- 2 days ago
Category
🎈
FunTranscript
00:03Oh, get home again, huh?
00:07What's this?
00:08Where is it?
00:09Sorry, sorry.
00:10I'm trying to find the toilet.
00:11Yeah.
00:12Okay.
00:22Bang the toilet, please, Brie.
00:24No, I can't.
00:25Sorry.
00:32Hey, it's all right, hey.
00:34No, no.
00:34Oh, no.
00:40What's going on?
00:42Damn, it's 4.30.
00:44It's been a lot off.
00:45I'm going to go to the toilet.
00:48Shut the door.
01:05Did you wash your hands?
01:08Kim, come back and bang the toilet, please.
01:28Who's bright idea was it to turn the bathroom into a bedroom for Ethnie?
01:32Well, what's it took now?
01:33Oh, she was keeping us awake all night.
01:35Yeah, well, look who's waking us up all night now.
01:38Come on, Brie, hurry up.
01:43Sorry, yes?
01:43Okay, Brett.
01:44Oh, Brett, can you put the fan on, please?
01:48You know, Kim, Ebony's growing up.
01:50There's just no room for you all here anymore.
01:52I mean, you're almost 27.
01:54You should be putting down a deposit.
01:56I paid off my flat and simple by that, eh?
01:58Oh, that is so old school.
02:00I mean, people stay home till they're 30-plus these days.
02:03Won't you have me if you can't look after me?
02:06Well, if you're not going to move out, Kim, maybe I will.
02:08That'd be good, actually.
02:09Oh, shut up, Kim.
02:22You don't own this house, you know, Kel?
02:24No, Kim, I do.
02:25And while Kel is here at my behest, I expect you to treat him as such, please.
02:29Oh, okay.
02:31Bye, dog.
02:34What's the way you're going?
02:36Oh, Kel's left his anti-cancer council, Sonny.
02:39Kel, you want some of this cheese, Ed?
02:42Look, look.
02:43Oh, it's nice.
02:46Kel, Kel, you're done.
02:48Sorry, I forgot things.
02:49Thanks.
02:50You all right, Kel?
02:52Kel, I'm not just here at your behest.
02:53I am your husband.
02:55Oh, I know, Dad.
02:56I didn't mean that.
02:57You know, it's just a silly slip of my tongue.
02:58Yeah, but it was a Freudian slip of your tongue, wasn't it?
03:01Well, what's it supposed to mean?
03:03Well, you're right.
03:04This is your house.
03:06Wouldn't it be nice if we had our steaks in something together?
03:09Well, yeah, it would be.
03:10And you know, if we had the dough, I'd love to buy Mandy's house.
03:13Sell here and kill two birds.
03:15What, Mandy and Kim?
03:17Well, I guess they've already killed Mandy.
03:19She's flying off to Poohong to grow agapans on a commercial scale.
03:22It's a beautiful house.
03:23I'd love to have a gander inside.
03:25Well, we never got the invite, did we?
03:27Well, it's open tomorrow.
03:29Let's go and have a squeeze, just for fun.
03:31All right, OK.
03:32All right, Dad.
03:32Bye.
03:33Have a nice day.
03:36Kim, you're going to have to cull some of Effany's toys.
03:39They're taking odour.
03:42Stop seeing me, Furby, please.
03:45I've got broccoli in here.
03:47Mum, I wouldn't know.
03:48I've never been in one unlike you.
03:50Stop it, Kim.
03:51Stop it, Furby.
03:52Hello, Sharon.
03:53Hi, Mrs. B.
03:54Hi, Kimmy.
03:55What are all the bags?
03:56Cool.
03:57I've been kicked out of my flat.
03:59Why?
03:59Well, my Dad came back from Tawant today and he wants his flat back.
04:03Yeah, and Daddy and my step-mum have decided to stucco it and double the rent.
04:06Oh, well, Sharon, love, you can't stay here.
04:08We're chockers at the moment.
04:09Can you go to a motel or something?
04:11I haven't got any money.
04:12I was being retrenched.
04:13We're closing down the hospital.
04:15Oh, no, not the repass.
04:17Yeah, yeah, they're going to turn into flats.
04:20They've decided to stucco it and double the rent.
04:22It's winter.
04:23It's not that bad.
04:24Not that bad.
04:53Not that bad, Kim.
04:55Deal.
04:56Deal.
04:57She's wearing my socks.
04:59Do I look as fat as her?
05:01Yes.
05:02What?
05:03Deal.
05:04Deal.
05:04Take the bank off the deal.
05:06Um, deal.
05:07Oh, you're not good to say.
05:10She just won 13 grand, that fat one.
05:12She's going.
05:13Really?
05:15Boy, maybe I should.
05:18I mean, imagine if I won the 200,000 grand.
05:20That would solve all my problems.
05:21Not all your problems.
05:23And frankly, Sharon, I don't think they'd let you on TV.
05:25They'd go for a Pacific tide.
05:27You know, young and pretty.
05:29Oh, yeah, I suppose you're right, Kim.
05:32Well, maybe I should take someone with me.
05:35Who do I know is young and pretty?
05:41Hello?
05:44Yeah, I suppose you could come with me, Kim.
05:46All right, stop you begging.
05:47I'll come.
05:52Who's that?
05:53Oh, it's just me, Mrs. D.
05:54It won't be a moan.
05:56It's took downstairs, Sharon.
05:57Oh, no, that one's blocked, Mrs. D.
06:02Bluff.
06:03This house is just too damn small.
06:16Oh, wow.
06:19Look at that, Kel.
06:21Mandy's pulled out all the period Alcatraz.
06:23It's a crime.
06:25Great house, though.
06:26Great bones.
06:28What year is it, Kat?
06:30Oh, it's definitely turn of the century.
06:32Which century, I can't say, but probably both.
06:37Gee, I'd like to have a good go at Mandy's drawers.
06:40What, Kel?
06:41Mandy's walking.
06:43Look at this.
06:44She's got her smalls in with her teeth.
06:45Oh, yeah.
06:49Look at the fretful work, Kel.
06:50I can just see my maiden hairs hanging all along the veranda there.
06:56I love it.
06:57I know, but the stamp duty alone, it cripples.
07:02Hey.
07:03Oh.
07:05King, stop that.
07:17Come on, Sharon.
07:21Oh, you look nice.
07:23Is that a new skirt?
07:25It's not a skirt.
07:27It's shallots.
07:29Oh, no.
07:30It looks lovely.
07:31Just excuse me.
07:33Ow!
07:36Sharon!
07:55Excuse me, we're here for the vehicle.
07:57Excuse me.
07:58Excuse me.
08:00Excuse me.
08:03Oh, wow.
08:04Kenny, look at the stable of stars.
08:07With my amazing looks and talent, won't be long before somebody puts me in a stable.
08:11Yeah.
08:19Well, Kel, did you see someone just bought Mandy's house?
08:22I know.
08:22I actually know the guy.
08:24Really?
08:24Who?
08:25You should see his wife.
08:26She's a real fox.
08:27I quite fancy her.
08:28Well, what's the yellow for, Brett?
08:31You can't tell her, Kel.
08:32Have a flute, Foxy.
08:33We're moving up in the world.
08:34Well, next door, actually.
08:36Kel, what are you saying?
08:39I bought Mandy's house.
08:40Congratulations, Kat.
08:41Oh, what is it?
08:42You bought me?
08:43I used my nest egg.
08:44I got a great price.
08:45I told them we were desperate for it.
08:46Oh, you shouldn't tell them that.
08:48Oh, no, stay with them, Brett.
08:49I wrong-footed them.
08:50I put in an offer well over the reserve.
08:52Oh, Kel J Hooker, you're the best.
08:55We're going to have to sell here, Kat.
08:56Oh, go on over here and see if I'll be over there.
08:59Yeah, can you organise a real estate agent today, you know, get the ball rolling?
09:01Oh, no way, Jose.
09:03I can sell this house myself.
09:04I did the paid course in real estate last year.
09:06Guess what?
09:07We're going to be on deal.
09:09Oh, are you kidding?
09:10Yeah, I blitzed the interview.
09:12So you're not stupid, Kim.
09:14Who said I was?
09:15I know.
09:16Oh, we'll crack open another bottle of yellow red.
09:18Yeah.
09:19And can I have some footy, Frank?
09:20Yeah, go for it, go for it.
09:21Well, we've got some exciting news, too.
09:23Guess what?
09:25We've just bought Mandy's house.
09:27Oh, my God!
09:27You mean I'm finally going to get this house to ourselves?
09:30Oh, no, no, no, Kim.
09:31We'll have to sell here.
09:32Oh, we'll have to clean your room out from top to bottom.
09:34Oh, I can't just leave it next door.
09:35What's my new room like?
09:36Have I got none sweet?
09:37No, Kim, you're not coming to Mandy's.
09:39This is for killing me.
09:40It's our official love nest, isn't it, dog?
09:42This is your idea, Kim.
09:45You thought you could waltz in here with your zip-up shoes
09:48and your yoghurt and measly breath and reel the roof?
09:51But there was one big fat problem in your way, wasn't there?
09:54Me?
09:56I'm smarter than you.
09:58I've got a higher I.K. than you.
10:00And you can't handle it.
10:03Oh, poo, Kim, open all your breath from here.
10:06You ruined everything, Kel.
10:07We were happy before you came along.
10:09Oh, well, I wasn't.
10:10I wasn't.
10:10Who was I?
10:11Well, get to stop the period.
10:13I'm not moving.
10:14Oh, so what, Kim?
10:15You're going to stay here with the new owners, are you?
10:17Hopefully, Sel, you have to move.
10:19If you sell, oh, we'll sell and we'll.
10:24Once I've weaved my magic wand.
10:26Oh, gee, I've got a water feature over there.
10:28That's amazing.
10:28I don't believe it.
10:29The luck of the Irish.
10:30What, Kel?
10:31Hard rubbish day tomorrow.
10:49I don't believe it.
10:52Wow.
10:57Wow, cool.
11:10To be continued...
11:34I can kill you.
12:26Good afternoon.
12:27Good afternoon.
12:29There you go.
12:31Yes, on the ground.
12:33Oh, one for you, sir.
12:42G'day, Foxy. Can you come with the house?
12:44Cal.
12:45Can I get your contact details, please, sir?
12:47Oh, yes, certainly. It's Cal night.
12:50Ma! Ma!
12:51Kim! Look, I'm a real estate agent.
12:54I guess what? Deal just called.
12:56We're on on Saturday.
12:58Saturday's the auction team.
12:59Shut up. I am not.
13:02Anyway, I'm not gonna help you sell my inheritance.
13:04Don't worry. I'll go if someone can.
13:06Oh, all right, Chris.
13:30Oh, well, that's great to hear, Sharon.
13:32So, no doubt all the girls now at the Sapphires are gonna be rooting for you today.
13:35All the best.
13:36Now, you've also got someone else to root for you.
13:38Your friend Kimmy on Briefcase 4.
13:39Hi, Kim.
13:40Boy.
13:41How you doing?
13:43Yeah, good.
13:44Oh, that's good.
13:44Now, listen, Kimmy, if it was you doing the deals today,
13:46and, you know, you didn't have any bills to pay,
13:48no rent due or any of that,
13:50what would you spend your winnings on?
13:52Well, I have a Hummer fetish, Andrew.
13:55I love petrol guzzlers.
13:56I just love status symbols, basically.
13:58Fantastic.
13:59Yeah.
14:00You and Schwarzenegger, Hummer fans.
14:01How about you, Sharon?
14:02What would you spend your money on?
14:04Um, well, I was gonna pay my rent.
14:06Um, I don't really know.
14:09I don't really have a fetish.
14:10Okay, good.
14:11All right, well, we've got six cases to open.
14:13The Dealadrome is your oyster, Sharon.
14:15Let's deal.
14:16I think I want to go.
14:18I think I want to go.
14:20I just want to wait for anybody.
14:25Well, hi, everybody,
14:26and welcome to the auction of number four Lagoon Court, Fountain Lakes.
14:32I hope you've all bought your purses today, peoples,
14:35because this beautiful property is going to be sold.
14:38Now, firstly, I would like to congratulate the owners
14:41on their pre-auction makeover.
14:43You should have seen it before.
14:46I won't keep you long,
14:48but I would like to point out some of the myriad of special features
14:50of this most loved and cherished home.
14:53It has six bedrooms, peoples.
14:56Yes, not four, not five, but six bedrooms,
15:00including one in the garage and one in the toot.
15:03The best latte in town is less than 30 minutes' power walk down the street
15:08at the award-winning croutons on the bay.
15:11I mean, talk about convenience.
15:13And city living, I hear you say.
15:15Well, the S19 freeway is on your doorstep.
15:19Literally on your doorstep.
15:21If you don't believe me, just close your eyes and listen.
15:23It's that close, I tell you.
15:25Anyway, who'll start me off with a bid for this home,
15:29which is not so much a home,
15:31but a complete lifestyle package
15:33that is number four Lagoon Court Fountain Lakes.
15:36Who'd like to start me off?
15:43Anybody?
15:44Anything?
15:46Sharon, it's crunch time.
15:48$10,000 on the table right now.
15:52That's yours if you want it.
15:54Or take a 50-50 shot on briefcase 24.
15:58You could leave here with $20,000,
16:00or you could lose the lot.
16:02Sharon's Trezlecki.
16:04Deal or no deal?
16:06What?
16:07What do you think? Deal or no deal?
16:10Him?
16:11Him?
16:12Him?
16:12Sharon, it's your choice.
16:16No deal!
16:17No deal!
16:19Sharon!
16:20I can't believe it!
16:21That's a gutsy manoeuvre!
16:22Turning down a bank offer of $10,000!
16:26$10,000?!
16:28You are unbelievable!
16:29I hope you're so incredible!
16:31I hope you're so incredible!
16:33Girls, girls, girls!
16:34Please.
16:35It's almost news time.
16:37Time to do this thing.
16:38Sharon?
16:40Time to open your case.
16:41Either there's 20 grand in there,
16:43or 50 cents,
16:45Sharon's Trezlecki,
16:47pop those locks.
16:52Well, look, I'll start us off, everyone.
16:54I'll start off at $400,000!
16:56At $400,000!
16:58Let's say $400,000!
16:59I'll take excrements of 50, people!
17:01Excrements of 50!
17:02Thank you, sir!
17:04We have a bid!
17:04We have a bid there!
17:05At $400,000!
17:06We have $400,000!
17:09And...
17:10And going once at $400,000!
17:13The property's going once at $400,000!
17:15Going twice!
17:16Going twice!
17:18And...
17:18Sold!
17:19To the man in the cap!
17:20Thank you!
17:20At $400,000!
17:22Sir, would you like to step inside?
17:24Thank you for coming, everyone!
17:26The property is sold!
17:36I'm so sorry, Cap!
17:38I thought you recognised me!
17:39I thought you knew I was bidding for you!
17:40Well, look!
17:41What are you saying?
17:42That I've sold the house to myself?
17:44That means I've got to pay stamp duty on two properties!
17:47Oh, no!
17:47I've seen the vendor bid!
17:48Well, aren't I the vendor?
17:50Or am I the dummy?
17:51Oh!
17:52So confusing!
17:53What are we going to do, Kel?
17:55Oh, I don't know!
17:56We have to settle on Maddie's house this week!
17:57Oh, gee!
17:58This is a bloody disaster!
17:59My nesting!
18:00Oh!
18:02Oh!
18:02Oh!
18:03Oh!
18:03Oh!
18:03Oh!
18:03Oh!
18:03Oh!
18:03Oh!
18:04Oh!
18:06Oh!
18:21It's simply Section 23A Clause 24 of the Real Estate Act of Victoria states that if a
18:27dummy bidder is unbeknownst to the auctioneer at time of bidding, all bid standards thus
18:32be stated!
18:33God, thank you!
18:34Oh!
18:34But, Brett hasn't got two bars of these to rub together!
18:38Guess what?
18:39I just won $20,000 on Tuneil!
18:41Oh, my God!
18:42Are you kidding?
18:43It's not just in the nick of time!
18:45$20,000!
18:46Because Brett just bought the house!
18:48What?
18:48You didn't tell me you were bidding!
18:49Oh my God, you mean this house is mine?
18:52I didn't buy the house, you haven't got any money.
18:54Yes, we have. I just want 20 grand.
18:56No, Kim.
18:57$20,000? I mean, that's a deposit, Kel.
18:59You can get a loan.
19:00I'll have a word to the bank before you break it to the top.
19:02I'll be just right.
19:03Sorry, Kel, please stop.
19:04Oh, everything's honky-dory now, Kel. Everything's gonna be alright.
19:09Let's go and peruse my beautiful new home.
19:11Your new home, Kat?
19:12Oh, sorry, Kel. Our new home.
19:14Oh, come on.
19:16Oh, I...
19:17Tim, I won the money. I won the $20,000. You saved no deal.
19:22No, I didn't.
19:23Tim, I don't want to buy this house. I think your mum's wrong.
19:25Shut up, Brett. Listen, Sharon, we only got on deal because of my look.
19:29No way, Tim. We got through because I had the fastest fingers.
19:33I had the fastest fingers.
19:34We can get your fat fast fingers out of my footy francs and, frankly, out of my house.
19:43I want to knock that wall out straight away. I think that would look great.
19:47Can we put the credenza on the other side? Can you do that now?
19:50Oh, thank you.
19:52Well, I'm gonna start packing up our room tonight. That'll be good.
19:55And then...
19:56Oh!
19:57There's Mandy's a man.
20:00What's she doing back?
20:08So Mandy's like a pants lit butt.
20:11Pull me another wine, please, Kim.
20:13I'll make you do enough, Mum.
20:14I'll tell you when I've had enough, thank you, Kim.
20:16Okay.
20:18I can't believe Mandy.
20:20There's something cow on the front lawn right in front of me.
20:23I think it's disgusting behaviour.
20:25How could she renege on the sale and buy back her own house?
20:28It doesn't make sense.
20:29Oh, Kim, trust me.
20:30If you read the Real Estate of Victoria Act, it makes sense.
20:33The loopholes.
20:34I wouldn't believe.
20:35Well, I can't believe you gave Sharon back the 20 grand.
20:39Oh, Kim.
20:40After watching you both on deal, Sharon won that money fair and square.
20:43You were hopeless.
20:44Spent the whole time watching yourself on the monitor.
20:46Oh, I liked what I saw.
20:48Anyway, what's Sharon going to do with the money?
20:51That I don't care.
20:53Oh, speak of the devil.
20:54It's sad.
20:55What are all the bags for?
20:56Oh, I've been shopping, Kim.
20:58Yep.
20:59I am developing a shoe fetish with all my winnings.
21:02Sharon, that's very Sarah Jessica from Sex and the City, isn't it?
21:05Oh, Mrs. D, maybe I'll find a Mr. Big.
21:08Yeah, and then you'll be Mrs. Big.
21:10That'll be right.
21:11Kim.
21:11Kim, I didn't forget you.
21:13I have brought you a present.
21:16Oh, hi.
21:19Manolo Blahnik.
21:20Oh, they're different.
21:23Yeah, it's Manolo's new range.
21:26Manolo Blahnik for cump.
21:28They're nice, Kim.
21:29It's different than usual.
21:30Yeah, it's different than usual.
21:31I thought you liked it, actually.
21:33Oh, my God.
21:33Oh, look at that.
21:34Look at the work.
21:35They're stunning.
21:36Oh, wow.
21:37Manolo, you've done it again.
21:39I love them, Karen.
21:41Oh, I thought you were having a paloma there, Kim.
21:44It's like a marketing.
21:45Shut up.
21:46I'll get the water off.
21:47Kim, can you hurry up with that triple cream brie, please?
21:49I shouldn't, but I will.
21:51All right, all right.
21:52Here it is.
21:53Oh, you look nice.
21:55You've got your Manolo.
21:56Yep.
21:56I've got my Manolo Blahnik for cump.
21:59My Stella McCartney for target.
22:00And my Lana Hill for the $2 shop.
22:03Hmm.
22:03And look at, look at Koo-Jay.
22:05She's wearing Stella McCartney for dogs.
22:07Oh, gorgeous.
22:09Yeah.
22:09What have you come as, by the way?
22:11Did you get that from the roof?
22:12No, 80s?
22:13No, it's new.
22:14It's Harry Who and George Grace.
22:16It's their confusion label.
22:17It's a statement.
22:18More of a question.
22:19Why?
22:22You know, it's funny.
22:24Since I wrote the blurb for the house, you know, for the auction, I've convinced myself
22:28about what a beautiful home this really is.
22:31I believed my own spin, which is nice.
22:34Well, it's not so beautiful for us having Epony back in our bedroom.
22:36Oh, no.
22:38Look.
22:39Koo-Jay's got a doo-doo right there near Froggy.
22:41Pick that up, please.
22:42That's not Koo-Jay.
22:44That's Mandy.
22:46Oh, God.
22:47Mandy's up to her old tricks again.
22:49We'll fling it back.
22:50It's a bad thing Kooey.
22:52Mandy.
22:53I'd be appreciated if you'd keep Barney out of our yard, too, please.
22:58Ow!
22:59Ow, Mandy!
23:00Oh, there's poo on Stella McCartney.
23:03Stella McCartney's got poo on the alley.
23:05Oh, we'll fling it back.
23:06Mandy!
23:06This is what?
23:08It's a little bit...
23:09Oh, there's a piece of it.
23:11Oh, that's Barney's.
23:12That's Barney's.
23:13Oh, I'm not touching it.
23:14Here.
23:15Well, fling it off to her.
23:16No, designer labels.
23:18No.