“I’m a 36-Year-Old Virgin and I’d Rather Have a Saturday Night in With a Pudding Than Go to the Pub”

Real Fix

Credit: SWNS  Meet the 35-year-old virgin who has never been kissed because she picks nights in with cake over socialising.  Anya Panchal, 36, has spent most of her adulthood alone and considers herself ''left on the shelf''.  Despite wanting to meet a partner, she has never been on a date and chooses to eat pudding at home over going to the pub.

Transcript

00:00 Being a virgin, it just makes me feel in other people's shadows.

00:03 I never thought I would like to jump into bed with you, or you.

00:07 I never thought that.

00:08 My name's Anya.

00:18 I'm quite a lonely person. I'm almost 36 and I've never had a boyfriend.

00:24 I've never been with anybody. I've got no experience with men.

00:27 I've been single my whole life.

00:29 I'm a virgin.

00:31 Being a virgin, it just makes me feel in other people's shadows.

00:37 Most of my friends, yeah, we were really pally when we were young.

00:40 But when they got married and had kids, I sort of felt like I was left behind.

00:43 I had depression from the age of 16 to 21.

00:46 I didn't think I would have a physical relationship because I didn't really see men in that sort of way.

00:50 Like, I'm a bit asexual or whatever.

00:52 I've always felt like I can't trust men. I've always felt like I can't touch men.

00:56 I never thought I would like to jump into bed with you, or you.

00:59 I never thought that.

01:00 When people hear I'm still a virgin, they sort of ghost me.

01:08 They say things like, "Oh, but somebody your age should have had a reasonable number of partners by now."

01:14 Or they say, "Oh, but you're so pretty. You should attract somebody. You have a nice figure and things."

01:18 Because I didn't really go out very much, I'm quite reclusive.

01:21 I'm one of these people, rather than going to the pub or club or bar when I was young,

01:25 I'd stay at home and I would eat a cake or something.

01:27 I'd like to eventually find my soulmate and companion.

01:37 That's what I'm really looking for.

01:39 It is love, though, and affection I want, but not sleeping with a man.

01:42 My dream date scenario would be somebody who had a bit of cash.

01:45 Someone who's quite attractive. I'd like to be a stunner.

01:48 Someone who is very down-to-earth.

01:51 Someone who's probably got a car driving me around and all that.

01:54 Someone who likes me for me or accepts me for me.

01:58 When you're single and you're a virgin and you haven't got much of a social life,

02:08 and you're socially anxious, you start feeling like you're an outcast,

02:12 like you don't really fit in with the human race.

02:14 If someone else was in my situation, I would probably tell them,

02:17 "Don't ever care what people think of you. Just always have confidence,

02:21 have an important self or sense of self.

02:24 Go out a bit more, socialise a bit more.

02:26 Surround yourself with friends and family who love you.

02:29 Do what makes you happy, basically."

02:31 [Music]

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