00:00My name is Josh Partridge and I am a sports journalist at The Examiner.
00:04I'm here with Perth footballer Josiah Burling and the two of us have a pretty unique thing in common.
00:11Our mothers both passed away on the same day, August 14, 2021, and coming up is the five-year anniversary
00:20to that day.
00:22So we're going to chat here today about, I suppose, how grief has affected our lives and how it's kind
00:28of changed it.
00:29So I suppose, straight away, mate, how has grief changed who you are over these last five years?
00:35Well, as a young 18-year-old male, when you get put in the hot seat like that, you've got
00:40to grow up pretty quick.
00:42I was all very fresh to that sort of raw emotion.
00:49And when something's so permanent, something that seems so permanent gets swept away from under your feet like that,
00:57you realise pretty quickly that nothing's ever granted in life.
01:01And, you know, take those as they come, cherish the people that are around you.
01:05And, yeah, so, you know, my five years, you know, I've come a long way, I feel, as a person.
01:14I've been able to educate myself on, you know, how to, you know, emotionally conduct myself in a manner that,
01:22you know,
01:23allows me to, you know, get a sense of fresh air every now and then.
01:31Yeah.
01:31Yeah, and I think I'm pretty similar too, mate, in that you get pretty sentimental once you lose something
01:37and someone that's happened, that's had so much in your life.
01:40Like, I think I'd like to say that I really pride myself on letting the people that I love around
01:49them know that I love them.
01:51For sure.
01:51And I think, yeah, like pretty, you don't really, yeah, I was that I didn't really notice the severity of
01:59it straight away.
02:00You don't really, until it kicks in about a month, two, three months down the track, when people, there's no
02:06one else's fault,
02:07but when people stop reaching out, hey, mate, how are you going?
02:10It's when life has to go on.
02:12And that's the hardest part of it.
02:14And that's, and kind of leads into my next question, but that's how we deal with it.
02:19Like, how have you dealt with it over your time?
02:25Well, you know, I suppose it goes back to, you know, it's a fresh journey from the start.
02:31So I started looking, I was going in a circle for a long time, emotionally, physically, mentally.
02:38I just kept finding, finding myself, retracing my steps.
02:42I found that, you know, I started to realise that it's okay to feel, I know, it's, it's, it's okay
02:50not to be okay.
02:51And, you know, once you, once you start realising things, that's when you can start, you know,
02:57educating yourself on how to deal with things.
03:04It's, yeah.
03:05It's bloody hard, isn't it?
03:06Yeah.
03:06And, like, you've just got to find ways to get through it.
03:09And, like, I, we've been talking about this for a while, and I actually probably can't tell you how I
03:14get through things.
03:15I think you've just got to, you've got to, toughen up's the wrong word, but you've just got to get
03:19through it.
03:20You've got to go grab the bull by the horns, in a sense.
03:22One thing that helped me massively, and it still does to this day, and I still implement it on a
03:26lot of my life challenges,
03:27is you've got to have purpose.
03:29Because if you don't have purpose or, you know, a reason, then you just, you just get lost and you
03:35get, you get off track.
03:36And that's how I found myself going back in circles.
03:39So the day that I found, the day that I realised that, you know, how massive purpose and to have
03:45a goal in life is, it is, so no matter what walk of life I'll be at from now on,
03:50I always know my purpose is to repay my mother with pride, you know, and joy for all the love,
03:58motor skills, effort she put into growing me up.
04:01So as long as I'm, as long as I'm doing things to make her proud, you know, that's, that gives
04:05me a sense of fulfilment that I'm on the right path in life.
04:08Well said, mate.
04:09I think we kind of, and we, obviously, we come from a sporting background, I suppose.
04:14Talk me, and we're lucky enough to do that.
04:16Talk me through what your sporting clubs have helped over your time as well.
04:20And sporting, I said, I've said it in the, previously, but sporting clubs saved my life, you know, being, uh,
04:29being able to just go, go somewhere a couple hours a week and forget, you know, sense and just give
04:37yourself, you know, just let your mind relax and be around people that care about you and want the best
04:44for you.
04:44But, like, on the other side as well, maybe a bit further down the track, it's allowed me to, to
04:51reach out to other peers and younger people and some older that are going through things that I've been through
04:57that, uh, that I can educate and help and, uh, you know, walk them through their challenges.
05:05Just, you know, it gives me a sense of pride to make someone feel that they're not alone.
05:09It's okay to be vulnerable.
05:10It's okay to open up.
05:11Like, you've got to talk about things in life, otherwise, you're your own worst enemy.
05:16Yeah, and I think straight after everything happened, I was, I, well, it was cricket pre-season time, so I'm
05:22straight back into things.
05:23I, I didn't want to be mollycoddled.
05:25I didn't want people to come up and be like, are you okay, mate?
05:28Like, you, I wanted to live, feel a sense of normality.
05:31And I think sporting clubs allow you to do that because you're so focused on something else.
05:37Yeah.
05:38For sure.
05:38I think later that year, we made a cricket grand final and I, I wanted it too badly.
05:43I built up the situation so big.
05:45I was like, I need to win this for mum.
05:47Yeah.
05:47Whereas when the next year we did it, didn't think about it until we won.
05:51And that moment with dad, it's one of the best moments of my life.
05:54I can still remember it.
05:56Running up to him after we win the flag.
05:57Like, and that's what sporting clubs allow you to do.
06:00It goes back to your thing, mate.
06:02It's purpose.
06:02Absolutely.
06:03Sporting clubs give you one of the world's biggest purposes as simple as whatever sport is.
06:07So, mate, I'm, I'm so grateful that you've, you've given up your time to have this conversation.
06:13It's one that, one that hopefully, as we said, hopefully it helps just one person.
06:17But, mate, thank you very much.
06:19Pleasure.
06:19Pleasure, Robert.
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