00:00If you want to get better at work, here is one way to become more magnetic.
00:04Think about the person who commands the room.
00:06They're not just interesting, they're interested.
00:08They're fully present.
00:09They're noticing how people around them react.
00:12And when they're talking to you, they make you feel like you have their full attention.
00:16That's really hard to do when your brain is somewhere else.
00:19Pamela Meyer is the author of How to Read the Room,
00:22and she says that being fully present starts before you even enter.
00:26She recommends taking five minutes to do this exercise that she calls Pam.
00:30That stands for Purpose, Attention, and Modulate.
00:33First, Purpose.
00:34Decide what you want to accomplish.
00:37Second, Attention.
00:38Put away all mental and digital distractions that are going to compete for it.
00:42And third, Modulate.
00:44Take three centering breaths before you enter and decide the energy you want to bring.
00:49The goal is to free up your cognitive load so that you can actually pay attention to what's going on
00:53around you.
00:54When you're not thinking about your to-do list or your next meeting,
00:58you can actually notice someone's body language and listen to what they're saying.
01:01A 2023 study published in the Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin
01:06did five experiments with over 1,600 people.
01:09It found that when people felt genuinely listened to, they felt more connected to that person.
01:14And that's really what being magnetic is all about.
01:17It's not about just getting people to pay attention to you.
01:19It's about getting people to feel like you're paying attention to them
01:23because people will notice and that's what they're drawn to.
