- 5 hours ago
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00Transcribed by ESO, translated by —
00:30Are you going to get that?
00:48Holly?
00:51Holly?
00:52Holly?
00:56Excuse me?
00:58I told you to get the door when Lana and her boyfriend got here.
01:02Oh, that's today.
01:04We just talked about this.
01:07I wasn't listening.
01:09Go.
01:10Please, go.
01:12All right, all right.
01:12Please.
01:13Oh, my God.
01:28Hi.
01:29Look at you.
01:30How are you?
01:31Get in here.
01:32Hi.
01:32Good to see you.
01:33Good to see you.
01:34Hey, Tommy.
01:34Bart.
01:35Oh, man.
01:35Really excited to meet you.
01:36Yeah, I like him.
01:37Thanks for having us.
01:38Yeah.
01:38How was your flight?
01:39Great.
01:39Not bad.
01:40Good, good.
01:41Just, yeah.
01:41Oh, you know what?
01:41Leave all this here.
01:42Yeah, we'll get it sorted later.
01:44Yes, please.
01:45If you don't mind.
01:45Shula's household.
01:46Yeah.
01:46It's a beautiful house.
01:48What I've seen.
01:49Yeah, it gets worse from here.
01:51Come in.
01:53Oh, Bart.
01:54You a music guy?
01:55I'm a fan.
01:56Okay.
01:56Okay, yeah, great.
01:57Because I am going to need your girlfriend's ears on this new tune.
02:00But I can use yours as well.
02:03It's a beautiful view.
02:07So, this black Escalade keeps idling outside my place in the middle of the night every night.
02:13And Tommy's building at this point is, like, not nice.
02:15Like, it is repulsive.
02:17So, it's weird that an Escalade would be hanging out outside.
02:21And a woman in a hoodie sneaks from this fancy person car to the apartment next to mine.
02:26And finally, I'm like to my neighbor, what's up with the Escalade?
02:30You know?
02:31And he says, do you promise not to tell anyone?
02:33And I say, uh, sure.
02:35Okay, I promise.
02:36And he says, I'm fucking Lady Gaga.
02:39Whoa.
02:40Obviously, I'm like, okay, Marvin.
02:42This guy, by the way, is like a total schlub.
02:45Like, he's fucking disgusting.
02:46I mean, the whole thing's impossible.
02:48But also kind of weirdly specific to, like, makeup.
02:51Right, yeah.
02:52Yeah.
02:53So, next thing you know, I'm timing it out each night so that I'm by the window when she arrives.
02:58Okay?
02:58So I can get a better look.
02:59But casual, you know.
03:02You were so broke back then.
03:03Okay, yes.
03:06I've just moved to Los Angeles from Michigan.
03:08And I am struggling to get, like, day player, you know, assistant engineering work at that point.
03:15You know?
03:15Okay, yes, I can use any type of break.
03:18Anyways, in this particular part of the story, I'm just trying to figure out, is Marvin fucking with me, right?
03:25And why?
03:26So I'm asking him for details every time I see him.
03:30He doesn't really care if I believe him or not.
03:32Meanwhile, I'm getting zero visual confirmation.
03:35And then, like, all of a sudden.
03:37One day to the next.
03:38Right.
03:38The visits just stop.
03:39Poof.
03:40Poof.
03:40And Marvin, my neighbor, get this, says.
03:44Oh.
03:45He has met someone else.
03:47He's met someone else.
03:49Marvin?
03:49Yes.
03:50I, like, I can't believe it.
03:52Like, he dumps Gaga before I can ever fucking, you know, find out if he's with her in the first place.
03:56Tells me he's in love with some other woman.
03:59Wow.
04:00Yeah, it's ludicrous.
04:01Yeah, but wait, wait.
04:02That's not all.
04:05Next, he gives me this, like, soulful look, right?
04:08And he takes the palm of my hand, and he drops something in it.
04:13I look down.
04:15There's ten long, painted, fake fingernails.
04:19They're Gaga's nails.
04:20Gaga's nails.
04:22Or Gaga's nails.
04:24Question mark?
04:25Sure.
04:26Maybe.
04:26I don't know in any event.
04:29And this is where it gets a little bit mystical, I think.
04:32Before he goes inside, he looks back, and he says, I'm sorry it didn't work out.
04:38He says that to me.
04:39He actually apologizes to him.
04:41This is incredible.
04:42Oh, it's incredible.
04:43Fucking Marvin.
04:45Wait, so that's not how you met Lady Gaga?
04:47Isn't it crazy?
04:48It's actually totally unrelated.
04:51But you must have asked her since.
04:53No, why not?
04:54He doesn't want to know.
04:56You don't want to know?
04:58I don't want to know.
04:59We don't want to know.
05:00We don't want to know.
05:01We don't want to know.
05:01No.
05:02Mm-mm.
05:05You guys good?
05:06Do you want anything else?
05:07No, I think we're good.
05:09I think we're good, yeah.
05:10Wonderful.
05:10We'll see you tomorrow morning.
05:11All right.
05:11Good night.
05:11Bye.
05:14Come on.
05:16You want to hear something?
05:18Sure.
05:20I know Tommy.
05:22You know Tommy?
05:23From childhood.
05:24What?
05:25What's his last name?
05:26Sudland?
05:27Mm-hmm.
05:28Yeah.
05:28From fourth grade and fifth grade.
05:30Are you serious?
05:31Yeah, and we were, like, kind of close.
05:33We were, like, besties almost in fifth grade.
05:36Isn't that wild?
05:37That's wild.
05:37I know.
05:38I know.
05:39It took me a second to click because he's so different now.
05:42How so?
05:43I don't know.
05:43He's just, like, um, he was really skinny, remember?
05:47He was kind of, um, introverted.
05:50He didn't have a big beard.
05:52He just, um, I don't know.
05:54I just remember I was being, like, really tight for a second, and we kept moving around.
05:58So then it was, like, gone and out of my life.
06:00But I remember, like, I remember his mom very clearly.
06:02She was really sweet, kind of good-looking.
06:04And, uh, she, uh, she let him watch TV all the time.
06:08My mom let me watch TV never.
06:09So we were always at his house watching stuff, playing video games.
06:12We got really into forts.
06:14That was kind of our thing.
06:16Like, we would use, like, mattresses and couch pillows to make these elaborate forts.
06:19Um, and I remember that they smelled awful because everything was, everything was covered in piss.
06:25Because he, he peed himself constantly.
06:28So everything had this, like, like, deep, musty, old smell of urine in it.
06:35You know.
06:36Jeez.
06:38Such a strange memory.
06:40And I remember one time, my mom whacked me really hard in the back of the head.
06:45Like, she never hit me, ever.
06:48This was at my own house.
06:49Tommy wasn't there.
06:50But it was around that same time.
06:52And she just, like, lost it.
06:53And it was just, it just scared me shitless that my dad was there.
06:58And he didn't lift a finger.
06:59He just watched the whole thing quietly go down.
07:02It made me feel incredibly, like, abandoned.
07:05And the next day, the reason I bring it up is because the very next day I went to school
07:09and I told my entire class that Tommy's a bedwetter.
07:14I outed him, essentially.
07:20Wow.
07:20It was like my, I don't know, like my way of dealing with it or something, you know?
07:24Yeah.
07:26Hmm.
07:29Hmm?
07:33What's going on?
07:34I think it might be helpful for you to work through some of this family stuff.
07:38That's your response.
07:40I just told you a story about this weird shared chapter of my life with someone that we happen
07:44to be randomly staying with.
07:45And that's your response.
07:47I don't think that that's what your story was about.
07:52Lana, this is exhausting.
07:54This is fucking exhausting.
07:56It's exhausting.
07:57Well, I'm exhausted, too.
07:58Okay, good.
07:59I'm glad we're both exhausted.
08:00So let's stop.
08:00I'm exhausted because we can't, we can't have a conversation about something that we really
08:05need to have a conversation about.
08:06Are you fucking kidding me?
08:07Every, everything we talk about, literally the most random thing from the most distant past
08:12that we talk about, you just drag into this conversation.
08:15All we do is have this conversation.
08:16That is not true.
08:16That is not true.
08:17It is true.
08:17It is, look, look, it is true.
08:18We would like to have the conversation.
08:20Okay.
08:20I would like to have a good time with you sometimes.
08:23Remember when we used to just hang out and tell each other fun stories about our childhood?
08:28It's exhausting.
08:30I'm sorry I shared something with you.
08:32So that's it?
08:33You want to talk about it here?
08:35This is a problem, and it also inhibits us from having an actual conversation.
08:38That's not true.
08:38That is...
08:39She was, like, in her early 50s.
08:53Okay.
08:54You're saying this is, like, fifth grade?
08:56Fifth grade.
08:57Yeah, fifth grade.
08:57She was in her early 50s.
08:59She was short.
09:00She was a little heavyset.
09:01She had these big gold-rimmed glasses, kind of a high voice.
09:06Oh, Mrs. Szymanski?
09:09Szymanski.
09:10There it is.
09:12Yeah.
09:12She was one of my teachers.
09:15I mean, I believe you, but I just, I don't remember much from that far back.
09:19Yeah, I haven't thought about it in whatever, 30 years, but last night it all just hit me all at once.
09:24Man.
09:25It's amazing.
09:25Yeah.
09:26That's wild.
09:26Right?
09:27Yeah.
09:28Anyway, I'd love to hear the song.
09:30Yeah.
09:30Yeah, yeah, yeah.
09:30Let me, uh, let me play it for you.
09:33Um, actually, but before I do, the vocals are a scratch because I can never get her to just fucking come in and lay her part down.
09:40But the rest is pretty close, I think.
09:43So, here we go.
09:44Well, you said a thing, too much to bear, burning in shame, pit of despair.
09:58My darling dear, I'll hold you near and stroke your hair as we melt your fears.
10:13So, rest in my power, sleep in my arms tonight, in your darkest hour, rest in my power, rest in my light.
10:29Running from the pain, no one left to go, but you're a force of nature and I need you to know.
10:36So, rest in my power, rest in my power, rest in my power, but it's my goodness tonight.
10:50You want another secret to a great margarita?
10:53Yes, I do.
10:54Tequila.
10:56Lots and lots of tequila.
10:58He stole that from his sister.
10:59I did.
11:00I stole that lame joke from my sister, it's true.
11:05Birrium.
11:06Yeah, you were obsessed with her.
11:10Holy shit.
11:11You remember.
11:12You were only in our school for a couple years.
11:14Yeah, a year and a half.
11:15And your mom never let you watch television?
11:17Yes, we came to your house to watch TV, you remember.
11:20Oh my god, yes, farts.
11:24I was starting to think I was going crazy.
11:25We made forts and shit.
11:27Yeah, it was fucking forts.
11:28You peed everywhere.
11:34What?
11:34What do you mean I peed everywhere?
11:35You peed everywhere.
11:39I peed everywhere?
11:42I don't get it.
11:43What?
11:45Yeah, you peed everywhere.
11:46You were the bedwetter.
11:47I never knew you as the bedwetter.
11:48Are you fucking with me?
11:50I don't know.
11:50I don't remember that.
11:51You don't remember everyone in school spilling drinks in your lap in the cafeteria and cracking up?
11:58No, I don't.
12:01But I remember you wetting my bed a lot and my parents sort of being like, it's kind of funny.
12:09It's kind of annoying.
12:11Are you being serious right now?
12:14Yeah, but it's fine.
12:16I don't really care.
12:17I don't care either.
12:18It's just, I mean, I guess I do care because you're switching the whole story around for some reason.
12:24Whose story?
12:27Whose story?
12:28Yeah.
12:30You know what?
12:31Hey, if you remember me as the bedwetter, that's cool.
12:34I just, as long as I'm not still at it today, you know?
12:43Okay.
12:43Seems like you're doing a little better than okay.
12:49Yeah, I mean, I've been doing a ton of sessions, which has been great.
12:51But, I don't know, I'm starting to feel like 10 years older than anybody else, you know?
12:55It's a shitty racket.
12:57Oh, you know, I've got these kids coming in from Kansas in a couple weeks.
13:02Mm-hmm.
13:03Sisters.
13:03Right.
13:04Then EMI just signed them and sort of like country, but really pop dressed up as country.
13:09That's what country is now anyway.
13:10True.
13:12Anyways, maybe I can get you in.
13:13Yeah?
13:14Yeah, that'd be great.
13:15Yeah.
13:17You okay, Bart?
13:19Yeah.
13:19Just, uh, yeah.
13:22Okay.
13:23Well, I'll send you the demos and we'll go from there.
13:26Cool.
13:29You know, actually, there was something, um, uh, something you said in the kitchen kind of stuck with me a little bit.
13:36When you said, um, that you're okay with me remembering as the bedwetter.
13:43Mm-hmm.
13:44It seemed like you were trying to come across as the cool guy.
13:47Mm-hmm.
13:47Because who cares, right?
13:50But I care.
13:51It made me seem like the uncool guy.
13:54Mm.
13:56Yeah, I'm sorry.
13:57I guess I just don't really care who remembers what, though.
14:03Right, well, that's what I'm saying.
14:04You can't have it both ways, right?
14:06You can't muddy up a very clear narrative and then also say, I don't know.
14:12I don't know what happened.
14:13Who cares?
14:13I, I know what happened.
14:15Okay?
14:16I was there.
14:17I know the truth.
14:18I know it went down.
14:19Okay?
14:20Okay, well, what do you want?
14:21Exactly.
14:22Right?
14:22Because if Tommy says, I used to pee myself as a kid, you're going to say he's just trying
14:29to get out of a confrontation, right?
14:30Which you, you would be right.
14:32And if he says, no, man, you were the bedwetter, which is what he genuinely believes, right?
14:38Yes.
14:39Then you're going to keep shouting from the mountaintops the opposite?
14:42Maybe we drop it.
14:43Maybe you back me up.
14:45Hey.
14:46Whoa.
14:47Yes.
14:47Okay.
14:48Let's take a deep one.
14:51We'll change the tunes.
14:52Let's spark up a duty.
14:54Ah, shit.
14:55Oh, shit.
14:56I'm sorry.
14:58You think this is funny?
14:59No, I didn't mean to do that.
15:00Okay, I'd like to leave now.
15:02Honey, it's okay.
15:04It was an accident.
15:04It's okay?
15:05It's okay?
15:06Okay.
15:06You think it was an accident?
15:07Yes, I do.
15:08Can you please just take me down a little bit?
15:08Are you this desperate to get some work?
15:11Hmm?
15:12You have to team up with someone like this?
15:13Stop.
15:14Stop what?
15:15You're being pathetic.
15:17I thought you were better than this.
15:30What?
15:40What?
15:56Bart?
15:57You can go back inside.
16:01It's fine.
16:03Well, so can you.
16:07I remembered something else today.
16:37I didn't want to bring it up in front of everyone else.
16:45Let me ask you this.
16:49One time, you were at my house.
16:54And right before bed, you and me were doing something.
16:58I don't know what.
16:59And my mom got mad.
17:05She whacked the shit out of me.
17:09This was a thing that happened sometimes at my house.
17:13It wasn't, like, child protective services level.
17:16But maybe five times in my life, she lost her shit on me.
17:25And that was one of them.
17:26So afterwards, you and me were laying on our separate mattresses and can't sleep, shaking.
17:38I was really scared and destabilized.
17:43Do you remember this?
17:46And you got into my bed, and you patted my back, and you said, one day, when you're a grown-up, you'll get to decide who hits you.
18:04Did that happen?
18:14Did you say that to me?
18:34Did that happen the way?
18:59So,
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