00:00Hey everybody, welcome back to Mental Health Mondays. It's been a while, but I'm excited to
00:04touch on some new topics. As life goes on, life makes you go through new experiences,
00:11and therefore you hopefully learn from those things. So here I am, I'm back to hopefully
00:16share some of those things that maybe can relate to everybody. Today's theme or topic,
00:23we're going to touch on finding common ground when discussing things in recovery.
00:30Specifically, trying to find common ground with someone can be super helpful. And just an example
00:37of this would be specifically in addiction, when you get older, people tend to treat you like the
00:45age that you started with your substance abuse for the rest of your life, and you're just kind of
00:49stuck there. So the way that you can get out of that situation, or at least start to make progress
00:57to maybe not feel less than, or just to not feel like, dang, everyone is thinking about it
01:06constantly. It's almost like being paranoid. Because after a while, at least in my situation,
01:12I'll start to notice things that maybe weren't even intentionally like that, or even weren't like
01:17that at all. I'm just so used to certain people acting a certain way. And I'm like, oh, well,
01:22that person who doesn't even know me is treating me like that. So you must be able to just look
01:25at me
01:26and know exactly what I've been through. Best way to find common ground with someone who's maybe
01:30treating you like, however they think you may be, would be to ideally figure out enough about that
01:38person to then relate your experience with one of their experiences. An example of me finding common
01:45ground with someone would have been like one of my buddies who's a surfer, right? Very relaxed,
01:49super chill hasn't. He's been through what he's been through. And he hasn't been through what he
01:55hasn't been through. That has created a very relaxed and laid back person. So when I tried to explain
02:02because he said something to me, I don't remember the exact words. He was like, Why are you always so
02:06why are you always tripping out? And I was like, Okay, let me try to explain this, like, instead of
02:13me
02:13just being like, what I said to him was, I was breathing really hard just in the car. And we
02:19were like eating breakfast after we had surf. And I said to him, I said, You know, when a lot,
02:25it's called a set in surfing when a several big waves come in, they come in every like 15 to
02:3030
02:31minutes. And I said, You know, that feeling you get when your back is turned, and you turn around,
02:36and you see everyone paddling out in that big wave rolling in, and you know that you're way too late
02:41to
02:41get under it. So it's just gonna land on your head. And he was like, Yeah, it sucks. And I
02:46was like,
02:46Yeah, if you want to break that down, what sucks is in that moment is this like overwhelming feeling
02:53of combination of fear, uncertainty, confusion, because it's catching you off guard. And he was
03:02like, Oh, yeah, that feelings what he said, it sucks. And I said, Well, that's exactly what I feel
03:07like, almost all the time. And to him, then it went, Oh, okay, I understand that that that really
03:15sucks. So that was an easy way to explain to someone who maybe doesn't experience that all the
03:21time. But I know, because he's a human, that I could relate something that he's experienced. And
03:29then hopefully he can understand me better, which in this case, it worked. So well, thank you,
03:34everyone. I appreciate y'all tuning in and let me know what you think in the comments. See y'all
03:39next
03:39week.
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