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00:00Music
00:25It was Christmas Eve
00:35Oh, Christmas Eve
00:37In the drunk tank
00:41And all that uncertainty
00:45Won't see another one
00:49And then we sang a song
00:53Thank you
00:55The rare old mountains young
00:57I turn my face away
01:01Undreamed about you
01:05Got on a lucky one
01:11Come in like 10 to one
01:15I've got a feeling
01:19Cause the earth is for me
01:21So happy Christmas
01:26I love you baby
01:30I can see a better time
01:35When all our dreams come true
01:49They've got cars big as bars
01:54They've got rivers of gold
01:56But the wind goes right through you
01:57It's no place for the old
01:59When you first took my hand on a cold Christmas Eve
02:02You promised me Broadway was waiting for me
02:05You were pretty queen
02:07I knew your city
02:08When the band finished play
02:09You know she's better than Adam and Alya, don't you?
02:13Oh, dumb
02:14I mean, she could have invited one of your exes
02:16Balance it out a bit
02:17Who's she?
02:19The cat's mother
02:20Do you like what I got, Eva?
02:22It reminds me of that quote from the Bible
02:25Pearls before swine
02:27Ma
02:27What?
02:29Why is everyone so serious?
02:32Come on, it's Christmas
02:33Our first guest has arrived
02:35Merry Christmas
02:36Hiya
02:36My secret Santa contribution
02:39I hope I'm not too early
02:40Oh, of course not
02:41Nan's been on the eggnog since breakfast
02:43The mouth on that
02:45Let me get you one, Megan
02:47Wait till you taste it
02:48You'll die
02:49Mwah
02:51Don't let her get to you
02:53Rise above it
02:55Oh, I'm rising
02:56Practically transcendental
02:58Closed?
03:06Closed on Christmas Day?
03:09I mean, it's like the ravens have left the tower
03:12They will be opening later, I believe
03:15Family meal?
03:16I mean, lucky for some, eh?
03:19In case of I'm all right, Jack
03:20If ever I've heard one
03:21Happy birthday, David
03:25Yeah, ta
03:26Oh, yes
03:27Happy, eh
03:28Merry Christmas
03:32You're a little late for last-minute shopping, aren't you?
03:35Oh, no, I wish
03:36No
03:36Wouldn't late for work
03:37See?
03:38Yes, fascinating
03:40Not surprised he
03:43He doesn't want to be at home at the moment
03:45Why?
03:46Oh!
03:48What's been happening at Lesbian Ranch?
03:50My donation for our secret Santa
03:59Oh, yeah, the table looks dead nice, Eva
04:03I hope you'll be handing out sunglasses
04:05Now, Ollie
04:07As wonderful as it is to see you bonding with little Frankie here
04:10Don't you think you should go check on the food?
04:13Of course
04:13Everything's under control, Nan
04:16He's making my favourite
04:20A bird within a bird within a bird
04:23You seen something you don't like, Maggie?
04:29Plenty
04:30Ta-da
04:35Oh, I hate leaving you on your own
04:40I'm going to sit and mope and watch everything I've circled in the TV guide
04:44Well, at least you know I'll come back sober
04:47Yep, Kev's enough to make anyone leave that
04:50Right, come on then, me and you
04:53Let's get off
04:53To see Jack and open some presents
04:56See you later
04:57Oh, some presents?
04:59Your presents!
05:04It just feels weird being here
05:10Especially when I'm leaving Leanne to fend for herself at speed, dog
05:13Well, they invited us
05:14And Ollie's meant to be a great cook, so
05:16Come on, open it
05:17It's symbolic
05:21Of what?
05:23The key to your heart?
05:25Listen
05:25I love you
05:26And I think we should move in together
05:28In fact
05:31We can pick up the keys for Kitzel Flat Red Bank whenever you want
05:34Are you serious?
05:35Yeah, I'm serious
05:36Ali and Azir, will you make me the happiest man on earth?
05:40I'm with anything
05:41I'd love to
05:43Kurt, what do you think you were doing?
05:47Come on, babe, it's Christmas
05:48One or two won't hurt
05:49As long as it's only one or two
05:52It's bird within a bird within a bird
05:55Sounds very Henry VIII
05:58Divorced, beheaded, died
06:01Divorced, beheaded
06:03Survived
06:03Survived
06:03I always find that last one very disappointing
06:07Hey
06:09Merry Christmas
06:10Merry Christmas, Daniel
06:11Hello, young man
06:12Just wanted to give Megan a Christmas present
06:13Oh, and is this your little guy?
06:17Couldn't you just eat him?
06:19Come here to me
06:20Oh, you're gorgeous
06:23You must stay for dinner
06:25We'll set two more places
06:27We have more company
06:28Well, I'm sure Daniel's got all the places to be
06:31Hey, us barlows would do anything to avoid Tracy's crusty old nut roast
06:35Perfect
06:36We'll take the little lad upstairs to where the other kids are playing
06:40And would someone give Daniel here a drink from the bar?
06:44Thought we weren't doing gifts
06:45Well, aren't you going to open it?
06:47A weekend away at the Dovedale Spa for two
06:59Oh, wow
07:00That's supposed to be amazing
07:01Thank you
07:03Will?
07:05Sorry about him
07:17He's missing his girlfriend
07:19Chloe and Hull
07:21Bless him
07:23So, Audrey's gone to Gales for Christmas, has she?
07:30Did she fly?
07:31Yeah, bless her
07:32Oh, I so miss air travel
07:34You know, the glamour of the trolley dollies
07:36In-flight entertainments
07:38And on one particularly memorable jaunt across the Grand Canyon
07:41The giddy thrills of the Mile High Club
07:44I hope you two don't want feeding
07:47David!
07:48Worry not
07:49We're not peripatetic noshers
07:51We just dropped by to wish you felicitations of the season
07:55And a happy birthday, of course
07:56Sorry, David's a bit stressed
07:59His birthday present from his mum's gone missing
08:01Well, I'm not bothered
08:03Do I look bothered?
08:03Yes, David, actually
08:05You look incredibly bothered
08:06Oh, the curse of the light-fingered postman strikes again
08:09Abidemi is not light-fingered
08:11Abidemi's quite fit, actually
08:13Oh, brat
08:14You know, Mother swore blind that she sent me Ben Shepard novelty coasters last Micklemas
08:20Did they arrive?
08:21Did they poncho?
08:23Gale sent a picture that the delivery driver took
08:26Whose doorstep does that look like to you?
08:28I mean, I had to make my own out of cork flooring, pastry cutter and a couple of taker breaks
08:33Well, it's classic Gale, innit?
08:34Well, it's classic Gale, innit?
08:35She's got a postcode to house that she lived at for four million years
08:38Could that be Tim and Sally's?
08:41I don't want a stupid present anyway
08:44Now that is one hell of a moist breast
08:52Plumptious, that's what it is
08:55Oh, potatoes think it's Christmas
08:57Oh, hang on a minute
08:58It is
08:58It is Christmas
08:59And compliments to the chef
09:01Thank you, Todd
09:02Cheers
09:03Cheers
09:04I'm the sous chef
09:06Did you get my email?
09:10Oh, I'm so sorry, that's so rude of me
09:12Yes, thank you very much
09:15What email?
09:17Oh, someone's got in the most amazing gift she was telling us before
09:20Lovely
09:21Oh, I
09:21I'm jealous
09:22I am, I am spitting feathers
09:24Right, so you know he really fancies Andrew Scott
09:27So I have got him tickets to an Andrew Scott retrospective at a film festival
09:32Including a Q&A with the man himself
09:34Was Andrew Scott in Etty Wainthrop?
09:37Oh, lucky Etty
09:39I don't think so
09:41Didn't know you were such a fan of his canon of work
09:45I don't think it was that canon he was interested in
09:48Oh, what did the kids get you for you?
09:51Was it socks and smellies?
09:52Oh, kids, honestly
09:54They can be so unimaginative, can't they?
09:57Do you know what Daisy got me one Christmas?
09:59What?
09:59A pencil sharpener
10:01Oh, no, they've not got me now yet, but I'm sure that'll be rectified soon
10:07I, erm, I got tried to form
10:10Didn't I, love?
10:11Yeah
10:12It's gorgeous
10:13Oh, isn't it amazing we can get in the 50-piece shop these days?
10:17Andrew Scott, by the way
10:19I don't think who he is
10:20He thinks you fancy Terry Scott
10:22He's that hot priest in that thing where she went round being posh talking to me
10:26Oh, yes, no, I know, I know, yeah, yeah
10:29Speaking of vicars
10:29Billy's taking his time, isn't he?
10:33It's his busiest day of the year, isn't it?
10:35Ah, all these hot priests everywhere, eh?
10:39What a lucky boy you are, sorry
10:40This is lovely
10:43You all right, Lisa Lou?
10:53Erm, I got a text from Roy
10:55He says you rang the hotel that Carla booked on you
10:57She never checked in
10:58Oh, no biggie
10:59Maybe she changed her mind and went somewhere else
11:02Well, obviously she went somewhere else
11:04The question is where
11:06And she's disabled the tracker on her phone, so
11:08Right
11:09Well, I'm nipping out for an hour
11:13What, now?
11:15Well, I can't divulge too much
11:16But even on Christmas Day
11:17There's stuff I need to sort for Spain
11:19Crikey, you're in and out more times than I've been, Carla
11:22Sorry
11:24Mm-hm
11:25Sorry
11:28Hey
11:40I just wanted to check you were cool
11:42With me and Ali have been here
11:43Maggie kind of press-ganged us
11:45Yeah, she's good at that
11:46It's fine, darling
11:47You OK?
11:49My letter
11:50Which letter?
11:52The letter
11:52I think someone's taken it out of my bag
11:56Look, let me have a look in your bag
12:13Maybe a fresh pair of ice
12:14I've done nothing but check it
12:16Fill your boots
12:16I don't believe that it's just fallen out somewhere
12:21Well, if it has
12:22Someone's obviously chucked it
12:23Which is a good thing
12:24No news is good news
12:25I feel sick
12:26It's not there, is it?
12:28No
12:28Oh, do you know what?
12:29Maggie's been so off with me
12:31But then she's like that every day, ain't she?
12:32I'm sure if she'd found it, you'd know by now
12:34Yeah, that's true
12:35Look, calm down
12:36Deep breaths
12:37All right, babe
12:39Everything all right in here?
12:41Yeah, fine
12:42I better, um
12:43Listen, babe
12:49I've got no problem with your ex being here but holding hands
12:51I know, I'm sorry
12:52What happens the next time we walk in?
12:54He's unhooking your bra
12:54He was just giving me a pep talk
12:56With his fingers
12:57Babe, I was just getting wound up about Maggie
12:59He was just calming me down
13:01So come to me, not Bonnie Prince Charlie
13:02I know, I'm sorry
13:03Look, for what it's worth, I'm sorry about my ma
13:06Which bit?
13:08All of her
13:09Come on, babe, strength of the numbers
13:12I'm sorry to hear about your mum
13:24It's what it is
13:39Happens to us all eventually, I guess
13:42You must miss her
13:48I'm being daft really, but
13:50Yeah
13:51Nothing daft about it
13:53People are still around, you want to make the most of him
13:56It's what we need, isn't it?
14:01What?
14:04Human contact
14:05You haven't stolen Gail's presents
14:10Yeah, but that looks like your doorstep
14:13Doesn't it?
14:15That's nothing like our doorstep, you plum
14:17Well, Mary said it was
14:19Well, has Mary got a degree in step recognising?
14:23Well, it might have been Brian
14:24Have you been shaming us on some sort of chat group?
14:28No, they came round for Christmas drinks
14:30Ooh, since when were you, Pally, with Brian and Mary?
14:34I'm not
14:34You've never invited us round for Christmas drinks
14:36Look, I'm sure I would have noticed if one of our presents said
14:39Happy birthday, David, love, Mum
14:41Yeah
14:43Yeah, I suppose
14:44Well, you don't mind, I'm not bothered, anyway
14:46Didn't want to tell your face that
14:47Do you know what, Tim? Forget it
14:49Mmm
14:53Nice ta
14:55Very festive
14:57I made that
14:59Yeah
15:01Bit dry
15:03Well, now you've had your meds and some scram
15:07You're going to leave a nice, reassuring voice note for my lady wife
15:10No, I'm not
15:11I'm not doing it
15:14You know, when she realises I'm missing
15:17She'll come looking for me
15:19Oh, right
15:20Do you really think so?
15:24You see, that's not the impression I got last night when she was...
15:27Oh, no, I don't want to rub it in
15:30You can probably smell her perfume on me
15:34If I found the evidence that you're corrupt
15:39It's only a matter of time before this do-to
15:42Oi, Miss World, shut your face
15:45Just need to reply to my lease
15:53Oh, she wants me
16:06Maybe I'm just better than you
16:10Oh, did I mention that we slept together last night?
16:14Again
16:14My bad
16:16Naughty Becky
16:17That's what she said, actually
16:22He's acting like you used to a serious
16:32Oh, come on, it's not like I got him a present
16:35Or me
16:36Oh, really?
16:43Well, I feel a bit daft now
16:44We're up in it, then
16:47I'm new here, Buds
16:52Thanks
16:53There you are
16:58I feel I should be banging a gong
17:00Come in now, will you?
17:01Dinner is served
17:03Got a skirt on
17:09Is it good?
17:10Oh, sound of music!
17:12Yes, yes, yes
17:13My girl, my girl
17:15Oh, I love that film
17:19I played Maria on the ships
17:20Oh, here we go
17:21We did the whole thing in 40 minutes
17:23It was basically edited highlights
17:25It was me spinning around on the Alp
17:28And then it cut straight to that Rolf
17:29Pulling a gun on those poor kiddies
17:31It's good, haven't you?
17:31Oh, I thought of like kiddies
17:33The wrong side of third
17:34I don't know, still
17:36The audience went nuts for it
17:37I've got loads of these fascinating anecdotes
17:39I've learned it
17:40No, if you're ever suffering from insomnia
17:41Phone her up and ask her about a 12-minute chitty-chitty bang
17:43Right, here we go
17:44Okay, it's the song
17:46It's hard to tell with your acting
17:47Oh, shut up
17:48Five words
17:50Oh, yes, please, love
17:51First word, first word
17:53You okay?
17:56They're not answering
17:57Who?
17:59I'm trying to have video call the kids
18:00What are you doing?
18:03Oh, it's a little more tips than anything, sir
18:09I'll, um, get a point
18:11Oh, no way
18:15Exactly
18:15This is so much better than Tracy's nuts
18:18What is it exactly?
18:22It's a bird within a bird within a bird
18:25Ollie?
18:25It's a chicken inside a duck inside a turkey
18:28Do you like it?
18:30Yeah, it's fantastic, isn't it?
18:31Mmm, so are the roasties
18:32And this nut roast is definitely not crusty
18:35My grandson is a very special cook
18:38In fact, all my boys are special
18:41And they deserve to be surrounded by special things, Lauren
18:46How will the kids, well?
18:50Yeah, fine
18:51You're not tempted to stay with them?
18:55My boys deserve only the best
18:57In life, in work
18:59And especially in love
19:02Is it time for Secret Sunday yet?
19:10Food first
19:11Fun later
19:13So, um, do you like being a chef?
19:19I do, yeah
19:19Yeah, well, I'm in rubbish company
19:21I bet you're not
19:22Nah, I am
19:23I could burn a salad
19:24We'll have to pouch you for speed, darling
19:26You'll need a big pan
19:27That wee lad's going nowhere
19:30Wee lad?
19:31I bet you like that, mate
19:31I think I'll always be his wee lad
19:33A toast
19:34To my boys
19:36Merry Christmas
19:38Merry Christmas
19:39Hey
19:44The Poland Express is on later
19:47I thought we could all
19:48Hunker down and watch it together
19:50Don't confuse the boundaries, Kev
19:53We did this for the lads
19:54Confuse the boundaries?
19:57I'm not throwing me lips on you
19:58He's won, I've lost
19:59I'm over it
20:00Kev
20:00Look, he might be younger than me
20:02He might be better looking than me
20:03Don't, you know
20:04I can't call with this
20:05I've got a text card
20:06Tell him we're coming home
20:07Alfie!
20:08We need to go now, kiddo
20:11Can you hurry up?
20:12We need to go now, kiddo
20:13Can you hurry up?
20:38Mobile, answer call on speakerphone.
20:43Colin?
20:45Colin, are you there?
20:48They have a weird concept, isn't it?
20:52Secrets on tap.
20:53Well, it's a bit weird buying vouchers for spa weekends
20:56for people you hardly even know.
20:58It's a family tradition.
21:00Do you know what? I actually do need socks.
21:02I said that this morning, didn't I?
21:03She did.
21:04Your pillow talk is outrageous.
21:08And the next one is for...
21:12Drumroll, please.
21:13Oh.
21:17Ben.
21:18Wee-hee.
21:22Is it a jigsaw?
21:24Oh, come on, what is it?
21:25Wouldn't you like to know?
21:30To my baby.
21:32Give it to me.
21:32Let him read it.
21:33Ben, give it to me, please, give it to me.
21:35I said, let him read it.
21:37You bitch.
21:39Let my son read the lovely gift I got him.
21:43What is it?
21:44Oh, just evidence of an affair.
21:46What?
21:47Between Eva and Adam.
21:49Why are you so intent on killing our relationship?
22:13Maybe I don't want my son to be with a two-timing tart.
22:18Read it out to the group.
22:19Ma.
22:20It's a letter to the baby she aborted
22:22when she and Ben were going through a rough patch.
22:26Rough patch?
22:27He probably gave her a few dirty looks.
22:30He went back to his wife?
22:31And you went running back to the groin of his lordship here.
22:35Oh, sorry.
22:37Adam, my rock.
22:38Is this true?
22:40Your words, not mine.
22:41There was no affair.
22:42I don't think that Adam's...
22:43Babe, I can explain.
22:44Well, go ahead then.
22:45And Adam continued to be her rock
22:47when she aborted their child.
22:50Oh, you're not a very nice person, are you?
22:52Do you know the worst of it?
22:53It's still going on.
22:54Oh, please.
22:55No, I'm not having it.
22:56It's not because it wasn't in the first place, babe.
22:58I promise.
22:59Well, it's got enough all to do with you.
23:01Is this why you two were holding hands earlier?
23:02What?
23:02No.
23:04Are you happy now?
23:05Not by a long shot.
23:07Because you have broken my son's heart.
23:09Whether or not Eva had an abortion is, frankly, none of your business.
23:12Is it not, frankly?
23:14Well, isn't it a woman's right to choose?
23:16What she chose was infidelity.
23:18What kind of a mother are you?
23:20Daniel.
23:20To do this to your own family and on Christmas Day?
23:23You can take that smirk off your face and all.
23:25Mate, I'm not smirking.
23:26Nothing happened.
23:27Who do you think you're giving your dirty looks to?
23:29You're completely misreading the situation.
23:30Aye.
23:31Well, misread this.
23:32Ben!
23:32Yeah, don't worry, Betsy.
23:41I'm fine.
23:42I'm having a really lovely holiday.
23:46Only Roy rang the hotel and you're not staying there.
23:50No, I had to move in the end.
23:54I'm staying at a new place now.
23:56It's called Rhubarb Hill Hotel.
24:01Rhubarb Hill Hotel?
24:02Yeah, yeah.
24:03I'm in the busing suite.
24:06Well, I hope you're having a good time.
24:08I'm missing you.
24:22James, get dressed and get up.
24:24Abby's on her way back.
24:25What?
24:26Just hurry up.
24:27Be quiet.
24:27I'm calling her.
24:31Hiya, love.
24:32Where are you?
24:33I'm just outside the main door.
24:35Wicked.
24:36Listen, would you do me a favour?
24:37Would you just go to the car and get me charger out of the glove box, please?
24:41I haven't got the keys.
24:43Oh, but I thought you always had them.
24:45Oh, God, you lazy.
24:47Oh, no, hang on.
24:48I tell her I've got them here.
24:49Yeah, do you mind?
24:50Yeah, of course.
24:51I'm running out of juice.
24:52Yeah, of course I can.
24:53Just give us a sec.
24:55Right, well, come on.
24:57We need to go and get Cal's charger.
24:59Let's charge you.
24:59Let's make it.
25:01One more move like that and I'm phoning the police.
25:14Why do you hate me so much?
25:17Sit down.
25:18This could take some time.
25:19Oi.
25:20Have you got anything to say for yourself?
25:22Oh, I've got plenty.
25:23And don't you oi me.
25:25Lies.
25:25All lies.
25:26I never had an affair with Adam.
25:28The letter says different.
25:29He supported me while...
25:31How can you trust a silly word she says?
25:32Well, I was supporting our baby.
25:34What?
25:34The baby was ours.
25:48What was with that stupid hotel name?
25:51Well, I don't know.
25:52Do I?
25:53I didn't think on my feet.
25:54You had a knife pointing at me.
25:57I don't know why I said rhubarb or whatever.
25:59You're giving me a headache.
26:01Do you talk like this with Lies?
26:03No wonder she's gone off you.
26:05Biggest regret of my life, she said.
26:07Meeting Carla.
26:09The biggest regret of my life is following you here.
26:12You did not.
26:14Because I'd have known.
26:17Don't lie.
26:20Okay.
26:22All right.
26:23Costello told me the address.
26:26The rest you do know.
26:27What rest do I know?
26:29That I broke in here.
26:30That you caught me red-handed.
26:34You know, but if I were you,
26:36I wouldn't have left an incriminating burner phone
26:39just lying around linking me to a hit on Costello.
26:43You're so boring.
26:46Right.
26:48Well, I can't stand around here chewing the cud all day.
26:50People to see.
26:52Wives to bed.
26:54So she's not your wife, is she?
26:57Because you're officially dead.
26:59So that makes her your widow.
27:01Funny you mention dead.
27:04Because Lisa
27:05said that sleeping with you
27:08was like going to bed
27:11with a corpse.
27:13Happy Christmas, Ducky.
27:20Oh.
27:21Oh.
27:22Oh.
27:23Oh.
27:24Oh, now that is what I call a beautiful set of conflicts.
27:39Aren't they?
27:39Aren't you lucky?
27:41You.
27:41Yeah.
27:43It was a good service, Billy.
27:44It was.
27:45It was lovely.
27:46Was it all Christmas?
27:47It was.
27:48It was.
27:48We had carols around the crib
27:50and mince pies afterwards.
27:52Oh, mince pies.
27:53You should have gone, George.
27:54Oh.
27:55Was there, um,
27:57mulled wine?
27:58It's a family service, love.
27:59Not happy hour at the legs of man.
28:02You all right over there, Theo?
28:04You're looking a bit...
28:06Oh.
28:06Oh.
28:07Are we out staying our welcome?
28:08Oh, no, no, no, no.
28:09Oh, wait.
28:10Tell us.
28:10Well, no, you can tell me.
28:12I mean, I'm very hard to offend.
28:15Unless it's racism,
28:16I do take offence at that.
28:18No, no.
28:18Honestly, of course not.
28:19You're fine.
28:20You're a worse actor than she is.
28:24I think that's bullying, that.
28:26I'm going to touch my union.
28:28National Union of Brace and Barmates.
28:32Speaking of which,
28:33shall we, um,
28:34shall we adjourn to the Rovers?
28:36Oh, no, no, no.
28:36Don't leave on my account.
28:38Although I think old Torrington's ready for a lie down, isn't you?
28:41Yeah, you are looking a bit quiet over there, mate.
28:43I think he's had one of the eight.
28:45I'm fine.
28:46That's what they all say.
28:47I'll tell you what, Billy, he'll miss you.
28:49I found out today he's got a thing for old priests.
28:51I have to get myself a dog collar.
28:53Joe, what's under your catter?
28:56All right, well, um...
28:57Yeah, well, yeah, well...
28:59Nice to see you both.
29:00I'll be here briefly.
29:01Come here.
29:02Yeah, sorry about that.
29:04Oh!
29:06You get your bag and I'll get your coat.
29:07Oh, come here.
29:09Oh, Merry Christmas.
29:10And thanks ever so much.
29:14Bye, love.
29:14Bye, Summer.
29:16Yeah, get that down.
29:17All right.
29:19Bye.
29:19You know full well when we were going through a rough patch.
29:22And you know full well why we were.
29:24Don't put that on me.
29:25So this abortion's on me, is it?
29:26The only thing that I regret about that termination is not telling you.
29:31But, babe, how could I?
29:32How could I bring the baby into that?
29:34You weren't even taking my calls.
29:35You were living back with the dragon.
29:37Don't call her that.
29:38And whenever we did talk to each other, we were just taking shots.
29:41And yet you still got pregnant by me.
29:44Allegedly.
29:46Don't you dare.
29:48Sorry.
29:49I was in no fit state to bring a baby and Susie up on my own.
29:54Now, if I'd have thought for one second that we were going to get back together, I would have told you.
30:00So where does Adam fit into all of this?
30:01He doesn't.
30:02Not really, except the fact that he was a supportive friend.
30:05He was meeting a client in Hull.
30:07I bumped into him at the Paragon Interchange.
30:09He was getting the train.
30:10I was getting the bus.
30:11Kismet.
30:14Just to let you know, your pub is open.
30:18Oh.
30:18Oh, it's my pub when it suits you.
30:21Well, I'm sure it wouldn't hurt you to put a shift in, Maggie.
30:23Get your hands as dirty as your tongue.
30:25Are you going to let her speak to me like that?
30:31Very exciting to be summoned here like this.
30:34It's very nice.
30:35Quite palatial.
30:38Mind you, you must be earning a bob or two now, aren't you?
30:41So you've actually spoken to Carla?
30:44Not me.
30:45Bet's.
30:46Oh.
30:47So, how is she?
30:50What does she say?
30:51She said she was at a hotel.
30:53I can't believe Bet's actually spoke to her.
30:55It's reassuring, though.
30:57Is it?
30:58I want to be.
30:58Well, doesn't it just confirm what you've been worrying about all along?
31:04That she's ignoring you blatantly.
31:07See.
31:08I'll make a very good barrister, I will, because I've got a very incisive mind.
31:12And also, I'll look great in the wig.
31:15And the...
31:16Oh, I see.
31:18My glass appears to be almost entirely empty.
31:21It's a box.
31:22Hmm.
31:23It's warm, though, isn't it, in here?
31:24It's probably evaporating.
31:26Hi.
31:26Hi, Bonnie.
31:29I'm home.
31:30Oh.
31:31We have company.
31:33Merry Christmas, stranger.
31:35Is that the sister?
31:37Hello.
31:38This is Roy's friend, Evelyn.
31:40Hi, I'm Kim.
31:42Hiya, I spoke to Carla.
31:44Brilliant, finally.
31:46Er, how was she?
31:47It's hard to tell, really.
31:49Erm, what are you doing?
31:52I'm ringing her.
31:53Oh, please.
31:55What?
31:55I mean, like she's going to answer?
32:00Don't you think you should just face facts, love?
32:03And what's that?
32:04You know, maybe.
32:07Maybe?
32:08Maybe.
32:10She's just not cut out to be a lesbian.
32:13No, a lot of people aren't.
32:16No, I wasn't.
32:20Sorry to send you on a wild goose chase.
32:22I honestly thought my charger was in the car.
32:24Forget my old head if it wasn't screwed on.
32:26So, what have you been up to then while me and Kev have been pretending to play up with families?
32:30Oh, just watching paint dry.
32:33Well, sounds like me and you have had very similar days.
32:38Shall we, erm...
32:39Shall we make up for it now?
32:42What exactly were you thinking of?
32:44Well, come to the bedroom and I'll show you.
32:54What's that aftershave you're wearing? It smells different.
32:56Must be that old shower gel I used earlier.
32:59What's this?
33:00It's nice, isn't it?
33:03I found it down the side of the couch.
33:05Must be the previous tenants.
33:10Now, where were we?
33:12En route to the bedroom.
33:14On a one-way ticket to paradise.
33:15I often wonder if you're a statue.
33:26Because you've got one hell of a brass neck on you.
33:29That secret Santa stunt was evil.
33:32I am a grandchild down because of you.
33:35Are you not going to defend me here, Ben?
33:37Why should I?
33:38She's right, it was evil.
33:40I'm not bothered.
33:41Put that drink down, ma.
33:46And get out of my house now.
33:48I beg your pardon.
33:49I want you gone.
33:50Are you going to side with that little tart over me?
33:56Right first time.
34:11His poor, beautiful face.
34:15I do hit him.
34:17Was it, mate?
34:18When a man gets hit like that,
34:20usually over a woman.
34:22Maybe someone's got the hots for Elia.
34:25Who doesn't have the hots for Elia?
34:28Did I just say that out loud?
34:30Yes, George.
34:32Keep it down.
34:33People might think we're swingers.
34:34Oh, like these two?
34:36Behave yourself Mary's if we're swingers.
34:38I'll know what you're doing later.
34:39I'm going to have a nice shiner, thanks to you.
34:43You had no right.
34:44Oh, shut up.
34:46No, he's right.
34:48Adam, I'm sorry.
34:51I shouldn't have reacted the way I did.
34:52I've just spoken to the weaver
34:53and she's explained everything.
34:57Except my apology.
35:00Well, this won't be a Christmas
35:01that we forget any time, see?
35:03You've got a lot to save yourself.
35:06Eh?
35:07Sorry.
35:09And Elia, you've got to believe Adam.
35:11None of it's true.
35:12Oh, I never believed a word.
35:13But you want to have a word with your mother.
35:15Is she calmed down?
35:18She's packing her bags.
35:19Vast her to leave.
35:20What?
35:22Any sign of Megan?
35:23She's gone, eh?
35:25She don't feel well.
35:26She wanted me to tell you, but whoops.
35:29I forgot.
35:29Listen, I know that you've got the hots for your teacher,
35:37you little git,
35:38but how about you leave her for the grown-ups, eh?
35:39There's a good life.
35:40Right.
35:41Thanks very much for a memorable day.
35:45Shall we go next door?
35:46Hey, I always wondered why you were so weird,
35:53but now that I've seen what your granny's capable of,
35:56it's all slipping into place.
36:10David!
36:12David!
36:12David!
36:12David!
36:16Where have you been?
36:18Er, manners, Will.
36:20Been helping Lauren with Frankie so she could work.
36:22Daniel's already gone.
36:23He said to say to her and that.
36:25Er, you need to be careful.
36:28Do I?
36:29Yes, Will, you do.
36:31You were so vile to Daniel today.
36:33Classic.
36:34I defend him, why don't you?
36:36You're going to give the game away at this rate.
36:38And the state of him.
36:40You know, he had his hands all over my woman.
36:43You're drunk.
36:44What's she going to be like on your little weekend away?
36:48Oh, do you know what?
36:51I can't be doing with you when you're like this.
36:59Weird.
37:01I'm sorry, what is that?
37:02It's a stimulator.
37:03Your own mother has got you a...
37:04It's a vagus nerve stimulator.
37:07David, not in front of Lily.
37:08No, no, it's totally sleep.
37:10Shut up!
37:10No, that's what it is.
37:12It's an actual sleep aid.
37:13What?
37:14Granny Gail's texted.
37:15She said she sent us all a video.
37:16Oh, get it up, get it up on tablet.
37:17Go on.
37:18Should we know where for Andy's hair and uncle?
37:19Well, she's put it on plot chart, hasn't it?
37:21She can see it on there.
37:22Oh, I can't believe she sent a video.
37:24One of the longest marriages, is this?
37:36Shh.
37:37Thank you, David, for my extra large jar of olives.
37:43Very funny.
37:45I hope you've all been having the most wonderful day.
37:49And, of course, David, happy birthday.
37:56How can it be 35 years since I first held you in my arms?
38:03I hope by now you've unwrapped your sleep aid.
38:08I just wanted to say that, though I may be far away,
38:16you're all very much in my thoughts.
38:19And, David, and Shona, you and your baby are utmost in my heart.
38:30Life is never easy.
38:34Life is never straightforward.
38:37But we're a strong, resilient family.
38:43And we can weather any storm.
38:47I love you all.
38:49I love you very much.
38:52So, till the next time we speak,
38:55as the famous carol says,
38:59the hopes and fears of all the years
39:08are met in thee tonight.
39:12I wish you all a very happy Christmas.
39:22Happy Christmas.
39:24Aw, that was nice.
39:25I just wanted to say thank you.
39:35What for?
39:38How are you for?
39:40And just being so nice and patient today.
39:44It's our first Christmas, isn't it?
39:48Wanting to be special.
39:52In that case, thank you, too.
39:54For what?
39:56For being you.
39:58Your authentic self.
40:02Can't be easy.
40:04You know, with your various issues.
40:06Unless you were being sarcastic.
40:11I wasn't.
40:15Stand up.
40:18You sure you weren't being sarcastic?
40:20Yeah.
40:26You sure?
40:27Merry Christmas, daughter.
40:34Isn't that, um,
41:02Oujimaflip?
41:04Maggie, yes.
41:04From the pub?
41:05Correct.
41:06Well, introduce me.
41:07I've never met her.
41:08And, you know,
41:08if we pull up,
41:09I'm thinking free drinks.
41:11Hello.
41:12Hello.
41:14Oh, I say,
41:15what a beautiful coat.
41:16I love that colour.
41:18Merry Christmas, Maggie.
41:19I don't know if you, uh,
41:21met my, uh, dear friend,
41:24Evelyn Plummer.
41:24Merry Christmas to you.
41:26And, uh, may 2026
41:28bring you everything
41:28you wish yourself and more.
41:30Are you off travelling?
41:34Uh, are you all right, Maggie?
41:36No.
41:36Any idiot can see
41:37she's not all right.
41:38She's in pieces.
41:39Oh, let's just say
41:41I've fallen out with Ben.
41:44Oh, dear.
41:45Who's Ben?
41:47My son.
41:48Well,
41:49maybe it's just bad karma,
41:51you know,
41:52because you shut the pub
41:53on Christmas Day.
41:54We were having
41:56a family meal,
41:57but
41:57everything went awry.
42:01Well, if there's anything
42:02I could do.
42:04Do you know any decent
42:06hotels around here?
42:08Well, I could drive you
42:10over to Chariot Square,
42:12if you like.
42:13Good thinking, Batman.
42:15And
42:16could you call ahead
42:18when we're en route?
42:19My phone is running
42:20out of juice.
42:21Just tell them
42:22one night,
42:23one person
42:24with breakfast,
42:26and try and get
42:26a free upgrade
42:27to a suite.
42:30Um,
42:31I'm rather sorry
42:33we came over
42:33in the first place.
42:39And
42:40relax.
42:47My lady.
42:49Quite good, sir.
42:51I'm sorry.
42:56Isn't that my line?
42:58I should have been
42:59there for you.
43:00We got there eventually,
43:02didn't we?
43:04I'll never let you
43:05down again.
43:05I'll never let you
43:06see you know
43:06I'll never let you
43:10sing a song
43:12The realm of
43:15in here
43:16I turned my face away
43:20And dreamed about you
43:25Got on a lucky one
43:29Come and let's
43:32into one
43:34I love
43:35I love
43:35I love
43:35I love
43:36I love
43:44I about
43:45I love
43:46I am
43:47I love
43:48I have
43:49I love
43:49I love
43:49I am
43:50I love
43:50I know
43:50I know
43:53I know
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