 degrees in the house?
03:19He likes it at a ripe 65 Alaskan type of chill.
03:22We're just going to boost it.
03:24If you just keep going until you hit the 80s, that's about where I like it.
03:28Did you just start an ACL?
03:30No.
03:35So about five years ago, I was diagnosed with Tourette's syndrome, which is a neurological involuntary
03:41motor and vocal disorder.
03:44I decided to share my story with Tourette's on social media because I was done hiding from myself.
03:58So to be able to help others not feel overwhelmed, a little bit confused, a little bit hopeless is so important.
04:08Tourette's syndrome is never isolated by itself.
04:15It's often accompanied by other conditions or comorbidities like OCD, ADHD, depression, anxiety.
04:25And I have a lot of those.
04:31It's really good.
04:33That don't need no tweaking.
04:34This is really good.
04:39What?
04:41Why'd you?
04:41God damn!
04:43It's not bad.
04:44It's just...
04:45Oh, God damn.
04:47God damn!
04:50I have no idea where my kicking tick came from.
04:53The punch has been a common thing.
04:55She punches me in the balls.
04:56I was like...
04:57Sorry, I had to do that.
05:04I have the urge in my wrist to punch Colin in the ball sack.
05:11And it feels electrifying.
05:14It's like itching, burning, hurting.
05:18Wait, nay.
05:20And when I let it out, the urge goes away, actually.
05:24Are you excited that it's Easter and that we're going to an alpaca farm today?
05:28You're not as excited as me.
05:29Yeah, I will never be as excited as you about this alpaca.
05:34I'm so excited.
05:35I'm literally going to cry.
05:36I'm going to cry.
05:36And we get to walk with them.
05:38And they're going to help me.
05:39I hope you know that they're, like, more mean than horses.
05:42Not those ones at the farm.
05:44They spit on you.
05:45That's what llamas and alpacas do.
05:48I don't want that.
05:49My fondness for alpacas started when I was, like, 12 years old.
05:54This is where my OCD is a problem, because why am I obsessed with everything?
05:59They're just big, fluffy, lovable.
06:02I can't get enough.
06:06Yeah.
06:07And they eat sideways.
06:09Yeah.
06:11Sorry.
06:11I know that.
06:14I suggested an alpaca farm for an Easter gathering with my family, because, one, it's on my bucket list.
06:23And, two, it's been a really long time since we've all been together.
06:29However, there's some things I want to clear up with my dad.
06:31Now that time has passed since we've gotten engaged.
06:34And, considering that I don't really like confrontation, I'm a little nervous to approach my dad.
06:41And I just don't know how well it will go.
06:43Don't stop looking up
06:51Cause the sky's not coming down in my night
06:57See the sunburst shine
07:01So we can't stop now
07:04This is amazing!
07:07Bailen's gonna lose her mind.
07:09Look at that one.
07:10Staring right at you.
07:11Look at him staring at you.
07:12Here.
07:13She's, like, so obsessed.
07:14It's so crazy.
07:19There's so many.
07:20Oh, my God.
07:21Oh, my God, they have him in the front yard.
07:22Oh, my God!
07:23We could at least fit six of them in the apartment.
07:29Oh, my God!
07:31We haven't seen my parents a ton, because it's almost two hours difference to see them.
07:36This is what our front yard's gonna look like.
07:38Give me two years.
07:39You look so good!
07:41Happy Easter!
07:42Happy Easter!
07:43Happy Easter!
07:44Happy Easter!
07:45Happy Easter!
07:46Happy Easter!
07:47It's been a couple of months since we've all been together as one group.
07:51Super excited.
07:52I'm so excited.
07:53I'm so excited.
07:54Thank God.
07:55I'm so excited.
07:56I'm excited for you.
07:57Happy Easter!
07:58Happy Easter!
07:59It's not like Julie and Alan have softened up on me, but there is a difference.
08:03It's almost like they're more accepting in a way, but I think Julie and Alan are always gonna
08:10be hard on me because they're very protective parents.
08:14Like, that's just who they are.
08:16Hi.
08:17Hi.
08:18Hi.
08:19We haven't been ambushing Bailyn with calls and stop-in visits because it's good to give
08:23them some space and time to establish their new normal, and she can be more assertive at
08:29attaining her own independence without us.
08:33I know you're excited, aren't you?
08:35Not really, but...
08:37I think her figuring it out on her own a little more is better for her, but it's still my daughter,
08:45and in my mindset, we are still gonna be her parents forever.
08:50Where's Sammy?
08:52Where's Sammy?
08:54So everything was booked and she was ready to come here, and then stuff got out of sorts
08:58with too much anxiety, then her OCD crap was all kicking in.
09:02I was, Sammy, just do another time where you can come for a longer stretch, so then, like,
09:07the ends didn't justify the means, so...
09:10It's not just Bailyn dealing with issues.
09:13To be completely honest, three out of the six kids, maybe four out of the six, have anxiety
09:20and OCD.
09:21It's just how it's elicited differently and how they cope differently.
09:24But, to me, the mystery is that there is a way to hide your OCD.
09:30And Sammy does a really good job of hiding it.
09:33She does a really good job with keeping things private that she wants to keep private.
09:38How has the house been with all guys?
09:41Community .
09:43A lot of .
09:44A lot of cleaning.
09:45We've helped.
09:46I've helped a lot.
09:47Do you do dishes?
09:48No.
09:49Nothing's changed, Bailyn.
09:52You like my shirt.
09:53I love your shirt.
09:54I love how colorful it is.
09:55Banana will be away.
09:56When we get to, like...
09:59Where's the wedding at?
10:01Just don't tell Mom but me and Connor getting married in Alaska.
10:05What's gonna be a destination wedding?
10:07What did you guys pick out of a hat?
10:10Did you guys pick out of a hat?
10:14You suck for a living.
10:16So does Colin and Sammy.
10:17Colin sucked George Washington's .
10:19Oh, Colin.
10:21Colin's busy.
10:23Yeah.
10:24Why is everything, like, a .
10:27And poor Colin George Washington tips.
10:32He's got time on his hands.
10:34I don't know.
10:35More than time, I guess, on his hands.
10:37Colin needs a second job.
10:39Yeah.
10:41Oh, hi.
10:42Welcome to Ever After Alpaca Farm.
10:44Hi.
10:45Hi.
10:46I'm Heidi.
10:47Hi.
10:48It's nice to meet you.
10:49Are you guys ready for an alpaca adventure today?
10:50Yes.
10:51Yes.
10:52Good, good.
10:53We're gonna go in the field and hand feed the boys and interact with them.
10:57Couple of field rules.
10:58Rule number one, not gonna chase alpaca.
11:00Number two, don't stand behind them because they can kick.
11:03Ooh.
11:04Now, as adults, if they were to kick, it literally feels like you stubbed your toe.
11:09It hurts for five seconds.
11:11And most people who come here want to know, am I going to get spit on?
11:15Yes.
11:16Did you wonder that?
11:17Oh, I have seen yourselves on the way over here.
11:18Yeah.
11:19I was gonna say.
11:20Now, if you were to get spit on, it's definitely stinky, but it doesn't harm us in any way.
11:25We have wipes.
11:26We will clean you up.
11:27How are you feeling?
11:28I'm good.
11:29My tics are good.
11:30I'm just really excited.
11:31My tics get a little bit more when I'm excited.
11:34There are no worries here.
11:36My tics can be elevated from any type of emotion.
11:40And even though my tics are very active right now, I'm not distressed.
11:45It's just because of how excited I am to touch the fluffies.
11:51I love your body.
11:55Oh, my God.
11:56Oh, my God.
11:57I love you.
11:58Hi, buddy.
11:59How you doing?
12:00That thing's giant.
12:01How you doing?
12:02Hold on, bud.
12:03Here.
12:04Holy...
12:05Come here.
12:06I got the good stuff right there at the bottom.
12:08Jesus.
12:09Hey, hey, hey.
12:10The thing's stuck on there.
12:11The thing's stuck on there, buddy.
12:12There.
12:13Get out of there.
12:14Get out of there.
12:15Get out of there.
12:16They end up with a lot of farms.
12:17Oh, no!
12:18Somebody spit on me.
12:19Doctor, this guy just spit on me.
12:21Oh, hell no.
12:22No way.
12:24And that's why his lip's hanging down.
12:26Oh, ho, ho, ho, ho.
12:27There we go.
12:28Run.
12:29Run.
12:30Straight.
12:31Shake him.
12:32Look at your little trout.
12:34I got you wet.
12:35Yum, yum.
12:37You're a sweetie.
12:39You don't do kisses?
12:41Thank you.
12:42Me and Colin are planning a wedding.
12:45Do you guys let the alpacas be at weddings?
12:48We've taken a couple of alpacas to the wedding.
12:50Oh, my God.
12:51We had pictures with the bride and groom.
12:52So that's the first thing we're thinking about,
12:54is if alpacas are coming.
12:56Have you done any other venue?
12:59Because you haven't really asked me for any help, so.
13:02We honestly, there's very...
13:04You're bald.
13:05There's very minimal planning.
13:06We haven't started.
13:07Okay.
13:08But we need to start looking for venues.
13:09I thought maybe you were leaving me out.
13:10No.
13:11Good to know.
13:12Being that's our first child that's engaged to be married,
13:17I would love to be super involved.
13:21Al wants to be in the wedding.
13:23Al wants to be making the plans.
13:24I'm already in the wedding.
13:25I'm already guaranteed a dance.
13:26Al's already making videos.
13:28Al's getting baby pictures.
13:30Al's crying at night.
13:32Okay.
13:33I'm gonna...
13:34It's gonna...
13:35It's fine.
13:36It's all right.
13:37Oh, my goodness.
13:39Hey, can we talk?
13:41Huh?
13:42Can we talk?
13:43Yeah, honey.
13:44Okay.
13:45Where?
13:46Right now?
13:47Yeah.
13:48Like, over there.
13:49Just recently, Colin shared with me that when he went to go talk to my parents about getting
13:56a blessing, my dad said that he had no blessing to give.
14:00I would like to have both of your blessings to have your daughter's hand in marriage.
14:03I knew it was coming.
14:04I just knew it.
14:05I don't really have an answer other than whatever Balaam wants to do, she's got our blessing.
14:15I am just confused.
14:18I don't think I actually do have his blessing.
14:22Colin knows that I plan on talking to my dad about it.
14:27But this isn't about Colin.
14:29This is about me and my dad.
14:32Because with wedding planning and everything coming around the corner, I need clarity.
14:38Um, so with our wedding coming up, you're bald.
14:45With wedding planning and I wanted to ask you because I heard that when Colin went to suck
14:53George Washington's .
14:55When I heard that Colin went to you and mom to ask for y'all's blessing and you said that there was no blessing to give, and I just want to know what that meant.
15:12I expected Balaam to actually bring this up at some point.
15:16I mean, not today.
15:19It's important to have this conversation, but I'm nervous, yeah.
15:25When I leave the house, I have to flick the lights three times before me because if I only do it once, then something bad's going to happen on the way to the airport.
15:36Sammy's anxiety and OCD becomes disabling.
15:39She has done a very good job at hiding it.
15:43I can't really, like, enjoy anything.
15:45You're like a prisoner to your own thoughts.
15:50We have been talking about our marriage, and it started with some premarital counseling.
15:59I'm confused with why they're bringing up counseling.
16:03Colin looks pissed.
16:13I was confused with when you said that there was no blessing to give, and I just want to know what that meant.
16:26I didn't mean it to be like, oh, my God, well, I don't prove a cop.
16:30Like, I'll do whatever Balaam wants to do.
16:33That is my blessing.
16:34That is my, like, hey, if Balaam's okay, we are okay.
16:37What's really sunk in that now it's them.
16:42It's not her.
16:43It's them.
16:44Anyone who's in your life needs to protect you.
16:47I know where you were when you're manic, and from where you are right now to where you were.
16:54Great.
16:55Amazing.
16:56Amazing.
16:57When he stepped into your life, it's kind of like at a time where I think that's really helped you move forward.
17:05There's such a realism with this condition because my whole focus up until she met Colin was, how can we get Balaam better?
17:15Four to five years ago, Balaam was in the darkest place of her life.
17:18There's some things that people don't know.
17:21A lot of things.
17:22And something that I'm still grappling with.
17:25I just want to make sure that, like, suck a fat bitch.
17:31That there was no harsh feelings.
17:35Oh, my God, no.
17:37We love you guys, okay?
17:39We're just truly grateful to even, like, be on this adventure.
17:43And whatever you guys want to do in your wedding is fine by me.
17:45I'm 100%.
17:46You're talking about this adventure.
17:48Dad, without you and Mom, I wouldn't be here.
17:50So, thank you.
17:51You're the best dad ever.
17:52I love you.
17:53I love you.
17:54Thanks.
17:55I love you.
17:56I'm here to help you whenever you need, okay?
17:59I love you.
18:00I'm very, very glad that we talked because I was able to get more clarity, but also at
18:06the end of the day, like, I'm still marrying Colin.
18:08It's actually crazy that we're walking alpacas.
18:10Yeah, it's way cooler than I thought.
18:12I hope that my parents are now starting to see how amazing Colin is because he's proved over
18:18and over and over and time and time again that he's for me.
18:22What's up, Graham?
18:23What's going on, Graham?
18:24What's going on, Graham?
18:25Your hair looks so good.
18:26You look so much brighter.
18:29Candy is Mima, and she is my mom.
18:50Wow, you look a little fried today.
18:51I got all the sun today.
18:52You're so tired.
18:53Nima lives both in New York and in Florida, but she will not let life get in the way of
19:05being a part of her grandkids' lives.
19:07I'm sorry.
19:08You're so tired from going to alpaca, huh?
19:09Oh, but that's okay.
19:10I'm glad I get to see you.
19:12I'm excited to be here because I don't even remember when the last time was that I spent
19:15Easter with the family.
19:18Oh, yeah.
19:19So long.
19:20Easter.
19:21Everything that they're involved in, I want to be involved in.
19:26I love them to death.
19:28Balen has always had that special place in my heart.
19:31And I don't look at Bae as having Tourette's.
19:35I see Bae as she's got the biggest heart.
19:38Oh, Bae, it's beautiful.
19:41I think Balen and Colin make a great couple.
19:44I think the engagement was awesome.
19:46Is Colin here?
19:47Mm-mm.
19:48No Colin?
19:49He's at work.
19:50Oh, that bitch.
19:51I know.
19:54Where's Sammy?
19:55No, Sammy.
19:56She just couldn't do it.
19:58You know how it goes with her.
19:59I know.
20:00She felt bad, and I didn't want to make her feel bad.
20:02Come on, Winnie.
20:03Let's go outside.
20:04I'm going to take Winnie out.
20:06I'm going to FaceTime Sammy about the alpaca farm.
20:09Come on.
20:10He needs to go out.
20:13I miss Sammy, and I love her.
20:15And I know it's getting harder and harder for her to travel.
20:18Sammy's anxiety and OCD becomes disabling.
20:22She has done a very good job at hiding it,
20:26but it has become more difficult for her to travel
20:31because of it being at a very high peak.
20:36You're taking a .
20:37Pick up.
20:38Hi.
20:39Hi.
20:40You look sunburnt.
20:41I said .
20:42No, it was a long day.
20:43I'm not kidding you.
20:44We missed you.
20:45I know.
20:46I miss you guys, too.
20:47But I'm the only one that really has to take a flight there,
20:48so then when mom's like, oh, just get on the flight.
20:50It's fine.
20:51Like, oh, it's just a quick little flight.
20:52Like, it's not.
20:53Like, oh, it's just a quick little flight.
20:54Like, it's not.
20:55When I leave the house, I have to flick the lights three times before me
20:56because if I only do it once and something bad's going to happen on the way to the airport,
20:58I can only say certain things.
20:59I can only wear a certain pair of shoes.
21:00I can only wear a certain pair of shoes.
21:01I have to sit in row 13 or 14 right over the wing in the aisle seat every time I get on
21:07the plane and I have to, like, look at the cockpit and make sure that all of the buttons
21:10are on.
21:11When I was eight years old, I knew I had to do things a certain way, but I wasn't sure
21:15why.
21:16And that's when I started therapy because if I didn't do something the way that my brain
21:21would tell me to, something was going to happen.
21:22Like, not terrible.
21:23Like, not terrible.
21:24Like, if I didn't do something the way that my brain would tell me to, something was
21:27going to happen.
21:28Like, not terrible.
21:29Like, if that's going to happen on the way to the airport, I can only say certain things.
21:32I can only wear a certain pair of shoes.
21:34I have to sit in row 13 or 14 right over the wing in the aisle seat every time I get on the
21:37plane and I have to, like, look at the cockpit and make sure that all of the buttons are on.
21:40Not terrible, like, oh, I'm going to get an F in school.
21:44Terrible, like, I'm going to die.
21:45Somebody in my family is going to die.
21:47Car accidents, like, my brain goes AWOL.
21:50I can't really, like, enjoy anything.
21:52You're like a prisoner to your own thoughts.
21:55For me, everything has to feel perfect or else I will redo it 60 times.
21:59Like, if I were to throw that marker over there on the table and it were to land sideways,
22:04I'd flip it.
22:05Or I'd flip it again because it doesn't feel right.
22:07Or I'd twist it because it doesn't feel right.
22:09I need to do it again and throw it in the right angle at the right time at the right place.
22:12It's literally, like, mind controlling.
22:14Like, I'm in my own prison locked behind bars.
22:17No one knows or no one sees.
22:19It's, like, always constantly in your head.
22:22Uh-huh.
22:23That was a big struggle growing up, watching Balin deal with all of her own issues.
22:27And then also dealing with mine, it's almost like we both failed, my parents.
22:31How are we raised by two absolutely selfless, caring, supportive parents?
22:37And then we're both, like, down in the basement because we shared a room, like, struggling.
22:42But also in a way, like, I found comfort and safety within Balin because we did both struggle
22:46with kind of sort of the same things, even if they were a little bit different on each
22:50sides of the spectrum.
22:52I still do want to see you.
22:55And I also have a wedding to plan.
22:57And I need my maid of honor to do that.
22:59So...
23:00Okay, boo.
23:05Okay!
23:06Sammy knows that she's my maid of honor because, like, it would be so rude if I pick someone else
23:12over her.
23:13Like, no one gets her place.
23:15I'll go!
23:16I'm so excited.
23:22So are there any plans?
23:23Are there any wedding plans?
23:25What is...
23:26What's...
23:27I mean, it's like I think that they've been, like, scrolling online and glancing.
23:30That's the idea I'm getting from her.
23:32But you just hear within the next year.
23:35And things are different.
23:36Like, when we got married, we had...
23:37Like, if you're gonna get married in the church, the church makes you go through the
23:42counseling.
23:43And then after that, then you can set up your time.
23:45And then you...
23:46Like, it was kind of laid out for you.
23:48You had a plan.
23:49And Julie and I have talked about this.
23:51Even if it's not even called counseling.
23:53Maybe if it's just, you know, marriage guidance or whatever it is.
23:56I think that's something they should look into.
23:59It's not like something that you go, I wish I would have never went there.
24:02Nobody's gonna lay out in counseling or marriage guidance exactly how things are gonna pan out for you.
24:08Because people change over time.
24:10Your finances change over time.
24:12The demands of children and family.
24:14And, like, all of the things change and you change and develop as people.
24:18I think those are really important things that that third party will make them more aware of.
24:24Yeah.
24:25I just feel like that would be a bonus.
24:27And that's why I'm a really big fan of, like, mentioning it to them.
24:31I just don't want them to be offended.
24:34His family is very religious.
24:36Very.
24:37Very spiritual people.
24:38Yes.
24:39Good people.
24:40So they're probably going to want the same thing, okay?
24:43Where's your connection spiritually?
24:44Mm-hmm.
24:45Are they going to continue to live where they're at?
24:47I don't know.
24:48I don't know what all of those things are, but that's the whole premise of this.
24:53I feel a little bit in the dark.
24:55I think knowing what Colin wants to do after the military would be kind of a relief.
25:01But we don't want to be overbearing.
25:03Al was a little tough with him.
25:05He was, like, very in his face, like, this is my girl.
25:08And Colin so far has passed the test through Alan's toughness.
25:14But that doesn't mean that there isn't some, like, residual feelings of, like, you know, here your parents are kind of, you know, intervening in our life again.
25:25We're thinking about heading there this week and kind of introducing it to them.
25:33And I hope the talk doesn't go awry.
25:45Personally, I don't feel the best about going to the grocery store myself.
25:48Me and grocery stores have a very complicated relationship because of my tics.
25:54you, bitch.
25:56If I don't get my tics and anxiety under control, I'm going to end up on the ground.
26:03I am making my first homemade red velvet cake from scratch for Colin's 25th birthday.
26:21Colin has no idea. Colin's going to be really surprised.
26:24Do I want a cupcake?
26:34I love it so much.
26:36I love the sprinkles.
26:37I'll come back for you.
26:39Don't you worry.
26:40Personally, I don't feel the best about going to the grocery store myself.
26:43Because me and grocery stores have a very complicated relationship because of my tics.
26:48This isn't good for you because then you're a .
26:51You said a dead word .
26:54That hurt really bad.
26:55How are you going to do this when you're out on your own, Balin?
27:03But since me and Colin have been living with each other, there's one time where I go to the grocery store by myself.
27:08And every time that I go to the grocery store, it's different.
27:13Let's go find purpose flour.
27:17There's no signs, okay?
27:19I've been recorded throughout stores.
27:23People staring at me.
27:25Everyone noticing I'm different.
27:27It gives me a lot of anxiety to go out in public.
27:30Wait, I think there's vanilla pudding.
27:34Hold up.
27:35We got vanilla pudding.
27:37Wait, do I need jello or do I need pudding?
27:40What the is the difference?
27:43I don't want to this up.
27:45Is this pudding?
27:48I have never shopped for half these ingredients before.
27:51Buttermilk.
27:52That'd be like buttermilk pancakes or like...
27:55I don't think pancake mix goes in cakes.
27:59And I honestly have no idea what I'm looking for.
28:02Okay.
28:03Heavy whipping great mascarone cheese.
28:06Okay.
28:07None of that's down here.
28:08Did I pronounce that right?
28:10Masca...
28:11Mascaparone?
28:12Mascaparone?
28:17It's gotta be some French Italian bougie.
28:19Mascarone.
28:24Bread all purpose.
28:27I'm starting to get anxious.
28:28And my tics are acting up.
28:30And...
28:32Especially...
28:34My motor tics.
28:35Ha!
28:37And when my anxiety goes up...
28:42My OCD gets worse.
28:43I'm like really distracted right now.
28:45You bitch.
28:46Hey.
28:47Almond bitch.
28:48If I don't get my tics and anxiety under control...
28:49I won't be able to walk through the grocery store.
28:50Okay.
28:51Heavy whipping .
28:52I'm gonna end up on the ground.
28:55You bitch.
28:56If I want to finish this and get home...
28:57It's time to put these on.
28:58I need to put headphones on.
28:59Headphones and music is the one thing that soothes my tics.
29:00So it's kind of distracting your brain.
29:01So it's kind of distracting your brain.
29:02The type of music that I listen to to help my tics is...
29:06Country music, Christian music...
29:08Because they're soothing.
29:09I just want to do something that's...
29:11What's the mitt to do?
29:12What's the mitt to do?
29:13And then?
29:14What's the mitt to do?
29:15You bitch.
29:16Right.
29:17I'm like...
29:18Oh my god.
29:19He's in my mouth.
29:20I'm so glad I'm going.
29:21I'm so glad you're out.
29:22I'm so glad that I'm so glad I'm so glad.
29:24To get filled with your tics.
29:25To get in my head.
29:26So Magina, you know.
29:27Oh my God.
29:28I'm so glad you're trying.
29:29That's okay.
29:30I'm so glad I'm so glad I'm so glad I'm so glad.
29:31Kıntır music, kristiyan music because they're soothing.
29:35Ha, found the buttermilk.
29:37If I can put headphones on to ease my anxiety,
29:41it's almost like my body is calm.
29:47Mascarone cheese.
29:50Oh my god, I don't know if they have it.
29:53What's in this jar?
29:56No?
30:01I have a question.
30:04Yes?
30:05Where would the mascarone cheese be?
30:08It would be right there.
30:10Go, uh, I'll tell you where to stop.
30:12Okay.
30:13Little more, little more, little more.
30:15It should be right there.
30:16Huh, yes.
30:17Okay. Thank you.
30:18All right.
30:19It feels really good to push through something
30:21that I was scared to do in the first place.
30:27Oh my god, it smells so good.
30:28I'm getting two.
30:30Of course, the cupcake's a reward.
30:32When I do hard things, I give myself tweets.
30:35Oh no, no, no, no, no, no.
30:38I have Tourette's syndrome,
30:40so if you notice anything, just don't mind me.
30:43No, it's not good.
30:44It's not good.
30:45Okay.
30:46The shopping trip wasn't perfect,
30:50but it was successful.
30:52And I did it by myself.
30:53It takes time.
30:55Anything with time, anything with practice,
30:57like, I feel more comfortable.
30:59I don't like the name Mike.
31:00Oh, man.
31:01Oh, God, no.
31:04Now I got to go home and bake this sucker.
31:06You know?
31:07Oh.
31:09Oh.
31:10Shit.
31:11There we go.
31:13There we go.
31:14It's really nerve-wracking to bake your first cake from scratch.
31:19Weenie.
31:20Colin gets home from work at five.
31:22Wait, wait.
31:23My parents are coming later.
31:26I feel like it's a race against time.
31:28I'm more than nervous, actually.
31:30I'm living in a girl's dream world world.
31:42Can't wait to see where life takes me.
31:47But a girl can only dream.
31:52Mom!
31:53Mom!
31:54Oh!
31:55Oh, no!
31:56It's really nerve-wracking to bake your first cake from scratch
32:01for your significant other's birthday.
32:03Did me!
32:04I've used the oven before.
32:06Not a good idea.
32:07There was one time I made cookies.
32:12Listen, they were baking all night.
32:13What do you want me to say?
32:15I forgot to turn the oven off.
32:18That's not safe.
32:21But it's really important for me to be able to use the kitchen
32:26by also not hurting myself, hurting others,
32:30or burning down our whole apartment.
32:34What are you guys doing?
32:36Colin gets home from work at five.
32:38My parents are coming over later for his birthday.
32:40And I appreciate my parents making efforts
32:42to get closer to Colin.
32:45So that means I have a total of about five hours
32:48to finish this cake.
32:51You guys, that's what I could do!
32:53Thank God, I do have reinforcement.
32:56Oh, my goodness!
32:58Here, let me take this.
33:00Look at them, they look so cute!
33:02They got their hair cut for the baby!
33:04Oh, my goodness!
33:05They can see!
33:06Leela and I met off of a friendship-making app.
33:11I have everything laid out that I think we need.
33:13Perfect!
33:15I still talk to Eileen and Olivia.
33:17They're still very close people in my life.
33:20They're just out of state, so I don't see them as much,
33:23so I decided to sign up for a friendship app
33:25and meet new people.
33:27And we really just hit it off.
33:29We're very aligned in the head.
33:32Like, I get her, and she is very good with my tics.
33:38The vision may not be what we're actually replicating.
33:42Balen did not say that she had Tourette's Syndrome.
33:45on her friendship app profile.
33:47She texted me before we were about to go out to eat
33:50that she has Tourette's Syndrome.
33:52Look at this, step-by-step instructions.
33:54Preheat oven!
33:55I literally online looked it up,
33:58because I didn't want to offend Balen in any type of way,
34:00because she was really, like, the first person that I met
34:03who had Tourette's Syndrome.
34:04We're going to do a red velvet 2-5 cake,
34:07because he's turning 25.
34:09And then we're going to cut out these little pictures
34:11and stick them on sticks and put them in there.
34:13I never made something so extravagant before.
34:15He may get a 2-3 for his birthday, for all I know.
34:19Me and Balen have done cooking and baking in the past.
34:22We're doing teamwork.
34:23There you go. Do you want to try it?
34:24Yeah, I do.
34:25I've learned to be more helpful to her.
34:31You've got to be almost kind of ready for anything.
34:33OK, there we go.
34:36I try to be mindful and make it a bit safer.
34:43What did you just do?
34:44Oh, my God, smell that.
34:45Oh, my God!
34:46It feels like it's been left out for nine years.
34:49There is a lot of scents that set my tics off,
34:52and this is the first time I'm smelling buttermilk.
34:55This smells like Beckner's feet
34:57after his baseball game last week.
34:59Wait, wait, wait.
35:01There's trash.
35:02There's buttermilk.
35:0310 out of 10.
35:04Disgusting.
35:05Ever seen an egg crack this way?
35:07Weenie!
35:08Perfect.
35:09See that?
35:10Just two more times.
35:11Just two more?
35:12Yeah, don't put your hand there,
35:13because I don't want...
35:14That's going to hurt.
35:17Tap that weener. Tap the rotisserie chicken.
35:19I did so good for the longest time.
35:22I really did.
35:24Throughout the day,
35:25my tics always progress.
35:33He's going to love it.
35:34I think he will like it.
35:35It's just, when am I going to finish this?
35:39So this is going to bake for 30 minutes,
35:41and then we can get it all set up
35:42to where you can just do the decorating, you know?
35:45Okay.
35:46Yeah.
35:47It's a little ambitious.
35:48Perfect.
35:49Do you care putting both of them in?
35:50Yeah, I can do that.
35:51I can do that.
35:52I'll put it down a little.
35:53And I'm going to put a timer on my phone.
35:55I put it for 26 minutes instead of 25 minutes,
35:58because I do everything in three sixes or nines.
36:01And that's my OCD,
36:02is everything has to be in threes.
36:04It just makes sense in my head.
36:05Okay.
36:06It doesn't make sense in Collins,
36:08and Colin adjusts to it very, very well.
36:10It's literally constant.
36:11Yes, it's all day, every day.
36:13I didn't really know that she had OCD so aggressively.
36:18Even the time it has to be in threes,
36:20and I'm like, I cannot do that head math, so.
36:23Um, it's fine.
36:24It's fine.
36:25Oh, there's the timer.
36:32All right, let's check her out.
36:34Oh, she's done.
36:38You're done.
36:39You're done.
36:40I am very proud of Vaylin,
36:42because she's making progress to be more independent,
36:45and she's able to do more by herself now.
36:48Your mom squirted.
36:51I'm sorry.
36:53Okay, okay, my chair's gonna be here in three minutes.
36:57Send me a picture of it when it's done.
36:59I will.
37:00Love you.
37:01Sorry I couldn't stay longer, okay?
37:02No, you're fine.
37:03We didn't get very far.
37:04It's been a long time, but it's not,
37:06it didn't get very far.
37:07So, we'll see how it goes.
37:10I'm gonna get the door for you.
37:12Am I nervous?
37:13I'm more than nervous, actually,
37:15to have Leela leave
37:16and have me finish the cake by myself.
37:18Bye.
37:19Bye.
37:20Okay.
37:21I have a little bit of time.
37:22I hope.
37:24I feel like it's a race against time,
37:26and I'm a perfectionist.
37:28I just want you guys to know
37:29I have no idea what I'm doing.
37:30I hope you guys know that.
37:31Ah!
37:33Happy birthday.
37:34Thanks.
37:35Walking into the apartment for Colin's birthday
37:37were a little reserved
37:39to bring up marital counseling.
37:41I hope this goes as well as we've talked about.
37:44I think it would be a good tool to have.
37:47I'm sure this wasn't the birthday Colin was expecting.
37:51If you're over, it works be sweet.
37:52Then you went on and left us
37:53through the elementaryiziert
37:54and toys who talk as well as Geschm related.
37:55Yes!
37:56Now obviously I'm gonna go.
37:57You're not gonna.
37:58For my Kay and Mark's tho around $1 million-fin시간
37:59?
38:04Wee' a little baby.
38:06Don't look at me with that side eye.
38:09You're about to fall over, Toonie.
38:12Guys, why are you trying to take your crown off, Laf?
38:16You guys stay put for Colin.
38:18I'm going to get the cake.
38:22I'm really excited about the finished product and how it turned out.
38:26I'm ready to rumble!
38:29But the way that I had envisioned it was not the way that it turned out looking.
38:34Please do not mess up.
38:36Oh, my, please.
38:43Holy balls, man!
38:48It's up the whole cake.
38:51But it's for Colin, and if I see a smile on his face, that's all that matters.
39:00Happy birthday!
39:03What do you guys have on?
39:05Oh, my goodness!
39:07Oh, babe.
39:08What the heck?
39:09Babe, this is sick.
39:11How did you do all that?
39:12You got my sunburnt picture on there?
39:14Oh, yeah.
39:14You didn't need sunscreen.
39:16That's awesome.
39:17I was working on this all day, and I picked out 25 photos.
39:21Pumpkin still hasn't moved.
39:23Pumpkin.
39:24Oh, there you go.
39:26All better.
39:27Are you going to wear it?
39:28If I'm wearing one, you're going to wear one.
39:31This is cool, babe.
39:32Thank you so much.
39:33I wasn't making tiramisu.
39:35That's too much for the first time.
39:38Wait, you made this cake from scratch?
39:40Yeah.
39:40You didn't buy it?
39:41No.
39:42Wow, that's impressive.
39:44Baylen has always struggled with being in the kitchen.
39:47Um, so for her to spend all day making a cake, it just shows that she is trying to improve
39:54on her independence, and it just makes me super proud of her.
40:00Oh, my goodness.
40:01Hey, bitch.
40:02Hi.
40:03How are you doing, babe?
40:04Thanks for coming.
40:05Hey.
40:05Happy birthday, Colin.
40:06Thank you.
40:08Happy birthday, buddy.
40:09Thanks.
40:09Walking into the apartment for Colin's birthday were a little reserved to bring up marital counseling.
40:16Happy birthday.
40:16Thank you.
40:18This is not us criticizing or evaluating the relationship, so I hope this goes as well
40:24as we've talked about.
40:27So you made the cake?
40:29Me and Leela.
40:29Yeah.
40:30Oh, Leela came.
40:32Mm-hmm.
40:32It looks great.
40:33So this is how it started, and then I cut it with my plastic knives.
40:38Oh, my gosh.
40:39Stop.
40:39Yeah.
40:40It's surreal.
40:41It's unbelievable.
40:42I don't have the adjectives to describe how my mama heart feels.
40:45It was so much fun to make.
40:47I'm glad you liked it.
40:49Yeah.
40:49Where she's come in the last, I guess, even six months, but where she started from five,
40:55six years ago to this point is astounding, to say the least.
41:01Well, thanks for letting us ambush your birthday.
41:03Of course.
41:04Yeah.
41:04I definitely feel like Colin has improved Balen's self-confidence and overall well-being.
41:13This is good.
41:14I made it.
41:15That's really good.
41:16It tastes like ice cream.
41:17I'm not even a red velvet person, and I'm loving it.
41:19I think that you could make the wedding cake.
41:20We're sitting here, the mood is good, and I'm thinking to myself, they have no idea what
41:27we're about to tell them.
41:29We've practiced how we're going to articulate it enough so that I think our presentation is
41:35going to be smooth.
41:36I hope that it is perceived well.
41:39All right.
41:41So this is kind of off topic, but there is just something kind of important that Al and
41:49I would like to talk to you guys about.
41:52Mm-hmm.
41:52But don't be worried.
41:55Okay.
41:57So we have been talking about our marriage and, like, the steps of, you know, to where
42:09we're at and the parts of it that have made us successful, and it started with some premarital
42:16counseling.
42:19Mm-hmm.
42:22This isn't like a, like a, let's see if we fit, and if we don't, we're breaking up.
42:27That's not.
42:28It's more like.
42:29More like guidance, like, hey, this is what you're in for, right?
42:32Like, are you on the same, um, mindset and principles and fundamentals regarding things
42:39in life?
42:40And I don't want you guys to be offended, but I, I think, um, I think it would be a good
42:48tool to have.
42:49I had a conversation with my dad that I thought, well, well, so I'm confused with why they're
43:00bringing up counseling.
43:02I'm sure this wasn't the birthday Colm was expecting.
43:06Colm looks pissed.
43:07Yeah, I thought everything was fine, but this is definitely a curveball.
43:15Do they think our relationship is not in good standing?
43:19I can't look at the chickens.
43:31Chase after the weenie.
43:33Joe Biden does crystal math.
43:36I have Tourette's syndrome, stupid.
43:38Tourette's syndrome is a neurological involuntary motor and vocal disorder.
43:42You're bald, Chuck.
43:43Thank you.
43:44Just in case you weren't aware already.
43:45Yeah.
43:46I would like to have a bouncy house at the wedding.
43:48Are you four years old?
43:50Two girls' night.
43:53Oh, my God.
43:55I'm not like every other bride.
43:57Have you guys ever had alpacas at a wedding?
44:00Nice to meet you.
44:01Nice to meet you.
44:02I'm the owner here.
44:04Dick.
44:05You okay?
44:07Eat a bag of chips.
44:09In thinking about your budget, you're not going to love what I have to tell you.
44:13What if we can't have our dream wedding?
44:15I would be devastated.
44:18We're making the right decision, right?
44:21I don't know, are we?
44:23Oh, my God!
44:24Oh, my God!
44:26What do you think?
44:29It's amazing.
44:30I want her to be able to say,
44:32this is the best day ever.
44:35Each time I come.
44:37Give me the world to me, okay?
44:40Maybe you're lying, and I'm ready to roll.
44:44You guys are getting married.
44:45You're going to eventually want children.
44:47I get a steady paycheck in the military,
44:50and my contract will be expiring in about a year.
44:55A medical plan is probably the number one thing when it comes to jobs.
45:00Our father, he's having a lot of influence on our lives right now.
45:07His life is tough.
45:08You add children.
45:10them kids.
45:11Please don't be offended.
45:13My parents bringing up premarital counseling.
45:15Kind of just felt weird.
45:16We're going one step forward and three steps back.
45:18Let's be honest here.
45:19Let's be honest, bitch.
45:20I'm choosing a career that your dad told me not to choose.
45:24It's a lot of pressure.
45:26Suck a .
45:27I literally don't want to be in the middle of it.
45:30If this doesn't work out, what are you going to do?
45:33Is this what our marriage is going to be like?
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