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00:01I
00:02threw up all over my boss's most important guest at the banquet. That man was Cassian Morelli, the Mafia Don
00:08who owned Boston's Underworld.
00:10The whole room went dead silent, but Cassian didn't even flinch. He just looked at my boss and said,
00:15She can't handle her liquor. Watch her. The second the banquet ended, my co-workers were all over me.
00:21That's the Don of the Morelli family. How do you know him?
00:24Cassian stopped in the crowd and looked at me. I looked away and let out a short laugh.
00:29I don't.
00:31After all, when Cassian and I split, he asked me for one thing. Never say his name again. Someone wasn't
00:36buying it.
00:37No way. Mr. Morelli's a total germaphobe. One drop of blood on his suit and he burns the whole thing.
00:43A guy walked into his study without shoe covers once. Cassian broke his leg.
00:48You puked on him and he told our boss to take care of you and you don't know him? I'd
00:52had too much to drink.
00:53I barely caught what Cassian said, so I shook my head again. I don't know him.
00:58He probably let it slide out of respect for the boss.
01:01My boss, Stellan Tiberi, was the younger brother of the Tiberi Don. The Tiberis and the Morellis went
01:07way back. Their heirs grew up side by side. Stellan's brother took the throne and Stellan ran the family's
01:12clean businesses, right? I held my co-worker's stare. Didn't blink. A few seconds later, she talked
01:19herself into it. Yeah, that makes sense. It was for Stellan. That's why Cassian let it go. If Iris
01:26actually knew someone like Cassian, why the hell would she be stuck here with us? And I heard Cassian's got
01:31an arranged marriage at the end of the month. Guy's probably just in a good mood. Once someone said it,
01:35everyone believed it. Everyone except Stellan. He rolled a cigarette between his fingers. One
01:41brow lifted. He wasn't buying a word of it. The party ended. Cassian walked out with Stellan. As
01:49he passed me, he turned his head. One long, deep look. I kept my face empty. Like he was a
01:54stranger.
01:55I didn't even look up. Only after they were gone did the room breathe again. And the gossip circled
02:00right back to Cassian. I'm so jealous of his fiancée, Vivian Castellano. Protected her whole life.
02:06Never suffered a single day. Born into the inner circle, everyone knew she'd marry into the Morellis.
02:13That ring alone is insane. Forget the truckload of gifts he sent her. I heard
02:19Caspian kept some outsider girl around for two years. She crossed Viviani once, and the next day
02:25he had her thrown out of Boston. Her family was dead broke too. And she was easy from what I
02:31heard.
02:31Probably just chasing his money. I dropped my eyes and stayed out of it. Some of it was true. Some
02:37of it
02:37wasn't. The true part, Cassian did leave me because of Vivian. But he never threatened me. He never ran
02:44me out of anywhere. The day we ended it, he didn't even look at me. He got on a plane
02:49to Italy. Two
02:51years. That's how it ended. I couldn't sit there anymore. I grabbed my bag and stood to go. Then I
02:58heard someone ask, Two years? And he didn't miss her at all?
03:03No, Cassian could be that cruel. When I first met him, I had no idea he was the Don everyone
03:09was
03:09terrified of. It seemed to amuse him. So he hit it. Chased me like an ordinary man. Back then,
03:15I was drowning in my mother's medical bills. After my day job, I worked nights at a convenience store,
03:20off the clock at three in the morning. One night walking home, a drunk homeless man cornered me.
03:26I couldn't get away. His filthy hands were almost on me. Then Cassian appeared behind me and kicked
03:32him off. He flicked two fingers. Bodyguards stepped out of the dark. They didn't hold back.
03:37Blood spread across the pavement. Cassian covered my eyes.
03:40Don't look, and don't feel sorry for him. He earned it.
03:45That night, he told me who he really was. I told him we should stop. The Don of the Morelli
03:49family,
03:50and me. We were never from the same world. Cassian didn't say a word. He pinned me to the wall
03:55and
03:56kissed me hard. Once his name was out, he stopped hiding the possessive side of him. He worked harder
04:01than he ever had. Even when I sobbed Daddy and begged him to stop, he didn't slow down until I
04:06couldn't stand. Then Cassian pulled me in tight and buried his face in my shoulder. His voice came out
04:12rough. I don't want you gone. Do you really want to walk away? My heart was slamming against my ribs,
04:20and I realized, helplessly, I'd already fallen for him.
04:25So we didn't break up. After that, I started turning down everything he sent me. A man like
04:30Cassian never gave gifts for nothing, and I couldn't afford to owe him. Then Vivian came back to the
04:35country. Cassian brought me to meet his friends. The private room was full of the people he'd grown
04:40up with in the circle. I greeted each of them. Only Vivian said nothing. She looked me over, head to
04:45toe.
04:46That was the first time I saw her. Beautiful, untouchable. We didn't say a word to each other
04:51all night, not until the end. Then she finally spoke to me. What a coincidence. I heard your mother
04:58got sick and needed money right around the time you met Cassian. I froze. Cassian had covered my
05:05mother's bills once, but I'd paid every cent back. Before I could answer, Vivian's smile shifted.
05:10But that's nothing. Just pocket change. I heard she's gotten worse lately. You should focus on her
05:17treatment. That comes first. Just saying. Don't take it the wrong way. I stood there while she
05:22finished. Cassian dropped his eyes and gave her a light glance. She looked up at him and smiled.
05:28Neither of them said anything. But somehow, it felt like they'd said everything. Afterward, Cassian drove
05:34me home. At my door, he spoke like nothing had happened. Your mother needs money again,
05:37why didn't you tell me? I didn't answer. He pressed something into my palm. A black card.
05:43Anything you need, just say it. My mother was on the couch. She heard every word. My whole body
05:49locked up. I didn't dare turn around and look at her face. All I could get out was,
05:53I don't need it. Please go. I pushed the black card back into his hand. It ended badly.
05:59Cassian stopped handing me black cards, but the gifts kept coming through other people now. One night,
06:05I came home and my front door was wide open. A neighbor was walking out. Your daughter's so
06:09young and she's already got herself a sugar daddy? This stuff looks expensive. She always said she'd
06:15give you a better life. Didn't realize this was how. I froze. Slowly, I looked into the living room.
06:21The table was buried in black boxes, all stamped with the Morelli crest. The apartment was horribly
06:26quiet. My mother sat on the couch. She didn't question me. She didn't say a thing. She just stared at
06:32those boxes. After a long time, she closed her eyes. Iris, sometimes I think it would have been
06:39better if I hadn't survived that crash. My eyes went red instantly. My mother had been in a car
06:44accident, on her way to buy me a birthday cake. It left her disabled for life. That same year,
06:51my father filed for divorce, started a new family, cut us off for good. After that, wherever I went,
06:58my mother came with me. But she never wanted it. She thought she'd become my burden. In high school,
07:04she thought my classmates laughed at me because of her. And now she thought she was the reason people
07:09looked at me like this, whispered about me like this. I looked up at her. The tears wouldn't stop.
07:14After I cried it out, I blocked Cassian everywhere. Sent back every single thing he'd delivered.
07:20He'd been gone for days. That same night, he showed up. Cold rain coming down hard. He looked soaked to
07:27the
07:27bone. He stood there under an umbrella, staring at me, worn out. Why did you block me out of nowhere?
07:33What did I do this time? Was it the style? You didn't like what I sent? His voice was low,
07:38almost
07:39humble. But in this thing between us, the arrogant one was never me. Do you have any idea what people
07:45say about me when you keep sending all that? I looked down. And finally, I couldn't hold it in.
07:52Cassian, I don't get it. Two years. Did you really never know me at all? Why was it so easy
07:57for Vivian
07:58to get in your head? Do you really think I was with you for your money? Thunder cracked overhead.
08:04I waited for him to explain. Instead, he laughed. And when he looked at me again, everything he'd been
08:10holding back was right there on his face. Contempt, impatience, disappointment, and that
08:15untouchable arrogance. You really don't get it? Or are you just not done acting?
08:21Cassian rubbed his brow. Iris, isn't this exactly what you wanted from the start?
08:26You think I didn't know your mother was faking it at first?
08:30You said you needed money for bills. I didn't ask a single question. I had someone pay the hospital
08:36straight. You like jewelry? I could hand it to you without blinking. I gave you a black card.
08:41Was I not clear enough? I don't care if you were with me for my name, Iris. So why couldn't
08:45you just
08:46be honest with me? By the end, he was louder than the rain. I looked at him for a few
08:50quiet seconds.
08:51Then I said it, very softly. I didn't know who you were when we met. My mother was never faking
08:59anything. And I never tried to take a thing from you. Cassian, I already told you the truth.
09:04The disgust in his eyes was impossible to hide now. Fine. A short laugh. If you say so.
09:09The rain came down harder. Cassian turned and walked away. He didn't look back. Three days
09:16later, everything fell apart. My mother had a heart attack. She needed surgery. Now. I called
09:21every relative I hadn't spoken to in years. No one would lend me a cent. In the end, I thought
09:27of
09:28Cassian. I didn't hesitate long. Next to my mother's life, my pride was nothing.
09:35I rushed to his estate. He wouldn't see me. The gate stayed shut. The guards kept their eyes down,
09:40like they couldn't hear me at all. I kept pounding on the gate.
09:45Cassian! Cassian, I need to talk to you. Please come out! Cassian! Can you not be angry right now?
09:51Can you just see me? I really need the money! Cassian, I'm begging you!
10:00I waited until the sky went pale. My voice was gone. The gate never opened. I only found out later.
10:07Cassian had been home the whole night. He just didn't want to see me. After that day, we never
10:12crossed paths again. The only message he ever sent me after it was over was this. From now on,
10:19he never wanted to hear his name leave my mouth again. The cold wind snapped me out of it. Someone
10:26gasped. Boss? You're still here? The gossip cut off in an instant. The whole room went silent. I
10:33looked up. Stellan was standing by the door. He'd been there a while, quietly taking in every word,
10:38and in the shadow beside him, someone else stood too. He leaned against the door frame, a burned-out
10:44cigarette between his fingers. At the sound, he lifted his head. Our eyes met. For one second,
10:51he was exactly the man from my memory. I looked away and walked out like I hadn't seen him.
10:57But this time, as I passed him, Cassian caught my wrist. It's raining. I'll take you home.
11:05Behind me, people sucked in their breath. Even Stellan straightened up, staring at Cassian like he
11:10couldn't believe it. Ever since word spread about the Castellano marriage, Cassian had even swapped
11:15out his female assistant for Vivian's sake. So what was this? I looked down at the hand around my wrist.
11:25A custom engagement ring sat on his middle finger. My brow tightened. I pulled free.
11:31No thank you, Mr. Morelli. I already called a car. Cassian didn't move. His eyes stayed locked on me.
11:39The second he heard Mr. Morelli, they narrowed. The standoff lasted two seconds. I took a step.
11:46Cassian stepped in front of me again, so I turned to Stellan.
11:52Boss? Could you ask your guest to stop blocking my way? Stellan looked at Cassian, helpless.
11:57Don Cassian, do me a favor. Don't give my employee a hard time.
12:02Cassian still didn't budge. His voice stayed level.
12:05Your employee's drunk. If something happens to her on the way home, are you taking the blame?
12:10He clearly wasn't backing off. The air froze. More and more heads peeked out to watch.
12:18Stellan looked at me, then at Cassian. Finally, he sighed.
12:22Then I'll drive her home myself. That work for you?
12:27With every co-worker watching, I got into Stellan's car.
12:30As it pulled out, the wind through the window cleared some of the fog in my head.
12:35Boss, you can just drop me at the subway.
12:38Stellan raised a brow. Didn't answer. He just glanced behind us. I followed his eyes and looked back.
12:43A black, armored SUV was trailing us, steady through the rain. Stellan checked it again,
12:50then looked back at me. The car was so quiet I could hear us both breathing. After a long moment,
12:57he finally spoke.
12:58So Cassian's girlfriend of two years was...
13:01Me.
13:02Stellan lifted his brow again. He didn't say a word. The rest of the drive was silent.
13:08The second I stepped out, the black SUV stopped too. The window rolled down. Cassian's face,
13:16blank as stone. But this time, he didn't get out to stop me. He just looked at me and said
13:22quietly,
13:23I heard that right after you dumped me three years ago, you pulled the same trick. Borrowed
13:28money off Stellan. Iris, don't you think you owe me an explanation?
13:36I almost laughed. What I did back then, who I borrowed from, none of it was Cassian's business
13:41anymore. I ignored him and walked off under my umbrella. He didn't follow, but I felt his eyes
13:48on my back the whole way. The next morning, the office blew up the second I walked in.
13:54Iris, did you really date Mr. Morelli? About last night. We were just repeating rumors. We weren't
14:01trying to come at you. We swear. Please don't take it to heart. Yeah, Iris. Please don't be mad.
14:07They had me boxed in. Finally, I had to say it. It's all in the past. Let's not bring it
14:13up again.
14:15Once I got clear of them, my supervisor called me into his office. The conversation was short.
14:21I got promoted. The moment I walked out, eyes swung toward me from every corner of the floor.
14:27In the meeting, the project everyone had been clawing over landed in my lap too. By the time
14:32I got back to my desk, it was buried in snacks from co-workers. In under a day, the whole
14:37office
14:38was drowning in rumors. In the restroom, I heard the whispering. Iris is something else. Promotion
14:44and that project on the same day? You still don't know? She's Dawn Castian's secret girl.
14:52She's gorgeous. Even if he has to marry into another family, being his mistress isn't a bad gig.
14:58Ms. Castellano's no pusser. If she finds out, oh, this is gonna get good. All day long, people kept
15:05sneaking looks at me. Back at my desk, a co-worker I was close with leaned in. Iris, the whole
15:12office is
15:12talking. You're not actually getting back with Mr. Morello, are you? Guy's about to be married.
15:18I took a sip of my iced a manico and gave a small shake of my head. It's not true.
15:26It was still drizzling when I clocked out. I hated the rain, and I was done seeing Cassian.
15:32He was leaning against his car. The second he spotted me, his eyes came up. For a moment,
15:38it dragged me straight back three years. Back then, Cassian always waited for me like this,
15:43so he could take me home. And when I buried my face in his arms, I'd let myself picture a
15:49future
15:49with him. Looking back now, I saw how naive that was. We were never equal, not from day one.
15:57There was never going to be any ending for us but a bad one. Cassian couldn't accept me back then,
16:02so why was he here now, wrecking my life all over again? He opened the car door and looked at
16:08me.
16:09Let's talk. The only thing I have to say to you is this, stay out of my life. I made
16:14myself clear.
16:16Cassian acted like he hadn't heard a word. He looked at me like he wasn't leaving until I got
16:20in that car. I didn't need to turn around to know how many co-workers were behind me, watching,
16:24whispering. Cassian never cared what anyone thought. He'd never had to.
16:29What do you actually want to say? Just say it, Cassian. Fine. Then he looked at me and said it,
16:34word by word. Iris, get back together with me. For a second, I genuinely thought I was hallucinating,
16:42but Cassian didn't look like he was joking. Not even a little. He went on, slow. Back then,
16:48the second you dumped me, you set your sights on Styler. But from whatever this is between you two
16:53now, I'd say that didn't pan out. Why Stalen? What can he give you? Iris, what I told you back
17:00then
17:00still stands? Whatever you wanted from Stalen, I can give it to you now. That familiar, looking
17:06down on me tone yanked me right back three years. What's that supposed to mean? If I remember right,
17:14you and Vivian are getting married for your families. Does she know you're doing this? So what? So what?
17:20I repeated it in my head. Then I remembered what those two women said in the restroom.
17:25Mistress. So they weren't wrong. Cassius really did want me as his mistress. Three years ago. And now,
17:32in his eyes, I was still that cheap. The insults kept coming. Iris, I can give you more than anyone
17:37alive ever could. Money, connections, whatever you want to do, I'll make it happen. I raised my hand and
17:43slapped him across the face. Hard. Get lost! Cassian, you make me sick. The crack rang out and his face
17:51turned slightly to the side. But his eyes came right back to me. Any other day, anyone who dared
17:56do that to the dawn of the Morelli family wouldn't keep their head on their shoulders. Cassian didn't
18:01hit back. He just said, calm as ever. Iris, still as dishonest as you were back then. He was about
18:08to
18:08say more. Then a voice cut in behind him. Cassian. Stalen had arrived. He stepped in front of me.
18:13That's enough. With Stalen there, Cassian couldn't hold me anymore. I rubbed my still-numb fingers.
18:19Under his stare, I walked away. Didn't look back.
18:23Even after Iris was gone, Cassian kept staring in the direction she'd left.
18:28Stalen let go of him, looking like his head hurt.
18:31Cassian, what the hell is wrong with you? I'm gone on a work trip for one day and you show
18:36up at my
18:37company causing scenes. You're my brother, but I'm not backing you on this. What you said back
18:44there was out of line. I don't care how ugly the breakup was. You don't talk to her like that.
18:51Stalen shoved Cassian into the passenger seat. Cassian's face was ice.
18:58What, you're defending her now? She already climbed into your bed?
19:02Don't let her play you, Stalen. I know her better than you do. She ran the same borrowing money act
19:06on me. That's how she got close. She's not as innocent as you think.
19:13Stalen let out a laugh. So that's what you're hung up on? The money?
19:20I brought it up once last night. Don't tell me you've been chewing on it all night.
19:24Cassian looked out the window and said nothing.
19:28Cassian, I've known you a long time. I don't know what went down between you two back then,
19:32but I'll tell you one thing for sure. Iris is not the person you're painting her as. Honestly,
19:38I never would have guessed she was your ex.
19:41Stalen tapped his fingers against the wheel. If she was really after something,
19:45you think she'd have ended up the way she did after leaving you?
19:48You have any idea how far gone she was when I found her?
19:52To clear that debt, she took on three jobs on top of her day work.
19:56She drank with clients for a $50 tip, kept it up until her stomach was bleeding.
20:00She ran food deliveries in freezing weather. Her hands went so numb she couldn't feel them for
20:04half the day. I only found out later she'd taken a loan-sherft debt to pay for her mother's surgery.
20:10All that grinding just to keep her head above water.
20:14And the money she borrowed off me? I offered it. She didn't ask. It was nothing to me.
20:20But for her, it could have buried her before her life even started.
20:27Cassian, if she was really as shallow and greedy as you say, why not just find another rich man?
20:34Why put herself through all that?
20:36The car went dead quiet. From the second Stellan started talking, Cassian hadn't said a word.
20:41At first, that usual dismissive smirk was still there. Bit by bit, it slid off his face. He sat
20:47frozen, like every word hit too hard to take in. He'd never imagined Iris had lived like that after
20:53the breakup. Memory after memory flashed through his mind, and all at once, Cassian felt it. Maybe he'd
20:59been wrong from the very start. Stellan didn't say anything more. He clapped him on the shoulder.
21:03Cassian, I know. With who you are now, if you really wanted to drag Iris back to your side,
21:09it'd be easy. But you're about to get married. Whatever you got wrong about her before,
21:14stop making her life harder.
21:19After I left Cassian, I crouched by a trash can and dry heaved for a long time.
21:24The nausea wouldn't let go. Then Mom called.
21:27Iris, are you off work? Nothing's wrong. I just wanted to remind you, today's your birthday.
21:36I ordered you a cake from the bakery. Don't forget to grab it on your way home.
21:41Her voice came through, gentle and familiar. The knot in my chest loosened a little. Back
21:46then, I almost lost her for good. Even now, late at night, the fear still washes over me when I
21:52think
21:52about it. But I got the money and time. The surgery went well. And little by little,
21:57Mom got better. I pulled myself together. But when I carried the cake home, the door was open.
22:01There were people standing in my living room. The scene dragged me straight back into the memory I
22:06hated most. Three years ago, after I felt Vivian's hostility at that party, I never went to another
22:12one of their gatherings. So Vivian came to me. Cassian wanted me to bring you the new Chanel.
22:20Then she looked at my mother and smiled. So this is Mrs. Jones. You're the excuse Iris uses, right?
22:28Play sick, so your daughter can play broke and squeeze money out of Cassian? What's the story
22:33going to be next time? Another illness? Getting a little stale, don't you think? Maybe the two of you
22:39should compare notes. I'm sure Mom's got more practice than you. Every word landed in my mother's ears.
22:44And with every word, her face went a shade paler. Before Vivian could finish, I shoved her.
22:50What the hell are you talking about? Vivian hit the floor. Her wrists split open and the tears
22:56sprang up instantly from the pain. That night, her mafia friends showed up. One familiar face after
23:02another crowded my doorway, demanding I apologize. One of them leaned against the hallway wall, fingers
23:08grazing the holster at his hip. My breath caught. Vivian insulted us first. Why should I apologize?
23:15Fine. No apology, then pay. The one against the wall looked me up and down. Then he laughed at his
23:21own line. But can you even afford it? Not like the first time we met. They dropped the manners now.
23:28Besides, you were after Cassian's money anyway, weren't you? So was Vivian wrong?
23:34Why not just be honest? How much do you and your mom want? We'll pay it.
23:40Just stop hanging off Cassian. I was shaking with rage. I opened my mouth. Then Cassian arrived.
23:48The second he showed up, they all cleared out. Their footsteps faded and the hallway went quiet.
23:53I was sure Vivian had called him too. I thought he came for the same reason they did. To make
23:58me
23:58apologize. Or to rub it in. But Cassian never mentioned Vivian. He didn't come at me. He wasn't
24:03angry. He just acted like nothing happened and kept sending the expensive gifts. And not long after,
24:09we were over for good. I shook my head, forcing myself out of it. When I looked up,
24:13my eyes met Vivian's across the living room. She stood dead center, beside her,
24:18the same people who'd tried to force me to apologize back then. I didn't have to guess.
24:23This was about Cassian. The first thing I did was look at mom. She sat on the couch,
24:27calm and quiet. I let out a breath. Vivian looked just as bright and untouchable as she had years ago.
24:33She looked down at me. I didn't say a word. Iris, long time no see. I heard you left Boston
24:39years ago.
24:40I grabbed her by the arm and hauled her toward the door.
24:43What are you doing? I didn't say a word. I grabbed her by the arm and hauled her toward
24:48the door. You wanna talk? Wait downstairs. You don't? Get out. Vivian stumbled as I dragged her
24:54out. The rest scrambled after her. Once the last one was outside, I shut the door. Then I turned to
25:01mom. I was scared Vivian had already said something to her. Mom, I'm going down to settle this with them.
25:07Don't read into anything. More scared mom would start blaming herself again, like she used to.
25:12But compared to three years ago, mom had come so far. She didn't ask a single question. She just smiled.
25:19I won't read into it. I know my daughter better than anyone. Go on, Iris. I'll wait for you to
25:25come
25:25back for dinner. Okay. I nodded hard. Then I turned and headed downstairs. I knew exactly why Vivian and
25:32her people were here. And I wanted this cleared up too. But when I got down, Vivian wasn't the only
25:36one
25:37there. Cassian was there. And so was Stellan. Vivian clearly hadn't seen this coming. Shock all over
25:44her face. Cassian? Why are you here? But Cassian acted like he hadn't heard her. Over the whole crowd,
25:52his eyes came to rest on me. I had a breath trapped in my chest. Since everyone's here,
25:57let's make it clear. There's nothing between Cassian and me. There never will be. And I
26:02won't stand in the way of your family's marriage. I don't care what any of you think. But from now
26:07on,
26:08don't come to my home. Don't touch my life. I want nothing to do with any of you. Clear enough?
26:17For some reason, Vivian's face had looked wrong from the very start. But the second I said that,
26:22she was the first to jump in. Good. Keep your distance, and we won't bother you again. She
26:27let it go shockingly fast. Then she reached for Cassian. Cassian, I know those rumors aren't true.
26:34I won't believe them. We're getting married soon. Don't let this sour your mood. Let's go. Cassian
26:41didn't move. His eyes stayed on me. When he spoke, his voice was low. The money you borrowed off Stalin
26:46back
26:47then. Was it for the surgery? I didn't get why Cassian was asking something he already knew. But
26:53beside him, Vivian's face suddenly shifted. She tugged his sleeve. Cassian, that was years ago. No
26:59point dragging it up now. Cassian ignored her. He looked straight at me. When your mother had that
27:04emergency, why would you rather borrow money than come to me? Iris, did you want to get away from me
27:12that
27:13badly? I thought I'd almost forgotten what happened three years ago. In that moment,
27:19I knew I hadn't. Slowly, I lifted my eyes to him. Cassian, you're saying I didn't come to you?
27:26The night mom collapsed, I stood outside your gate for three straight hours. I begged you hundreds of
27:31times. I called you until I lost count. You never opened the gate. You never came out. Even while she
27:37was in surgery, all I got was a message you sent through someone else. You told me your name should
27:42never
27:42leave my mouth again. Cassian, did I not come to you? Or have you just been lying to yourself?
27:49The sky had gone black. Cassian stood there, his whole body rigid. He hadn't known any of it.
27:53Then one of the men beside Vivian stammered, Iris did come that night. But Cassian was drunk and we,
28:01we turned her away. Cassian slowly lifted his head and looked at him. And after? Why did no one tell
28:09me?
28:10The man didn't answer. He looked at Vivian instead. After a long silence, he forced it out.
28:15Vivian, she said you two had already split. That none of it mattered anymore.
28:22None of it mattered. That night nearly destroyed me. To them, it was just something that didn't matter.
28:27I tugged at the corner of my mouth. I couldn't even name what I felt. Cassian turned to Vivian.
28:32His calm was terrifying. Is that true? Every bit of color drained from her face. She grabbed for his
28:38sleeve, voice shaking. Cassian, I didn't know she came for surgery money. If I'd known, I would have
28:45told you. No matter what, I'd never go that far. Cassian, I know I was wrong to hide it. But
28:53I swear,
28:54I didn't do it on purpose. Cassian pulled his arm away. When she finished, he said,
28:59So it's true. He laughed. Then the second we're back today, we call out the marriage between our
29:03families. What? Vivian looked up, wrecked, unable to string a sentence together. I stood there and
29:11watched her come apart. She choked. She cried. Then she stared him dead in the eye. You're only doing
29:17this because you need someone to pin it on. But what about you? You think you did nothing wrong?
29:25If you trusted Iris even a little back then, would any of this have happened?
29:30Vivian kept pushing until she and Cassian had shredded the last shred of civility between them.
29:36Before she left, she stared at him and spat it out. Cassian, everything I first knew about Iris,
29:42I got from you. Maybe I meddled. But the one who looked down on her the most, who judged her
29:47the
29:47hardest, that was always you. Cassian took the hit. For one second, his whole frame swayed.
29:56Vivian walked off without looking back. Once she was gone, the others glanced around, uneasy.
30:03Then they cleared out too. Before the man who'd spoken first walked off, he looked at Cassian and
30:08left him one last piece of the truth. Cassian, that money Iris borrowed off you for her mother's
30:12bills back then, it really was a loan. She paid it back later, but you weren't around when she did.
30:18Someone close to you pocketed it. Iris never lied to you. I only found out after the fact.
30:23The words hit Cassian like a hammer to the chest. After the man left, the whole complex fell dead silent.
30:29Stellan had taken in every word. He didn't say anything, but it felt like he'd said it all.
30:34After Stellan left, Cassian just stood there, stunned. His head hung low,
30:38like he'd been nailed to the ground. The second I turned to go, he finally spoke, low, hoarse.
30:43Iris, I'm sorry. I didn't know. Iris, do you hate me?
30:50The lights outside the building flickered on and off. I stopped. Then I said it, calm.
30:54Don't say things like that. It makes me sick. And don't come near me again.
31:04The next day at work, everyone looked at me differently. Later, I found out Stellan had put
31:08in a word for me. I told him I didn't want to see Cassian. And after that day, Cassian really
31:14didn't show. But when I got back to my apartment, it was suddenly full of new appliances, furniture,
31:19food. The kitchen was packed. Mom said a man named Stellan had sent it all over. Some kind
31:24of perk for outstanding employees, apparently. Stellan. It wasn't just the kitchen. Even the fridge was
31:30stocked to the brim. I opened it, rows of fresh produce and food. And down one side,
31:36lined up perfectly, a whole row of carrot juice. The only person who knew I liked that flavor,
31:42besides Mom, was one man. I stared at it for two seconds. Then I shut the fridge without a word.
31:47After that day, it was like someone had flipped a luck switch. I went out to eat and somehow won
31:52a
31:52free meal. I went shopping and hit the grand prize in a mall raffle. Even the difficult clients at work
31:58turned polite and easy overnight. Then I went to pay rent, and my landlady smiled and told me the
32:03place had been bought, at a steep price, so the rent wasn't hers to collect anymore. My rent money
32:09got refunded. I stared at my phone for two seconds, then I turned off the screen. The closer Christmas
32:15got, the busier work got. The night it snowed, I stayed late. Heading back to my complex, I felt like
32:22someone was following me. At the corner, I spun around, and there stood Cassian. He hadn't had
32:27time to hide. Black coat, under the streetlight, watching me from a distance.
32:34The first snow landed on my face. I stared at him. Cassian, I told you. I don't want to be
32:39bothered.
32:40Cassian stayed put. Too far for me to read his face. I could only hear his voice.
32:44I know you don't want to see me. I just, I just wanted to look at you. You know that's
32:51not what I
32:51mean. Disgust rose in my chest. Stop using excuses to send things to my place. They're not even good
32:58excuses. Stop pulling strings for me everywhere, and stay out of my life. Cassian froze. After a long
33:05silence, he spoke, his voice strained. Are you really set on cutting me out for good? I never actually
33:10wanted to break up back then, and I never said you couldn't talk about our past. I was just angry.
33:15After that day, I had to leave the country for something. By the time I got back, you'd blocked
33:20me everywhere. I didn't know something had happened to your family. Vivian and I were never together.
33:24It was just a temporary family arrangement. I know I got you wrong. I was wrong. I know I was
33:30wrong.
33:31I shouldn't have thought of you that way. I shouldn't have doubted you. I know you don't want to
33:35forgive me. I just want to make it right, even a little. Iris, don't be this cruel. Don't push me
33:43away. When it snows, even the air bites when you breathe it in. I pulled in a breath of freezing
33:51air,
33:52and for some reason, I suddenly remembered exactly how it felt right after Cassian and I ended.
33:57I did hate him. Hated how cruel he was. Hated that he didn't trust me. Most of all,
34:04I hated myself for truly loving someone like him. Maybe back then, I'd let Cassian matter too much.
34:10At night, those feelings used to swallow me whole. I was trapped inside that pain,
34:15and I really thought I'd never crawl out. But time passed, and the feeling slowly faded. Now all that
34:21was left was nothing. I looked at Cassian, my face blank. Are you done? If you are, go.
34:29Cassian's face went pale. He looked at me, wounded. If none of it had happened back then,
34:34would we still be together? If. Such a useless word. I tugged at the corner of my mouth.
34:41I told you the truth back then. You didn't believe me. If you trusted me even a little,
34:46that prejudice wouldn't have lasted two years. People who aren't equal don't get happy endings.
34:53Not then. Not now. Cassian spoke again, his voice even lower. He said he could change.
35:02I let out a long breath. Do you really have to keep making me sick, Cassian? In an instant,
35:07his eyes went red. The words climbed to his throat, but he couldn't get them out. He looked at me
35:13for a
35:13long moment. In the end, he closed his eyes and nodded. I'm sorry. I won't show up again.
35:22After that night, Cassian never appeared in front of me again. But I knew he still hadn't left.
35:27Somewhere I couldn't see. He was still quietly clearing problems out of my path.
35:31Cassian really does seem different this time. You're really not going to give him another shot?
35:36Snow drifted past the window. I watched it and thought back over everything I'd lived through.
35:42From high school until now. Because I was scared mom would blame herself. I almost never told her
35:47when things got hard. Only looking back did I see it. Every worst moment of my life, I got through
35:52alone.
35:53Alone when my classmates mocked me. Alone when I worked the part-time jobs. Alone when I took mom from
35:59one
35:59appointment to the next. Then I met Cassian. And I thought I'd finally found somewhere safe. But in
36:05the end, when life got hard, the only one I could lean on was still me. Leaning on someone comes
36:10with
36:10a price. And that price can cut so deep it keeps you up night after night. It took everything I
36:16had
36:16to get here. I won't go back. I won't drop myself back into that helpless dark. And I won't betray
36:22the
36:22girl who suffered three years ago. I'll keep moving forward.