00:00I had a really bad eating disorder for 20 years and I really struggled with it and I realized that
00:04I just didn't know when I was hungry and when I was full and I did all of it. I
00:08did anorexia,
00:09I did bulimia, I did overeating, I did undereating, I did all of it and I found that as soon
00:15as I
00:16could like tap into when am I hungry, when am I full, what are good things to eat and then
00:21not
00:21be afraid of things. Like two nights ago, I can't wait to post this video, my youngest and I opened
00:25up two pints of Haagen-Dazs. One was sweet vanilla almond, which I never had before. It's so good,
00:31oh it's one of my favorite flavors. So good, toasted almonds inside. It's the best. And then the other
00:35one was a Oreo cookie. Now that's mine. Did you mix them? Well we had like two spoons, like people
00:42should not dip into these ones if you're afraid of germs because they had both our germs all over.
00:47But like then you can do, and it was like 9 p.m. like so not being afraid of things
00:51but again like
00:52eating an amount that feels like your body can manage it. I love that you have gotten to a place
00:56where you feel confident and comfortable, not just with your body but with food noise. You were
01:01saying you were pregnant for so many, so much time in a row. When you were now at a period
01:05of time not
01:06being pregnant, did you feel like you had to like relearn your body or the conversation with your body?
01:10The like the am I fat, am I this, am I that? You know I did a lot of the
01:14work before. I really,
01:17really, I got one of the best things about having ADHD is we get very hyper-focused on certain
01:21things. That's true. And we can be bad too, but I, one of the good things that it did is
01:26I think
01:26it gave me hyper-focused on trying, like I need to solve this, like I don't want to live this
01:29way.
01:29I'm miserable, I can't have good relationships, I can't have good friendships, I can't eat out to
01:34dinner with people. Like it's just like so, so, so stressful. I'm afraid of how many calories might
01:38be in toothpaste, like just insanity. Yeah. And so I, I think I really, and I also wanted to make
01:45sure
01:45that I healed that before I had kids because I didn't want to pass my... The habits. Yes, down.
01:51Yeah. Um, almost said a bad word, probably can't do that here. Oh, you found a few, it depends
01:54on what word it is. I didn't want to let my shit down to it. Oh, yeah. I didn't want
01:56to pass my shit
01:56down to it. So I just want, I really feel that it was, and then it was interesting because
02:03growing, one of my best friends had a baby three weeks before me and all of a sudden, like I
02:07saw
02:08her right afterwards and I looked like a whale. I looked like Jabba the Hutt and she's like,
02:12and she's like gorgeous with like holding this baby. I'm like, what, what, what happened to you?
02:18Like what? And I was so, and she's like, you watch, it's going to happen to you too. And
02:22like, not right away, but like little by little, you're like, it's like, you're like a little
02:26shrinky dink. Oh my goodness. Oh my God. Did you, was, were those habits, did you hide
02:33them from your loved ones? The eating disorder? When I was younger, yeah. I mean, I started
02:38dieting when I was five. Wow. When you were five, that is wild. I mean, isn't it? And also
02:43it's just getting worse. What kids learn now, you know what I mean? Yeah. Cause if you learn
02:47that at five, now there's TikTok and everything where kids can see, it's really hard. Cause
02:51we, we were young dieters too. Oh yeah. Yeah. We've had weight fluctuations. And I often
02:56think about like, if Ozempic had been around when I was, you know, my heaviest, when I was
03:01like in sixth grade, would I have like somehow finagled my way to getting Ozempic at 12 years
03:05old? I feel like my willpower would have done it somehow, you know what I mean? But now we
03:09have like these peptides and Ozempic and looks maxing and all these things that like how
03:14what's the conversation with your kids around body image and stuff. And cause they're probably
03:17seeing a lot of stuff on TikTok. Yeah. I mean, obviously I think that some of it is going
03:22to be their experience and no matter how much I try to bubble wrap them, it's going to get
03:28through. So I think just having the conversations about it and not making it mystical. Like I feel
03:34like when I was younger and struggling more, I'd be like, how do these people do it? And
03:40you see in magazines, what you eat in a day and like, Oh, this is the South beach diet
03:45and all this stuff. And I was like, maybe this is what it has to be. Also I look back
03:50and
03:50I was like, I looked fine. Yeah. But I thought I was like, um, but I just thought there was
03:57something broken inside of me. And so what I tried to do with my kids is empower them, talk
04:02about strength, talk about how does the food make you feel? And then also not don't be
04:07like, Oh my God, no, you can't have Cheetos. Like I don't love that my kids eat Cheetos
04:11sometimes, but they really want to. And so if we don't shame it and it's not a regular
04:18thing, then there you go. You know what I mean? It's like balance. If they were like,
04:23if you were like Cheetos are this bad secret thing, they're like, I want it because it's
04:26like, it's like, I can't have it. So I want it. Right. So they have like feed yourself
04:30with mostly good things. Open up a pint of ice cream sometimes and take out a spoon.
04:35Yeah. But like be aware of your body. Like we can all relate to like Thanksgiving and like
04:41people feel pretty sick on Thanksgiving. Like don't have that be a regular thing.
04:45Right.
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