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00:31Hello, everybody. Welcome to Countdown, not just the first show of the week, but the first show of October.
00:37Thank you so, so much for tuning in. How are you, Rachel Riley?
00:40Very well. How are you?
00:41I'm great because today is World Farm Animals Day.
00:45Hooray!
00:46Started back in the day to highlight mistreatment of animals and it's kind of morphed into a real celebration.
00:52I'm a city kid. You were a town kid. I remember the first kind of school trip to the farm.
00:59It was like going to Australia. I loved it so much. Do you remember those days?
01:03Yeah, I mean, farms have changed so much these days with toddlers.
01:06I mean, I think it's like every fortnight that we go to a farm.
01:09Really?
01:09And back then, you know, the highlight was feeding the animals.
01:11You get the animal grub and you feed them and that's, you know, you look at the animals and that's it.
01:15There's like a teeny tiny gift shop.
01:16Now, there's drop slides, there's soft play, you can pet the guinea pigs and the rabbits and you can, there's just everything.
01:25You can go on the tractors.
01:26Wow.
01:27There's, the last one I saw, there was a goat, goat racing.
01:30Do you want some cow jokes throughout the show?
01:32I mean...
01:32Any time you feel that it's dropping?
01:34Whether I want them or not.
01:35OK.
01:36Where do cows go to dance?
01:39A barn dance.
01:40The meatball.
01:41Ah!
01:42Ah!
01:42My work is done.
01:44Let's introduce...
01:44Oh, no!
01:46Oh, no.
01:47Can we have vegan frozen cakes, please?
01:51That's it.
01:51That's it.
01:52Show's done.
01:53We've already done what we needed to do.
01:54Right, let's introduce Dictionary Corner.
01:56But seriously, any cow joke you want, let me know.
01:59Looking over at Dictionary Corner then, there she is, grazing on cups of tea and various hidden chocolate bars.
02:05She's below the desk.
02:06It's our guardian of the dictionary, Susie Dent.
02:09I'm back in Dictionary Corner, but first time with me, such a thrill.
02:13It's about time we had some genuine Northern Irish talent on this show.
02:17Some would say when it comes to Northern Irish entertainment, she is the goat.
02:21Welcome back.
02:22Gloria Honeyford.
02:24Thank you very much.
02:25I don't know about, see, we come from the same country.
02:27You don't write, you don't ring, nothing.
02:30I have to depend on the producer of this programme to have me up here.
02:33So, I've got a cow story.
02:35My granny used to have a farm just outside Portadine where I lived.
02:39And we used to drive the cows to the bull.
02:42But I didn't quite understand what they did when I got there.
02:45But anyway, I soon learned.
02:48I reckon you'd learn about the birds and the bees quick if you grew up on a farm or visited it every week.
02:53Right, Gloria.
02:54Well, listen, you may see an octo-champ crowned this week.
02:57Our champion is five wins.
02:58Our Ben Bazzard is back with a haircut.
03:02I got a haircut too, you know.
03:03You're smart, Colin.
03:04But as a former military man, you've went for the proper, you mean business.
03:08Let's go.
03:08That's it.
03:09So, ready for a good week, hopefully.
03:11Well, listen, just three more wins needed.
03:13Your first opponent, one game at a time, is David Ashton from Ellesmere Port.
03:17How are you, sir?
03:18Fine, thanks, Colin.
03:19Good.
03:20Nice to have you here.
03:21You're going to love this.
03:23Tell us all about Aunty Mary.
03:25Well, Aunty Mary is my late father's sister.
03:30And she lives in Dublin, in Ireland.
03:33And she'll be 102 on the 25th of October.
03:37Wow.
03:38And every Friday I phone her up and we always talk about Countdown because she watches Countdown every day.
03:44She loves it.
03:45Wow.
03:45102 years this month.
03:47Aunt Mary, this whole show is for you, whether he wins or not.
03:51So, thank you very much for tuning in.
03:53We're just great to have you.
03:55David and Ben, best of luck.
03:58Let's do it for Aunt Mary, Ben.
04:00Let's not let her down.
04:01Here we go.
04:03Hello, Rachel.
04:04Hi, Ben.
04:04Can I please start with a consonant?
04:06Start the week with D.
04:08And another one.
04:11N.
04:12And another one.
04:14S.
04:15And a vowel, please.
04:17O.
04:18And a second vowel.
04:20E.
04:21And another vowel.
04:23A.
04:25And a consonant.
04:28R.
04:29And another consonant.
04:32F.
04:33And a vowel, please.
04:37Lastly, O.
04:39At home, man in the studio.
04:41Let's play Countdown.
04:54Interesting start, eh? How many, Ben?
05:14Six.
05:15And David?
05:16A risky seven.
05:17A risky seven. Ben, you're six.
05:20Reason.
05:21What's this risky seven?
05:23Ordains, but I don't think I've spelled it right.
05:25Ordains.
05:26Oh, you need the A-I-N-S there.
05:28Yeah, I'm sorry about that, David.
05:31So, I'm surprised the six stands with those letters,
05:35so I've got big expectations, Susie and Gloria.
05:38That was tough, actually.
05:39Actually, I worked out one.
05:40Sooner.
05:41Yes.
05:42Yes.
05:42Very nice.
05:43I'll take that, but what else?
05:45Snored.
05:45What else do we find?
05:46Snored is another six, but seven was as much as we could do with snuffed,
05:50to eat something greedily as she snuffed down her sandwich.
05:53Oh, is that what it means?
05:54It's a lovely sounding word, isn't it?
05:56It is, actually.
05:57Yeah.
05:58The evolving words.
05:59As always, David, do you want to pick us nine letters?
06:01Hi, Rachel.
06:02Hi, David.
06:03Can I have a consonant, please?
06:04You can, indeed.
06:06S.
06:07Another one, please.
06:09M.
06:10And a third.
06:12G.
06:13And a fourth.
06:15T.
06:16And a fifth.
06:18L.
06:20Vowel.
06:22U.
06:23And another.
06:25I.
06:26And another.
06:29E.
06:30And another.
06:31And the last one.
06:33A.
06:34And 30 seconds.
06:35I.
06:38I.
06:51I.
06:52How many, David?
07:07Seven.
07:08And Ben?
07:09Risky eight.
07:10And a risky eight.
07:11David, the seven?
07:12Lie gates.
07:13Ben?
07:14Stimuli.
07:15Stimuli!
07:16It's definitely the I at the end of stimuli,
07:19and I don't think you can...
07:21You can't spell it with the A-E.
07:23I'm sorry about that.
07:23You're going to hate this, because we've got a definite eight.
07:28Simulate.
07:29Stimuli, the simulates, not that big a jump.
07:31Nice one.
07:32Sorry.
07:34Well, look at that.
07:35The two safe choices have done the point scoring so far.
07:39Simulates, brilliant.
07:40Anything else?
07:40Yeah.
07:41Ugliest for seven.
07:42We'll leave that one.
07:43There you go.
07:43Let's move the numbers, and you're choosing, Ben.
07:46Rachel, could we have three from the top, please?
07:48We can indeed.
07:49Three and three.
07:50First one of the month.
07:51Numbers are as follows.
07:53Two, five, three, and the big ones.
07:5750, 75 and 25.
08:00And the target to reach?
08:02622.
08:03622.
08:04Numbers up.
08:04We'll see you next time.
08:18We'll see you next time.
08:18Give me a number, Ben.
08:36622.
08:37And David?
08:39618.
08:40618.
08:41Ben, off you go.
08:4375, subtract 50.
08:4525.
08:46Multiply the 25.
08:48625.
08:49And subtract 3.
08:50Yep.
08:51622.
08:52Lovely.
08:53APPLAUSE
08:53Exciting first part.
08:57Let's get our first tea time teaser of the week.
08:59It's Air Salon.
09:01Air Salon.
09:02It's not the Orinoco flow, but it's something similar.
09:05It's not the Orinoco flow, but it's something similar.
09:08Welcome back.
09:24Air Salon becomes Orinazel.
09:27It's not the Orinoco flow, but it's something similar.
09:30I'm sorry to do this to you.
09:31First tea time teaser of the week.
09:33Orinazel.
09:34Yes.
09:34So, it's rare, so you'll be happy with that.
09:38It means connecting the mouth and the nose.
09:39So, the Ori bit is the mouth and nasal, obviously, the nose.
09:43So, it's something that involves the both.
09:45Anatomy or surgery.
09:46Yeah.
09:47Let's swiftly move on.
09:48David, get me out of this.
09:50Can I have a consonant, please?
09:51Thanks, David.
09:52B.
09:54And another one, please.
09:56R.
09:57And another one.
09:59L.
10:00And a fourth.
10:02P.
10:03And a fifth.
10:05W.
10:07Vowel, please.
10:08O.
10:09And another.
10:11E.
10:12And another.
10:15I.
10:17And another, please.
10:18And the last one.
10:20E.
10:21Thanks, Rich.
10:21Bye-bye.
10:39Which, if you can see Liz.
10:39I'll see you.
10:40Bye-bye.
10:40Bye-bye.
10:40Bye-bye.
10:41Bye-bye.
10:42Bye.
10:42Bye-bye.
10:49Bye-bye.
10:52That's time David six I think he thinks six Ben
10:57Seven and he knows seven David. What's the six? Lope here. I'm Ben
11:03Blowier yeah blowier soos yes blowier in and the adjective with loping about is loping
11:11So yeah, I'm so sorry David no lope. Yeah, okay anything else for me Gloria
11:16Mine was blowier as well. So I think I was looking at your pad really
11:22Little bit of Monday afternoon cheating to kick off the week
11:26Ben start with a consonant please. Thank you, Ben D and another one
11:32G and another consonant
11:36ah and a vowel oh
11:40And another vowel a and a third vowel a
11:46and a consonant
11:49T and another consonant
11:53H and
11:55A consonant to finish with please lastly D and half a minute
12:00I
12:03I
12:05I
12:07I
12:09I
12:11I
12:13I
12:16I
12:18I
12:20I
12:22I
12:24I
12:26I
12:28I
12:30I
12:32I
12:46I
12:48I
12:50I
12:53I
12:55I
12:57I
12:59I
13:01I
13:08I
13:10I
13:12I
13:14I
13:25I
13:27I
13:29I
13:31I
13:47I
13:49I
13:51I
13:53I
13:54I
13:55I
13:56I
14:10I
14:12I
14:13I
14:15I
14:17I
14:19I
14:20I
14:21I
14:23I
14:25I
14:38I
14:40I
14:42I
14:44I
14:46I
14:48I
14:50I
14:51I
14:52I
14:53I
14:54I
14:56I
14:57I
14:58I
14:59I
15:00I
15:01I
15:02I
15:03I
15:04I
15:29the twain shall meet but when I went to Canada nobody asked my religion and I
15:33realised that all creeds all colors everybody could live together and that
15:38changed my horizon forever so that was the greatest thing and I stayed there
15:43for about a year did you have to move to London originally then well I was given
15:46the job I mean I was I was never thinking of going to London but I was
15:49doing a nightly news program between 6 and 7 bombs bullets barricades and it
15:55was a tricky time for everybody I was bringing up children as many people but
15:59not in place like the Falls Road or Shankle Road so we were out of town a bit but
16:04nevertheless you'd watch the telly and you think oh my goodness that's going on
16:0810 miles down the road and of course you had to have a much stronger grip on where
16:13your children were and what they were doing at that time but I'm really glad
16:17going back to your point about Canada I was so glad that a wonderful country like
16:22that and Czechoslovak and Russia and it didn't matter what religion that had
16:26just cleared my mind forever yeah and that was good gonna love our chats this
16:30week it's so nice to see you love you Chuck the game close enough let me tell you
16:37Ben going for a sixth when he's only 16 points ahead as you pick these letters a
16:42consonant please Rachel thank you Ben and and another consonant Y and another
16:50consonant N and a vowel I and another vowel please O and another vowel I and a
17:02consonant R and another consonant V and a final consonant and a final S start the clock
17:14the clock
17:17oh
17:18oh
17:20oh
17:22oh
17:26oh
17:28oh
17:32oh
17:33oh
17:37oh
17:39that's time Ben six David six okay even Stevens give me the words vision
17:51yep senior are you spelling it s-i-n-o-i-r yes it's s-i-g-n-i-o-r I mean lots of
18:00different spellings for senior but not that one
18:03back to school it is it is the national TV thing it is honestly you look at things and you second
18:16guess them and you settle down as the show goes on you're doing very well so far let me tell you
18:21thank you six points though for Ben this was a tricky one I thought I just got vision the same
18:26is your good self yeah yeah there is a seven there from microbiology virions v-i-r-i-o-n-s same
18:35route as a virus because it's the infective form of a virus outside its host I always know when you
18:43go microbiology it's been a difficult round yeah yeah any of the sciences to get a seven means it's
18:48been a toffee let's make this one a bit easier David a consonant please Rachel thank you David
18:54M and another one please and D and a third T and vowel please you and another I and a third please oh
19:11and a fourth a consonant R and another consonant please and lastly
19:24here we go
19:54David um six Ben seven six says David a virtual and the seven dilator well inquisitive look in your
20:08face but I think that's fine yes very good and so a dilator muscle would be something like the pupil
20:14of your eyes that sort of you know opens dilates as we know so very good indeed beautiful yeah beautiful
20:19shout I'm assuming Gloria auditor auditor is another good one yes nice seven yeah there you go all right
20:25very nice indeed shall we switch back let's do it another numbers round for us what you're going to
20:31do Ben Rachel can we have one from the top this time please we can in see you just a more straightforward
20:36potentially one large five little and for this round your little numbers are ten nine six three and nine
20:45a large one fifty and the target six hundred and sixty six six zero numbers up
20:52so
20:55that's it
20:59so
21:01that's it
21:07that's it Ben
21:22uh six sixty yeah and David six sixty well done both to you Ben off you go six over three two nine add nine eighteen take away the two sixteen add the fifteen
21:35The 2. 16. Add the 50. 66.
21:38And times that by 10. 660, well done. Yes. David?
21:429 plus 3 is 12. Yep. Times 50 is 600. Yep.
21:47And 6 by 10 is 60 and add it on. Lovely.
21:49Quite a few ways for this one. Ten points apiece. Nice.
21:52APPLAUSE
21:55So there you go today, time for a second break.
21:57Rach, always a good time to make a cup of tea or possibly a coffee.
22:02Speaking of coffee, what do you call a cow that drinks too much coffee?
22:11Over-caffeinated. Oh, gosh.
22:15Just doing our tea time teaser. Plot fish. Plot fish.
22:18You plot to take a fish without paying for it.
22:21You plot to take a fish without paying for it.
22:32Very good. Shoplift. Shoplift.
22:35Right, six rounds to go. Not unsalvageable for our challenger, David Ashton.
22:41And you're picking these letters, mate.
22:41Can I have a vowel, please, there, Rachael? Thank you, David. E.
22:50And a consonant. C.
22:52And another one, please. S.
22:54And another one. T.
23:08And a vowel, please. U.
23:13Consonant, please.
23:17And another one. G.
23:23Vowel, please. A.
23:29And another vowel, please.
23:34And another vowel, please.
23:38A final E.
23:40Let's play.
23:42–
23:54T.
24:01David. Seven. Very good. Ben.
24:16Stick with a six. The six is? Agents.
24:19David, on stage. I think unstaged, unstageable is in.
24:25Oh, you're not having much luck today, but no unstage on its own.
24:28Anything else? Basically empathetic.
24:31I just saw stun on the board, and that was it.
24:36Well, I know what you mean.
24:37Thank goodness my pal here is much better than me.
24:40Something you never want to do to your cow, encages, is there?
24:45No, you see the link there? Very good.
24:47Farm day, cow, marvellous.
24:49Not a great link, but a link nonetheless for encages.
24:53Tunage is there. I love the word, tunage, you know.
24:55You're a song that you love.
24:58OK, Ben, you're on song today.
25:00More letters.
25:01Consonant, please, Rachel.
25:02Thank you, Ben.
25:03F.
25:04And another consonant.
25:06T.
25:07And a third consonant.
25:09D.
25:10And a vowel.
25:11I.
25:12And another vowel, please.
25:14O.
25:15And another vowel.
25:16A.
25:17And a consonant.
25:19N.
25:19And a consonant.
25:22J.
25:23And a consonant.
25:25And lastly, N.
25:27Kind dine.
25:27And a consonant.
25:28And a consonant.
25:29And a consonant.
25:29And a consonant.
25:30And a consonant.
25:30And a consonant.
25:30And a consonant.
25:31And a consonant.
25:31And a consonant.
25:32And a consonant.
25:32And a consonant.
25:33And a consonant.
25:33And a consonant.
25:33And a consonant.
25:34And a consonant.
25:34And a consonant.
25:34And a consonant.
25:35And a consonant.
25:35And a consonant.
25:36And a consonant.
25:36And a consonant.
25:37And a consonant.
25:37And a consonant.
25:37And a consonant.
25:38And a consonant.
25:38And a consonant.
25:39And a consonant.
25:39And a consonant.
25:40And a consonant.
25:41And a consonant.
25:41And a consonant.
25:42And a consonant.
25:42And a consonant.
25:43And a consonant.
25:43And a consonant.
25:44And a consonant.
25:45And a consonant.
25:58Ben? Seven. And David? Six.
26:02The six is? Adjoint. And the seven? Adjoint.
26:07Yes, adjoint.
26:09I'm wondering if Rachel can help me out with this definition, actually.
26:13It's from maths. To be adjoint is...
26:17..it's of a functional quantity related to a given functional quantity
26:21by a particular process of transposition.
26:24What's that, babe? What is that? Yeah, exactly.
26:26It existed in linear algebra and stuff.
26:30That's all about... I remember of it. Yeah.
26:32I think it's all about maybe cofactors and that kind of thing.
26:35Something that is running parallel, that's my best effect.
26:37Well, it's a word. Yeah.
26:39It's the main thing. If Gloria and I pretend they understand,
26:42can we move on? No, no, I've got fondant. Excuse me.
26:45Much better. Can't move on without me going fondant,
26:48cos I like the taste of it. Oh, me too. Much better.
26:51Nice sevens. Nice sevens.
26:54All right, let's stay in dictionary corner for more explanations.
26:57First origins and words of the week.
26:59Suze?
27:00Yes, I know. It's too early for a tipple.
27:03It is not coiffed hide yet.
27:05You're not completely sure about that, Colin,
27:07but I was going to talk about the origin of being on the wagon.
27:10And, you know, if we talk about being on the wagon when we're abstaining from alcohol,
27:15but what was the wagon in question?
27:17Well, long before prohibition, there was a real grassroots movement
27:22to temper the perceived evils of alcohol.
27:24And we've seen this throughout history.
27:26We know about the sort of gin problem that was in London
27:30that really sort of, you know, became a central preoccupation for government, etc.
27:35And in the US, the Anti-Saloon League, amongst many others,
27:39persuaded members to pledge sobriety for their entire lifetime
27:44because it was thought to give a better character
27:47to restore good morality in society.
27:50And around the same time, it was very common in cities
27:53to see water carts going around, and they would essentially water
27:56the very, very dusty streets.
27:58It wasn't drinkable water at this point,
28:01but the idea, perhaps, because this was such a common sight,
28:04is that as a good kind of reference point
28:07for only drinking water and not drinking alcohol,
28:10people would then say, I'm on the water wagon,
28:13meaning I'm not drinking anything.
28:15And the water bit eventually dropped off,
28:17and that was why we will say on the wagon today.
28:20And it's lasted for a very long time, even though wagons, obviously,
28:23and water wagons, not a common sight for us.
28:25Nice. Thank you. So there you go.
28:27APPLAUSE
28:29Right, four rounds to go. David, you're up, my friend.
28:32Can I have a consonant, please, Rachel?
28:34Thank you, David. P.
28:37And another one, please.
28:39C.
28:41Vowel, please.
28:43I.
28:45And another.
28:46E.
28:48And another.
28:50U.
28:53A consonant.
28:55R.
28:56R.
28:57R.
28:58And another, please.
28:59R.
29:00R.
29:01R.
29:02R.
29:03R.
29:04R.
29:05R.
29:06R.
29:07R.
29:08R.
29:09R.
29:10R.
29:11R.
29:12R.
29:13R.
29:14R.
29:15R.
29:16R.
29:17R.
29:27R.
29:28R.
29:29R.
29:30R.
29:31R.
29:32R.
29:33R.
29:34R.
29:47R.
29:48R.
29:49R.
29:50R.
29:51R.
29:52R.
29:53R.
29:54R.
29:55R.
29:56R.
29:57R.
29:58R.
29:59R.
30:00R.
30:01R.
30:02R.
30:03R.
30:04R.
30:05R.
30:06R.
30:07R.
30:08R.
30:09R.
30:10R.
30:11R.
30:12R.
30:13R.
30:14R.
30:15R.
30:16R.
30:17R.
30:18R.
30:19R.
30:20R.
30:21R.
30:22R.
30:23R.
30:24R.
30:25R.
30:26R.
30:27R.
30:28R.
30:29R.
30:30R.
30:31R.
30:32R.
30:33R.
30:34R.
30:35R.
30:36R.
30:37R.
30:38R.
30:39R.
30:40R.
30:41R.
30:42R.
30:43R.
30:44Yep, lost letters.
31:14Gave me a number, Ben.
31:19Try an eight.
31:20OK, and David?
31:21Eight.
31:22Eight.
31:22What are you trying, Ben?
31:24Tinklers.
31:25Tinklers!
31:27The mind boggles.
31:29David?
31:29Lankiest.
31:30Yes.
31:31Now, lankiest we're good with.
31:32Yes, we are.
31:33I thought that's what Ben was going to go for,
31:34so it came out first eight letters.
31:36But you've went for tinklers.
31:39Yes.
31:40So, in various dialects,
31:42Scottish, Irish, English,
31:44person who makes a living by mending pot,
31:47so a bit like a tinker, almost.
31:50So that's the first one,
31:51but I have to say,
31:52it can also be a person who tinkles.
31:54So, we probably prefer that one, don't we?
31:57So, yeah, in the dictionary.
31:58Last numbers, David, your chosen.
32:00As hard as possible, please, Rachel.
32:02Right, OK, we can either do
32:04another four large or six small.
32:05I think they're the hardest.
32:06Four large, please.
32:07Four large.
32:07Two little ones.
32:08Two little ones.
32:09All right, come on then, David,
32:10just for a bit of fun.
32:11Final numbers today.
32:12Eight and five,
32:14and then we've got 75,
32:1650,
32:17100,
32:18and 25,
32:19and the target,
32:20690.
32:22690, last numbers.
32:426.90, David?
32:566.80.
32:5710 away, Ben.
32:586.90.
32:59That didn't work, David.
33:01No.
33:01It didn't work.
33:02Off you go, Ben.
33:0475 times 8.
33:06600.
33:07Add 100.
33:08700.
33:0950 over 5.
33:10Well done.
33:11And subtract that.
33:116.90.
33:12Lovely.
33:1510 points up for grabs here.
33:17David, Ben, fingers on the buzzers as we reveal today's Countdown Conundrum.
33:35Ben, for the century.
33:37Mockingly.
33:38Mockingly.
33:39Let's confirm.
33:40Brilliant.
33:406 wins in the bag.
33:44We will see you tomorrow.
33:46David, been of nerves early on, I think?
33:48Yeah, I think so, yeah.
33:49David, delighted to have you here.
33:50Thank you so much.
33:51Thanks very much, Carl.
33:51I've enjoyed it.
33:53Lovely.
33:53Really enjoyed it.
33:54And Ben, we'll see you tomorrow.
33:55Thank you, Colin.
33:55And, Gloria and Susie, too.
33:57See you tomorrow.
33:57Well, you don't get rid of me that easily.
33:59Yes.
34:00We wouldn't want to.
34:01I'll be here.
34:02Now, Rachel, I've been deliberately telling bad cow jokes to build up to the last cow joke,
34:08which is magnificent.
34:10Right.
34:11Right.
34:12Right.
34:13Why can't cows wear shoes?
34:16Why, Colin?
34:17Why?
34:18Because they lactose.
34:21On behalf of the whole Countdown team, I'd like to apologise to Aunty Mary and anyone else who's been affected by the quality of the jokes in this programme.
34:27You'll be telling someone that joke tonight.
34:29You know you will.
34:30We'll see you tomorrow, Ian.
34:31Count on us.
34:32You can contact the programme by email at countdown at channel4.com.
34:38You can also find our webpage at channel4.com forward slash countdown.
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