00:00So, what is dating like for you, being a porn star?
00:04Dating, at first, I felt like I didn't have any time to date.
00:10I was like, okay, like, this is all going so fast.
00:12I don't feel like I'm meeting so many new people, too.
00:16And, like, what if I don't choose the right one?
00:18Because, like, everyone seems so great at the beginning.
00:20And then you find out, like, that they have allegations and it's horrible.
00:24Did that happen to you?
00:26Oh, no.
00:27Thankfully.
00:28Well, I mean, even just seeing someone on set and thinking, like, oh, like, what a great guy.
00:32Yeah.
00:32Or, like, what a great woman.
00:34Yeah.
00:34Then it's just seeing stuff coming out on the internet.
00:37Oh, yeah.
00:37No, I've had people on my podcast where I'm just like, ooh.
00:40Like, you know, yeah, like, six months later.
00:42Oh, that's so scary.
00:44Maybe I should take that episode down.
00:46Right?
00:47That is so scary.
00:47Didn't know that at the time.
00:49Or, like, I've had to, like, cancel them because something came out.
00:53And I was like, oh.
00:54Oh, no.
00:55Yeah, it was so awkward.
00:56Oh, that is awful.
00:58Yeah.
00:59But dating, I think, is almost the same because I'm still the same person.
01:06I just have this added pressure of, like, what if someone wouldn't like that, like, my job, I guess.
01:17Which is a common problem, right?
01:20Yeah.
01:20Because most guys don't want to share their woman with other men, even if it's just a job.
01:26Right.
01:27And I think that dating, like, someone in the industry is so easy because you have someone that does understand.
01:35Like, okay, it's a job.
01:36And then we can talk about work.
01:38And then it's just work.
01:39And it's not, like, ugh.
01:42Like, because even, like, for me, like, I am, like, an extremely jealous person.
01:46Mm.
01:47So, like, I'm—
01:49So you don't think that you could date a male performer?
01:51Oh, I think it would depend because if it was, like, I don't know, it would really depend.
02:02Yeah.
02:02There would have to be someone that's, like, very, very good at communication and, like, I know is, like, super business and not, like—
02:10Yeah.
02:11—just la, la, la.
02:12Yeah, yeah, yeah.
02:13All the time, but—
02:14Yeah, no, I understand.
02:15Yeah.
02:16Possibly.
02:18No, I get it.
02:19I get it.
02:19I mean, it's okay to, like, recognize that, you know, maybe it wouldn't easily go both ways for you.
02:26Yeah.
02:27Right?
02:27Because you are dating somebody now, but they're not a performer.
02:30Right.
02:31It just ends up working.
02:32Mm-hmm.
02:33It just ends up working so much easier because, yeah, they know that it's just a job and we are able to talk about work.
02:41And, yeah, it's great.
02:43Before you met him, did you try to date other guys and had issues or were you just working so much you were, like, I'm not even looking?
02:50Well, I had, like, little crushes, but they were married or already had girlfriends and, like, I didn't want to overstep or anything.
03:00And I had—I am someone that will fall in love with anyone that's nice to me.
03:06So, like, I'll have, like, an intense crush for, like, a day and then find out, you know, like, oh, they're married or, like, they have a girlfriend.
03:14Okay, cool.
03:14We're just, like, really good friends then.
03:16Yeah.
03:16So, I had, like, little crushes and stuff like that.
03:19But then, yeah, I never really wanted to date.
03:23Right.
03:23And so now with the relationship that you have, do you guys ever have jealousy issues that come up?
03:29Like, when do you know that you need to communicate about something?
03:35I think that it's really trial and error.
03:39So, we'll talk about boundaries, like, and then not realize—even, like, if you don't realize that something is a boundary until it happens, like, that's okay.
03:51But, hey, next time, like, this is a boundary for me.
04:01But you just have to constantly keep talking.
04:05Yeah.
04:05And that's what it's—that's the only way it's going to work in this industry is if you just constantly are updating each other and talking and communicating about, like, what you're okay with and what you're not and, like, what you want and expect and everything.
04:22Yeah.
04:22I remember when I was interviewing—I think it was Jet setting Jasmine, and she's, you know, in a relationship with King Noir.
04:28I've had them both on, both amazing guests.
04:31And I remember her—because they have an open relationship and they both perform.
04:34And I remember her talking to me about how, yeah, like, boundaries and consent is fluid and it changes.
04:41Yes.
04:41And I don't know why I had never thought about that before.
04:43I think because I'm in, like, a pretty, like, vanilla monogamous relationship where, like, you know, we don't—we're not with other people.
04:50We're just with each other.
04:51Yeah.
04:51So, like, it feels like that, like, feels simple, I guess.
04:54But, you know, she talked about, I think, like, when—because she's had a couple of kids with him.
04:59When she's pregnant, she needs, like, him more, right?
05:03And, like, she's not as open to him dating other girls.
05:08Right.
05:08And, like, that's okay because they talk about that.
05:10And then, you know, when she's at a different stage in her life, it might change.
05:13And I don't know why it had never occurred to me that, yeah, of course, like, boundaries might change.
05:19Yeah, entirely.
05:21And that, like, that constant communication is, like, so important.
05:24Even, like, with—between partners, like, if you are with someone different, like, your boundaries can be different.
05:32Yeah.
05:33And that's something that I've had to learn.
05:35And, like, okay, like, with you, like, even just with performing, it's like, okay, with you, I know that, like, you know, you do this right or, like, you do this this way.
05:44So, like, I don't have that boundary with you like I would with someone else.
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