- 3 months ago
Miles To Go - A writer from Los Angeles, who doesn't believe that relationships can last for him, struggles to mend his most recent failed relationship.
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Short filmTranscript
00:02:00I wish you would pick up or call me back.
00:02:04I just want to talk, alright?
00:02:07I'm around.
00:02:08Call me, please.
00:02:09Bye.
00:02:29All right.
00:02:42All right.
00:02:42I don't know, you know, I mean, it's not like I'm gonna do online dating, right?
00:03:09My friends know better than to set me up with their friends because we all know how that's gonna go
00:03:13And lately I've been in one of those phases where the girls I'm attracted to aren't attracted to me
00:03:18And the ones who are, I'm not attracted to them
00:03:20And, you know, I'm just kind of all over the place
00:03:22I feel like I don't have a lot to offer anyone right now
00:03:24Money's tight as usual and not like I use it on the right things, granted
00:03:28But I doubt that will ever change
00:03:31My sister's the same, so I know what to expect there
00:03:33I speak to my dad basically every day, so, you know, I don't get to see him as much as I'd like to
00:03:37But that's just how it goes
00:03:38And like I said, other than the fact that I haven't been sleeping well lately
00:03:43All is fine, you know, but again, that is cyclical with me, so
00:03:48You don't think that's fallout from the breakup?
00:03:52I don't know
00:03:53I mean, it could be
00:03:55I just, I was sleeping pretty sound there for a while, so
00:03:58But everything does affect everything, right?
00:04:01Well, it's been five months
00:04:03And you were with Julia for a long time
00:04:06It's the most significant relationship you've had, or at least the healthiest
00:04:09Which again is not saying much
00:04:11Well, I don't know that that's true or fair
00:04:14But my point is, some discomfort is to be expected
00:04:18And the sooner you stop judging yourself, the quicker you'll recover
00:04:22And the sooner you'll stop leading yourself down these paths that you'd say you want to stop going down
00:04:27Yeah, that makes sense
00:04:32Dude, you ever read this?
00:04:44It's in my bookshelf
00:04:45People put books in the bookshelf they haven't read all the time
00:04:47Uh, no, you know that that's what this pile's for
00:04:51Oh, dude, I'm so sorry
00:04:52Why would I put a book in my shelf if I haven't read it?
00:04:57Oh, to impress people
00:04:58Like who? You're the only one who's ever here
00:05:00I don't know
00:05:01Yeah, that's right
00:05:02In fact, I can count on both hands how many people have even been inside
00:05:06I mean, not the girls, but the ones who matter
00:05:09Okay, dude, take it easy
00:05:11My sister's been here twice in ten years
00:05:14Trust me, there's no one to impress
00:05:16I was just wondering, man
00:05:18Yes, I've read it three times
00:05:19It's fucking excellent
00:05:20I love it
00:05:21I do too
00:05:22But you know what you have to read, which I keep telling you to read
00:05:24And you're fucking resisting
00:05:26What?
00:05:26Is the corrections
00:05:27Oh, Franzen
00:05:27Yes
00:05:28Yeah, you know what?
00:05:29I remember people talking about it
00:05:31And I get turned off on something so hype, so
00:05:32I don't give a fuck
00:05:33I keep telling you, though
00:05:35This is appropriately hyped, you know?
00:05:36That's some other level shit
00:05:38You have to read it
00:05:39Really?
00:05:41Yes
00:05:41It's that good
00:05:43It's better than that good
00:05:46It's the kind of book that inspires you to write
00:05:48And reminds you that you can't write with shit at the same time
00:05:51I mean, what more do you want?
00:05:54I don't know if that sounds like a good thing
00:05:55It is a good thing, believe me
00:05:57Okay, I'll fucking read it
00:05:59Yes, thank you
00:06:00Just fucking take it already
00:06:01I've been telling you for years now
00:06:03So what's up with the girlies, dude?
00:06:04Nothing
00:06:05Really?
00:06:07Yeah, I'm too all over the place
00:06:08And lately I have, like, zero sex drive
00:06:10Not me, man
00:06:12I want to fuck everything
00:06:13No, I mean, lean 50 girls up against a wall
00:06:15And hike up their skirts
00:06:16I'll fuck every one of them
00:06:17But I just don't have the energy to make it happen, you know?
00:06:19It's like, I don't care
00:06:20Yeah, I know
00:06:22I get it
00:06:22At least it allows you to concentrate on your writing
00:06:25Yeah, well
00:06:25I finished something like a month ago
00:06:27And I've been trying to come up with something new to write
00:06:29But I just
00:06:29I can't find a subject matter that'll hold my interest
00:06:32Hmm
00:06:32Sounds like the same problem you have with girls
00:06:35Basically
00:06:36What's up with Julia?
00:06:39Um
00:06:39Same shit
00:06:41You know
00:06:41I'm calling her
00:06:42And she won't take my calls
00:06:43She won't return my texts
00:06:44She's, you know
00:06:45It's really frustrating
00:06:46Well, you know what, dude
00:06:47She's hurt
00:06:48And, you know
00:06:49It's gonna take some time, I think
00:06:50Yeah, well
00:06:51And the worst part is
00:06:52I know I don't want to get back together with her
00:06:54Because it doesn't work
00:06:55And I'm being selfish by calling her
00:06:57But
00:06:57I'm lonely
00:06:58And
00:06:58I don't know
00:07:00The truth is
00:07:00I miss her
00:07:01I've been there
00:07:03It sucks
00:07:03Oh, my God
00:07:04Did I tell you to fuck the little troll from work?
00:07:06The short little stout girl you said was stalking you?
00:07:10One and only
00:07:10Well, how was it?
00:07:12It was
00:07:12Well, let me put it this way
00:07:14She's a fucking freak, dude
00:07:16Now, she let me put her wherever I wanted
00:07:17And it was fucking awesome
00:07:18You know
00:07:19And I'm completely disgusted with myself
00:07:21So, you're gonna do it again?
00:07:23Oh, definitely
00:07:23Yeah
00:07:24That's what I thought
00:07:25Yeah
00:07:26Out where the river rouse
00:07:29In the bloodwood
00:07:31And the desert
00:07:32Oh
00:07:33Alright, dude
00:07:33Alright, man
00:07:34Don't worry about all that stuff
00:07:41It'll work itself out
00:07:42It always does
00:07:43You know how it goes
00:07:44Yeah
00:07:44Alright, thanks
00:07:46Alright, man
00:07:46I'm gonna go take a dump
00:07:47I'll see you a little later
00:07:48I'll see you a little later
00:07:48As-tu envie de jouer au football cet après-midi?
00:08:04Il danse mal.
00:08:08Je suis désolé.
00:08:10Je ne suis pas ce que ça veut dire.
00:08:13Ce restaurant est meilleur, ce restaurant est bon, il joue bien.
00:08:22Je suis désolé, je suis occupé, je dois travailler, je dois travailler.
00:08:43Sous-titrage ST' 501
00:09:13Sous-titrage ST' 501
00:09:43Sous-titrage ST' 501
00:09:53Sous-titrage ST' 501
00:09:57Sous-titrage ST' 501
00:10:03I told you, I don't want to talk to you.
00:10:05Let me just come over for a second, for ten minutes.
00:10:11No, not idea.
00:10:12But you paused.
00:10:13No, I don't want you coming over.
00:10:15You paused.
00:10:16Listen to me, you can't come over.
00:10:19You see, this is why we don't work.
00:10:22No, we don't work because ultimately no relationships work.
00:10:25Okay, what do you want?
00:10:27I just want to come in and talk to you.
00:10:28But why? You just said that...
00:10:31Because I miss you, okay?
00:10:32No, it's not okay.
00:10:35I mean, yeah, it's okay if you miss me,
00:10:37but it's not really my problem.
00:10:38We're not together. You broke up with me.
00:10:41Can I please just come in?
00:10:43Why?
00:10:43Because I'm fucked up and I just need to talk to you.
00:10:47Just talk?
00:10:48Yes.
00:10:49So if I let you in here,
00:10:52you're just going to sit and we're going to talk?
00:10:54Yeah, I promise. For ten minutes.
00:11:00Fine.
00:11:02Don't get any fucking ideas, okay?
00:11:04We are just talking.
00:11:06Of course.
00:11:06No, not of course.
00:11:09Just talk.
00:11:12Yes, ma'am.
00:11:13I can't fucking believe I let you in.
00:11:21That's how we talk.
00:11:24You did not just say that to me.
00:11:26I'm kidding.
00:11:27I'm kidding.
00:11:30It is how we best communicate.
00:11:31Okay.
00:11:32You know what?
00:11:34You have to go.
00:11:36Leave.
00:11:38Why?
00:11:38I didn't say anything.
00:11:39I didn't say anything.
00:11:39That's exactly right.
00:11:40You didn't say anything.
00:11:42You came here to talk and we fucked instead.
00:11:46Because we enjoy each other.
00:11:48No.
00:11:49It's too confusing.
00:11:50Go.
00:11:51I miss you.
00:11:52You already said that.
00:11:53Yeah, I do.
00:11:54Okay.
00:11:55I'm sure you do.
00:11:56And you know what?
00:11:57I miss you too.
00:11:58But it's not fair.
00:11:59You can't just come around here and fuck me whenever you're lonely and then not be around
00:12:04the rest of the time.
00:12:05So you want to get back together?
00:12:06No, I don't want to get back together.
00:12:08I want you to fucking leave.
00:12:10You're serious?
00:12:11Yes, I'm serious.
00:12:12Go.
00:12:15Go!
00:12:15Okay, Jesus Christ.
00:12:17What the fuck?
00:12:19I didn't do anything.
00:12:22That's right.
00:12:23You didn't.
00:12:24Fuck off.
00:12:36Hey, what's up?
00:12:46Nothing.
00:12:49What's up?
00:12:51About what?
00:12:51What's wrong?
00:12:53Everything.
00:12:54The divorce.
00:12:56I don't have the kids three days a week.
00:12:58I told you.
00:12:59You have to start looking at that in a positive light.
00:13:03But I miss them.
00:13:05Yeah, I know.
00:13:06And I'm sorry.
00:13:07It's just...
00:13:09You have to look at it as like time to do something good for yourself, you know?
00:13:13Something that you can't do the nights you have the kids.
00:13:20Have you spoken to Dad lately?
00:13:22Yeah, I speak to him every day.
00:13:25So I'm worried about him.
00:13:26He's fine.
00:13:28He never calls me.
00:13:30I call him.
00:13:35I should have never gotten divorced.
00:13:38I should have tried harder to make it work.
00:13:41You need to stop thinking like that, okay?
00:13:43Nothing can be changed.
00:13:44You have to stop replaying that tape in your head.
00:13:48No, I should have been better.
00:13:50That wouldn't have changed anything.
00:13:53But I was happy.
00:13:56You weren't happy.
00:13:57It wasn't?
00:14:02No.
00:14:06Like mom?
00:14:11Yeah.
00:14:13I miss mom too.
00:14:22I'm gonna go.
00:14:23I'll call you later, okay?
00:14:24Okay.
00:14:26Okay.
00:14:27Alright.
00:14:27I love you.
00:14:27Bye.
00:14:29Bye.
00:14:51Bye.
00:14:53Bye.
00:14:54Bye.
00:14:54Bye.
00:17:25I'm a slut, however.
00:17:27Why? Because you kissed two guys in one night?
00:17:29Yeah, precisely because of that.
00:17:31And I slept with Paul all the same night.
00:17:33Big deal.
00:17:34Try snorting Ritalin and then masturbating for two and a half hours before sneaking out of the house at 5 a.m. while your wife's asleep to get a blowjob from a transvestite hooker, because nothing less extreme will do at that moment.
00:17:43Okay? You're scaring me.
00:17:45Look, my point is, kissing two guys doesn't make you a slut. It makes you awesome. And Paul's your ex, so technically that doesn't count. Really, you did nothing.
00:17:54Okay, you see? It's precisely that kind of logic that scares me when I'm in a relationship.
00:17:57No. The only logic that scares you while you're in a relationship is the fact that being in a relationship is entirely illogical to begin with, which does explain why women like the idea of relationships so much.
00:18:07Ah, you're such a jerk.
00:18:08Thank you. That's what I've been trying to tell you.
00:18:10Very funny.
00:18:11Hey, um, by the way, you think I'm getting fat?
00:18:13You're so skinny.
00:18:15No.
00:18:16If anyone's fat, it's me.
00:18:17You're skinny.
00:18:18No more dessert.
00:18:20I'm going to eat pizza.
00:18:21Sure.
00:18:22I don't.
00:18:41Sometimes I forget how crazy my past was.
00:18:58Crazy how?
00:18:58Just the fact that I was married alone is crazy.
00:19:02And then sprinkle in all the drugs I did and all the weirdos I engaged with doing them and extramarital sexual encounters and just everything, you know, it was just crazy.
00:19:11Well, you can't say it was boring.
00:19:14No, but it's strange how some things change so dramatically, you know, and other things stay exactly the same.
00:19:20Like, it's ten years since I got divorced.
00:19:22You know, I'm still in therapy.
00:19:24I still can't make a relationship last.
00:19:26I still don't have a solid income.
00:19:27On the other hand, I've been sober for over ten years.
00:19:32No drugs or alcohol, so that's great, you know, and where I was completely untrustworthy, now I have the keys to, like, five different people's places and people want my advice on things.
00:19:42But, you know, again, I'm still going to the massage parlors even though they gross me out and I can't really afford it.
00:19:50Well, you know how I feel about the massage parlors.
00:19:52But just to recap, it's a habit like any other habit.
00:19:55You won't be done until you're done.
00:19:58My concern is why you're going when you go.
00:20:02Because if you're just going for some sort of release or to relax, then it's not so bad.
00:20:06But if you're doing it to avoid or escape some real feelings, then we have an issue.
00:20:11Because it'll eventually affect everything that you do.
00:20:15And I think you're telling me that we have an issue.
00:20:19Yeah.
00:20:20Possibly.
00:20:21Possibly.
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00:20:54hey
00:21:05what are you doing?
00:21:10are you drunk?
00:21:12no
00:21:13yeah you are
00:21:15so what?
00:21:17so I had a few drinks
00:21:19big deal, huh?
00:21:22no big deal
00:21:23I was just going to ask
00:21:24what's going on?
00:21:28you want to come over
00:21:30and talk?
00:21:32now?
00:21:34yeah
00:21:34come over and fuck me
00:21:37I don't think that's such a good idea
00:21:41don't be lame
00:21:45I'm not being lame
00:21:46you are
00:21:48you're lame
00:21:49I'm not lame
00:21:52I just know that you would
00:21:53regret it tomorrow
00:21:54and be mad at me
00:21:56okay
00:21:57okay
00:21:58I'll come to you
00:22:00you can't drive
00:22:02I'll take a cab
00:22:04that's ridiculous
00:22:05come on
00:22:06I'll come over
00:22:08I don't want to fuck
00:22:10not tonight
00:22:16not tonight
00:22:16you have someone over there
00:22:24don't you?
00:22:26what?
00:22:26no
00:22:26no one's here
00:22:27what's their name?
00:22:29there's
00:22:30there's no name
00:22:31no one's here
00:22:32then why are you laughing?
00:22:35you know I laugh
00:22:36when I tell you the truth
00:22:37and you don't believe me
00:22:38I'm not laughing
00:22:40because you don't want to
00:22:42fuck to you
00:22:43oh come on
00:22:44Julia
00:22:44are you being
00:22:45hello?
00:22:48what the fuck?
00:23:03fuck
00:23:03fuck
00:23:03fuck
00:23:05fuck
00:23:06fuck
00:23:36Oh, my God.
00:24:06Something's got to change.
00:24:33It's ridiculous.
00:24:36It's ridiculous.
00:25:06It's ridiculous.
00:25:08It's ridiculous.
00:25:16Hey.
00:25:44Hi.
00:25:45Sorry, I didn't know when you were gonna get here, so I didn't get you a coffee.
00:25:50No, that's okay.
00:25:51Um, I'll just grab one.
00:25:53Do you need anything else?
00:25:54No.
00:25:55I'm good.
00:25:57I'll be right back.
00:25:58Just one second.
00:26:01And... done.
00:26:04Okay.
00:26:08Thank you for coming to meet me.
00:26:10Of course.
00:26:11I feel completely embarrassed about last night.
00:26:14It's just me.
00:26:16I know.
00:26:17I just...
00:26:19I had too much wine and I got carried away and let my emotions get the better of me and
00:26:25I wanted to apologize for that.
00:26:27And for...
00:26:29the other night.
00:26:30No.
00:26:31No.
00:26:32I should apologize for the other night.
00:26:34That was my fault.
00:26:35I knew what was gonna happen when I let you in and I let you in anyway.
00:26:39Still...
00:26:40I shouldn't have come over after you specifically asked me not to, so...
00:26:45I'm sorry.
00:26:47It's just confusing, you know?
00:26:50Yeah.
00:26:51I know.
00:26:53I can't be partially involved with you.
00:26:58I wish that I could, but I can't and I know that, so...
00:27:03You know, you don't have to decide right now.
00:27:06In fact, I would prefer it if you took a little time before making that kind of decision, but...
00:27:11For me, I need us to be fully committed or no contact at all.
00:27:18I understand.
00:27:21I agree.
00:27:23Can I ask you something?
00:27:26Of course.
00:27:27You can ask me anything, you know that.
00:27:29It's just that...
00:27:32When we were together, you would make all of these jokes and comments about our inevitable ending
00:27:38and how relationships can never work and...
00:27:43I just...
00:27:45I know that we've talked about this before, but I gotta know.
00:27:49Do you really think that every relationship is doomed from the start?
00:27:53It's not like I don't think relationships can last, you know?
00:27:56I know they can.
00:27:58My parents were married almost 45 years when my mother died, so I know they last.
00:28:02It's just...
00:28:04It's like I get restless, you know?
00:28:07And...
00:28:09I know this is gonna sound terrible, but...
00:28:12I lose interest.
00:28:14But not entirely, just kind of...
00:28:17Basically, you mean...
00:28:20Sexually, you lose interest.
00:28:22Yeah.
00:28:24But...
00:28:25It's not like I don't wanna have sex with you anymore.
00:28:27I mean, I do.
00:28:28I clearly showed you that I do the other night.
00:28:30It's just...
00:28:31Not at the intervals you would want if we were in a relationship.
00:28:34I mean...
00:28:35Half of our issues when we were together were you initiating sex and me not reciprocating it at any given moment.
00:28:41And then, understandably so, but the hurt feelings that surrounded it.
00:28:45I just don't think that a connection like we have should be ignored.
00:28:53I think that it should be acknowledged and nurtured and I'm not blaming you.
00:28:59Trust me, I know that I'm just as responsible and I know that relationships are tough and that there's a lot of ups and downs.
00:29:08But...
00:29:09Like I said...
00:29:11For me, it's...
00:29:13All or nothing.
00:29:14So...
00:29:15You know...
00:29:16Take some time to think about it.
00:29:18Talk to your therapist and do whatever you have to do, but let me know.
00:29:21Because I think that we could have something...
00:29:26Really great...
00:29:28If we would just...
00:29:30Get out of our own way and let it grow.
00:29:33Okay.
00:29:34I will.
00:29:35And trust me, it's not like I haven't given it any thought for the last five months.
00:29:40So...
00:29:41You know I'll take it serious.
00:29:42I knew you would.
00:29:43Can I ask you one more thing?
00:29:44Yeah?
00:29:45Did you have a girl over last night?
00:29:46No.
00:29:47You did, didn't you?
00:29:48No, I didn't.
00:29:49You did, didn't you?
00:29:50No.
00:29:51I didn't.
00:29:52I didn't.
00:29:53I didn't.
00:29:54I didn't.
00:29:55I didn't.
00:29:56I didn't.
00:29:57I didn't.
00:29:58I didn't.
00:29:59I didn't.
00:30:00I didn't.
00:30:01You did, didn't you?
00:30:02No, I didn't.
00:30:03I swear.
00:30:04Yeah, you don't have to get all crazy.
00:30:06It's fine if you did.
00:30:07Shut up.
00:30:08Pish posh.
00:30:10Pish posh.
00:30:11Yeah.
00:30:12Uh huh.
00:30:13Yeah, pish posh.
00:30:14Alright.
00:30:15Everyone's saying it.
00:30:20Babe?
00:30:21Yeah?
00:30:22Can you grab me another roll of toilet paper?
00:30:24Look on the floor between the toilet and the tub.
00:30:27There's a box of wet wipes.
00:30:29When did you start using wet wipes?
00:30:32Three, four months ago?
00:30:34Uh huh.
00:30:35I like a clean and comfy asshole.
00:30:37Oh, come on.
00:30:38Seriously?
00:30:41I do.
00:30:44Okay, Spider-Man.
00:30:45Why is he a newspaper boy?
00:30:47Why?
00:30:48He could be doing stuff for 24 hours a day.
00:30:51They don't have like a six cent.
00:30:53Spiders don't have a six cent.
00:30:54I'll Google it after you go to sleep.
00:30:56You're not Googling anything.
00:30:57You're staying here.
00:30:58Why don't we go outside?
00:31:02Look.
00:31:03I'm a troll.
00:31:04No!
00:31:05While you're getting it.
00:31:06Oh God, no.
00:31:07Not the feet.
00:31:08No.
00:31:09No claw feet.
00:31:10Rehab?
00:31:11What am I doing in rehab?
00:31:13Uh huh.
00:31:14Yeah!
00:31:17Hello!
00:31:18Hello!
00:31:19Hello.
00:31:21Hello.
00:31:23Have you sleep?
00:31:27I didn't.
00:31:29That's right.
00:31:33Of course.
00:31:35I'll talk to you later.
00:31:37I'll talk to you later.
00:31:39I didn't.
00:31:41That's right.
00:31:45Of course.
00:31:47I'll talk to you later.
00:31:49Later night.
00:31:59Bye.
00:32:01Have a good day.
00:32:03You too.
00:32:17No.
00:32:19I think that's just depression.
00:32:21I'm not debating the depression.
00:32:23I'm just saying it stems from the meaninglessness.
00:32:25Yeah.
00:32:26And I agree.
00:32:27Everything's meaningless except that which we give meaning to.
00:32:29And you don't find that depressing?
00:32:31No.
00:32:32I find it life-affirming and motivating.
00:32:34What depresses me is the fact that it'll all end one day.
00:32:37Then why does anything matter?
00:32:39It doesn't ultimately speaking.
00:32:41Individually it does because it's all I've got.
00:32:43I just find that so depressing.
00:32:45I think I'm the type of guy who needs to believe that there's something else out there.
00:32:49That there's a bigger purpose.
00:32:50I don't know.
00:32:51God.
00:32:52Buddha.
00:32:53Allah.
00:32:54Great spirit.
00:32:55I don't always believe.
00:32:56But I think I feel better when I do.
00:32:58Yeah.
00:32:59And I say it doesn't matter because if there is a God we all return to him whether we believe
00:33:03or not or whether you're Mother Teresa or Hitler.
00:33:06So you don't believe in hell?
00:33:08The valley comes close.
00:33:11Wait a minute.
00:33:12How did we get into the subject?
00:33:14I honestly don't remember.
00:33:16Julia.
00:33:17Yeah.
00:33:18So what are you going to do?
00:33:20I honestly have no idea.
00:33:24I think you should go for it, bro.
00:33:26Appreciate it.
00:33:27And honestly I don't know why I'm so ambivalent.
00:33:30I mean I love Julia.
00:33:32We have fun together.
00:33:33She makes me laugh.
00:33:34I just...
00:33:35So?
00:33:36What's the biggest reason you're hesitant?
00:33:39Mostly because I think of all the reasons we broke up in the first place and I can't
00:33:43imagine them not coming up again and probably faster and all at once.
00:33:47The girls are so fucking crazy.
00:33:49Yeah.
00:33:50I mean not that we're exactly a couple of picnics but...
00:33:53No definitely not.
00:33:54I'm the fucking worst.
00:33:56I'm the worst.
00:33:57No.
00:33:58I'm the worst.
00:33:59Listen.
00:34:00The girls are about to give me head.
00:34:01Right?
00:34:02And my cock is hard.
00:34:03Right?
00:34:04But it's not fully hard.
00:34:05You know?
00:34:06So there's full length but there's still a little slack in it you know?
00:34:09And I just like to take my cock and just take it and just slap him in the face like
00:34:13this.
00:34:14Just a little bit.
00:34:15Just...
00:34:16Hi baby.
00:34:17Hi.
00:34:18Fuck.
00:34:19And I just get such a kick out of that dude.
00:34:21Yeah.
00:34:22You're the worst.
00:34:23Yeah.
00:34:24I told you.
00:34:25Let's go to the Grove and start some fucking tits or something.
00:34:28Titty time it is.
00:34:29Yeah.
00:34:30Let's go.
00:34:51I'm just gonna get some...
00:34:52Um.
00:34:53Whatever.
00:34:54Hey.
00:34:55She's looking at your partner.
00:34:56She's looking at a short time.
00:34:57I'm just gonna get some of the 1993 items.
00:35:02I was saying...
00:35:03Uh-huh.
00:35:04Let's go.
00:35:05I said I was gonna get some of the new poker cards.
00:35:07I thought I'd make it more.
00:35:08I didn't make it more.
00:35:09I did make it more.
00:35:10I couldn't make it more.
00:35:11Uh-huh...
00:35:12All right.
00:35:13I didn't make it more.
00:35:14I didn't put a short time to make it.
00:35:16I didn't really take it more.
00:35:17It's one day in my bed.
00:35:18Hey, we were texting too much, so I figured calling was easier.
00:35:34What are you doing?
00:35:36Nothing, I'm just writing, but, you know, I can...
00:35:38Oh, go back to writing, we can talk later.
00:35:40No, no, it's fine, what's going on?
00:35:42Oh...
00:35:43Boy issues?
00:35:46Am I that obvious?
00:35:47What are you talking about?
00:35:48I'm always fucked up over something or the other.
00:35:51Yeah, but you never complain to me or ask me for any advice.
00:35:55That isn't true, is it?
00:35:57A little.
00:35:58Huh.
00:36:01Can I ask you something?
00:36:04Yeah, of course.
00:36:05You want to meet up?
00:36:07I could use the fresh air.
00:36:08And seeing your face...
00:36:11Fair warning, I look disgusting.
00:36:12So, what does it mean when a guy calls you at midnight, and you go to his house, and you start messing around, and just as it's about to turn into sex, he says he just wants to cuddle.
00:36:26Who's the guy?
00:36:28It doesn't matter.
00:36:28Is this someone new?
00:36:30Do we have someone new in the roster?
00:36:32No, maybe.
00:36:34Yeah.
00:36:36Where did you meet him?
00:36:37It doesn't matter.
00:36:38From work?
00:36:39Another person from work?
00:36:41Don't judge me.
00:36:42I'm not judging.
00:36:43Trust me, I'm impressed.
00:36:44I mean, we should all be so gainfully employed.
00:36:47Shut up.
00:36:48Anyway, it's a guy who's been coming in and hitting on me for months, and I finally gave him my number, and of course, now I'm regretting it.
00:36:55Okay, so wait.
00:36:55You gave some guy at work your number.
00:36:58He called you over for a booty call or whatever.
00:37:00You got to his house and started messing around.
00:37:02Yeah.
00:37:04Were your clothes on or off?
00:37:06My top was off, my pants were on.
00:37:08And what about him?
00:37:09Boxers.
00:37:11Okay, so you're messing around with some guy you've never messed around with.
00:37:14You're topless.
00:37:15He's in boxers, and suddenly he wants to cuddle.
00:37:18Yeah, weird, right?
00:37:20Well, I mean, to be fair, a number of things could have happened.
00:37:23Let me ask you this.
00:37:24Was he hard?
00:37:25Oh, yeah.
00:37:25That was definitely not the problem.
00:37:27Does he do drugs?
00:37:29I don't think so.
00:37:30I mean, I don't know.
00:37:30We had a couple glasses of wine, but he wasn't doing drugs in front of me.
00:37:33Why?
00:37:34Well, I mean, if he had been on cocaine, for example, he might have been hard while messing around, but concerned that he would lose it if you started to actually have sex.
00:37:43That can happen?
00:37:44Yeah.
00:37:44And it's kind of the worst when it does.
00:37:48It's the opposite of not being able to get it up at all, and a lot harder to explain why.
00:37:54Trust me.
00:37:55Yep, I could see that.
00:37:57Okay, so if he wasn't doing drugs, and you weren't too drunk...
00:38:00No, we just had a couple glasses each.
00:38:04Then that leads me to one conclusion.
00:38:06Okay.
00:38:08He came in his boxers while messing around, and he was too embarrassed to say anything, so he turned it into an I'm a nice guy who didn't just call you over here to fuck, and you can tell because, hey, look at this.
00:38:17No sex, and we're cuddling.
00:38:19Guys do not do that.
00:38:21Oh, yeah.
00:38:21Guys do that.
00:38:22Trust me.
00:38:24I've done that.
00:38:25It's what we do.
00:38:26That's kind of...
00:38:27That is what guys...
00:38:28That defines a guy.
00:38:30So, you don't think it's because he was grossed out by me?
00:38:33Shut the fuck up.
00:38:35You're gorgeous.
00:38:36No, I'm not.
00:38:36Yes, you are.
00:38:37Shut up.
00:38:39Anyway, enough about me.
00:38:41Have you heard from Julia?
00:38:42Hey, you.
00:38:52Hey.
00:38:54What's up?
00:38:55Nothing.
00:38:56I just reheated some Chinese food.
00:38:59Oh.
00:39:01Do you want to come eat something over here instead?
00:39:08Um...
00:39:08Yeah, for sure.
00:39:10You don't have to.
00:39:11No, I want to.
00:39:12I just...
00:39:13I don't have an answer yet.
00:39:17I know.
00:39:20Look, I said just take your time with that.
00:39:22I just thought it would be nice to see you.
00:39:25I could whip something up.
00:39:26We could watch a movie.
00:39:29Hmm?
00:39:29Hmm?
00:39:31Hmm?
00:39:33Um...
00:39:33Yeah, okay.
00:39:36All right.
00:39:38Let me just change real quickly and...
00:39:41I'll, um...
00:39:42I'll drive over.
00:39:43I'll sleep like 30 minutes.
00:39:44Okay.
00:39:45Yeah!
00:39:46All right.
00:39:47Settle down.
00:39:47Let's...
00:39:48Take it.
00:39:50Yeah, I'm still.
00:39:51All right.
00:39:52Okay.
00:39:53You settle down.
00:39:55Oh.
00:39:55All right.
00:39:56You settle down.
00:39:56You're much.
00:39:57Hurry up.
00:39:58I'll see you in a little bit.
00:39:59Okay.
00:40:00All right.
00:40:00Bye.
00:40:01Bye.
00:40:01Bye.
00:40:02Bye.
00:40:02Bye.
00:40:03Bye.
00:40:03Bye.
00:40:04Bye.
00:40:04Bye.
00:40:05Bye.
00:40:05Bye.
00:40:06Bye.
00:40:06Bye.
00:40:07Bye.
00:40:07Bye.
00:40:08Bye.
00:40:08Bye.
00:40:09Bye.
00:40:09Bye.
00:40:10Bye.
00:40:11Bye.
00:40:11Bye.
00:40:12Bye.
00:40:12Bye.
00:40:13Bye.
00:40:13Bye.
00:40:14Bye.
00:40:15Bye.
00:40:16Bye.
00:40:16Bye.
00:40:17Bye.
00:40:17Bye.
00:40:18Bye.
00:40:18Bye.
00:40:19Bye.
00:40:20Bye.
00:40:20Bye.
00:40:21Bye.
00:40:22Bye.
00:40:23Bye.
00:40:24Bye.
00:40:25Bye.
00:40:26Bye.
00:40:27Bye.
00:40:28Bye.
00:40:29Bye.
00:40:30Bye.
00:40:31I thought you were cooking for us.
00:40:39Well, I can't say you don't keep it interesting.
00:40:42But in all seriousness, I think it's a good thing.
00:40:46You said you're writing more consistently now?
00:40:48I mean, as much as I ever have, you know.
00:40:50I'm just not sure if I'm inspired by her or by being back with her
00:40:54or if just not feeling lonely has freed up my mind to be creative again.
00:40:58So you're not sure whether you're happy because of her specifically
00:41:02or happy because you're unstuck and feeling free creatively.
00:41:06And then on top of that, you're not sure whether it's her that unstuck you
00:41:09or whether that was just coincidental.
00:41:12Yeah.
00:41:13Well, I think you would be cheating yourself and Julia
00:41:16if you didn't give her at least some of the credit.
00:41:19Granted, I'm sure that if you met someone else, someone new,
00:41:22you would have hit your stride again.
00:41:24And if you hadn't met somebody else
00:41:26and hadn't gotten back together with Julia,
00:41:28I'm sure you would have gotten back in the saddle creatively eventually.
00:41:32It's just a matter of when.
00:41:35It's just...
00:41:37I love Julia.
00:41:38You know, I really do.
00:41:39I just don't see how it can last.
00:41:41I mean, with her or with anyone.
00:41:42You know, I mean, I think about it.
00:41:44I try to envision it, but I just don't see how it's possible.
00:41:47You know, I feel like I'm broken.
00:41:50You're not broken.
00:41:51You just lose interest.
00:41:52And that's not a bad thing.
00:41:54Some people are like that.
00:41:55Other people aren't.
00:41:56I notice a lot of the people that I see that are creative tend to be similar.
00:42:02You just have to figure out ways of reinvigorating your interest.
00:42:05Yeah.
00:42:06I call it the George Clooney curse, you know.
00:42:09And the only reason it's a curse is because I'm not George Clooney.
00:42:13I mean, because if I were George Clooney or if I had his status, you know,
00:42:16I'd love breaking up with people every couple of years
00:42:19because then it's just right on to the next supermodel or gorgeous actress or stunning waitress, you know.
00:42:25But when you're me, the offers aren't exactly pouring in, you know.
00:42:29Nobody's throwing themselves at me.
00:42:30And let's face it, when they do, they're usually quite fucked up, you know.
00:42:35And while I can't say that I'm positive George Clooney is happy, you know,
00:42:39I'd trade my female opportunities for his any day.
00:42:42First of all, I just have to say, I love you.
00:42:45You are so funny.
00:42:47But here's how I'd look at it.
00:42:49You're an explorer.
00:42:50You thrive on new things, new discoveries.
00:42:53Yeah, but I also love the comfort of routine and loyalty, you know.
00:42:57I like knowing what I have, and I like not worrying about diseases.
00:43:02I hate condoms, you know.
00:43:04No, it's true.
00:43:05It's true.
00:43:05And in theory, I would love to have a steady girl who I can grow old with,
00:43:09but it just, it always comes back to the sex, you know.
00:43:13They want it continuously, and it literally makes me want to crawl out of my skin and run away sometimes.
00:43:19Like, I just, I can't bring myself to do it, you know.
00:43:21And then that freaks them out, and the real problems begin.
00:43:25I don't know.
00:43:28Here's my advice.
00:43:29Take it slow with Julia.
00:43:31Get back together, but this time be really present.
00:43:34Commit.
00:43:35Make yourself adhere to the unwritten rules of a relationship.
00:43:38Knock off the massage parlors.
00:43:40Stop thinking about how it's going to fail.
00:43:43Just see how it goes.
00:43:44Then, worst case scenario, if you break up, then you're back where you started.
00:43:49But you have to be honest with her.
00:43:51As soon as you're positive you can't do it, you've got to tell her.
00:43:55You owe her at least that.
00:44:00Yeah, okay.
00:44:06You're right.
00:44:07Hi, sweetie, it's me.
00:44:14You're probably writing or something.
00:44:16Anyway, give me a call.
00:44:18I was hoping that maybe you'd come with me to this dinner party at Evelyn's tonight.
00:44:23It's nothing formal, just the usual friends, good food.
00:44:26You know, it'll be fun.
00:44:28Okay, so call me back.
00:44:30Bye.
00:44:30I'm so happy you decided to come along.
00:44:38I've been dreading going to this all week.
00:44:40And not because it wouldn't be fun, but because, you know, it's all couples and I want to be the fifth wheel, you know?
00:44:45Yeah, who's all going to be there?
00:44:48What's that?
00:44:49Who's all going?
00:44:52Well, Evelyn and Richard, of course.
00:44:55And Stella will be there with her new boyfriend.
00:45:02What's wrong?
00:45:03Nothing.
00:45:05You look fucking phenomenal.
00:45:08Doc, you're making me blush.
00:45:10You really do.
00:45:13You look absolutely incredible.
00:45:21Mm-hmm.
00:45:23What?
00:45:25Let me put it in real quick.
00:45:27What? No!
00:45:27Come on, just for a second.
00:45:29No!
00:45:30Yes!
00:45:31Come on!
00:45:35Maybe later, if you're good.
00:45:37Oh.
00:45:37I'll be on my best behavior.
00:45:41Better be.
00:45:42If you better believe I will.
00:45:46It is all about how you feel about your partner.
00:45:51No, I'm not saying it's not important.
00:45:54I'm just saying that it can't be the entire reason.
00:45:56I mean, you have to enjoy it also.
00:45:58No, no, no, no, no.
00:45:59I disagree.
00:46:00I think if you, if you love your partner enough, you will want to do it simply because it pleases them.
00:46:06Aw, cheers, love.
00:46:08Okay.
00:46:09Hold on.
00:46:09Hold on.
00:46:10Look, I can't be the only person who thinks this way.
00:46:12I'm not crazy.
00:46:13No.
00:46:14No, you're not crazy.
00:46:16Uh-uh.
00:46:16Shush.
00:46:17No, I actually, I do, I understand what Miles means.
00:46:20You do?
00:46:21Yeah.
00:46:22It's like, um, you know, it's like anal sex.
00:46:25What?
00:46:25What?
00:46:25What?
00:46:26How are you guys?
00:46:27Hello.
00:46:28Seriously, though, hear me out on this one.
00:46:30This is going to be interesting.
00:46:31Yeah, it's like anal sex.
00:46:34Okay?
00:46:35Jeez.
00:46:35It's not like, I mean, listen, it's not like I aspire to do it, but.
00:46:39Wait, wait, wait, wait.
00:46:40Did you just say you didn't aspire to do it?
00:46:42Like, ass, anal, anal.
00:46:44Yeah, no, I get it.
00:46:45It's like inspired.
00:46:47I totally.
00:46:48I think I caught that.
00:46:48I might have caught that.
00:46:50It's so funny.
00:46:51Really.
00:46:51It was great.
00:46:52I get it.
00:46:53Anyway, what I was saying was, it's not like, okay, it's not like I longed to do it, but
00:46:59the guy, I'm sorry, babe, the guy that I was seeing at the time really wanted to, so
00:47:03I, so I did it.
00:47:05I mean, obviously, I wouldn't have done it if I wasn't also just like a little bit curious.
00:47:11Well, I'm not curious.
00:47:13Okay.
00:47:13I'm not curious.
00:47:14I've never been curious.
00:47:16I've never been curious.
00:47:17Oh.
00:47:19Defensive.
00:47:20And luckily for me, Richard never presses the issue.
00:47:24Oh, Richard.
00:47:25Never.
00:47:26I never, never do I press that issue.
00:47:29What a good guy you are.
00:47:31Luckily for you, because, I mean, according to your philosophy, should this beautiful,
00:47:36innocent face decide to press the issue, so to speak, you have to do it just to please
00:47:41him, right?
00:47:41Theoretically.
00:47:44Hey, that is what you said.
00:47:46I know, I know I just said that.
00:47:47I just, I just feel like...
00:47:49What?
00:47:50I feel like anal sex is its own gray area.
00:47:54Don't you mean brown area?
00:47:55Bring up anal sex.
00:47:59Okay, enough of that.
00:48:00Anyway, let me get this straight.
00:48:02You're separating anal sex from oral sex?
00:48:05Well, yeah.
00:48:06Okay, so you're a hypocrite.
00:48:07No, I'm not a hypocrite.
00:48:09Well, I think that they're both great.
00:48:13Shut up, you two.
00:48:16Anyway, my point about the whole thing was that...
00:48:19That's right, you had a point.
00:48:20Babe, don't be upset that I said that.
00:48:23I'm not upset.
00:48:24He's upset.
00:48:25Definitely upset.
00:48:26We'll take care of it later.
00:48:27Don't you worry.
00:48:28Don't you worry.
00:48:30Anyway, my point is that...
00:48:32Well, it's something that I have enjoyed just, I don't know, a few times.
00:48:37For the most part, I didn't love it.
00:48:39Then why do you continue to do it?
00:48:41I don't know.
00:48:42Probably just to please them, like you said.
00:48:45And actually, you know what?
00:48:47This is why.
00:48:47Really?
00:48:47I think because every single guy has a little bit of gay in them and just needs to be in somebody's asshole.
00:48:57Okay, Stella.
00:49:00Okay, let's...
00:49:03Let's bring this back to food-appropriate conversation.
00:49:07Wait, you didn't like that?
00:49:08One second.
00:49:08Stella.
00:49:09What?
00:49:09Yes.
00:49:10If I may.
00:49:11You may.
00:49:12Well, that was not exactly what I was saying.
00:49:15It was a pretty good anal-a-gee.
00:49:17I like...
00:49:18How long?
00:49:20What?
00:49:20How long?
00:49:21How long have you been?
00:49:22Spontaneous.
00:49:22Really spontaneous.
00:49:23Just, whoa, I've been thinking about this all night.
00:49:25Hoping that anal sex would be the conversation.
00:49:28And move to the living room.
00:49:29Yes, please.
00:49:30What did you cook for us, Richard?
00:49:33Brownie.
00:49:33Are they special?
00:49:35He did, honey.
00:49:36He did with your kitchen all day.
00:49:38I think he means brownies is what he's saying.
00:49:40All right.
00:49:41All I heard was special brownies.
00:49:44Oh, Stella.
00:49:46Special brownies.
00:49:47Open.
00:49:48We're adults.
00:49:50Okay, so we all agree enough with these fucking Kardashians and Jersey Shore assholes.
00:49:56Yes.
00:49:56Right?
00:49:56No argument.
00:49:57Agreed.
00:49:58Yeah, in fact, I'd take it one step further and say, let's just do away with all reality
00:50:02television and Facebook.
00:50:04No.
00:50:05No.
00:50:05No way.
00:50:06I love Facebook.
00:50:07Yeah, of course you do.
00:50:08I mean, your whole generation was built on it.
00:50:10Your parents probably met on it.
00:50:12Fuck you.
00:50:12I'm not that fucking young, and you're a jerk.
00:50:15Oh, babe.
00:50:17Read him your new gangster rap.
00:50:19Your new gangster rap.
00:50:19I think you're a gangster rap.
00:50:21You're a gangster rap.
00:50:21Let's hear it.
00:50:22Come on.
00:50:22Gangsta rap.
00:50:24Gangsta rap.
00:50:25Gangsta rap.
00:50:27Gangsta rap.
00:50:29Gangsta rap.
00:50:30Okay, okay.
00:50:31Gangsta rap.
00:50:32Please, stop saying gangster.
00:50:34Okay, wait, wait, wait.
00:50:35Let me turn off the music.
00:50:36Okay.
00:50:37Hold on.
00:50:38All right, but look, I'm warning you.
00:50:39It's just some bullshit I like to do when I'm bored.
00:50:42All right.
00:50:46Okay, here it goes.
00:50:47Read it.
00:50:49Do it.
00:50:49Go on.
00:50:49Okay, okay.
00:50:51I'll read it.
00:50:52Okay, let's see it.
00:50:54Okay.
00:50:56Homie's got a lip.
00:50:58Niggas be tripping.
00:50:59If your bitch is talking shit, she gonna get a dick limping.
00:51:02What?
00:51:05Pussies be popping.
00:51:07Alligator hounding.
00:51:08Stuffing bags full of kitties in the rivers we drown in.
00:51:11That's right, baby.
00:51:15Stationary mama.
00:51:17Forget about the grave.
00:51:18With a gat at your back, better lead this black parade.
00:51:21Here comes my favorite line.
00:51:23Marinated zombie.
00:51:23Marinated zombie.
00:51:25Hey, can I finish?
00:51:27Yeah, yeah.
00:51:27Jesus.
00:51:29What, no?
00:51:30All right, where was I?
00:51:31Hey, hey, hey, hey.
00:51:33Can you please start from the beginning?
00:51:34Yeah, I think you should, too.
00:51:36Yes.
00:51:36And I think you should actually wrap it.
00:51:38Yeah, wrap it.
00:51:40Okay, everybody.
00:51:41Okay, guys.
00:51:41Okay, okay.
00:51:42I'm not doing this again.
00:51:43You haven't even done it the first time.
00:51:44Yeah, because you keep interrupting.
00:51:45Yes, yes, yes.
00:51:47You, you, shut up.
00:51:49You, shut up.
00:51:50Everybody shut up.
00:51:51Wrap, please.
00:51:53I need a beat, though.
00:51:54Mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm.
00:51:59Homies got a lip, niggas be trippin'.
00:52:03If your bitch is talkin' shit, she gonna get her dick limpin'.
00:52:06Pussies be poppin', alligator houndin'.
00:52:08Stuffin' bags full of kitties in the river we drownin'.
00:52:11Stationary mama, forget about your grave with the gat at the back.
00:52:15Better lead this black beret.
00:52:17Marinated zombie, decorated detective.
00:52:20The hood be fucked up and my family be neglected.
00:52:23Isolated Jesus, ventricle of poison.
00:52:25Hard to run from yourself.
00:52:27When it's pain you enjoyin', hang the lamb from the collar.
00:52:31Vehement lust.
00:52:33It might be God we need, but it's in money we trust.
00:52:36Woo!
00:52:38Break it up!
00:52:40Yeah, yeah, yeah!
00:52:41I told you'd get strange here tonight.
00:52:44Want one?
00:52:45Yeah, I want one.
00:52:49So.
00:52:54What?
00:52:55Oh, don't give me what.
00:52:59What is going on with you two?
00:53:00Yeah, okay, what's happening?
00:53:02Nothing.
00:53:03Nothing, oh.
00:53:05Are you buying this?
00:53:06No, I'm really not buying it.
00:53:09We're hanging out.
00:53:13Are you okay with that?
00:53:15Yeah, for this second.
00:53:18Yeah.
00:53:20Okay.
00:53:21What?
00:53:21I'm having.
00:53:25Come on, Evie.
00:53:26What?
00:53:28Just be careful.
00:53:30I am.
00:53:32Are you sure?
00:53:33Because.
00:53:33Yes, I'm sure.
00:53:34I'm fine.
00:53:35And it was my last time.
00:53:38It was my idea.
00:53:40Okay, we're just looking out for you.
00:53:42I mean, yeah, Jules, come on.
00:53:44What do you expect?
00:53:45The last time you guys broke up,
00:53:46all you could say was
00:53:47how wishy-washy he was
00:53:50and how unsettling that is.
00:53:52Okay, well,
00:53:54I appreciate your concern,
00:53:57but I'm a big girl
00:53:59and I can handle it.
00:54:01And I'm happy.
00:54:05So.
00:54:08Okay.
00:54:09Good.
00:54:09Good, yeah.
00:54:10No, that is good.
00:54:11That is good.
00:54:11We're just watching out
00:54:13for our girl's back.
00:54:15Am I interrupting anything?
00:54:18No.
00:54:19No.
00:54:20No, we were, uh,
00:54:21we were just gossiping.
00:54:22I don't gossip.
00:54:24Do you?
00:54:25Yeah.
00:54:26I'm gonna go,
00:54:28um, see about Brian.
00:54:31Okay.
00:54:32What?
00:54:39What?
00:54:41You know, shut up.
00:54:43What did I miss?
00:54:45Why don't you
00:54:46come into the kitchen with me
00:54:48and help me clean the dishes?
00:54:51Yes, ma'am.
00:54:52Okay.
00:55:02Hey.
00:55:20Aren't you gonna come inside?
00:55:23I don't know.
00:55:25I mean, I want to.
00:55:26I'm just...
00:55:28I'm a little worried
00:55:29maybe we're rushing things.
00:55:32How about
00:55:34you come inside
00:55:36and we get into bed
00:55:38and we snuggle
00:55:40and then fall asleep?
00:55:42Hmm?
00:55:43Okay.
00:55:44Hmm?
00:55:44Okay.
00:55:46Good.
00:55:47All right.
00:55:48All right.
00:56:02All right.
00:56:15All right.
00:56:19All right.
00:56:20All right.
00:56:32The tree, the tree, the reefing
00:56:46He carries us to the hour
00:56:51So walk and walk strong
00:56:57And find the evil song
00:57:01Sing something that will all play
00:57:07Into the light, I will be one
00:57:14Into the light, I will be one
00:57:18Into the light, I will be one
00:57:22Into the light, I will be one
00:57:26To the light, I will never move
00:57:30The dark, I will be one
00:57:32To the dark, I have nothing
00:57:36The one who lives in the night
00:57:41This is how I would stop
00:57:43We must miss the end
00:57:49The light will be one
00:57:55is this a new sofa that ratty old thing but had that for like three years no longer
00:58:12has it been that long you've been here twice no no you've been inside once so this is your second
00:58:20time I feel so lost you're not lost you're just going through a rough patch does dad know I'm
00:58:29depressed I don't know what dad knows I guess you know I get it from him yeah you've said that before
00:58:37it's true you need to call before you come over I'm your sister I know I did call when you were
00:58:44right outside I miss mom you're all over the place what I'm just saying I wish mom were here
00:58:54yeah so do I but you know she's not you are so much like her I'm not you are I'm really not
00:59:03I'm a perfect mix of mom and dad but with my own crazy shit sprinkled in I am all dad I wouldn't
00:59:11say that I wouldn't say all oh you're right I got a lot of grandma and weird shit in me too
00:59:16she did have a lot of weird shit bizarre yeah do you remember when she made us call her Heidi for a
00:59:23while what was that I don't know and where did she get that name I think it was like a friend she knew
00:59:34from childhood somebody famous exactly somebody famous always
00:59:41so what's been going on with you I feel like I haven't seen you in so long
00:59:51okay I saw you last week and nothing's going on how are you what do you mean I'm fine are you seeing
01:00:02anyone no are you fucking anyone no not even a booty call no stop I don't want to talk to you
01:00:08about this stuff God I'm your sister I just want to know that a baby bro is getting some look stop
01:00:14that's so weird why you are so handsome I'm not you are you could fuck anyone okay you know first of
01:00:23all know that's not true and you know just saying that makes it so much fucking weirder okay so did I
01:00:33tell you I got HPV in my butt okay stop I don't want to talk about this shit with my sister okay I
01:00:40was just gonna tell you they had to use this giant okay look please just stop okay just relax Jesus Christ I
01:00:52don't know what I would do without you why are you getting upset
01:01:00it because fucked everything up you didn't fuck everything up I didn't you didn't yes I did
01:01:14come here come here all right I'm sorry nothing to be sorry about
01:01:29I love you I love you too okay it's okay
01:01:39I may be short but at least I have tiny balls yeah well you know what I always said my dick
01:01:47might not be long but it sure the hell is skinny oh dude check this out bro
01:01:52is this a knife handle yeah carved it out of a deer's antler fucking cool man how long does this
01:02:00take I'd say about three minutes nah it took me like 20 hours man I use a dremel for the initial
01:02:05cuts and then I get in there with the details of finer tools it's fucking awesome man I think it's
01:02:11ridiculous no I think it's great I still have that feather thing you made for me well that thing
01:02:14that's fucking garbage man throw it out oh I like it that's ridiculous anyway I think you're making
01:02:21the right decision with Julia yeah well she told me to take my time to decide but we've seen each
01:02:26other every night since and I don't know it's nice being with her and we have a good time and all it's
01:02:31just I'm not sure that I don't know you know me yeah that's the thing dude it's like when they're
01:02:39not around you miss them you want them you need them but when they're around too much you want them
01:02:43to fucking leave yeah well I was thinking about that and I thought maybe if I just made sure I
01:02:47spent enough nights in my apartment alone you know and just like had a few nights where she
01:02:51you know I don't know yeah you know that's not gonna happen and you know it yeah you're right
01:02:55yeah dude you get some new ink with this yeah I got this in Paris last year what yeah sweet
01:03:05what's this is this will have freedom I am the son of my mother yeah or I am my mother's son
01:03:12dude I like that how come I don't remember that I have no idea I do have an appointment lined up
01:03:17with Lewis to get some new shit though later oh yeah what are you gonna get I'm not sure I always
01:03:23have a list going I keep it in my phone but I'll decide when I get there I hear you I'm gonna get
01:03:28some new shit soon yeah but check this out bro you made this yep it's fucking cool man what is that
01:03:38like a bone and a tooth it's my grandmother's thigh bone this one yeah she's still alive no don't do
01:03:44it look at this dog look at this dog dog hey doggy hey doggy
01:03:51I love you more than ever kiss me baby don't ever leave
01:04:09I got all that I need don't understand if you're giving up dreams but trauma is
01:04:16I got all that I need don't understand if you're giving up dreams but trauma is
01:04:32strife it's all right just give me tonight I love you you love me
01:04:58you
01:05:28we should take a trip somewhere for like a day or two where would you want to go I don't know
01:05:34somewhere close like Palm Springs Catalina or Santa Barbara or something that could be fun
01:05:41forget it it's just an idea no no no we could go yeah let's go okay well we don't have to go to any
01:05:51of those places we could go to San Francisco or something yeah we could go to San Francisco but let's
01:05:57make it a full weekend like Friday to Monday or no what if we went up Thursday and stopped in like
01:06:04Carmel or Monterey or what I like you you like me yes wait wait wait wait wait so you're saying like um
01:06:16so you're saying like um you like me like me what are you doing get out I'm trying to pee
01:06:23well if you like me so much why don't you pee in my mouth what no we're not doing that again pervert get out
01:06:30again you can barely do that the first time what I filled your whole mouth you freaked okay
01:06:36look first of all you were drunk and we were in the shower and I didn't freak you freaked you spit it all out
01:06:43yeah because I wasn't gonna swallow it you were flopping around freaking out like a suffocating
01:06:49little fish bitch okay all right now you've crossed the line okay I wasn't flopping around like a
01:06:54fish bitch which I don't even know what that is but we were in the shower and you were squatted
01:06:58over me okay and I was trying to get out of the position we were no I was but you were covering me I
01:07:03couldn't just push you over without hurting you right and every time you laughed and contracted your stomach
01:07:08more piss on my face yeah still I filled your whole mouth yeah mm-hmm guess what missy you couldn't do it
01:07:18sober I could too you can't pee when someone's in the same room which is why you didn't pee for the last
01:07:2410 minutes do not challenge me I swear to god I will piss in your mouth right now really mm-hmm
01:07:29well I'm challenging you fine challenge accepted yeah I am do it get your face in there it's in there
01:07:38come on let's go yeah get it in come on okay let's go uh waiting it's warming up
01:07:59Julia wants to go out of town together soon that could be good especially since you just made it
01:08:21official be kind of a kickoff trip make you feel like a couple again yeah I think that's her thought
01:08:27too we've already had several classic Julia and Miles moments it's just so easy being together we
01:08:34know each other so well there's an immediate intimacy and comfort level you know just luckily
01:08:39for me none of my weird issues have popped up yet but don't you think Julia has taken into account your
01:08:45weird issues and has included that in her decision to want to be with you would she or would she had
01:08:51hoped that I had changed or wanted to or whatever well my guess and it's just a guess is that she
01:08:58knows who you are or who she thinks you are and accepts this loves you despite your flaws and knows
01:09:05that everybody comes with something and she wants to be with you it's just it's shitty because we have so
01:09:17much fun together and I love Julia to death I'll always love her but I know it can't last because
01:09:23nothing ever lasts with me okay this goes back to what we were talking about last week you need to
01:09:27take one day at a time don't future trip don't overthink it just be present and enjoy being together
01:09:35and if while you're doing this it turns out that you can't be together well then you cross that bridge
01:09:41you cross that bridge when you get there but as always and as we all do you just need to learn to
01:09:47stay out of your own way yeah you're right I mean you're right Julia even said the same thing the other
01:09:56day well she's a smart girl all right let's stop there so I'm gonna be gone for the next two weeks so I'll
01:10:04see three weeks from today and just work on being present oh and I strongly suggest taking that trip
01:10:12it'll tell you where you are with each other much quicker than if you didn't go all right I'll take it
01:10:23all right yay if history shows anything our trips are amazing yeah all right thank you
01:10:35so what time do you think it'll be done I don't know um shouldn't take more than a couple hours
01:10:42okay uh do you want to come over afterwards yeah all right or if you want you can come to my place
01:10:49whatever you prefer all right um how about I'm gonna run some errands and take this ballet class
01:10:57and then I'll just come over to your place at like 7 30.
01:11:01perfect I'll see you then okay talk to you later great have a good one you too bye
01:11:07yeah she's quite the cutie so what are we getting today um I was thinking I printed this
01:11:36design out I was thinking something like that cool you want it exactly like this or you want me to
01:11:47kind of tweak it a little bit probably just that but maybe not all the elements that are surrounding
01:11:54it I just want the main design and not all the colors okay maybe two colors two colors do you know
01:12:01do you know what two colors you want to use I was thinking the the red and black or maybe the green
01:12:06black what do you think I like the red and black all right yeah red and black will look the best I
01:12:12think unless you hate red no no I like red and just a little bigger than that actual sketch okay
01:12:18okay and where are you putting it on my side oh you're going for your side again yeah I know
01:12:29I almost had to strap you down for the last time I tattooed your side wasn't that bad but yes I did think
01:12:35I was gonna leave before we finished yeah that seems to be a pattern with me leaving before I'm finished
01:12:41so
01:12:44you
01:12:46you
01:12:47you
01:13:11all right man well thank you so much no problem man yeah um what do I owe you a hundred bucks cool you
01:13:34remember to take care of it right yeah yeah actually that should be a hundred
01:13:40all right I'll see you later brother thank you so much bye Luna
01:13:47bye Luna
01:13:54oh yeah sexy
01:14:02shut up let me see the new tattoo
01:14:04come in
01:14:06oh my god
01:14:09you put our initials in it fucking crazy yeah well you're special to me and I just wanted you to know that no matter what you always will be
01:14:19why the chicken I don't know she's always wanted a chicken tattoo you hate it no shut up I love it I mean the chicken's funny
01:14:36yeah they're all stupid
01:14:38yeah they're all stupid
01:14:39no they're great
01:14:41you're great
01:14:43mm-hmm
01:14:44I love it
01:14:45thank you
01:14:46of course
01:14:48so
01:14:50are you hungry
01:14:52starving
01:14:53so what do you want to eat
01:14:55um
01:14:56pizza
01:14:57pizza
01:14:58you see
01:14:59this is why I love you okay because you get me
01:15:02uh-huh I've been trying to tell you that for years
01:15:04okay just settle down I just meant you get me in a general way but you took it too far
01:15:10yeah think about what you want to eat on the good menu
01:15:12pepperoni
01:15:13got it
01:15:14you're the best
01:15:20yeah go sit down I'll bring it in yeah
01:15:23okay
01:15:24do you want any orange juice or coffee
01:15:26no I'm okay thank you though
01:15:28all right
01:15:29hey what do you want to do today
01:15:31I don't know what do you want to do
01:15:33do you want to go for a hike
01:15:35maybe
01:15:36maybe
01:15:37okay
01:15:38um
01:15:39do you want to go for a drive
01:15:41yeah
01:15:42let's do a drive
01:15:43yeah okay good
01:15:44we could go through the canyon to the beach
01:15:46maybe
01:15:47perfect
01:15:48let's do that it's been a while
01:15:49yeah I know it has
01:15:50and it's a good day for it too
01:15:52oh it's beautiful
01:15:53it'll be perfect
01:15:55right
01:15:56mm-hmm
01:15:57mm-hmm
01:16:03yeah
01:16:11life
01:16:28love
01:16:29God
01:16:30son
01:16:31once
01:16:32twice
01:16:34I fell in love with a girl
01:16:38she loved me
01:16:43ooh
01:16:44име
01:16:48little
01:16:49can
01:16:50seem
01:16:51too
01:16:52and
01:16:53wick
01:16:54to the life
01:16:55I fell in love with the girl
01:16:58she loved me
01:17:00oh
01:17:01and she loved me
01:17:07You, me, all can see
01:17:23We believe
01:17:25I fell in love with the girl
01:17:29She loved me
01:17:34She loved me
01:18:04She loved me
01:18:34Babe
01:18:42You're really going
01:18:45Yes
01:18:45Unless you can give me some reason why I shouldn't
01:18:49I just can't believe you're this upset
01:18:51I mean, I didn't do anything
01:18:53I had no idea Trisha would be there
01:18:54I can't control where people eat
01:18:57I'm not mad because we ran into Trisha
01:19:00I'm mad because you lied
01:19:02I didn't lie
01:19:03I asked you if you slept with her while we were broken up and you said no
01:19:08I didn't think you really wanted to know
01:19:10I mean, I don't want to know who you slept with
01:19:12I asked you specifically because I didn't want this situation like the exact situation that
01:19:20just happened where someone I know or someone I don't know has information over me regarding
01:19:26my own boyfriend
01:19:26She doesn't have information over you
01:19:29I didn't share our intimate details
01:19:31I wouldn't do that
01:19:32She knew something that I didn't know and she knew that I didn't know that
01:19:35and you two sat there acting all fucking weird like you had some sort of inside joke going on
01:19:40Inside joke?
01:19:41I was uncomfortable
01:19:43Yeah, because you lied!
01:19:45Maybe if you had told the truth then nobody would have been uncomfortable
01:19:49and I wouldn't have been sitting there like a fucking jerk trying to figure out what the fuck is going on
01:19:55Like, is it just me or am I being paranoid or jealous or maybe there's something really off here?
01:20:04I'm sorry
01:20:05I'm gonna go
01:20:06Babe, let's talk about this
01:20:09You know what, we'll talk later
01:20:09Fuck
01:20:15Hey, it's me
01:20:26I can't get to the phone
01:20:28Leave me a message
01:20:28We'll call you back
01:20:29Bye
01:20:29Hey, it's me
01:20:34Can you give me a call?
01:20:43Yeah
01:20:43Alright, I'll talk to you later
01:20:45Yeah, I'll talk to you later
01:20:52I'll talk to you later
01:20:54I'll bring you back to you later
01:20:54I'll bring you back to you later
01:21:26I'm sorry.
01:21:39You know, girls are all crazy.
01:21:41No, I know, but she's right.
01:21:44She has a point, you know?
01:21:45She asked, and I got scared, and I didn't tell her.
01:21:47I know.
01:21:48I know.
01:21:49I'm just trying to lighten the mood.
01:21:50I appreciate it.
01:21:53Has she called since?
01:21:54No.
01:21:55Have you tried calling her?
01:21:57No, you know?
01:21:58I figured she'd call when she settled, or she didn't want to hear from me, or...
01:22:04I don't know.
01:22:05It's just so frustrating, because I was finally starting to feel like a couple again with
01:22:08her, and we actually had a chance of making it work, and it's like I fucking sabotaged it.
01:22:12You did not sabotage it.
01:22:14I did.
01:22:15I did.
01:22:15I knew she'd find out.
01:22:17You know?
01:22:17I had a gut feeling.
01:22:18This kind of shit always comes out, and it's like I did it intentionally.
01:22:23I think you should call her.
01:22:24Tell her what you just told me.
01:22:26Lay it all on the table and apologize.
01:22:28I think she'll be happy to know you completely understand why she was so upset.
01:22:33You know what the worst part is?
01:22:35Even right now, as we discuss this, I'm not sure I even want to be in a relationship.
01:22:40I'm just so fucked up when it comes to this shit.
01:22:43You are not fucked up.
01:22:45You're just scared.
01:22:50Yeah.
01:22:51Come on.
01:22:54I think you need to call her and come clean for your sake.
01:22:57It's not about the consequences.
01:23:00You can't control that.
01:23:01All you can control is your actions.
01:23:03Whatever she does, that's on her.
01:23:07Yeah.
01:23:08Well, all right.
01:23:10I'll call her.
01:23:11Okay, good.
01:23:13And I just got this fucking chicken tattoo with our initials in it.
01:23:16I love you.
01:23:17Not to sound like a jerk, can I point out how excited I am that for once it's me listening to your woes instead of the other way around?
01:23:25I call you so much of my dumbass boy shit, I feel like a broken record.
01:23:29I'm not a broken record.
01:23:31I mean, just meet dumb guys.
01:23:33Not that I've helped disprove that all guys suck, but, you know.
01:23:36Shush, you're great.
01:23:37No, you're great.
01:23:37I'm a fucking jerk.
01:23:38No, you're not.
01:23:40I'm just trying to say I'm happy you asked me for help.
01:23:44Yeah, of course.
01:23:45I love you.
01:23:48You're my best friend.
01:23:49I'll have you back.
01:23:51Go call her?
01:23:53Yeah, all right.
01:23:54It's not going to be that bad.
01:23:55Fine.
01:23:57It's going to be all good.
01:23:59Yeah, we'll see.
01:24:00I just want to say that I understand why you're so upset and I'm really sorry.
01:24:20And I'm not making any excuses, but I need you to know that I got scared and I screwed up.
01:24:28And instead of saying yes, I slept with her.
01:24:31I lied.
01:24:32And if I could change it, I would.
01:24:35But I know that I can't.
01:24:37The thing that bothers me, that concerns me, is that I don't know what else you're lying
01:24:47about.
01:24:49I'm not lying about anything else.
01:24:52How do I know that?
01:24:53I don't know.
01:24:57I mean, you just kind of trust me.
01:24:59I mean, how does anybody know if anyone's telling the truth?
01:25:05Maybe this was a bad idea.
01:25:08Babe, please.
01:25:10Just give me one more chance.
01:25:12You know how I am in relationships and I never thought any could last, but I really think
01:25:16that we could.
01:25:16And I know I sabotaged it and I know I hurt you and I'm a fucking idiot, but please.
01:25:22Just...
01:25:23I know this can work.
01:25:29I don't know.
01:25:32I think maybe we just have too much tainted history.
01:25:36Babe, please.
01:25:37Just ask me anything.
01:25:40I'll tell you everything.
01:25:46Okay.
01:25:52When was the last time you went to a massage parlor?
01:26:07I don't know.
01:26:19If I lose you now, I'm going to go out.
01:26:33If I lose you now, my life will still go on some way, somehow.
01:26:46My breaking point will be the dawn.
01:26:54So don't keep me wondering and waiting for long.
01:26:58Some way, somehow, I will make it on my own.
01:27:11Some way, somehow, I can stand alone.
01:27:17I gave you all of my heart.
01:27:28You kept yours locked up, hidden in the dark.
01:27:35I let go of all of my fears.
01:27:42You hang on to old wounds that brought you to tears.
01:27:49Some way, somehow, I will make it on my own.
01:28:00Some way, somehow, I will carry on.
01:28:07I live, I love, I dream with hope.
01:28:21Beneath the clouds of a holy smoke.
01:28:33And so it stands, I walk alone.
01:28:40My mind is free, my body is strong.
01:28:48I leave you now with the peace of my heart.
01:28:53It's yours to keep, I'll never be far.
01:29:04Some way, somehow, you will make it on your own.
01:29:11Some way, somehow, you can stand alone.
01:29:41One way, somehow, I will Heh, ultimately.
01:30:04See the truth?
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