- 5 hours ago
Happy's Place - Season 2 Episode 4 -
Testing, Testing
Testing, Testing
Category
😹
FunTranscript
00:00One, two, three! Up, up, up, up, up!
00:03Okay, shift in. Right, right, right.
00:05Are you shuffling? Shuffle, small steps back.
00:08Okay, easy. Down, down, down, down, down, down, down.
00:14Okay, yes! Yes!
00:19Wow!
00:20Oh, it looks so good.
00:21So much more space for my new custom desk.
00:24Oh, that was so nice with Dakota to make you a desk.
00:27Yeah, I think he feels bad because his daughter's school project
00:30made me have a meltdown in front of sixth graders
00:32and also question my life choices.
00:35So what's this desk going to look like?
00:37Well, I told Dakota that it needs to be full of possibilities.
00:42No time to take control of my life back.
00:45My first desk had an ashtray.
00:49Aw, man. I already sent Dakota my mood board.
00:53Anyway, thank you guys for your help.
00:55You bet.
00:56And it's toning my arms.
00:58Oh, no. I love a life refresh.
01:02Isabella, we should dye your hair.
01:05Fun!
01:06But no, my hair is perfect.
01:09Okay.
01:11Um, keep or purge?
01:13Or give to Gabby.
01:17I bought that lamp for Gracie.
01:19Aw, I didn't know that.
01:21Yeah.
01:22Chuck it.
01:22Oh, this is 100% cotton, huh?
01:31This is definitely a give to Gabby.
01:33Oh, wow.
01:35Uh, my Stanford sweatshirt.
01:37Mm-hmm.
01:38Oh, that's a keeper.
01:40Getting in was a huge accomplishment.
01:43No.
01:44Nope, Gabby.
01:44It's yours.
01:45You know that is in the past, and I am looking towards the future.
01:49Score!
01:50Red is definitely my color.
01:53Right after fuchsia and burnt umber.
01:55Hey, guys, what do you say we take a little break?
01:59Sure thing.
02:00And don't purge anything in the fuchsia family until I get back.
02:07You okay?
02:08We can trade the lamp in and get your sweatshirt back.
02:12It's silly.
02:14It reminded me how fun school was.
02:16School?
02:16Oh, that thing you got to get through to get to recess?
02:21I'm weird, I know, but I loved it.
02:25You know, pop quizzes, dry erase boards, raising your hand.
02:31You just can't do that in the real world.
02:35I'm sorry, honey.
02:36I don't get it, but I'm still sorry.
02:39Is there anything I can do to help?
02:41No, I'll be okay.
02:42Where do you think you're going without a hall pass, little missy?
02:49My fifth grade teacher, Miss Mackey, would have said that.
02:53You belong in Hat Beach Place
02:58What's up, Dakota?
03:01I still can't figure out this email from Isabella.
03:04Do you know what kind of a desk is Boss Babe Chic?
03:08I'm going to need a little more information.
03:14I'm going to ask my daughter.
03:17Okay, you are never going to believe what just happened to me.
03:20Okay, this lady outside saw the sweatshirt and assumed I went to Stanford.
03:27Really?
03:28I told her I would put in a good word for her son.
03:32People are so gullible.
03:34Oh, I don't know where you stole that, but there's also a school named Stanford.
03:43No, actually...
03:44What are you talking about?
03:46Gabby went to Stanford.
03:48What?
03:48No, she didn't.
03:50Yes, she did.
03:52No, she didn't.
03:55Gabby?
03:57I did.
03:59She was only there for a year, but yeah, she went.
04:04I didn't know that.
04:06Really?
04:07Really.
04:08That's crazy.
04:10Yeah, and she majored in...
04:12Got your ass!
04:16Woo-hoo!
04:18Wow!
04:20Oh, my God!
04:21You totally believed him.
04:23No, see, I knew that.
04:24You only got me for like a second.
04:26I'm not a gullible person.
04:28Emmett is just a way above average liar.
04:30Oh, my gosh.
04:32Do you know what would be so fun?
04:33For the three of us to team up and trick the customers into thinking you went to Stanford?
04:37Exactly!
04:38You know what?
04:39You're pretty quick.
04:41Well, I have pretended to go to Harvard before.
04:43Oh, yeah.
04:45I'm in.
04:46Payback for all their...
04:47Can you put the sauce on the side request?
04:52Hey, Dakota, you want to get in on our prank?
04:55Oak?
04:56Is oak boss babe wood?
05:00Leave the man alone.
05:01He's clearly got wood issues.
05:07Okay.
05:08Open your eyes.
05:10Surprise!
05:12I got you some school supplies.
05:14Aw!
05:16Thank you, Bobby.
05:18But wait, there's more.
05:19I have enrolled us into a class together.
05:23What?
05:24Am I dreaming?
05:25Or are we going back to high school 21 Jump Street style?
05:29No, even better.
05:30It's an online food safety class.
05:33Oh, my gosh.
05:35Oh, my gosh.
05:37The tavern has to be recertified, and I thought we could take it and have some fun.
05:41What do you think about that?
05:42I've never been so excited in my life!
05:46Is there a textbook?
05:47Will?
05:47We should start studying tonight.
05:49How many flashcards do you have in this house right now?
05:51My gut tells me not nearly enough.
06:02Proper refrigerator storage order.
06:03Go!
06:04Okay.
06:04Seafood.
06:06Pork.
06:07Remember our mnemonic.
06:09Susan bashfully poked Gargamel's Pomeranian.
06:12Poultry!
06:16There she is!
06:17Top of her game.
06:18No one's better.
06:19All right.
06:20Okay, your turn, killer.
06:22Uh, what are the two most important steps of pre-shift hand washing?
06:26Easy.
06:27Okay.
06:29Ow!
06:29Ow!
06:30That's so hot!
06:32Step one.
06:33The water must be over 100 degrees Fahrenheit.
06:36Oh, no.
06:37I wish I wore shorter sleeves because...
06:39Step two.
06:40You must wash hands and forearms.
06:45Correct.
06:46And extra points for acting it out.
06:49Hit me with another question.
06:50You know, I thought it might be a good time to take a little break.
06:53From quizzing?
06:54Yes.
06:55Crazy.
06:55I was thinking the same thing.
06:56Okay.
06:57Great minds.
06:57Yeah.
06:58Okay, let's go back to the beginning of this chapter.
07:00My mantra in college was, you haven't read something until you've read it three times.
07:05You know, I don't think you and I would have been friends in college.
07:10My opinion, you haven't really read Shakespeare unless you've read it in the original language.
07:23Wow, Gabby.
07:24Your confidence is unnerving.
07:29It's such a rush, you know?
07:31I feel so powerful, huh?
07:33Oh, oh, oh.
07:34Here comes the guy.
07:35You ready?
07:36Born ready.
07:37Can I get an IPA?
07:38Ah, great choice.
07:40I used to love having an IPA after hitting the books at college up in California's Bay Area.
07:46Yeah.
07:46She went to Stanford.
07:51Seriously?
07:52That's impressive.
07:53Yeah.
07:54And she's too modest to tell you, but she double majored.
07:58I don't like to brag.
08:00Philosophy and science.
08:01Not just science.
08:05Applied robotics.
08:08But they kicked me out of the program for trying to build a robot who could love.
08:12The faculty was scared.
08:17Cowards.
08:19Is she talking your ear off about her days on the lacrosse team?
08:24Nobody wants to hear about my incredible lacrosse career at Stanford University.
08:29Enjoy that IPA.
08:35I will.
08:43What's going on?
08:45We've convinced the entire bar that Gabby went to Stanford.
08:50Isn't that hilarious?
08:52I know, right?
08:53You know?
08:54Why is that funny?
08:56Well, you know, I don't know.
08:59I mean, Steve suggested it.
09:02Why is it funny?
09:04Because Gabby, you know, you're just...
09:06What?
09:09I'm just what?
09:11I'd stop talking.
09:15No, Steve, finish your sentence.
09:16I'm just what?
09:17I'm just a bartender?
09:18I didn't say that.
09:19Yeah, but that's what you meant.
09:20Emmett, help me out here.
09:22Nope.
09:24It's funny because obviously I'm too dumb to go to Stanford, right?
09:29Right?
09:29Yes.
09:30Oh.
09:30I mean, no.
09:32I mean, none of us could have gotten into Stanford.
09:36Okay, so you're saying that it would have been just as funny if you were the one wearing this.
09:41I mean, maybe not as funny.
09:43Oh.
09:44Take the exit ramp, man.
09:51Okay, I can't take much more of this studying.
09:54Was anybody here good at school?
09:58Not the best time for that question.
10:00Okay, I need somebody to step in here because we all care about that girl, but I'm the only one getting punished for it.
10:09Bobby, I hope you're ready for the test tonight.
10:11It's not till next week.
10:13Not the real test.
10:15A head-to-head Thunderdome-style lightning practice test to make sure we're ready for the real test.
10:20See you at close.
10:22Get ready to get crushed!
10:23What's a Thunderdome-style lightning practice test?
10:31Well, I'm glad you asked because you will all be staying to watch.
10:36Oh, no.
10:38Welcome to hell!
10:40So sweet of you to stay for this.
10:48Bobby said we had to.
10:52Well, you will not be disappointed because in my hand I hold 200 practice questions.
10:57No.
10:57200.
10:59Okay, all right.
11:01We're not going to do...
11:02We're not going to do all of them, are we?
11:04I mean, not tonight, but eventually, yes.
11:07Okay, Gabby, will you be our test proctor?
11:09All you have to do is choose a random set of five questions from these.
11:13Oh, gee.
11:15I hope I can figure out how to do that.
11:19I mean, five.
11:22Five.
11:23Is that like six, but small?
11:27Come on, Gabby.
11:29I actually believed you went to Stanford, remember?
11:32That makes me the dumb one.
11:34Wow!
11:36Wow!
11:37No.
11:38No, no, no.
11:39It's not like...
11:40Ah!
11:43So what are the rules and how do I bet on it?
11:47First off, there's no holding back, okay?
11:49I want to win fair and square.
11:52Best of five, no buzzing in.
11:53When you know the answer, you say the answer.
11:55You ready?
11:56Yes.
11:57See?
11:57I knew the answer and I just said it.
12:01Five bucks on Bobby.
12:02Nothing says romance like gambling on your lady.
12:09That's a good investment.
12:11I'll take that action.
12:14Ladies and gentlemen, we have quite a matchup today.
12:17In this corner, we have Bobby McAllister weighing in at...
12:20Bobby, what do you weigh?
12:21One hundred and none of your business.
12:25Fine.
12:26Question one.
12:28How many hours can cold food be held without refrigeration?
12:33Six.
12:33Yes.
12:34Question two.
12:35An infrared thermometer is...
12:37Used to measure temperature without direct contact.
12:40And...
12:40Uh-oh, Bobby.
12:41Looks like my temperature is off the charts.
12:43Oh-oh!
12:44Simmer down.
12:47I'm just getting warmed up.
12:49Question three.
12:50What is the minimum cooking temperature of a veal chop?
12:53One forty-five.
12:54Correct!
12:55Dang it!
12:56If you want to do it right, take it off the heat at one thirty,
12:59tin it with foil, rest it for ten minutes,
13:02and serve with horseradish.
13:09Okay.
13:10Question four.
13:11What does the T stand for in the food safety acronym ALERT?
13:16Assure, look...
13:18Threat.
13:19Yes.
13:20You better watch your back, little sister,
13:22because that's what I am.
13:23Ooh!
13:24Ooh!
13:27Isn't Gabby doing such a good job at this?
13:29Okay.
13:30You're not.
13:34Okay, it is two to two.
13:35Final question.
13:36Winner takes all.
13:38If lasagna is removed from heat at eleven,
13:41by what time must it be served according to safety guidelines?
13:46Five o'clock!
13:47Boom!
13:48Incorrect!
13:49What?
13:52Hot food has a shorter shelf life than cold food.
13:56Three o'clock.
13:56Yes!
13:57And the new food safety champion is a Bobby McAllister.
14:01Woo-hoo!
14:02Woo-hoo!
14:06Always bet on your lady.
14:08Yeah!
14:10Hey, since we're all here, maybe we can talk desks.
14:15Well, since I won so fast, I think we have time for that.
14:19Well, hang on.
14:20That last question wasn't fair, okay?
14:22Gabby picked one that was easy for you.
14:24Isabella, you're being a sore loser.
14:25Well, you're being unfair, but whatever, fine.
14:29You won.
14:30Good for you.
14:31Going home.
14:39First of all, you drive like a maniac.
14:44Didn't you see me behind you flashing my brights?
14:47I thought it was a crazy person.
14:48It was!
14:49Me!
14:50Because you're driving me crazy.
14:52Look, I'm not in the mood to talk right now, Bobby.
14:55Good, because I'm not here to talk.
14:57Pop quiz!
14:58What are you doing?
15:00Oh, you wanted best out of seven.
15:01Well, let's get to it.
15:03Okay?
15:05True or false?
15:06You're acting like a brat.
15:08Please.
15:09True or false?
15:11False.
15:12Wrong answer.
15:15True or false?
15:16You're mad at me, even though this whole time I've been trying to help you.
15:22True.
15:22True.
15:24Okay.
15:25This is the last one, and it's an essay question.
15:29Why?
15:31I don't know.
15:33What school did you go to that you can think, I don't know, is an essay?
15:39Well, I don't.
15:41Okay?
15:42I don't know anything.
15:44I don't know who I am anymore.
15:45I don't know what I'm doing.
15:46I don't know what type of stupid desk to put in my stupid room that'll help me get my life
15:51back together.
15:52That's a lot of pressure to put on a desk.
15:54I know!
15:54It's dumb, but I realize that it's not the fun of school that I miss.
16:04It was a certainty.
16:06You know, I knew exactly who I was, and I just don't know how to get that back.
16:12I hope you never get it back.
16:17Rude.
16:20Look.
16:22Certainty is a trap that keeps your life small.
16:26I was certain that I would never find love again after Travis passed.
16:32I was wrong.
16:34Aw.
16:35Cute.
16:37Can we get back to me, though?
16:41You know what else I was absolutely certain about?
16:44What?
16:45That I didn't need a little sister.
16:47Which is crazy, because you're one of the greatest joys of my life.
16:51Really?
16:52Even when I'm a brat?
16:53Ah, you're not a brat.
16:54You said I was.
16:56I did?
16:56Yeah.
16:57I came in hot.
17:09What's this?
17:10I got you a new sweatshirt, but you can only wear it when you're with me.
17:20It's cute.
17:21I feel like you think I said something I didn't say, and you're mad at me, even though I...
17:28I'm not mad at you, okay?
17:32Okay.
17:33I owe you an apology.
17:37I was acting like a baby, and after seeing Isabella, I realized that is not a good look.
17:45It's okay.
17:46But I'd be more okay with an explanation.
17:48I have this voice in my head, and it is always telling me that I'm not smart enough, or I'm not good enough, or, you know, just not enough.
18:01And that is who I am really mad at.
18:04It's good to know I'm not the only one who does that.
18:09What's your sound like?
18:11Gilbert Gottfried doing an impression of my mom.
18:17Brutal.
18:18Yeah.
18:18I just, I hate it.
18:22You know, and once it starts, I just, I can't make it stop.
18:25You know what I do?
18:26What?
18:27I tell me to leave me the hell alone.
18:30Okay.
18:31Oh, I'm serious.
18:32Hey, me.
18:33You listen to me.
18:36At the end of the day, we're all us, so be nice or else.
18:40Oh, it works.
18:44I swear.
18:45Try it.
18:48Stop being mean to me.
18:51Uh, that's not going to make Mommy Gottfried shut up.
18:55Louder.
18:56Okay.
18:57Stop being mean to me, me.
19:00Yes.
19:01Leave my friend alone.
19:02Yeah.
19:03We are a smart, capable woman, and you don't get to tell us who we are just because you're up there.
19:09So, you know what?
19:10Either pipe down or hit the road, peaches!
19:17That was great.
19:19How do you feel?
19:20Silly.
19:22A little better.
19:24And, you know, you don't just have to talk to yourself.
19:27You can also talk to me.
19:30Thanks, Steve.
19:32You're welcome.
19:33Us damaged people have to stick together.
19:36So, how often do you talk to yourself?
19:41My neighbors think I have a roommate.
19:48Ooh, I can't wait to see it.
19:50This was so sweet of you, Dakota.
19:53Well, furniture's important.
19:55It's like giving somebody a new wooden roommate.
19:57That sounds like a sad kid's movie.
20:02I was struggling.
20:04The first sketch that I had was powerful, but not chic.
20:09And he thought his second sketch was chic, but not powerful.
20:12So, I told him, just make a desk that's like Isabella.
20:18Oak.
20:20Strong and supportive, just like you.
20:22What do you think?
20:23Give to Gabby?
20:26No.
20:27I love it.
20:29It's better than anything I could have imagined.
20:32Thank you, Dakota.
20:34There's no ashtray.
20:37Well, just tell us where to put it.
20:40Us ladies, we already have our system in place.
20:43Back up.
20:44Back up.
20:44Back up.
20:45Back up.
20:45All right, on three.
20:46One, two, three.
20:47Oh!
20:48All right.
20:48Turn.
20:49Turn.
20:49Turn.
20:49Turn.
20:49Turn.
20:49Turn.
20:50Turn.
20:50Turn.
20:50Turn.
20:50Turn.
20:51Turn.
20:51Back it up.
20:52Back it up.
20:52Back it up.
20:53Back it up.
20:53Turn.
20:53Turn.
20:53Turn.
20:54Turn.
20:54Turn.
20:54Turn.
20:55Turn.
20:55Who's not hearing the way?
20:55Down.
20:56Down.
20:56Down.
20:57Down.
20:57Down.
20:58Down.
20:58Down.
20:58Down.
20:59Down.
20:59Down.
20:59Down we go.
21:00Wooh!
21:01Let me see.
21:02Aw, it looks great.
21:04Ooh, not quite done yet.
21:10Now it is.
21:13Give to Gabby?
21:14Give to Gabby?
21:17Awww.
21:18Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
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