SARA JAY & KAZUMI EXPOSE ALL THEIR SECRETS INTERVIEW / PODCAST

Podcast Vibe

SARA JAY & KAZUMI EXPOSE ALL THEIR SECRETS INTERVIEW / PODCAST  #SARAJAY #KAZUMI

Transcript

00:00:00And I'm pro-gay. No disrespect to them.

00:00:02But do you understand what it's like, Sarah J?

00:00:05Every boy in the world, and I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy,

00:00:09has faced this traumatic experience where they're masturbating

00:00:12and they're getting there and they're getting there

00:00:16and boom, it cuts to Scotty nails.

00:00:20While you're coming.

00:00:21It's the worst thing ever.

00:00:24Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to

00:00:26Penelty!

00:00:30I can't sing, but welcome to the show, babies.

00:00:35Jerkmay is unbelievable.

00:00:36The greatest digital platform of all time.

00:00:38People that watch the standard good old f***, good for you.

00:00:41But try this.

00:00:43I go on, I fall in love with a new Colombian every single night.

00:00:45I love these girls.

00:00:46I love that human connection.

00:00:48They'll do whatever you want also, mostly.

00:00:50We do a little co- with each other.

00:00:52It's so f***ing amazing.

00:00:53Anyways, it's called Jerkmay.

00:00:55You know what to do.

00:00:56We can hook the boys up.

00:00:58And to get the hookup that we can offer you guys,

00:01:01go to our Instagram page.

00:01:02Go to that little link tree.

00:01:04You're going to be blessed with the magic pot of gold.

00:01:06We love you so much, Jerkmay.

00:01:07We love you so much, Pillow Talk viewers.

00:01:10Let's make a Jerkmay, Pillow Talk viewer baby

00:01:12and have some fun.

00:01:13But before that, we have a banjo episode.

00:01:15So let's get to Pillow Talk.

00:01:17Love you, Jerkmay.

00:01:17Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to your favorite podcast.

00:01:19This is Pillow Talk.

00:01:20I'm your host, Ryan Poundle.

00:01:21The number one adult show in the world.

00:01:23250 million views a month across platforms.

00:01:26I think it's more now.

00:01:27I think it's 300 million views a month.

00:01:29AVM winner.

00:01:30Urban X award by now.

00:01:32I mean, it's in three days from when we filmed.

00:01:34We won.

00:01:35We definitely won.

00:01:36Liam, I have a wedding.

00:01:37August 16th.

00:01:38You got to go pick it up.

00:01:39Do you want to go with them?

00:01:39Are you going to Urban X?

00:01:40Yes.

00:01:41I'm presenting.

00:01:42Oh, you are?

00:01:43Hey.

00:01:44There you go.

00:01:44With who?

00:01:44I don't know yet.

00:01:46But I was supposed to be the host.

00:01:47Oh, yeah.

00:01:47But I couldn't do it.

00:01:48But you're hosting something else.

00:01:50Maybe.

00:01:51I've heard.

00:01:52I've heard.

00:01:52Huge episode today.

00:01:55I don't know when this is officially coming out, but we had to fly this beautiful angel

00:01:59back out.

00:02:00This is the pioneer of pornography from the VHS days.

00:02:05The first girl I have ever seen naked.

00:02:08Actually, I have to say, it was the Superman Eminem music video, and there's a girl that

00:02:13flashed her boobs in it.

00:02:14I jerked off to that, and then I downloaded LimeWire, jerked off to you.

00:02:18That is all my life how it went down.

00:02:20And then Kelly Kapowski from Saved by the Bell, Tiffany Amber Thiessen, got fake tits, and

00:02:25did the fishnet look.

00:02:27Third thing I jerked off to, and then fourth thing I jerked off to, Christina Aguilera,

00:02:31dirty music video.

00:02:32Okay.

00:02:33Big episode today.

00:02:34My best friend in the world.

00:02:37My best friend in Los Angeles, Liam, earmuffs, earmuffs.

00:02:40I love you too.

00:02:41My favorite female to ever walk the face of the planet.

00:02:44She's such a superstar.

00:02:46She is who everyone of the modern day looks up to on how to be successful on social media,

00:02:53how to be successful on OnlyFans, how to build and do more than just shoot porn.

00:02:59Not that there's anything wrong with porn, but she does so much more than it with her

00:03:03brand.

00:03:03She is going to build a multi-billion dollar empire.

00:03:07Everyone knows it.

00:03:08Everyone believes there's no doubters on the greatness of Kazumi.

00:03:13I'm going to come.

00:03:15Fuck.

00:03:16I love you so much.

00:03:18And have you noticed I wear my Kazumi burger all the time?

00:03:21Your Kazumi burger shirt?

00:03:22Yes.

00:03:22And he ate my Kazumi burger.

00:03:24Hey.

00:03:24The real burger.

00:03:25We haven't missed each other's things.

00:03:27We go to each other's events.

00:03:28That's so nice.

00:03:29That's what supportive friends do.

00:03:30That's what friends do.

00:03:31You missed my birthday party this year.

00:03:32No, I was there.

00:03:33Yeah, of course you were.

00:03:34I was there.

00:03:35There's many images of me.

00:03:36Now, this is a very rare guest to have.

00:03:39This, she lives all the way.

00:03:42I'm not going to say because she has stalkers, but she lives very far away.

00:03:45In my dreams.

00:03:46And we had to take her down and beg and beg.

00:03:48And our email threads are 182 emails long, just to confirm it.

00:03:52She is a tough cookie to crack, but I guess we cracked her.

00:03:56So we brought on the OG veteran goat and the modern day superstar.

00:04:02This is going to be a real educational podcast.

00:04:07This is the girl that probably taught Kazumi how to suck a penis.

00:04:11Probably taught Kazumi how to do a lot of things.

00:04:14And the connection backstage, just before we even, you guys are bonding and vibing.

00:04:18Yeah.

00:04:19There's something going on here.

00:04:20And I can't wait to get into this.

00:04:22Let me show you what I know about burning sex.

00:04:25Yeah.

00:04:25Show me.

00:04:26Let's get into it.

00:04:26This is Sarah J.

00:04:30Wow.

00:04:30So the last time, what did you think of that?

00:04:33The last time you were on?

00:04:34It was entertaining.

00:04:35It was eclectic.

00:04:36She's been PR trained.

00:04:38It was performance art.

00:04:40Yeah.

00:04:41Yeah.

00:04:41It was something to bounce off of.

00:04:43You know, I tell every co-host, okay, you're a co-host.

00:04:48The guest is the speaker.

00:04:49We encourage questions.

00:04:51We flow the conversation and we let them speak and we don't interrupt.

00:04:54He interrupted you every fucking sentence.

00:04:57He had questions.

00:04:58He had a lot to say.

00:04:59He asked if he squirt.

00:05:00It was valid.

00:05:02That was a question.

00:05:03He was energetic.

00:05:05Yeah.

00:05:05And you see, that's why.

00:05:08This show, we always do three because one-on-one is way too intimate.

00:05:12Yeah.

00:05:12Three makes it a fun, social, little, you know.

00:05:15Sure.

00:05:15Breaks it up a little bit.

00:05:16I feel like that was sex.

00:05:18Threesomes are my favorite.

00:05:19I hate threesomes.

00:05:20You do?

00:05:20I like even numbers.

00:05:22Kazumi doesn't like threesomes.

00:05:24I love threesomes.

00:05:26They're my favorite.

00:05:26Actually, she likes boy, boy, girl.

00:05:27She doesn't like boy, girl, girl.

00:05:29I like all threesomes.

00:05:30They're my favorite.

00:05:31Absolutely.

00:05:32Because it's really two people having sex and then there's an assistant and then you switch.

00:05:36I have a disease called heterosexuality.

00:05:39So like being with another girl in the room makes me want to.

00:05:42No, I think it's called jello assaddy and you want to kick the other bitch in the face off the bed.

00:05:47No, I don't care what the order is.

00:05:48Have you ever had a girl fuck you really good?

00:05:50No.

00:05:51Sometimes when I get really high.

00:05:52Can we go to a scene together?

00:05:54Oh my god.

00:05:56No, I love having sex with women.

00:05:57Have you guys not?

00:05:58No, we've only had dinner together and a few conversations.

00:06:00What's the Chinese communist party?

00:06:02Oh, shit.

00:06:02You have games, Sarah J.

00:06:04Yeah, no.

00:06:05I love fucking women, but I also love fucking men.

00:06:07And I love helping men and women fuck together.

00:06:10Like I would love to help you guys fuck together.

00:06:12Okay, but the way you said that there's an assistant, would you say that that's the guy?

00:06:16Both.

00:06:17It goes both ways.

00:06:18Yeah, it's totally interchangeable.

00:06:20It's like if she's having sex with a guy, then I'm spitting on her pussy and I'm spitting

00:06:24on his dick and I'm putting them together.

00:06:26Okay, so you're always the leader.

00:06:28I love helping.

00:06:29You're the conductor.

00:06:31Conductor, yes.

00:06:32Conductor.

00:06:32I wish guys would get more gay during a threesome.

00:06:34Like I wish they would make out.

00:06:37Oh, whether it's two guys?

00:06:39Yeah.

00:06:39Like you're going to DP me, but you're not going to make out?

00:06:40Yeah.

00:06:41Because I'll tell you a classic story that all the Pillow Talk viewers know, but I'll

00:06:45tell you the quick version.

00:06:46I dated Alina Lopez last summer.

00:06:48Okay.

00:06:48Slurp alert.

00:06:49And that was, you know, that was some of the most amazing.

00:06:52Remember I said you can learn more in three months with someone than Alina.

00:06:56Hey.

00:06:57She taught me 80% of what I know.

00:06:59That's great.

00:07:00Wow.

00:07:00She's great.

00:07:01Shout out to Alina.

00:07:02Hottest girl ever.

00:07:03And we're friends again.

00:07:04So hot.

00:07:04Oh, that's great.

00:07:05We had a threesome after one of my comedy shows.

00:07:08Oopsie.

00:07:09You were one of the hosts that night.

00:07:10Yeah.

00:07:11Do a little secret.

00:07:12And we'd love to have you host one night.

00:07:13And we go home with this girl, Brittany Lowe, this little Asian girl.

00:07:16And she just keeps coming to me, Daddy.

00:07:18I'm going to count you down 10, 9.

00:07:20She gave me a J-O-Y in her.

00:07:22That's hot.

00:07:23So I did.

00:07:24Like off camera.

00:07:25That's fucking hot.

00:07:26Right.

00:07:26Yeah.

00:07:27A high count down.

00:07:29Right.

00:07:30Which, by the way, I've never seen.

00:07:31I might have to pull that out of my bag next time.

00:07:34I've never seen him porn.

00:07:36She invented this shit.

00:07:37That's Asian representation.

00:07:39Yeah.

00:07:39And isn't she the same country?

00:07:42She is from China.

00:07:43No, she's not Chinese.

00:07:44She's Chinese.

00:07:45Okay.

00:07:45Well, anyways.

00:07:46Anyway.

00:07:47She gives me this countdown.

00:07:49Yeah.

00:07:49I'm fingering Alina.

00:07:52But I cream pie Alina.

00:07:54That's hot.

00:07:54And as soon as I cream pie the girl, Alina gets up, walks away, and texts me.

00:07:59It's over.

00:08:00She dumped me.

00:08:01And everyone says to me, you don't cream pie because we were dating.

00:08:06You don't cream pie the other girl.

00:08:07You can't cream pie the assistant.

00:08:08Right.

00:08:09Oh.

00:08:10Because she was the, what's the word?

00:08:12Unicorn.

00:08:13Yeah.

00:08:14She was the unicorn.

00:08:14The assistant.

00:08:15Party fellow.

00:08:15She was the assistant.

00:08:16She just said the assistant.

00:08:18Yeah.

00:08:18So I cream pie the assistant and Alina.

00:08:21That wasn't it.

00:08:22That wasn't it.

00:08:23I've told the story to 600 people.

00:08:26599 agreed with her.

00:08:28My dad agreed with me.

00:08:30I think I would have, like, had to eat it out of her.

00:08:33That's what you, you wouldn't have dumped me, right?

00:08:35She's a team player.

00:08:35No, no.

00:08:37I mean, we might have had, like, a little conversation afterwards.

00:08:39But, like, yeah, I would have just kept going with the scenario.

00:08:42I would have torn you limb from limb.

00:08:44No, I would have.

00:08:44You would have torn me limb from limb.

00:08:45I may have eaten it out of her and, like, made out with her.

00:08:48Like, yeah.

00:08:49So what are the rules in a threesome with your partner?

00:08:52You gotta talk about it first.

00:08:54Okay, but the unwritten ones.

00:08:55Let's start with Kazumi.

00:08:56Okay.

00:08:57Because I think you're more chill.

00:08:58I'm super chill.

00:08:59And I know she has rules.

00:09:01Yeah, I have very little rules.

00:09:01Because she's had partners that shot, and I already know some of her rules.

00:09:05No cream pies.

00:09:06Yeah.

00:09:06No holding hands.

00:09:07Well, if we're not dating, then you can cream pie everyone.

00:09:10No fucking off cam.

00:09:10No watching a show together.

00:09:11Right.

00:09:12You can watch a show together now.

00:09:13Yeah.

00:09:14Now?

00:09:14Like, we should.

00:09:15I know that was one of your old rules, that you can't watch Succession together.

00:09:18I think we can watch Succession together.

00:09:20I don't like that.

00:09:21We should send each other IG memes.

00:09:23Like, alone?

00:09:24Yes, alone.

00:09:24After they fuck.

00:09:26Or, like, all three of us.

00:09:27No, no, no.

00:09:27Alone.

00:09:28Why are we doing that, though?

00:09:30Okay.

00:09:30I got...

00:09:31My brain went towards open relationships.

00:09:32I'm sorry.

00:09:33Yeah, no.

00:09:33Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:09:34Yeah, threesome rules only.

00:09:35Sorry.

00:09:35Threesome rules.

00:09:36Okay.

00:09:37Sorry.

00:09:37He's from Canada.

00:09:38Sorry.

00:09:39I...

00:09:40If we're dating, no surprise.

00:09:42But if we're not dating, shoot up a club.

00:09:44I don't care.

00:09:45Okay.

00:09:45What?

00:09:46That's not my problem.

00:09:47What about making out longer than 20 seconds?

00:09:50Yeah, that's cool.

00:09:52If we're not dating...

00:09:52Some girls don't like...

00:09:53That's a rule for some.

00:09:55Yeah, I just want to be involved.

00:09:57Like, my thing is, like, I just want to be involved.

00:09:59Like, it's, like, never two of you.

00:10:01It's all three of us.

00:10:03Oh.

00:10:03Yeah.

00:10:03One rule for threesomes for me is they both have to have big dicks.

00:10:06No, no, no, no.

00:10:07That is not a threesome.

00:10:09That is a threesome.

00:10:10What is that?

00:10:11It's two dicks, one vagina?

00:10:11Look, they need to be named different things.

00:10:13Because I hate when people ask...

00:10:15Two girls, two girls.

00:10:16BBG?

00:10:17BBG.

00:10:18BBG.

00:10:19Threesome is two girls and...

00:10:22BBG.

00:10:23Gangbang, almost.

00:10:24No, it's not.

00:10:25Because that is a lot more.

00:10:26Okay.

00:10:26That's the poor doctor.

00:10:27Okay, so what do you...

00:10:28What's the...

00:10:29What's...

00:10:29Give us a few terms for two guys, one girl.

00:10:32BBG.

00:10:33Eiffel Tower.

00:10:34Okay.

00:10:34Took her to Paris.

00:10:35Heaven.

00:10:36Chinese finger trap.

00:10:38Chinese finger trap.

00:10:39That's racist.

00:10:39Okay, Chinese finger trap.

00:10:41Yeah, that's a good one.

00:10:42That's my pussy.

00:10:43They're such different experiences...

00:10:45Yes, they are.

00:10:45...that I hate that the word threesome falls under both.

00:10:48I agree.

00:10:49Can we come up with a new word?

00:10:50Let's...

00:10:51I think we're cool enough...

00:10:53Yeah.

00:10:53...to pioneer it.

00:10:54Yeah.

00:10:55A slice of pie.

00:10:57Because it's...

00:10:58That's what it feels like.

00:10:59One pie.

00:11:00Two sticks, one cup.

00:11:02I like where you're going.

00:11:03Two dicks, one cup.

00:11:04I was on the same...

00:11:05There's actually three cups, if you imagine all three of my holes.

00:11:09Okay.

00:11:10Well, I was thinking of you as the vessel.

00:11:11I'm the vessel.

00:11:12Two dicks, one cup.

00:11:13You know what I think?

00:11:14I think all threesomes should have 2d or 2v in front of it.

00:11:20Oh.

00:11:202d...

00:11:21I had a 2d threesome.

00:11:22Right?

00:11:23I had a 2d threesome.

00:11:24I like that.

00:11:24Right?

00:11:25You have to clarify.

00:11:262d and a 2c choppy?

00:11:272d or 2g.

00:11:27It's like a DP and a DV.

00:11:29You have to very much clarify that.

00:11:31Because I've done DV, but I don't do DP.

00:11:34Really?

00:11:35Yeah, I don't do anal.

00:11:36By the way, you know those terms aren't known to normies?

00:11:39I get DP'd once a week.

00:11:41No one knows what DP means, really.

00:11:42I don't do anal ever.

00:11:44No anal ever.

00:11:45Sarah J, that is very shocking.

00:11:46But I will do double vag.

00:11:47Also very shocking.

00:11:49I feel like double vag.

00:11:51So you've never done anal on camera ever?

00:11:54How come?

00:11:55Because I don't like poop.

00:11:57But have you done anal off camera?

00:11:58You know what?

00:11:59Yeah.

00:12:00I don't really like poop.

00:12:01Sarah J, no one gives a fuck.

00:12:03Yeah, I do.

00:12:04I'm the one who gives a fuck.

00:12:05Yeah, but you give a fuck because you think they give a fuck.

00:12:08No, no, no.

00:12:08I give a fuck because I give a fuck because I don't like poop.

00:12:12I'm the one who doesn't like poop.

00:12:13I don't care if you like poop or not.

00:12:14I don't like poop.

00:12:16But what if you cleaned out so you were poopless?

00:12:18Then I have to deal with the poop beforehand.

00:12:20Whenever I get a colonic, I always record the poop floating away.

00:12:23Yeah, no.

00:12:23I don't want to even think about it.

00:12:24I don't like poop at all.

00:12:26I want to be so away from poop.

00:12:28You know, Kazumi was this Mrs.

00:12:31I'll never do anal.

00:12:32Fuck it.

00:12:33You know, I'm Kazumi.

00:12:33I don't need anal.

00:12:34Kazumi's skirts was her name at the time.

00:12:37And then one day, anal.

00:12:38What happened?

00:12:39My third eye was awakened and so was my whole.

00:12:42And now she won't shut up about anal.

00:12:44She's like, it's like she joined Scientology, this girl.

00:12:47It's her personality.

00:12:48I fucking love anal.

00:12:49Yeah.

00:12:50I like it more than pussy sex.

00:12:51I get it.

00:12:51Completely.

00:12:52She also credits anal for her diet.

00:12:55That's what I'm saying.

00:12:55Yeah.

00:12:56Yeah.

00:12:56I get that too.

00:12:57I understand.

00:12:58Because, you know, you can't really think.

00:12:59That's why I'm thick.

00:13:01You're not.

00:13:02Well, in a good way, thick.

00:13:03Yeah.

00:13:03I'm thick because I, I, no.

00:13:06You're, you're.

00:13:06Tongue.

00:13:07Tongue.

00:13:07Sarah J, you're thick.

00:13:09Thick.

00:13:10Because I don't watch what I eat and I don't take days off eating because I don't do anal.

00:13:15She lives her life.

00:13:16Fair enough.

00:13:17I eat right before a scene.

00:13:19I could care less.

00:13:19Okay.

00:13:20How about with a partner?

00:13:21Like you were married.

00:13:22Yeah.

00:13:22Or maybe this new fisherman guy.

00:13:25Are they getting the Sarah J booty?

00:13:27No.

00:13:27I mean, my, my ex-husband, we did it a couple of times and I just don't really like it.

00:13:31Like the thought of poop, like even cleaning out beforehand.

00:13:35And I'm like, oh my God, I hate this part.

00:13:38Oh yeah.

00:13:39Like, no poop, no poop.

00:13:40Liam enemas like three times a day like he flosses after a meal.

00:13:43Yeah, no, I'm glad.

00:13:45You know, I have my, the other, they're, they're right next to each other.

00:13:47A French fry and they'll just enema.

00:13:49They're so close to each other.

00:13:50You could just hit the other one and it's already clean and ready.

00:13:53What's that place called, by the way?

00:13:54Taint.

00:13:55With the P.

00:13:56Hmm?

00:13:56Taint?

00:13:57With the P.

00:13:58What?

00:13:59What are you talking about?

00:13:59Pussy?

00:14:01Panera.

00:14:02Perinarium.

00:14:03Panerium or some shit like that.

00:14:05Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:14:05I don't know.

00:14:06It's taint.

00:14:07But yeah, they're so close together.

00:14:09T-A-I-N-T?

00:14:09No, perineum.

00:14:10Oh no.

00:14:11P-E-R-I-N-U-M.

00:14:13I think it's P-E-R-I-N-U-M.

00:14:15Perineum.

00:14:16No, that's wrong.

00:14:16So what are you saying?

00:14:17They're so close together that.

00:14:19They're so close together.

00:14:20One's already clean.

00:14:20I don't even have to prepare.

00:14:21Just stick it in whenever you want.

00:14:23So can we clarify one thing, Sarah J?

00:14:25Every girl likes a different amount of pressure.

00:14:27Yeah.

00:14:27A different.

00:14:27You have to pay attention.

00:14:28That's the magic.

00:14:29I like, I like my clit rub diagonally.

00:14:30I'm so insecure about my clit play.

00:14:33I like my clit rub diagonally, and I like it kind of firm.

00:14:36And you're probably opposite.

00:14:38Maybe.

00:14:38You understand?

00:14:39Every guy in the world likes this.

00:14:43Every girl's like, oh, I'd like you to do backflips while you touch it.

00:14:47Every girl's got a whole different kit and caboodle.

00:14:50I'm just like, oh, thanks, man.

00:14:52That's nice.

00:14:53Yeah, I feel like you're such a giver.

00:14:57But I'm really dominant in bed.

00:14:59I don't know if you noticed.

00:15:00I know, it's scary.

00:15:01I'll ride a guy's face.

00:15:02Well, Sarah J is, too, a little bit.

00:15:03I don't care.

00:15:05I'm a giver, but I'm also dominant.

00:15:07But I feel like, don't take this offensively, but I feel like you're really focused on getting off yourself.

00:15:15I'm going to come.

00:15:16Yeah.

00:15:17Oh, like.

00:15:17You're saying that from her vibe today?

00:15:19No, no, no, like her vibe all the time.

00:15:21And like, she's very, very horny.

00:15:23And she's like, no, I'm going to get off on your fucking dick.

00:15:26That's the vibe I get from you.

00:15:28Ryan knows this because he directed his first ever porn.

00:15:30Hey.

00:15:31This is a big deal.

00:15:32Yeah.

00:15:33Very big deal.

00:15:33Hey.

00:15:34I talk so much shit about porn directors.

00:15:37Not in a bad way.

00:15:38I just mentioned that porn has evolved.

00:15:41Talent has evolved.

00:15:43Scenes have evolved.

00:15:44Cameras have evolved.

00:15:46Lighting, sets, everything has evolved.

00:15:48Directors are still shooting the exact same style.

00:15:50And they don't read comments or listen to fans.

00:15:53He leaves comments.

00:15:54Because respectfully, no offense, they don't really get fans the way Michael Bay does.

00:16:00No one really DMs porn directors.

00:16:01You know, it's kind of true.

00:16:03So they don't know shit.

00:16:05They've just been doing the same thing since 1988, since they started directing.

00:16:09Guess what?

00:16:10We have something to say, fans.

00:16:13Yeah.

00:16:13So I've been addressing it to the camera, hoping that maybe it'll get to my boy, Pat

00:16:18Mine, or my boy, Chris, or my boy, you know.

00:16:21I'm like after it.

00:16:22Pat Mine.

00:16:23You know what I mean?

00:16:25I'm hoping that they listen.

00:16:27Hey, guess what?

00:16:27Over the last 50 years, dudes have changed what they like.

00:16:31And I have like a list of 12 things.

00:16:34Give me at least one thing that you think has changed.

00:16:37Okay.

00:16:37Well, first of all, they used to try to make it dude, girl, dude, girl.

00:16:43That is so out.

00:16:45If there's sites for girls to masturbate to, I get that.

00:16:48Or gays.

00:16:49That's fine.

00:16:50But that should be a different scene.

00:16:52No straight male jerking off to Kazumi or Sarah J ever wants a full frame cut to the guy's face.

00:16:58Okay.

00:16:58So here's the thing.

00:16:59Because I am also producer and director as well.

00:17:02We're not just trying to get the straight males.

00:17:04We're trying to get all of the males.

00:17:05You heard what I just said.

00:17:06I said there should be different scenes for that.

00:17:08But the thing is, is why?

00:17:09Why not get all the fucking fans for one?

00:17:12I'll tell you why, Sarah J.

00:17:13I'll tell you why.

00:17:14Because his wiener went down a little.

00:17:15Because the thing is, it's like I go into gay bars and they're like, oh my God, Sarah J is here.

00:17:20Oh my God, Sarah J.

00:17:21Do you think they're jerking off to me?

00:17:23No, they're jerking off to the guys I work with.

00:17:26Thank you, gang.

00:17:26So one scene gets a bigger fan base.

00:17:29You see what I'm saying?

00:17:30I understand.

00:17:30That is a great point.

00:17:32But it's such an L for us to take for the gay man to get a W.

00:17:39And I'm pro-gay.

00:17:40No disrespect to them.

00:17:41But do you understand what it's like, Sarah J?

00:17:45Every boy in the world, and I wouldn't wish this had my worst enemy, has faced this traumatic experience where they're masturbating.

00:17:51And they're getting there, and they're getting there, and boom, it cuts to Scotty Nails.

00:17:58And ahhh!

00:17:59While you're coming.

00:18:01It's the worst thing ever.

00:18:03It makes you want to only watch solos for like six years.

00:18:06I feel like newer porn is even more so like that because the younger generation is so fluid.

00:18:11And so now that they're so fluid, we even see man-ass, which like up until maybe 2000, say 18, we didn't even see man-ass ever.

00:18:22Now we see man-ass and man-butt-hole because everybody's watching.

00:18:27There's a lot of bi guys out there.

00:18:27Thank you for bringing it up, Sarah J.

00:18:28That's my number two thing that needs to be removed from all scenes.

00:18:32Man, we're eradicated.

00:18:33Why the fuck are they filming Doggy from behind the guy's ass?

00:18:38Because there's a lot of gay guys watching this.

00:18:40I'll be honest.

00:18:41So it's confirmed straights would hate it.

00:18:44The gay guys are spending a little bit more money.

00:18:46No, I am an ally.

00:18:47They need to have a second videographer filming it for the gays.

00:18:52That's what needs to be done.

00:18:53They need two edits.

00:18:54Two edits.

00:18:55Yes.

00:18:55You feel like they need two edits.

00:18:57Exactly.

00:18:58One gay guy with a straight one?

00:18:59I got you.

00:18:59Two edits.

00:19:00I got you.

00:19:00I really do think two.

00:19:01I'm not against that.

00:19:03I'm not against that.

00:19:03A second videographer.

00:19:04It's just like, you know, the money doesn't justify that.

00:19:07But yeah, I get what you're saying.

00:19:09Right?

00:19:09Yeah, I get it.

00:19:10You know, like...

00:19:11But I do have a lot of gay fans that are like, oh my God, I love all the guys you fuck.

00:19:16Great taste.

00:19:17Great taste.

00:19:18I'll give an example.

00:19:19You fuck the best ones.

00:19:20When I was a kid, my parents took out the parts of Lion King with the violence where they

00:19:25killed Scar and Scar killed the...

00:19:26They changed the ending.

00:19:28Oh, my mom did that with Flashdance.

00:19:29Okay.

00:19:30They need to do that for...

00:19:31They need to do that for the gays of porn.

00:19:34Right.

00:19:35I get it.

00:19:36Adjust the ending.

00:19:38Yeah.

00:19:38Like, look, there's his booty.

00:19:40Yep.

00:19:40So that's my next one.

00:19:42I get it.

00:19:42Guys need to shut the fuck up.

00:19:44Yeah.

00:19:44There's a lot of guy talk.

00:19:45False.

00:19:46I like the guy dirty talk.

00:19:47That's for me.

00:19:48You do like it?

00:19:49My representation?

00:19:49I feel like there's like 30% of the population that likes the guy dirty talk, either are entertained

00:19:54by it or turned on by it.

00:19:56I don't think any straight dudes are.

00:19:58No, there's some straight dudes that think it's funny.

00:20:00Funny?

00:20:01Yeah.

00:20:01They think it's funny.

00:20:02And like, I remember back in the day, of course, I'm old as fucking dirt, but Wesley

00:20:06Pipes...

00:20:06Don't say that, Serge.

00:20:07It's okay.

00:20:07You look unbelievable.

00:20:08And it's such an honor to have you here.

00:20:10No, you're 25.

00:20:10No, it feels wonderful.

00:20:12I love it.

00:20:12I'm not even mad at it.

00:20:13How cool is she?

00:20:14But Wesley Pipes used to talk so much shit, and you would get like 70% of guys

00:20:19that would be like, tell that motherfucker to shut the fuck up.

00:20:21And then you would get like 30% of the guys that would be like, oh my God, he's so funny.

00:20:25Funny?

00:20:25Yeah.

00:20:26Yeah, but that's not...

00:20:27It keeps you watching, though.

00:20:29He needs to stay focused on his boner.

00:20:31He's streamlining his mission.

00:20:33You know what I really got into recently, but I had to throw it out because I got too

00:20:36addicted, was the VR porn.

00:20:38You shot a bit of VR, right?

00:20:39Of course.

00:20:39Yeah, you did Badoink.

00:20:41Yeah, I did VR Bangers.

00:20:43You did VR Bangers.

00:20:44And I did some stuff for Naughty America.

00:20:44Don't tell me one more.

00:20:45There's one more you did.

00:20:46I did a lot of stuff for Naughty America.

00:20:48Yeah, there's one more.

00:20:49I've never done VR.

00:20:50Yeah?

00:20:51Fuck.

00:20:51I like getting fucked.

00:20:52There's a fourth one you did, Sarah J.

00:20:54Yeah.

00:20:54It's too much work for me.

00:20:55There's a fourth one.

00:20:55I probably did a few.

00:20:57Yeah.

00:20:57I don't even remember myself, so don't worry about remembering.

00:20:59I went through a big VR phase.

00:21:00I had to throw it out.

00:21:01It ruined my life.

00:21:02I would edge myself.

00:21:03I loved it so much.

00:21:05And I'm sad I didn't pick up.

00:21:06Why do you feel like it ruined your life?

00:21:07Because I would, you know, go to bed...

00:21:09You enjoyed it too much?

00:21:10Yeah, exactly.

00:21:11It makes me nauseous.

00:21:12I vomit.

00:21:13There's the spatial thing.

00:21:15I go to bed at 12.30 and usually I kick off for 50 minutes.

00:21:17I'm asleep by one.

00:21:19Real gooner.

00:21:20But with the VR, I would edge and be like, no, I could come up with something better.

00:21:26Oh, no, this is too good.

00:21:27You know, not something better.

00:21:29I don't mean like that.

00:21:29Right.

00:21:30Like a better part.

00:21:31Like this isn't the best part yet.

00:21:33Yeah.

00:21:35Yeah.

00:21:35I take my Oculus off.

00:21:36It's 5.45 a.m.

00:21:38Same with my job machine from Autoblow.

00:21:40Yeah.

00:21:41And that's not a plug because they dropped our sponsorship after two weeks, but they did

00:21:44send me a machine.

00:21:45And the machine was pretty decent.

00:21:46Like if you close your eyes, it would feel like a woman who loved you or better.

00:21:51Yes.

00:21:51Or maybe better.

00:21:52Better because no breaks.

00:21:55Yeah.

00:21:55You know, girls want breaks and shit.

00:21:57You know what's crazy is like in sex, like a guy could bring out a vibrator or a dildo

00:22:01for me.

00:22:02I'm like, yeah.

00:22:02But if I bring out a flashlight for a dude, I feel like he'd be like, whoa.

00:22:05That is weird.

00:22:06Yeah.

00:22:06Like I should be able to talk sleeve you up.

00:22:09I've done that in a few scenes.

00:22:10Actually, I've also done that in personal life, like those eggs, you know, the like stretchy

00:22:13rubber eggs.

00:22:14Yeah.

00:22:15So like I have like sessions with friends, you know, that go long and I'm like, sometimes

00:22:20my mouth gets tired and I'm like, yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:22:23And then I might like start sucking on your neck or something while I'm jerking you off.

00:22:26I wonder if you do that in the corner or with your partners?

00:22:28No, with my partners.

00:22:29Oh.

00:22:30Yeah.

00:22:31Very nice.

00:22:32I like those eggs a lot.

00:22:33Those eggs.

00:22:34The eggs are cool.

00:22:34You know what I'm talking about?

00:22:35They make my dick feel big because they don't go that long.

00:22:37The only thing that pisses me off is they're disposable.

00:22:38I'm like, I want them to keep working, but you kind of have to talk to others.

00:22:41And they only go really halfway through the dick?

00:22:43I mean, they're super stretchy, so you can kind of go all the way down, but then they're

00:22:47like really not useless after that.

00:22:49They're super stretched out.

00:22:51Yeah.

00:22:51So toys in the bedroom.

00:22:53I was always against it.

00:22:55I always thought as a loser Canadian, dumb.

00:22:59I thought, oh, that's when you lose the spark.

00:23:02Babe, we don't need that.

00:23:03We've only been dating two years.

00:23:05Now with my new girl, we're only a month and a half in.

00:23:07Yeah.

00:23:08We fucking bought out all of Hustler Hollywood.

00:23:10Yeah.

00:23:11I do too.

00:23:11I love it.

00:23:12I'm loving it.

00:23:13Yeah.

00:23:13And also like I will drop toys on my guy when I'm not around.

00:23:18It's like, here, use these.

00:23:19I'll be back later.

00:23:20Oh, that's hot.

00:23:22I love when a guy's closet looks like Jeffrey Dahmer, like butts, boobs, holes.

00:23:26I like it.

00:23:27Take it.

00:23:27Hey, can you guys recommend some toys that normies should try with their partners?

00:23:33Kazumi Fleshlight.

00:23:34I had one, but I got discontinued.

00:23:36No.

00:23:37Why?

00:23:38Because it was old.

00:23:39But like, I really like those eggs.

00:23:41You were one of the first Fleshlight girls of all time.

00:23:42AVN Hall of Famer 2017, baby girl.

00:23:46Kazumi, what is your, for Fansly, you're on Fansly, right?

00:23:49Hey, yeah.

00:23:50We all love Fansly.

00:23:51Shout out Leah Coons.

00:23:52Shout out Liam Riley.

00:23:53What is your strangest custom request?

00:23:55I don't do customs, remember?

00:23:57Because they were always racist?

00:23:58No, but what would be the request if they wasn't racist?

00:24:01Why is that funny?

00:24:02If they weren't racist?

00:24:03And also, you don't have to have done it.

00:24:05You just got a request of it.

00:24:07I just stopped taking customs.

00:24:08I never get a custom request.

00:24:09Sorry.

00:24:10I take very little anymore, too.

00:24:12Yeah.

00:24:12Like, yeah.

00:24:13They're always mega complicated with like 17 different angles and like weird things.

00:24:16They're very specific, aren't they?

00:24:17Yeah, I got two today that were the exact same one request and I was like.

00:24:22Oh, you made two accounts?

00:24:23No, two by maybe, but I don't think so.

00:24:26Or maybe the Friends.

00:24:27It was like different dialogue, but like the same basic thing and I was like.

00:24:32What was it?

00:24:32So, they wanted me to be possessed by a man and I am now a man inside my body.

00:24:40Wow.

00:24:41And I am appreciating my breasts and my feet.

00:24:46That's really specific.

00:24:47It is, right?

00:24:48And I'm like, I don't know if I'm that good of an actress.

00:24:53I was the one who wrote that.

00:24:54Like a Freaky Friday situation with like a man.

00:24:57You declined that?

00:24:58That one seems fun.

00:24:59That's Liam every day.

00:25:00You know what?

00:25:01It's in my gray zone.

00:25:02I'll be honest.

00:25:03It's in my gray zone because I don't know if I really want to act that out.

00:25:06Yeah.

00:25:07It's like, would you get an Oscar for that?

00:25:08I would have to really like, I have to really think about it.

00:25:12Even though you guys have all this on the internet and you really don't give a fuck.

00:25:16Some customs that you must be like, fuck out.

00:25:18This one doesn't get out.

00:25:19Right?

00:25:20Like dumping out like little soldiers and stepping on them.

00:25:23The pie one.

00:25:24Right.

00:25:24Yeah.

00:25:24The pie one.

00:25:25I'm like, oh my God.

00:25:26Please don't let anybody else see this.

00:25:28Yeah.

00:25:29No.

00:25:29Like, and then the end of the pie one is I had to be put in a cage and pied.

00:25:33And I did it because I've never been pied before.

00:25:35And I was like, let's just do it once and see what's happening.

00:25:38You know?

00:25:39And I did it.

00:25:40And I was like, please, dear God, nobody ever see.

00:25:42I'm just like a mess.

00:25:44Like, I'm just like covered in.

00:25:45I love splashing though.

00:25:47Yeah.

00:25:48Like it was, it was one of those things where I, just like you said, like, I really don't

00:25:51want anybody else to see this.

00:25:52This is for your eyes only, sir.

00:25:55Mr. Custom guy.

00:25:56Yeah.

00:25:57Yeah.

00:25:58Sarah J.

00:25:58Are you always like, there's always like a 30% chance you might give a job.

00:26:03Yeah.

00:26:04That sounds exactly right.

00:26:06Sarah J.

00:26:06I have a question.

00:26:07Um, I'm looking for a husband, but I want to give him an insane head.

00:26:11Help.

00:26:11You wait, you're looking for a husband, insane head.

00:26:13What was the worst?

00:26:14I want to give them the most insane head of your life.

00:26:15Wait, wait, wait.

00:26:16Sarah J.

00:26:16Hold on.

00:26:17On that subject quick though.

00:26:19Where's the most random job?

00:26:21Church.

00:26:22Grocery store.

00:26:24What do you mean?

00:26:24To completion?

00:26:25Grocery store.

00:26:26Yeah.

00:26:26But wait, wait, with someone that you pulled up with to the grocery store?

00:26:29So, uh, in the grocery, in the grocery store, we both worked at the grocery store.

00:26:33I was 18 and he also worked at the grocery store and the power went out and it was one

00:26:38of these places that had no windows and electric doors.

00:26:41And so nobody was allowed out of the building.

00:26:43Was it public?

00:26:43No, it was, it was like a one-off.

00:26:45It's like a boutique grocery store.

00:26:47So like the whole thing, like got really dark and I took a little flashlight and I went and

00:26:52found him and we did it in the dark, dark.

00:26:54Yeah.

00:26:54And we did it in the cereal aisle.

00:26:56First link?

00:26:57First link?

00:26:59No, we'd done it before.

00:26:59Okay.

00:27:00You know what?

00:27:00I was like, I was like, I was like, we didn't text, but I think I called him on the

00:27:05respectfully, very cool.

00:27:07On the grocery store phone.

00:27:08I was like, Hey, where are you at?

00:27:09I'm coming to meet you in the cereal aisle.

00:27:11Yeah.

00:27:12Cause it was pre-cellphone days.

00:27:13Way pre-cellphone days.

00:27:14That's hot.

00:27:14Yeah.

00:27:14Meet me in the cereal aisle.

00:27:15I called the stop room and I was like, meet me in the cereal aisle.

00:27:19But Sarah J.

00:27:19Tell us about like the randomness.

00:27:22You just like sucked a dick.

00:27:23Like I've never just given a head to a guy.

00:27:25You said like nine words to him.

00:27:27Yeah.

00:27:27Okay.

00:27:28Tell us some of those stories.

00:27:29Many, many times.

00:27:30Like normal people.

00:27:32Yeah.

00:27:32Okay.

00:27:32So like I have a girlfriend and she had recently got a boyfriend.

00:27:37And so she gave me her whole black book.

00:27:39Girlfriend, meaning you were female friends, just a female friend.

00:27:42Got it.

00:27:43And so she was like, I just got a boyfriend.

00:27:44And so all the guys I'm fucking, I'm going to pass on to you.

00:27:46And I was like, fantastic.

00:27:48Love that.

00:27:48Because we were compatible.

00:27:50So she sent this guy to my door.

00:27:52He, I answered the door.

00:27:54What?

00:27:54You guys were sharing dudes?

00:27:55Well, she sent them all to me because she had a new boyfriend and she was like, yeah,

00:28:00I got to get rid of.

00:28:01She had a whole big roster and she was like, just go fuck Sarah.

00:28:04Yeah, exactly.

00:28:05Because.

00:28:05What a gift.

00:28:07Imagine a fucking gift.

00:28:08Who's the girl?

00:28:08To be honest, to this day, I'm so thankful for her.

00:28:12She's a star of Cinnamon Love.

00:28:14Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:28:14Yeah.

00:28:15Okay.

00:28:15So Cinnamon Love gave me her roster.

00:28:17I'm very thankful for that because they were all top quality men.

00:28:21And this one particular man came, knocked on my door and I opened the door.

00:28:26And before we got past the welcome rug, I dropped his pants and started sucking his

00:28:31dick.

00:28:31Wow.

00:28:31Been there.

00:28:32Yeah, it was wonderful.

00:28:34It was wonderful.

00:28:34Did you cut any from the roster or all passed?

00:28:37You know what?

00:28:38I fucked everybody at least once.

00:28:40And some of them, like we got along with like so well that like, you know, they like

00:28:45cream rises to the top kind of thing, you know?

00:28:47Ooh, there's a hierarchy of the roster.

00:28:48Yeah, just because of personalities and availability and stuff.

00:28:52Yeah.

00:28:53I wonder if they have a little group shot.

00:28:54She gave me at least like, no, they don't.

00:28:56She gave me because I would know if they talked.

00:28:59She gave me at least like eight guys.

00:29:03Eight.

00:29:04That's a good spread.

00:29:04I do that too because she was amazing.

00:29:07My friends are suckers and I'm a fucker.

00:29:09So they'll suck and I'll fuck.

00:29:11Yeah.

00:29:11So her and I were very similar like sexually.

00:29:14And so, yeah, she just passed me all her roster and that they took care of me for the

00:29:19next like 10, 15 years.

00:29:21She's still with this.

00:29:22Is she still with this boyfriend?

00:29:23No.

00:29:23Did she come back for your roster when they broke up?

00:29:27Nope.

00:29:28She just gave you a roster?

00:29:29A friend should do it when they get married.

00:29:30Dude, you got to buy her like a hot tub or something.

00:29:32You know what?

00:29:34It's funny because like I think about her frequently and like how thankful I am to her

00:29:39for like just passing them all off to me.

00:29:42Wow.

00:29:43Yeah.

00:29:43You know, the way you just said that.

00:29:45She might double back.

00:29:46She might hit him.

00:29:47I wouldn't know.

00:29:47She could double dip, triple dip.

00:29:48Yeah, she could.

00:29:48Like, I mean, it's been 15 years or so.

00:29:51Like she could.

00:29:51I don't know.

00:29:52Hey, what do you guys think about this?

00:29:53Okay.

00:29:55I find in Canada, people have such respect for, okay, you dated her.

00:29:59I'm not going to touch her or you like her.

00:30:01I'm not going to touch her.

00:30:02The world is too small.

00:30:02I have to pass it on.

00:30:04Okay.

00:30:04Right.

00:30:05So let's say I date a girl for a year.

00:30:07Yeah.

00:30:07If we fucked her.

00:30:08I dump her.

00:30:09Yeah.

00:30:10I break up with her.

00:30:11We're fucking her.

00:30:12You're my best friend.

00:30:13You're a guy.

00:30:14How long do you have to wait?

00:30:15Do you have to tell me?

00:30:17What's the rules?

00:30:17I need to know.

00:30:18Like, I need to know with you.

00:30:20I'm like, is it cool if I tag that?

00:30:21You check in with me.

00:30:22Yeah.

00:30:23Can I tag that?

00:30:24And then am I a dickhead if I say no?

00:30:27I mean, no, it's just, it is what it is.

00:30:28I dumped her.

00:30:29That's fine.

00:30:30I mean, okay.

00:30:31Because look, the way my parents raised me, Tom Poundell, says, Ryan.

00:30:35Sexy.

00:30:35It's all good, baby.

00:30:37What?

00:30:37You own your ex the rest of your life?

00:30:38Don't you want her to be with someone you love instead of some asshole that could hurt her?

00:30:42That's how I was raised.

00:30:43That's the way I think about it too.

00:30:45Right.

00:30:45But then all these.

00:30:46Like, I would rather pass somebody on to somebody who could use.

00:30:48Like cinnamon love.

00:30:49Right.

00:30:50I would rather pass somebody on to somebody who could use them.

00:30:52Right.

00:30:53But so many people, I would say 90% of people in the world, as soon as they date someone,

00:30:58even if it's their ex of 10 years ago.

00:31:00Yeah.

00:31:00Anyone that they're even acquaintances with can't even look at them.

00:31:04You know, I had a boyfriend for a year and about three years after we split up, I was

00:31:10talking to one of my girlfriends and she was like, yeah, he was decent.

00:31:13I was like, oh yeah.

00:31:15She was like, yeah.

00:31:16After you guys broke up, I fucked him.

00:31:17I was like, oh, okay.

00:31:18Okay.

00:31:18But see, that's beef a little.

00:31:21No, it's fine.

00:31:21Because she could have asked.

00:31:23She could have, but I didn't need to be asked.

00:31:24It was fine.

00:31:25And her and I, we had that rapport where she knew I didn't need to be asked.

00:31:28When I like a guy, I share him.

00:31:31For sure.

00:31:31Yeah, you do do that.

00:31:32I share his contact.

00:31:33You refer him.

00:31:34Yeah.

00:31:34Because my friends have to try it out and I don't want to feel like I'm stupid.

00:31:37Like if they're like, that was whack.

00:31:39Like, would you want to give your friends whack dick?

00:31:41I would not have to object to that.

00:31:42Absolutely not.

00:31:42Right.

00:31:43Because if you gave your friends whack dick, that would be a shine on you.

00:31:47Yeah.

00:31:47So I'd have to be true that dick is prime.

00:31:49Right.

00:31:49You want to give your friends the prime dick.

00:31:51I will do threesomes, but I will give you her number.

00:31:53Like, I don't care.

00:31:54That's so great.

00:31:54It's fine.

00:31:55Even your boyfriend, your fiance.

00:31:57If you have any guys that you think should have my number, let me know.

00:32:00I know a lot of guys that need your number.

00:32:02Now, what if your guy comes home and says, to be honest, babe, it was the best of my life.

00:32:07Good.

00:32:08Because I barely like giving head.

00:32:09That's fantastic.

00:32:11I'm a fucker.

00:32:11Really?

00:32:11You don't get jealous?

00:32:12No, because now I have a threesome buddy and now I have somebody to take care of you when

00:32:17I'm not around.

00:32:18This is wonderful.

00:32:19Take care of you when I'm not around.

00:32:20It's wonderful.

00:32:20Yeah, because.

00:32:20What a wonderful way to look at life.

00:32:22I'm not a deep froder, but if you can be a girl.

00:32:23That's confidence.

00:32:24You know that.

00:32:25That can deep fro.

00:32:25Which most people lack.

00:32:26By all means, go ahead.

00:32:28Well, I also think like with relationships, there's so much more than sex.

00:32:31You're building like a goal together.

00:32:33You're building a life together.

00:32:34So like relationships are more than sex.

00:32:37So like when it comes to sex, if you find somebody that you like to have sex with, yes,

00:32:41please do that because I'm not always going to be here.

00:32:43Okay.

00:32:43Then what's the rules though?

00:32:44There's got to be some rules.

00:32:45Yeah.

00:32:46Let's go over them.

00:32:47I know yours.

00:32:48Mine was not my rule.

00:32:49That was his rule.

00:32:50Like I don't personally care.

00:32:51Oh, he didn't like the creep pie.

00:32:52Yeah.

00:32:52I don't personally care what anyone was.

00:32:54Kissing with tongue.

00:32:56Everything is cool.

00:32:57It was just creep pie?

00:32:58Just creep pie.

00:32:59Oh, okay.

00:32:59Yeah.

00:33:00Yeah.

00:33:00But I think in a perfect world, there's no rules.

00:33:03It's just, if I like you right now the most, we're doing it.

00:33:07And if I want to do something else, I'm just doing something else.

00:33:09If the trust is there, there shouldn't really be any rules, right?

00:33:12I like to just feel chosen like the primary.

00:33:14So I just had, I'll tell you my rules.

00:33:15I just had like a wild, like sex couple orgy situation.

00:33:19And we had to go over our rules before we got there.

00:33:22And I was like, I want you sleeping next to me every night.

00:33:26Yeah.

00:33:26Fair.

00:33:27That's a good rule.

00:33:28That's a good rule.

00:33:29Right.

00:33:29And he was like, I just want to be checked on.

00:33:32I was like, done.

00:33:33That was our rules.

00:33:34Checked on.

00:33:35What's like, like every now and then just come and make sure I'm okay.

00:33:38I'm like, okay, cool.

00:33:39During the orgy.

00:33:40Oh, during the orgy.

00:33:41Yeah, during the orgy, just come and be like, hey, you good?

00:33:44Yeah.

00:33:44I like that.

00:33:45I like that.

00:33:46Great.

00:33:46Sleep next to me.

00:33:47Every seven and a half minutes, maybe.

00:33:49I don't know.

00:33:50Probably like 47 or something.

00:33:53Every round, you can check in.

00:33:54Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:33:54Not every 10 minutes.

00:33:55Like, I'm good.

00:33:56I'll tell you my rules when I did the open relationships.

00:33:59I did three of them.

00:33:59And I liked it.

00:34:00I liked it.

00:34:01Until I fell in love.

00:34:03To be honest.

00:34:04Until I fell in love.

00:34:05Yeah.

00:34:05Okay.

00:34:06My rules were, you cannot send each other memes.

00:34:10What?

00:34:12How could you get to do it?

00:34:13Because that is so personal.

00:34:15I was laying in bed next to my girlfriend.

00:34:17And she's.

00:34:19What?

00:34:20Oh, Johnny sent me.

00:34:21Just.

00:34:23And then I send her a meme.

00:34:25And she's like.

00:34:27Oh.

00:34:28So she can't laugh at him more than you.

00:34:30His memes were better than mine.

00:34:31That's cheating.

00:34:32Guys have the worst meme game ever.

00:34:34Next.

00:34:35They went for ice cream together.

00:34:37That's fucking cheating.

00:34:39What is it supposed to be?

00:34:39Because now I'm thinking they're doing the whole notebook thing.

00:34:41Steak freeze.

00:34:42And I'm bullshit.

00:34:43Can't do that.

00:34:44Next.

00:34:45What about dinner?

00:34:46Dinner's chill.

00:34:47Okay.

00:34:47So.

00:34:48Dinner's fine.

00:34:48We deserve it.

00:34:49Like my whole thing is with the ice cream thing.

00:34:51Like why are you guys going out for ice cream without me?

00:34:54Well, you know.

00:34:54They went.

00:34:55Like am I out of town?

00:34:56No.

00:34:57I was home.

00:34:57But it's.

00:34:57No, no, no.

00:34:58It was her night.

00:34:59No.

00:34:59We need to all go out for ice cream.

00:35:01No, no.

00:35:02We never did things together.

00:35:04It was.

00:35:05You know, I got a date.

00:35:07And then.

00:35:07Did you like him?

00:35:09Well, that's the issue.

00:35:10I got jealous that she liked him.

00:35:11Did you like him?

00:35:13That was a nice guy.

00:35:13See?

00:35:14You guys could all go out for ice cream.

00:35:16Wow.

00:35:16You should all share ice cream.

00:35:17But then what?

00:35:17What if he has his hand on her leg?

00:35:19Do I have to put it too?

00:35:20No.

00:35:21Oh, it's his turn.

00:35:22Oh, I'm.

00:35:23I'm third wheeling.

00:35:24That's my fucking girlfriend.

00:35:26You can't put his.

00:35:27See, like.

00:35:28Yeah.

00:35:28No, we're at an ice cream shop.

00:35:30No, I'm later.

00:35:32Like, you can't just.

00:35:33No, no.

00:35:33Because it's his night.

00:35:34You can't put the ice cream off his.

00:35:35Okay.

00:35:36Number three.

00:35:37You guys with me or no?

00:35:38Yeah.

00:35:38I'm with you.

00:35:39Okay.

00:35:40Okay.

00:35:40I'm hanging on.

00:35:41They started succession together.

00:35:44Oh, this is where your succession beef comes from.

00:35:46You've heard me say this.

00:35:47They started.

00:35:48Which is such a wonderful show.

00:35:50I haven't seen that.

00:35:51Wonderful show.

00:35:52Yeah.

00:35:53And, you know.

00:35:53If they.

00:35:54If they watch The Office together.

00:35:56Or like Arrested Development.

00:35:58Or, you know.

00:35:59Always Sunny Philadelphia.

00:36:00One of those shows.

00:36:00That's fine.

00:36:01But like a drama.

00:36:03Yeah.

00:36:04Like.

00:36:04They're holding each other.

00:36:05Like, the only thing worse would have been Game of Thrones.

00:36:07Where it's eight seasons.

00:36:08That's commitment.

00:36:09No, I need to be involved.

00:36:10Like, I'm not going to lie.

00:36:11Like, I want to be involved.

00:36:12Unless I'm not in town.

00:36:14Like, if I'm not in town.

00:36:15It's a free for all.

00:36:15But if I'm in town.

00:36:16Yeah.

00:36:16We should all be watching it together.

00:36:17No, no.

00:36:18I can't watch them.

00:36:21It's fine.

00:36:21If it's his night.

00:36:23And I show up.

00:36:24Then how am I supposed to act?

00:36:26What do I do with my hands?

00:36:27You can jerk off while you watch.

00:36:29No.

00:36:30That's fucked.

00:36:30To my girlfriend.

00:36:31Oh, hell yeah.

00:36:32That's my baby.

00:36:33I want the rubber hair.

00:36:34She came to my Thanksgiving dinner with my parents.

00:36:37I can't watch her get.

00:36:38Yeah.

00:36:38You could caress her.

00:36:39So, you know.

00:36:41I had a lot of.

00:36:42Pretty much just don't fucking be in love with this guy.

00:36:46Right?

00:36:46You know what?

00:36:47It's the intimacy.

00:36:48Right.

00:36:49Yeah.

00:36:49The companionship.

00:36:50And last one was cuddling.

00:36:53Yeah.

00:36:53I get that.

00:36:54I get it.

00:36:55That's why I was like.

00:36:55You need to be next to me at night.

00:36:57Right there.

00:36:58Oh, and number five.

00:36:59By far.

00:37:00Was.

00:37:01If he even.

00:37:02And she'll never tell me.

00:37:04But if he says.

00:37:06Who's got the best dick.

00:37:07Or any dirty talking.

00:37:09Taking jabs at me.

00:37:11I don't think they do that.

00:37:11I don't think that that should be a person involved in your relationship then.

00:37:15Well, everyone does it.

00:37:16Every guy talks like that.

00:37:17No, they don't.

00:37:17They don't.

00:37:18They don't.

00:37:18Not every guy does it.

00:37:18Oh, well.

00:37:19Well, I do.

00:37:20No, they don't.

00:37:21Oh, yeah.

00:37:21Like.

00:37:21You know what?

00:37:22That Ryan.

00:37:23He's a nice guy.

00:37:23That's how I do.

00:37:24He's got really nice hair.

00:37:25And you know what?

00:37:26He's got nice hair.

00:37:27I'm not saying that while they're fucking my girlfriend.

00:37:29No.

00:37:29But like.

00:37:29Nobody.

00:37:30When they're talking about you.

00:37:32It's not always jealousy.

00:37:33I'm talking mid-sex.

00:37:35Would you rather your girl watch Succession with a guy?

00:37:37Or get.

00:37:38Cream Pied Gangbang.

00:37:39Like eight humongously big black guys.

00:37:42Cream Pied Gangbang by eight humongous black guys.

00:37:44Absolutely.

00:37:45Then watch Succession.

00:37:45Succession kills me.

00:37:46Yeah.

00:37:47Yeah.

00:37:48Because like.

00:37:49Why are you doing that?

00:37:50Yeah.

00:37:51Like.

00:37:51I know why you're doing the Cream Pied Gangbang.

00:37:53What if I watch Succession?

00:37:53Exactly.

00:37:54You want to go have a sexual fantasy.

00:37:55Yeah.

00:37:55Do that.

00:37:56That's fine.

00:37:56But like.

00:37:56Why?

00:37:57Why are we?

00:37:58I'm alone on the couch.

00:37:59Because I feel like you're.

00:38:00Like perpetuating a relationship at that point.

00:38:03Like a secondary relationship.

00:38:04Right?

00:38:05I like relationships.

00:38:05I like having like seven of them at the same time.

00:38:07And queen of ball jobs.

00:38:08Can I tell you one last thing?

00:38:10And then I'll stop yapping.

00:38:10I feel like I'm yapping too much.

00:38:12Okay.

00:38:13One thing.

00:38:13When I caught my ex cheating on me.

00:38:16I caught.

00:38:17I called the guy.

00:38:18Because she denied it.

00:38:19Denied it.

00:38:19I found out who it was.

00:38:20I called him.

00:38:20And I said.

00:38:21Hey.

00:38:21This is Ryan.

00:38:22You fucked my girl last night.

00:38:24And he goes.

00:38:24No.

00:38:25No.

00:38:25We didn't have sex.

00:38:27She just sucked my dick.

00:38:28That's worse.

00:38:30Oh my god.

00:38:31No way.

00:38:32See I feel like dick sucking is so impersonal.

00:38:34What?

00:38:34It's like.

00:38:35Dick sucking is next to it?

00:38:36She walked away her knees.

00:38:37Put his dick in her mouth.

00:38:40And sucked on it.

00:38:42And didn't even get a head back?

00:38:45She did that.

00:38:46She did all that for another man.

00:38:48While I was at home texting her.

00:38:50Miss you.

00:38:51Dog's okay.

00:38:52He must have an epic dick.

00:38:53I wish he just fucked her.

00:38:55He could do with her.

00:38:56He could have brought another friend in.

00:38:58To suck a penis.

00:38:59Is the meanest way to cheat.

00:39:01That is so mean.

00:39:02It's probably the meanest thing you do to a person in the world.

00:39:04I never think of it like that.

00:39:05You just brought a new attention to me.

00:39:08Like I never think of it like that.

00:39:09Like I always think of it as like the next step besides handshake.

00:39:12You know?

00:39:13It's like after a hug.

00:39:14It's like a job.

00:39:16You know?

00:39:16Like it's like a getting to know you situation.

00:39:19Do you give head every time you fuck?

00:39:20Yeah.

00:39:20Oh fuck.

00:39:21A hundred percent.

00:39:22Sometimes I go straight to fucking.

00:39:24I'm a fucker.

00:39:24I would say for Sarah J.

00:39:26She fucks sometimes when she's giving head.

00:39:29Yeah.

00:39:30And I have to wait for them to eat me out first.

00:39:32Before I give head.

00:39:33Then I give head.

00:39:34Yeah, yeah.

00:39:34You make the pussy get eaten.

00:39:36I'm like, oh yeah.

00:39:37How was blank comedian's name at eating pussy?

00:39:41Solid.

00:39:42Solid.

00:39:42What?

00:39:42I think everyone I fucked.

00:39:44I feel like he would be good.

00:39:45Can you tell Sarah J.

00:39:47What I know about that night?

00:39:48I feel like he would be good.

00:39:50He'd be good.

00:39:51I'm guessing.

00:39:52Those were the most iconic voice notes.

00:39:53But also I know his partners.

00:39:56And so I'm like, no.

00:39:57Yeah.

00:39:57He's got some wrist master.

00:39:59I fucked behind his partners before.

00:40:00So.

00:40:01Sarah J.

00:40:01We're going to bleep the names.

00:40:02I would love to hear which celebrities you've dabbled with.

00:40:05I cannot tell you.

00:40:06No, but we'll bleep it.

00:40:07I know.

00:40:08Don't you feel the friendship connection here?

00:40:10I do.

00:40:11Yeah.

00:40:12I really do.

00:40:12I do too.

00:40:13Like you can trust me, right?

00:40:14I don't tell anyone.

00:40:16Most guests share.

00:40:17And we never say a word.

00:40:19No.

00:40:19I've got a nice roster though.

00:40:20I will tell you that.

00:40:21I've got a really nice roster.

00:40:23Do you have a celeb on the roster right now?

00:40:25Several.

00:40:26Yeah.

00:40:26Whoa.

00:40:27Yeah.

00:40:27Vegas?

00:40:29Like global.

00:40:30Well, she herself is a celebrity.

00:40:33So of course she is.

00:40:34Yeah.

00:40:35Yeah.

00:40:36And you know what I always say?

00:40:37Stars are the celebrities to the celebrities.

00:40:40That's nice.

00:40:40Right?

00:40:41Isn't it true?

00:40:41Yeah.

00:40:42It is kind of funny.

00:40:43You know, like I've walked into a room where I'm like a little bit like I'm trying to get

00:40:48over my nerves because I know I'm about to meet like this person that's like larger

00:40:51than life.

00:40:52And they're fucking nervous.

00:40:53In the moment they're fucking nervous.

00:40:55I'm like, oh.

00:40:56And especially.

00:40:57I'm like, let me just suck your dick.

00:40:58It'll make it all feel better.

00:40:59But when they get in the bedroom, then they really get nervous because.

00:41:02Yeah.

00:41:02You know, there's been some people that I've had sex with where I feel like they've got

00:41:06like a laundry list of positions and things that they wanted to do with me that they've

00:41:10wanted to do with me their whole life.

00:41:11And that puts me at ease.

00:41:14Right.

00:41:14What's your head technique?

00:41:15Like, what are you doing?

00:41:16What's going on?

00:41:17Um, okay.

00:41:18So first of all, like pretend like this is.

00:41:21Hey, can I just say something midway?

00:41:23Oh my God.

00:41:24No way it went by that fast.

00:41:25Can I just say something?

00:41:26Yeah.

00:41:27This episode is so much better.

00:41:29I don't know.

00:41:30I wasn't there for the other episode.

00:41:32So.

00:41:33Yeah.

00:41:34Which one do you think is better?

00:41:35What do you think?

00:41:36She hates me.

00:41:37Carry on.

00:41:37She hates me.

00:41:38Yeah.

00:41:38We already have a rapport.

00:41:40You know what I'm saying?

00:41:40We've already had dinner together.

00:41:42We may share a penis one day.

00:41:43Oh.

00:41:44Great.

00:41:45Can we share more than one?

00:41:46Yeah.

00:41:47Yeah.

00:41:47Like 40.

00:41:48That's a little too many.

00:41:49Like, what if we do three?

00:41:51That's okay.

00:41:51Or four.

00:41:53Yeah.

00:41:53Like two each.

00:41:54Hey, let's play a game right now.

00:41:55Why don't you both text me right now three dicks that you would choose to do a threesome

00:42:01with without communicating with each other?

00:42:04How fun.

00:42:04I don't have my phone on me.

00:42:06Okay.

00:42:06Use mine.

00:42:07Okay?

00:42:08I'll say it out loud.

00:42:09No, no, no.

00:42:10That's the game.

00:42:11Because it's exciting to see if there's the same thing.

00:42:13No, no.

00:42:13You know what?

00:42:14Three random black guys.

00:42:15Three random tested black guys.

00:42:16Yes.

00:42:17Yes.

00:42:17Like, whoever she chooses, I'm down with.

00:42:19Three random tested black guys.

00:42:20You don't really care?

00:42:20I can give a fuck.

00:42:21Eight inches above.

00:42:22Really?

00:42:23No, I can give a fuck.

00:42:24Eight inches with a curve.

00:42:25Uncircumcised.

00:42:27Sounds good.

00:42:27Are you a size queen, Sarah?

00:42:28Not at all.

00:42:29But I will do a size.

00:42:30You don't?

00:42:31You're not a size?

00:42:32No, I'll do all the sizes.

00:42:33Wait, I need to know your head game because I don't think I'm a deco.

00:42:36Okay, wait, wait.

00:42:36Just to finish the side thing.

00:42:38Men, four and a half.

00:42:40I can do it.

00:42:40You would have done the old me?

00:42:41I would have done the old you.

00:42:43I would have done the old me.

00:42:44But you would prefer the new me.

00:42:45I would have put your dick and your balls in my mouth.

00:42:48Wow.

00:42:48The coolest thing anyone can do.

00:42:50That's sick.

00:42:51That's pretty cool for, yeah.

00:42:52I mean, that's the best thing you can do to a small dick is you put a whole package in

00:42:55your mouth and blah, blah, blah.

00:42:56Yeah.

00:42:56I had that once.

00:42:57Oh my God.

00:42:58Yeah.

00:42:58No one can do that to the new me, though.

00:43:00I'll tell you that.

00:43:01I can do it easy.

00:43:02Thanks to filler.

00:43:05Oh, wait.

00:43:06First, also, before we get to her head thing, let's tell her about our night at Father Damens.

00:43:11Oh, we didn't hook up, but we had a shared moment.

00:43:15Okay, here's what happened.

00:43:16My first time at a sex party.

00:43:18Oh, yeah.

00:43:18It's your first time at a sex party?

00:43:20Last summer.

00:43:21It was last June.

00:43:22It changed everything.

00:43:23Changed my life.

00:43:23Oh, shit.

00:43:24It really did.

00:43:25Changed my life.

00:43:25Sex parties are fun.

00:43:27Yeah.

00:43:27Especially when it's the right group of people.

00:43:29I just had a really amazing one.

00:43:30Where did you go?

00:43:31Medellin, Colombia.

00:43:33Whoa.

00:43:34They have sex parties there?

00:43:35Fuck yeah.

00:43:36I'll be there.

00:43:36Sounds like there's just something illegal about it.

00:43:39Everything is illegal about it.

00:43:41That's what makes it cool.

00:43:42Hey, this is what they say.

00:43:43I just got gonorrhea from Medellin.

00:43:45Oh.

00:43:46Yeah.

00:43:46Sorry.

00:43:47They go, no two, no two.

00:43:49Oh.

00:43:51Right.

00:43:52They do say that, actually.

00:43:53But usually they bring the two, so it's fine.

00:43:56Yeah, they always have it.

00:43:57Always.

00:43:57So condom sex, condom sex, condom sex.

00:44:00Last night did so much.

00:44:01See, lost my erection.

00:44:03Can you just give me a head without the condom for a bit?

00:44:0630 seconds.

00:44:07Boom.

00:44:08Black and green pus shooting out of my dick the whole flight home.

00:44:11The most disgusting gonorrhea.

00:44:14Whoa.

00:44:14You know what I'm going to say?

00:44:15From the throat.

00:44:16I'm going to tell you that you're full of shit because it takes five to 12 days for incubation.

00:44:22Okay, maybe I did it the first and second night.

00:44:24Yeah, I'm like.

00:44:25Maybe I thought head didn't give you STDs and I took it off every fucking time.

00:44:28It takes five to 12 days for incubation.

00:44:29You got me, Sarah J.

00:44:30Sorry.

00:44:31No, you got me.

00:44:32And it takes even longer for it to get green.

00:44:34It takes five to 12 days.

00:44:36This is part of being a boy.

00:44:37You had gano for a sec.

00:44:38Okay, so it takes five to 12 days for it to show up in your urine, right?

00:44:42And it takes like 10 to 30 days to turn green coming out of your dick.

00:44:47So you had it for a while.

00:44:49There's no way.

00:44:49No, it was on the flight.

00:44:51Do you want to see my underwear?

00:44:52I do, I do, I do.

00:44:53Oh, no.

00:44:54Okay, you guys.

00:44:55Teach her about blowjobs and I'll look for my green dick.

00:44:57Yes.

00:44:58So, first of all, obviously, just like everything else, communication.

00:45:01You got to look at them and see what they're feeling.

00:45:03And also, you got to feel the dick and see what it's feeling, too, right?

00:45:06You got to give it that wetty.

00:45:07Yes, you do it wet, but sometimes they like it dry.

00:45:09So you start out wet because most people like it wet.

00:45:11You start out wet and maybe start out with a hand because hands are better.

00:45:15Not to interrupt, but there was a...

00:45:17Oh, yeah.

00:45:18That's rough.

00:45:18You had to stop the blowjobs and the show.

00:45:19No, you had that 20 days before that happened.

00:45:22No, no.

00:45:23Ouchie.

00:45:2320?

00:45:24You had that 20 days.

00:45:26Gave it to me.

00:45:26That was advanced.

00:45:27I'm just saying, I'm letting you know, you had that 20 days before that happened.

00:45:30Those are advanced symptoms.

00:45:31Shit.

00:45:32Those are a little bit advanced.

00:45:33The reason why we get tested every 14 days is because that's before that happens.

00:45:38Like, you have 5 to 12 days before it shows up in your pee.

00:45:43Right.

00:45:43And after it shows up in your pee, that's when it starts turning green.

00:45:47Yeah.

00:45:47So, after 15 days.

00:45:49Which STI would you say is the one to be most scared of?

00:45:53Well, the most common one is chlamydia, but it's the least scary because hardly anybody

00:45:58has any symptoms at all.

00:45:59And Mgen, too.

00:46:00Catching a cold, baby.

00:46:00Give me a Z-Pak, four pills.

00:46:02I don't know the rest of you.

00:46:03I'm just saying.

00:46:04Mgen is kind of like a fucking pain in the ass because also...

00:46:06Mgen is annoying.

00:46:07Two weeks off.

00:46:07No.

00:46:07Two weeks off work.

00:46:09Yeah.

00:46:09At least two weeks off work and no symptoms, which is fucking whack.

00:46:12And the antibiotics kill me.

00:46:13The one that scares me the most, though, syphilis.

00:46:17What is syphilis?

00:46:18Fucking scary.

00:46:19First of all, it's a virus.

00:46:21It's a virus and it lasts forever.

00:46:23So, when you have syphilis, you have to take...

00:46:25Is your blood to detect it?

00:46:26Yes.

00:46:27You have to take medication in order to keep your levels low so that you are not transmittable.

00:46:31And you have to keep monitoring your whole syphilis numbers for, like, the rest of your

00:46:36fucking life if you're going to have sex with people.

00:46:37I don't know anyone who's ever got syphilis.

00:46:39Mr. Marcus.

00:46:40We all know that.

00:46:41Yeah.

00:46:41That's the most famous.

00:46:42Yeah.

00:46:43I met Mr. Marcus as a photographer.

00:46:44I love Mr. Marcus.

00:46:46Wait.

00:46:46He's just known as the syphilis guy?

00:46:47I mean, I wouldn't...

00:46:49Don't do that to him.

00:46:50Like, Magic Johnson aids Mr. Marcus syphilis?

00:46:52Yeah, he's the most famously known syphilis guy.

00:46:55Poor guy.

00:46:56Yeah, no, same, same.

00:46:57I mean, like, I don't hold anything against anybody, but the thing is, is, like, syphilis

00:47:01is the one that scares me the most because it's a virus that stays with you forever and

00:47:04you've got to monitor it for, like, eternity.

00:47:06You know what they say.

00:47:07You could build 10,000 bridges, but you catch syphilis once.

00:47:11You're not a bridge builder.

00:47:12You're the syphilis guy.

00:47:13Where did they say that?

00:47:15I never heard this before.

00:47:18The actual saying is, you build a thousand bridges.

00:47:20I mean, obviously, like, HIV aside, we, like, we all, I think, are scared of this.

00:47:27No, I'm not scared of HIV at all.

00:47:29Okay, well.

00:47:29Because you can take the pills now.

00:47:31Okay.

00:47:32And it stops it and you can't transmit it.

00:47:33Well, you can also take the pills for the syphilis.

00:47:35Bring it on.

00:47:36You can also take the pills for the syphilis, but there's big fucking sores with syphilis

00:47:39too.

00:47:40So, realistically, am I wrong to say nothing to be scared of?

00:47:45You know what?

00:47:46And I am going to slightly side with you and tell you that most STDs are not that scary

00:47:51because, and as long as they're bacterial, the viral ones are a little bit scary, which

00:47:55is syphilis, herpes, and HIV.

00:47:57Those are viral and they'll stick with you forever.

00:47:59The bacterial ones.

00:48:01But stick with you in a chill way.

00:48:02I mean, now that we have fucking science.

00:48:05I'll tell you what I'm scared of, Sarah J.

00:48:06But bacteria is scary.

00:48:07You want to know what I'm scared of?

00:48:08The social stigma is scary.

00:48:09A bacteria is not scary.

00:48:10I mean, that's what I meant.

00:48:11Bacteria is not scary.

00:48:12Do you want to know what I'm really scared of, Sarah J?

00:48:14Tell me.

00:48:15A broken heart.

00:48:16Aww.

00:48:18Dude, broken hearts are crazy.

00:48:19You ever had your heart broken, Sarah J?

00:48:22Yeah.

00:48:23Whoa, you said it like you didn't.

00:48:25Yeah.

00:48:26No, I had to think about it.

00:48:26Like, you know, I was married and I got divorced.

00:48:29And even though it was my initiative to get divorced, still my heart was broken.

00:48:33Yeah, fair enough.

00:48:34Yeah.

00:48:34Like, you want things to work, right?

00:48:36I bet you because of the job thing.

00:48:39Because, really, let's be real.

00:48:41When guys talk, you don't hear a locker room talk.

00:48:43Like, dude, she sucks my dick every day.

00:48:46That's like the first thing people mention about a cool girlfriend.

00:48:49Wow.

00:48:50Right?

00:48:50I'm a shitty ass girlfriend.

00:48:51You must get the most clout in the locker room all time.

00:48:55I know you do.

00:48:55I've heard about you.

00:48:56You know?

00:48:57What did I say?

00:48:58You don't fuck guys I hang out with.

00:48:59But I'm sure your locker room talk is all time.

00:49:02So, I'm sure you've broken a lot of hearts.

00:49:04Yeah.

00:49:05Yeah, I've broken a couple here and there.

00:49:07I try not to, but it happens.

00:49:09Yeah.

00:49:10I'm sure it's guys that you shoot OF content with and you're like, okay, his dick's cool.

00:49:15Our content's good.

00:49:16And then they fall in love with you.

00:49:17I don't shoot OF content with hardly anybody.

00:49:20You just do solos?

00:49:22No.

00:49:23Actually, like, I pay performers.

00:49:27Oh.

00:49:27Yeah.

00:49:28Oh, so they can't even post it.

00:49:31Yeah.

00:49:31You're a gangster.

00:49:34I respect that.

00:49:35You do that too.

00:49:36Sometimes.

00:49:36Yeah.

00:49:36There's very few people that I actually shoot OF content with.

00:49:39One's Lil D.

00:49:41I love that guy.

00:49:42Yeah.

00:49:42I like Lil D.

00:49:43He's awesome.

00:49:44I like Lil D.

00:49:44Yeah.

00:49:45Yeah.

00:49:45No way Lil D's your boy.

00:49:47He's my boy.

00:49:48Yeah.

00:49:48Lil D.

00:49:48He's our boy.

00:49:49Yeah.

00:49:49He's cool, man.

00:49:50Yeah.

00:49:50I mean, he's everybody's boy.

00:49:51Come on, let's face it.

00:49:52Yeah.

00:49:52He's like the Florida Ricky Johnson.

00:49:54He's great.

00:49:56His dirty talk is so good.

00:49:57Yeah.

00:49:58Sexy ass.

00:49:58Yeah.

00:49:59He is sexy.

00:50:00And you know what?

00:50:01To be honest with you, this is like really weird to say, but I've seen him grow up, which

00:50:05is just like weird, but awesome.

00:50:07It's cute.

00:50:07Yeah.

00:50:08Hey, how would you girls rank your own dirty talks scale of one to ten?

00:50:12I'm pretty stellar.

00:50:13Like if I'm locked in, I can go there.

00:50:15One out of ten.

00:50:16You say some shit that's illegal in nine states.

00:50:19Yeah.

00:50:19I feel like I'm a solid seven.

00:50:21Like I'm a solid seven.

00:50:22Yeah.

00:50:23I feel like I'm a solid seven.

00:50:24Well, you don't hear me all the time.

00:50:26But like, I feel like I'm a solid seven.

00:50:28Are you self-conscious about like being a broken record?

00:50:32Yeah.

00:50:32I would.

00:50:33I would bet.

00:50:33Yeah.

00:50:34Yeah.

00:50:34For sure.

00:50:34That's why I think that's why I say I'm a solid seven.

00:50:37Cause it's like, I think the same shit.

00:50:38Like, fuck.

00:50:39I said that last time.

00:50:40Yeah.

00:50:40I think I'm a new one every time.

00:50:42Yeah, but I don't.

00:50:43I'm just like.

00:50:44Do you kind of like prep your notes like Eminem would for a battle?

00:50:47No, but no.

00:50:47I wish I would kind of.

00:50:49In a makeup chair, I write down everything I'm thinking about the guy and all the things

00:50:52I want him to do to me.

00:50:52And so I could say it when he starts fucking hearing.

00:50:54I want people to do the same fucking shit to me all the time.

00:50:57That's part of the broken record thing.

00:50:58I'm like, oh, I want your fucking dick in my mouth.

00:51:01I want to slob all over it.

00:51:02I want to feel how it grows inside my mouth.

00:51:05It's like, I want the same shit all the time.

00:51:07So I feel like a little broken record, but it's authentic.

00:51:10It's not like I'm rehearsing.

00:51:11It's very authentic.

00:51:12It's just like, I do actually want the same thing all the time.

00:51:14Which one, which one just comes out of your pheromone body when you're fucking feeling it?

00:51:19Which dirty talk just natural is the natural ones?

00:51:23Well, I'm always like, oh, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it.

00:51:26Oh yeah.

00:51:26Get it.

00:51:26Yeah.

00:51:28Yeah.

00:51:28Wow.

00:51:29While you.

00:51:29Yeah.

00:51:29I'm like, oh, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it.

00:51:32I've never had a girl say that to me.

00:51:33Really?

00:51:34I like it.

00:51:34Get it?

00:51:35Get it.

00:51:35Ah, get it, get it, get it, get it.

00:51:38Yeah.

00:51:39Get the pussy, get the cum, get the dick.

00:51:42Yeah.

00:51:42Get it, get it, get it.

00:51:43Get it, get it, get it.

00:51:44Yeah.

00:51:45That's my go-to.

00:51:46Zoomy?

00:51:47Fuck me till I'm ugly.

00:51:49I've never dropped that one.

00:51:50That's a good one.

00:51:50Yeah, fuck me till I'm ugly.

00:51:52And I feel like then they're like, okay, we're going to fuck you for a long time.

00:51:54When you say that, oh, because you're so pretty.

00:51:56I am so pretty.

00:51:57Or is it like, fuck me till I'm ugly, that's hot.

00:51:59Fuck me till I'm, is it like another way of saying like, fuck me till I'm messy?

00:52:03Like until my eyelashes is on my chin?

00:52:05Like, and like my mascara is like-

00:52:07I'm not one of those porn girls who like tries to keep it cute.

00:52:09Like halfway through the scene, I'm like-

00:52:10You want to get fucking-

00:52:11Yeah, same, same, same, same.

00:52:12I think what's hot is the demise.

00:52:14It's like, I got so cute.

00:52:15I agree.

00:52:16And now you're going to fuck it up.

00:52:17Like I can't go outside, like spit everywhere.

00:52:19That's so hot.

00:52:20At the crazy sex party I just went to, there was this girl with this ass like this big and

00:52:24I was just like, I was like, can I rub your butt?

00:52:27And so I rub her butt with oil and I was like, oh, I love this, I love this.

00:52:31And I was like, I'm going to need to dive in there.

00:52:32Can I dive in there?

00:52:33She was like, yeah.

00:52:34I was like, okay.

00:52:34And I dove in there and I lost an eyelash.

00:52:37What did you dive in there?

00:52:37I lost an eyelash immediately.

00:52:39The eyelash would just, it just left me.

00:52:41My eyelash just left me.

00:52:42I came up.

00:52:43We were on a pool table.

00:52:44I came up and I was like, I looked around.

00:52:46Everybody's looking at me and I was like, oh, will somebody hold that face?

00:52:49I'll take this one too.

00:52:50But girls, because you're superstars, when you go to normie sex parties, don't you feel

00:52:56like everyone's kind of waiting around to get in your holes?

00:52:59It depends on the sex party.

00:53:00I've been to parties with you.

00:53:01I see it.

00:53:02They're ready for me.

00:53:03But that's because I'm a star.

00:53:04At that one, that one, it was like a lineup of dudes being like, when's my dream?

00:53:08When's my dream?

00:53:09I only fucked like four guys.

00:53:10No, there was seven.

00:53:11Oh yeah.

00:53:11I only fucked like seven.

00:53:13And they were all bugging her.

00:53:14It was kind of cringe, to be honest.

00:53:16Yeah.

00:53:16Those are not my favorite parties.

00:53:17No, you're in two.

00:53:19I need to have like a karaoke sign up sheet for my holes.

00:53:22Like, I'm like, one, two, three, one, two, three, one, two, three, two, three, two, three.

00:53:25Yeah.

00:53:25Don't you find that Sarah J is here?

00:53:27Oh, shit.

00:53:27If I saw Sarah J at the Medellin sex party, I'd cut the lie.

00:53:32Yeah.

00:53:32I'd be like, what the fuck is happening?

00:53:33Like, to be honest, like, I try to make my group like a mixture of like really hot people.

00:53:38And I usually go for the ladies.

00:53:40So I'm usually like, wait a second.

00:53:43And like, I want to fuck all the girls first.

00:53:45And while I'm fucking a girl, you're more than welcome to enter.

00:53:49But I am focused on ladies.

00:53:51Because I don't feel like I get to fuck enough women in real life.

00:53:55And so I, whenever I have the opportunity to fuck women, I really want to fuck women.

00:53:59Because guys are like always there.

00:54:00Guys are like, guys always want to fuck.

00:54:03Okay?

00:54:03Yeah.

00:54:03But if I'm at a sex party, I'm going to fuck every woman there.

00:54:07And you're more than welcome to get in where you fit in while I'm doing that.

00:54:10That's cool.

00:54:12This Medellin sex party.

00:54:13I have to be there.

00:54:15Were you there and there just happened to be one across the street?

00:54:18Or did you fly there for it?

00:54:19No, I flew there for it.

00:54:20We played there.

00:54:21It was 14 people.

00:54:24It was pretty good.

00:54:25And who are these 14 people?

00:54:26You know, some of them porn stars, some of them content creators, some of them.

00:54:29But none of it was filmed.

00:54:30It was all just for funsies.

00:54:32Okay, so it was like upper status.

00:54:35It was.

00:54:36Yeah, yeah.

00:54:36It was all hot people.

00:54:37We all had to submit photographs.

00:54:39Who hosted it?

00:54:40I can't tell you.

00:54:41But like, it was super hot.

00:54:43We all had to submit photographs and everybody knew who everybody was.

00:54:47And we'd all met before.

00:54:49Wow.

00:54:49Yeah, it was good.

00:54:50It was good times.

00:54:51Very nice.

00:54:52Yeah.

00:54:53When I dated Alita Lopez last summer, it was the most amazing moment of my life.

00:54:58She said, Ryan, we went to Kinky Rabbit.

00:55:01Okay.

00:55:02Me in the middle of the party in front of everyone.

00:55:04Oh.

00:55:05And I did.

00:55:06And to me, to this day, you know, people say, what's the craziest thing I've ever done?

00:55:10That's the craziest thing.

00:55:11That's the craziest thing.

00:55:11Craziest thing I've ever done in my life.

00:55:13Because people kind of huddled around.

00:55:14You were there.

00:55:15I was there.

00:55:16It was after the Brazzers Gala in September.

00:55:18No, I didn't go to the Kinky after.

00:55:20I would have known.

00:55:21It would have been a core memory.

00:55:22And I can't believe I did that, you know.

00:55:23And that was with my old dick, too.

00:55:25Well, I was pumping it.

00:55:26But I didn't get my injections yet.

00:55:28That's dope.

00:55:29That's dope.

00:55:29Wait, how many inches are you now?

00:55:31He said he's girthy.

00:55:32On the best day ever, six and a half.

00:55:35But usually my erection will be like just under six and a quarter.

00:55:38He said he's got a lot of girth.

00:55:39But my girth is good.

00:55:40Do you guys want to see it?

00:55:41A new one?

00:55:41Yes.

00:55:42I want to see it.

00:55:43I need to see it.

00:55:44You keep talking about your penis and you see it.

00:55:45So my girl will send you.

00:55:46Do you have a before and after?

00:55:47Do you like side by sides?

00:55:48You know, I was so ashamed of my old cock.

00:55:50I never took a picture of it.

00:55:50No.

00:55:51You never took like a...

00:55:53Yeah.

00:55:53But did you walk through life as a small dick guy?

00:55:55Or you were like, I'm just a cool guy?

00:55:57Very insecure.

00:55:58You know, every time I would like cheat on a girl or treat her bad or ghost her or whatever.

00:56:04Wow, whatever.

00:56:05He had a small dick anyway.

00:56:06Haunted me my whole life.

00:56:07Oh.

00:56:08Francesca Farago told everyone in my town that I've spoken to.

00:56:11You know what?

00:56:12If it didn't bother you, they wouldn't have said it.

00:56:14Oh, it bothered me.

00:56:15See?

00:56:16They knew it.

00:56:17They knew it.

00:56:17What do you mean?

00:56:18If you were like, yeah, and look what I do with this small dick, motherfucker.

00:56:21No, it wasn't.

00:56:22Yeah, but see.

00:56:24Like, did you have some power behind that little wig?

00:56:26Do you guys understand?

00:56:26Because girls are like, oh, I have flat tits.

00:56:29I have no ass.

00:56:30You have no idea how the little dick is like.

00:56:31I do.

00:56:32One of my favorite lovers has a pretty small dick.

00:56:36What does that mean, one of my favorite lovers?

00:56:37Like a lover.

00:56:38That's her favorite.

00:56:39How many lovers do you have?

00:56:40I have a stable.

00:56:42And he's one of your favorites?

00:56:43Yeah, he's one of my favorites.

00:56:44Sometimes a little bit of a small penis.

00:56:46Good for animal, good for squid.

00:56:47How old is he?

00:56:49It's about like, it's about like that.

00:56:52Okay, and why is he one of your favorites?

00:56:54Because he's really passionate, and he also uses his hands and his mouth and his dick.

00:56:58He uses all the things.

00:56:59See, I had to do all the bells and whistles, too.

00:57:01But the thing is, is I like that.

00:57:03Like, let's get all involved.

00:57:04Let's do all the things.

00:57:05We make out for a little while, and then I start to get all my click.

00:57:08It's all swollen, and then he starts rubbing on me.

00:57:11That's this guy's life, every performance, every night.

00:57:14But the thing is, is like, what a great lover.

00:57:17Wouldn't it be cool to just be Hollywood Cash and be like, pussy, let's go.

00:57:20No.

00:57:20He does a lot.

00:57:21Okay, so that is also fun.

00:57:23Also fun.

00:57:24But I have different lanes for different types of lovers.

00:57:28That's why I have many lovers.

00:57:28No, I get that.

00:57:29But I'm talking how, this guy's poor, miserable life.

00:57:32No, not a poor, miserable life.

00:57:33You don't understand.

00:57:34He enjoys.

00:57:35And not only that, but he also.

00:57:36We pretend we enjoy it.

00:57:37We don't fucking know.

00:57:38No, he enjoys it because he's really feeling passionate about the whole thing.

00:57:42And I can feel his passion.

00:57:43And the passion's the part that makes it hot.

00:57:45It's like if you had, fuck, I don't even know how to compare small.

00:57:47But that's kind of like.

00:57:48How would you compare small to a girl?

00:57:50What?

00:57:50How would you compare small to a girl?

00:57:52Like a really disgusting vagina?

00:57:54Like a loose pussy?

00:57:54Really wide.

00:57:55No.

00:57:56No.

00:57:57You know when.

00:57:58Like a stinky vagina.

00:58:00Like a chronically stinky one?

00:58:01Oh, like you can't fix it?

00:58:03That's a great comparison.

00:58:04And there's nothing she can do about it.

00:58:06Yeah, there's nothing she can do about it.

00:58:07She could just be the best in every other way.

00:58:09And every time she breaks out of the guy.

00:58:11She's like, I suck amazing dick.

00:58:13She'd be like, I suck amazing dick.

00:58:15And I give amazing hand jobs.

00:58:17And I make out really good.

00:58:18And I'm fun.

00:58:19You're right.

00:58:20Yeah.

00:58:20Okay, fair enough.

00:58:21And that's okay.

00:58:22Like, I mean, think about it.

00:58:23Like, if you were with a girl who was like, meh, on sex.

00:58:27But also she gave amazing head and amazing hand jobs.

00:58:30And made out.

00:58:31And was like super fun and really hot.

00:58:33Who cares?

00:58:33Yeah, you're right.

00:58:34That's true facts.

00:58:35There's guys that know how to make me squirt hard.

00:58:37Right.

00:58:37But fucking them is whatever.

00:58:39Right.

00:58:40See?

00:58:40I need to get squirt sometimes.

00:58:42I want entertainment.

00:58:44Yeah.

00:58:45I'm here for variety.

00:58:46Yes.

00:58:47I need the whole kitten caboodle.

00:58:49I need you to do all the things.

00:58:50How much should a session be on like a Wednesday night?

00:58:53An hour.

00:58:55Oh, no.

00:58:55I'm much less than that.

00:58:57Like, what kind of session are we talking about?

00:58:59From?

00:58:59A Wednesday night session is like 15 minutes.

00:59:01From first kiss to not.

00:59:02Yeah.

00:59:03Like, I'm good with like.

00:59:04But I also wouldn't mind doing it multiple times.

00:59:06Like, can we do three 15 minute sessions?

00:59:09Okay.

00:59:09I feel that.

00:59:10That's like where I'm at.

00:59:11Because I would like to do like 15 minutes and get some water and smoke a blunt and maybe

00:59:14have a sandwich.

00:59:15And then we can do it again.

00:59:16Right.

00:59:17Yeah.

00:59:17And between sessions, you're hanging out naked?

00:59:19Totally.

00:59:20Yeah.

00:59:20We don't put our clothes on in between sessions.

00:59:22I put my underwear on between sessions.

00:59:25A lot of guys do.

00:59:26Sometimes.

00:59:26You know what?

00:59:27Even though I'm naked, a lot of guys do.

00:59:29Well, we're not ready for.

00:59:30Well, a lot of guys don't like the look of their dick when it's small.

00:59:32That's it.

00:59:33When you, you know, big Mario.

00:59:34Yeah.

00:59:35And then you straight up.

00:59:36Yeah.

00:59:37No, I get it.

00:59:38When you're down there, regular Mario, you're like, ah.

00:59:40I totally accept that.

00:59:41I get it.

00:59:42I get it.

00:59:42But also, I don't mind if you just want to like let, let a little flap around while we're.

00:59:46Yeah.

00:59:46I don't care about something.

00:59:47It won't bother me.

00:59:48I like being naked and then putting my shoes back on.

00:59:50Yes.

00:59:50I used to do that when I was a little bit younger.

00:59:53For traction, I can ride better if I have my condors still on.

00:59:55I actually also have like better riding capabilities with heels on.

01:00:01Sometimes I can ride hard, but it depends on the surface area of the mattress or chair.

01:00:06Mm-hmm.

01:00:07Wow.

01:00:08I think we should fuck.

01:00:09Okay.

01:00:11Yeah.

01:00:11Tonight.

01:00:12She's in town tonight.

01:00:13And if you're not comfortable with ladies, I totally get it.

01:00:16We can share a peen.

01:00:17I just went on a super vacation.

01:00:18I've been, I've had so many threesomes with girls who didn't really like girls and that's

01:00:23totally fine.

01:00:24I might be changed.

01:00:25You can fuck the peen and then I can fuck the peen and then I can help you fuck the peen.

01:00:28Sometimes when I get really high, I do save images of hot girls and I stare at it for

01:00:31a long time.

01:00:32Sarah, can you teach her something very important?

01:00:35Whatever that is to you.

01:00:36Something very important.

01:00:37I want Kazumi to take a torch with her.

01:00:40I want to know how to please a woman because sometimes a girl's so hot.

01:00:42Yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:00:42But I don't know how to, I always think like, oh, what's the point?

01:00:46I don't know how to make her come.

01:00:47So I'm going to just walk away.

01:00:48Yeah.

01:00:49I think making out and doing this little diddly with the clit while you're making out is like

01:00:55a really good beginning.

01:00:57Yeah.

01:00:58You just got to like make out real nice and like while you're doing it.

01:01:02I think that's a good way to get started.

01:01:04You're totally hitting on it, right?

01:01:05Yeah.

01:01:06That's awesome.

01:01:07I'm ovulating.

01:01:08That's cool.

01:01:09I'm seeing Sarah Jane in action.

01:01:12This is awesome.

01:01:13You know?

01:01:14Wow.

01:01:14Do you like a...

01:01:15This is like watching Tom Brady throw the football.

01:01:17Okay.

01:01:17Jerkmate.

01:01:18Number one side in the world.

01:01:19We love Jerkmate.

01:01:19Our partner.

01:01:20Oh, that's nice, Sarah Jane.

01:01:22Can I say something?

01:01:23Yeah.

01:01:23You're like the coolest chick in the world.

01:01:25Fuck.

01:01:26I love this.

01:01:26She is the coolest chick in the world.

01:01:27Isn't she awesome?

01:01:28See, I feel that about her.

01:01:29I wish she were my mom.

01:01:30I follow her on social media and stuff.

01:01:33She's so cool.

01:01:34And I'm like, she's pretty fucking cool.

01:01:35How does she get so much done while traveling?

01:01:38I don't get it.

01:01:39I don't do anything when traveling.

01:01:40Yeah.

01:01:40Except get booked.

01:01:42It's like she's running this empire of Kazumi while just...

01:01:46You know, I've sat in on some of her seminars when she's had seminars and stuff.

01:01:50Oh, we need a 2 and a pound to get her in Amsterdam.

01:01:52Yes, also that.

01:01:53And she's so smart.

01:01:55And she's got so much knowledge and information.

01:01:57Yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:01:57Very impressive.

01:01:58Like, I don't say that about people that I don't mean that about.

01:02:01I don't have to say shit about people.

01:02:03But I will say that about you.

01:02:04Kazumi's a genius.

01:02:05Yeah, you're really fucking smart.

01:02:08It's crazy when you think about...

01:02:09And horny, which is great.

01:02:10I'm so concentrated on ways to make myself hornier.

01:02:13And that's like where my genius is coming from.

01:02:14I just want to be horny.

01:02:15That's great.

01:02:16Yeah, everyone's like, I want to get in the mind of Kazumi.

01:02:18And she's like, how do I get more dick?

01:02:19I love dick.

01:02:21Yeah.

01:02:21Okay, jerk mate segment.

01:02:22Who wants to be the fetishy and the fetisher?

01:02:27I'll be the fetishy.

01:02:28Ooh.

01:02:28Or wait.

01:02:29I'll do it.

01:02:30I'm a switch.

01:02:30I don't even know.

01:02:31I never said those words before.

01:02:32Who's the fetisher?

01:02:33The person with the fetisher?

01:02:35The person with the fetisher.

01:02:35Yeah, yeah.

01:02:36Yeah, sure.

01:02:37Okay.

01:02:37So I'm the fetisher.

01:02:38Yes.

01:02:38Okay.

01:02:38So I have a fetish and I need her to do it.

01:02:42Is that what we're doing?

01:02:43You got it.

01:02:44Action.

01:02:44Okay.

01:02:45Um, okay.

01:02:47So I need you to sit on your bare feet.

01:02:56No, on your butt.

01:02:57On your bare feet.

01:02:58Yes.

01:02:59All right, creators.

01:03:00Listen up.

01:03:00You're already killing it on socials, right?

01:03:02Fans, followers, likes.

01:03:03It's all love.

01:03:04You're on fire.

01:03:05But let me ask you this.

01:03:06Is your wallet feeling that love?

01:03:07If not, then check out fans revenue.

01:03:09And even if it is, check out fans revenue.

01:03:11Because that means you're about your business and you want to make more money.

01:03:13Whether you've got fans on Instagram, TikTok, or even OnlyFans, it doesn't matter.

01:03:17You can turn your fans into revenue.

01:03:20Likes are cool.

01:03:21Money is cooler.

01:03:22They do all the boring stuff and you just get paid.

01:03:25It's fucking easy.

01:03:26So hit up fans revenue and start cashing in.

01:03:28We have a link below.

01:03:29Fans revenue.

01:03:30It's the fucking shit.

01:03:31How do you think I just bought a new Mercedes?

01:03:33Fans revenue all fucking day.

01:03:34We love fans revenue.

01:03:35Let's get back to the show.

01:03:36Yeah.

01:03:37I like during sex when I tell the guy to like sit in the corner of bed and just jerk off.

01:03:41And just tell me what to do like Simon says.

01:03:43Yeah, that's cool.

01:03:43I've had some threesomes that ended up like that, which is kind of weird, where it starts

01:03:47out as like a wholesome threesome.

01:03:48And then the other girl just is like, I'm just going to go sit over here.

01:03:52And I've had that happen more than once where she's like, yeah, lots going on.

01:03:56And she touches or just watches?

01:03:58I've had both happen where it's like, she's like too much is going on maybe.

01:04:02And she's like, I'm just going to be over here.

01:04:05I'm like, bye-bye.

01:04:05Yeah.

01:04:06Sometimes I'm like, it's better to like have a nap.

01:04:08I've seen him take naps even.

01:04:09A chance to learn from you.

01:04:10Naps is crazy.

01:04:11Like no, either intimidated or learning.

01:04:14Yeah.

01:04:14Like either they're intimidated and they're intimidated and they want to learn or they're intimidated

01:04:18and they want to go to sleep.

01:04:19Okay.

01:04:20But you're, you're the unicorn.

01:04:22Uh, I wasn't, they were the unicorn.

01:04:25Oh, okay.

01:04:25Yeah.

01:04:26And I was like, that makes more sense.

01:04:27Cause I was going to say, if you were the unicorn because of my situation, where would

01:04:33the guy come?

01:04:33Would he have to be like, okay, babe, time to come.

01:04:36Oh, right.

01:04:36That would be awesome.

01:04:37By the way, I think unicorn, I think unicorn is primarily only used for males in a couple

01:04:44situation.

01:04:45Isn't it?

01:04:45Because a unicorn, like a, you know, oh yeah.

01:04:49But I understand what you're saying.

01:04:51I call it the assistant.

01:04:52Okay.

01:04:53Got it.

01:04:54So unicorn is the second boy.

01:04:57Yeah.

01:04:57Unicorn is the second boy and the assistant's the second girl.

01:05:00Yeah.

01:05:01Let's stick to that.

01:05:02And I can be like, Ooh, let me grab your titty while he's fucking you.

01:05:08Yo.

01:05:08Helpful assist.

01:05:09Sarah J.

01:05:11And, uh, I don't think we need to do the two other segments because they're not every

01:05:14week.

01:05:14But you're forgetting one thing, Ryan.

01:05:16Oh.

01:05:16The story of Kazamania.

01:05:17Well, I don't know if we should do it yet.

01:05:19Oh, okay.

01:05:21Because we're going to pretend this is going to come out after.

01:05:25Oh, okay.

01:05:26We had done something.

01:05:27Oh, yes.

01:05:28But you'll find out.

01:05:29I don't think we should talk about it.

01:05:31But you should pay attention.

01:05:32Should I hold my breath?

01:05:34Until you tell me.

01:05:35I'm naked and I'm getting fucked.

01:05:37Okay.

01:05:38Little teaser.

01:05:39And Ryan's there.

01:05:40I talk so much shit about directors.

01:05:43Question for the friends at home.

01:05:44Does anyone on earth like when a porn scene cuts directly to the guy's face?

01:05:51Only if he's equally as hot as the girl.

01:05:53If no straight man on earth votes yes, directors, we've got to talk.

01:05:58There's going to be some guys that think it's funny.

01:06:01Fair.

01:06:01But the funniness is not part of the boner.

01:06:03It is.

01:06:04It is.

01:06:05Okay.

01:06:05Think of Bounce.

01:06:07All these funny fucking pornos that are like, oh my God, you're just watching it not because

01:06:14it's hot.

01:06:15You can't tell me that the sex on Bounce is hot sex.

01:06:18No, you're right.

01:06:19I want to see that guy's face.

01:06:20No, you want to see that guy's face, right?

01:06:22Yeah.

01:06:23For sure.

01:06:23I'm with you.

01:06:24I'm with you.

01:06:24I need content.

01:06:26Yeah.

01:06:27What does that mean?

01:06:27Like a naughty video.

01:06:28Like a thing of like an ex-YouTube kind of thing.

01:06:31Yes.

01:06:31I don't know what you're talking about, but I'm sure it's a funny that is dirty.

01:06:35A dirty funny.

01:06:36Dirty funny.

01:06:37Yes.

01:06:38There you go.

01:06:38Like Kazumi fucked a guy with stage four cancer right here on this couch.

01:06:41It was beautiful.

01:06:42I also have had sex many times with stage four cancer.

01:06:46With a quadriplegic.

01:06:48How?

01:06:49I climbed on top of the wheelchair.

01:06:51Did you inject him?

01:06:53He was already handled.

01:06:54Like I didn't do it.

01:06:55He did it, I guess.

01:06:56Can he hear somebody else did it?

01:06:58Like it was already ready by the time I got there.

01:07:00So wait, hold on.

01:07:01How did he do that?

01:07:03He doesn't do anything.

01:07:05But how was his dick card?

01:07:07I don't, didn't ask.

01:07:09I didn't ask.

01:07:09Well, it's a pretty important thing to know.

01:07:11Where did this man come from?

01:07:12Like where, are you guys in a shed in Medellin?

01:07:14Wait, wait, wait.

01:07:15Was he paralyzed from like the ankles down?

01:07:18No, like quadriplegic is all four limbs.

01:07:21Quad's four.

01:07:21No.

01:07:22Quad.

01:07:22Nothing.

01:07:23He's a little nugget.

01:07:24Something's fishy about this story.

01:07:26Yeah.

01:07:26But like you can put like a foot on one wheel and a foot on the other wheel.

01:07:31Go to town.

01:07:32Wow.

01:07:33Yeah.

01:07:33Do you have any dreams you want to accomplish, you know, in your porn career?

01:07:38Like Angela White wants to fuck in space.

01:07:39Do you have anything like that?

01:07:41I think that would be awful, by the way.

01:07:44Because there's not enough friction.

01:07:46Oh.

01:07:46It would be like a waterbed.

01:07:48Like waterbeds are fucking terrible because there's not enough friction.

01:07:51It would be.

01:07:52Like when you push away, they would just go away.

01:07:55They wouldn't be able to push back.

01:07:56It's not as cool as you think.

01:07:57Like when you thrust at somebody in space, they're just going to go.

01:08:01Right.

01:08:01We would need some stabilizers.

01:08:02You know, that's going to be awful.

01:08:03Yeah, you hit her too hard and said, baby, come back.

01:08:06She goes into space.

01:08:07I would like to.

01:08:09I feel like such a horse saying this, but I feel like I'm in good company.

01:08:13I would definitely like to fuck a whole team, like at the same time.

01:08:15Oh, what sport?

01:08:17Any sport.

01:08:18That hasn't happened to you?

01:08:18Not a whole team?

01:08:20You know, NBA's got 13 people.

01:08:22NFL's got 52.

01:08:23Yeah, I don't care.

01:08:25It's fine.

01:08:26That's easy.

01:08:26You know, a doubles tennis team is too.

01:08:28You can stand in front of Staples Center.

01:08:32Well, that's boring.

01:08:33Yeah, team sounds hot.

01:08:34Because of the brotherhood bond that you'd give them?

01:08:37Yeah, I think I would make their team stronger.

01:08:40Wow.

01:08:41That's cool.

01:08:41Yeah.

01:08:42College or older?

01:08:43It doesn't matter.

01:08:44That's cool.

01:08:45It doesn't matter.

01:08:45It's a team.

01:08:46I want to be part of the team.

01:08:47I want to be like an inspiration for the team.

01:08:50Why don't you just go do it?

01:08:51Because then it wouldn't be as fantasy anymore.

01:08:54There's some things that you have to keep as fantasy because if not, you've got nothing

01:08:58fucking else to think about.

01:09:00You know?

01:09:00Don't you think it'd be so cool, though, if you did some kind of raffle?

01:09:04Whoever gets the best grades collectively.

01:09:07I don't.

01:09:09I'll be honest.

01:09:10Get everyone's grades up.

01:09:10I just want to fantasize about it.

01:09:11Be good for America.

01:09:12I just want to fantasize about it more than doing it.

01:09:14Because the thing is, once you do it, it's going to be a little...

01:09:18They're such a big business.

01:09:19When you actually do things, sometimes it diminishes the fantasy.

01:09:24Yeah, you're right.

01:09:25There's some celebrities that I've had sex with where I was like, oh, fuck.

01:09:28I can never, ever...

01:09:30I can never, ever partake in their art again.

01:09:33Can we please bleep the name?

01:09:34I can never participate in their industry.

01:09:36Sergei, give us one juicy name.

01:09:37Come on.

01:09:38All right.

01:09:39Well, guys, that is the longest episode in Pillow Talk history, four and a half years.

01:09:44We could have kept going for three hours.

01:09:46Way, way better than the first.

01:09:48I wish I said a whole thing, the whole first one.

01:09:51It was the same as what you saw.

01:09:52Oh, okay.

01:09:53It was like that before like 45 minutes.

01:09:54But it was funny.

01:09:55It was funny.

01:09:55It was super funny.

01:09:56And you know what?

01:09:58I know the YouTube comments are going to say like, it was so good, but that guy was meh,

01:10:02meh, meh.

01:10:03But now this is the make-do.

01:10:05That's fine.

01:10:06I want to say, thank you so much for Sarah J, man.

01:10:10Thank you for you.

01:10:11And how cool you are.

01:10:12Thank you for Ryan.

01:10:13I would love to have you on.

01:10:14Thank you for Kazumi.

01:10:15Yes.

01:10:16Thank you for Sarah J.

01:10:16Anytime in LA, please say, hey, I'm in LA.

01:10:18I'm coming on the show.

01:10:19By the way, you mentioned that you would have another female on as a co-host, right?

01:10:24And to be honest with you, I didn't want to give you any like clues, but she was one

01:10:29of my first thoughts.

01:10:30Probably like top three.

01:10:32Yeah.

01:10:32No, because I thought you would be interesting and like, we get along already.

01:10:36And stuff.

01:10:36Yeah, not too like rookie.

01:10:38And she's fun.

01:10:39She's super fun.

01:10:40Yeah.

01:10:40She's a bet.

01:10:40Like, I didn't tell you, but like, she was definitely top three in my head.

01:10:45Okay.

01:10:45Who's the other two just to win?

01:10:46I'm not going to tell you.

01:10:47But like, I was like, ooh, Kazumi should be in there.

01:10:49Okay, good.

01:10:50Yeah.

01:10:50Good job.

01:10:51Thanks, Sergey.

01:10:52Yay.

01:10:53Fucking awesome stuff.

01:10:54Love you both.

01:10:56Great episode.

01:10:56Love you both.

01:10:57Love you both.

01:10:58Love you both.

01:10:59Love you both.

01:11:00Love you both.

01:11:01Love you both.

01:11:02Love you both.

01:11:03Love you both.

01:11:04Love you both.

01:11:05Love you both.

01:11:06Love you both.

01:11:07Love you both.

01:11:08Love you both.

01:11:09Love you both.

01:11:10Love you both.

01:11:11Love you both.

01:11:12Love you both.

01:11:13Love you both.

01:11:14Love you both.

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