- 9 minutes ago
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00:00Dad, do we have to do this with you?
00:07Yes.
00:10Hands-on rat removal turns boys into men.
00:13You said the same thing about us cleaning out the garbage disposal.
00:19Oh, boy. Oh, boy.
00:21We have struck rat.
00:24You dirty rat.
00:33Oh, that's what that called me.
00:36Dad, I hate to tell you this, but that's not a rat.
00:40Yeah, a dead rat looks like this.
00:44Mom, promise me you'll never invite one of my teachers to dinner.
00:48Hey, Dad, do you think if you misbehave, Mr. Leonard's gonna give you a detention?
00:52Yes, that's probably just what he's gonna do.
00:54No, it wouldn't hurt you guys when he gets here to show me a little respect.
00:59Why don't we always try and show you as little respect as possible?
01:05Sir.
01:09Mom, great game.
01:11Yeah, we won two to one.
01:13Well, that's great, but guys, when it's snowing, you're supposed to come in through the garage, not track it all
01:17over the house.
01:18When did it start snowing?
01:20A few hours ago. Mom, didn't you notice the blizzard?
01:23No.
01:25I was inside painting all day while the rest of my family was out having fun.
01:29Where's the hot rod?
01:31The hot rod.
01:32Yeah, you know, the thing Dad kisses every night before he goes to bed.
01:42Oh, my God, I left it outside.
01:46Well, you covered it, right?
01:49Wrong.
01:59It's covered now.
02:01How could I have done something so stupid?
02:06They say when two people have been married for a long time, they start acting like each other.
02:16You're not helping, Brad.
02:19Mom, we better clean this up before Dad gets home.
02:22Look, it's just snow.
02:23Snow is water, water is wet.
02:25Anything wet can be dried.
02:27Why don't you just throw it in the dryer and send it on auto?
02:30Hey, hurry up, Mark.
02:32Get out of there.
02:33I gotta go really bad.
02:34Why don't you go upstairs and use your bathroom?
02:36I can't.
02:36Aunt Nancy's in there giving the babies a bath.
02:39Well, then use ours.
02:40Uncle Marty's in there, and he took five magazines with him.
02:46Go get some of those stick matches.
02:49Hey, Brad, Mom and Dad want you to come down for dinner.
02:51Um, tell Mom I'm not hungry.
02:53I'm trying to finish this paper and do my math homework at the same time.
02:59The Franco-Prussian War was fought in the year 1870 minus the square root of 113.
03:09Oh, man, how could I have done that?
03:12I'm never gonna get this paper in.
03:14My teacher only gave me an extension till tomorrow.
03:17I'm dead.
03:19Well, you're gonna be even deader when Mom sees a mess in your room.
03:24Whoa.
03:27This place is disgusting.
03:30I like it.
03:33You know, Brad, you got a big problem.
03:37But maybe we can help.
03:39How?
03:40Well, I can do your homework, and, uh, Mark here will clean your room.
03:45Uh, no, I won't.
03:48Mark, we're brothers.
03:50Brothers do things for each other.
03:52No, we don't.
03:56For money, we do.
03:59How much do I have to pay you?
04:01Well, that depends on how well you want to do.
04:04Ten bucks for an A, five bucks for a B, and two dollars for handling.
04:10What's handling supposed to mean?
04:11Well, after I finish it, I have to hand it to you.
04:15Hey, Randy, you want a taste of what we're having for dinner tonight?
04:17I'm not that hungry.
04:19Marie made it.
04:20I'm starving.
04:23You know, as soon as these finals are over, I'm going to be back there behind that stove.
04:27Don't say that.
04:28Not even joking.
04:32What are you doing home?
04:33I thought you had band.
04:35Yeah, well, I forgot my sax.
04:37Um, I gotta go right now.
04:38Wait, wait, wait.
04:38Did the teacher grade that paper on the Franco-Oppression war?
04:42Yeah.
04:43Let me see it.
04:47It's the red folder.
04:53Brad, you got an A.
04:55All right.
05:00What are you so happy about?
05:03Can a guy be happy for his brother?
05:08Put him down till you tried them on.
05:11Do you think we have enough?
05:13Well, we have enough pants, but now we have to get shirts to go with them.
05:17Shirts?
05:17You never said anything about shirts.
05:19Well, honey, if you don't get shirts to go with the pants, then you don't have an outfit.
05:25Mom, guys do not wear outfits.
05:27I mean, why don't you just put me in a dress?
05:31You know, I think you should try this bigger size.
05:34It might give you more room in the seat.
05:36Randy?
05:37Oh, sorry.
05:40Oh, Randy?
05:42Mom!
05:44Oh, please, like I haven't seen it before.
05:47Come on out here.
05:48I want to look at these.
05:51Well, length looks okay.
05:54How's the crotch?
05:56Could you say crotch a little louder?
05:57I don't think everybody heard you.
06:00Would you hold this up around so I can see the waist?
06:02Let me see how it fits.
06:05Do you have to jiggle?
06:06I mean, look.
06:10What if someone I know sees me?
06:12Oh, please, nobody is looking at you.
06:14Hi, Randy.
06:19Beth, hi.
06:21Hi, Beth.
06:23So, Beth, what are you doing here?
06:26Shopping for clothes.
06:27Shopping for clothes.
06:29Good thing to do in a clothing store.
06:31So, how'd you do on that biology test today?
06:34I missed an easy one on vertebrae.
06:36You know, that is such a funny word, vertebrae.
06:39But then again, so is a protoplasm.
06:42Oh, boy.
06:45So, do you shop in the store a lot?
06:47Well, yeah.
06:50But not with my mom.
06:52I mean, we just happened to be in here.
06:54I was looking for pants.
06:55Yeah, I was over at the Cheese Chalet buying a Goudalogue.
06:59I never shop for Randy anymore.
07:01He's obviously old enough to buy his own stuff.
07:03What do you think about this for me?
07:05Ma'am, is this the kind of underwear you wanted for your little boy?
07:11A ladder, exposed wires, and death.
07:16No good can come from this.
07:20I'm just hooking up my surround sound speakers for my Super Bowl party.
07:24We're gonna go to Jeremy's and watch it on this new 70-inch big screen.
07:27Big deal.
07:29You're missing some great food.
07:31Larry's bringing a three-cheese pizza.
07:33Harry's bringing those big sausages.
07:34And Pete's bringing nachos, that extra cream cheese.
07:37Oh, oh.
07:37Oh, oh, oh.
07:41Who's bringing the cardiologist?
07:45Hey, Mom.
07:46Hey.
07:48Uh-oh.
07:51Food, a pot, and Mom.
07:55No good can come from this.
07:58Well, in that case, you can get your own breakfast.
08:00All right, cookies and ice cream.
08:03In your dreams.
08:05Mom, Mom.
08:06Mom, better come see Dad.
08:08He doesn't look so good.
08:10Then why would I want to see him?
08:14All right, give me another problem.
08:16Okay.
08:17Bill's car goes 40 miles per hour.
08:19Mary's car goes 60 miles per hour.
08:22How long will it take for each of them to go 120 miles?
08:25All right, what size motors do they have?
08:29What?
08:30Well, is it automatic or manual transmission?
08:32That's got to make a difference.
08:33Dad?
08:33Dad, the answer is Bill, three hours, Mary, two.
08:37Thanks.
08:40I shouldn't be helping you with your math homework anyway.
08:43You're not.
08:46All right, what's your English assignment?
08:48Well, I have to do a report on the most interesting person I know.
08:53I was born in Middle Michigan.
08:57It was an autumn birth.
08:58I had breech baby.
08:59That was a really difficult birth frame.
09:00Dad, I'm not sure you're the most interesting person I know.
09:04I'm not sure he's the most interesting person in this room.
09:09Maybe I'll do Wilson.
09:11Wilson?
09:13Wilson?
09:14What interesting thing is he going to tell you?
09:16Well, how about his dinner with Einstein?
09:19Wow, he had dinner with Einstein?
09:21Really overrated guy.
09:25If he knew so much about gravity, how come his hair stood up like that?
09:30You should write the story about me.
09:32I think I'll stick with Wilson.
09:36Hi, guys.
09:37Hi, honey.
09:37Hey.
09:38Hey, Brad, who's the most interesting man that you know?
09:42Wilson.
09:43Wilson.
09:43Wilson.
09:46What are you doing, Wilson?
09:48Well, Randy, I'm making an alpenhorn.
09:50You see, in Switzerland, they use these to herd sheep.
09:53Are you getting out of sheep?
09:54Actually, I'm making it to play in the local alpenhorn quintet,
09:57and you boys are welcome to come out this Saturday
09:59and be my guest at the annual Horn and Yodel Fest.
10:02Sounds like a rocking good time, Wilson,
10:04but I'm already going to that clarinet and noodle fest.
10:09Why don't you ask Michelle to dance?
10:11I just think you're supposed to wait an hour before you go dancing.
10:16That's swimming.
10:17You're right.
10:18It's two hours before dancing.
10:20Get over.
10:33Hey, Michelle.
10:34Hi.
10:35So, you, uh, having a good time?
10:38Not really.
10:42Well, neither am I.
10:43I'd leave, but, uh, this is my house.
10:48I like your shoes.
10:51I like your ears.
10:56What?
10:57I mean, I just never noticed them at school before.
11:01I always bring them with me.
11:03Yeah, it's just usually, you know, you wear your hair down,
11:06and you can't see them, but, uh,
11:08now you can, and they really match your nose.
11:13Thanks.
11:15Um, I'm really glad your father let you stay.
11:18I'm really glad your father put some pants on.
11:35How come no one's dancing?
11:36This floor isn't just for looking at.
11:38Come on.
11:40Hey, Sherman, how you doing, buddy?
11:42What are you gonna dance for?
11:43I made this for Andy for his birthday.
11:45Did your dad ever make you want a dance floor like this?
11:47No.
11:48I kept dropping hints, but all I got was a crummy CD player.
11:51Yeah.
11:56Hey, Dad, I thought you told me you were gonna stay upstairs.
11:59Yeah, no, I thought me I'd come down here
12:00and help everybody get the party going,
12:02a little dance to everybody.
12:02Come on.
12:03Baby circles.
12:08I'm a king.
12:09No one gave me nothing.
12:10Shut up.
12:10Woo!
12:11Woo!
12:11Woo!
12:12Woo!
12:12Woo!
12:13Woo!
12:13Woo!
12:14Woo!
12:14Woo!