00:00Mula ng mga bata pa tayo, gustong-gusto na natin makakarinig tayo ng bedtime stories.
00:06Madalas sa mga kwentong ito ay tungkol sa aral ng tungay ng pagkakaibigan.
00:12Ako, totoo yan, Profi. Pero habang nagkakaedad tayo, nare-realize natin na sa totoong buhay,
00:18hindi palagi ganun kadaling mag-keep ng friendships.
00:21Galitong realizations din ang binahagi ng ating guest ngayong umaga,
00:25isang podcast host at author.
00:27Kasama natin live via Zoom, si Sarah May Luntu.
00:31Magandang umaga po at welcome to Rise and Shine, Pilipinas.
00:36Magandang umaga rin po.
00:38Good morning po, Ma'am Sarah. I am Ice Martinez with Profi.
00:42Si Ice po ito. Siyempre, gusto muna natin malaman kamusta ba ang relasyon mo sa iyong mga pinakamalalapit na kaibigan.
00:51Well, honestly, sobrang grateful ko at sobrang pakiramdam ko.
00:56Napakaswerte ko kasi sa dami ng tao sa mundo at sa hirap makahanap ng totoong kaibigan ngayon,
01:03nahanap ko sila.
01:04So, it took me a lot of years before I found my close-knit circle.
01:09So, sobrang blessed and thankful ako to have them in my life.
01:14Okay, Sarah, para sa'yo, paano mo mo masasabi na totoo at healthy ang isang pagkakaibigan?
01:20Does it require dapat kaibigan mo mula pagkabata o nung high school para talagang may test of friendship na?
01:26Or is it okay that at the age of 30, you found your people and you consider them as yung
01:32pinakatotoong kaibigan sa buhay mo?
01:33Tell us more, Sarah.
01:35Yes, so actually, through time din, nag-iiba yung definition ko about friends.
01:41Kasi nung elementary ako and high school, kagaya nang sinabi mo, I think, akala ko nun,
01:46pagkaibigan, kasama mo lang in good times and in bad times.
01:49Yun kasi yung usong definition nun.
01:51Pero as you get older, as your priorities change, as life happens,
01:56unti-unti siyang nag-iiba at nag-evolve yung hindi na siya yung parang ganito lang siya kasimple.
02:02So, to answer the question kung paano ko masasabi na totoo at healthy ang isang pagkakaibigan,
02:09well, totoo yung sinabi mo na through time, pag na-survive nyo yung test of time and test of life,
02:15isa yung proof, pero para sa akin, masasabi mo na totoo and healthy yung isang pagkakaibigan.
02:20Just like with a romantic relationship, if you can be true sa isa't isa,
02:26pag nagagawa mo yung mga bagay na kaya mong ipakita sa family mo or sa sarili mo, sa mga kaibigan
02:32mo,
02:33I think that's one thing para masabi mo na totoo.
02:36And para masabi mo naman na healthy, for me, if nasasabayan ka niya as you grow as a person,
02:43kasi may mga friendship na parang dito sa stage mo ng life na to, doon kayo nagkakilala.
02:48So, parang feeling mo pag nag-iba ka ng direksyon, pag nag-iba ka ng priorities,
02:53parang mawawala na rin yung friendship mo.
02:55So, for me, as you get older, as you reach your goals, if your friend is there with you,
03:01helping you grow, parehas kayo na nag-grow in life, including your friend.
03:06Yes, so ito nga yung ways para makip natin yung strong relationship natin with friends,
03:12nabanggit mo na.
03:13So, sa social media friends naman, yung mga nakikilala natin online,
03:17do we actually consider them as friends?
03:22For me, pwede, possible, kasi ako, meron akong mga nakilalang naging kaibigan ko because of my podcast.
03:31So, nilabas ko yung podcast ko, I share videos on my socials,
03:35and merong mga nag-connect sa akin dahil sa mga kwento ko.
03:39So, doon ko na-realize na, ah, stories can be bridges para magkaroon ka ng friends.
03:45Pero for me, it's not enough na doon lang kayo nag-start sa social media,
03:51and then, yun na lang yung papaikutin ng friendship ninyo.
03:55I think for me, pwede siyang maging start,
03:57pero kung gusto nyong mas lumalim yung friendship, I think it should be more than that.
04:02Parang meron pa kayong mga, dapat mag-show up kayo sa isa-isa on how you show or prove na
04:08isa ka talagang real friend.
04:10So, yun yung, yun yung take ko doon.
04:12So, alam mo, when it comes to friendship, kasi meron akong isa parang high maintenance, low maintenance.
04:18Yung high maintenance ito yung madalas ko laging kausap,
04:21as in, para kami mag-show ako mag-updatean minsan, pero it's really normal.
04:25Ah, okay, ganun pala yung term mo.
04:26As in, lahat ng mga problema mo sa buhay, ultimo yung pinaka hindi naman big deal,
04:31nasasabi mo siya.
04:32Meron din naman mga low maintenance friendships,
04:34hindi kayo lagi magkakasama,
04:36pero you guys, pa nagkasama kayo or nagkausap kayo,
04:39talagang, yeah, bukod sa may pag-iintindi, alam mo sila is always there for each other na hindi lagi nag
04:44-uusap.
04:46Do we have those kinds of friendships ba talaga?
04:48Is that okay?
04:50What are the pros and cons?
04:54Ayan, medyo nawala si ano.
04:56Ayan, siguro napagod kasi tatlo agad yung tanong ko na,
04:59na stuck agad siya.
05:01Ikaw ba yung mga nakikilala mo sa social media?
05:03Do you consider them as real friends?
05:05Ako hindi pa.
05:06Tapos nanginiwala ko na kailangan, may, merong organic counter for you.
05:10Yes, yung physical presence mo.
05:12Tsaka ano eh, minsan we, well, for me, social media is more of connections.
05:17Pero when it comes to really the friendship na gusto natin ma-establish,
05:22it should be somehow, merong involvement ng pagsasama.
05:26Dapat ang social media na gagamit yan to connect.
05:30Kunwari may kaibigan ka abroad,
05:31gamitin mong tool to make that friendship stronger.
05:34Ayun, okay na daw sabi ni Gilbert.
05:36Ikaw, ikaw, on high maintenance friendship kita.
05:39Kasi araw-araw tayo magkasama Gilbert.
05:40Our floor director, the best FD ever.
05:43Sige, mamay balikan natin si Sarah.
05:45Yes.
05:46Okay.
05:47Ayun na, Sarah, okay ka na?
05:48Ayun, okay.
05:49Opo, sorry.
05:50May question ko kanina yung sa low maintenance and high maintenance friendships.
05:54Yung low maintenance, okay lang ba yun?
05:55Yung ganun klaseng friendships?
05:58Sa akin, okay lang siya.
06:00Lalo na kapag tumatanda kayo,
06:01pag nag-iiba na yung mga priorities nyo in life.
06:04Kasi limited yung energy, limited yung resources.
06:08Pero grateful ka if you are still friends with these people.
06:11I do have my low maintenance friends.
06:13Kasi ito yung mga nakilala ko when I was younger.
06:17Elementary, high school, college.
06:19Nakaibigan ko pa rin ngayon.
06:20Pero I think, isang reason kung bakit okay pa rin yung friendship namin.
06:24Kasi nagkasama na kami ng matagal before, matindi na yung, or matatag na yung foundation namin.
06:31Kaya kahit hindi na kami magkita consistently or mag-usap lagi, we know na, we are still friends.
06:37Pero I just wanna say din na, hindi porkat low maintenance friends mo sila, low effort friendship na rin siya.
06:43Kasi minsan, parang ganun yung iniisip natin, ah, low maintenance naman sila, okay na to, huwag na tayo mag-effort.
06:50Pero I think, even high maintenance or low maintenance, parehas pa rin siyang relationship na you should nurture and you
06:57should take care.
06:58Kasi, it helps you and it helps you with life.
07:03Well, ito naman, kapag nag-iiba yung priority, so lifestyle mga kaibigan, malimbawa may nagpamilya na, may nag-ibang bansa,
07:10mayroon nagpa-person ng new career or mayroon nag-iba ng career path,
07:13are we going to maintain the closeness or paano ba natin ipapanatili ito?
07:19Or is it time for us to M-O-L-G or move on and let go?
07:25Gusto ko yung M-O-L-G.
07:27Gusto ko yung M-O-L-G.
07:31Depende siya sa mga klase ng kaibigan na gusto mong i-keep.
07:35Pero ako, yung mga close ko ngayon, na-meet ko rin sila dahil sa trabaho.
07:39And nagkataon na nag-iba-iba rin kami ng work.
07:41Teachers kami before and then ngayon we're not.
07:44And then merong mga nang ibang bansa din.
07:46Merong nag-asawa na, merong may boyfriend na, merong busy pa rin sa career.
07:51Pero kasi we feel like we are aligned sa values namin kung paano yung core namin.
07:56Kaya we choose to keep the friendship.
07:59Meron kaming mga ginagawa pa rin na parang quarterly catch-up.
08:03O kaya pag may big events sa buhay ng isang tao, we make sure na updated sila.
08:08Yung kahit na hindi sila mag-react agad or mag-reply sa GC.
08:13Minsan mag-send kami ng voice message, ng update.
08:16Parang enough na yun for us to make them feel na present ka pa rin sa life ko.
08:20Parang gusto ko pa rin updated ka.
08:23I think hindi lang dahil naghiwalay kayo ng trabaho, tapos na yung friendship.
08:28It's more of pa ba yung characters nyo or paano ba kayo sa isa-isa in order for you to
08:34realize if kailangan ba siyang i-keep.
08:36Though meron din naman na pag natapos mo ng katrabaho, pag di mo na nakikita araw-araw,
08:42hindi mo na talaga nakakausap.
08:43So, minsan, test?
08:47Tulad to, test.
08:48Yan, kung na-ba pa stop, big up.
08:50Gusto ko yung ganyan eh, big na na gano.
08:52Mag-stop.
08:52Ano yun?
08:53Yung kapag may newspaper dance dance, yung mag-stop.
08:56O, tapos mag-yayakapan kayo para hindi kayo mahulog.
08:58O, o.
08:59Stop dance, o, stop dance.
09:00We stay together.
09:01Yan, gusto ko yan.
09:02Sayang, ito yung next question sana.
09:04Paano yung ma-ano?
09:06Yung mga pwedeng maging advices sa mga taong na hirapan mag-keep.
09:08Yan, o, o.
09:09Pero kasi it's not easy.
09:11Kasi, really, if you really want to have the friendship na alam mong gusto mong para sa'yo,
09:16you don't always choose quantity.
09:18You always choose quality, no?
09:20Kasi,
09:21Parang nung mga bata tayo, we want to be surrounded with a lot of friends, eh.
09:24But as we grow older, parang we just wanna reserve our energy with the friends who are comfortable.
09:30Kaya, ang artist feels, kayo, friends ko, kayo.
09:33Joke lang.
09:34Hindi, friends, of course.
09:35Lagi di magkakasama.
09:37Well, anyway, thank you so much, ha, kay Sarah,
09:40sa kanyang mga sayang medyo na ano lang.
09:42Pero, syempre, napakaganda nung kanyang mga sinabi.
09:45Sana nung maging podcast segment about friendship.
09:48I love that.
09:49Because today is a friendship day.
09:51Yeah, okay.
09:51Para sa mga nakamiss nun.
09:53That's why we're talking about friendship.
09:55So, that was Miss Sarah Maylug.
09:57Thank you so much.
