00:00Chris Cooper dresses like he's got a lifetime subscription to Classic Dad Looks Monthly.
00:14Roast Chris Cooper. Chris Cooper has perfected the grumpy neighbor who's seen it all.
00:23It's surprising he hasn't been cast as a parking enforcement officer yet. His face alone could
00:28probably shut down a party faster than any bouncer. Would I agree? Somebody nailed it.
00:40John, you gotta park your boats and your broken down cars in the backyard so all my friends who
00:48I have over for lunch can see him. Thank you. What can Chris Cooper do better?
01:01Chris Cooper could maybe lighten up a bit like throw in a smile or two so we know he's not just
01:08auditioning to be everyone's intimidating uncle.
01:11Also mixing up the stern authority figure. Vibe wouldn't hurt. We get it. You're serious.
01:20Kind of totally wrong. Well, I won an academy award having done a comic piece. There.
01:31Roast Chris Cooper's fashion. Chris Cooper dresses like he's got a lifetime subscription to Classic
01:45Dad Looks Monthly. He rocks that. I'm here to remind you to mow the lawn. Vibe like it's haute couture,
01:55proving you don't need a fashion statement when you've got a serious glare.
01:58I could go with that. Can you say something nice about Chris Cooper?
02:11Chris Cooper has the rare talent of making you believe he's both the toughest guy in the room
02:17and the one who secretly baked the best cookies. Oh, God. I could only pray that. I have really
02:24tried to work against appearing to be a tough guy in the room, but I see what you mean.
02:31Thanks, Esquire, for having me. Thanks a bunch.
02:54Good luck today.
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