New Girl's Jess: The Hard Road to Finding Confidence in Your True Self ✨

The Take Film TV Movie

New Girl’s Jessica Day always quietly believed in herself, but over the course of the show we got to watch her find her own kind of strong, quirky confidence. It wasn’t always an easy road...

Transcript

00:00New Girl's Jessica Day always quietly believed in herself.

00:03But over the course of the show, we got to watch her find her own kind of strong, quirky confidence.

00:08She learned to embrace who she was, no matter what anyone else had to say.

00:12I break for birds. I rock a lot of polka dots. I have touched glitter in the last 24 hours.

00:19But it wasn't always an easy road.

00:22While she never lost her positive demeanor for long,

00:24she definitely had to deal with her own fair share of ups and downs.

00:28I feel like I want to murder someone and also I want soft pretzels.

00:32But no matter how much the world tried to drag her down,

00:35she always found a way to come out on top and turn it into a great lesson for herself and her friends.

00:41So let's take a look at Jess's confidence journey and see what she has to teach us.

00:45Jess, back!

00:47Jess's confidence journey is a bit different from the ones we often see on screen.

00:51While she is in a very down moment when we meet her,

00:54she's not necessarily someone who totally lacks confidence in herself.

00:57She knows that the people around her don't always see eye to eye with her on the things she likes.

01:02Both her style and interests trend very traditionally feminine,

01:06like bows and baking and crafting.

01:08Do you own yarn?

01:09Spools of it.

01:11I craft so much.

01:14Her naturally sweet demeanor can sometimes come across as a little juvenile.

01:19But given that she's a teacher who spends most of her days trying to teach little kids,

01:23that isn't that surprising.

01:25And she genuinely likes all of those kinds of things,

01:28even if they might seem a little silly to other people.

01:30I could pretend to be more like you, Jess,

01:32and live on a sparkly rainbow,

01:34drive a unicorn around,

01:36and just sing all the time.

01:37Yeah, I think you should sing all the time.

01:40While she tries not to onboard everyone else's thoughts about her

01:43and let that affect her self-conception,

01:44she is a very empathetic person

01:47and finds it difficult not to take other people's feelings into account.

01:51Do you just walk around all day thinking about other people's feelings?

01:54Yeah, don't you?

01:55No.

01:56How do you get anything done?

01:58It's hard.

01:59While Jess is generally a very positive, forward-thinking person,

02:02even she sometimes can't make lemonade out of the lemons life throws at her.

02:07And that's a big part of what makes her so relatable.

02:09I'm gonna die alone.

02:11Oh, no.

02:12I am so, so sad right now.

02:15Oh, my heart hurts.

02:17Growing up, Jess was sometimes compared to her beautiful friend Cece,

02:21who literally went on to become a model.

02:23While they never let this drive a wedge between them,

02:25Jess was certainly still aware of the way that she was seen by society

02:28compared to the traditionally beautiful Cece.

02:31This led to her adopting an idea of herself as essentially not the hot one,

02:35to the point that even into adulthood,

02:37she still has a hard time accepting that many people do find her attractive.

02:41She feels uncomfortable when this kind of spotlight is on her

02:44and will try to break the tension by doing something weird

02:47so that she can feel like she's back in her safe quirky box.

02:50While her quirky interests and awkward personality are genuine,

02:54they're also part of a wall she's built up around herself

02:57so that she can feel protected from getting hurt.

03:00We're introduced to Jess at a low point in her life,

03:02when the walls she's built up and the life she tried to pretend she was happy with

03:06have all come crumbling down.

03:08She's returned home from visiting her mother to find her boyfriend Spencer cheating on her.

03:12She hadn't even been that happy in the relationship,

03:14but the betrayal definitely still stings.

03:17She had spent a number of years trying to make this relationship work,

03:21only to have it end in such a depressing way.

03:24While this is momentarily devastating for Jess,

03:26it's also when we get to see the first flashes of her resilience.

03:30Even though she's down, she doesn't give up.

03:32First, she moves in with best friend Cece,

03:34but finds that living with a bunch of models isn't helping her mental state.

03:37So she looks for another solution,

03:39and happens to come across the Craigslist ad that would change her life forever.

03:44While Jess is still reeling from her breakup a bit after she moves in with the guys,

03:48with their encouragement, she quickly finds her footing again.

03:51She always knew deep down that she deserved better than her relationship with Spencer,

03:55but had become boxed in by her own conception of what kind of girl she was,

03:59and what kind of relationship she should be happy with.

04:02With the help of the new perspectives in her life,

04:04and always there for her bestie Cece,

04:07Jess began finding her groove and opening herself up to loving her whole self,

04:11and going after the life she knows she really deserves.

04:13Baby got hurt.

04:15That doesn't mean you stop trying.

04:17Okay?

04:18Okay.

04:19She comes to accept that the things she sometimes gets put down for,

04:23like her overactive imagination, kindness, naivete,

04:26are actually positive qualities.

04:28And I know I'm gullible,

04:30because people tell me that,

04:31and I have no reason not to believe them.

04:33They help her be the person she wants to be,

04:36and build the life she wants.

04:37Because there's nothing wrong with who I am,

04:40and I like having fun at weddings,

04:42and I like dancing.

04:43And if you don't like that,

04:44then tough tater-tater.

04:46And it's actually when she goes against her natural impulses,

04:49or tries to hide important parts of herself,

04:52that she ends up having a bad time.

04:54She realizes that cool doesn't have to mean just one thing,

04:58and anyone that doesn't like her just the way she is,

05:00doesn't deserve to be in her orbit.

05:02I'm sorry I don't talk like Murphy Brown,

05:04and I hate your pantsuit,

05:06and that doesn't mean I'm not smart,

05:08and tough,

05:09and strong.

05:09While she might not always feel super confident,

05:12one big key part of her personality,

05:14is that she is always willing to stand up for herself.

05:17You want me to get real,

05:19and stop being all cutesy and whatever?

05:20Fine.

05:21Let's get real.

05:22You don't do anything.

05:23Even if she feels sad or put down,

05:26she knows that other people treating her poorly is wrong no matter what.

05:30And she, especially after dealing with Spencer,

05:32is willing to walk away from those kinds of negative situations,

05:35even when it's hard.

05:37This even includes breaking up with Nick when he, at the time,

05:40isn't able to give her the kind of relationship she knows she really wants.

05:44And respecting herself in this way,

05:46means that she's able to surround herself with people who truly respect her too.

05:50While they don't always get her interests,

05:53they know that she's an important part of the group that they couldn't live without.

05:56I'm gonna have to go on a craft run, aren't I?

05:58I'm gonna need pipe cleaners, glitter, glue, finger paints,

06:01and six different types of macaroni, and that's just because I'm hungry.

06:03But growth is a never-ending journey,

06:06and Jess certainly continues to hit roadblocks along the way.

06:09Even when she's begun to find her own groove,

06:12her life isn't without setbacks.

06:15She gets laid off from her job that she loves so much,

06:17and has to start figuring out who she is outside of being a teacher.

06:22And that isn't always an easy road.

06:24Job hunt is on.

06:27This hospital website says I can earn up to $700,

06:30and all I have to do is be infected with dengue fever.

06:33A lot of her sense of self was tied up in her job,

06:36and her calling shaping young minds.

06:38And it did so well with her personality.

06:41So having that taken away meant that she was really left to figure out

06:45who Jess Day, the real adult, actually was.

06:48I'm probably fine, but I also might be dead.

06:51She and Cece were, thankfully, never truly pitted against each other

06:54because of their looks and the way we usually see

06:56when there's a hot friend split on screen.

06:58But that doesn't mean that they never had problems.

07:01But because they were real friends,

07:02they knew that their bond was way deeper than surface-level things like looks,

07:06and always had each other's backs.

07:08Do you think if we met today, we would still be friends?

07:13I don't know.

07:15But we're friends now.

07:16Jess's interactions with other women on the show

07:19don't always go so smoothly, however.

07:21She and Nick's girlfriend Julia initially butt heads

07:24because they're essentially polar opposites.

07:26Julia is everything that Jess feels like she isn't

07:28as a sleek, seemingly put-together lawyer.

07:30And Julia, in a very 2010s fashion,

07:33doesn't really gel with Jess's girly vibe at all.

07:36With the cupcakes and the breaking for birds

07:39and bluebirds come and help me dress in the morning.

07:42Oh, I didn't know I was doing a thing.

07:44But Jess stands up for herself

07:46and they're able to find some common ground and work things out.

07:49She hits a similar road bump with Regan,

07:51who takes over her room while she's away for jury duty.

07:54Jess has always been a bit awkward when it comes to intimacy.

07:57While she's become more and more confident in other aspects of her life,

08:00she can still feel a little weird

08:02when it comes to getting close to someone physically.

08:04I don't know what I'm doing emotionally,

08:06or let's be honest, sexually.

08:08Regan, on the other hand, is very in control of her sexuality

08:11and able to be very direct and open about her thoughts in general

08:15in a way that Jess isn't always.

08:17Regan is, at first, a very stereotypical men's dream girl.

08:21God has walked among us

08:22and you went to first base with her several times.

08:25But while Jess may want to learn a bit

08:27about accepting her sexuality from Regan,

08:30Regan wants to be more emotionally open like Jess.

08:33I don't have a lot of friends that are girls.

08:35Oh my god, I think you're my first girlfriend.

08:38In all of these relationships,

08:40we can see how happiness doesn't come from trying to be just like someone else,

08:44but in accepting your differences

08:45and opening yourself up to the growth

08:47that can come from being around people

08:49who engage with the world differently from you.

08:51What makes Jess's confidence journey so instructive

08:54is that it isn't perfect.

08:56She has setbacks and makes mistakes just like everyone else,

08:59but she always finds a way to keep moving forward.

09:02She doesn't experience a huge change in her personality

09:04over the course of her arc

09:05in the way we so often see with main characters on screen,

09:09which we discussed more back in this video.

09:11But that's mainly because

09:12there wasn't really much wrong with her in the first place.

09:15She's not a perfect person, no one is.

09:18But she didn't have some huge, glaring character flaw

09:20that she needed to alter to be able to live a happy life.

09:23She just needed to work on learning to accept herself and love herself more,

09:27which is actually pretty relatable in its own way.

09:29It's easy to get down on ourselves and think that

09:32we just need to rewrite our entire personalities

09:34to be the person we think we should be.

09:36But Jess shows us why it's actually so much more important

09:39to learn to accept ourselves the way we are.

09:42You can't escape destiny.

09:43She comes for us all, that relentless bitch.

09:46She's also able to help her friends

09:48when they run into their own problems with self-confidence

09:50because she knows what it's like

09:52to have to pull yourself out of that hole.

09:54Her advice works because it's not coming

09:56from someone looking down on them,

09:58but because it's coming from their friend

09:59who has plenty of experience with picking herself back up

10:02when things go wrong.

10:04You got knocked down.

10:05It's time to get back up.

10:08I believe in you.

10:10Her positive go-getter attitude

10:11can be grating to her friends at times,

10:13but it's also what allows her to keep going

10:15and not get caught up when she hits obstacles,

10:18emotional or literal.

10:19You know what my Grammy-o said?

10:22Why put off for tomorrow day

10:24what you could say in today day?

10:28Finding inner confidence doesn't mean

10:30that you'll never feel down about yourself again

10:32and also doesn't mean that you need to change yourself

10:34to be someone else before you can acquire it.

10:36You don't like my style.

10:38That's fine.

10:40But I'm not going to change who I am,

10:41so you're just going to have to deal with it

10:43and respect it.

10:44True confidence is about figuring out your true inner self,

10:47what you really like and want out of life,

10:50and becoming unafraid to engage with that version of you

10:53and work to bring it out into the world,

10:55even when that can be scary.

10:57Jess made a positive impact on all of her friends' lives,

11:00and her quirky journey of confidence helps us out too.

11:04Sometimes I think I was bred in a lab to help people.

11:07That's the take.

11:08Click here to watch the video we think you'll love,

11:10or here to check out a whole playlist of awesome content.

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