00:00I feel like over the years I don't even know how to like express myself. I just feel numb like
00:04I just
00:05I don't have any kids so sometimes I feel like I don't have nothing to live for like just nothing
00:12so yeah that's it. How I feel about my story I still don't know yet. I'm still trying to you
00:20know heal and stuff but you don't know how strong you are until being strong is like the only choice
00:25that you have you know like if you're negative if you're always negative all the negatives will come
00:31like you just have to be strong. I don't know like maybe I need to talk to a therapist because
00:37I try to be a therapist to myself and it was working before I got shot and I was really
00:43feel
00:44like I was like starting to heal and then you know I got shot and I just like feel like
00:50I just live
00:50every day numb. Just do the same thing every day and it's whatever and I fake it like fake being
00:56happy but if I really think about it I'm not. Yeah right now I'd be feeling like like my life
01:03is the
01:03only option but don't ever feel like that because you can always pull yourself back up by yourself
01:08without anyone. If I could say anything to her I think I would just say that I'm like just give
01:16her
01:16a hug and tell her I'm sorry because I feel like nobody ever did.
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