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Mortimer and Whitehouse Gone Fishing S08E07br br RealityTVDeepbr
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00:00so Paul we're on a steam train what does that mean I think it means it's Christmas
00:08it's the Christmas show yeah yeah but it's not very Christmassy out there Bob yeah well it isn't
00:13but it's the Christmas show right do you know where we're headed I'll tell you where we're
00:21heading we're heading to the center of Christmas this year all right and who decides where it's
00:26centered me of course do you know where it might be give us a clue Ted's got a little hint oh right
00:36okay it's a Cornish pasty we're going to Cornwall Wow nice we're gonna actually on our way to go
00:49and we'll fish on a beautiful river called the River Lid in Devon they will be fishing in Cornwall
00:54really yeah we've got the award ceremony special Christmas dinner some beautiful accommodation
01:00right for our Cornish Christmas adventure lovely this carriage is called a Pullman carriage fantasy
01:08yeah it was the personal carriage of Winston Churchill and it was in this carriage that he
01:14had a meeting with General Eisenhower to discuss the D-Day landings we might be in their seats we
01:19might be in the church we'll be facing forward I've got to am I you silly egg did you call me a silly egg
01:25no no no no no no no
01:26so
01:37oh
01:39yeah
01:42Come, Ted.
01:57Good boy.
01:58I said, what a cunt of devil.
02:00You told me we was going to Cornwall.
02:02We're on our way to Cornwall, Ted.
02:04Drag me down some muggy old river.
02:06What's the matter with you, Long River?
02:09Any other one, I forgot his name, to be honest.
02:12So this is it, Paul.
02:14Yeah.
02:14The River Laird.
02:15Yeah, beautiful, isn't it, Bob?
02:17I'll start down there.
02:18You get in there, yeah?
02:20Rightio.
02:21What are we fishing for, though?
02:22Well, trout and sea trout as well.
02:26Look, we've got one of those views, Paul, through there.
02:28Oh, we have.
02:29It's a portal, isn't it?
02:30It's a portal to the Magic Kingdom.
02:33Yeah.
02:34Right.
02:34Let's do it.
02:42Do you have roast potatoes and mashed potatoes with your Christmas dinner, Paul?
03:04I would, if I was offered it.
03:07You know, in Cornwall, they like to have a bit of fish.
03:11Really?
03:11What are they, French?
03:13Turbot or halibut, that sort of thing.
03:15Oh, yeah, nice.
03:24Ah!
03:26Are you caught again?
03:28Oh, thank God.
03:29You get it?
03:30Yeah.
03:34Would you describe me as fat?
03:37No.
03:39I'm overweight, but you say there's a fat bloke over there.
03:43Well, you're not really, Bob.
03:44You've got a sort of big, round head, haven't you?
03:47But you're not fat, no.
03:50Oh, he's in.
03:52Oh, oh.
03:54Oh.
03:54Ah!
03:56Ah!
03:56Ah!
03:57Ah!
03:57Ah!
03:59Ah!
04:00Oh, Bob, you all right, mate?
04:01I'm absolutely fine, Bob.
04:03Are you?
04:03I'm wet.
04:04It was a bit cold as well, wasn't it?
04:06Fat and wet.
04:08Lucky you had that layer of blubber there for buoyancy.
04:12Bloody hell, Bob, you all right?
04:14Yeah, no, I'm fine.
04:16Go on, go and suck yourself out.
04:23Did you hurt yourself, Guy, any?
04:24I took a bit of a bang on the, um...
04:26On the rump.
04:27On the rump.
04:29On the rump.
04:30I've got one rump and one butter.
04:32Are you?
04:33Unusual, isn't it?
04:34It is very unusual.
04:35Oh, man.
04:40I'll tell you what, with Christmas this year, Bob, here's a little thing for you.
04:43Oh, yeah, go on.
04:44I don't think my Christmases will ever be the same.
04:47Yeah.
04:49Last Christmas, on Christmas Day, Grandad, me father-in-law, was in hospital.
04:55Yeah.
04:55And so on Christmas Day, me and my son took him his present.
04:59It was a nice little steam train calendar.
05:01Oh, yeah.
05:02But when we got there, he was fast asleep.
05:04Ah, right.
05:05And couldn't be roused, so we just said, happy Christmas to him.
05:08And took the present back?
05:09No, we gave him the present for when he woke up and that.
05:12Yeah.
05:12And then when we got home, there was a phone call from the ward, and he died by the time
05:20we got home.
05:23We sort of thought to ourselves, me and Tom, my son, that maybe, just maybe, he heard us
05:29say happy Christmas.
05:31Yeah.
05:31And then say goodbye.
05:33Yeah.
05:33And he thought, all right, I'll turn off now, then.
05:35That was nice.
05:36Well, it's possible, isn't it?
05:37It's possible.
05:38Mm.
05:38You know, maybe.
05:39On Christmas Day.
05:40On Christmas Day.
05:42He liked steam engines and he liked beer.
05:48There's plenty of them about, isn't there?
05:49That's a man, isn't it?
05:50Yeah.
05:51Rod Stewart, he likes steam engines and beer, doesn't he?
05:54Yeah.
05:54Apparently.
05:55It's a type, isn't it?
05:56It is a type.
05:57MUSIC PLAYS
06:12That's too close in, I think.
06:25Oh!
06:27I'm in, Bob.
06:28You're in?
06:29You're in?
06:29Yep.
06:29What were you thinking, little trout?
06:32Not.
06:33It's not so little.
06:34And I don't know what it is yet.
06:36Well done, man.
06:37First Christmas catch.
06:39I think it's a Grayling.
06:42Yes!
06:43It's a good Grayling.
06:44I think it's a Grayling, yeah.
06:46It is a Grayling.
06:46It's a nice one, isn't it?
06:47Oh, Bob, look at him.
06:49Come on, get him.
06:50Yes!
06:52Oh, Paul, it's a whopper.
06:54That is the biggest one we've ever caught.
06:56It is, isn't it? Look at that.
06:58See this fin?
06:59That's so beautiful, isn't it?
07:01Right. Let's get him back.
07:03Beautiful creature.
07:05Beautiful creature.
07:07There you go.
07:09And away.
07:11Well done, Paul.
07:12God, it's cold that water, isn't it?
07:13Lovely.
07:14Are we having a cup of tea, darling?
07:16Yes, I'd love a cup of tea.
07:17I've got some special treats.
07:18Come on in.
07:19Christmas treats for you.
07:20Oh, nice.
07:27So this is me Christmas spread.
07:29Wow, look at that.
07:30Yule log, gingerbread man.
07:33That one's me.
07:34That one's you.
07:35Okay.
07:36Obviously.
07:37Yeah.
07:38Look what I've got here, Paul.
07:40Ooh.
07:41Minced pies heating by the camping stove.
07:43Ooh.
07:45Come on, Teddy.
07:47It's nothing to do with you, Ted.
07:49Yeah, but it is.
07:50Yeah, but it is.
07:51Yeah, but it is.
07:52No, it's nothing to do with you.
07:53It has nothing to do with you to it.
07:54Yeah, but it is.
07:55Yeah, but it is.
07:57Nicely judged.
07:58Mr. Minced pie, as they call you.
08:00It's really heated for a while, isn't it?
08:03There you go, Teddy.
08:04I have got some cream.
08:06Stop.
08:07Whoa.
08:08Do you want a bit of squirty cream?
08:09I wonder if he squirted it into his mouth.
08:11He'd just keep going.
08:12And he'd grow up.
08:13Yeah.
08:14And then.
08:17Exactly.
08:26I'll have a go, yeah.
08:27You've got a fish with a nymph, right?
08:28Well, there's one grayling.
08:29There's more.
08:30There's more.
08:31Yeah.
08:32Those berries, right?
08:33Whoa, that's beautiful, you lucky sod.
08:36Right, keep that line off the water.
08:39Track it down.
08:43Give that little line a mend.
08:44That's it, like that.
08:45That's good.
08:49Another calf.
08:50Oh, boom, boom.
08:51Oh, nice.
08:53That's good fish, Bob.
08:54It's a good fish.
08:55I know it's a good fish.
08:56I can see it is.
08:57I think he might have a seat right there or a big gray.
09:00It's a good fish.
09:01Go on and try and get it on the reel.
09:03But mainly keep contact.
09:04Okay.
09:05So now don't wind.
09:06That's a good fish, Bob.
09:07I'm on the reel.
09:08Oh.
09:13Right, you can wind a little bit.
09:14Go on.
09:16Have you got the net?
09:17Yeah.
09:20I haven't even seen it yet, Bob, have you?
09:22No.
09:23It's too big to see.
09:26It's a massive trout.
09:28All right.
09:29All right.
09:30Come on.
09:31Oh, please don't go.
09:32Come on.
09:33No, come on, come on.
09:34We've got to get this fish.
09:35Come on.
09:36Come on.
09:37Oh, yes!
09:38Boom!
09:39Boom!
09:41Whoa!
09:42Look at the size of him.
09:43The line.
09:44Wow.
09:45That's a lovely sea trout, Bob.
09:47Look at it.
09:48You can.
09:49I think we're talking records here, Paul.
09:51I'm going to get onto the mare.
09:53Oh, we'll get him back.
09:54Yeah.
09:55What a magnificent fish.
09:56Wow.
09:57Well done, Bob.
09:59Hold him till he's ready.
10:01I think he'll be gone soon, but...
10:04And away!
10:06Not going to get better than that, Paul.
10:08No, it ain't, Bob.
10:09Let's go to the accommodation.
10:10Okay.
10:11Our first Christmas accommodation.
10:12Thank you for that, sir.
10:13Well done, mate.
10:14I don't know if I can move, really, but...
10:15Ooh, there's a big lump here.
10:16And I don't mean me.
10:17Hey!
10:19All right.
10:21Oh, that sea trout, Paul.
10:25Yeah.
10:26That's going to haunt you for years.
10:27He tugged you, didn't he, eh?
10:29Lime.
10:30You're never going to let it lie, are you?
10:32Never.
10:33No.
10:41I thought for Christmas, I'd bring you somewhere...
10:44Yeah.
10:45...so special, it would rip your heart out of your body.
10:49Cleanse it and return it fully functioning.
10:51Oh, let's hope so.
10:52It needs a bit of an upgrade, Bob, really.
10:54Because this place is gorgeous.
10:56Whoa!
10:57Is that the sea?
10:58And...
10:59Wow.
11:00...to your right here, Camel Quarry House.
11:03Oh!
11:04Look at that!
11:06Well, thank you, Bob.
11:07Our best yet.
11:08It's a beauty!
11:09Could be.
11:10Cornish beauty.
11:11Come on.
11:15Whoa!
11:18Tally tick.
11:19Come on.
11:20See the bedrooms.
11:21Go on in.
11:22Up you go.
11:23You sprite the old fella.
11:24Oh, yeah.
11:25I'm going to take a chance on a left.
11:28No.
11:29Oh, this one is very me, Paul.
11:31I've chosen.
11:32But I'll join you on your quest.
11:34Come on.
11:35Yes.
11:37Oh, I've made a terrible mistake, Paul.
11:39You have, Bob.
11:40Feel free to enjoy the view for about eight seconds.
11:44Eight seconds is not enough.
11:46Come on, Bob.
11:47You've seen enough.
11:48Come on.
11:49You've got the best room.
11:50Come on.
11:51Out.
11:52Upstairs.
11:53I think.
11:54Ooh.
11:55Whoa!
11:56Whoa!
11:57Whoa!
11:59Boom!
12:00Yeah.
12:01Boom, banger, bang, boom.
12:02Isn't that something?
12:04Wow.
12:05I feel like we've arrived.
12:07Because that is Cornwall.
12:09That's the Camel Estuary.
12:10Yeah.
12:11And it's most beautiful.
12:12Rit large, isn't it?
12:13Got a special guest coming soon.
12:17Any minute now, in fact.
12:18Yeah.
12:19So, behave yourself.
12:20Can you get rid of your windy pops now?
12:22Ha-ha-ha!
12:36Do you like the look of this, Paul?
12:37Char-coot-tree is what they call it.
12:40Char-coot-tree.
12:41Char-coot-tree.
12:42Char-coot-tree.
12:43That's Ted's.
12:44Dog biscuits and a bit of cheese.
12:45Oh, right.
12:46Did he do that?
12:47Absolutely, yeah.
12:48The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want.
12:53He maketh me to lie down in the...
12:58Ching, ching, ching.
12:59Ching, ching, ching, ching.
13:00Who can it be?
13:01Ching, ching, ching.
13:03It's Christmas!
13:04Oh, thank you for coming.
13:06It's a bloody holder.
13:07Hello!
13:08Hello, love.
13:09Hi there.
13:10How are you?
13:11Yeah, I'm all right, darling.
13:12Could you come on that side, actually, at the same time?
13:14Why don't you want the...
13:15I just want to be in a sort of sandwich.
13:17Oh, that's lovely.
13:18A couple of chunks, you are.
13:20Hunky chunks.
13:21What you brought with?
13:22Do you want to see what this is?
13:23Go on in.
13:24My husband has made you this.
13:25It's a cake.
13:26Yes.
13:27It's a fruit, it's sultana and cherries.
13:29Lovely.
13:30With icing on the top.
13:31Because...
13:32Well, he knows about you, too.
13:34Oh, that's nice.
13:35I mean, he likes you, but I like you more.
13:37Right.
13:38He knows that both of you are on my I'm allowed to list.
13:42No!
13:43You're kidding.
13:44Yeah.
13:45Let's get to it!
13:46Come on!
13:47But it is only if he's conked.
13:49Oh, right.
13:50And if you were both single, which you're not.
13:52Yeah.
13:53Yeah, so it's not going to happen, obviously.
13:54No, it's not, is it?
13:55No.
13:56But, you know.
13:57So, we've got a cake in lieu, have we?
13:58Yeah, you have.
13:59I'll bring this over.
14:00Right, come on.
14:01You come in turns.
14:06So, this is Cornwall.
14:07This is your parish, isn't it?
14:09Yeah.
14:10Well, it's a tricky one for me, this, because half of my family are from Devon.
14:14Boo!
14:15Oh!
14:16And half are from Cornwall, so...
14:17Boo!
14:18Oh, no, sorry.
14:19Hooray!
14:20Hooray!
14:21So, I'm sort of dual heritage.
14:22It's a bit War of the Roses, kind of...
14:26You're quite synonymous with Christmas.
14:28Well, I suppose so.
14:29I suppose so.
14:30The free Christmas dinners.
14:31Yeah?
14:32Yeah.
14:33Did you actually really eat free Christmas dinners?
14:34Well, you know how they make telly.
14:36I ate one Brussels sprout.
14:38You're joking, mate.
14:39In that whole thing.
14:40Oh, you've broken his heart.
14:41Oh!
14:42Boy, I will!
14:43Don, will you ever do another Dibley, do you think?
14:46No?
14:47There's only one person left, but...
14:49Mmm!
14:50There's only James left out of the whole cast.
14:52Wow.
14:53Imagine that.
14:54That's what happens when you start a sitcom with older people.
14:56Yeah.
14:57Bob gone fishing on his own.
14:58Yeah.
14:59Yeah.
15:00Laughing at my demise.
15:01Not necessarily on your own, Bob.
15:02I'm here.
15:03I'm not great at Christmas, you know.
15:06It's not that I don't like it.
15:08I think, as I've got older, and I've lost people in my family, I find Christmas, when
15:13you're supposed to be jolly, too much.
15:15Yeah.
15:16So, I get a bit melancholy just before Christmas.
15:18But then, every single Christmas, there is a proper Christmas miracle.
15:23And it might just be that I, you know, get myself out of a grump because it's not fair
15:28on everybody else, but I actually do cheer up by Christmas Day.
15:31By Christmas Day.
15:32Oh, that's good.
15:33But the week before, I have a bit of a slump.
15:35I think the weird thing for me is that Christmas takes you back to childhood until I miss my
15:39mum and dad at Christmas.
15:41Yeah.
15:46Can I offer you anything from the shampoo tray?
15:47Yeah, you can.
15:48I'll have a bit of salami.
15:49Do you know what?
15:50I'll move it over, Dawn, then you're not...
15:52Ted?
15:53Ted?
15:54Here, look.
15:55Look what I've got.
15:56So...
15:57Try this, Ted, look.
15:59There we go.
16:00Oh, the enderbite's working hard on that.
16:03Oh!
16:10Cornwall, the most beautiful county, Dawn.
16:12Dawn.
16:13Oh, yes.
16:14No question.
16:15And can I just say...
16:16Yeah.
16:17...jam first, always, no exceptions.
16:19Just leave it at that.
16:20Well, I do agree.
16:21I don't think you can consider cream or butter.
16:24Correct, Bob.
16:25You can't.
16:26I'm not getting drawn in on this.
16:27Cream is the crown.
16:28Do you fancy staying for a game of mousetrap, Dawn?
16:32Um, no.
16:33Come on, Dawn, it's going to be great.
16:35No.
16:36Do you fancy coming in a hot tub with us?
16:38Um...
16:39I'd rather put my eyes out, if that's all right with you.
16:42Fair enough.
16:44I sense where you're coming from.
16:46I mean that nicely.
16:47Oh, I know.
16:48I said, don't ask, Bob, didn't I?
16:51And you were right.
16:52You were right.
17:09Did you have a nice sleep?
17:10Not bad, yeah.
17:11We've got to get going.
17:12I know, we never got fish.
17:13Oh, I forgot, Paul.
17:14What I should say is, I didn't forget,
17:17but I've got the last three windows of my advent calendar to open.
17:20Oh.
17:21Do you want to do one?
17:22You do today, I'll do tomorrow.
17:23That's nice, isn't it, Bob? I like that.
17:25It's a good one, isn't it?
17:26Yeah.
17:27Good things, isn't it?
17:28Great things.
17:29Mainly chocolates.
17:30Right.
17:31But little bits of fun jewellery.
17:32Oh, trinkets.
17:33Trinkets.
17:34OK.
17:36What do you get?
17:38A little bit of breadstick.
17:40Oh, that's a bit unlucky, isn't it?
17:42This is a trick, isn't it?
17:43No, it's not.
17:44You've enjoyed it, haven't you, little breadstick, Bob?
17:46I do like breadstick, yeah.
17:48We've got to get going.
17:49That is the estuary of the river we're fishing today,
17:52the river Camel.
17:53Yeah, we're fishing upstream.
17:54Mm.
17:55Mm.
17:56I'll be able to go all day after this breadstick,
17:58won't I?
17:59The breadstick!
18:00Don't worry, I've got some stuff to take.
18:01How are we, lad?
18:03It was a treat to Ian, Don, last night, wasn't it?
18:06It was lovely.
18:07She's a very positive presence, isn't she?
18:08Yes, yes, she is, yeah.
18:09Big, big day, though, Paul, innit?
18:10Awards ceremony.
18:11Oh!
18:12Big, big day.
18:13Who's hosting this year?
18:14Do you know?
18:15I think I'll host it this year.
18:16Oh, what a surprise!
18:17It means we couldn't get anyone, did it?
18:18Here we are.
18:20Lovely, innit?
18:21This is the Camel Valley, Bob, the river Camel.
18:23Right.
18:24In Tresarap's we are.
18:25And on the menu today...
18:26Yeah.
18:27Trap.
18:28Trap.
18:29Seatrap.
18:30Yeah.
18:31Trap.
18:32Trap.
18:33Seatrap.
18:34Yeah.
18:35Trap.
18:36Yeah.
18:37Trap.
18:38Trap.
18:39Yeah.
18:40Yeah.
18:41Yeah.
18:42Possibly salmon.
18:43Lovely.
18:44It's coming on Christmas, they're cutting down trees.
18:49They're putting up reindeer singing songs of joy and peace.
18:55I wish I had a river.
18:58I wish I had a river.
19:00I wish I had a river.
19:02I wish I had a river.
19:03I wish I had a river.
19:05I wish I had a river.
19:08I wish I had a river.
19:10I wish I had a river.
19:12I could skate away on.
19:18But it don't snow here.
19:20It just stays pretty green.
19:22I'm gonna make a lot of money.
19:24I'm gonna make a lot of money.
19:25And I'm gonna...
19:26What, did you miss one?
19:27Yeah.
19:28Oh.
19:29I wish I had a river.
19:31I could skate away on.
19:35I wish I had a river.
19:37I wish I had a river.
19:39I wish I had a river so long.
19:41Oh, I've got Mr.
19:42Oh, man.
19:43I wish I had a river.
19:44Teach my feet to.
19:46Fly.
19:47Yes.
19:48Hey, well done, Bob.
19:49Little brownie.
19:50I could skate away on.
19:51Very nice.
19:52And away.
19:53Hey.
19:54Oh, it was an incredible bit of fishing, Paul.
19:55Yeah, I'm sure it was, Bob.
19:56If you did it, I'm sure it was superlative.
19:57Good stuff.
19:58Good stuff.
19:59I would say, Paul, that's a good one.
20:00That's a good one.
20:01That's a good one.
20:02And away.
20:03Hey.
20:04Oh, it was an incredible bit of fishing, Paul.
20:07Yeah, I'm sure it was, Bob.
20:08If you did it, I'm sure it was superlative.
20:11Good stuff.
20:12I would say, Paul, that was maybe my most enjoyable bit of fishing I've ever done.
20:31Really?
20:32It was fantastic, yeah.
20:33Oh, brilliant.
20:34I don't know, just somewhat about the flow of the river and the light.
20:38The light is incredible here, isn't it?
20:40Yeah.
20:41You look so sexy in those glasses, Paul.
20:46Honestly, you look nothing like Ant-Man.
20:49Shut up.
20:50Or some sort of insect.
20:51I do look like a wasp or something, don't I?
20:53Yeah, you're a very waspy character, actually.
20:55Oh, blimey, Ted.
20:57What are we going to do with him?
20:59Ted isn't in great nature.
21:01No, all right, Bob.
21:02He's in here shortly.
21:03Mind you, he's quite deaf now.
21:05Yeah.
21:06But he doesn't look very well, does he?
21:08But he does seem happy.
21:10He does, actually, doesn't he?
21:11He does seem happy.
21:12Well, I'd say content.
21:13Content.
21:18When my son went to see Grandad in hospital afterwards, he said to me he was glad he had,
21:24because he said, I've got to get used to loss, you know?
21:28Oh, wow.
21:30When he was a really young boy, I, suddenly, one day I walked up the stairs and there was a window there.
21:35Hmm.
21:36And he put, he put, stuck little letters up saying, Tina, see you, see you in the future.
21:42And it was our little cat Tina had died.
21:44Oh, wow.
21:45And I know he was really affected by it.
21:47Right.
21:48And it's tough when you, it's tough when a pet dies.
21:51Yeah.
21:52It was really tough.
21:53Hmm.
21:54Because as your friendships come and go, you know, or you've got to, you've failed to maintain them or you do,
21:58Yeah.
21:59You know, but your friendship with your pet is so pure, do you know what I mean?
22:02Oh, no, that's a very valid point.
22:04It's the devotion that they show you don't get from any other living creature, really, do you?
22:10Heartbreaking.
22:11Hmm.
22:17It is brilliant to have a friend like you, you know, Paul.
22:20Don't have a go at me for saying it.
22:22It's amazing.
22:23Ant man, wasp face, wizened little walnut.
22:27Yeah, but...
22:28Yeah?
22:29That's because you like me, that you allow me to do it.
22:32I can take it, Bob, really.
22:34I really can take it.
22:35Don't worry, man.
22:36Imagine a world without friendship, because a lot of people live in that world, Paul.
22:39Well, yeah, that's true, Bobby.
22:41I'm just hanging on to it with you.
22:43You are fingernails, innit?
22:44But, well, thanks for that, Bob, and I feel the same.
22:46You know that, don't you?
22:48You do know that, don't you, Bob?
22:50We only come out to see each other, really.
22:52Yeah.
23:06Hey, Teddy.
23:09Dr Anand's coming today.
23:12Oh, right, he's here, is he?
23:13Yeah.
23:14Oh, okay.
23:16Don't you tell Anand I've been having salami.
23:19Oh, he won't like that, will he?
23:21Well, I've just had a chocolate biscuit.
23:23That's probably not much good, either.
23:24You're going to mention it, aren't you?
23:26No, I'm not.
23:27We'll see.
23:28We'll see how it all plays out, Bob.
23:29I know what you're like, so...
23:30You think the first thing I'm going to say to Anand is,
23:32Paul's just had a chocolate biscuit in Anand.
23:34Paul's just had a chocolate biscuit in Anand.
23:35And it's not.
23:36The first thing I'll say is, you know what Paul's done?
23:41He's only gone and had a chocolate biscuit, hasn't he?
23:45Anandos, and I should say, oh, that's fine.
23:47Anandos?
23:48Chicken and prescriptions.
23:53I really haven't had Anandos.
23:55Anand.
23:56Chickens and prescriptions.
24:03Anand!
24:04There he is.
24:05I'm following Ted in.
24:06Look, Ted's leading the way.
24:07Oh, easy.
24:08Easy.
24:09I've got trainers on.
24:10How are we?
24:11How lovely to see you.
24:12Lovely to be seen.
24:13I don't want to trip over Ted.
24:14I don't want to trip over Ted.
24:18You look like one of the prettiest gnomes I've ever seen.
24:21Don't you think?
24:22Look.
24:23Thanks.
24:24A wood nymph.
24:25I'll take that in whatever spirit you're going to.
24:27All day long.
24:28Yeah, yeah.
24:29Fine.
24:30So, Anand, the first thing I wanted to ask genuinely is,
24:32Sure.
24:33is just earlier today, Paul had two chocolate biscuits and some cake.
24:40Right, first of all, it was one chocolate biscuit.
24:43Was it?
24:44And I just had a little cherry out of the cake.
24:46That's all I nibbled, right?
24:48He had cake and salami.
24:50Wow.
24:51I'm not here to police you.
24:53Well, we wish you would.
24:55People don't like being nagged.
24:56Yeah.
24:57So, what I'm here to do is I'm here to steer you, hopefully, in a direction.
25:00And if you want to take my advice, take my advice.
25:01If you don't want it, that's absolutely fine.
25:03But equally, you know, we've all got to make our choices and deal with the consequences.
25:07It is a bit of compromise, isn't it?
25:08I was always told if 80% of your diet is good, you're allowed 20% to do, you know, indulge yourself.
25:14See, I tell myself 70-30, so I give myself a little bit more leeway.
25:17Well, there we are. I'm coming over to your way.
25:19Just some general things that have interested me recently, Anand, was a lot of people around me are taking vitamin supplements.
25:27Yes.
25:28All sorts of supplements. Somehow, I don't believe that that pill or liquid is the same as a leaf of spinach.
25:34I don't think it is. I don't think it is, Bob.
25:36So, you're absolutely right. Supplements are brilliant if you've got a deficient diet.
25:41The supplements you need need to be tailored to your age range, and they need to be tailored to whatever disease is going on.
25:47Or your diet, for example. If you're vegetarian or vegan, you might lack protein, you might lack calcium if you don't eat dairy.
25:54So, it's kind of like, well, what do we need? And if you're a 70-kilo, 65-year-old, you need to be taking 70 to 80 grams of protein per day.
26:01You should be getting some of that, if you eat meat, from meat, a bit of oily fish, lentils, pulses, eggs, cheese.
26:08You know, all those sources are good sources of protein.
26:11And why particularly for older people?
26:13So, as you get older, your ability to hold on to muscle gets less.
26:16So, you get something, what's called sarcopenia, where literally your muscles start to dissolve away as you get older.
26:21And having poorer muscle strength, which we're going to test in a bit, is linked to living longer.
26:26So, actually, if your muscle strength is poorer, you actually become frail.
26:30And frailty is basically a condition where any small change to your health could knock you over into losing independent living.
26:36And that could be like, you know, you can't live in your own home anymore. You can't do stairs.
26:39So, I've got a little testing thing here. We're just going to use your grip strength.
26:43And they did a study of 150,000 people, and they found that your grip strength is a better marker of your long-term health than your blood pressure.
26:51Really?
26:52So, that's why I brought it today, just to see, because it's such an easy thing to do.
26:55Yeah, yeah, yeah.
26:56You can get these online so easily.
26:57I'm excited.
26:58Do you want to have a go?
26:59Yeah.
27:00You want it.
27:01So, the idea is that you hold it like that at right angles.
27:03Right.
27:04Okay?
27:05And what you're doing is squeezing as hard as you can when I say now.
27:08Okay.
27:09Ready?
27:10And on three.
27:11One, two, three, go.
27:12Squeeze, squeeze, squeeze, squeeze, squeeze, squeeze, squeeze, squeeze, squeeze, squeeze.
27:15Good man.
27:1628.2.
27:17Yeah, well, that's the bad one.
27:20Obviously, this is not necessarily the perfect test if you've got hand arthritis.
27:23Yeah, yeah.
27:24But 28.2, what that means is that you have a level of sort of hand strength and fitness that is above the minimum level,
27:30which is really important.
27:31The minimum level for men is kind of about 25 kilograms and it's 18 for women.
27:37Right.
27:38If yours is below that, you're actually really at high risk of having low muscle mass.
27:41You're more likely to fall over, more likely to break your hip, more likely to lose your mobility and more likely to end up in a home.
27:47So, it's really important.
27:48I'm worried now.
27:49You're going to smash me to bases on this.
27:51Right.
27:52So, squeeze, squeeze, squeeze, squeeze, squeeze, squeeze, squeeze, squeeze, squeeze, squeeze, squeeze, squeeze.
27:55Done.
27:5643.
27:5743!
27:58Jeez, I'll never hear the end of this.
28:00I knew it.
28:01Can I just say, that is the sign of a healthy level of muscle at your age.
28:06What?
28:07That's fantastic.
28:08Oh, please.
28:0943.9.
28:10That's amazing.
28:11Fifteen seconds ago, I thought I'm heading to a care home.
28:14No, mate, no.
28:15Now I'm striding past it saying, hello, Paul.
28:17Yeah.
28:19Hey, Lan, would you have a bit of mulled wine?
28:22I'd love a bit of mulled wine.
28:24I made this myself on my farm.
28:26No, you didn't.
28:27Correct.
28:31Brilliant.
28:32Well, thank you so much for coming.
28:33Yeah.
28:34Merry Christmas.
28:35For our bag-side consultations.
28:36They're a joy.
28:37Mm-hmm.
28:38Look how pleased you are.
28:41Yeah.
28:55There's a kind of musty smell around.
28:58I think it's...
28:59I can only imagine it's you, Bob.
29:02Be slightly more...
29:03What do you mean?
29:04Is it biscuity?
29:05Is it biscuit?
29:06Oxo-cubin old man.
29:08Yeah.
29:09Well, I had an oxo-cubin with biscuits, and I'm an old man.
29:11And you're an old man.
29:12Well, there we are.
29:13Got it spot on, then.
29:17Let's have a smell of you.
29:18Go on, then.
29:20What do you reckon?
29:21Don't know.
29:22Have you been eating eggs?
29:24Oh, no.
29:25That's probably trapped wind in me waders, isn't it?
29:27Oh, that's great.
29:28Yeah.
29:31I'm going to have to go off and get the awards ceremony ready.
29:34Oh, OK.
29:35Be smart, though, Paul.
29:37Yeah?
29:38What, for the awards?
29:39Yeah, and be respectful of the occasion.
29:40I've arranged transport for you.
29:42Don't you worry.
29:43Well, will the occasion respect me?
29:45Of course it will.
29:47Ish.
29:48Yeah.
29:50See you at the awards, Paul.
29:52I cannot wait.
29:54We should have an award for wrist strength.
29:56The hopes we had were much too high.
30:02Way out of reach, but we have to try.
30:08The game will never be over.
30:12Because we're keeping the dream alive.
30:17How are you?
30:18How are you?
30:19Lovely to see you.
30:20You're OK.
30:21Lovely to see you.
30:22I'm fine.
30:23Welcome.
30:24Thanks for having us, Paul.
30:25Yeah.
30:26I was actually looking for Rick Steyer's place.
30:28Yeah.
30:29Just down there.
30:31But, listen, I am absolutely honoured that you've chosen us for these prestigious awards.
30:36They're just awards.
30:37And aren't they?
30:38Yeah, they are.
30:39So come on in.
30:41A Cornish Christmas dinner, that's what we're looking for.
30:51Yeah.
30:52Well, this is a Cornish Christmas dinner.
30:53Right.
30:54With a difference, because we're going to replace what people would ordinarily probably have in,
30:58you know, turkey, hams, beef.
31:00Yep.
31:01We're going to do a whole baked turbot, but with all the trimmings.
31:04Yeah.
31:05And a lovely sort of turbot chicken gravy.
31:07Wow.
31:08Which you're going to help me to do.
31:09Yes, please.
31:11I mean, I've got five BAFTAs.
31:15Five.
31:16But nothing beats a gone fishing lifetime achievement.
31:21Just like to thank my family, but most of all, Ted, for being such a stalwart companion.
31:29Grab that, will ya?
31:31With cooking, it always starts at the beginning, building up those layers of flavour.
31:35Yeah.
31:36So in here, we've got some rosemary and thyme, all right?
31:38Right.
31:39We just take some of that rosemary and thyme.
31:41Yep.
31:42Then rub it between our hands.
31:43Because what...
31:44All herbs, they contain essential oils.
31:46So if you just have a smell of that now.
31:48Lovely.
31:49All right?
31:50Just get that into our garlic, our shallots.
31:51Beginning to smell like Christmas.
31:53How much does a kitchen like this cost?
31:56Half a million pounds.
31:57Ooh!
31:58Yeah.
31:59Oops!
32:00Sell some food then.
32:02Yeah.
32:03Yeah.
32:04Come on, Ted.
32:05Come on.
32:06I can hardly contain myself.
32:07I don't know about you.
32:08I'll come in my own time, son.
32:09Afternoon, sir.
32:10Can I come aboard?
32:11Yeah.
32:12Whoa, look at that fella.
32:13Look at that.
32:14It's a beauty.
32:15Yes, it is.
32:16So that's what a turbot looks like.
32:17Yeah, that's a turbot.
32:18We regard this as king of the sea.
32:19Right.
32:20It's just superior in flavour.
32:21With it being Christmas, I've got a lovely Cornish sparkling wine in with the onions.
32:26All right?
32:27Lay the turbot on top and bake in the oven.
32:29Right.
32:30Let's do this.
32:31Look at that lovely pad snow over there.
32:32That's where we're going.
32:33Apparently, that's where the big ceremony is.
32:34Yeah, you look at that.
32:35Well, you look at this stage.
32:36It's a great mix of the administrations.
32:37It's basically a great mix of the hudder.
32:38It is like a big-dict in the crowd.
32:39It's just over a year.
32:40I'm so excited.
32:41And at the end of the night, we call it firmness.
32:42Look at that.
32:43Yeah.
32:44Yeah.
32:45The amount of cake that's on the table, I'm so excited.
32:46I want to wait to get to know the left side of it.
32:47If I want to take you to pick this up, you can take this up.
32:49And that's the enough dough to do that.
32:50Right.
32:51And that's what I want to take a roll.
32:52That lovely tid, look, there's plaidstow over there, that's where we're going, that's where
32:59the big ceremony is.
33:00You know I'm up for the next James Bond, don't you?
33:12Don't do me a favour!
33:19Cut a dash, didn't I mate, eh?
33:24Ted, you're deaf as a pilot, didn't you?
33:30Pardon?
33:31Right, let's get these cabbages on, so we're just going to brush them with a little bit
33:34of butter, and then I want you to put them that side down on the barbecue, perfect.
33:40And we've just lightly steamed these cabbages, so that they're nice and cooked and we just
33:44get flavour from the barbecue.
33:47That's beautiful, yes, now we're cooking.
33:52Come Ted, come on, walk, there he is.
33:55This is the place, little old mum.
33:57I tell you what, you know, dogs aren't normally allowed in here, come on.
34:00I'm allowed anywhere I want mate, I'll go anywhere I like, South London, East London,
34:05South of France, Theresa, Venezuela.
34:10So, Lady Bird, good evening sir.
34:24Hello.
34:25What do you want?
34:26Well, could I look at the menu, see the wine list?
34:29Would you like to see the wine list?
34:31Yeah, I would, thank you.
34:32Actually, we don't serve wine to the over 80s.
34:37It can put them into shock.
34:41Are you a halfwit or something?
34:43Some people say, sir.
34:44Yeah, I'm not surprised.
34:46Will you be requiring the entertainment tonight, sir?
34:50Oh, well, yeah.
34:51I see you've got a hound with you, no hounds.
34:53Yeah, no, he's got a special dispensation, he's not any old hound.
34:56Who is he then?
34:57It's, er, it's Ted.
34:59Ted the dog?
35:00Yeah.
35:01He's actually a sort of guest of Bob Mortimus.
35:07Who did you say?
35:08You're so easy, aren't you?
35:10It's you, isn't it?
35:11It's you, isn't it?
35:12It's you!
35:13Yeah!
35:14Ah!
35:15You could see a wine list.
35:16Yeah, thank you, sir.
35:17There you go.
35:18Thank you very much.
35:19I've been preparing, gonna call it a Cornish Christmas dinner.
35:23Not what you might expect.
35:25Really?
35:26Have you been helping in the kitchen?
35:27I've been helping, yeah.
35:28Have you?
35:29Cos I heard the fire alarm go off.
35:30Yeah.
35:31What did you do?
35:32I was burning cabbage.
35:33Oh, really?
35:34Yeah.
35:35Well, that will do it then.
35:36What do I need?
35:39Looking forward to this.
35:40It's on its way.
35:41It looks amazing.
35:44Cheers.
35:46Oh, it didn't clink.
35:47That's fancy glasses.
35:48Isn't it?
35:49Wow.
35:52Oh, look at that.
35:54Oh, thank you so much.
35:55Roast turbot with all the trimmings.
35:57Roast turbot!
35:59And there you have it.
36:00Enjoy.
36:02And thank you for your help, Bob.
36:03Thank you, no worries.
36:04Thank you, Paul.
36:05Oh.
36:06I'm going in.
36:07Come on.
36:08Oh.
36:09Mmm.
36:10Tireback is amazing.
36:11You really do spoil me, Bob.
36:13Well, work stews come along once a year.
36:16We might as well make the most of it, Paul.
36:19How many categories are there this year?
36:21Two.
36:22Try to be quick, yeah?
36:23There will be laughter and prizes galore.
36:33Who's going to miss and who's going to score?
36:36It's the Gone Fishin' Annual Awards.
36:43Who loves you, baby?
36:47First up, Paul.
36:49Employee of the year.
36:50Yeah.
36:51This is the trophy you won last year.
36:53So it has to be returned, I'm afraid.
36:56Oh, no.
36:57I don't really want to give it back, Bob.
36:58It's become such a part of my life, but...
37:00Here we go.
37:01Nominations are...
37:03Let's see.
37:04Woo, woo, woo!
37:05Yeah!
37:06Let's fish.
37:07Ah!
37:08Ah!
37:09Yeah, you got me.
37:10First class, you got me, Bob.
37:11Well, why were you still there?
37:12Bob, Bob, Bob, Bob.
37:13Yes, I know.
37:14There you go.
37:15You're in, then, without no idea.
37:16That's angling, Paul.
37:17Do you like watching me fish, sort of?
37:19Yeah.
37:20You can learn, can't you?
37:21Ah!
37:22Yes, he's in!
37:23Yes!
37:24Do not wind, do not!
37:26Wind, Bob!
37:27I'm not winding, I'm just tidying up the reel!
37:30There's my dancing, that's specialist stuff, that.
37:33Wallop!
37:34Yes!
37:35Whoa, he's fresh.
37:36Look at the colours of that.
37:37Whoa!
37:38Ted's arriving in style, isn't he?
37:41Yeah, well, he's at it.
37:42No, it's going to be Ted, isn't it?
37:43Of course it's going to need to.
37:44I'll come on the other time, all right?
37:45You look so heroic.
37:48Oh, look at that guy.
37:49Oh, geez!
37:50Oh, there's a fault.
37:54Oh, there's another.
37:56What's that salmon, is it?
37:57It's not for you, Ted.
37:58Yeah, but it is.
38:00Unplease yourselves.
38:02Cool, haven't we had some laughs?
38:04Haven't we had some laughs?
38:06Oh, this is the moment.
38:09Yeah?
38:10Go on.
38:11And the winner is...
38:14Bob Mortimer.
38:17Oh!
38:18Yes, please!
38:20Wow!
38:21It's a revelation.
38:23Oh, come on, Paul.
38:24It's welding there.
38:25Oh, no, I'm so pleased for you, Bob.
38:27And there's a trophy as well.
38:28Oh, for God.
38:29It's actually a crown.
38:30Oh, that feels good.
38:32Hey, there we are.
38:33Did one of the jewels just fall off?
38:34Yeah, it did.
38:35Heavy is the head that wears a crown in your case, isn't it?
38:37Size of it.
38:38Your head, I mean.
38:39Well, there we are.
38:40There's one category down.
38:41Let's not prolong the agony.
38:42Let's crack on.
38:43I'll take this off out of respect for the award, okay?
38:44Okay, thank you.
38:45Because the next award is...
38:46That's...
38:47This is a biggie.
38:48Lifetime achievement.
38:49If you've given it to yourself, I'm walking out of this restaurant.
38:51I'm never looking back.
38:52Don't walk out, Paul.
38:53I'm going to, Bob.
38:54If you've given it to yourself...
38:55Oh, let's have a look.
38:56Oh, let's have a look at this.
38:57Let's have a look.
38:58Ted.
38:59Cute little Billy.
39:00Billy, I thought that nine years ago, sir.
39:02You come in fishing with us, Ted?
39:03Teddy.
39:04Mind the rod!
39:05Oh, this is worse than me, isn't he?
39:06Can you shift over a bit, Ted?
39:07What's he actually achieved?
39:08Well, he's had a lifetime, hasn't he?
39:09Oh, yeah.
39:10Oh, yeah.
39:11Oh, yeah.
39:12Oh, yeah.
39:13Oh, yeah.
39:14Oh, yeah.
39:15Oh, yeah.
39:16Oh, yeah.
39:17Oh, yeah.
39:18Oh, yeah.
39:19Oh, yeah.
39:20Oh, yeah.
39:21Oh, yeah.
39:22Oh, yeah.
39:23Oh, yeah.
39:24Oh, yeah.
39:25Oh, yeah.
39:26Oh, yeah.
39:27Oh, yeah.
39:28Oh, yeah.
39:29I was by him.
39:30Teddy, fetch.
39:31Oh, go on.
39:32Nah.
39:33Is Ted a dog?
39:35He's a species all of his own, isn't you, Ted?
39:37You all right, Ted?
39:39Yeah.
39:40It's like we've super glued him there, isn't it?
39:43Look, you can move, Ted.
39:44Yeah, it's Ted, isn't it?
39:45Well, yes, I think...
39:46You're not going to come sort of blindside and win, are you?
39:50Well, I don't think so.
39:51I haven't owned the envelope yet.
39:52Look at the state of him.
39:54And that's when he went insane.
39:57Remember, you have always got us two.
40:01That's right, Ted.
40:02Yeah.
40:03Well, let's just confirm it, Paul.
40:05The winner is Ted.
40:07Well deserved, Ted.
40:08Well done, Ted.
40:09Absolutely.
40:10If ever there was a winner there was, then Ted's the winner there was.
40:13There was.
40:14Yeah.
40:15Teddy, you got a crown.
40:16Wow.
40:17Let's present ourselves to the camera, Ted.
40:20On, on, on, on.
40:23Kings of the show.
40:25We are the champions.
40:27There is someone else on the show, isn't there, Ted?
40:29Yeah, I don't know.
40:30He's just sort of a shadow.
40:32As we all keep on fighting.
40:34Oh, don't go, Paul.
40:36You might win next year.
40:38He's off.
40:39We are the champions.
40:40We are the champions.
40:41We are the champions.
40:42We are the champions.
40:43No time for losers.
40:44We are the champions.
40:45Of the world.
40:46Come on, Ted.
40:47That's one of Paul's.
40:48Leave it alone.
40:49Come on.
40:50Come on.
40:51We are the champions.
40:55Of the world.
40:58Come on, Ted.
40:59That's one of Paul's.
41:00Leave it alone.
41:01Come on.
41:02Come on.
41:20Breakfast, Paul.
41:26I put a little bit of holly on yours, cheer you up, after last night.
41:31You're not bitter, are you, Paul? Forgotten all that.
41:33I'm an adult, Bob, so no, I'm not bitter.
41:35It just reflects badly on you, you know.
41:38We've got a long drive today. We're going west, west, west, west, west.
41:41Where are we going? Mousehole.
41:43But do you know what they call it, the Cornish people?
41:46It'll be muzzle or something like that, is it?
41:47Not far off, actually. Mousel.
41:48Mousel. Mousel, but for you and me, it will forever be...
41:53Mousel. Mousel.
41:55Ah, you pet. Right, come on.
42:06If I had a deep voice, I would sing a ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling.
42:12All day long I'd sing a ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-
42:42stretch, Bob.
42:51Can't, Teddy, go!
42:52Come on, let's go!
42:53First!
42:54Can't, Ted!
42:56Can't, Ted!
43:12There's your first little look at Mousel.
43:23Oh, look!
43:25Quintessentially Cornish.
43:29Oh, it wasn't designed for the car, was it, Bob?
43:32Getting on everyone's nerves,
43:35who are trying to enjoy this peaceful town.
43:37Oh, look at those boats as well, aren't they lovely?
43:40I love a painted boat, don't you, Bob?
43:41Yeah, sweet.
43:42See that, look, that light blue, that's a nice one.
43:44You know, in, uh...
43:45Oh, that's a nice one, look, the black and yellow.
43:50Don't like that one.
43:51Taking me out on the boat, aren't you?
43:53I am.
43:53Last chance to catch a fish.
43:57Come on, Teddy.
43:59Wow!
44:00What a morning, O'Veon!
44:01What a morning!
44:02Now, the guy we're going out with today on the boat, Neil,
44:05he's got a very special relationship with Mousel.
44:07He's a Mousel boy, but his dad
44:09was on the boat that went out in 1981,
44:14Penley disaster, where all the lifeboatmen were lost at sea.
44:18I mean, I have heard of that, yeah.
44:20And the boat they went to rescue as well went down.
44:22So, proper tragedy.
44:24He'll have a tell-to-tell then.
44:25He certainly will, mate.
44:26Neil!
44:34Hello, Neil.
44:35Morning, gentlemen.
44:36Thank you so much, Neil, for having us on board.
44:39Neil, happy to meet you.
44:39Paul, I can't remember his name.
44:43What's our chances today, Neil?
44:45It's fishing, guys, you know that.
44:47Yeah.
44:47It's not called catch, it's fishing,
44:48but we've got a good chance of catching a mack or two
44:50and maybe a pollock or two.
44:51We'll see what we can do.
44:53You've got an involvement with the Penley disaster, haven't you?
44:56Yeah, my father was lost on the Penley lifeboat,
44:58and I was turned away that night.
45:00I was a lifeboatman when I was only 17,
45:03but like everyone, every man,
45:04when I was 17, I knew everything.
45:06Yeah.
45:07You've got to remember, I've been playing rain in boats
45:08since I was four or five years old.
45:09That's all I've ever done.
45:10Yeah.
45:10And Trevely and the coxswain refused to take me.
45:13They refused to take two from one family,
45:14so I was turned away.
45:16Wow.
45:16And your dad was lost?
45:17My dad was lost, yeah.
45:18I mean, never forget them.
45:19I'm fiercely proud of what they did that night.
45:20I mean, the weather conditions was the worst in living memory.
45:24I've never seen weather like that.
45:25How old was your dad, Neil?
45:27My dad was 42.
45:28Ah, dear.
45:29Fine.
45:30And of course, all of them,
45:30they're all family, friends, all mates.
45:32Yeah, of course.
45:32It's such a small community,
45:34and tight, obviously, it has to be, doesn't it?
45:36It completely changed Mousel forever.
45:38Mousel never recovered from that.
45:39Oh.
45:41Do you do anything to sort of celebrate the memory of those people?
45:44On the 19th, we have the famous Christmas lights,
45:46and they're dimmed,
45:46and we have our own memories and all that.
45:48You have your own, like, little, you know.
45:49Yeah.
45:50Let's fish today in memory of your dad.
45:53Yeah, we'll do that.
45:54See if we can get something for him.
45:54Over there, Bob, look.
46:15You see that cross and that thing?
46:16Oh, yeah.
46:17That's a memorial light to the Penley victims.
46:20Oh, right.
46:33What we're doing, we're trying for a pollock,
46:35and we've got some silver shrimp on.
46:37I've hit the bottom, so I'll put that over now.
46:39Yeah, put that over there.
46:39Flip that over.
46:40Just wind up a little bit.
46:41And the idea is to wind up nice and slowly
46:44to keep that lure moving all the time.
46:46I keep winding all the way.
46:47Yeah.
46:52Couldn't have picked a better day for it.
46:54Oh, we're lucky, aren't we?
46:55We're lucky, lads.
46:58Ted's loving it.
46:59He, mate, loving this.
47:01He's having a good time, isn't he?
47:02I'm searching for the bottom, Paul.
47:26Oh, I'm hitting the bottom there.
47:27And I'm going to fish down there for a bit.
47:29Yeah.
47:32It will be funny, Christmas this year,
47:40without Grandad there.
47:41Yeah, yeah.
47:42It's strange.
47:44You know, you hear that some older people
47:46who kind of know they're on their last legs
47:48want to get a last Christmas in.
47:50Well, that's exactly, yeah, I'm pretty sure
47:52that's what happened with my parents.
47:53They both died on the same date.
47:57I mean, years apart.
47:58But January the 5th.
48:00Yeah.
48:00I mean, I don't know how sentient my mum was about
48:04or conscious of Christmas,
48:06but it's an extraordinary coincidence that...
48:11Because that's supposed to be, isn't it,
48:13that time of year is...
48:15Yeah.
48:15And I wonder if people have just managed to hold on.
48:18Hold on after Christmas.
48:20See the familiar faces one last time.
48:22Yeah.
48:24Well, we'll never know, really, Bob, will we?
48:28My dear old dad always said to me,
48:30and I've always tried to live my life like it,
48:31just be nice, that's all you've got to do.
48:33Yeah.
48:34Treat people as you want to be treated.
48:35You can't go far wrong, I don't think.
48:36Yeah.
48:37True, mate.
48:39Paul treats me pretty bad.
48:40Does he?
48:41Yeah.
48:41I've seen that, yeah.
48:42HE LAUGHS
48:44He's for his own good, though, Neil.
48:46HE LAUGHS
48:47Keep him on his toes.
48:49Yeah.
48:54Come on, you're not fishing very well.
48:56Sort yourself out.
48:57Come on, Bob.
48:59The people of Mousel depend on you.
49:01This could be our last chance, you know.
49:03I know.
49:05Neil wants to get to the bookies.
49:07HE LAUGHS
49:08Is there a bookies in Mousel?
49:11No.
49:13There we had three grocery shops, a shoe shop,
49:15two butchers when I grew up.
49:18There's none anymore.
49:19No shoes?
49:20They're all gone.
49:21Should we do a pit launch in a pail?
49:23Send shoes to Mousel?
49:24Yeah.
49:24HE LAUGHS
49:25HE LAUGHS
49:26HE LAUGHS
49:27HE LAUGHS
49:28HE LAUGHS
49:30HE LAUGHS
49:32HE LAUGHS
49:34HE LAUGHS
49:35HE LAUGHS
49:36HE LAUGHS
49:36Oh!
49:37Oh?
49:38He's in.
49:39That might be the bottom, actually.
49:40HE LAUGHS
49:42Come on.
49:44I don't know what it is.
49:45Shall I wind in or keep going?
49:47A couple of mackerel here, look.
49:49Have you got mackerel?
49:49Yeah.
49:50Well done, Paul.
49:51Hold up, let's get that hand twisted.
49:53Look!
49:53HE LAUGHS
49:54MACKEROL!
49:55Two mackerel!
49:56Look at that!
49:57HE LAUGHS
49:57Fresh as pain.
49:58Look at them.
49:59Oh, you mind your fingers.
50:00Wow.
50:01It's a very pretty fish, you know, Paul.
50:03It really is.
50:04Yeah, you grab that.
50:05Wow, look at it.
50:07Electric fish, isn't it?
50:09What a creature.
50:11Amazing.
50:11That's what we're coming for, and that is our first...
50:15First ever mackerel.
50:17Wow.
50:17Look at the sheen on it.
50:19It took us seven or eight years.
50:21HE LAUGHS
50:21HE LAUGHS
50:22It's been brilliant now.
50:25It's been lovely.
50:26What a glorious day.
50:27But we've got our Christmas night to compile.
50:30Ooh-ho-ho!
50:30What have you got lined up for me, Bob?
50:32You'll have to wait and see.
50:34Oh, well, well, well.
50:35Excited.
50:36Maybe this Christmas will mean something more
50:41Maybe this year
50:44Love will appear
50:46Deeper than ever before
50:50And maybe forget...
50:53Wind yourself down here, Paul.
50:57Halt.
50:58Because we are staying here.
51:01Lovely.
51:02Do you know what it is?
51:03No.
51:03Quaint.
51:04Quaint's a good description.
51:05Yeah, it is, isn't it?
51:06Quaint works.
51:07Come on in.
51:09Maybe this Christmas...
51:10Woo!
51:11Whoa!
51:14Christmas is here, Bob.
51:17Oh, how lovely.
51:18That is just what I ordered.
51:20Christmas vibe.
51:21Hello, Christmas.
51:23Lovely.
51:25Ooh.
51:25You manage those stairs, old-timer?
51:27Yeah, not too bad.
51:29Oh, this is lovely.
51:31Look at this.
51:31Oh, a little living room.
51:33Nice.
51:34Twin beds.
51:34Have you brought your twins?
51:36Here, this is a nice one.
51:38Harbour View.
51:40Bob, look at this.
51:42Oh, hey, up.
51:43Oh, yeah.
51:45Wow.
51:46I look after you.
51:47I really look after you.
51:48Don't you, don't you, mate?
51:49Happy Christmas.
51:51Where's my briefcase?
51:53I'll give you a clue, Ted.
51:54It's right here.
51:55Ha, ha, ha.
51:56Here we go.
51:58Oh, dear.
51:59Oh, dear.
52:02It's Laurel and Hardy, isn't it?
52:04Ha, ha, ha.
52:16Watch your ears, Ted.
52:25Nice.
52:25A few more of these.
52:26Come on, old-timer.
52:30Ooh.
52:32Look at this.
52:34Cool.
52:34Who have you had in?
52:35Lawrence Llewellyn Bowen?
52:36No.
52:37It's amazing, look at it.
52:38Cheers for a lovely Christmas trip.
52:40Yeah.
52:41Is this cornish champagne?
52:43Hmm.
52:44I've got your present, Paul.
52:46Have you?
52:46Yeah.
52:47Is that okay?
52:48I think it is, because I've got one for you.
52:50Would you like it?
52:53Yes, please.
52:54Do you think you deserve it?
52:54Yes, I do.
52:55Even after all your gloating with your crowns and your self-aggrandisation, you still think
53:00you deserve a present?
53:01Hey, if you don't want to give it to us, don't.
53:03Of course I do, Bob.
53:03Because I am give, give, give.
53:07Ooh.
53:08Ooh.
53:10Go on, then.
53:12Yep.
53:14There it is.
53:15Oh, it's a clonker.
53:16It is, isn't it?
53:17It suits me.
53:18It's gentlemanly.
53:19And if you get annoyed with me, you can just go...
53:22Like that.
53:24And if I've made a mistake in the bath, we can just quickly move it.
53:27You can just scoop it up.
53:29Thank you very much.
53:30I can tell this is actually rather beautiful.
53:32It is a cracker, isn't it?
53:33Walnut?
53:34Yeah.
53:35No, do you want one?
53:37It's just there on the plate.
53:39Thank you very much.
53:40Oh, no, it's a beauty, isn't it?
53:41That makes me so happy.
53:43I mean, it is lovely.
53:44Hmm.
53:45Mine's a bad present.
53:46Happy Christmas to you.
53:47Competitive, Bob.
53:47Thank you, Bob.
53:49I wonder what this is.
53:50You like it.
53:50I hope you like it.
53:51Is it a picture of Bob in a crown?
53:53It's a gunfishing calendar.
53:56It's nice.
54:00Do you see?
54:00I thought I'd make you look nice.
54:02I see.
54:03Well, I look pretty good like that.
54:04I look like Lawrence Llewellyn Bowie, don't I?
54:06Yeah, yeah.
54:06Just relaxing in front of some books.
54:10There's a nice one of you, isn't it?
54:13Isn't that nice, you and Ted?
54:14Oh, you look quite sharp there, don't you?
54:21A little tiny head.
54:25Oh, look at that.
54:27Boom!
54:30That was a bit rude boy mode, wasn't it?
54:32Yeah, I did like that one.
54:35I tell you what, Bob, it's not far off, is it?
54:37Well, thank you.
54:40What a treat.
54:42I should probably go and get our little meal.
54:45Go on then.
54:45We're going to have turkey and some cake.
54:48Oh.
54:49It's a beauty, isn't it?
54:50My favourite meal of the Christmas period.
54:57Go on, slice me off some breast.
55:00Beautiful.
55:00It's nicely cooked.
55:01Oh, it is, isn't it?
55:02Look at that.
55:03Lovely, yeah.
55:06Ah, you cheeky fella.
55:09It's actually a turkey cake.
55:10It's a turkey cake?
55:12It's a turkey cake.
55:13Oh, lovely.
55:14Isn't that sensational?
55:15I'm going in.
55:16Well done, Bob, a lovely bit of trickery there.
55:18Christmas trickery.
55:19Lovely, mate.
55:20Because you know Christmas is a time when you can be a little bit naughty.
55:24Turn it to my wake.
55:26Do you want a carrot?
55:27Go on.
55:28Oh, hold on a minute.
55:31Hold on.
55:31Wait a minute.
55:32Hold on.
55:33Wait a minute, you two tricksters.
55:36What are you doing to me?
55:37Well, bloody hell, that's the nicest carrot I've ever had.
55:39LAUGHTER
55:40Pretty by the end of our Cornish Christmas trip, Bob.
55:52It is.
55:53How are you feeling about going home?
55:54Because it's going to be your first Christmas without your granddad?
55:58It will be different, and we'll all miss him.
56:00Yeah.
56:01And it will never be the same again.
56:03No.
56:03But we'll pull a cracker.
56:05Yeah.
56:05On his anniversary.
56:06Yeah, yeah.
56:07He liked a cracker.
56:08Well, it's actually good to have very fond, positive memories of people, you know.
56:13And I do with my parents.
56:15Those, my parents, your granddad, they had a long life, so.
56:19Did have a long life.
56:20Yeah.
56:20And here's a nice thing, is around our Christmas table when the boys were young and granddad was
56:26sat there, the little boys and granddad would always wear their paper hat.
56:31Right.
56:31We were all too vain and full of ourselves.
56:35Yeah.
56:35But old granddad and the kids.
56:38That's what granddad's for, really.
56:40Granddad's are for wearing paper hats.
56:41Sit there, be quiet, put the hat on, granddad.
56:43And carry them home, home, home from the sea, angel of mercy, answer our plea.
56:53Can you hear that?
56:55I can, yeah.
56:57So sing it.
56:58Yeah, Dan.
57:00Come with me to the window.
57:03For a final Christmas spectacular.
57:05Come on, mate.
57:06Joy, joy, joy, joy, joy, joy, the mouse hole, male voice choir.
57:26Oh, I love a male voice choir.
57:27I know you do.
57:28I know you do.
57:29Happy Christmas, Paul.
57:45Merry Christmas, Paul, mate.
57:46Merry Christmas.
57:46Thanks, mate.
57:47What an amazing treat.
57:48Joy, joy, joy, joy, joy.
58:00Thank you and Merry Christmas to you all.
58:04Thank you very much.
58:05And away.
58:06Cheers and gone.
58:08Cheers and gone.
58:10There's no more little secrets
58:13We haven't yet disclosed
58:16We bother living daylights
58:19A better one to close
58:22And all our cards for Christmas
58:25Are written to us both
58:28Come on
58:31Who's got the most
58:34Said we'd be close
58:37Said we'd work perfectly
58:40Celebrities in a spin for Michael McIntyre's Christmas Wheel
58:45Or Christmas Day at a quarter to seven
58:47A chill in the air next on BBC Two Wales
58:50New from Margetis
58:52Who else?
58:53A ghost story for Christmas
58:55To the child that she'll smother
58:58It's too close for a lover
59:01It's too close for a lover
59:04We are each other
59:07Like it destinées to its own
59:09Your newAB
59:17Seven
59:20So
59:21Yell
59:23We're each other
59:24With you
59:24Now
59:25We're each other
59:26We're each other
59:27Who else
59:29Who else
59:30Some
59:32To the child
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