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A League of Their Own (2010) Season 20 Episode 2
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Short filmTranscript
00:00The following programme contains strong language and adult humour.
00:11Very excited about tonight's show because one of our guests is,
00:14well, I guess you'd describe him as a bit of a bad boy,
00:17sort of quite outspoken.
00:18This is the moment for Paddy Pimble.
00:21Sort of a small, kind of dangerous package of a man.
00:24Very much an alpha male, I'd say.
00:26You're talking about me?
00:27Yeah. Yeah, Josh. Of course I'm talking about you.
00:51Hello, I'm Romance Dragonator.
00:53This is the League of the Road and it's fight night.
00:56Let's meet the teams.
00:57Joining Jill Scott and Micah Richards in the blue corner
00:59is a comedian who looks like Tyson Fury
01:01if he'd stopped boxing and done a BTEC in leisure and tourism.
01:04It's Tom Davis.
01:08And alongside Jamie Redknapp on the red team,
01:11it's the hardest man in podcasting,
01:13the Devon Destroyer.
01:15It's Josh Whittaker.
01:16And joining them tonight,
01:22he's a food-loving UFC star who loves smashing pizzas
01:26and people in the face.
01:28It's Paddy, the baddy, Pimble.
01:30CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
01:31Come on, lad.
01:45Come on, lad.
01:52Paddy, how are you, mate?
01:54How are you, Romance? You good?
01:55Yeah, very good, thank you.
01:56Thanks for coming on.
01:57Now, listen, obviously, you're a global star in UFC,
02:00one of the most brutal sports on the planet.
02:02So I want to start with the obvious question.
02:04What's the deal with the haircut?
02:05Like, what...
02:06What's the story?
02:08It was the fashion in Liverpool at the time, lad.
02:10We all grew out of it, you know what I mean?
02:12Everyone had a big massive hairdos
02:13and I just never grew out of it.
02:15Yeah, no, I mean, I like it.
02:16I love it. I think it's really good.
02:18LAUGHTER
02:18Rom, you've basically gone for the same haircut yourself.
02:22LAUGHTER
02:23Tom, you're a big fan of Paddy, aren't you?
02:26Massive, massive fan of Paddy. Love him.
02:28Good for the sport, big UFC fan.
02:30Thank you very much.
02:31Great to watch.
02:31How much would you love to have a head of hair like Paddy's?
02:34I'd just like to have hair.
02:36LAUGHTER
02:36Well, listen, Tom, we like to make dreams come true on this show,
02:40so I've got something for you.
02:42Um, want to give you the opportunity...
02:44LAUGHTER
02:45APPLAUSE
02:46Good luck to you.
02:50This is...
02:51This is actually an honour.
02:52LAUGHTER
02:53There we go, we're doing things for now.
02:56CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
02:57You look like you're half off Waynesville.
03:01LAUGHTER
03:02LAUGHTER
03:03I like it.
03:05You look like my first girlfriend.
03:08LAUGHTER
03:08Your first girlfriend ever been?
03:10Yeah.
03:10Really?
03:11I think I dated her as well.
03:14Uh, Paddy, so, can you just talk us through a little bit,
03:16but how is it you actually get a win in UFC?
03:19What are the ways that you can win a fight?
03:20Three different ways to win.
03:22Knock-out, or TKO.
03:24Yeah.
03:25Submission, so they either tap to the submission
03:27or you choke them unconscious.
03:28What?!
03:29LAUGHTER
03:30You choke them unconscious?
03:32Yeah, standard.
03:33What the fuck is this sport?
03:35LAUGHTER
03:36It's like, we're, like, modern-day gladiators, you could say.
03:39You know what modern-day gladiators is?
03:41Gladiators.
03:42LAUGHTER
03:43And obviously, decision is the other way.
03:46You can win by DQ as well, but no-one wants to win by that.
03:48Uh, so, I mean, obviously, I don't know if you got picked up,
03:51but Josh isn't entirely sure about the sport.
03:53Would you mind demonstrating a choke hold on?
03:54No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
03:56LAUGHTER
03:57Would you like to see Josh?
03:58CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
03:59Paddy, do you mind...?
04:01No, no, you can't tap out before him.
04:03Paddy, do you mind coming over?
04:04No, I'm tapping it out.
04:05Just show us, Paddy, what we'd have to do.
04:06We could show you properly and put you unconscious.
04:08Yeah, that'd be amazing.
04:09Well, let's not...
04:10Yeah!
04:11CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
04:13Yeah!
04:14And this, and actually, this could be your first ever fight
04:17against Paddy Pimlet.
04:18Well, one thought Paddy the baddie.
04:20And the joke could be on you, cos what if I win?
04:23LAUGHTER
04:24It's funny you say that, Josh, cos, Paddy, I don't want to upset you,
04:26but Josh actually sent me a voice note about it.
04:28No, I didn't.
04:29Oh, hey, Robash, this is Josh Widdicombe.
04:31You know Josh Widdicombe from Last Leg and Parenting Hell?
04:34I just thought on League of the World you've got Paddy Pimlet.
04:38Absolutely hate that prick.
04:41LAUGHTER
04:42That's not me!
04:43That is you!
04:44That's you.
04:45That's not me!
04:46Of course, that's you.
04:47I wouldn't say this is Josh Widdicombe to Romesh.
04:49Listen to this bit, this is pretty bad.
04:51Paddy the baddie, more like Paddy the pussy.
04:54LAUGHTER
04:56Oh, wow.
04:57I didn't think it was me, but it's as funny as me.
04:59LAUGHTER
05:01Who wants to see it?
05:02Yeah, let's see it, yeah.
05:03Yeah, yeah, yeah.
05:04Paddy, do you mind just like doing...
05:06What are we doing?
05:07Don't choke him out completely, but just...
05:08Oh, cheers, Rob!
05:09Just...
05:10Don't kill me!
05:11I won't proper squeeze it like we were in a fight.
05:13I'll just...
05:14Semi...
05:15Just like poppy's head like a pimple.
05:16Go on, let's...
05:17OK, come on, let's...
05:18So you're saying you're not going to kill me fast,
05:20you're going to kill me slowly?
05:21No, it's all right.
05:22You can just stay there.
05:23It's like I'm on your back.
05:24Can I take my glasses off?
05:25It's not going to make a difference, your glasses like...
05:27Do you want to be able to see properly as you lose consciousness?
05:31Is that...
05:32Is that right?
05:33One arm comes underneath.
05:34Oh, my God.
05:35Grab your own visor.
05:36What?
05:37This hand goes behind.
05:38Oh, get out!
05:39LAUGHTER
05:40But you've got to tap...
05:41But when someone's got you like Paddy, you've got to tap out, right?
05:54Oh, yeah, the first thing you do, right, isn't go,
05:56Are you all right?
05:57It's check the technique with Paddy.
05:59I almost just died!
06:01That genuinely was so much worse than I thought it was going to be.
06:05I could take that.
06:06That's not that bad.
06:07Honestly, they do.
06:08Nice try.
06:09Come on, it's not right!
06:10Come on, it's not right!
06:11Come on, Paddy!
06:12Come on, Paddy!
06:13Come on, Paddy!
06:14Just make sure you're tap, please.
06:15I don't want to put you to sleep.
06:16All right.
06:17Make sure you're tap.
06:18Sounds.
06:19Shall we have a look?
06:20Over, dear.
06:21Come on, Paddy!
06:22Come on, Paddy!
06:23Come on, Paddy!
06:25LAUGHTER
06:26Oh, my God!
06:27Oh, my God!
06:28Oh, my God!
06:29Minute!
06:30Oh, my God!
06:31How was that, mate?
06:32My windpipe's gone.
06:33Is it?
06:34Do you know what?
06:35My windpipe's gone.
06:36Is it?
06:37But do you know what?
06:38Well, for the record, only one of us tapped out.
06:40LAUGHTER
06:41Yes, you are.
06:44Uh...
06:45Yeah.
06:46Uh, OK, let's crackle with round one.
06:49This question is for you, blue team.
06:50Have a look at this.
06:51Rocking running, one ball!
06:52Oh!
06:53Oh!
06:54Oh!
06:55Oh!
06:56Oh!
06:58Oh, oh!
07:00Oh!
07:01Oh!
07:02Oh, looked.
07:03Oh!
07:04Oh!
07:05Oh!
07:06Oh!
07:07Oh!
07:08Oh!
07:09Oh!
07:10Oh!
07:11Oh!
07:12Oh!
07:13Oh!
07:14Oh!
07:17No!
07:27So, there you saw Canelo Alvarez, Molly Meeble McCann and Anthony Joshua.
07:32All great fighters, but I wanted to match them to their surprising food-related facts.
07:37Who used to work in an ice cream van?
07:39Who's so tight that they won't let their dinner dates order starters?
07:42And who celebrated a win by eating 50 McNuggets in bed?
07:46Jill, what are your first thoughts?
07:4850.
07:4950, yeah.
07:50That's light work. I'd go 100 nuggets I think I could eat.
07:53Now, Tom, you're looking incredible now, if you don't mind.
07:56Thank you. Thank you.
07:57Really good. Thank you.
07:58What was he looking like before?
07:59I'll tell you, 26 stone, baby.
08:01Bloody hell.
08:02How much you lost, Thomas?
08:04Well, when he was 26, he lost his wife.
08:06Oh, my God. My God.
08:18No, but listen, you genuinely are looking incredible.
08:20Thank you. Back in the day, though, I hope you don't mind me saying you were no stranger to a bit of a food binge.
08:24Oh, mate, yeah.
08:25So, what's the biggest you ever went?
08:26I used to be addicted. There was a, in Chinatown in London, there used to be an all-you-can-eat buffet.
08:31It was $4.99. You could go there and eat everything.
08:34$4.99?
08:35That must have been shite.
08:37It wasn't high-end catering.
08:40And I used to go there, I was working on the sites, $4.99, good place to go and eat all you can.
08:44And I used to fill up, man.
08:46Anyway, I'd asked this girl out for a date.
08:48I really liked her.
08:49That's the least believable bit of this story.
08:51I thought you would have come to $4.99, all-you-can-eat Chinese.
08:56Well, no, it's the only restaurant I knew in London.
08:58She said, do you know anywhere around here?
08:59I went, I've got just the place.
09:01So, we were outside queuing to get into this restaurant.
09:04And she went, is it nice?
09:05And I went, oh, yeah.
09:06It's all-you-can-eat.
09:07What, another queue?
09:09$4.99, all-you-can-eat had a queue.
09:11Yeah, it was a...
09:12Yeah, but to be fair, he's paying for her, so that's $9.98.
09:15Yeah.
09:16I'll give him a 10, I won't ask any change.
09:19And we get to the front of the queue, and the woman there,
09:22she looked at me with a real stare, and she went,
09:24you only go up once.
09:26And then she shouted to all of the waiters,
09:28he only goes up once.
09:30Do you know it's weird, Tom?
09:31When you tell me the story backstage, you did the accent.
09:33Yes.
09:36I figure I'm tickling around being cancelled.
09:38He thought about it, didn't he?
09:40I'm not going to lie, I was very, very close.
09:43And I could see Josh willing me to do it.
09:45Do you know what?
09:46Didn't you go to Caribbean restaurants?
09:48LAUGHTER
09:50It'd be some start to the show with it two dead,
09:52and he's just been cancelled.
09:54LAUGHTER
09:56So what about Molly McCann?
09:58Paddy, you're close with Molly, obviously.
10:00How did she get the nickname The Meatball?
10:02Yeah, she used to work in Subway, didn't she?
10:04Like, she used to...
10:05She did.
10:06LAUGHTER
10:07She used to do a night shift in Subway, lad,
10:10and then come in the gym the next morning,
10:12and you could smell the remnants of meatballs on her.
10:15LAUGHTER
10:16Yeah.
10:17We thought Tom worked at Subway for a while,
10:18but it was just his...
10:19LAUGHTER
10:20It was just his natural musk.
10:21LAUGHTER
10:22We've actually got a picture of Molly working in Subway.
10:24There she is.
10:25LAUGHTER
10:26No, she actually has done that before, like, no shit.
10:29Yeah, yeah.
10:30She used to dress up as Subman,
10:31which coincidentally was Mix's nickname at Man City.
10:33LAUGHTER
10:35Wow!
10:36Wow!
10:37Wow!
10:38Wow!
10:39Wow!
10:40Whoa!
10:41LAUGHTER
10:42That's actually fucking...
10:44Look, he's happy with himself.
10:46Laughing at his own jokes.
10:47What a twat.
10:48LAUGHTER
10:50Now, Paddy, your love of food
10:52has actually earned your reputation for your extreme cuts
10:55to get down to fighting weight.
10:56Let's have a look at this transformation.
10:58Um...
10:59Ah, yes, Paddy!
11:00Incredible.
11:01I would argue your wife has had a bigger transformation.
11:03LAUGHTER
11:04APPLAUSE
11:06Um...
11:09Now, lads...
11:11Have you got something in your pocket,
11:13or are you just really excited to be that way?
11:16LAUGHTER
11:17On the...
11:18Oh, dear, on that one!
11:19Yeah, yeah.
11:20That had...
11:21That had a lot of comments on it about that, to be fair.
11:23Oh, I didn't.
11:24But don't worry, it's not that big.
11:25LAUGHTER
11:26I want some love of you.
11:27LAUGHTER
11:28Uh...
11:29What do you eat just before a fight?
11:30Do you eat just right up to your fight,
11:31or how do you treat the fight?
11:32Yeah, even the last fight,
11:33I was sitting in the back eating, erm...
11:35some jellies.
11:36Just eating a little bit of...
11:37Just to keep you going.
11:38Little bits of cards.
11:39Right, right, right.
11:40Um, Josh, what do you do to prepare for a big gig?
11:42LAUGHTER
11:43I don't know why that was a funny question!
11:47LAUGHTER
11:48Um...
11:49So, I, when I'm on tour,
11:51I take my own duvet and pillow.
11:54LAUGHTER
11:55Yeah, I...
11:56Cos I've got a bad neck, I have to take...
11:58Particularly now.
11:59I have to take my own pillow around with me.
12:01Yeah.
12:02And it's got its own plastic carry case with a handle.
12:04Yeah.
12:05Wow.
12:06He really is a tragic bastard.
12:07We've actually...
12:08We've actually got a picture of your pre-gig set-up.
12:10Have a look at this.
12:11LAUGHTER
12:13Well, it's the mattress yours as well.
12:15That's an inflatable mattress.
12:16Yeah.
12:17You'd take that as well?
12:18Yeah, they don't provide that.
12:19I'm not made of money.
12:20Yeah.
12:21Gives you an idea of the level that Josh is touring at.
12:22Look at that room.
12:23It looks like he just had to get up and do a video,
12:25and go,
12:26Please tell my children I'm OK.
12:28LAUGHTER
12:29If you could just meet the demands,
12:31they will release me.
12:32Do you know what?
12:33He's quite showbiz,
12:34because I didn't inflate the mattress myself.
12:36I got my tour manager to do it.
12:37Oh, wow.
12:38And when I came...
12:39Is that a kid's bed?
12:40No, it's a...
12:41LAUGHTER
12:42No, it's a lilo.
12:44Look, you can see I've put the bottle of water next to it
12:47for scale.
12:48LAUGHTER
12:49When I came in...
12:50Is that a bluey duvet?
12:51What?
12:52Is that a bluey duvet?
12:53What is the pattern on that duvet?
12:54Is that a bluey duvet?
12:55No, it's not a bluey duvet.
12:57Looks like flowers.
12:58It does, it really does.
12:59What's the deal?
13:00What's the deal?
13:01I just bought a cheap duvet.
13:03Sorry, your issue is that I haven't got a cool enough duvet cover.
13:06I told you.
13:07I don't think if you're going to show off about having a bed in your dress...
13:09I'm not showing off!
13:10He brought up the picture!
13:11You clearly sent that around the group.
13:14I don't want a group!
13:15I'm not in any group!
13:18The group is...
13:19There is a group.
13:20It's called Tragic Virgins.
13:21LAUGHTER
13:26I'm going to go for a double,
13:28but then I thought...
13:29What's the point?
13:30I'm Josh!
13:31LAUGHTER
13:32Well, it's quite presumptuous to get to a gig and then start pumping up a double bed.
13:37LAUGHTER
13:38Just want to see what might happen before the gig.
13:40LAUGHTER
13:41Tom, you had any food-related jobs?
13:43Yeah, actually, I was a kitchen porter for a little while.
13:45What?
13:46Yeah, I was a kitchen porter, like, pot wash.
13:47What was that?
13:48Like, washing up and shit.
13:49In, like, quite a high...
13:51A place called De Connort in London.
13:52Oh, that is nice.
13:53Oh, that is nice.
13:54And I'll tell you something that was great, is, at the end of the day,
13:57you'd be the last person there, so you'd be able to steal, like,
13:59some of the fish and the meat and sell it down the pub.
14:01LAUGHTER
14:02And, er, I got caught one day, stealing,
14:05and the head chef beat me with a lobster.
14:08LAUGHTER
14:09He was French.
14:10He went,
14:11You disgust me!
14:12You thief!
14:13And he'd start whipping me with a lobster.
14:15And then, er, what did the Chinese person work in there for?
14:18LAUGHTER
14:19APPLAUSE
14:25Er, OK, Blue Team, I need an answer from you.
14:28Who used to work in an ice cream van?
14:30Who's so tired that they won't let their dinner dates order starters?
14:33And who celebrated a title win by eating 50 McNuggets in bed?
14:37Oh, man.
14:38I think Canelo worked in an ice cream van.
14:40Almost be definite, he worked in an ice cream van.
14:42By the way, Molly's an absolute saint.
14:43Molly, Molly's letting you have a start all the day.
14:45Yeah, I think she'd let you have a start and me and dessert.
14:47Um, that's what I'm saying.
14:48Do you want to issue?
14:49OK.
14:50I can tell you that Canelo Alvarez used to work in an ice cream van.
14:53Molly McCann celebrated a title win by 50 McNuggets,
14:56and Anthony Joshua won't let dinner dates order.
14:58Yeah!
14:59CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
15:00CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
15:01Yes!
15:02Well done, Blue Team, you scored three points.
15:03APPLAUSE
15:04Thanks, Jamie!
15:05APPLAUSE
15:06Thanks, Jamie!
15:07APPLAUSE
15:16Paddy, talking of food, you broke a record at one of your favourite restaurants,
15:19didn't you?
15:20Yeah.
15:21Chicken Wing Challenge, Wing Wednesday.
15:22Wow.
15:23Wing Wednesday.
15:24And how many did you get through?
15:2546, I think it was.
15:26Wow!
15:27That's 23 chickens that can't even wave at their mates anymore.
15:30LAUGHTER
15:31Meeks, er, you're also a big fan of a chicken wing, aren't you?
15:35What makes you say that?
15:37I know what you're getting at.
15:38It's not what you think, it's because you're black.
15:40LAUGHTER
15:41LAUGHTER
15:42LAUGHTER
15:48Well, listen, Paddy and Micah's chicken wing love gave me an idea for a game.
15:52Both teams are up for this, go and get ready.
15:54This is Wing of Fire.
15:56FIREBALL!
16:03Come on, Fireball!
16:05I wanted to see who the true king of the wing is, Paddy or Micah.
16:08To settle it, we're doing a good old-fashioned eating contest.
16:11Whoever eats the most spicy chicken wings will bag their team a massive bonus point.
16:15Let's welcome back our competitors.
16:17From Leeds, it's the plucky underdog, Micah Richards.
16:20And from Liverpool, it's the reigning champion, Paddy the Baddy!
16:23CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
16:25All right, take a seat, guys, get your bibs on.
16:40We've got some gloves for you as well.
16:42Cos that'll be a nightmare when you take a piss later if you don't put some gloves on.
16:45LAUGHTER
16:46Now, if that, if you wear gloves, I'm gonna give you some stick, you know?
16:50Oh, oh, oh! Say something cool back! Say something cool back!
16:53Say something cool back!
16:54I'm gonna wear gloves.
16:55Micah, come on.
16:56Micah, come on.
16:57It's a very girly thing to do.
17:00Whoa, whoa, whoa!
17:01Oi!
17:02Just a look at your head!
17:03LAUGHTER
17:05Tom will probably just hold your penis later anyway if you need a wig.
17:09LAUGHTER
17:10Well, you know what?
17:11As a cut man, I'm there for you.
17:12If you need me to hold your penis later, I'm there for you.
17:14OK.
17:15OK.
17:16You've each got plates of the spiciest wings our health and safety department would let us use.
17:20Can you please take the cloches off?
17:22Please?
17:23Yeah.
17:24OK, so there's your wings.
17:25Just to let you know, they are vegan.
17:27Oh!
17:28Oh, man!
17:29Swear me.
17:30Leave it.
17:31Please, please.
17:32It's not a chicken.
17:33I'm not doing vegan wings.
17:34They're vegan wings.
17:36What are they made out of?
17:37You can't call it a chicken wing if it's not a chicken.
17:39It's a...
17:40It's a...
17:41Chicken.
17:42Chicken.
17:43Listen, let me take care of it.
17:44Yeah, please.
17:45Listen, we're getting big, big money for this.
17:46You've got to eat them.
17:47I'm highly disappointed.
17:48The belt is on the line.
17:49You can't let him beat you.
17:50OK.
17:51Do you want to do it?
17:52Romance, you're like a dick title on the show, aren't you?
17:53No.
17:54Just a dick.
17:55Don't.
17:56Making us have vegan wings.
17:57But listen, they are very spicy.
17:58They are made of jackfruit.
17:59You're a fan of jackfruit, Paddy?
18:00Oh, what the fuck's jackfruit?
18:01I'm vegetarian and even I think that's lame.
18:02Shut up, John.
18:03Shut up.
18:04Don't applaud him.
18:05Don't applaud him.
18:06You're a fan of jackfruit.
18:07And this is oat milk, isn't it?
18:08It is oat milk.
18:09Is this really oat milk?
18:10It's not oat milk.
18:11It is oat milk.
18:12So I tried it, I was like, what the fuck's wrong with that milk?
18:14And now it's all fallen into place.
18:15Romance has got too much power.
18:16How are you with spice, Mix?
18:17They're quite spicy, these wings.
18:18No, I'm good and army with spice.
18:19OK.
18:20Don't like the spice, boys.
18:21But yeah, I'm good.
18:22Oh, ho, ho, ho.
18:23These are my new trousers.
18:24Yes, you know what?
18:25Ah...
18:26And now it's all fallen into place.
18:27Vomance has got too much power.
18:28Wowo, ho, ho, ho.
18:29Next!
18:30How are you with spice, Mix?
18:31They're quite spicy, these wings.
18:32No, I'm good, normally with spice.
18:33OK.
18:34Don't like the spice, boys.
18:35But yeah, I'm good.
18:36Oh, ho, zing.
18:37Nice, fella.
18:38OK.
18:39Whoever eats the most wings gets the bonus point.
18:42Oh, ho, ho.
18:43What the hell?
18:44Oh, these are my new trousers?
18:46What the hell?
18:48Oh, these are my new Charleses.
18:50You know what, in my head, that was going to hit Ramesh and it's backfired.
18:54Normally you only see scenes like that on Josh's Lilo in the dressing room.
19:03Okay, whoever eats the most foods gets a bonus point.
19:05We'll stop for a milk break, and it is oat milk.
19:07It's round one, off you go.
19:09Go, I've got my wife.
19:11What the hell? Come on, Mater.
19:13One, get right into the world.
19:15Yes.
19:17Come on, champ.
19:18Come on, champ.
19:19That's one from Paddy.
19:20Go on, Paddy.
19:21Come on, Paddy.
19:22That's two from Mitch.
19:24Come on, Mitch.
19:25Go on, Paddy.
19:26Wow, they had to drive.
19:28They had to drive.
19:29Wow.
19:30Care to the eye.
19:32Care to the eye.
19:33Go on, champ.
19:34Come on, champ.
19:36Come on, champ.
19:38Okay, that is...
19:40That is it.
19:41You're fucking disgusting.
19:43Oh, no.
19:44He spat it out.
19:45Oh, my God.
19:46He spat it out.
19:47I don't have a punch and eat any more of them.
19:50No, no, no.
19:51Stop talking.
19:52Oh, my God.
19:53How the fuck are you vegan, lad?
19:54Hot milk.
19:55Stop talking.
19:56Oh, my God.
19:57Oh, my God.
19:58How the fuck are you vegan, lad?
20:01He's gone.
20:06He's gone.
20:07He's going to tap out.
20:08He's going to tap.
20:09He's tapping.
20:10Oh, no.
20:11He's all right.
20:12He's good.
20:13He's gone.
20:14Your man is gone.
20:15He's good.
20:16He's good.
20:17He's fine.
20:18You're all right.
20:19Can I just let you behind the scenes a little bit? We talked about how spicy you wanted the wings to be and
20:24Meek said I'm Caribbean make it as hot as you like and now
20:29You look like you're about to shit a kidney
20:38Now he's gone he's out he looks like he's melting
20:43That is fucking unreal
20:45I mean you're all right. Oh, I have a child
20:52Shit
20:57You're right, I think I've shipped me so
21:09Oh my god, oh
21:13Give me the big
21:15Oh
21:17I mean, but hey listen worry about your man. I've had a heart attack
21:23He's alright. I just can't believe I got wet around six guys
21:32Let's go again. I'm ready back. He's back back. What a comeback
21:36Oh my god
21:46Let's do it. Will you see me any advice for Meeks?
21:49Just go for it. Look this is your rocky moment. You're down a round but you can take this back and you can win
21:54But I believe he's winning
21:56He's winning your belly
22:02Oh, okay, carry the wire
22:04Red team any motivational words for Paddy? He took a bit of a hit
22:07But he's coming back
22:08Any motivational words?
22:09He's coming back
22:10This round
22:11This is your round champ
22:12Try and pretend this chicken even though it tastes not unlikely
22:13Okay
22:14It's time for round two. Good luck
22:15Come on Paddy
22:17Come on Paddy
22:17Come on Paddy
22:19Come on Paddy
22:20Come on Paddy
22:22Come on my Yep
22:25Light work baby
22:26Light work
22:26Oh
22:41Okay, I can declare that quite unanimous decision with an unbelievable four wings the winner is Michael
22:56So at the end of that round the blue table in the lay
23:18This question is for you red team have a look at this
23:26But it stopped beautifully by tomato silver is a glorious goal
23:34Spaces by Alexander-Arnold
23:36He's made the most of it
23:46He is the main man for Manchester United
23:49So there you saw Trent Alexander-Arnold, Vino Fernandes and Bernardo Silva
23:55All three are tough competitors, but I want to know about their softer sides
23:59Who bonded with a teammate over a Harry Potter movie marathon?
24:03Who kept his Christmas tree up all year for good luck?
24:05And whose childhood nickname was Little Onion?
24:08I was actually nicknamed after food as well
24:10At least I think that's why they were calling me a chocolate brownie curry face
24:22Paddy, do you have a softer side?
24:24Yeah, I have a much softer side
24:26Yeah? What sort of stuff makes you sort of sad?
24:29What makes you emotional?
24:30I cry watching films and all stuff like that lad
24:32Yeah?
24:33Like watch The Lion King with the babies last week lad
24:35When Mufasa dies lad
24:37If you don't shed a tear
24:38You're a cold-hearted man
24:39Oh
24:41I'm with you baby
24:42Cheers for spoiling it mate
24:43I was watching it next week
24:48I think you're a bit of a softy
24:49I can see you've got a soft side
24:50Sometimes I cry when adverts come on lad
24:52If they're emotional ones
24:54I cry adverts
24:55There's a really sad one with like the old man
24:58And he's all dodgery
24:59And then he goes
25:00Air-cooled memory foam
25:12Josh, what was the last thing that made you cry?
25:14Last time I saw you got a new TV show
25:16That hit me quite hard
25:19I'd get used to that mate
25:22I have mate
25:23I fucking have
25:24You're going to be sobbing quite a lot
25:28It's so annoying when someone's getting more from the crowd doing your voice
25:38Paddy, we've actually got a clip of you showing off your softer side
25:41Hello, look
25:42Me dog's just had like a sloppy outside
25:45I was just wondering if he left some water
25:47I don't want to leave it outside
25:48Is that Paddy the bathroom?
25:50It is
25:51I'm like five minutes away from home
25:53Don't worry, I'll clean it
25:55You sure?
25:56I just, I feel, I feel terrible
25:59Know what I mean?
26:00No, sure
26:01I just
26:02Just add the proper stuff
26:03Listen, I can't even kick it over the poo bag
26:05Know what I mean?
26:06Don't worry, I'll clean it when I get in
26:08Sir, thank you very much once again
26:11I'm sorry about that
26:12I'm sorry about that
26:17Can I say, Paddy, word of advice
26:20Always carry a straw
26:21Just in case that
26:26Paddy, that was actually really sweet of you
26:27That is so sweet
26:28That's really not
26:29I feel like welling up listening to that
26:32I just want to ask one quick question
26:33Are you okay, Mix?
26:34I feel like that dog
26:39You look concussed
26:41I might have to go for his shit
26:47Josh, how would you have reacted if Paddy had rung your doorbell in the middle of the night?
26:51Beating the shit out of him
26:54Choke hold?
26:55Choke hold, yeah
26:56Now, Paddy, you named Bruno Fernandes as the player you'd most like to fight
27:01Yes!
27:04What is your problem with Bruno?
27:07First and foremost, he plays for Man United
27:09Right
27:10And he just looks like a rat
27:14Looks like a rat for Chewie, you've seen the cartoon
27:17Well, let's see what he's got to say for himself
27:20Please give it up for Bruno Fernandes
27:27Apparently, Paddy, Bruno's such a nice guy
27:29What Christmas presents for all the club staff at Man United?
27:31Does that change your mind about that?
27:32No, Eddie goes up in my estimation for that
27:34Like, but if United got any staff left, then they all get sacked
27:43Talking of Christmas, Josh
27:44Tell me, is this guy a fan of Santa?
27:49Oh, Josh, I love you so much
27:50This is you on the Christmas Strictly
27:52That was me on the Christmas Strictly
27:53I'm going to take a wild guess
27:56And say that you managed to avoid the Strictly curse
27:59LAUGHTER
28:12Paddy, do you think, could you see yourself ever doing Strictly in the future?
28:15No, wouldn't
28:17No, I'd do it
28:18But I wouldn't be allowed
28:19My wife would stab me
28:21Why?
28:22She's already told me
28:23There's no way you are ever doing Strictly
28:25Josh, is there a feeling, like, of, like, flirting and sort of
28:28Was your missus all right with it? Like, genuinely?
28:30What, when I was doing the Charleston dress like that?
28:31What, have you got a missus?
28:32Have you got a missus?
28:38Have you?
28:39Yeah
28:41Why have you got a single inflatable bed, Denny?
28:43Is both that small?
28:44LAUGHTER
28:47Now, Paddy, it's fair to say you're not a fan of any of these players, are you?
28:51What about Trent, Paddy?
28:53You don't like him?
28:54I mean, surely...
28:55Please, please
28:56Don't stop
28:57What are you going to say?
28:58You're going to say something to wind up here, aren't you?
29:00No, I'm not
29:01I'm not
29:02You can't blame him for wanting to move to a bigger club
29:04That's all I'm saying
29:06I thought you were going to say something worse than that
29:08Yeah
29:09Now everyone knows how I feel about Trent, lad
29:11You know what I mean?
29:12He betrayed his boyhood club
29:13Who'd done everything for him
29:14Made his life what it is today
29:16And he's went to Real Madrid
29:17Thinking he's going to be the next David Beckham
29:19And now he's warming the bench up for Caravajal
29:21Poetic justice at its finest
29:27Jamie, we're talking about people that Paddy hates
29:30Yeah
29:31But you're such a lovable, nice guy
29:32I can't imagine you hating anyone
29:33I don't hate many people
29:34I don't hate anyone
29:35You know?
29:36No, genuinely, no, I'm good
29:37I don't know
29:38People might get on my nerves
29:39Mm
29:40But Paddy's opinions like are not expressed by everybody on Sky Sports
29:43Stop being so nice, Jamie
29:45Just be honest
29:46You don't be like
29:47I'm honestly Paddy, right?
29:49I'm good
29:50I'm good with everyone
29:51You're lying?
29:52You're lying
29:53You're lying
29:54David Beckham
29:55What?
29:56You had the rivalry
29:57What?
29:58You had the rivalry
29:59When he was younger
30:00You know, Liverpool won the United
30:01Yeah, but that was a long time ago
30:03Who was better looking?
30:05Who had the better misses?
30:07Wow!
30:09Who was a better footballer?
30:11Who won stuff?
30:12And he had a knighthood?
30:13Yeah
30:14Yeah, so was Jimmy Savile
30:15Whoa!
30:16Whoa!
30:17Whoa!
30:18Whoa!
30:19Whoa!
30:20Whoa!
30:21Whoa!
30:22Whoa!
30:23Whoa!
30:24Whoa!
30:25Wow!
30:26Listen, right
30:27I'm not begging
30:28I wouldn't want a knighthood if you gave it to me
30:30Oh, come on, mate
30:31You'd be sniffing around if you could get one
30:32What do you want a knighthood?
30:33What are your accolades?
30:34Come on
30:35What have you got?
30:36I've got the double
30:37What's a double?
30:38Haircut of the year
30:39And rear of the year
30:41Seriously
30:42That's a double
30:44That's some of that
30:45Smash hits haircut of the year, by the way
30:47Smash hits
30:48Yeah
30:49For the people that know
30:50What year was that?
30:521997
30:53Peak years
30:54That would have been 1975
30:5576
30:56Listen, you'd love haircut of the year, you prick
31:05OK, we need an answer, please
31:07Who bonded with a teammate over Harry Potter?
31:09Who kept his Christmas tree up all year for luck?
31:11And whose childhood nickname was Little Onion?
31:13Little Onion is going to be...
31:14Yeah, it's got to be Bernard or Silver
31:16I'm going with you, OK
31:18They're both younger
31:19So I'm guessing that they would be the Harry Potter one
31:21Sense
31:22Because he's younger than the other two, isn't he?
31:23Yeah
31:24Well, I can't tell you that Trent Alexander-Arnold
31:26Bonded with Aaron Ramsdell over Harry Potter movie marathons
31:28Bruno Fernandes' nickname is Little Onion
31:30And Bernard or Silver kept his Christmas tree up all year round for luck
31:33Well done, red team
31:34You've scored one point
31:35APPLAUSE
31:36Now, Paddy, you're obviously one of the hardest people in the country
31:45But based on looks alone, which team do you think is the hardest?
31:49I'm not going to lie, I think Meeks and Tom would smash the paleo resin
31:53What about you?
31:55I think Jill would take Josh all day
31:57And probably Josh
31:58By the way, her leg's been doing this since...
32:01I'm just getting ready
32:02Yeah
32:03Take your breath
32:04It's a weird decision, Tom
32:05To demonstrate what Jill's leg's been doing under the table
32:07By demonstrating that also under the table
32:10LAUGHTER
32:12LAUGHTER
32:13LAUGHTER
32:14LAUGHTER
32:15LAUGHTER
32:16You are lovely
32:17You're a bit under the table
32:18OK, well, we are going to find out who's the toughest team in this next game
32:22Because this is You've Got The Power
32:24We're about to find out which team is the hardest players from each team will take it in turns
32:35To unleash hell on our human punch bag
32:38Which is me
32:39Unfortunately, I'm the only person not on a team
32:41So I can be impartial
32:42But I've been assured that I'm thoroughly padded so it won't hurt
32:45Could you please raise me up?
32:47LAUGHTER
32:49LAUGHTER
32:53OK, I'm up now
32:54All right, Paddy
32:55Would you like to do a quick test but take it easy?
32:57Oh, head Paddy, lads
32:58Is that all he's been lifted?
32:59Just a little tester
33:00Oh, fuck
33:01That doesn't hurt, that
33:02They've seen how much padding you've got?
33:04Yeah, I'll show you how I'll kick it
33:05No, no, no!
33:06Oh!
33:11You just smashed my own hands into my testicles
33:14LAUGHTER
33:16OK, we're going to have three match-ups
33:18Players from each team will take it in turns to punch me
33:20Is this real?
33:21LAUGHTER
33:22Whoever hits me the hardest will get a point for their team
33:24OK, let's play
33:25First up, it's Josh and Jill
33:26You can take the padding off for this one
33:28LAUGHTER
33:30Oh, wow!
33:31So, Josh, you're going to go on the first bell
33:34And then, Jill, you'll go on the second bell
33:36At which point, Josh, you stop
33:38So it's one at a time for five seconds
33:40How long have I got? Oh, five seconds, I can do that
33:42Josh, you've got about for as long as you last on the lilo usually
33:44LAUGHTER
33:45One bell, two bell, bellend
33:49LAUGHTER
33:50I've got it!
33:51OK
33:52Good luck
33:53You start on the first bell, off we go
33:58Oh, my God!
34:08I lost that
34:10Oh, shit!
34:12You nearly hit my face! You nearly hit my face!
34:16Jill, fuck off! The bell's... Fuck off, Jill!
34:21I'm gonna be honest with you Jill was so much stronger than Josh but because
34:41Jill tried to punch me in the face and then award the point to Josh
34:51Next stop, it's Jamie vs. Meeks. Come on, baby!
34:58And Micah tensers up and throws on, he's gonna follow through.
35:04Okay, let's do it. Jamie, go on the first whistle, Meeks on the second. Good luck to you.
35:08Come on, Jamie! Come on, Micah! Come on, Micah! Come on, Micah!
35:16It hurts so much! Does it really? I feel bad now. That was pretty clear-cut. The point goes to the blue team. Well done, Micah!
35:35Oh, fuck off! I'll fucking lose him everywhere!
35:42Okay, so fortunately, the hard bit's over. We've just got Paddy and Tom to go.
35:46Come on, Tom! Come on, Paddy, lads! Come on, Tom!
35:49Paddy, you're gonna go on the second whistle. So we're going one-two off, Paddy shit.
35:52No body kick, Paddy. Paddy, I'm begging you, bro. Don't do...
35:58Paddy, think about those points. You made me smash my own dick and testicles.
36:02Listen, I swear, you win the show. And the... And the red team win!
36:08They win the whole show! In fact, the red team... The red team win the series! They win the whole series!
36:15Give it up for Paddy! All the... 100 points to Paddy!
36:19Oh, God. Okay, raise me up, please. So I'm first.
36:23Yeah, you're first. Good luck on the bell.
36:27God!
36:29Yeah!
36:30Oh, fucking hell!
36:35Jesus fucking, are you mental?
36:37Are you fucking mental?
36:39Mate, we're not outside a hotel. Are you porn?
36:44Jesus Christ, why'd you come from painting a fucking roundabout to kick the shit out of an ethnic minority?
36:50What? Jesus Christ! We're going to put that up, I'm going to put the caption EDL in action.
37:00Let me tell you something, if there was another series, I'd quit. Get James Corden back, you pieces of shit!
37:11I just think I haven't had my go, yeah.
37:15Okay, Paddy, you're going to be ready. Five seconds, okay off we go.
37:19Go on, Paddy.
37:21Oh, oh, oh, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!
37:26Oh, God! Oh, God! Oh, God!
37:30Wow! Nice one, Pete!
37:34Do you want me to do this bit for your mum? I actually don't really want to win this now, if I'm on this video.
37:39Believe me, you haven't.
37:42The points go to Paddy and the red team, well done.
37:46Oh, God!
37:47Oh, God!
37:48Oh, God!
37:49Okay, so at the end of that round, the blue team are in the lead.
37:51It's time for our final round. Let's see what they're up against tonight.
37:58It's human crazy golf. Our teams will take it in turn to negotiate their way around our golf course.
38:00Which section they complete, they'll unlock a question for their team.
38:02There's points for every correct answer and three bonus points for the team who completes the course.
38:07in the fastest time. Okay, let's bring out our teams.
38:11aaaaaaaaaaaaaaSaimes.
38:13It's final round. It's time for our final final round. Let's see what they're up against tonight.
38:17It's human crazy golf. Our teams will take it in turns to negotiate their way around our golf course.
38:24Which section they complete, they'll unlock a question for their team.
38:27there's points for every correct answer and three bonus points
38:30for the team who completes the course in the fastest time okay let's bring out our teams
38:57okay tom you in position how do you fancy your chances against tom i'm gonna smoke him in this
39:04lad okay paddy paddy lad the red team is not losing lad tom can i ask you a question yeah
39:10what's your approach getting down there mate what are you thinking survive hope to see my daughter
39:14again okay tom and the blue team your time starts on the sound of the whistle ready go
39:27okay blue team this is your first question this is worth one point how many size
39:55does an official ufc octagon have it is correct on you go
40:15okay question two this one's worth two points which efl team are nicknamed the pilgrims
40:21oh
40:23i don't know it's correct on you go
40:35go go go
40:41oh
40:55oh my god okay this one is worth three points which division does paddy the baddie fight in
41:01oh
41:03oh
41:05oh
41:07oh
41:09oh
41:11oh
41:13oh
41:15oh
41:17oh
41:19oh
41:21oh
41:25oh
41:27oh
41:29oh
41:31oh
41:33oh
41:35oh
41:37oh
41:39oh
41:41oh
41:51oh
41:53oh
41:55oh
41:57oh
41:59oh
42:01oh
42:03oh
42:05oh
42:15oh
42:17oh
42:19oh
42:21oh
42:23oh
42:25oh
42:27oh
42:29oh
42:43oh
42:45oh
42:47oh
42:49oh
42:51oh
42:53oh
42:55oh
42:57oh
43:01oh
43:03oh
43:07oh
43:09oh
43:11oh
43:13oh
43:15oh
43:17oh
43:24Fuck off.
43:26Oh, Nirvana!
43:28No, it's Colorado, where do you go?
43:30Whoa, fucking hell!
43:33Push me, get me up!
43:36Get me up!
43:38What's that piece?
43:40Go on, Paddy!
43:46We've defo done that fast, I don't want me three points.
43:48OK, Paddy, I'm really sorry.
43:50You're supposed to stay in the hole, so we can't count that.
43:52Fuck off.
43:53I'm joking, I'm joking, I'm joking.
43:55Well done, Red Team, you scored three points!
44:00Give it up for Paddy, the Baddy and the Red Team!
44:04I can reveal the team who completed the golf course in the quickest time
44:08was the Red Team!
44:13So that means that tonight's winners are the Red Team!
44:18Paddy!
44:20So thanks to Jamie, Josh and Paddy, Jill, Michael and Tom,
44:23you've been watching The League of Their Own.
44:24Goodnight!
44:25APPLAUSE
44:30.
44:31.
44:32.
44:35.
44:47.
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