00:00Hey, the kitchen's closed!
00:17Wait, that's not culinary equipment.
00:22Come on in.
00:23Hey!
00:24I'm Captain Wolfbeard O'Brady with the Dread Crew of Oddwood, and we're on tour with Aether
00:28Realm, Trollfest, and Tear on the Battle Ballads Tour in 2024.
00:33Welcome to the Dread Tour Bus of Oddwood.
00:36This is where our driver, Lucas, lives pretty much all the time.
00:40We've got these sad plants that work as an analogy for our own livelihoods.
00:44They're slowly wilting as the tour goes on, just like our testicles.
00:48This bed is also where Lucas lives sometimes, as well as our bass player, Rifles Pete.
00:53Not to be confused with our drummer, Pistols Pete.
00:56It generally seems pretty dangerous, but they're okay with it, so I am too.
01:00Nothing to see up here except used sheets, used condoms, and some crusty socks.
01:05What you see right here is the common area.
01:07We do a lot of our best arguing and shitting all over the floor in this sort of space.
01:11This doubles as a bed that our fuckin' quartermaster, Stark, sleeps on.
01:15It's a bed for a child, so it fits him quite nicely.
01:17And this stupid table.
01:18Oh, great tour hack.
01:20If you've got some pirate-themed laptops, this keeps them from slippin' all over the place.
01:23But this is also the bed for our other bosun.
01:26I mean, only bosun, Deckard Cordwain.
01:28It turns into a bed.
01:29Or sometimes, if he's drunk enough, he just kinda sleeps on it like this.
01:33We here at the Dread Crew of Oddwoods are fans of fine coffee and other things.
01:36Like these delicious La Cabra roasts.
01:39And whatever the fuck this mousse juice is called.
01:42And here you have our pantry.
01:44You can see in this sad little fuckin' cabinet, we've got a bunch of honey, peanut butter,
01:48and nuts.
01:49Which, just like the sailors at sea at old, we subside largely on salty nuts all fuckin'
01:53day.
01:54Oh, down here we got a banana.
01:56That seems out of place.
01:57We got some fuckin' bread and shit.
01:59We've got some delicious bread from this mystery place over here.
02:02And then this is we generally use to heat shit up and whatever.
02:05This television doesn't seem to work very well, but everything else is pretty hokey-dokey
02:09okay.
02:10And to explain the delicacies of coffee preparation, we bring you our resident coffee expert, Sark Cordwain.
02:21Coffee at venues is bullshit.
02:23Coffee at McDonald's is bullshit.
02:25This coffee, right here, won't be bullshit.
02:29Hundred percent delicious.
02:31Every good AeroPress recipe requires agitation.
02:33This is my agitation stick.
02:35Run down.
02:38And here you have our fridge.
02:40Full of bullshit.
02:42We got some water in case we need it.
02:44We've got this delicious labna which we smear on each other before going to bed every night.
02:48We've got some orange juice to prevent scurvy and other diseases.
02:51Some smuckers for some reason, but that's okay.
02:53These berries that have been there literally the whole time and we've never fuckin' eaten
02:56them.
02:57We've also got these Red Bulls in case you need a little fuckin' shot to the butt before
02:59you start your set.
03:01You might notice that there is no beer in this fridge, and that is because here at the
03:05Dread Crew of Udder, we do not drink our beer.
03:08We drink your beer.
03:09Now give me your beer!
03:11Another good tour bus hack is to keep your filthy fuckin' shoes in one of these cheap
03:14little racks that you can buy pretty much fuckin' anywhere.
03:17It keeps mud from getting all over the floor and eventually into your fuckin' clothes.
03:21And here we have our shower.
03:23You can see that because we don't shower, it's full of merchandise.
03:27Similarly, our bathroom is also full of fuckin' merchandise.
03:31Because we don't shower or poop apparently, and that's just the way it is.
03:35And here you have the bedroom in the back.
03:38This is where the magic happens.
03:39Pistols Pete and I sleep here.
03:41It's also got a fuckin' accordion, a bunch of goddamn clothes, extra fuckin' mugs, a
03:45goddamn bunch of pirate bullshit that you can find pretty much everywhere.
03:48And here we got some more pirate bullshit.
03:51Back there, nothing.
03:52But I did scrape the ever-loving fuck out of my head sitting up into this bed.
03:56It's not so bad anymore, really.
03:58But the piece of skin that came off is still floating around here somewhere.
04:02Maybe you'll be the one to find it.
04:04I hope you've enjoyed this tour of the Dread Bus of Oddwood.
04:07You can find our music online pretty much fuckin' anywhere, whether it be Spotify, Apple
04:11Music, Instagram, Facebook for some reason.
04:15Just fuckin' type in Oddwood.
04:16That's O-D-D-W-O-O-D.
04:19We are called the Dread Crew of Oddwood, but we'll answer to pretty much anything.
04:23So keep a weather eye on the horizon for more music and more tour dates in a city near you.
04:28Now if you'd kindly fuck off, I need to touch my wiener.
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