- 2 days ago
A pair of clueless rookies find themselves tangled in nonstop trouble as they enter military life. Packed with slapstick humor, unexpected blunders, and classic Laurel & Hardy chaos, this 1941 comedy delivers timeless laughs from start to finish. A must-watch for fans of vintage wartime comedy and golden-era humor.
Category
π₯
Short filmTranscript
00:00:00The End
00:00:30The End
00:01:00Listen, snail, you better look out.
00:01:29You're liable to be stepped on.
00:01:33Now stay right there.
00:01:36Not so loud, Penelope.
00:01:37You're waking the master.
00:01:41Penelope, who's been teaching you to whistle?
00:01:45Hey!
00:01:47Oh, Mr. Forrester in?
00:01:50I'll take it.
00:01:52He's not to be disturbed.
00:01:53Well, it's very important that he gets it.
00:01:55Why? Have you read it?
00:01:57I don't have to. It's from the draft board.
00:01:59Well, Mr. Forrester is not interested.
00:02:01But I'll give it to him anyway.
00:02:03Well, you'd better.
00:02:04Or you'll take a little jaunt to prison.
00:02:10Hey, Ollie.
00:02:11Ollie.
00:02:12Hey, Ollie.
00:02:13If you must make a noise, make it quietly.
00:02:24What is it?
00:02:25Look, from Daniel's draft board.
00:02:28A sheer waste of postage.
00:02:30Imagine even considering a man in Daniel Forrester's physical condition.
00:02:34I know, but I'd better give it to him anyway.
00:02:36What, an overtaxer's heart?
00:02:38Tear it up.
00:02:39Well, he goes to prison if he doesn't get it.
00:02:41Nonsense.
00:02:42I suppose Dr. Schickel's examination isn't good enough.
00:02:46Why, Daniel's allergic to 108 different properties,
00:02:49including candles, cucumbers, and quinces.
00:02:52Well, nevertheless, I'd better deliver it.
00:02:55It's the army or prison.
00:02:56And if he goes to prison, he goes...
00:02:58Hey!
00:02:59Penelope!
00:03:00You come back with that!
00:03:02Good morning, Dr. Schickel.
00:03:03Good morning.
00:03:04What a beautiful morning.
00:03:06The birds are singing.
00:03:07The sun is shining.
00:03:09Everything is alive.
00:03:10Dr. Schickel is here.
00:03:11Good morning, Daniel.
00:03:13Good morning, Dr. Schickel.
00:03:15Anything new?
00:03:16Two more allergies.
00:03:17What are they now?
00:03:19Miniger and feathers.
00:03:21Oh, dear.
00:03:22There, there, ladies.
00:03:23Don't be upset.
00:03:25Your nephew can still have his pablam and orange juice.
00:03:27Oh.
00:03:34Good morning, boys.
00:03:36Come in.
00:03:37Mr. Daniel, may we have a leave of absence for a few years?
00:03:42For a few years?
00:03:44Yeah, and we're going to prison, aren't we, Ollie?
00:03:48What are you talking about?
00:03:50Well, we were going to deliver your draft notice
00:03:53when all of a sudden Penelope...
00:03:54Penelope?
00:03:55Draft notice?
00:03:57My name's come up.
00:03:59Do you think I have a chance, doctor?
00:04:01As much as a snowball in an incubator.
00:04:05Thank heavens.
00:04:06Why, it's perfectly ridiculous.
00:04:08He couldn't even join the Woodcraft boys.
00:04:10Eureka!
00:04:11Penelope, you naughty girl.
00:04:13Thanks, you captain.
00:04:14It's my notice, all right.
00:04:15Yeah, and my airmail.
00:04:16Get this belt out of here.
00:04:18Get to me.
00:04:19Get to me.
00:04:20Get to me.
00:04:21He's allergic to feathers.
00:04:22I'm to appear for induction tomorrow.
00:04:25Oh, there must be some mistake.
00:04:27Maybe they'll take me.
00:04:28Ha!
00:04:29I may just send him a few of your x-rays.
00:04:31But it says I must appear personally, and I'm going.
00:04:45Good morning, everyone.
00:04:47Good morning, Ollie.
00:04:48Not you.
00:04:49Boy, if that guy makes it, my admin, he'll join up.
00:04:51Here you are, sir.
00:04:54Daniel Forrester IV.
00:04:55Sit down, please.
00:04:57Over here, Daniel.
00:04:58Chankley.
00:04:59Chankley.
00:04:59Yes, doctor.
00:05:04Put that match out quick.
00:05:06I don't see a no smoking sign around here.
00:05:08He's allergic to sulfur.
00:05:13Next man.
00:05:14Frank Dombruski.
00:05:15Yes, sir.
00:05:17Dombruski?
00:05:17Yes, sir.
00:05:18In here.
00:05:18Pardon me, captain.
00:05:19I'm Dr. Hugo Schickle.
00:05:21Apparently, through some stupid mistake, my patient has been ordered here for examination.
00:05:27For 15 years, I have struggled to keep this pitiful boy alive.
00:05:31One look at this, and you can readily see he's a doomed man.
00:05:36Army regulations require more than one look, Dr. Schickle.
00:05:40If you'll just step in there, young man.
00:05:44I'm sorry, doctor.
00:05:45Our examinations are conducted by army men only.
00:05:48You'll excuse us.
00:05:50Army doctors.
00:05:53Don't let him out of your sight.
00:05:54You too.
00:06:03Snake bite?
00:06:04I'm testing his blood pressure.
00:06:06Outside, please.
00:06:08You're wasting your time.
00:06:10You won't find any blood.
00:06:12You certainly won't.
00:06:14In fact, for his birthday, we were going to give him a blood transfusion.
00:06:17Please.
00:06:20How old are you, Forrester?
00:06:2123.
00:06:23And already a doddering old man.
00:06:26Take a look at his ribs.
00:06:28You can use them for a washboard.
00:06:30Your blood pressure is perfectly normal, son.
00:06:32I can't believe it.
00:06:34If you'll tap him, you'll find that his blood is pure sugar.
00:06:38Dr. Schickle says he's a walking maple tree.
00:06:42You hear that?
00:06:43His blood is so thin, you can hear it flowing through his veins.
00:06:49Must be the whistle he swallowed.
00:06:51Well, ten years ago, remember?
00:06:52Uh-uh.
00:06:53That's me.
00:06:54Well, keep quiet.
00:06:55What's the verdict, doctor?
00:06:57Perfect.
00:06:57Isn't there anything wrong with me?
00:06:59Nothing that a year in the Army won't cure.
00:07:01You mean he's passed the examination?
00:07:04One hundred percent.
00:07:05Hey, sergeant, the crook says if those draftees aren't in by seven, they don't get breakfast hot or cold.
00:07:20Tell him to keep his pores closed.
00:07:22The train's late.
00:07:23Is that all the men?
00:07:44Oh, there are a couple more inside.
00:07:55You guys think you're on a clam bake?
00:07:57Well, we didn't hear the bugle.
00:07:59There wasn't any bugle.
00:08:01Oh, so that's why we didn't hear it.
00:08:03Pipe down.
00:08:04Now, we've only got to seven.
00:08:06Those who want breakfast, take it on the devil.
00:08:08Uh, Captain, Mr. Forrester is not very strong.
00:08:12In fact, we enlisted to see that he got proper care.
00:08:15Oh, I see.
00:08:16Now, if you'll show us to his suite, we'll serve his breakfast in his room.
00:08:20I'm sorry, gents.
00:08:21We aim to have that left wing finished by the time you got here.
00:08:25But I'll move the general out of his quarters tomorrow.
00:08:27Well, under those circumstances, we'll wait.
00:08:32If any of you men don't want to eat, you're coming along anyway for the exercise.
00:08:36I never eat in the middle of the night.
00:08:38I can eat this for it.
00:08:39What I can go for is a little more short-eye.
00:08:41Hey, where's the cafe?
00:08:43Uh, why, Penelope, what are you doing here?
00:08:46Well, what a small world.
00:08:49What's the idea of that bird?
00:08:50Uh, why, Stan and Penelope are inseparable.
00:08:53Oh, yeah?
00:08:54Well, that vulture ain't gonna camp around here.
00:08:55Now, tell the square before I call out the anti-aircraft.
00:08:58Oh, boy, did you hear what he said?
00:09:00You better fly on home.
00:09:01Oh, Penelope, go on.
00:09:03It's 1,500 miles.
00:09:06As the crow flies.
00:09:08Yeah, and turn to your left at St. Louis.
00:09:13Bye.
00:09:14All right, men, follow me.
00:09:15On the double.
00:09:16On the double.
00:09:18Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
00:09:23Hey.
00:09:29Plate and butter.
00:09:30Oh, my God.
00:09:59All right, Ben, leave your luggage here.
00:10:29Breakfast on the double.
00:10:50Thank you, Ollie.
00:10:51Get to the end of the line, Blimp.
00:10:58How do you like that guy trying to easy in there?
00:11:00Come on.
00:11:01Come on.
00:11:02Come on.
00:11:03Come on.
00:11:04Come on.
00:11:05Come on.
00:11:06Come on.
00:11:07Come on.
00:11:08Come on.
00:11:09Come on.
00:11:10Come on.
00:11:11Come on.
00:11:12Come on.
00:11:13Come on.
00:11:14Come on.
00:11:15Come on.
00:11:16Come on.
00:11:17Come on.
00:11:18Come on.
00:11:19Come on.
00:11:20Come on.
00:11:21Come on.
00:11:22Come on.
00:11:23All right, now, take it easy. I've only got two hands.
00:11:36Stay in forever, buddy, boy. Take your turn.
00:11:53Get some butter.
00:12:23Sanka? You're welcome.
00:12:38Here we are. Well done, Stanley. Thank you, Alden.
00:12:45Hey, look. Hey, listen. You, you candy.
00:12:52Don't you know that you're allergic to albumin?
00:12:55I'm starved, and I'm going to eat.
00:12:57And you heard what Dr. Schickle said about pumpernickel?
00:13:00Yeah, and you heard what the army doctor said about Schickle.
00:13:03Here, Daniel. There's a seven-course dinner in one of these teeny little pills.
00:13:07In fact, a concentrated banquet.
00:13:09Does it have bacon and eggs in it?
00:13:11No, but it has essence of guinea fowl.
00:13:14Yeah, and spirits of spinach. Go on, it's good for you.
00:13:17No, boys. I'm going to eat food, even if it kills me.
00:13:23It's suicide.
00:13:24Now, look, fellows. It would swell of you to join the army to be with me,
00:13:28but you have enough to do serving your Uncle Sam without serving me.
00:13:32We can take care of both of you.
00:13:36Well, in the meantime, you better take care of your own breakfast. Look.
00:13:39Pardon me, but haven't you gentlemen made a slight mistake?
00:13:44Those are our eggs.
00:13:45Yeah? When did you lay them?
00:13:48I laid them on the tray just a minute ago, didn't I only?
00:13:50Yes. Did you hear anyone, Captain?
00:13:53No, I mean.
00:13:54Say, listen, we don't want to have any trouble, but really, we are hungry.
00:13:58And we haven't eaten for three days.
00:14:00Yesterday, today, and tomorrow.
00:14:02An army travels on its stomach, you know.
00:14:05What are you beefing about?
00:14:06You've got enough there to make China and back.
00:14:09Now, get going.
00:14:11Come on.
00:14:12Well, we don't know the way to China.
00:14:15How could we keep getting...
00:14:17Boy, am I hungry.
00:14:19Well, there's a seven-course dinner and one of these pills.
00:14:22And that ought to hold you till lunch.
00:14:24All right, men.
00:14:25I'm going over to the reception center.
00:14:27We've only got 20 minutes, so let's get going on the double.
00:14:36Come on.
00:14:41Ollie, what?
00:14:42I'm still hungry.
00:14:44Glutton.
00:14:45I said I'd double.
00:14:46Come on.
00:14:47Come on.
00:15:06Good morning, Sergeant.
00:15:07Good morning, Colonel.
00:15:08A likely looking bunch of men, Sergeant.
00:15:09Thank you, sir.
00:15:10I guess I spoke too soon.
00:15:11Yes, sir.
00:15:12I guess I spoke too soon.
00:15:13Yes, sir.
00:15:15Is this uniform the best they could do?
00:15:17Oh, I don't mind.
00:15:33Why, yes, sir.
00:15:41Is this uniform the best I could do?
00:15:43Oh, I don't mind. The man said I'd grow into it.
00:15:46Say, Dad, would you mind taking a picture, Russ?
00:15:49We want to show the folks back home how we look.
00:15:52Why, certainly.
00:15:54Thank you. Not too close.
00:15:56Yes, get back just a minute.
00:16:03Give it a little dignity.
00:16:07Ready?
00:16:08Shoot, Pop.
00:16:12There you are.
00:16:13If they turn out good, we'll give you one.
00:16:14Good.
00:16:15How long have you been in the army, buddy?
00:16:1732 years.
00:16:19You must be a sergeant.
00:16:21No, surely a corporal.
00:16:24I'm afraid I'm not that lucky.
00:16:2632 years in the army and not even a corporal?
00:16:31Stan, at last I've met somebody that's dumber than you.
00:16:38Attention!
00:16:41Carry on, sergeant.
00:16:42Penelope, you mustn't hang around here.
00:16:44What is this, a circus?
00:16:46Sergeant, get rid of that bird immediately.
00:16:48Yes, sir.
00:16:54What did I ever do to deserve a couple of yaps like you?
00:16:57Maybe you were good to your mother.
00:16:59Pipe down!
00:17:00Yes, sir.
00:17:01Now, at 10 o'clock, you're all going over for an IQ test.
00:17:04And according to the answers you give, you'll be classified in a job.
00:17:07Swell, we're good at quizzes, aren't we, Ollie?
00:17:10Maybe they'll put me in the intelligence corps.
00:17:12Brother, you're with them.
00:17:14Right now.
00:17:15Right now.
00:17:34Where can I get some films developed?
00:17:36Hammond's Photoshop, over there.
00:17:38Thanks.
00:17:51Oh, hello, sergeant.
00:17:52Hi.
00:17:53Hey, we seem to be bumping into each other today.
00:17:55You'll get used to that.
00:17:57Where's the clerk?
00:17:58I want to have some films developed.
00:17:59If you're in a hurry, just drop them in that box and leave your name on them.
00:18:02Oh, well, my camera's jammed here.
00:18:04Oh, yeah?
00:18:05Yeah, I love that for you.
00:18:06Oh, not in the light.
00:18:07Gee, you'll spoil the film.
00:18:08Oh, no, but don't...
00:18:09Oh, hello.
00:18:10Be with you in a moment.
00:18:11I can wait.
00:18:12Oh, Hippo, I can't find your pictures anywhere.
00:18:13Are you in a hurry?
00:18:14But maybe I can help you find them.
00:18:15I got eyes like an owl.
00:18:16Yes, and hands like an octopus.
00:18:17I'll get along better if you stay outside.
00:18:18Oh, Ginger, you got me all wrong.
00:18:19Remember?
00:18:20Out of bounds.
00:18:21Boy, ain't she the essence of peppermint, huh?
00:18:22She's very nice.
00:18:23What do you mean, very nice?
00:18:24She's the best filly that ever hit the cavalry.
00:18:25Well, perhaps if I knew her better, I...
00:18:26Oh, forget it, soldier.
00:18:27You won't have time to.
00:18:28I found them, Hippo.
00:18:29They were in with Colonel Higgins.
00:18:30Jumping, yacht birds.
00:18:31It's a good thing he didn't see them.
00:18:32They're snaps of meat.
00:18:33Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:18:35Mr.
00:19:05Maybe I'd better do it for you.
00:19:06I don't want to put you to any trouble.
00:19:08Well, that's what I'm here for.
00:19:11That don't add up.
00:19:14Now, you turn that little key.
00:19:17It's really jammed, all right.
00:19:20Now, slip your hand under mine.
00:19:21Now, when I squeeze, you pull the catch.
00:19:24All right, I'm ready.
00:19:25There.
00:19:27Shall I unroll it?
00:19:28Well, why not develop it?
00:19:29Will it take long?
00:19:30Just a few minutes.
00:19:35You haven't been in the army long, have you?
00:19:37How can you tell?
00:19:38Oh, I don't know.
00:19:39You looked kind of shy when you came here.
00:19:41Well, I was sort of surprised to see a girl here.
00:19:44Especially such a pretty woman.
00:19:47Now, you're beginning to sound like a trooper.
00:19:49Is that good?
00:19:50Well, not in the darkroom.
00:19:54What's that, a balloon?
00:19:56No, that's my friend, Oliver.
00:19:58Well, what's that next to it?
00:19:59Well, that's the other one, Stan.
00:20:01They used to work for me.
00:20:02And now we're buddies.
00:20:03Has Ripley seen them?
00:20:05Oh, no.
00:20:15I'm sorry, Hippo.
00:20:16Was there something else?
00:20:17Well, don't you want to collect the pictures?
00:20:19Oh, you're going to pay cash this time?
00:20:21Yeah.
00:20:22How much?
00:20:22$1.20.
00:20:23Excuse me, when will my pictures be finished?
00:20:25Tomorrow night.
00:20:26Well, I'll be in.
00:20:26Oh, wait a minute.
00:20:27What's your name?
00:20:27Well, never mind.
00:20:28I'll bring him.
00:20:28He's in my troop.
00:20:29Oh, you needn't bother, Sergeant.
00:20:31I can pick them up.
00:20:32Oh, no bother at all.
00:20:33Always glad to do a favor for a pal.
00:20:35See you later, Gigi.
00:20:36Goodbye.
00:20:37Oh, say, Sergeant.
00:20:38You're a nice fellow.
00:20:40Listen, Wolf.
00:20:42The next time you want pictures developed, just drop them in that box and evacuate.
00:20:45But, Sergeant...
00:20:45That dark room's out of bounds, see?
00:20:47Yeah, but...
00:20:47You want to learn how to develop pictures?
00:20:49Transfer of a signal code.
00:20:50Yeah, but my camera was jammed.
00:20:52Oh, yeah?
00:20:52The next time, I'm going to jam that camera right there.
00:20:56That's assembly.
00:20:57Now, get going.
00:20:58In the meantime, I'm going to pick out a nice, coarse job for you.
00:21:01Well, thank you, Sergeant.
00:21:03They don't even give them a parachute.
00:21:28Or a pillow.
00:21:30Stay with him, boys.
00:21:31Stay with him, boys.
00:21:33How do you like that for riding, Ginger?
00:21:35That's Corporal Peters, isn't it?
00:21:37Yeah.
00:21:38One of the sorliest guys in the troop.
00:21:39Stay with him, boys.
00:21:40Stay with him.
00:21:41He couldn't even ride a rockin' horse when he first came in here.
00:21:45I taught him everything he knows.
00:21:47Woo!
00:21:48How come on, Gigi?
00:21:49Woo!
00:21:50Is that so?
00:21:52How do you like that?
00:21:59Now, listen, men.
00:22:00If you think we put on this rodeo just to entertain you guys, you're wrong.
00:22:05After you get your training, some of you will do a hitch ride in this corral.
00:22:09Now, the Army needs riders to bust remounts.
00:22:12Any of you guys that have had horse experience, we can use you.
00:22:15I've been tangled with Bronx ever since I was knee-high to a coyote, Sarge.
00:22:19Good.
00:22:22How about you, Mr. Moneybags?
00:22:29Well, I did some riding on our estate in Vermont.
00:22:32But then he was only a little twerp.
00:22:35That was long before he was stricken.
00:22:37I see you got your alibi all set up.
00:22:40All right, you can cough up that silver spoon right now.
00:22:42Because in the Army, we all start from scratch.
00:22:47Just a minute, Sergeant.
00:22:49I'll give it a try.
00:22:50Daniel.
00:22:51Daniel.
00:22:53Don't say that.
00:22:54Why, he couldn't even be trusted on a merry-go-round.
00:22:57It's suicide, Sergeant.
00:22:59Well, what do you say, soldier?
00:23:01Get a horse ready.
00:23:03Okay.
00:23:04Hey, Murph.
00:23:04Throw a saddle in that new one.
00:23:06806.
00:23:07Listen, Daniel.
00:23:08Come back here.
00:23:09Aunt Agatha and Martha will never forgive us.
00:23:11Listen.
00:23:11Good luck, soldier.
00:23:30Don't you know that you're allergic to horses, too?
00:23:32Let him go.
00:23:34Let him go.
00:23:35It's a long time.
00:23:36Hey, you.
00:23:37Get up there.
00:23:40It's all on.
00:23:41Oh, I think he's dead.
00:23:44Oh, I think he's dead.
00:23:45Oh.
00:23:45I think he's dead.
00:23:46Oh.
00:23:46Is he still on the horse?
00:23:48Look.
00:23:48Oh.
00:23:48Look.
00:23:49Come on!
00:23:51Dad!
00:23:58He's doing all night.
00:24:00Why, sure.
00:24:07What a rider.
00:24:09Yeah, but he ain't riding regulation.
00:24:11Look at that hump on his back. It looks like a knapsack.
00:24:16Look at the way he's hanging out of that saddle.
00:24:19That's what I call disgusting.
00:24:22Why don't you show him how, Sergeant?
00:24:25All right, I will.
00:24:27Pick him up!
00:24:34Hey, you're old Merv and no talent.
00:24:37I'll show you how to ride regulation.
00:24:39Get a load of this technique.
00:24:46Let it go!
00:24:49Let it go!
00:24:50Let it go!
00:24:51Let it go!
00:24:52Let it go!
00:25:01You guys went well and ready!
00:25:02I was going well and ready!
00:25:03I was going well!
00:25:04I was going well and ready!
00:25:05I was going well and ready!
00:25:06Hi, Scoot!
00:25:07Hi, Scoot!
00:25:08Oh, come on!
00:25:10Oh, come on!
00:25:11Oh, come on!
00:25:12Whew!
00:25:13Whew!
00:25:14Whew!
00:25:15Whew!
00:25:16Whew!
00:25:17Whew!
00:25:19Whew!
00:25:20Whew!
00:25:21Whew!
00:25:22So you thought it was funny when the horse threw the sergeant?
00:25:24I thought it was funny when the horse threw the sergeant.
00:25:27Well, after all, I only smiled out loud.
00:25:29Yeah, you smiled so loud that he had us tow these nags
00:25:33five miles uphill just to exercise them.
00:25:37Well, it'll do them good.
00:25:39Well, I'm going to take a little nap right here.
00:25:43Well, I guess the army wouldn't miss a little nap,
00:25:45but we'd better not oversleep.
00:25:47We'll take turns, 10 minutes each.
00:25:49That's a good idea.
00:25:51Oh, boy.
00:25:54Boy, this is...
00:26:00Selfish.
00:26:14What's that?
00:26:15You don't think the declare war would have asked me.
00:26:18The horses!
00:26:19Oh, what'll the sergeant say?
00:26:20We'd better get back to camp.
00:26:24It's 92%.
00:26:26Take it through again, Smitty.
00:26:28No.
00:26:30No.
00:26:32No.
00:26:33No.
00:26:34No.
00:26:35No.
00:26:36No.
00:26:37No.
00:26:38No.
00:26:39Hits 92 percent.
00:26:43Take it through again, Smitty.
00:26:54Look.
00:26:55It's only a dead dud.
00:26:59Don't throw it away. We'll keep it as a souvenir.
00:27:02All right.
00:27:03Hey, look.
00:27:05Let's steal a ride back to camp.
00:27:10Okay, come on.
00:27:28Strange looking vehicle, isn't it?
00:27:30Yeah, it looks like one of those election campaign wagons.
00:27:33Maybe they're electing a new general.
00:27:36Well, if the sergeant's running, I'm not so sure if I'd vote for him or not.
00:27:41That goes double.
00:27:45Commence!
00:27:46Flying!
00:27:57What's that?
00:27:58Sounds like an Oregon woodpecker.
00:28:00No, an Oregon woodpecker makes a much softer sound.
00:28:04That's more like the Tennessee woodpecker that thrives on hickory.
00:28:07Hmm.
00:28:08It goes something like this.
00:28:09Duck, duck, duck, duck, duck, duck, duck, duck, duck, duck, duck, duck, duck.
00:28:15Is it that loud?
00:28:17Did I hear shooting?
00:28:19No, that was you imitating a woodpecker.
00:28:22And very good, too.
00:28:29Did you notice these holes before?
00:28:32I don't remember.
00:28:38We were at war.
00:28:39The enemy's firing on us.
00:28:40I can't hear, sir.
00:28:41Machine guns!
00:28:42No!
00:28:43What?
00:28:44Get down, do you wanna be killed?
00:28:45No!
00:28:46No!
00:28:47What?
00:28:48Get down, do you wanna be killed?
00:28:59Pulling your tummy.
00:29:04Stop shooting!
00:29:05We'll surrender.
00:29:06We'd better report this.
00:29:07We'd better g-g-g-get out of here.
00:29:08Let's go.
00:29:31Well, I'm a pigeon-toed prairie.
00:29:34The pigeon-toed prairie dog.
00:29:39Did you boys get lost?
00:29:41What an experience we've had.
00:29:43We sure have.
00:29:44What now?
00:29:45We're at war.
00:29:46What are you talking about?
00:29:47We were attacked by a nest full of machine guns.
00:29:50Yeah, and they weren't woodpeckers either.
00:29:53You boys better watch your diet.
00:29:55There you are, Stan.
00:29:56I told you he wouldn't believe us.
00:29:58Look.
00:30:00Where'd you get that?
00:30:01On the battlefield.
00:30:02We're gonna make a bud vase for Aunt Agatha and Martha.
00:30:05How?
00:30:06Well, like this.
00:30:08Oh!
00:30:09It's all right.
00:30:10It's only a dud dead.
00:30:11A dead dud.
00:30:12See?
00:30:13It's all tarnished.
00:30:14Won't that make a pretty souvenir after it's polished?
00:30:16Look.
00:30:17It's full of powder.
00:30:18Huh.
00:30:20Hey!
00:30:21That's Private Mealy's tobacco.
00:30:23So it is.
00:30:24I'll take it outside and sift it.
00:30:26Yeah, we'll sift it.
00:30:27Oh!
00:30:28There you are!
00:30:31Those horses came in alone and sweating.
00:30:33Where you been?
00:30:34Didn't they tell you what happened?
00:30:35Didn't who tell me?
00:30:36The horses.
00:30:37No, I mean the...
00:30:38Funny man, huh?
00:30:39Now, we've got news for you, Sarge, haven't we?
00:30:41Yeah.
00:30:42Yeah?
00:30:43Spill it.
00:30:44We're at war!
00:30:45Look.
00:30:46They shot him off!
00:30:48Now, give me that malarkey.
00:30:50Why, this tent looks like a flop house.
00:30:53Do you guys have pillow fights?
00:30:55No, sir.
00:30:56We're too tired for that.
00:30:57We're having a surprise inspection by General Taylor.
00:31:00Who's that?
00:31:01Never mind!
00:31:02Now, police up this tent and get into your dress O.D.'s right away.
00:31:05Yes, sir.
00:31:06That goes for you too, Mr. Pottergold.
00:31:09Will I have time to wash up?
00:31:11All right.
00:31:12But make it snappy.
00:31:17Come on!
00:31:18Get with it!
00:31:19On the double?
00:31:20Yeah!
00:31:25Make up this cart regulation!
00:31:26Yes, sir.
00:31:27And this one too!
00:31:28Yes, sir.
00:31:39Just a minute, Sergeant.
00:31:40I...
00:31:41None of your lip, rookie.
00:31:42And fold that blanket like I showed you.
00:31:43But please, sir.
00:31:44That's not...
00:31:45I suppose you're gonna tell me how to make a bed.
00:31:46No, but, uh...
00:31:47And there's no buts in the army.
00:31:48What are you two yaps doing?
00:31:49Playing games?
00:31:50No, sir.
00:31:51We were only trying to tell you.
00:31:52You ain't telling me anything.
00:31:53Now, stop your arguing.
00:31:54If you guys spoil Troop D's reckon I'll run you through a meat grinder.
00:31:58Now, rattle your hocks.
00:31:59But you won't listen.
00:32:00Now, get this.
00:32:01I'm the big noise around here, and you guys do the listening, see?
00:32:02Give me a magic.
00:32:03Give me a magic.
00:32:34And you yaps be ready.
00:32:40The sergeant is certainly a headstrong man.
00:32:42You're right.
00:32:43He doesn't appreciate real friends.
00:32:46What was that?
00:32:47I heard something, too.
00:32:48Uh, uh, possibly a woodpecker.
00:32:58Look.
00:32:59They've assigned a supporter.
00:33:00You may start over here, my good man.
00:33:02And you may have Thursdays off.
00:33:04Twice a week.
00:33:06Listen, you junkheads.
00:33:08Why, it sounds like Sergeant Hippo.
00:33:10It sure does.
00:33:11It is Sergeant Hippo.
00:33:15In camouflage.
00:33:16Listen, I don't care if it takes me the rest of my life.
00:33:19I'm gonna find out which of you two guys.
00:33:21Have any of you men seen Sergeant Hippo?
00:33:23Yes, sir.
00:33:25What are you trying to do?
00:33:26Put on a minstrel show?
00:33:28You know we've got an inspection in ten minutes.
00:33:30Yes, sir.
00:33:31You're a fine example for the new men.
00:33:33Now get out of here and try to make yourself look something like a trooper.
00:33:36Yes, Lieutenant.
00:33:38Carry on.
00:33:40Did you get a load of the big noise?
00:33:43There's a roof!
00:33:44Oh, Black Joe!
00:33:46I never told you that!
00:33:48I didn't need an agressive laugh!
00:34:02Attention!
00:34:16Hi, buddies.
00:34:19Present house!
00:34:39Of all the insolent, stubborn...
00:34:41we're shipping her home tomorrow by air express.
00:34:43She'll never stand the altitude.
00:34:45Well, it's up to you to get rid of that bird...
00:34:47before the army gets rid of us.
00:34:49What am I going to do with it?
00:34:52Ditch her somewhere. Quick, here comes the Colonel...
00:34:54the General and the whole outfit. Hurry up.
00:34:56Quick, hold this gun.
00:34:58All right, hurry up now. Get rid of it.
00:35:13What did you want to put that in my pants for?
00:35:15What was that?
00:35:19A frog in the throat.
00:35:23Yes, sir.
00:35:25Are you men with Troop D?
00:35:27Yes, sir. We're neighbors of Troop C.
00:35:29They're the swellest bunch.
00:35:33Are you nervous, son?
00:35:35A little, sir.
00:35:37Oh, I'm sorry.
00:35:39I'm sorry.
00:35:41What was that?
00:35:42Uh, frog in the throat.
00:35:43Yes, sir.
00:35:44Are you men with Troop D?
00:35:46Yes, sir. We're neighbors of Troop C.
00:35:48They're the swellest bunch.
00:35:50Are you nervous, son?
00:35:57A little, sir.
00:35:59He's a sensitive type.
00:36:04Now, just relax, soldier.
00:36:06I'll try to...
00:36:08As you were!
00:36:13What is all this?
00:36:15We like him, sir. He's very nice to us.
00:36:20Turn that over!
00:36:50Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh.
00:36:59Was that a blackbird?
00:37:01Oh, no, sir. They don't come this far south.
00:37:04Get that wall-eyed peacock out of there.
00:37:06Yes, sir.
00:37:07Oh!
00:37:12Was that a blackbird?
00:37:13Oh, no, sir. They don't come this far south.
00:37:15Get that wall-eyed peacock out of there!
00:37:18Yes, sir.
00:37:20Ugh!
00:37:22Ah!
00:37:25Ah!
00:37:26Take Highway 66, and when you get the...
00:37:38You call this a military formation?
00:37:43I want a full report of this sent to headquarters at once.
00:37:53Dismissed!
00:37:54No!
00:37:59I was never so humiliated in all my life.
00:38:03Nothing to laugh at. I thought you were pretty good.
00:38:07If I had known the army was going to be this much fun,
00:38:09I would have enlisted long ago.
00:38:11It's all in the point of view.
00:38:13Well, I'm going over to get those pictures we took.
00:38:15So long, boys.
00:38:16Goodbye.
00:38:17Hope they turn out good.
00:38:19Stanley, I'm worried about that boy.
00:38:21What's the matter?
00:38:22He's been acting very strange the last day or two.
00:38:24Strange?
00:38:25He's too happy.
00:38:26Huh.
00:38:27You know how he was before he went into Watson's malady.
00:38:29I'll never forget it.
00:38:31That was terrible.
00:38:33I'll never forget it.
00:38:34Say, Ollie.
00:38:35What?
00:38:36What time is it?
00:38:37It's nearly half past.
00:38:38Thank you, Ollie.
00:38:39Thank you, Ollie.
00:38:40Say, Ollie.
00:38:41What?
00:38:42What time is it?
00:38:43It's nearly half past.
00:38:44Thank you, Ollie.
00:38:45Hello there, Trooper.
00:38:46Good evening.
00:38:47Hey, what's this?
00:38:48Hey, what's this?
00:38:49Did I win the daily double?
00:38:50Did I win the daily double?
00:38:51Oh, no.
00:38:52What's this?
00:38:53Did I win the daily double?
00:38:54Oh, no.
00:38:55What time is it?
00:38:56What time is it?
00:38:57It's nearly half past.
00:38:58Thank you, Ollie.
00:38:59What time is it?
00:39:00Thank you, Ollie.
00:39:01Thank you, Ollie.
00:39:02Good evening.
00:39:03Hey, what's this?
00:39:04Did I win the daily double?
00:39:05Oh, that was a dollar bill you gave me.
00:39:06I thought it was a five.
00:39:08Even so, you counted out ten.
00:39:09You'll never get rich.
00:39:10I know this off.
00:39:11Anyway, what's money?
00:39:12You're scraps of paper.
00:39:13Hey, what's this? Did I win the daily gobble?
00:39:18Oh, that was a dollar bill you gave me. I thought it was a five.
00:39:21Even so, you counted out ten. You'll never get rich.
00:39:24I know this all. Anyway, what's money?
00:39:27Me and scraps of paper? I hate it.
00:39:29Uh, me too. Come on, how about another nickel?
00:39:32Oh, dear. I must be slipping.
00:39:34Good night, Ginger.
00:39:36Good night.
00:39:37Are my pictures finished?
00:39:38Well, you didn't give me your name when you left them.
00:39:40Oh, they're easily identified. I'm in the pictures.
00:39:43Oh, yes. Now, let's see.
00:39:45I remember there was one with you standing with an observation balloon
00:39:48and a fire hider.
00:39:49That's the one with Oliver and Stan.
00:39:51They're still in the darkroom. You want to see them?
00:39:53It's not too much trouble.
00:39:54Come on in.
00:39:57Here they are.
00:40:00That's my first day at camp.
00:40:01Just before they issued you your muscles.
00:40:03That's right.
00:40:04Apparently, the Army agrees with you.
00:40:06Oh, I like it more all the time.
00:40:08It seems to me I've heard that record played around here before.
00:40:11Maybe you have, but I find Army life very fascinating.
00:40:16Oh, I thought you meant...
00:40:17Well, that's exactly what I meant.
00:40:19In spite of the hard work, I like it.
00:40:21Oh, look. A double exposure.
00:40:23Oh, we've spoiled that one. I'm on it twice.
00:40:26Well, I don't think that spoils it.
00:40:29What? That's me on a bucking horse.
00:40:35Boy, I sure had my hands full.
00:40:37Yes, isn't that a good action shot?
00:40:39Yeah.
00:40:40I know.
00:40:51Well, hello, Hibba.
00:40:52Hiya, Ginge.
00:40:53How's about zooming over to San Felipe tonight, huh?
00:40:55Zooming?
00:40:56Yeah, I just borrowed a dispatch motorcycle and took off the sidecar.
00:40:59You're riding up in the gas tank.
00:41:00On a motorcycle?
00:41:01Yeah, jump into a pair of slacks and let's get to whizzing, huh?
00:41:03Oh, not me, pal.
00:41:04All right, we'll take the bus, then.
00:41:06Not tonight, thanks, Hibba, my boy.
00:41:08Listen, you can't do that to me, Ginger.
00:41:10Billy over at the tailor shop wanted me to take cover.
00:41:12I said, no, you and me had a date.
00:41:14Well, now, isn't that dandy?
00:41:16Maybe I have a date.
00:41:17Come on, let's get going, will ya?
00:41:19Sorry, Hippo.
00:41:20Listen, Sugarfoot, little old Hibbs has had a tough day,
00:41:23and he sure could use some giggling.
00:41:27Here's one of Sergeant Hippo that'll make you laugh.
00:41:30Oh, hello, Sergeant. Did you see this?
00:41:33I ain't interested.
00:41:35Now, listen, Mr. Gotbrox, what did I tell you about that darkroom?
00:41:38Well, I looked up regulations.
00:41:39I say it's out of bounds.
00:41:41It happens to be a private concession, Sergeant.
00:41:43Yeah, so I noticed.
00:41:45Oh, now, let's not have a row, Hippo.
00:41:47There won't be any row if Mr. Fancy Pants here stays out of that darkroom.
00:41:50Oh, well, if you'll excuse me, I...
00:41:52With muscles.
00:41:53Wait a minute.
00:41:54Aren't you going to keep your date with me?
00:41:56What?
00:41:57You mean you got a date with him?
00:42:00Yes, I'm sorry, Hippo.
00:42:01You see, I made it just a moment before you came in.
00:42:03How do you like that?
00:42:04Well, he ain't even a first-class private.
00:42:06Well, I think he is.
00:42:07Even if he doesn't wear it on his sleeve.
00:42:10Ginger, you murder me.
00:42:12Now, look.
00:42:13If you hurry, you might catch Millie.
00:42:15I murdered that.
00:42:17Yeah.
00:42:18Hey, and that darkroom is still out of bounds.
00:42:23Now, that's a character.
00:42:24Yeah, he is different.
00:42:25I hope I wasn't being too presumptuous in telling him I had a date with you.
00:42:27Oh, that's all right.
00:42:28I don't mind.
00:42:29Well, I'll see you tomorrow.
00:42:30Wait a minute, soldier.
00:42:31You're a peculiar duck.
00:42:32Are you married or engaged or something?
00:42:33No, nothing like that.
00:42:34Why?
00:42:35Were you just born frightened?
00:42:36I don't remember.
00:42:37They never let me get around much before now.
00:42:39Say, how would you like to keep that date with me?
00:42:42That'd be swell.
00:42:43Well, fine.
00:42:44I'll get my hat.
00:42:45Well, what do you know?
00:43:15Any sign of Daniel?
00:43:17The men haven't seen him.
00:43:19Maybe he deserted.
00:43:20Us?
00:43:21No, the Army.
00:43:22Now, what'll he do without you and me?
00:43:24I shouldn't wonder.
00:43:26Well, it's getting late, and if he's not back by next Thursday,
00:43:29I'm going to notify the War Department.
00:43:32That's a good idea.
00:43:45I'll be right back.
00:45:15Oh, I am. It's a wonderful hobby.
00:45:18What's come over you?
00:45:19You never sung before.
00:45:21Well, I never had anything to sing about before.
00:45:23Is merely developing pictures such a joy?
00:45:27More than I ever realized.
00:45:29That kid's got me worried.
00:45:34He certainly has changed.
00:45:37Wouldn't know it with the same boy.
00:45:51Uh, Stanley, what time is it?
00:45:55It's about happiness.
00:45:57Something went wrong.
00:46:08Oh.
00:46:26Something out of bounds, huh?
00:46:29Out of bounds, huh?
00:46:31Not for me, it isn't.
00:46:33Not anymore.
00:46:35Can't see.
00:46:37Ginger.
00:46:38Ginger.
00:46:39Why, it's the dark room.
00:46:42And it isn't out of bounds for me, is it?
00:46:45Cynamulism.
00:46:46Some talk.
00:46:47I knew that Daniel would never withstand the rigors of army life.
00:46:51Do you think we ought to phone Dr. Schickel?
00:46:53I love you, Ginger.
00:46:55Hear that?
00:46:55He loves Ginger.
00:46:57Never could eat at home.
00:46:59You'll love Agatha and Martha.
00:47:01Now I know he's dreaming.
00:47:03Do you think Ginger could be a woman?
00:47:06Could be a cookie.
00:47:07It's a dark room.
00:47:09A beautiful dark room.
00:47:12Just let me look at you, Ginger.
00:47:14It is a cookie.
00:47:15He is in love.
00:47:17His heart will never stand it.
00:47:19Daniel, Daniel.
00:47:20You're too late, Sergeant.
00:47:21It's me, Oliver.
00:47:22Oh, what's the matter?
00:47:24Who's Ginger?
00:47:26She's the most wonderful girl in the world.
00:47:30Here, take one of these.
00:47:31It'll make you forget her.
00:47:32I don't want to forget her.
00:47:34Remember what Dr. Schickel said about your heart.
00:47:36A romance would be fatal.
00:47:39Oh, please, boys.
00:47:41Go back to sleep and let me dream.
00:47:44All right, but don't overdo it.
00:48:06You may wait for us, my good man.
00:48:28I hope it won't take long.
00:48:31You know, after four o'clock,
00:48:32we pay overtime for these outfits.
00:48:35She'll be putty in my hands.
00:48:47Virginia Hammond.
00:48:48Virginia Hammond.
00:48:49Miss Hammond lives upstairs in 204.
00:48:52Thank you very much.
00:48:52That's right.
00:49:00Second floor.
00:49:01Oh, thank you very much.
00:49:04Hmm.
00:49:05Do you remember what you're supposed to be?
00:49:17Sure, I'm a typhoon.
00:49:18Not typhoon.
00:49:20Tycoon.
00:49:21A Wall Street tycoon.
00:49:23With a stock on the seat exchange.
00:49:25That's right.
00:49:27Just forget it.
00:49:28I'll do the talking.
00:49:30Stock on the seating.
00:49:31How do you do?
00:49:43Miss Hammond?
00:49:44Yes?
00:49:44My name is Murgatroy,
00:49:46and this is my business colleague,
00:49:47Mr. Sylvester Sneer.
00:49:49We are here on a very important mission.
00:49:53Well, won't you come in?
00:49:56Come, silly.
00:49:57I call him silly for short.
00:49:58Uh, sit down, gentlemen.
00:50:03You?
00:50:06Brrr.
00:50:10Nice, cozy little, uh, nest you have here, Miss Hammond.
00:50:15Well, it's comfortable.
00:50:16If you don't think so, you ought to sleep in an army tent.
00:50:20We slept in one last night.
00:50:22Quite an experience.
00:50:24We're inspecting Fort Merritt for the government.
00:50:27Dollar a year, men.
00:50:28You'd be surprised how little we can save out of that.
00:50:35Now, look, what's this all about, gentlemen?
00:50:38Well, it's all about, uh...
00:50:39It's all about Daniel Forrester.
00:50:43Uh, you know him, of course.
00:50:45Why, I certainly do.
00:50:46I think he's a wonderful boy.
00:50:48Ah, but as poor as a church mouse.
00:50:51And sick as a dog.
00:50:54I don't understand.
00:50:56Neither does he.
00:50:57Poor boy.
00:50:58He thinks he's wealthy.
00:51:00But, Miss Hammond, Daniel Forrester is bankrupt.
00:51:04Absolutely broke.
00:51:06Our firm has been financing him for years.
00:51:09But only because of his hopeless physical condition
00:51:11has his hopeless financial condition been kept a secret.
00:51:15Mr. Snare and myself have been carrying quite a burden.
00:51:18Believe me, my dear, it has cost us a king's ransom.
00:51:29But what has all this to do with me?
00:51:32Well, to take the bull with the horns,
00:51:35Daniel could never support you on his meager salary.
00:51:39And the takeout for laundry, too.
00:51:42We know.
00:51:43Daniel.
00:51:45My Daniel.
00:51:47Broke.
00:51:49Oh.
00:51:51Flatter than a sanded.
00:51:52Did he send you here?
00:51:58No.
00:51:59Daniel's too proud.
00:52:00Oh, the poor deluded, darling.
00:52:03I knew you would understand.
00:52:05Understand?
00:52:07Understand what?
00:52:08Why, that you'd give him up.
00:52:09Give up, Daniel?
00:52:10The only thing I have left?
00:52:12Are you mad?
00:52:13No, just practical.
00:52:15Oh, what have I done to deserve this?
00:52:18All my life I've hoped and prayed for a prince charming
00:52:22that would ride up on his white steed
00:52:24and sweep me into his heart
00:52:26and now to have it all vanish like a shattered dream.
00:52:30But you have your youth, your charm, your...
00:52:33You're beautiful.
00:52:34Give up this human derelict.
00:52:36No.
00:52:37Without Daniel, I'm nothing.
00:52:40A mere empty shell.
00:52:43All right, Miss Hammond.
00:52:45What is your price to release your prisoner?
00:52:48Now, don't forget, we're only dollar-a-year men.
00:52:52You offer me money?
00:52:55Come, come, my dear.
00:52:57Daniel is not such a bargain.
00:52:59Oh, please.
00:53:01Please, I...
00:53:02I'm confused.
00:53:04Miss Hammond, I am awaiting your answer.
00:53:11No.
00:53:12No, Mr., uh, uh...
00:53:15Uh, uh...
00:53:15Purgatory.
00:53:16Uh, Murgatroy.
00:53:17Murgatroy.
00:53:18All of your wealth isn't enough for me to make this sacrifice.
00:53:22See?
00:53:22I told you it was short.
00:53:23Started at a dollar and a half.
00:53:25Get out!
00:53:26Get out!
00:53:27But wait!
00:53:29Wait!
00:53:30You're taking the life of an innocent man!
00:53:32Get out!
00:53:33Get out, you, you, you, you charlatan, you!
00:53:47What's a charlatan?
00:53:48Get out!
00:53:50Boy, she's a tough customer.
00:53:54What are you moping about?
00:53:56She's so sweet!
00:54:02Come on.
00:54:03She's a woman to be reckoned with, all right.
00:54:07Personally, I...
00:54:08I thought she was very nice.
00:54:10Now, what do you know about women of the world?
00:54:13Hello, boys.
00:54:14Oh, hello, Daniel.
00:54:16Say, we got a surprise for you.
00:54:18Really?
00:54:19We're treating you to a movie tonight.
00:54:21Yeah, and you can stay up till 10 o'clock.
00:54:2312.30!
00:54:24It's a double feature.
00:54:25Yeah, and they're showing a Mickey duck.
00:54:29Thanks a lot, boys, but I have a date with Ginger.
00:54:34Daniel, you shouldn't go out with girls.
00:54:37It's dangerous.
00:54:39It might affect your heart.
00:54:41Oh, it has already.
00:54:42For the first time, it's starting to beat.
00:54:55What?
00:54:57Our last hope is in Sergeant Hippo.
00:54:59We'll ask his advice.
00:55:01He'll charge us for it.
00:55:02It's worth it.
00:55:03Come on.
00:55:03Where you going?
00:55:04I'm going over and see si...
00:55:05Come on, get up.
00:55:12Well, go!
00:55:19Come in!
00:55:22Stanley.
00:55:25Well, I thought you guys went out of town for the weekend.
00:55:34Oh, no, sir.
00:55:35We like it here.
00:55:37Sergeant, we need some advice.
00:55:39Well, that's what I'm here for.
00:55:40What's on your mind?
00:55:42Daniel's going to kill himself.
00:55:44Oh, is that all?
00:55:45He's infatuated with a woman.
00:55:47Oh, yeah?
00:55:49Who is it?
00:55:50Vanilla or lemon or something?
00:55:51Ginger.
00:55:51Oh, Ginger?
00:55:52Ginger, have it?
00:55:53Then you know her.
00:55:54You see, Stan?
00:55:55She's notorious.
00:55:56It'll mean the end of Daniel.
00:55:57I'll say it will.
00:55:58I knew you would understand.
00:56:00You better hurry before it's too late.
00:56:02Yeah.
00:56:02He's meeting her tonight,
00:56:03and maybe a nice heart-to-heart talk
00:56:05will convince him of his folly.
00:56:07That's a cinch.
00:56:10You know what, Ollie?
00:56:11What?
00:56:12Deep down in his heart,
00:56:13that Sergeant's a good kid.
00:56:15A prince among men.
00:56:17Come on, you yaks.
00:56:19Let's go.
00:56:19Let's go.
00:56:19Let's go.
00:56:20Let's go.
00:56:20Let's go.
00:56:21Let's go.
00:56:21Let's go.
00:56:22Let's go.
00:56:22Let's go.
00:56:23Let's go.
00:56:23Let's go.
00:56:24Let's go.
00:56:24Let's go.
00:56:25Let's go.
00:56:25Let's go.
00:56:26Let's go.
00:56:26Let's go.
00:56:27Let's go.
00:56:27Hello, Sergeant.
00:56:28Where do you think you're going?
00:56:30Into town.
00:56:31It's Saturday, you know.
00:56:32I suppose you think you're going to see Ginger tonight, huh?
00:56:34How'd you guess it?
00:56:35If you know what's good for you, you'll stay away with me.
00:56:39Sorry.
00:56:39She's expecting me tonight, and I wouldn't disappoint the lady.
00:56:42If you're smart, you will.
00:56:57Hello, Sergeant.
00:56:58Long time no see.
00:57:01Your friend is a pretty brave guy.
00:57:03All right, Sergeant.
00:57:05Have you anything more to say?
00:57:07Just that I warned you.
00:57:09I'll take the chance.
00:57:11Listen, Diamond, Jim.
00:57:12That's insubordination.
00:57:13I could be plenty tough on you.
00:57:14But I've got to be fair.
00:57:15All right, your furlough is over, wise guy.
00:57:17It's the guardhouse for you.
00:57:18Come on.
00:57:19Fellas.
00:57:20Come on.
00:57:21Haven't you anything to say?
00:57:22I ain't interested.
00:57:23Come on.
00:57:24Get going.
00:57:25You know what, Ollie?
00:57:26What?
00:57:27I feel like a mouse.
00:57:28We had to do it.
00:57:29It'd hype me more than a mouse.
00:57:30It'd hype me more than a mouse.
00:57:31It'd hype me more than a mouse.
00:57:32You know what, Ollie?
00:57:34Come on!
00:57:36Haven't you anything to say?
00:57:38I ain't interested. Come on, get going.
00:57:51You know what, Ollie?
00:57:52What?
00:57:54I feel like a mouse.
00:57:56We had to do it.
00:57:58It hurt me more than it did him.
00:58:01Poor Daniel!
00:58:04Well, there goes our trip, Chuck.
00:58:20Here's where we hit the saddle, but hard.
00:58:22I wonder what problems they're gonna give us.
00:58:24You got me.
00:58:26The military problem in this maneuver will include our entire fighting force.
00:58:31The original will be divided into two opposing combat units,
00:58:35the blue force and the white force.
00:58:38And the blue force, with a battalion of engineers attached,
00:58:42will attack the whites from an area somewhere along the 70 miles of river designated here.
00:58:48However, before they attack, they'll be required to construct a pontoon bridge,
00:58:54over which the entire brigade must pass before invading the area occupied by the whites.
00:58:59The problem of the white force is to detect the secret location of this bridgehead
00:59:04and destroy it before it's completed.
00:59:14Hey, Daniel!
00:59:15Come here!
00:59:18Hello, Daniel.
00:59:19We've come to say goodbye.
00:59:20Well, goodbye.
00:59:21Daniel, we're sorry for what happened, but we had to save you from yourself.
00:59:26Yeah, she was a real vampire.
00:59:28Oh, forget it.
00:59:29We're gonna play soldier.
00:59:31They put us in the white army.
00:59:33We're fighting the blue bloods.
00:59:35And we bet Sergeant Hippo $40 to his 20 that we win.
00:59:39He's giving us two to one.
00:59:42Yeah.
00:59:46Well, goodbye, Daniel.
00:59:47Remember your diet now.
00:59:48See you after the war.
00:59:50Goodbye.
00:59:51Goodbye.
00:59:52Goodbye, Daniel.
00:59:59B2 patrol?
01:00:00Yes, sir.
01:00:01Follow this terrain and don't slow down till you get to the river.
01:00:03Yes, sir.
01:00:09Is this section of the river being scouted, Captain?
01:00:26Yes, sir.
01:00:27It's just possible that Colonel Weyburn's blue army might pick that spot to build the bridge.
01:00:31I have a scouting party reconnoitering in that sector now, sir.
01:00:34Good.
01:00:39Good.
01:00:40Good.
01:00:41Good.
01:00:42Good.
01:00:43Good.
01:00:44Good.
01:00:45Good.
01:00:46Good.
01:00:47Good.
01:00:48Good.
01:00:49Good.
01:00:50Good.
01:00:51Good.
01:00:52Good.
01:00:53Good.
01:00:54Good.
01:00:55Good.
01:00:56Good.
01:00:57Good.
01:00:58Good.
01:00:59Good.
01:01:00Good.
01:01:01Good.
01:01:02Good.
01:01:03Good.
01:01:04Good.
01:01:05Good.
01:01:06Good.
01:01:07Good.
01:01:08Did you miss any of those things?
01:01:38Oh, yeah!
01:01:58Oh, yeah!
01:02:01Oh, yeah!
01:02:03Oh, yeah!
01:02:05Look at the minefields! Step on it!
01:02:28Fee patrol reporting from Sector 7. No contact is yet with enemy.
01:02:33Instruct them to proceed to Gila Point.
01:02:35Proceed to Gila Point.
01:02:36Yes, sir. Proceed to Gila Point.
01:02:39Wait for a scouting party. Well, what are you waiting for? Let them have it.
01:02:54Those blue boys couldn't hit this side of a barn.
01:02:57Oh, shit!
01:02:59Oh!
01:03:00You look like a biscuit.
01:03:03Ha, ha, ha!
01:03:04Those blue boys couldn't hit this side of a barn.
01:03:06Oh, shit!
01:03:07Oh!
01:03:08Ha!
01:03:09You look like a biscuit.
01:03:10Ha, ha, ha!
01:03:12Ha, ha, ha!
01:03:19Well, we found the river.
01:03:20How charming!
01:03:22Well, we found the river.
01:03:43How charming.
01:03:45Now, if we could only find the Blue Army Bridge,
01:03:48we'd get a medal just as short as...
01:03:50Hey, you. You white army men?
01:03:53Yes, sir. Patrol B-2.
01:03:56And who are you, may we ask?
01:03:58This is the Blue Army, and you're our prisoners.
01:04:01Pleased to meet.
01:04:03Oh.
01:04:05All right, come on. Pile out of there.
01:04:08What will we do?
01:04:09Lock the car so they can't use it.
01:04:16I'll put it in my mouth in case they search me.
01:04:19That's a good idea, Ollie.
01:04:22Oh.
01:04:24Come on, you fellows. Pile out of there.
01:04:33White army prisoners, sir. Patrol B-2.
01:04:35Confirmed. Report this to headquarters.
01:04:38Put these men to work on the bridge.
01:04:39Yes, sir.
01:04:40Well, that isn't exactly cricket, sir.
01:04:42All right, I'll have to double you guys. Come on.
01:04:44Goodbye.
01:04:45I'll have to do it, sir.
01:04:46I'll have to do it.
01:04:47I'll have to do it, sir.
01:04:48Reporting capture of your B-2 scouting party, sir.
01:04:52The stupid, blundering idiots.
01:04:54How does it feel to be a yard bird in a gilded cage, soldier?
01:05:01Thought you might be interested to know those two buddies of yours
01:05:04were just captured by the Blue Army.
01:05:06Just got it through the grapevine.
01:05:07So what?
01:05:08So the Blues cost the bridge, polish off the whites,
01:05:12and I'm 40 bucks a head.
01:05:13Just like that, huh?
01:05:15Yeah.
01:05:16Did you say that Stan and Oliver have been captured?
01:05:18You heard me.
01:05:19And if I know my maneuvers, they're helping those Blue engineers
01:05:22to build that bridge right now.
01:05:24They're what I call a couple of pigeons.
01:05:27But you haven't won yet.
01:05:28No?
01:05:29But I still got 50 that says the Blue Army win.
01:05:37I'll take that bet, sergeant.
01:05:39You're on, chump.
01:05:47Hey!
01:05:48Hey, where's that prisoner?
01:05:49Where's he?
01:05:49He's gone.
01:05:50Hey!
01:05:58Let's go.
01:06:25All right, guard.
01:06:26You take it through there.
01:06:27Come on, you follow me.
01:06:32Penelope, here's your chance to make good.
01:06:34Now go to Stan.
01:06:35Stan, he's here.
01:06:36He's got a nice fat worm for you.
01:06:45There he is!
01:06:50Hey!
01:06:57There he is!
01:07:28You'll get 20 years for this, you deserted!
01:07:46Hey!
01:07:47Don't work any harder than you have to for these blues.
01:07:49I won't.
01:07:57How's this?
01:08:03Perfect.
01:08:10The location of the Blue Army bridge is still undetermined, sir.
01:08:13If we don't find Webern's cusset breeze, the Blue Army will cross it, not flank us.
01:08:17But we haven't heard from B-5 yet, sir.
01:08:23Sorry to interrupt, sir, but I'm sure I can find the bridge.
01:08:25With what, a Ouija board?
01:08:26No, sir.
01:08:27By following that bird.
01:08:28That bird?
01:08:31You remember it, sir.
01:08:32It's my buddy's pet.
01:08:33They've been captured and she's heading for the bridge right now.
01:08:35Report back to your troop.
01:08:37Hold on there, soldier.
01:08:41It's a long chance,
01:08:43but we can't win standing around waiting to be outmaneuvered.
01:08:45Order the entire unit to follow this man.
01:08:47Yes, sir.
01:08:48Attention all troops.
01:08:55Ok, get up.
01:08:59You got powered by!
01:09:01Amen, sir.
01:09:03I'll shoot you the ground.
01:09:04Why'd you come?
01:09:05I'll shoot you the ground.
01:09:06I'll shoot you the ground.
01:09:07I'll shoot you the ground.
01:09:08I'll shoot you the ground.
01:09:09Let's go.
01:09:10You're almost there.
01:09:11This car is right.
01:09:12They're all flattered.
01:09:14Help! Help!
01:09:44The enemy's in this sector, heading this way, sir.
01:09:48What progress have we made on the bridge?
01:09:50Almost complete, sir.
01:09:51Deploy for counterattack.
01:09:52Deploy for counterattack.
01:09:53Command post four. Command post four.
01:09:55Deploy for counterattack.
01:10:14Dave later.
01:10:16capability.
01:10:17Deploy for counterattack.
01:10:19Dave later.
01:10:21Hold!
01:10:23Let's go.
01:10:26Just to buy condemn deSTEAD.
01:10:28You can fly back with your own Zuza.
01:10:30I won't go!
01:10:35The evangelist's rebel friend During the struggle hasn't taken so much.
01:10:39I'm gotta Π±Π°Π·ar him.
01:10:42Let's go.
01:11:12Let's go.
01:11:42Penelope, did you know that your Uncle Ollie and me have been captured?
01:11:47This is no place for pets. Get back to work.
01:11:53Holy hammer! It's a white force.
01:11:56That was the bridge, men. The white force wins.
01:12:00We won the war.
01:12:01Yeah, and our 40 bucks.
01:12:03Hooray!
01:12:05Woo!
01:12:07Oh, General, isn't it wonderful?
01:12:28Oh, there he is. There's Daniel.
01:12:31Where?
01:12:31Over there. See?
01:12:41The army.
01:12:42That's just what he needed.
01:12:44The army.
01:12:49The army.
01:12:50The army.
01:12:51The army.
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